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Part 1 of One Last Time
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2017-10-10
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One Last Time

Summary:

When he's out jogging Tony Stark sees a familiar face on the other side of the street. As he walks closer to the dishevelled and broken man lying on a New York City kerb he just prays it isn't who he thinks it is. He prays it isn't his ex-boyfriend, Stephen Strange.

Notes:

I have been working on this fic for what feels like forever. I'm extremely nervous about posting it as it's the first time I've ever tried my hand at writing smut.

Thank you so much for clicking on my fic and I truly hope that you enjoy it.

Warnings: Brief mention of suicidal thoughts.

Work Text:

It was 7am on a cold Wednesday morning in January and Tony Stark was still regretting his decision to go for a morning jog. He had made a bet with Happy at Christmas that he could do an hour long run in Central Park every morning in January. It had only taken to January 2nd for Tony to hate his past self and wonder what the hell he’d been thinking on Christmas Day. This is why people bought treadmills, so you didn’t have to run in the cold at stupid o’clock in the morning. Tony just thought of the latte he’d have when he got back to his apartment and it was the only thing that got him through it. He was just exiting the park and looked across to the other side of the street when his morning changed completely. Tony froze when he saw him. It couldn’t be him… He was imagining it… He wasn’t… like this. It couldn’t be him. It just couldn’t be.

Sitting on the kerb on the other side of the street was a man looking shaggy, broken and alone. Tony took a deep breath and crossed the road and walked over to him. Tony was only a few feet away from him and the man hadn’t seen him yet. This wasn’t the man Tony used to know. This wasn’t the confident, suave intelligent doctor… It wasn’t him. It couldn’t be him. This man sitting on a kerb in New York with a used Starbucks cup with loose change lying the bottom wasn’t…. couldn’t be… Stephen Strange.

It was only when Tony was standing directly over him that the man finally noticed him and looked up. Any hope that Tony had that maybe just maybe this man wasn’t Stephen were dashed when the man finally looked up at him. There was no mistaking him. This man was definitely Stephen Strange.

Tony’s jaw dropped and he felt a sinking feeling in his chest. “Stephen… Stephen what happened?”

Stephen was speechless… Of all the people in New York who had to see him like this why the hell did it have to be Tony Stark? Stephen panicked and he just knew he needed to get out of here. He reached forward to grab his change but his shaking hand knocked the cup over and the coins scattered across the pavement. He cursed under his breath. It had taken him all day to gather that… $2.76… He didn’t have time to pick it up… He needed to get out… He needed out.

Out.

Out.

Tony couldn’t see him like this.

Stephen jumped up but he got up too quickly and he hadn’t eaten properly in days and his head swam and he stumbled.

Tony caught him. “Hey,” he said, his voice took on a softer tone. “You’re okay. It’s okay.”

Stephen was so embarrassed. He tried to pull away from Tony’s grasp but his knees buckled and he almost fell again. Tony caught him a second time.

“Stephen, please calm down,” said Tony. “Look, I’m taking you back to my place okay?” Stephen’s head was fuzzy and he couldn’t think clearly. He knew Tony finding him was a good thing really but… Why did Tony have to see him like this? Why? He looked utterly pathetic and now he couldn’t even stand up on his own.

Tony took out his phone to call Happy to pick them up. Stephen was leaning heavily against him and Tony held him to support him.

"It's going to be okay, Stephen," he said. "Everything is going to be okay."

Stephen was quite a bit taller than Tony but he was so exhausted that he had crumpled against him. Tony looked down at Stephen and he had his eyes closed and was drifting in and out of consciousness.

Happy pulled up and got out of the car to help Tony. He froze when he saw Stephen.

"Stephen?"

Happy closed the distance between himself and the two men and put his arm around Stephen to help him to the car.

Stephen blearily opened his eyes and looked up at Happy. "Hey," he said tiredly before closing his eyes again. Stephen went limp in the arms of Tony and Happy as he lost consciousness.

Happy gave Tony a concerned look as they buckled Stephen into the back of the car.

"What the Hell happened to him, Tony?" asked Happy.

Tony shook his head. "I don't know," said Tony as he climbed into the car beside Stephen.

"Should I take you to the hospital?"

Tony grimaced and looked at Stephen. "No, just take us home."

