Chapter Text
Recognizing that voice immediately, he felt his heart stop beating. He thought the alcohol was really playing tricks on him, so he didn't stop and chose to keep walking.
“Hey! Wait for me, Hinata!”
This time, Kageyama's voice sounded right behind him, very close by, so Shoyo stopped and turned around. And yes, there was Kageyama, looking at him with a frown and a pout that, despite the passing years, he had never been able to erase from his stupidly cute expression. He was dressed in black and blue, his beautiful blue scarf just like the one he wore during his time at Karasuno, the winter night suiting him perfectly. After all, he was born in winter. Shoyo was about to lose his mind looking at Kageyama.
“It's just the stupid season,” he muttered without realizing it, thinking he had thought it.
“What?”
Shoyo blinked after hearing Kageyama's voice again. He shook his head, biting his lip.
“It's just... cold,” he laughed to cover it up. “What's wrong? Did I forget something?” Please don't mention the train station, please don't mention the train station.
What could Kageyama want with him? It was clear that he had moved on, perhaps he wanted to tell him face to face that he was engaged and boast that he was better off without him.
“I'll go with you.”
Yes, Shoyo would definitely lose his mind. He felt like he was about to collapse right there in the middle of the street.
“It's not necessary, Kageyama. I just wanted to walk a little. Natsu is on his way,” he excused himself.
He really didn't need Kageyama to accompany him. He needed to get away from him and stop thinking about what could have been and how much he missed Kageyama.
“You drank quite a bit. I'll walk you until Natsu comes for you.”
“Hey, I...”
“Suga-san is worried about you,” he said, frowning even more reproachfully. “I told him I would accompany you.”
“So it's Suga-san's idea...” he whispered, unable to hide his disappointment.
“He just said he was worried you'd run away like that. I was the one who decided to accompany you...” He looked away. “I just wanted to know if you were okay, because of your injury...”
It was truly overwhelming to hear those words after so long. Shoyo was happy and at the same time distressed.
“I'm better now. I haven't played much, but I'm getting more consistent.”
Kageyama nodded.
“Where are you going to see Natsu? I'll walk with you,” he said firmly, making it clear that saying no was not an option.
He’d always been stubborn; Shoyo knew that better than anyone, and he knew very well that Kageyama wouldn’t change his plans, so he sighed and started walking again.
“The park,” Shoyo pointed a couple of blocks ahead.
And Kageyama simply started walking. They walked the entire length of the street without either of them saying a word; Kageyama always found it difficult to start a conversation, but Shoyo felt a lump in his throat that left his mouth dry and without knowing what to say.
“You didn’t mention how long you’ll be around.”
“Oh… well, my flight leaves on January 4th; they gave me some time to visit my family.” He glanced sideways at Kageyama, trying not to be too obvious. “What about you, Kageyama-kun? Why are you taking a break?”
Shoyo knew that man very well, so he knew his expression get hardened when he asked that question.
“I asked for this break,” he confessed hesitantly. “I haven’t been playing well since the start of the season.”
“What do you mean? I’ve read the news, and it doesn’t… it doesn’t seem like you’ve been playing badly.”
Kageyama’s expression changed instantly; he looked a little uncomfortable.
“Physically, I’m performing well, but… let’s just say emotionally, I’m not at my best right now,” he said, looking up at the sky.
God, you’re really handsome, Shoyo thought, gazing at Kageyama’s profile.
“I see…” He paused for a moment; the alcohol was already making him feel dizzy.
“Are you okay?”
Kageyama moved closer to him but didn't actually touch him.
“I'm just dizzy. I can walk; don't worry.”
Kageyama’s phone started ringing, and he answered right away.
“Hello… yeah, everything’s fine. I’ve got… something to do, but I’ll be home soon…”
Shoyo felt annoyed, since that was probably a call from Kageyama’s supposed girlfriend, so he just kept walking.
“Sure, okay… see you later.”
“If you’re in a hurry, you can go. I’m not so bad off that I can’t wait a moment alone in the park,” he complained, sounding more resentful than he actually intended.
“I’m not in a hurry. I said I’d walk with you, and that’s what I’ll do.”
Somehow, that comment made Shoyo angry.
“Now you’re worried about me?”
Kageyama stopped immediately.
“Excuse me?” he said, sounding annoyed.
“You know, your fiancée might not be too happy to hear that you’re hanging out with a guy you used to sleep with,” he said, without stopping his walk.
