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Smoke in the Lungs
Or in in which omega!Viktor suffers through the miracle of pregnancy and alpha!Yuuri suffers through impending fatherhood.
Viktor sighed loudly, rolled over, and punched the pillow under his head into a more comfortable shape. He laid back down, closed his eyes, and then opened them minutes later when it became apparent he wasn’t going to get comfortable. He pressed the heels of his hands into his bruised eyes with a whimper and then laced his fingers beneath his belly.
“Let me sleep,” he moaned quietly to the seven-month bump which wasn’t so much a bump as it was its own continent now. “Please, let me sleep.”
Viktor burst into tears when his baby began shifting. The movements had been amusing at first, truly miraculous and astounding and breath-taking: now they took Viktor’s breath away in the worst possible way when he got kicked in the ribs. Feeling his baby move within him had quickly lost its charm when the butterfly light touches turned into jabs at his liver at three in the morning and his baby began practicing quad flip after quad flip on his bladder for hours on end.
“Vi-chan?” Hiroko, now retired but still a constant presence at Yu-topia especially with her impending grandchild, poked her head into the room. “Vi-chan, why the tears?”
Viktor just sniffled. Hiroko sat herself down in Viktor’s nest of blankets and pillows and pulled him between her outstretched legs so that he could rest against her. The size difference between the two of them was comical, but there was no mistaking who was taking care of who. Viktor tucked his head beneath Hiroko’s chin and immediately removed his hands from beneath his belly to his to grab at Hiroko’s and settle them on top of the swell. He could rub all he wanted and so could Yuuri, but only Hiroko’s touch could settle the baby. It only took a few gentle sweeps of Hiroko’s palms against Viktor’s robe for the shifting inside of Viktor to slow and then stop altogether. Viktor actually began crying in relief and ruined what work Hiroko had accomplished.
“Why the tears?” Hiroko prompted again as she continued to rub Viktor’s belly with one hand while the other snuck beneath his bangs to feel his forehead.
“I’m so tired.” Viktor jerked when his baby kicked a particularly sore spot: Hiroko quickly moved her hand to the where there was the most movement. “I’m so tired.” Viktor’s voice cracked and he began sobbing again. “I don’t want to be pregnant anymore!”
Hiroko tried to shush him. “I know, luv, I know. You’re uncomfortable.” Viktor did feel a bit warm, but given how hard he was crying, Hiroko couldn’t tell if he was running a fever or not. “Unfortunately, you don’t have much of a choice. You still have at least two more months to go.”
This only made Viktor cry harder.
“Try to calm down,” she said gently. “You’re only going to make your baby more upset. Take a few deep breaths, Vi-chan.”
If anyone else ever suggested that Viktor “calm down” or take “deep breaths,” there would have been World War III. But given than Hiroko had not only given birth to one child but two, she was allowed some leeway. After a few minutes of slow breathing and no letup of Hiroko’s magical hands, the baby quieted. Viktor just sagged in relief and sniffled.
“Vi-chan, what’s really the matter?” Hiroko pressed. “Tell Mama.”
“I don’t want to be pregnant anymore.” Viktor closed his eyes miserably. “I can’t get comfortable. I haven’t slept in days. I’m hot and tired and miserable and I’m not even allowed in the onsen! It’s not fair!”
“I thought you liked being pregnant,” Hiroko teased while she shifted her hand back to Viktor’s slightly blotchy face and began to run her finger across his features: across his forehead, down his nose, around each eye, trace the outside of his lips, swirls around each slightly rounded cheek, and then back up to his forehead to repeat.
“I thought so, too!”
Viktor had been beyond delighted the first few weeks of his pregnancy. It had been smooth sailing for a little while after the morning sickness passed: Viktor had been glowing and sticking his stomach out to maximize the slight swell with pride. And then he started to gain even more weight and even more pregnancy symptoms began: the weight made his back hurt, heartburn was now inescapable no matter what he ate, and finding any comfortable way to sit or stand or sleep was impossible.
“I’m tired,” Viktor whispered. “I’m so, so tired.”
“See if you can rest for a bit,” Hiroko encouraged. “I’ll stay right here with you.”
One leg was already to fall asleep from where Viktor was listing to one side and leaning against her, but Hiroko couldn’t blame Viktor: he was having a truly miserable pregnancy.
Viktor’s food poisoning turned I’m-actually-pregnant! was a surprise to say the least. Viktor had thought years of overly powerful birth control to stop his heats entirely and correct his overproduction of slick had ruined any chances of reproduction. Yuuri had thought years of pills to regulate his ruts and keep his aggression in check had left him with a lower than average chance of fathering any children. And even though he was an omega, Viktor was a male one at that, which didn’t help the odds. Mixed with the fact that Viktor was slowly creeping toward forty, no one thought that pregnancy was an option. Neither Viktor nor Yuuri had been bothered by the fact they were married and infertile: there were plenty of options to consider if they ever wanted children.
But then Viktor had started puking at random intervals, losing weight, and having severe mood swings that left more than a few people, Viktor included, in tears. A single trip to the doctor and one blood test later, and Viktor had his diagnosis: pregnant. Congratulations!
“Mom?”
Hiroko shushed Yuuri loudly when he poked head into Viktor’s room. “Vi-chan’s sleeping! Quiet!”
It had only been an hour or so, but Hiroko’s palm and fingers were tingling from the constant rubbing against the cloth of Viktor’s robe. Her other hand hadn’t left his face: she had her hand on his forehead. Viktor hadn’t moved once except to shift his head against her shoulder and tip his chin against his chest when he began to doze.
Yuuri pulled his phone from his pocket, immediately put it on silent, and then opened a blank note application and began typing away. He sat himself beside his mother and Viktor and then offered his phone.
What’s wrong?
Hiroko just smiled and reached the hand which had been on Viktor’s face out.
He’s uncomfortable.
Yuuri’s face betrayed his reaction: that wasn’t new. Viktor had been very vocal for months about how difficult being pregnant actually was.
He said he was tired and the baby was moving around. Hiroko continued to tap away. He was sobbing. I wanted to see if I could help. He fell asleep.
Yuuri nodded as he looked over the screen and then at Viktor’s face. Sleep had become rather elusive no matter how much Viktor needed it. If he was lucky, he could doze off for twenty or so minutes at a time before the baby would shift and wake him up or the heartburn would begin. Yuuri had tried helping arrange pillows under Viktor’s belly and between his legs and rubbing his stomach to keep the baby quiet, but nothing worked. Not for long, anyways, and never enough for Viktor to get more than few minutes of actual rest.
How long have you been like this?
Just an hour or so. Hiroko continued to rub soothing circles against Viktor’s stomach. I didn’t have the heart to wake him up or try to move him. He was very upset, Yuuri. He said he didn’t want to be pregnant anymore.
Yuuri nodded once and ignored how his pulse quickened. Do I need make another appointment?
Viktor had complained about the almost weekly checkups, but given all his risk factors, the doctors insisted it was better to be safe than sorry. Yuuri was more worried about the mental stress than the physical discomfort at this point: it broke his heart to see Viktor uncomfortable, but it made him even more anxious to hear Viktor snapping at his stomach and wishing that he had never gotten pregnant in the first place.
He was just a bit upset. Hiroko quickly added a smiley face. He’s pregnant, Yuuri, he’s having mood swings. He doesn’t really mean it. He loves your baby.