Happy looked over to Stephen and seemed to disagree with Tony on not taking him to the hospital but he nodded and closed the car door and jumped into the front to drive them back to Tony's apartment.

Tony took the sight of Stephen in. He'd never seen him like this. In the years that they had dated Stephen never so much as went a day without showering and he'd never seen him even with stubble but now...

Stephen's hair was a greasy and matted mess on top of his head and his beard was in a mangled state. His clothes were rumpled, wet and dirty and he tried to ignore it but Stephen smelled terrible.

"What the hell happened to you?" asked Tony. Tony grimaced. He’d heard of the accident of course. He knew it had been serious and that Stephen had been badly injured but he just assumed that if he couldn’t perform surgery anymore that the doctor would become a consultant or go into lecturing or something. Anything. He’d never expected that he’d find Stephen in a heap on the pavement.

Stephen was leaning against Tony's shoulder and although Tony felt sick at the smell of him he didn't have the heart to push him away.

Tony was angry. Sure, he'd been busy lately and he and Stephen had broken up a long time ago but... How could he not have come to him if things had got this bad? Granted, they hadn't broken up on the best of terms but hell, who did? Tony hated that Stephen had chosen the streets over picking up the phone and giving him a call. Tony wrapped his arm around Stephen's shoulder and held him close to himself. No matter what he wasn't going to let Stephen go back to the street corner he had found him on.

The drive back to his apartment was uneventful. Stephen woke up a few times but only had the energy to look around the car and didn't speak before closing his eyes again and falling back into a restless sleep. Stephen was vaguely aware of being in the car and when he woke again he looked at the buildings of New York zoom past the window as Happy drove along. He sighed and let his head fall back against Tony’s shoulder. He could feel Tony’s arm around his shoulders. He could smell him now too, Tony always smelt of home and comfort and Stephen felt himself calming down.... Drifting off... God, he was tired...

So tired.

Stephen must have blacked out on the way to Tony’s apartment because the next thing he knew he was sitting on Iron Man’s sofa and being handed a cup of hot sweet tea.

“Drink up doc,” said Tony with a smile as he sat down on the coffee table beside Stephen. He was so close their knees touched and Stephen swallowed awkwardly at the contact.

“Thanks,” he breathed quietly. Stephen readjusted himself on the sofa and tried to sip his tea without spilling it which proved to be difficult, his hands hurt like hell today and shook uncontrollably and his head pounded and he just wanted to sleep.

They sat in an uncomfortable silence as Stephen drank his tea. He knew Tony wanted an explanation but he wasn’t sure how to say it all. “Oh, hey Tone, I was in a shitty car accident which fucked up my hands beyond belief and no doctor can fix them and now I’m penniless, jobless and living on the streets, how are you?” Stephen groaned into his tea.

“I heard about the accident,” said Tony finally breaking the silence. “Looks like you can add near death experience to the list of shit we have in common, eh?”

Stephen smiled weakly. “Yeah.”

“Look man,” said Tony leaning forward and placing a hand on Stephen’s knee. Stephen raised his head and met Tony’s intense gaze. “It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about what happened,” continued Tony. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me but I’m just here to help you because well…” Tony’s thumb had begun to trace a gentle pattern on Stephen’s knee. “You really look like you need someone right now.”

Their eyes met again and Tony smiled. He looked older now than when Stephen had last seen him, the laughter lines around his eyes were more prominent now when he smiled but they suited him. Stephen found himself smiling back at Tony.

Stephen drank some more of his tea and slumped into the couch. He was exhausted.

Tony still had his hand on Stephen’s knee. Stephen didn’t want him to move and Tony didn’t want to move either.

“I’m going to set up the guest room for you,” said Tony. “Do you want to have a shower before you go to bed?”

Stephen smirked at him behind his cup of tea. “Is that a hint?”

Tony returned his smirk. “Let’s just say I’m not sure if your current scent will be bottled by Hugo Boss anytime soon.”

Stephen laughed then and Tony felt his heart jump just watching him laugh. Even now when he looked terrible and like he hadn’t slept in a week when he laughed Stephen still just looked… beautiful.

