Chapter Text
Moon_Mom: WHERE THE FUCK IS MY LEG
TheDuckFather: LANGUAGE
Moon_Mom: FUCK OFF
TheDuckFather: THE KIDS, DELLA
Moon_Mom: DID THEY SNATCH MY FUCKING LEG
TheDuckFather: NO
TheDuckFather: well actually they might’ve idk
TheDuckFather: BUT THE POINT I’M MAKING IS YOU CAN’T SWEAR WHEN THEY’RE AROUND
Moon_Mom: KIDS DID YOU SISTER SNATCH MY LEG
GreenerPastures: Genuinely regretting teaching mom memes
GreenerPastures: also idk where your leg is
DieHard: I didn’t do it
SmolNerd: Even if we did know, we’re currently in France and wouldn’t be of any help.
Chief: pretty sure I saw Webby with it earlier
Ponk: tractor
Ponk: *traitor
Chief: f
Ponk: I just took it to examine it I swear
Moon_Mom: I CANT FUCKING WALK
Chief: höp
GreenerPastures: why are there dots on ur o
Chief: top quality meme content
Moon_Mom: nvm ya’ll I’m out here hopping
TheDuckFather: Della you take your leg off and hop around for fun
TheDuckFather: why did you even care
TheDuckFather: also language
Moon_Mom: I’ve had 4 energy drinks and seven coffees
Moon_Mom: not in that order
Tina: Well, that explains why we’re out of coffee.
Moon_Mom: I regret nothing
Tina: You will.
Chief: AND I OOP-
TollNerd: That was ominous-
Moon_Mom: I’m šçårëd
DieHard: why is everyone putting symbols on letters
Moon_Mom: fun
Moon_Mom: but seriously I fear my life
Moon_Mom: que intense hopping
Tina: Why bother?
Tina: Theres no point in running, dear.
Moon_Mom: FUCKKK
TheDuckFather: watch your language or I’ll join forces with Mrs B
Tina: Please don’t.
TheDuckFather: you’re ruining the threat
Tina: In my defence you’d ruin my whole thing.
WorldsBestCop: what thing?
Ponk: the ability to kill seven men with a single stare
WorldsBestCop: Oh wow
Penny: Might I join you in combat
Tina: I shall consider it.
Moon_Mom: first of all Penny I’m proud of you for improving your texting
Moon_Mom: second of all TRAITOR
Moon_Mom: YOU CANNOT JUST COME INTO MY HOUSE/PLANET
Moon_Mom: AND BE SUCH A THOT
Penny: what is a thot
Moon_Mom: …
Tina: Penumbra, your offer has been considered, and ultimately declined.
Penny: pitiful earthers
Moon_Mom: careful she’ll come for you
Tina: Della, dear, where are you?
Moon_Mom: God’s house
GreenerPastures: she probs means funzos
GreenerPastures: she cried tears of joy when she saw the ball pit
Tina: Thank you, Louie.
Tina: If I discover you have lied to me I will crush you with my bare hands.
GreenerPastures: god I love grandmotherly love
Moon_Mom: Louie how could you sell me out
DieHard: have you met him
Biolet: What is happening?
Chief: to summarise, Tea Time’s gonna kill Della because she drank like way too many coffees and energy drinks
Biolet: I see you are all up to your usual shenanigans.
Chief: of course
TollNerd: Is this what everyday life is like for you??
GreenerPastures: pretty much
DieHard: yup
SmolNerd: Yes.
Ponk: every single day
TollNerd: huh
Moon_Mom: I’m on the run y’all
SmolNerd: Why would you text that to a groupchat that Beakley’s in?
Moon_Mom: it seems like a good idea at the time
SmolNerd: The time being approximately five seconds ago?
Moon_Mom: Donald raised you better than this
GreenerPastures: he did not
DieHard: why would you think he did that
TheDuckFather: I tried
Moon_Mom: yo Beakley hasn’t texted in a while should I be worried
Moon_Mom: HOLY MOTHER OF GOD
Moon_Mom: THE ANSWER WAS YES
OldMan: i take it she found you
Moon_Mom: SHE’S ON A ROOF??!!?!
Ponk: Granny is so cool
Chief: i love it when my best friends Granny climbs into a roof to kill my best friends brothers mom for drinking all the coffee
Chief: specially when I drank like half the coffee anyway
Tina: Pardon?
Chief: can’t come for me
Chief: that would be abuse
Tina: I don’t care.
Tina: Lena, stay put while I deal with Della.
Chief: why tf would I do that
TheDuckFather: Language
Tina: Because there’s no point in running from me.
Chief: damn
Moon_Mom: I HAVE NEVER HOPPED SO FAST IN MY LIFE
Moon_Mom: I LEGIT CAN’T HOP ANY FASTER
Tina: I hope you can.
Moon_Mom: WEBBY
Moon_Mom: WHY DID YOU HAVE TO TAKE MY LEG
DieHard: quick webby yeet the leg at mom
Ponk: nah
Ponk: I ain’t standing in between granny and her target
Moon_Mom: I swear I will go back to the freaking moon
GreenerPastures: rude
DorkWing: Della where are you?
Moon_Mom: w h y
DorkWing: cause I swear I just heard something thinking on my roof
DorkWing: and you said Mrs B was on the roof of a building-
Moon_Mom: WAIT DO YOU LIVE IN A BUILDING WITH YELLOW DOORS
DorkWing: uuuuh
DorkWing: I think so???
DorkWing: idk I can’t remember
TollNerd: How can you not remember that?
DorkWing: don’t judge me
Bleh: Don’t judge my boyfriend
DorkWing: Thanks Lp
Moon_Mom: Beakley thump twice on the building
DorkWing: yo I just heard two thumps above me :O
Tina: Mr Mallard, if you even consider harbouring a fugitive it will be the last thing you do.
DorkWing: a fugitive?
Moon_Mom: this is so intense-
Moon_Mom: Drake please help
DorkWing: You’re on your own
Moon_Mom: DAMMIT DRAKE
Moon_Mom: I CAN’T HOP FOREVER
Tina: Damn right you can’t.