Yuuri shrugged. Everyone, doctors, family, friends, had said Viktor didn’t really mean anything he said. It was just the hormones and his way of venting. But that didn’t make some of Viktor’s comments any less alarming. Abortion had been one of the first options offered if Viktor didn’t want to be pregnant. Adoption if Viktor was alright being pregnant but didn’t want the baby. Yuuri knew that Viktor had very carefully considered each choice before deciding. But, as Viktor had learned, deciding to remain pregnant and have the baby was much easier said than done.
He’s just frustrated. Hiroko motioned for Yuuri to slide closer. He did. He’s having a miserable pregnancy. I may have made some unkind comments to you and Mari when you two were particularly antsy and all I wanted to do was sleep.
Yuuri smiled a bit.
Hiroko handed him his phone and then did her best to lean over and kiss his head. “You’re going to be wonderful parents,” she whispered.
Yuuri froze. “I’m going to get you and Viktor some water. I’ll be right back.”
Hiroko nodded: despite the water bottles spread out in the room, once he had begun to show, Viktor only drank ice water. It was some odd quirk that Viktor couldn’t explain except for the fact he felt like he was running a fever all the time due to the increased blood flow in his body.
Yuuri got up and headed for the kitchen. He made sure all the ice trays and little machine in the freezer were full before detouring to the nearest door and stepping out and grabbing an oversized sweatshirt hung by the door.
Yuuri couldn’t remember when Mari had started smoking, young, he recalled, and that even when he had been legally old enough to purchase cigarettes himself, Mari had never given him one. Never.
“It’s a nasty habit,” she had commented. “And you’re an athlete. I don’t even want to give you a taste. It’s bad enough you sit out here while I smoke.”
Mari smoked far less now, but Yuuri could still remember where all her secret stashes for her packs were. He pulled on the sweatshirt, removed a loose brick, and then tapped out a single cigarette from the pack. Yuuri had never thought he’d be the type of person to carry a lighter, (that was definitely Yurio’s territory and it was only in case birthday candles needed to be lit) but here he was. Yuuri wanted to laugh: the lighter had been a souvenir from Russia, a gag gift from Viktor since Yuuri technically had citizenship and Viktor had joked how much Yuuri would miss their homeland since he and Viktor planned on spending the entire duration of Viktor’s pregnancy and months after the birth in Japan. A tiny picture of Saint Basil’s Cathedral decorated the side of the lighter, and Yuuri broke the perfect picture as he flicked open the lighter.
He knew taking up smoking after finding out that his husband was pregnant was beyond stupid, that he never should have started in the first place, but Yuuri had been hitting his “take as needed” anxiety medication hard. To support Viktor, Yuuri had given up everything Viktor had, which meant sake, sushi (or at least anything with raw fish), and the onsen. Viktor had been heartbroken when he found out most of his favorite foods and pastimes were now dangerous: he knew alcohol and too much fish were out, but apparently the thought of overheating in the onsen and possibly hurting his baby had never come to mind.
Yuuri had promised to give up everything Viktor did in a show or support, but as the months had passed and Viktor had started filling out, the fact that he and Viktor were going to be parents finally began to sink in. Yuuri needed something to take the edge off, just one little vice, and while smoking was probably the unhealthiest thing he could have started, (aside from illegal drugs) Yuuri felt only slightly guilty about it. He never smoked around Viktor. Never in the vicinity, and Yuuri hoped that the old sweatshirt he wore would absorb most of the smoke. No one had made a comment yet which meant Yuuri either had a secret all his very own, or no one had called him out on it. Yet. Yuuri knew he would have to stop at some point. Before the baby came. But for now, it was a guilty pleasure, one cigarette every few days or so just to try and help take the edge off his anxiety. Yuuri didn’t know if it was helping or not, but he could still hear Celestino’s voice warning him and Phichit them the first day they had met that he wouldn’t coach them if they started smoking: it was a horrible habit and would ruin their lungs.
Viktor was awake when Yuuri returned from his smoke break. Viktor and Hiroko had shifted a bit and Viktor was awkwardly spread across her lap on his side, head on her leg while she continued to rub his stomach and pet his hair. Viktor still looked sleepy, and Yuuri offered a glass of ice water.
“Hi,” he greeted softly. “Have a nice nap?”
Viktor just blinked and took the water. He drained all of it in one go and then closed his eyes.
“He’s still waking up,” Hiroko supplied while she put her own offered glass aside and then felt Viktor’s forehead. “Yuuri, does he feel warm to you?”
Yuuri felt and then nodded. “A bit.” He reached a hand out to touch Viktor’s stomach. “Viktor, do you feel alright?”
Viktor was quiet for a few seconds before shaking his head. Both Hiroko and Yuuri tensed before Viktor spoke.
“I don’t know how I feel anymore.” Which translated to he didn’t know what was considered normal pregnancy pains and what wasn’t. What was just discomfort and what was an actual emergency. “I’m tired.”
Hiroko and Yuuri exchanged worried glances.
“Viktor, I’m going to call and make an appointment,” Yuuri said.
Viktor groaned. “They’re just going to take more blood.”
“It’s for the best, Vi-chan,” Hiroko comforted while Yuuri got down low on the floor so that he could lean his head against Viktor’s and coo to him. “You’re having a rough enough pregnancy as is and we want to be extra careful. You’re-”
Viktor growled and sat up. “High risk, I know! I know! I know!” One foot banged angrily against the floor.
Both Hiroko and Yuuri startled at the sudden noise and Viktor’s outburst.
“It’s not my fault!” Viktor continued. “I didn’t even mean to get pregnant in the first place!” He bit his lip, pushed himself to his knees with a groan, and then smacked Yuuri’s hands away when he tried to help him stand. He hissed at Hiroko when she also tried to help him up, and he wobbled unsteadily on his feet for a few seconds before tottering a few steps and regaining his balance. “Just leave me alone!”
The room they were in wasn’t really even Viktor’s room: it was a private room on the ground level that was close enough to the main area of Yu-topia that if Viktor shouted for help he could easily be heard, but also far enough away from everything that Viktor could have peace and quiet and a space for himself. Viktor felt smothered in his and Yuuri’s actual bedroom, and this was much easier for everyone: Viktor had unlimited access to the kitchen and everyone could keep an eye on him without being a nuisance.
“He’s having a mood swing,” Hiroko comforted while she reached out and then pulled Yuuri against her front. “You’re a good mate, Yuuri.”
“It doesn’t feel like it,” Yuuri admitted tearfully.
“He said he wants to be alone: leave him alone for a little while.” Hiroko began stroking Yuuri’s hair. “He’s just cranky, he doesn’t mean anything. You’re doing everything you can, Yuuri. He’s just uncomfortable and there’s nothing anyone can do to help. Poor Nishigori got his head chewed out every other day with poor Yuuko.” Hiroko laughed. “Triplets.”
Yuuri’s stomach clenched and he moaned. The prospect of having more than one baby…
“Hush, hush Yuuri, it’s alright. You’re only getting one surprise. You’ve been to all the ultrasound appointments, you’re only having one baby.”
It took a few minutes for Yuuri to calm down. “Was Yuuko this miserable?” he dared to ask.
Hiroko hummed. “More or less. Carrying triplets wasn’t easy, but Yuuko probably still had it easier than Viktor does.” She sighed a bit. “Yuuri, Viktor might an omega, but that doesn’t mean he’s designed to have kids.”