With a bit of effort Stephen got up off the couch and followed Tony down the hall. Tony reached into a closet and took a few towels down and handed them to Stephen. “I’ll set up the room for you,” said Tony. “Take your time in the shower.”

Stephen smiled. “Another hint?”

Tony flashed that killer smile of his as he turned and went into the guest room. “Remember to wash behind your ears, Strange.”

****

Stephen took a moment to enjoy the hot water cascading down his body. It felt like an age since he’d last showered. He closed his eyes and imagined the water washing away everything that had happened in the past year. It felt good. He inhaled deeply and ran his hand through his shaggy hair pushing it out of his eyes, he winced as his fingers got caught in the tangles in his hair and cringed at the thoughts of Tony seeing him like this. Stephen sighed and reached for a bottle of shower gel Tony had on a small shelf. He flicked open the cap and smelled it, it smelt of Tony. Stephen found himself groaning. He’d always loved Tony’s scent. It was strong, athletic, rich… arousing. Stephen poured some of the gel onto his shaking hand and lathered up his torso with the soap he groaned again. The scent got stronger as he cleaned himself. He closed his eyes and thought of Tony’s hands on his body. He missed Tony’s hands. He thought of Tony running his hands over his chest and he could feel himself getting hard just thinking of the other man. He groaned again and reached for his cock. He pictured Tony as the scent of his shower gel filled the shower. Stephen began stroking himself. He closed his eyes and his senses were just filled with Tony. His scent. He thought back to when Tony’s hands were on him, stroking him in earnest and clutching at his arse.

He groaned at the memory and quickened his pace. He thought of when he showered with Tony and the hot water danced down their backs and Tony would rut against him and stroke him bite his neck before trailing kisses up his jawline and sucking on his ear. He whined… He was so close.

He could almost hear Tony in his ear. “Come for me, tiger.”

Oh!

Stephen was panting now as he pumped his cock he was so close, so close. He remembered Tony’s face when he came back then, when he spilled out onto Tony’s hand. He remembered Tony’s face and the way he smiled and how he had kissed him then and he remembered the twinkle in his boyfriend’s eyes and how happy and proud he’d looked and how no other man could ever look as good as Tony did in that moment. And with that picture in his mind Stephen was coming. “TONY!” yelled Stephen as he came in the shower, his cum splatted the tiled wall. He breathed heavily as he came down. That was so hot. Just thinking of Tony had sent him over the edge.

“Stephen?” asked Tony from the other side of the bathroom door.

“Shit shit shit shit,” thought Stephen.

“You okay man?” asked Tony. “You called me?”

Stephen felt like he was about ready to die of embarrassment. “Yeah, I’m fine,” Stephen swallowed. “I just ummm can I use your shampoo?”

Tony laughed and Stephen’s embarrassment rose further. “Sure man,” said Tony. “I left some clean clothes out on guest bed. Threw that shit you were wearing in the washer.”

Stephen heard Tony walk away and slowly stood back up completely. That ranked in at least the top ten most embarrassing moments of his life so far. He rinsed the shower wall clean before taking the shower gel again and cleaning his face and body. Tony’s scent on his body would always be a comfort. He washed his hair and stood under the water for another few minutes before sighing and turning off the water.

It felt good to have hot water again, a luxury he had gone without during the last few weeks he’d stayed in his old apartment. He felt a pang of shame rising within him but tried to shut it down. He didn’t want to think about that right now.

He stepped out of the shower, wrapped a towel around his waist and ran a shaking hand over the bathroom mirror and took in his reflection. He looked like shit. His face was tired and grey looking and he noticed a few more lines around his eyes that he swore hadn’t been there before the stress of the last year had taken its toll on him. The grey flecks in his hair were more prominent than ever. Hell, he was only 40, how could he be this grey at 40? He didn’t even want to think about the beard… He hadn’t been able to stomach shaving since the accident. Mostly because he couldn’t even hold the blade anymore, one false move or unfortunate hand spasm and he could cut his throat and secondly because sometimes he just wanted that to happen. He wanted to end it all. He looked at his shaking hands and painfully stretched them out. The shake in his hands travelled all the way up to his forearms.