Kageyama smirked.
“So that’s your problem?” he said sarcastically, quickly approaching to Shoyo.
Shoyo finally frowned and stopped to turn and look at Kageyama.
“I don’t have any problem about that.”
“Sure, you don’t have it,” he said sarcastically. “That’s probably why you hid as soon as you saw me at the station.”
And yes, Shoyo froze solid, even though he already knew Kageyama had seen him, but hearing him say it to his face was much worse.
“You’re crazy, that’s not why at all!” he had already started yelling. “Don’t get the wrong idea, Kageyama-kun. Don’t think you’re that important.” Yes, you are; yes, that’s why, he thought, even if he said the opposite out loud.
The smile Kageyama showed wasn’t mocking at all; it was a smile of sadness and pain. That expression made Shoyo feeling hurt to the bone.
“No, I’m definitely not… you made that clear four years ago,” he moved dangerously close to Shoyo, “but acting like an idiot doesn’t suit you at all when you have to spend time with me.”
“If I didn’t want you to see me, it was so you wouldn’t feel uncomfortable,” he replied defensively, even though the other guy was right. “You stopped talking to me altogether! I thought we could still be friends, but you didn’t even text me to ask how I was doing when I got injured!”
He had stopped looking at him. Shoyo didn’t realize it, but he had started crying while he was yelling. All the frustration, all the anger, all his feelings of jealousy, love, and longing for Kageyama Tobio, feelings that wouldn’t go away suddenly hit him, harder than ever. It must have been the season, and the alcohol, too.
“You broke my heart.”
There it was, the answer Shoyo already knew. It was all too obvious; that was just the way Kageyama was. Shoyo couldn’t ask him to break up and then continue their “friendship” as if nothing had happened. Because they had never really been that close; they had always been teammates, soulmates, and he’d known that since his first month at Karasuno even if he hadn’t yet realized he was in love with Kageyama. But Shoyo was petty at heart; he still wanted Kageyama all to himself, so he clenched his fists, feeling utterly helpless.
“Did you really want me to sit around crying over you after all that? I felt devastated because that’s how you left me!”
No, he didn’t want that, but knowing that Kageyama was with someone else felt just awful.
“So devastated that not long after, you were fucking other people,” he muttered.
Kageyama was furious at that comment. When he returned to Brazil, Shoyo met a player from Asas São Paulo who was about to transfer to Ali Roma. They stayed in touch; the guy was bisexual, and they developed a certain rapport. One time, the guy told him that his “former high school teammate” Kageyama Tobio had been seen with other guys in a romantic setting.
Kageyama started laughing again.
“That’s definitely the worst reproach you’ve spat out today. Did you want me to get depressed and stay obsessed with you after all? Didn’t I have the right to deal with the situation in some fucking way, even if it was a stupid way?!” He was shouting now. “I guess I should’ve begged you day and night while you were making videos dancing banza or whatever it’s called!”
“It’s called samba, you idiot!”
It was so easy for Kageyama to say something like that; Shoyo wasn’t having a good time. He put on a perfect front, but he wasn’t okay.
“How many damn twinks did you fuck while you were supposedly devastated?!”
“A lot…!” He stared at Shoyo, a mocking look on his face. “And they all tightened my cock better than you.”
And suddenly Shoyo felt a vile jealousy and extreme fury take hold of his entire body. He couldn’t hold it back; tears welled up in his eyes, rage coursed through his veins, poisoning his blood, and the pounding of his heart echoed in his ears.
“You’re a damn idiot, Kageyama Tobio!” He slapped him hard, just like when he hits a ball to spike it.
The impact was so strong that Kageyama took a step back and immediately touched his cheek. Shoyo was breathing heavily and fell completely silent, not knowing what to do. He was shocked by his reaction, hurt, sad tears were still streaming down his cold cheeks. He looked at Kageyama, who was still staring down at the ground in front of him without saying a word, and then Kageyama lifted his head to look him straight in the eyes. He looked angry, furious just like him, and moved closer to Shoyo.
“Looks like I am that important after all,” he teased, giving him a smirk.
Shoyo wanted to scream in frustration, but Kageyama moved faster toward him, so he thrust his hands out to push him away. He thought Kageyama would strike back… but instead, Kageyama gripped both his hands tightly. Shoyo struggled to break free from his grip; he didn’t know what he was planning, but he was a little drunk, and Kageyama outmaneuvered him, forcing him to walk backward until his back hit the wall.