Yuuri grabbed onto his mother’s sleeve. “I know.”
There had been conversations about narrow hips and C-sections: just because Viktor could have kids didn’t mean he should.
“But Vi-chan is strong and stubborn,” Hiroko added with a laugh. “He just likes to complain and make everyone him as miserable as he is.”
Yuuri nodded. “I’ll go call the doctor.”
“Vi-chan, how did the appointment go?”
Toshiya was just as involved as Hiroko as a grandparent-to-be. He had been eagerly awaiting Viktor and Yuuri’s return from their late afternoon doctor’s visit and already had melon cut and chilled for Viktor no matter the outcome.
Viktor just brushed past him, lower lip wobbling, and didn’t reply. Yuuri held his hands up in apology and mouthed “later” before hurrying after Viktor and his adorable waddle. Toshiya trailed after the pair, undeterred.
“I have melon,” he offered. “Enough for Viktor and the baby.”
The first container was gone in minutes. Viktor looked at Yuuri, dared him to say something, but Yuuri remained silent. He waited for Viktor’s mouth to be full before speaking.
“Viktor’s blood pressure is a little high,” Yuri said lightly.
Viktor chewed and ducked his head; he had never cried so much in his life since becoming pregnant. The simplest thing set him off, and no matter how silly the reason, Viktor couldn’t convince himself to stop.
“Oh, Vi-chan, don’t cry.”
Viktor pushed the bowl of half-finished melon aside and put his face in his hands while Toshiya draped an arm around his shoulders and a put a hand on his belly.
“It’s not your fault. Don’t cry.”
“The doctor wants him on bedrest for a few weeks to see if that helps,” Yuuri continued cheerfully despite Viktor’s quiet hiccupping sobs.
“Oh, Vi-chan… Don’t cry, don’t cry. It’s alright.”
“It’s not!” Viktor buried his face against Toshiya’s neck. “I’m a horrible parent and I haven’t even held my baby yet! I’m horrible!”
“No, no you’re not.” Toshiya made shooing motions at Yuuri; Yuuri quickly got a glass of ice water. “You’re a lovely parent already, Vi-chan.”
“I have high blood pressure!”
“It’s not that bad,” Yuuri interrupted before forcing the glass to Viktor’s lips. “It’s only slightly elevated. Drink.”
Viktor drank a few sips and then laced his hands beneath his belly to try and ease the pressure on his back. “I’m tired,” he bit out bitterly. “I want a nap.”
“You can go sleep right now,” Toshiya encouraged. “Come on, I’ll help you to your room.”
“I don’t need help!”
Hiroko and Toshiya seemed totally unaffected by Viktor’s sometimes cruel outbursts and mood swings. Yuuri had no idea how they did it: Viktor had left Yuuri in tears quite a few times.
“Of course you don’t,” Toshiya corrected quickly. “I just meant that I could sit with you for a bit if you’d like.”
Viktor considered the offer. Hiroko had the magic touch, but Toshiya came in close second. “Rub my belly?” he asked slowly.
The doctor’s appointment had riled up the baby. Yuuri had tried rubbing circles on Viktor’s stomach, but apparently Yuuri had only succeeded in making the baby more excited: Viktor had a hunch that the baby knew when its father was paying it attention.
“Whatever you’d like, Vi-chan.”
“Rub my belly.” It was more a command than anything, although Hiroko and Toshiya seemed more than happy to comply with Viktor’s demands.
“Let’s finish your melon first, unless you want to bring some with you?” Toshiya offered. “You could lay down and have some then take a nap.”
Viktor wiped his eyes and smiled. “I like that.”
“Yuuri, you’ll grab some of the melon, won’t you?” Toshiya was already helping Viktor to his feet. “Come on, Vi-chan, let’s go get you as comfortable as possible.”
Getting Viktor to the floor was a task in and of itself, and once Viktor was down, he wasn’t inclined to get back up: he was simply too big and unbalanced.
“… one here, maybe one there… this one for your back… how is that?”
Viktor beamed when Toshiya finished adjusting his pillows. A fan was already on to help keep Viktor cool, and Viktor had his bowl of chilled melon by his elbow. Yuuri was already reclining beside him, more of a watcher and helper than active participant, but Viktor seemed most inclined to listen to their parents rather than Yuuri. Toshiya joined them on the floor, and both hands immediately went to Viktor’s stomach and began to rub.
“Good?” he asked.
Viktor nodded once and began popping pieces of melon into his mouth. Yuuri just blinked: he hadn’t seen Viktor in such a good mood in weeks.
“You eat that and get comfy. Yuuri and I will be right here if you need anything.”
As much as Viktor demanded be left alone, Yuuri knew it was mostly a façade: Viktor was terrified of being left alone and having anything happen to the baby.
It took only minutes for the baby to stop shifting and quiet down. Viktor’s eating slowed soon after that, and then he began to doze. Yuuri forced him to lean against the large body pillows, and then, gradually, Viktor began to nod off.
Doctor appointments were always exhausting and fairly traumatizing for Viktor: the necessary but invasive questions never stopped, and Viktor had never been poked and prodded so much in his life, not even after bad falls skating when he had been competitive. Yuuri was little better after the visits: emotionally he was exhausted, always more stressed out even if the appointment only yielded good news, and worried about making sure Viktor could quietly recover. Both of them dreaded doctor appointments. More than a few people had pointed out that wasn’t healthy. Yuuri just shrugged because he knew getting worked up didn’t help anyone, but he also couldn’t help how he felt.
“Yuuri, you should rest, too.”
Yuuri picked his head up from where he had been leaning it on Viktor’s shoulder. “Eh? Me?”
Toshiya nodded. “You.”
Yuuri frowned: he wasn’t pregnant, got six to eight hours of uninterrupted sleep every night, and hadn’t just had blood drawn and been examined. “Me?” he repeated.
“Yes, you.”
Viktor frowned a bit in his sleep and shifted minutely. Toshiya dropped his voice even further and then reached a hand out to touch Yuuri’s face.
“I know you’re putting on a brave face, Yuuri. I know you’re worried.”
Yuuri didn’t even get the chance to reply.
“That’s perfectly normal. I was terrified when I found out I was going to be a father!”
Yuuri frowned when his father took his glasses off and set them carefully aside.
“Everyone is so focused on Vi-chan, understandably so, but no one’s forgotten about you. You shouldn’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it.”
“Help?” Yuuri parroted in confusion. “You and Mom and everyone have been amazing to Viktor! Thank you!”
Hiroko and Yuuko’s insight had done more to calm Viktor (and Yuuri) than anyone could understand. There were no embarrassing questions or fears too mundane. The pair had assured Viktor that everything he was thinking and feeling was valid, and especially as a first-time mother, there was a learning curve that was best accomplished with people who had already gone through what he was experiencing.
Viktor began to snore. Toshiya tipped Viktor’s head ever so slightly one way and the snoring stopped.
“Yuuri, I’m not talking about Viktor getting help, I’m talking about you. You can ask for help, if you need it.”
“I don’t need any help?” Yuuri replied slowly, unsurely. “Why would I need any help?” He laughed a bit. “I’m not the one who’s pregnant!” He looked at Viktor fondly: even without his glasses and being slightly blurry, Viktor was still gorgeous.