He’d spoken to Pangborn. He’d seen his charts, he saw everything… He’d read his injuries and yet he had watched him play basketball. Stephen was no idiot… He’d seen his own records and he’d tried pretty much every procedure and drug out there, he knew… He knew that he was running out of options. Pangborn’s cure he’d discovered in Nepal was his last chance and if that didn’t work then… then… then… His mind drifted back to the thoughts he’d had the last time he shaved.

No.

Stephen painfully clenched his fists, his nails digging into his palms. He sighed heavily and left the bathroom. He could hear Tony singing to himself in the kitchen and he smiled weakly. He padded down the hall to the guest bedroom. He’d always liked Tony’s apartment, granted whenever he had spent the night at Tony’s it wasn’t the guest room he’d slept in. Stephen laughed to himself, come to think of it he had never slept much when he stayed at Tony’s. The guest bedroom was huge. Stephen’s eyes drifted to the large double bed in the centre of the room and he just wanted to bury himself in the sheets.

Tony had left out a pair of flannel pyjama bottoms and a plain t-shirt and Stephen smiled again. He lifted the shirt and smelled it. It smelt of Tony. Stephen’s smile broadened as he dried himself off and got dressed. He smelt of Tony and he was wearing his clothes and he was standing in is apartment and it all felt a bit much and he loved this feeling. He missed this feeling.

Stephen was just about to get into the bed when there was a knock on the door.

"Come in, Tone," he said tiredly.

Tony came in and smiled when he saw Stephen. "Feeling better?" he asked.

Stephen returned his smile. "Much," he said as he sat down on the corner of the bet and yawned.

Tony crossed the room and took a towel that Stephen had thrown on the bed and started to dry Stephen's hair. Stephen felt himself leaning into Tony's touch.

"Your hair is a mess," said Tony as he reached over and took a comb from the side table.

Stephen simply shrugged as Tony struggled to detangle his hair.

Stephen let his head fall against Tony's chest as the other man worked on his hair and felt himself drifting off with the familiar sound of Tony's heart beating. He was almost asleep when...

"Ow!" Stephen recoiled back as Tony ripped the comb through a bad knot in his hair.

"I told you your hair was a mess," said Tony in his matter-of-fact voice.

"That hurt," whined Stephen although he was just being dramatic now. He smirked. "You know I have very sensitive follicles."

Tony pulled Stephen back towards him and continued to work on his hair. "Funny, I don't remember you complaining about sensitive follicles whenever I used to pull your hair when we had sex."

"Hard to complain when I was sucking you off."

Tony laughed as he finished off Stephen's hair and put the comb and towel down. He ran his fingers through Stephen’s now floppy and tangle free hair and placed his other hand on Stephen’s knee. He smiled. “Much better,” he said softly.

Stephen returned his smile. “Thank you,” he said. Stephen was exhausted and he just wanted to sleep but he didn’t want Tony to go. He felt at home with the other man and he wanted to stay in this moment forever.

“I’ve missed you,” said Stephen finally.

“Well I am pretty awesome,” said Tony in return.

Stephen smiled then and Tony thought that if the only thing he ever achieved for the rest of his life was to make Stephen Strange smile then that would be a life well lived.
Stephen manoeuvred himself so he was back leaning against Tony's chest as the other man continued to brush through his hair with his fingers. For the first time in weeks Stephen felt safe again. He felt utterly relaxed in Tony's arms. He knew Tony was saying something to him but he felt too tired to listen. He closed his eyes and relaxed further into the other man's touch.

It was only when Stephen began to softly snore against Tony that the smaller man realised the doctor had fallen asleep. Tony smiled softly and with some effort managed to get up from the bed and get Stephen under the covers without waking him up.

"Get some rest, Tiger," he said softly and without even thinking about what he was doing he leant down and kissed Stephen's forehead. Tony smiled down at the other man again and turned off the bedside light and padded softly out of the room. He had no intention of waking Stephen up for a long time, the man looked like he hadn’t slept in a week Tony was more than happy just to let Stephen get some rest. He sure as hell looked like he needed it. They could talk about everything later.

****
Tony took out his iPad and did a Google search on Stephen. It had been four years since they'd broken up and he hadn't kept in contact with Stephen at all. It had hurt too much to keep in contact with him at the start. Tony still remembered the day he'd signed into Facebook to see that Stephen had updated his status to "in a relationship with Christine Palmer". That had been three years ago and still Tony felt a pang in his chest thinking about it. He remembered scrolling through Christine's photos and seeing pictures of her and Stephen smiling down the camera and he just felt wrong.