“Get off me!” he complained, sounding dejected and desperate.
But Kageyama didn’t listen and kissed him without hesitation. Shoyo struggled, but Kageyama’s breath and his firm grip made him give in immediately; in a very embarrassing way, he surrendered to the first touch of his lips and the warm tongue caressing his own. It felt so damn good; kissing Kageyama felt so, so exhilarating. No matter the circumstances under which the interaction was taking place, Shoyo melted like butter in Kageyama’s hands. It had always been that way, longing for his compliments, his recognition, his caresses, and his kisses.
Shoyo clung tightly to Kageyama’s clothes, sobbing as their kiss ended. He didn’t realize when he’d let go of his hands to wrap them around his waist. Kageyama leaned in close to his ear.
“Come home with me,” he pleaded, sounding truly desperate.
Shoyo wanted to say yes right away, but he couldn’t play that part. He lifted his face to look into Kageyama’s dark blue eyes, and then he noticed that it had already started to snow. Kageyama was winter, and winter was Kageyama. After four years, Shoyo was finally able to see the snow again, just as he was able to see the genuine longing in Kageyama’s eyes once more. Still, he couldn’t do it. With tears welling up in his eyes, he opened his mouth to reply.
“I don’t…”
“That girl isn’t my fiancée, she’s not even my girlfriend,” he said firmly. “Do you really need any further explanation?”
Shoyo’s heart was racing. No, he didn’t need anything else.
.
His house was close to the bar, so they didn’t have to walk very far. The walk was silent; they practically ran there. They didn’t need to say anything else because everything had already been said. They started kissing and touching each other as soon as they stepped through the genkan, stumbling as they took off their shoes. Tobio sat down first and pulled Shoyo by the hand until he was sitting on top of him so they could keep kissing. Shoyo slowly rubbed his butt against the erect cock.
Their coats had already fallen to the floor, and Tobio was desperate to have Shoyo in his room all to himself, just for him. He was too anxious; he’d waited far too long and couldn’t hold back any longer. His hands slipped under Shoyo’s shirt. He pinched Shoyo’s nipples, hearing the sweet moans of his beloved. In a few minutes he’d have him moaning even louder; he could barely wait to be inside him.
“W… wait… Tobio… wait,” he said, grabbing his large hands to stop him.
And Tobio stopped immediately, stopped kissing him and touching his chest. He pulled his hands out from under Shoyo’s shirt and placed them on both of Shoyo’s cheeks, staring intently at him.
“Again,” he demanded, knowing that Shoyo belonged only to him.
“What?” Shoyo was confused.
“Say my name again.”
Shoyo's beautiful face turned even redder than it already was. But Shoyo simply looked away from those blue eyes, and then, without waiting for a reply, Tobio shifted their positions, laying Shoyo back on the sofa while he positioned himself between his legs.
“Wait! Tobio… Tobio, my love, please wait,” he said, feeling very nervous as he called him that.
Tobio rested his head on Shoyo’s shoulder; he felt embarrassed to hear Shoyo call him my love again.
“I need… a shower before…”
Shoyo didn’t have to say anything else; Tobio jumped up right away, picked him up in a princess style, and carried him to his room.
.
The wait was too long for his liking. He could barely tear himself away from Shoyo to let him get clean and ready; he was going to make love to him all night, so he should at least give him a few moments to get ready on his own. Tobio had taken off his clothes and was standing there in just his boxers, staring at the door to his room and waiting patiently for Shoyo to come in.
He had dropped his phone, so he picked it up to check his messages. There were texts from Suga-san, Tadashi, and Miwa.
Suga-san: Did you get home okay?
Tadashi: Tell me you managed to work things out, Kei is worried.
Miwa: The -something- is it about Shoyo-kun?
It was Miwa who called him while he was walking with Shoyo. He couldn’t believe that something completely out of his control and rather random had put Shoyo in such a bad mood and made him so jealous. He replied to Suga-san with a short yes and to Tadashi with I’ll tell you later. He was about to reply to his sister when the door finally opened and Shoyo walked in, wearing nothing but a towel around his waist. Tobio immediately threw his phone aside as best he could; he needed to focus all his attention on Shoyo.