“Yuuri.” And there was a tone of voice Yuuri rarely heard from his father. “Why won’t we go talk?”
“But Viktor-”
“He’s fast asleep. He’ll be fine for a few minutes.”
“But the baby-”
“Should be just as tired as Viktor.” Toshiya held both his hands up with a smile. “Baby hasn’t moved since I’ve stopped rubbing. They’ll both be fine while we go talk for a bit.”
Yuuri felt a bit strange accepting a hand up from his father, but he took it. Yuuri closed the door to Viktor’s room and then felt the sudden urge to go smoke. Viktor and the baby were alright, for now, and the problem with Viktor’s high blood pressure wasn’t quite a problem yet: the bedrest was just a precaution.
“Why don’t we go outside?” Toshiya suggested lightly.
Yuuri should have known better when Toshiya led them both outside to a spot where Yuuri usually smoked. Yuuri resisted the usual routine of grabbing his sweatshirt and heading for his hidey hole.
“You can smoke, I don’t mind,” Toshiya said cheerily.
Yuuri took a step toward where he kept a pack hidden and then froze. “Shit.”
Of course his father knew. His mother probably did, too, and both had probably been too kind to mention the habit.
“I don’t mind,” Toshiya repeated. “You can smoke.”
Yuuri hesitated and then went for the pack. He tapped one out, lit it, and Toshiya waited for the first cigarette to whittle down to almost nothing before Yuuri held another whole one up and began chain smoking. Yuuri sat himself on the ground, back against the nearest wall, and let one hand dangle between his knees. He still didn’t have his glasses on, but he watched the smoke curl up from his cigarette guiltily. He knew his father was going to talk with him, but about what, he didn’t know. Probably his smoking habit given where Toshiya had taken them.
“Better?” Toshiya asked.
Yuuri shrugged. “A little.”
“This a new habit?” There was no judgement, not sharpness to Toshiya’s words, just simple curiosity.
“Once I found out Viktor was pregnant… I just… I needed…” Yuuri took a long drag. “My anxiety medication wasn’t enough. I thought this might help.”
“Did you talk with your doctor?”
Yuuri flicked a few ashes. “I never felt like I had the time to go ask to get my prescription changed.”
“Oh, Yuuri…”
Yuuri winced when Toshiya sat down beside him on the ground. He held his hand out. Yuuri offered the lighter and cigarettes.
“Why didn’t you tell anyone?” Toshiya asked.
Yuuri shrugged again. “Viktor and the baby are more important. I just thought this would get easier. Being a dad. Becoming one. It… hasn’t.”
“You should have told someone, Yuuri. Becoming a parent is scary. Some anxiety is to be expected, but Yuuri…”
“I know. I know. I just… Viktor is more important.”
“You’re important, too.”
“Viktor and the baby are more important.” Yuuri paused to take a short drag. “Viktor’s already high risk, I didn’t need to add to his worries with something as silly as me being nervous about becoming a dad.” He smiled a bit.
“Mhm hm.”
Yuuri balked when Toshiya tapped out a single cigarette, fumbled with the lighter for a few clicks, and then lit it.
“Dad!”
Yuuri knew that his father, at least years ago, could get more than a little wild if he drank. But smoking had never even crossed Yuuri’s mind. Never.
“You thought I’d never come out here to smoke with Mari?” Toshiya teased.
He coughed a bit on his first drag. Yuuri patted his back.
“You’re going to quit, right?”
Yuuri’s second cigarette was almost gone. “Before the baby comes.”
“That only leaves you a bit over a month to indulge,” Toshiya noted.
“I should have never started in the first place.” Yuuri bowed his head and rested his elbows on his knees.
“I’m just happy you started after you finished figure skating.”
“Please don’t tell Mom.”
“Mom already knows.”
Yuuri winced. “Please don’t tell Viktor.”
“He won’t hear it from me.”
Yuuri finished his cigarette and then watched and waited for his father to finish his.
“Yuuri, you need to call your doctor,” Toshiya said while he eyed Yuuri. “I don’t want to scare you, but this is the easy part of becoming a father. Imagine how much harder everything is going to be once you actually have your baby out in the world.”
Yuuri shook his head. Hs chest suddenly felt tight. Toshiya shifted a bit closer.
“But you have me, and Mom, and Yuuko and Nishigori are here and had triplets their first time around. And Minako is dying to have another baby around to spoil. And Mari doesn’t say it much, but she’s very excited to become an aunt. We’ll give you all the help you and Viktor need, but you may need to ask for it. Alright? We’re not mind readers.”
“Alright.”
“Let’s go see if Vi-chan is still sleeping.”
“And in. And hold. Focus on your core muscles.”
Yuri made a face at the sight before him. “Did everyone join a baby cult?” he asked. “And can I not join it?”
“Yurio!”
“God, Viktor, don’t try and get up. You’re like what, twelve months pregnant?” Yuri demanded as he hurried into the room before Viktor could even attempt to get up.
“Eight!” came the reply. “Yurio, come do yoga with us!”
“Is that allowed?” Yuri asked Yuuri before looking to Hiroko and Yuuko. “Are pregnant people allowed to do yoga?”
“Prenatal yoga,” Yuuri supplied with a little smile. “It’s actually encouraged. It’s supposed to help with some of the aches and pains of being pregnant and help prepare for labor.”
Yurio frowned. “Then why the hell is everyone else doing it when Viktor is the only pregnant one?”
“Moral support!” Yuuko chimed. “I had so much fun when I was pregnant, and it was so nice having someone come with me.”
“Er… nice.” Yurio got down on the floor. “So, uh, what are doing?”
“Just warming up.” Yuuko seemed to be leading the class. “We’re just doing some simple poses and breathing exercises.”
Getting Viktor up for the actual yoga was a task, but once Viktor was up, he was up. Yurio began to snicker behind his hand.
“What?” Viktor asked while Yuuri kept a firm hand on his hip just in just he got dizzy.
“You’re huge!” Yurio said. “You’re sure you’re not having triplets?”
Viktor flushed and looked at the floor.
“He’s perfect,” Hiroko chirped. “He’s a male omega: they tend to round out a bit more.”
“You’re beautiful,” Yuuri whispered before nuzzling the side of Viktor’s face until he cracked a grin. “If you weren’t so uncomfortable, I’d keep you like this all the time.”
“Ew, gross!” Yurio steeped away from the pair. “Keep that in the bedroom!”
Yuuko clapped her hands. “Let’s keep focused. We’ll start off simple: arms above our heads. Straight up, think tall, breathe, and stretch.”
Yurio found himself more interested in watching Yuuri and Viktor interact than actually participating. Yuuri was as close to Viktor as possible without impending either of their movements, and whenever they shifted, Yuuri always hesitated to make sure Viktor was alright before slipping into whatever pose was next.
“Viktor, you’re pregnant,” Yuuko said with a laugh. “Really, really pregnant. Don’t feel pressured to do anything if it’s uncomfortable for you. This is supposed to be calming and empowering and peaceful.”
Viktor nodded once. “Right.”
“We’re going to squat.”
“Eh?” Yuuri seemed more alarmed than Viktor.
Yuri nodded at Yuuri and offered a thumbs up. “I’m surprised the old man is still this flexible,” he noted, clearly impressed by how far Viktor was able to stretch and pose despite his massive belly. “You two must have some really kinky sex. Super kinky pregnancy sex.”