It should have been him. Or at least that's how he felt. He felt like he should be the one dancing with Stephen at weddings or having Sunday brunch in fancy cafés or spending a weekend in Vermont but instead Stephen had a girlfriend and he was alone. Tony deleted Stephen from Facebook that day. He just couldn't bear to see him happy with someone else yet. Things got crazy with the Avengers then and of course there was Pepper and as time went by he thought of Stephen less and less.

Tony sighed at the memory. Now with a broken Stephen Strange asleep in his guest room he regretted breaking contact with him. Maybe if he had kept that connection then maybe he wouldn't have found the man in a heap on a street corner in New York.

Tony shook his head and went back to his iPad. One of the top results was an article about the car crash. Tony hesitated before clicking on it. He skimmed the article and felt sick when he saw the photos of the wrecked car. When he saw the wreckage in the river he had to look away... How did Stephen survive this?

He scrolled to the end and saw there was comments from people on Facebook. Tony wouldn't have thought it was possible but the comments were worse than the photos.

"He wouldn't even see my husband when he needed surgery last year. Dickhead. Couldn't have happened a nicer person."

"I'd the displeasure of meeting Dr Strange at a medical conference two years ago. Utter asshole."

"Such a shame... That was a beautiful car."

"He should have died. My sister died after he refused to operate on her. He should be gone too. An eye for an eye."

Tony had to exit out of the tab then. He knew Stephen could be a dick but he didn't deserve those kinds of comments. Nobody deserved to be told they should have died. These people didn't know Stephen like he did, they knew the arrogant doctor who thought he knew everything. They didn't know the Stephen he knew. They didn't know the Stephen that had gone into medicine to find a cure to save his little sister, Donna's life, the same little sister who died when he was 26 and he still carried her photo in his wallet. They didn't know the Stephen who donated his first pay cheque as a doctor to a donkey sanctuary because Donna had always loved donkeys. They didn't know the Stephen who he had to go and pick up at the hospital the night his first patient died on the operating table because he couldn't stop crying. Those fuckers online... They didn't know who he was, not really. Stephen could be a condescending ass but he also had a heart of gold. Just, not everyone could see it.

Tony went back to his search and found Stephen's Facebook. He hadn't seen this since the day he deleted him as a friend. He looked up and made sure Stephen hadn't come out of the bedroom before clicking on his profile. His profile photo was a serious looking picture that looked more like a passport picture than something someone would put online as a profile icon. Stephen being Stephen still looked utterly gorgeous in it. He scrolled through some of Stephen's photos and found some of him with Christine and some of him at medical conferences doing talks and a few with a man Tony didn't recognise but judging on the closeness of the two men in photos he appeared to be another ex of Stephen's. When he flicked to the next photo and saw it was a tagged picture of Stephen and this man kissing at some club and it confirmed his suspicions. Tony felt that same pang of jealousy in his chest he had felt when he had seen the photos with Christine and he exited out of the photos and looked through Stephen's timeline.

Stephen's last post was from six weeks ago. "It's been almost a year and no signs of improvement. I have one more shot at fixing this and after that I don't know what I'll do."

No likes. No comments.

Tony checked Stephen's friend count. 452. Something felt really tragic about that to Tony. Stephen had over 450 friends on Facebook and not one of them responded to that post. No one so much as liked it.

He had been all alone.

Tony turned off his iPad. He couldn't look at it anymore. His heart and head hurt just thinking of how Stephen must have felt. His life was falling to pieces and he had had no one.

"I'm sorry," said Tony out loud. He knew Stephen couldn't hear him but he felt terrible. If he had known what was going on with the other man he would have helped in a heartbeat. He'd have dropped everything for him.

 

Whatever Stephen needed Tony was going to help him. He might not be able to fix his hands but maybe he could help fix his life, even just a little.

Tony sighed and checked the clock again and although he suspected Stephen would sleep for another few hours yet he decided to make a start on dinner so the man could eat something when he woke up. Stephen had always been slim but he was never as small and light as he was when Tony had carried him into the apartment earlier. If all he could offer Stephen for now was a bed and hot meals then so be it.