And Shoyo was avoiding his gaze; he just stood there with his hands stiffly pressed against his stomach and his face completely red.
“Are you shy now? I’ve seen your naked body since you were fifteen.”
“Bakageyama… that doesn’t make it any easier.”
“Just come over to the bed, or I’ll do it on the floor.”
His voice was so deep, serious, and full of desire that Shoyo thought he might faint right then and there. He shifted and let go of the towel, which fell completely to the floor, exposing his manhood. He felt incredibly self-conscious, now that he was so close to Tobio.
“I wasn’t expecting this… I didn’t… shave…” he whispered, embarrassed.
Tobio held him by the hips, looking at his pretty dick and the orange hair around it.
“I like it better this way; I love that you’re orange haired,” he said with a sweet smile and kissed the right side of Shoyo’s hip.
God, if Shoyo hadn’t died while showering and getting ready to be fucked, he would definitely die from that cute smile and those sweet words. He covered his face with both hands.
“Even if those twinks tightened your cock better than I did?” He sounded more sad than petty, and immediately hated himself for ruining the moment.
“You know that wasn’t true, I was just upset,” he said, caressing Shoyo’s hips with both hands.
“Are you still upset with me?” Shoyo asked, feeling a deep sadness wash over him again. “Have you hated me, Kageyama-kun? Do you hate me?” sorrow flooded his chest once more.
The shadow of his own actions ruining everything fell upon him once more. The sadness he had put Kageyama through and that he had inflicted upon himself couldn’t be erased so easily.
“Shoyo… look at me,” he waited until he saw those brown doe eyes staring back at him, “please look at me.”
Shoyo opened his eyes reluctantly; the tears were ready to start flowing again.
“Look at me closely and tell me if you really think I hate you,” he said, wrapping his arms tightly around his waist.
Shoyo shook his head.
“I’ve never hated you, not even for a moment. You’ve been the only one for me from the very beginning. I was the first to confess my feelings, and maybe I wasn’t the first to say I love you, but I was definitely the first to want to say it,” he said with a sweet smile.
“You should, Tobio… precisely because of that, and after everything I’ve done… you should,” he couldn’t help but feel sad, and he avoided Tobio’s blue eyes.
In response, Tobio frowned, staring intently at him even though Shoyo was looking away.
“Then I’d better prove to you that’s not the case so you’ll understand,” he said with conviction.
Without another word, Tobio took Shoyo’s cock and put it in his mouth. Shoyo nearly fell over from the shock and the warm sensation of that wet mouth sucking on his cock.
“Meu deus! Ahhh…!” His senses and thoughts were so overwhelmed by Tobio’s mouth that he began speaking Portuguese without even realizing it.
“Ahhhhh! Just like that, Tobio! More!” He was already on the verge of climax.
Tobio smiled down at the back of Shoyo’s neck. They had changed positions for the second time; he was entering him from behind, both of them lying on their sides on the bed. Tobio had his left hand holding Shoyo’s leg so he could go deeper and deeper with each thrust, feeling Shoyo’s insides tighten around him more and more. It was the best feeling in the world, making love to the person he loved most.
“Do you like it like this? You’re so tight for me, you’re perfect,” he whispered close to his ear. “I love you, Sho. You’re the only one for me.”
“Oh my God…!” The orgasm hit him, overwhelming all his senses. “Tobii… Ahhh!”
Tears welled up in Shoyo’s eyes; he was too aroused. Warmth and satisfaction filled every part of his body and his heart. Tobio kissed his neck while continuing to thrust into his ass faster and deeper. It didn’t take long before he sank his teeth into his neck as he came inside him. Shoyo didn’t want him to put on a condom; he wanted to feel it all, he wanted Tobio inside him and to feel his cum inside and dripping down his thighs.
Tobio let go of Shoyo’s leg and instead placed his hand on his tummy, stroking it gently, with the silly notion that he had marked his lover once again with his entire cum inside him. He felt Shoyo turn his head to look at him, trying to match his breathing, and saw that his face was covered in tears. Shoyo looked beautiful, and Tobio fell even more in love.
“Happy birthday, Tobi,” he smiled sweetly and leaned in to kiss Tobio on the lips. “I love you too, I never stopped loving you.”
And yes, Tobio couldn’t have been happier.
He always knew that Shoyo was the one for him, in every way.