Hiroko and Toshiya giggled and laughed. Yuuri fixed Yuri with a smirk.
“We did. Viktor was nonstop sex the first few months.”
And then they started getting more creative with positions when the weight started to impede. And then even the simplest positions became uncomfortable, impossible, and Viktor couldn’t muster up the energy to even try. Yuuri was definitely sexually frustrated, but it wasn’t like he could ask his pregnant spouse, who was still gaining weight, to drop down on his knees. So, instead, Yuuri sat Viktor down at the edge of their bed and dropped down to his knees: they didn’t both need to be horny and miserable, and Yuuri had never been so grateful for Yuuko’s reminder that oral sex was always possible.
“It was fun!” Viktor said. “Poor Yuuri couldn’t keep up with me!”
Yuri let out a low whistle. “Wow, beating Katsudon at his own stamina game?”
“I wore him out.” Viktor reached over to pinch Yuuri’s cheek. “He cried.”
“Only a little.” Yuuri grabbed Viktor’s cheek and smiled at him. “You cried when I ate you out last week.”
“Yuuri, your father is in the room!” Hiroko tutted. “Keep it clean!”
“More poses!” Yuuko interrupted loudly.
Viktor enjoyed teatime with Yuuko and Hiroko: Viktor had started calling it “teatime for pregnant persons only” just to keep Yuuri away. He enjoyed that Yuuri wanted to learn as much as he could and was willing to hear the nitty gritty, but Viktor thought it was best of he got to decide what Yuuri actually got to hear: he didn’t want to make Yuuri any more anxious than he already was. Viktor had already been scared senseless by doctors and too much internet searching: Yuuri had to spend almost two hours trying to calm Viktor down after he had read too many delivery room horror stories. He had eventually gone for Hiroko as a last ditch effort before he decided to call the doctor.
“Oh, Vi-chan, don’t read all that,” Hiroko had said while she hugged Viktor and rubbed his back. “It’s too scary. None of that will happen to you.”
“But it could!” Viktor had pointed out.
“You don’t know that. Worrying about it won’t help anyone.”
Viktor put his tea aside and leaned his head against the table with a low moan.
“Something wrong?” Yuuko asked kindly.
Viktor couldn’t think of the translation for, “my boobs hurt.” He settled on sitting up and making vague cupping motions by his chest. “I’m sore.”
Yuuko nodded in sympathy. “Triplets,” she said with a sigh. “I didn’t think my boobs would ever be the same after them.”
Hiroko hummed and nodded. Viktor just put his arms on the table and leaned his head on them miserably. He knew being pregnant meant a big belly, but he had almost desperately been hoping that he’d be one of those male omegas who didn’t balloon anywhere else. It wasn’t that breastfeeding didn’t appeal to him, some innermost maternal instinct liked the idea of providing for his baby, but Viktor had almost slapped Yuuri across the face the first time they had starting making out and Yuuri’s hands had wandered to his nipples. And that had been years before Viktor had gotten pregnant and suddenly became overly sensitive: he didn’t like Yuuri, his beloved alpha and loving husband, even touching his chest, how would Viktor ever be able to deal with nursing a baby a dozen times a day without losing his mind? There was still a chance that all the swelling was for nothing and once the baby was born, lactation wouldn’t happen. Viktor could hope.
“Any more questions, Vi-chan?” Hiroko said while she refilled cups. “It’s almost time!”
Viktor’s due date was just two weeks away and he was more miserable than ever. He was constantly hot, his back hurt, and he had even admitted that he was extremely short-tempered mostly due to how uncomfortable he was. That, and any relief he found was always only temporary. It was a nightmare.
Viktor turned his head to the side with a slight snarl. He felt awful. “Am I really going to shit myself when I give birth?” he asked hotly.
Yuuko wasn’t quite prepared for that sort of question, or at least the wording of it: she grabbed a napkin to dab at her nose and tea she had inhaled up it. Hiroko took the question much more gracefully: she just nearly dropped her cup, quickly adjusted her hold, and smiled at Viktor.
“It’s possible,” she admitted. “But you might have a C-section instead and not have to worry about that.”
Viktor just frowned. Hiroko could already see cranky-Viktor transition to grouchy-Viktor. “So I either get to shit myself or get ripped open and spend six weeks recovering from major surgery. Great.”
Hiroko had learned (and told everyone) that is was best to let Viktor vent and let him have his way: pregnancy could be miserable for anyone, and especially as a male omega shaped as he was, Viktor wasn’t meant to carry babies. He was probably constantly uncomfortable, if not in downright pain. Fighting with him and his unpredictable hormones would only make everything worse.
“Let’s not worry about what’s going to happen,” Yuuko said lightly once she had blown her nose. “Whatever happens, happens, Viktor. Everyone, even the doctors, thought I was going to have to have a C-section, but I didn’t.”
There had already been discussions that Viktor would be allowed to labor as long as he wanted, if he wanted to, so long as there were no dangers for him or the baby.
Viktor sneered a bit. He shifted both hands from the table to his stomach: he was clearly in a vindictive mood. “Did you shit yourself?”
Yuuko just smiled at Viktor and nodded without shame. “Yup.”
Viktor was quite possibly too thankful to demand Hiroko answer his question, but Hiroko sipped at her tea and replied evenly. “I didn’t know until after I had Mari and Yuuri. I was too distracted to even notice. Don’t be embarrassed if it happens, Vi-chan.”
“I’ll punch anyone who teases you,” Yuuko promised.
Viktor smiled faintly. “Thank you. That means so much.”
After a few weeks of Viktor getting in and out of bed numerous times a night for either the bathroom or to pace a bit, Yuuri had learned to sleep through it. The constant ups and downs and rolling over and blankets being flipped back or tugged back into place didn’t wake Yuuri. Yuuri felt guilty: his sleep hadn’t suffered with the pregnancy. Viktor’s did. Yuuri had sworn that every late night baby need would be his job, that as soon as the baby was born, Viktor would get to sleep for a week straight.
Yuuri sat up, blinked, and then began pawing around for his glasses. Viktor’s side of the bed was empty. Yuuri was normally immune to Viktor’s comings and goings: what had woken him? Yuuri got up, took one step into the hall, and found out why. Viktor had both arms braced against the wall and was bent over at the waist. His head was bowed, and Yuuri’s heart broke when Viktor shifted a bit on his feet and let out a quiet moan.
“Viktor?”
Viktor lifted his head and looked at Yuuri. He sniffled a bit. “Yuuri.” It came out as a whimper.
“What’s wrong?” Yuuri asked.
“I didn’t meant to wake you,” Viktor apologized.
“I don’t care.” Yuuri put his hand on Viktor’s shoulder. “What’s wrong?”
“My back hurts.” Viktor leaned against his arms again. “I just wanted to walk a bit.”
“Viktor…” Yuuri hesitated. Viktor’s due date was days away. He could, according to his last doctor’s appointment, go into labor at any time. “You’re alright?” He didn’t want to suggest labor: Viktor had panicked when the Braxton Hicks contracts had first started weeks ago.
Viktor shook his head. “My back hurts. They feel like cramps.” He hadn’t had a heat in decades, but he could still remember his first few and the cramps and the terrible amounts of slick. There was nothing like cramps: the slow build of pain, brief relief, and then more pain.
“Want to walk a bit?” Yuuri suggested. “I’ll walk with you.”
