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You found out in the morning, after waking up to an empty bed. You thought maybe he was making you breakfast, but there was no one in the kitchens. Next you tried the gardens, a particular spot under the cherry blossom trees where he liked to meditate, but didn’t see him there either. By now you were growing worried; the first servant you saw, you stopped them and asked if they’d seen him.
“Miss, you haven’t heard?” The distress in their voice was evident, and a feeling of dread crept into your heart.
“No, what is it?”
“Master Genji is dead.”
When you found out that Genji, your beautiful, spirited Genji was dead, your life ended. And when you found out that it was his brother, your friend, that killed him? You flew into a rage that could hardly be contained in your body. You wanted to rip the tongue from the mouth that gave you this news, you wanted to tear the memory of it from your mind, but you simply pushed past them and out the gates of his - your - home. You were together for five years, friends for ten years before that. He was all that you had, and you will not let his death go before giving every fiber of your being to avenging him.
Your search for Hanzo spans much longer than your fury could burn. You spend your next years in motels and hostels around the world, tracing leads and ghosts all the way. The fire still rests deep in your belly, simply dampened by time, waiting for something to kindle it again.
It happens when you visit your lover's shrine; you hear footsteps and react accordingly, slipping behind a wooden post. You listen as the stranger places a few things before the shrine, something bittersweet about the fact that you are not the only one still missing Genji. But then the stranger speaks; just a few simple words, and the flame ignites in you.
You have imagined this day so many times, played over what you would do to your lover's murderer time and time again, but all that slips away from you now that he is so close. With a scream, you tear around the pillar, drawing your rifle and aiming. But he is a Shimada and it is not that easy; though his eyes are widened in temporary surprise, he darts out of the way with ease, drawing his bow.
In his confusion he lets your name slip from his lips as a question; at one time, long ago, he had been like a big brother to you. Now he is the enemy. Everything since Genji's death has been leading up to this. In your sorrow and your white-hot, all-consuming anger, you shoot again and again, the man weaving out of the way of every bullet. Though his bow is drawn with an arrow notched, he does not return fire. You just keep pushing him back until you've gone through all of your bullets, the most damage to Hanzo being a slight graze on his arm, and though it must hurt he still does nothing to attempt to incapacitate you.
Your gun now useless, you drop it and charge at the much larger man, spitting, "You killed him, he was your brother and you fucking killed him! You're a murderer, Hanzo, you took everything from me!" Your fist collides with his jaw, his chest, his stomach, and your sobs drown out every other sound. You can't see through your tears and Hanzo silently takes your abuse, staggering slightly, not even resisting when you draw a blade and press it to his throat.
"You are not getting away with what you've done," you hiss, ready to make that one final, slicing arc, until two metal arms wrap around your middle, pulling you back. You attempt to stab backwards but one of the arms leaves your stomach and catches your wrist, squeezing until you drop the blade. Weaponless, you squirm and twist and kick, but realizing the futility of your struggle you still; with blurred vision you finally see Hanzo raise his bow.
"Put them down," he commands, but the grip on you doesn't loosen.
"Ah ah, I think this is enough violence for one night, Hanzo. y/n has calmed down, follow their example."
The bowman narrows his eyes and repeats, "Put. Them. Down."
And just like that, you're placed back on your own two feet. You immediately whirl around to find yourself facing a cyborg, who tilts its face down to yours.
"Who are you?"
You do not see the warning look and shake of the head Hanzo directs its way. The borg shifts and Hanzo says aloud, "They are not ready."
"Ready for what?" you demand, voice thick.
"Really, you do not recognize the sound of my voice? Has it been so long, little blossom?"
You vaguely hear Hanzo sigh and excuse himself, but cannot focus on him in the slightest when your mind has stopped short.
No. No, no, no, you stagger backwards, away from his words, before collapsing to your knees. You squeeze your eyes shut and will that little nickname to have not been spoken. There is only one person who called you that, but he isn't here, he's dead. The green lights that shone from the borg's armor glows behind your eyelids, and you can't help but remember the time you spent helping dye Genji's hair the same color just days before... no one else would wear that stupid shade. Only him. Only him. You feel a hand on your cheek, thumbing away the tears that fall, before there's a mechanical hissing sound, the sound of steam being released.
You open your eyes, and find yourself staring at a ghost. His skin is scarred almost beyond recognition, but those warm honey eyes are exactly the same as when you last saw them.
These past years, in your grief, you have been hunting down a man for murdering this very same person who now kneels in front of you, his eyes so full of pain.
Hesitantly you reach up a hand, and finding no indication that you should stop, brush your fingertips over his bumpy skin. His eyes slip shut as he leans into your touch and you marvel at this miracle, before yanking your hand away as if his skin burns you.
"What is wrong, my flower?" he wonders, before realizing he should not have said that.
"You... you do not get to call me that. I thought you were dead, Genji. Do you fucking understand? Dead. I mourned you. And all this time, you were alive? What, could you not spare a moment in all these years to let me know that my fiancé hadn't been murdered? I have been hunting Hanzo with the intent of killing him to avenge you! Why do you show up now? Huh?"
"I... cannot explain. I needed time. I'm back now, though. I’m here."
"That is no excuse for how much pain you've left me in, Genji. You needed your time. Now I need mine."
With a belly full of ice, you stand and walk away, leaving behind the man you love in favor of a life you no longer know how to live, lacking even a reason to fight. Your flame is burnt out.