After another round of making love, they were both lying there, their legs intertwined beneath the sheets, while Tobio gently caressed the curve where Shoyo’s torso met his hip. They couldn’t stop gazing at each other in silence. Exhaustion was getting the better of Shoyo, but he didn’t want to fall asleep; it was a perfect night.
“Did you really follow me because Suga-san suggested it?”
That’s how the silence was broken; Shoyo didn’t want to be left with any doubts.
“Of course not.”
At that, Shoyo smiled amusedly.
“What would you have done if I’d decided to go with Tadashi?” he asked, curious to hear the answer.
Tobio shifted beneath the sheets and stared at the ceiling.
“I would have gone too,” he said, looking back at him. “I made this trip because I was coming for you; I wasn’t going to let you go for any reason in the world.”
A rush of emotion coursed through Shoyo’s body, and the urge to stand up made him sit up eagerly and look at Tobio.
“You said you asked for a break because you weren’t at peace, so… then…”
“I wasn’t at peace because I couldn’t see you or have you… don’t you get it yet?” He sat down too, staring intently at Shoyo. “My plan was to travel to Brazil to find you,” he confessed very clearly so that Shoyo wouldn’t doubt him.
“W…what?”
“If Tadashi hadn’t told me you were coming to Japan…”
“Tadashi?!” Shoyo shouted, surprised. “He promised that…”
“Does it really matter now?” he asked, pointedly noting that it was partly thanks to Tadashi that they were together at that moment.
Shoyo leaned back again and bit his lip.
“And just so you don’t keep thinking silly things, the rumor about that girl was started by my agent. Her name is Elena, and she’s a lesbian, so she understands these kinds of things and didn’t mind ‘helping.’ I said I didn’t care, but they insisted on doing it,” he explained, pulling Shoyo into another hug. “There’s no ring situation, that was a rumor even worse… And that call it was Miwa. She and my parents will be here around noon.”
Shoyo’s face turned adorably red again.
“Why didn’t you say anything when Nishinoya and Tanaka brought it up?” he asked, annoyed and embarrassed.
“Because I wanted to see your reaction. It was so satisfying to see you jealous,” he teased him.
Tobio immediately felt a hit on his chest.
“Bakageyama,” he said, then leaned in and gave her a tender kiss on the lips. “I love you.”
Tobio smiled and kissed him back, this time a deeper kiss with tongue.
“I’ll never put us through something like that again, I promise,” Shoyo said, pulling away from the kiss urgently.
“I won’t let you do that. You’re my destiny, Shoyo; you always have been,” he said, caressing his face. “I’ve known it since high school.”
He couldn't have heard anything better than that; Shoyo was overjoyed. They kept kissing until Tobio was the one to break it off.
“Two thousand forty-one.”
“What?”
“Counting today’s beer, I’ve beaten you two thousand forty-one times, and you’ve beaten me two thousand thirty-five times.”
Shoyo turned over onto his stomach and covered his face in embarrassment.
“I haven’t lost count either…”
Tobio kissed him on the head.
“I know, boke… My family will be here tomorrow; stay for lunch with us,” he asked, not expecting a refusal.
“But…”
“My parents already know, Shoyo. I didn’t even have to tell them, they already knew,” he explained.
Shoyo bowed his head, burying his face in Tobio’s neck.
“I’m sure they hate me… especially Miwa-ne-san,” he lamented.
He cared deeply for Miwa, but after drifting apart from Tobio, he didn’t know how to keep in touch and assumed she wouldn’t want to talk to him.
“Don’t be silly, they’ll be happy to see you.”
“O… okay” anyway, Shoyo could never say no.
“I want to spend Christmas with you.”
Shoyo’s face already hurt from smiling so much.
“Of course, Kageyama-kun. I’ll spend every Christmas with you, forever,” he gave him a sweet kiss on the lips. “Is there anything else you want from me?”
“Yeah.”
“Go ahead.”
“Come with me to the shrine on New Year’s Day.”
Shoyo started laughing.
“Finally!” It was the first time Tobio had asked that to Shoyo.
“And do that move again, the one when you ride me reverse” he squeezed Shoyo’s ass cheeks and moved, pulling Shoyo on top of him.
“Such a perv…”
Shoyo was ready for another round; he couldn’t sleep. He could never get enough of Tobio; he would always want more of him. He wasn’t going to chase after him anymore, but in return, he would always be by his side. They were each other’s destiny; that was now an unshakable fact.