Viktor nodded. Yuuri put his arm around Viktor’s waist to help support him and then he let Viktor lead the way. They walked the entire interior of Yu-topia, detoured outside it, and then left the property. Viktor, who would have normally stopped to take in the sunrise, ignored it entirely and instead focused on walking and breathing.
By the time the pair returned to Yu-topia, Viktor admitted that his cramps were probably contractions. Actual contractions and that he was probably in actual labor since they were getting stronger and slowly closer together. Yuuri almost left Viktor at the door to grab their hospital bag and wake their parents, but leaving his laboring mate all alone didn’t seem like a good idea: Yuuri walked Viktor all to Hiroko and Toshiya’s room to wake them instead of shouting.
“Isn’t this exciting?” Hiroko asked while she slowly walked Viktor down the hall while Yuuri and Toshiya went to grab bags.
Viktor shook his head, paused to lean against a wall when another contraction hit, and then sniffled. “I’m scared!”
Hiroko just nodded. “I know, Vi-chan. First babies are always the worst: you don’t know what to expect.”
Viktor bristled. “First? I’m not having another one!” That seemed to motivate him enough to keep walking. “I’ll kill Yuuri if he so much as thinks about getting me pregnant again!”
“That’s the spirit.”
Viktor actually growled. “We’re both getting everything tied and snipped and I’m never getting like this ever again!”
Hiroko just nodded: at least Viktor was still breathing and moving, even if it was the pain talking and he was ranting.
Yuuri sprinted out of Yu-topia, bags in hand, and Viktor, sweaty and panting and pink in the face, fixed him with a look.
“You’re an asshole!” Viktor shouted.
Yuuri balked. “Eh?”
“This is all your fault!” Viktor continued. “I’m never having sex with you ever again if this is where it gets me!”
Things only went downhill once they got to the hospital. Yuuri had read every single (accredited) online article and book about pregnancy, fatherhood, and babies. He knew that labor would only intensify and get worse until the baby was born. That the mild cramps and contractions would get progressively more and more painful and there would be nothing Yuuri could do to help Viktor except try to comfort him and just support him and be there for him in his time of need. Yuuri knew he would feel helpless, and he didn’t like that.
Viktor paced at first. Did laps up and down the hallways, around the maternity ward, and then rode the elevator up and down because apparently that helped. He did that for hours while the contractions worsened, and then they got to the point where Viktor couldn’t walk. He wound up leaned against one of the walls while Yuuri held him and yelled for a nurse when Viktor started to try and sit down.
“None of that,” the nurse chided. “Back to bed, and no more walking.”
Viktor grew steadily quieter as the pain worsened. His sharp comments and endless stream of swear words lessened. He barked out short, quick, “yes” and “no” when asked questions, and then only managed panted fragments of words. Yuuri quickly filled in the blanks when needed: Viktor wanted help to get on all fours. He wanted more ice chips. He wanted Yuuri to hold his hand.
Hiroko and Toshiya were allowed a brief visit when Viktor asked for them.
“How is it going?” Hiroko asked worriedly while Viktor, on his hands and knees on the bed, dropped his face into a pillow to either rest or suffocate himself.
Yuuri grimaced. Things had only gone downhill: Viktor had almost kicked a doctor in the face when he hadn’t been woken up enough to be examined and the doctor had gone right for between Viktor’s legs. Viktor had almost bitten a nurse when she had tried to spoon-feed him pudding. Viktor had kicked a doctor in the face when the doctor and nurse had tried to “help” Viktor roll onto his back without asking.
“It’s… going,” Yuuri replied while Viktor yelled into the pillow. “He’s progressing.”
Over fifteen hours had passed, and while there was progress, it was slow going. Apparently that was normal for first babies and especially male omegas, but it wasn’t a comforting thought. Viktor already seemed spent, exhausted from the labor so far, and Yuuri had no idea how Viktor was expected to labor some more and then push.
Viktor turned his head to the side once he was done shouting. “I want it out,” he panted. “Now!”
Hiroko and Toshiya each kissed Viktor on the head, offered words of encouragement, and then left when Viktor began to vomit.
“Perfectly normal,” once nurse offered while she began to clean up the mess. “His body’s going through a lot right now. Maybe no more snacks, though.”
Viktor leaned against Yuuri’s shoulder, continued to whimper, and dug his heels against the bed.
“I. Want. It. Out. Now!”
Yuuri raised his free hand to brush back Viktor’s damp bangs and kiss his forehead. “Soon. You’re doing so well.”
Yuuri was glad he wasn’t keeping track of time: he couldn’t lie to Viktor when asked how long he had been laboring because Yuuri didn’t know. It could have easily been another fifteen hours, and doctors were starting to hint at a C-section: Viktor and the baby were fine to continue laboring for a few more hours, but if there wasn’t more progress, there wouldn’t be a choice. And then…
“It’s time!”
Viktor, red faced, breathing hard, and soaked in sweat, offered a single momentary, relieved smile at Yuuri, before moaning. He hadn’t screamed, not out loud, but quite a few noises, despite being muffled by a pillow of in a hand, had alarmed Yuuri.
“Ready to have a baby?”
Yuuri knew it was meant to be a good-natured comment, a joke. Viktor, despite being full term and this close to exhaustion, still found the energy to lunge and snarl.
“I’ve been ready for nine goddamn months! Get it out!”
Yuuri let a nurse carefully shift him into position. One hand for Viktor to squeeze and the other on Viktor’s foot to hold his leg. Viktor had his teeth grit and was struggling to follow a nurse’s instructions about breathing. This was it. A few more minutes, and the sonogram pictures and butterfly movements would be a real thing that Yuuri could see and hold.
Viktor was already shaking, and Yuuri could feel himself start to tremble. He leaned over and dropped his forehead against Viktor’s.
“This is it,” he said, torn between excitement and tears. “This is it!”
Viktor tilted his head slightly in response. He turned his face to kiss Yuuri on the mouth and then went back to panting.
“It’s a boy! Congratulations!”
The baby was the simultaneously the most beautiful and disgusting thing Yuuri had ever seen as it was set on Viktor’s chest, bodily fluids and all. He was squirming and crying and here. And judging by the lack of doctors descending on him, healthy.
“Viktor, he’s gorgeous,” Yuuri just managed to choke out through his tears as he tore his eyes from the newborn to look at Viktor and kiss him firmly on the mouth. He could feel Viktor’s lips trembling against his own. “Viktor?”
Viktor blinked and let go of the hands he had been holding in order to touch the squirming baby who was absolutely wailing against his front.
“Why don’t we go clean him up a bit?” one nurse suggested. “Then you can cuddle.”
Yuuri was torn between watching his baby being picked up and shifted away and Viktor. Viktor seemed to be having a hard time catching his breath and was still trembling from head to toe.
“Is he alright?” Yuuri demanded anxiously.
There were still people at the foot of bed and between Viktor’s legs. There was blood.
“The shaking is normal. His hormones are all over the place, it may take a few minutes or a few hours for it to stop. We’ll get him some warm blankets in a bit.”
“What about the blood?” Yuuri had known there was going to be blood, but it seemed like a lot.
“So long as it starts to slow, also normal.”
Viktor offered a halfhearted kicked when someone patted the inside of his knee.
“All nice and cleaned up,” one nurse said brightly as she came back with the baby. “Want to hold him?”