 

****

It was almost 8pm before Tony finally heard movement coming from the guest room. Figuring that Stephen was awake he started to reheat the food he had made earlier. He hadn’t been hungry enough to eat himself earlier but he felt he should join Stephen in eating now and hopefully make him feel more at home. When Stephen finally went back to the kitchen, Tony had a bowl of pasta sitting on the table waiting for him. Tony flashed him a smile as he leaned against a counter top eating his own dinner. Stephen said something that resembled a thank you before collapsing down on a chair and practically inhaling the dish.

Tony laughed, “my cooking has got better since we were together?”

Stephen moaned his approval with his mouth full of pasta. God, he was hungry. Stephen was finished his meal in minutes and pushed the dish away from himself and leaned back wiping his mouth on a napkin. It was only then that he looked up and realised Tony had been staring at him the entire time. The other man had long since abandoned his own dish and stood with his arms folded studying Stephen. The doctor suddenly felt embarrassed again and broke eye contact.

“We don’t have to talk about it,” said Tony.

Stephen looked back up at Tony. He was a good man, a really good man. He was a better man than Stephen ever could be and he knew that. The doctor sighed. He suddenly felt really tired again.

“Thank you for letting me shower and take a rest and have something to eat but I really should get going now,” he said. “I have burdened you enough, Tony.”
“You’re joking, right?” said Tony pushing himself away from the kitchen counter and walking towards Stephen. “Stephen, I found you on the streets this morning. I know you have nowhere to go back to.”

Stephen hung his head. There was nothing to say to that.

Tony leaned over the counter and placed his hand on top of one of Stephen’s shaking ones. “We don’t have to talk about what happened if you don’t want to, Stephen,” he said. Tony’s voice had taken on its soft tone. “But I’m not about to abandon you when I can tell you need help.”

“You don’t have to go all Iron Man on me,” said Stephen. He still hadn’t looked up at Tony, instead he remained focused on their hands. “I’m not some damsel in distress who needs a hero.”

Tony was surprised by that comment. He studied Stephen carefully for a moment. He knew bitterness and aggression were Stephen’s defences. Whenever someone tried to get close to him, he’d venomously pushed them away. Always. Even now the man seemed unable to accept help.

Tony sighed. “I’m not trying to be a hero, Stephen.” He said finally.

Stephen looked up at him. “What are you trying to be then?” he asked.

Tony held Stephen’s hand just a little tighter. “A friend.”

They seemed stuck in a silence after that, neither man seemed to know what to say. Stephen continued to stare at their hands on the countertop. His own marred hand under Tony’s perfect and soft one. He felt unworthy to know Tony Stark. All the man had done today was help him and all he’d offered in return was anger. Tony didn’t deserve that. Tony deserved love and affection and warmth and joy and all the golden things life had to offer.

None of which Stephen ever felt he’d be worthy enough to give Tony.

“I’m being an asshole,” said Stephen finally.

Tony laughed at that. “Some things never change, Strange.”

Stephen smiled ruefully as he took his hand from under Tony’s and intertwined their fingers. Stephen finally looked up and met Tony’s eyes. The man was as beautiful as the first day he’d ever met him. “I’m sorry,” he said.

Tony walked around to Stephen’s stool and stood beside him. He reached over and brushed an errant curl of Stephen’s behind his ear. “Forget about it,” he said softly.

Tony brushed his hand through Stephen’s hair again before cupping Stephen’s face with both hands. As Stephen was sitting, it gave Tony the rare stance of being the taller one and for a moment he was unsure if this was what Stephen wanted. Maybe he had misread the signs. Maybe this wasn’t what Stephen had wanted at all but when he felt the other man put his shaking hands on his hips he knew they both wanted this. Tony dipped down and took Stephen’s mouth in his own. Tony instantly melted into the kiss. Kissing Stephen felt like home. He pushed forward to deepened the kiss and Stephen spread his legs so Tony could stand between them. He groaned into Stephen’s mouth. Stephen’s hands trailed Tony’s back and Tony had gone from cupping Stephen’s face to his arms wrapped around the doctor’s neck. God, Tony loved this.

It was only when Tony pushed forward again and Stephen nearly fell backwards off the stool that they broke apart into a fit of giggles.

