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This must be a dream.
There’s a melody in my head, a deep baritone voice singing an otherworldly tune, the likeness of which I’ve never heard. The voice is impossible, too, like a religious experience. It has to be a dream.
I don’t see anything. Not even like I’m in mist or pouring rain, it’s absolute darkness. I can feel the rise and fall of my breath, and know I’m laying down on a mattress, covered by clean sheets. Am I in a bed? Why would someone dream that?
Sometimes people assume that if their eyes aren’t open in a dream that means they can't open them at all. It’s not a struggle for me, though. They open just fine.
And here I am, in Shepard’s- our- cabin on the Normandy. I am undoubtedly awake. It’s zero dark thirty, because the lights are still dimmed and I feel groggy as hell. Actually it’s more akin to being run over by a Mako, if I’m being completely honest. Why…? Oh right. Whiskey. A little too much of it.
The events of last night come back to me and I grin. More than worth it, I’d say.
I’m amazed to realize the voice wasn’t actually a dream. It’s still there, floating gently in the cool cabin air, though it’s not in any tongue I recognize. I’m wondering if I should get my translator, but I don’t want to lose a single note so I opt not to. The sound of the shower turning on muffles the song now, but I can still hear it, echoing off the bathroom walls. So that means it’s Shepard, my Shepard, that sounds like an angel. How and why did he hide this from me? With such a gift, he should be sharing it with the world. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a voice so amazing.
Seriously, what could the man not do?
Hoping he isn’t too bashful about it, I slink across the room, though it’s not like he’d be able to hear me, and slip into the bathroom as softly as I can. I definitely don’t want to startle him, but I also don’t want to startle the song, don’t want it to fly away like a dove in the breeze, and that might happen if I stomp in like an old Earth rhino. So I’m walking the line here.
He’s facing the wall, muscles moving in a way that makes me shiver every time- especially those glutes, my goodness that isn’t fair- but he turns around as I cross the threshold. The voice trails off, much to my dismay, and unbelievably, he blushes. He’d tell me it’s the hot shower turning him crimson, but I know better. And I’m shocked.
John Shepard knows how to blush. Well I never thought I’d see the day, but here it is.
I strip out of my briefs and join him in the shower, moving near him but a few inches away from actually touching. He’s watching me closely, curious.
“What is that song?” The haunting piece still thrums in my head, like it’s taken up residence, an alien with a broken heart now living somewhere inside me.
“It’s an old asari love song.”
“Wait, you speak asari?”
“Well, a little. Liara taught me some. Enough to sing a few songs, at least.”
“Can you… uh, keep going?” My voice is shy and low, of course. If he won’t keep going, maybe I’ll beg him for it. He does like it when I beg.
“You liked it?”
“Well yeah. Loved it, even.”
“That’s sweet. I suppose I could sing for you. Maybe I should serenade you later? Throw some roses on the bed and light some candles for good measure?” He leans closer to whisper in my ear. “Before I fuck you into the mattress, of course.”
“Shepard, stop.” There’s goosebumps all over my skin though; he knows I love it when he says stuff like that. “I really want to hear it again. Sing more for me, please?”
“Alright, K.” He closes his eyes for a moment, finding the notes. At first, it’s soft, and his eyes remain shut. Concentrating, or blocking me out, maybe. I reach out and grab his hips, pulling him against me, putting my head on his shoulder and swaying back and forth. His voice is louder by my ear, and I just lose myself in it.
I’m reminded of the first time I saw him naked, after he took off that blindfold. That he stole my breath away with just the sight of his body there, waiting for me, wanting me, is something etched into my memory forever. And now so is this moment.
Just another part of the package that is John Shepard… a package that I love with all of my heart and soul.