Viktor raised a shaking hand to try and push his hair away from his eye. His teeth were still chattering, and Yuuri watched him hold both arms out before letting them drop.
“I-I… can’t…”
The nurse didn’t seem deterred. “That’s fine, lots of mothers are shaky after all that hard work. He can just sit on you for a bit then. Dad can help hold him.”
Yuuri almost choked: dad. There had been jokes about it, teasing comments, but now he really was one.
“We like skin to skin contact,” the nurse continued. “Is that alright? Maybe you’d like to try feeding him?”
Viktor just blinked. “I…”
“We need you to push.”
Viktor turned his attention to the foot of the bed.
“This’ll be much easier than the baby. It’s just the placenta. One good push.”
“We’ll just move this aside, shift that a bit…” The nurse was already adjusting the front of Viktor’s gown. “Baby can sit right here and then maybe we can try-”
“Stop! Stop!”
The nurse, baby in her arms, took a step back when Viktor flailed both his arms before bringing them to his face.
“Stop! Stop!”
Yuuri hugged Viktor when he began to sob. “What’s wrong?” he asked calmly. “Viktor, what’s wrong?”
Viktor shook his head once. There were still people between his legs, asking him to push and muttering about stitches and blood and maybe getting some icepacks. The nurse beside him was still taking about skin to skin contact and bonding and making sure Viktor tried breastfeeding soon and how he could wait a bit if he wanted to, but really he should try now and…
“I just want to sleep,” Viktor choked out tearfully. “I just want to sleep. No more. Stop. Please”
Yuuri nodded. “He’s overwhelmed. Can we… take a break?”
“Once he delivers the placenta, he can rest,” someone offered kindly. “We’ll have to massage his stomach every half hour or so to make sure his uterus contracts-”
“Fine,” Yuuri interrupted. He let go of Viktor, pulled the chair beside the bed closer, and then sat down and whipped his shirt off before reaching across the bed and Viktor for his son. “I’ll hold him.”
The nurse hesitated and glanced at Viktor who still had his face in his hands and tears streaming down his splotchy face: he clearly had no interest in even looking at the baby he had worked so hard bringing into the world let alone trying to hold him.
“Well… alright.” The nurse walked around the bed. “You’ll want to hold him here, and support here…”
The tears slowed but the trembling did not. Viktor watched Yuuri hold their baby and felt nothing. Relief, yes, that he wasn’t in excruciating pain, but nothing else. Yuuri was still sniffling and grinning while he marveled over the baby, so beyond infatuated with the tiny little thing that Viktor wished he could at least feel some type of affection. But he didn’t. Not a thing. He admitted as much before bursting into tears.
“You’re in shock,” a nurse comforted while she tucked a warm blanket as best she could around Viktor to help ease some of the violent shivers. “You’re exhausted. You’ve been up for how many hours trying to push him out? You two will be fighting over who gets to hold him in no time. Your body needs to adjust. You’ve been through the ringer. Don’t beat yourself up.”
Viktor couldn’t sleep. Between the shakes, hands on his stomach trying to coax his innards to shrink which left him in tears, and suddenly ravenous newborn that had decided that he wasn’t going to finicky when it came to latching on, Viktor didn’t get a chance to do more than doze.
“Viktor, do you want visitors?” Yuuri whispered while he held their son who was now sleeping peacefully in his arms.
Viktor dragged his eyes open. His jaw ached from his teeth chattering, but maybe visitors would be nice? He nodded.
“It’s just our parents,” Yuuri said gently as he turned to a nurse to apparently give her permission to let Hiroko and Toshiya in.
Viktor offered a barest of smiles when the pair walked in. Their eyes went right to the bundle in Yuuri’s arms, but neither went to Yuuri. They detoured right to the bed and Viktor who was propped up, still blotchy, red eyed, and looked more than a little sick.
“You did it,” Toshiya praised before kissing Viktor’s cheek. “Congratulations.”
Hiroko quickly followed and began stroking back Viktor’s messy hair. “You did it, Vi-chan.”
“It’s a boy,” Viktor managed to whisper. “Go say hi?”
Yuuri offered the bundle for inspection. He didn’t seem keen on handing the baby over, but he did shift enough for both grandparents to get a good look at the sleeping infant.
“Perfect,” Hiroko said. “Do you have a name yet?”
Yuuri looked at Viktor, apparently waiting for him to reveal their decision. Viktor blinked a few times before replying. “Viyuu.”
It took almost three repeats of his alarm before Yuuri woke up. It took another two cycles for him to lift his head and then get out of bed and walk over to get his phone: he had learned that if he left it next to his bed, be would turn it off in his sleep and never wake up. If he had to get out of bed, that would be enough to wake him up and keep him awake.
Viyuu was stirring, making little unhappy noises at being woken up, and Yuuri reset the alarm on his phone, wandered back to bed for his glasses, and then headed for the crib.
“Good morning,” Yuuri greeted softly before scooping up the baby and settling him against his shoulder.
Viyuu squirmed, began to whimper, but Yuuri hoped he wouldn’t cry.
“I know, I know.” Yuuri turned on a lamp by the bed that had been set on the lowest possible setting: it was just enough to see by. “I don’t like getting up at… three in the morning either. But it’s better if we do this before you start to shriek.”
Yuuri glanced at Viktor: he was still asleep beneath the covers, oblivious. Yuuri cringed.
“Let’s change your diaper first and then you can eat, hm?”
Yuuri felt guilty waking Viktor up in the middle of the night. He was still exhausted and hadn’t been able to get that week Yuuri had promised him once the baby came. Apparently it would take a few weeks for Viktor’s body to adjust to being not pregnant, and a few shorter weeks for him to recover from childbirth. But, even though all the doctors suggested Viktor rest as much as possible and take it easy, Yuuri didn’t how Viktor was supposed to do that: every three to four hours, at the most five, Viyuu would start to cry. Yuuri could change his diaper or cuddle him if he wanted attention, but if Viyuu was hungry, Yuuri would have to go bother Viktor. He had gotten good at waking Viyuu up before the crying started, but he still needed to wake Viktor up, even if the omega had just nodded off.
Yuuri sat on the bed, baby held in one arm, and began running his fingers through Viktor’s hair. It was always better to try and wake Viktor up gently before resorting to more violent means, namely shaking his shoulder or letting Viyuu wail. Viktor didn’t stir, and Yuuri shifted his hand to the back of Viktor’s neck to rub.
“Viktor, wake up,” Yuuri called gently.
Viktor tensed and then began to move. Yuuri continued to rub his neck until Viktor rolled over and then sat himself up. He didn’t even bother to open his eyes: Yuuri already had pillows waiting, and Viktor began to blindly reach out and shift them into desired positions. Being woken up every few hours was miserable, and Viktor would be up for an extra half hour to an hour while Viyuu nursed. Yuuri had accidentally fallen back asleep more than once after Viktor had taken the baby, and Yuuri had demanded Viktor keep him awake, but Viktor had just shrugged: there was no point in Yuuri being awake if he didn’t need to be.
“Here.” Viktor held his arms out, dragged his eyes open, and then closed them again once Viyuu was handed over. “You can go back to sleep, Yuuri. He shouldn’t cry.”
Yuuri and Viktor had agreed to a feeding schedule: waking Viyuu up every few hours to nurse or change his diaper before he got cranky seemed to be working well, but that didn’t help either one of them catching up on sleep.
“No, I’ll stay up with you.” Yuuri did his best to smile: he desperately wanted to sleep, but it didn’t seem fair that Viktor had suffered through pregnancy and now had to keep suffering after.
Viktor didn’t reply. He was still shifting Viyuu and pillows into place while he stretched out on his side. Yuuri spooned up behind Viktor, kept one hand draped over Viktor’s hip, and then rested his chin on Viktor’s shoulder to watch. No matter what Viktor had wished for or hoped, Yuuri was just happy that Viyuu wasn’t fussy when it came time for nursing: Viktor only needed to make one or two minor adjustments and then he propped his chin up on his hand while his other arm curled about the baby.
“Viktor, are you awake?” Yuuri asked twenty minutes later.
Viktor had been nodding off, head dropping a few inches before Viktor caught himself.
“Viktor?”
Yuuri sat up and leaned over Viktor to look at him. Both eyes were closed, and even though Viktor still had his head propped up, he did seem to be fast asleep. Yuuri smiled, looked down at Viyuu who was still sucking without any sign of stopping, and then buried his face between Viktor’s shoulder blades with a quiet, contented sigh.
“Viktor, we have a perfect family,” he whispered.
Viktor didn’t reply.
The entire table looked up when the baby monitor, set to the side of Viktor’s water, began to scream. Viktor, who had finished his second helping of dinner, stared at the little walkie-talkie before putting his face in his hands.
“Viyuu has Yuuri’s stamina,” Hiroko said brightly. “I bet he could scream for hours if you let him.”
Viktor just shook his head, got to his feet, and then immediately sat back down. One hand went to the table to steady himself while the other splayed itself out on the ground.
“Vi-chan?” Toshiya asked with worry while Viktor began to sway.
“Just… a little lightheaded.” Viktor sounded winded.
“You just ate,” Hiroko pointed out nervously: Viktor’s appetite rivaled that of Viyuu’s. “You drank all your water.” He certainly wasn’t dehydrated. “Are you sick?”
Viktor shook his head a bit. Both eyes were tightly shut. Hiroko reached out to turn the monitor off.
“Vi-chan?”
Viktor laid himself down on his side.
“Vi-chan?” Toshiya prompted again.
Viktor sighed and all the tension in his body disappeared.
“Viktor!”
By the time Hiroko and Toshiya were next to Viktor on the floor, Viktor was already blinking himself awake.
“What happened?” he whispered as Hiroko pulled him onto her lap.
“You fainted.”
“Oh.” Viktor didn’t sound surprised.
“Viyuu can’t go to the hospital,” Toshiya said. “Too many germs. Yuuri can stay with him.”
Viktor shook his head. “I have to-”
“Yuuri can give him a bottle,” Hiroko said firmly.
Viktor bristled at the idea.
“Can you get up, Vi-chan? We need to go to the hospital.”
“Why?” Viktor didn’t to move. His head still felt fuzzy. “I’m just a little tired.”
“You had a baby not even three weeks ago: something could be wrong,” Toshoya added. “Let me go talk with Yuuri. You both stay here.”
Viktor heard Viyuu before he saw him. Yuuri immediately passed the crying baby over to Viyuu’s grandfather before getting on the floor and stroking Viktor’s hair.
“Viktor, you need a see a doctor,” he said gently. “Passing out is not normal, not after you just had a baby, not after you just had a full meal.”
Viktor looked at Viyuu who was still crying. “Viyuu’s hungry-”
“Viktor!” Yuuri snapped. “You just fainted, you’re going to the hospital!” That was definitely Yuuri’s alpha side showing. “No arguing!”
Viktor pushed himself up from Hiroko’s lap and locked eyes with Yuuri. “Not until after Viyuu’s been taken care of.”
Nursing could take almost an hour, but given how protective Viktor was steadily becoming over his son, Yuuri knew he wouldn’t be able to argue.
“Fine.”
Viktor sat up and reached out. Yuuri rolled his eyes.
“Not here, Viktor.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’re going to be stuck in the same position for an hour and it’s better if you’re comfortable. Let’s go to our room and get you settled.”
Viktor blacked out the second he got to his feet. Yuuri, who had been prepared for so much, grabbed Viktor about the waist and kept him upright.
“Our room,” Yuuri told his parents.
“But, Yuuri-”
“Viktor’s going to fight everyone if he doesn’t get to nurse Viyuu first.” Yuuri held a firm hold on Viktor when he began to stir. “As soon as they’re done, we’ll go to the hospital. Dad, you can stay here with Viyuu, he should sleep for a few hours once he’s done being fed. Mom, you can come with us since Viktor only listens to you when he gets in a mood.”
“Not in a mood,” Viktor grumbled.
“How was everything?” Yuuri asked.
Toshiya handed Viyuu back. “Fine. We slept, did some squirming, and slept some more. Viktor?”
“Just exhaustion,” Yuuri said while he cradled the newborn. “We’re going to try something else so that Viktor can sleep more.
Viktor, who was removing his hospital bracelet, pursed his lips. “Yuuri?” he prompted.
“So we can get more sleep,” Yuuri corrected. “The doctor, er, gave me a checkup. Apparently I’m borderline.”
Hiroko nodded. “We’re going to be parents again, Toshiya! For a few days,” she added hurriedly. “Vi-chan is going to pump and freeze so that we can take over baby duties and let these two rest.”
“You can see Viyuu whenever you want,” Hiroko promised while she held the baby and rocked him. “But you need to sleep, Vi-chan. Once you wake up, you can come visit.”
“We’re not taking him away from you,” Toshiya added. “Just watching him.”
“You’re sure you’ll be alright?” Yuuri asked: it was nice to see Viktor wanting to spend more time with Viyuu and bond with him, but the prospect of going to sleep and not having their baby in the same room was unnerving both of them.
“We did raise you and Mari, didn’t we?” Toshiya pointed out. “And you two turned out alright.”
Yuuri and Viktor were freshly fed, washed, and dressed in their pajamas. Yuuri felt like he and Viktor were led to prison as they stood in their room, saying good night to Viyuu and Viyuu’s grandparents.
“If you want to come see Viyuu when you wake up, we won’t be far,” Hiroko reminded. “But you two need to sleep more than a handful of hours.”
Yuuri and Viktor kissed Viyuu and then closed the door. The room was already dark, and Yuuri took his time removing his glasses, fluffing pillows, and then adjusting blankets. Viktor seemed just as restless, as reluctant to sleep without Viyuu in the room, and Yuuri curled around him, toed the inside of Viktor’s foot, and did his best to sound sexy.
“We can sleep as long as we like. No interruptions.”
“It feels wrong.”
“I know,” Yuuri agreed. “But doctor’s orders for both of us.”
It took some time for both of them to fall asleep. Yuuri woke up some fifteen hours later, disorientated, thirsty, and starving. He didn’t bother to wake Viktor, who slept for another six hours before getting up for the bathroom, a glass of water, and quick snack before promptly curling back up. Yuuri emerged, feeling fully rested, some off twenty-four hours after first going to bed. Vikor came out thirty-six hours later: Yuuri cried when he saw him.
“What’s wrong?” Viktor asked.
“You just… you look so much better.”
Viktor accepted Viyuu from Yuuri, rubbed noses with both husband and baby, and then smiled. “I feel much better.”