“I nearly threw you to the floor then,” said Tony. “Breakfast bar isn’t really the place for kissing like that.”

Stephen smirked. “Take me to bed then.”

Tony could feel himself getting hard at the thoughts of that alone. He pulled Stephen to his feet and kissed him deeply again as they stumbled out of the kitchen, never once breaking the kiss. Stephen moaned against Tony and the sound went straight to Tony’s cock. Tony pinned Stephen against the bedroom door and broke the kiss and began sucking on the doctor’s neck as Stephen scrambled to find the door handle behind his back. When Stephen pushed through the door Tony found his mouth again and kissed him still.

Tony pushed Stephen down towards the bed and kissed him continuously. He explored Stephen’s mouth with his tongue and Stephen moaned with pleasure at the taste of the other man. Stephen had had many partners but none of them tasted like Tony. None of them even came close. Tony broke the kiss and Stephen groaned impatiently. Tony simply laughed.

“Easy, Tiger,” he said playfully leaning forward again and kissing his nose. “You were always so needy.”

Tony pulled back and took his shirt off over his head and Stephen unconsciously raised his arms and rested his hands on Tony’s ribs. He trailed his left hand up Tony’s torso and if his hands shook now Stephen didn’t feel it, he was too focused on the half-naked man before him. He took one of Tony’s nipples and rubbed the dark nub between his forefinger and his thumb. Tony threw his head back and groaned.

Stephen readjusted himself on the bed to give himself more height and began to bite Tony’s neck, he wanted to leave a mark that would be there for days. If the godforsaken Avengers had a meeting Tony would be hiding himself from the prying eyes of Captain America. Stephen chuckled to himself at the thought.

Stephen began to trail kisses down Tony’s neck and his chest. He took a nipple in his mouth and sucked hard and Tony groaned louder still, Stephen smiled against the other man’s breast as he felt Tony’s hands drift down to his arse and clench his cheeks.

“You’re wearing far too many clothes, Strange,” said Tony as his thumbs fiddled with the waistline of Stephen’s pyjama bottoms. Stephen planted a gentle kiss on Tony chest before looking at the other man, their faces so close their noses touched. “Do something about it then, Stark,” said Stephen his voice dark with lust.
In one swift movement Tony pulled Stephen’s shirt over his head and pulled his bottoms down to his knees. Stephen laughed and as he tried to step out of the pyjamas he lost his balance and toppled over on Tony, pinning him to the bed. Stephen looked down at Tony beneath him and smiled before leaning down and kissing him deeply. God, he’d missed this.

Stephen leant back slightly and smiled down at Tony, brushing a loose strand of hair back from Iron Man’s face.

“Oh no, Strange,” said Tony. “Don’t be getting ideas, you sure as hell are not topping tonight.”

Stephen threw his head back and laughed. Tony reached up and put his hand on Stephen’s chest. He could feel his heart beating, Tony smiled. “I missed you.”

“Me too,” said Stephen as he bent to kiss Tony again. Stephen began to trail kisses down Tony’s torso, slowly working his way down the other man’s body. Stephen toyed with the waistband of Tony’s sweatpants before pulling them down. Stephen eyed Tony’s erection through his boxers and licked his lips. He palmed the front of Tony’s pants which elicited a groan from the man and Stephen smiled before pulling off Tony’s pants and releasing his cock.

Stephen adjusted himself on the bed before lowering himself. He inhaled the scent of Tony’s groin and looked up at the man and smirked before licking his length. Stephen put his hand on the base of Tony’s cock before taking him in his mouth. Tony reached forward for Stephen and clutched his hair as the doctor sucked his cock. “Uhhh uhhh uhhh Steph-Stephen.”

Stephen loved this. He loved taking Tony like this, turning the other man into this groaning wreck. Ugh it was beautiful. Stephen picked up speed, swallowing Tony down, savouring his taste. “Stephen, Steph- oh!” said Tony fist clenching in Stephen’s hair. “I’m clo-close… but I don’t wanna come like thi- ah ah ah. I want to be inside you.”

Stephen said something, his mouth still full of cock.

“What?”

Stephen released Tony with a slobbery plop. “I said,” he repeated with a smug grin. “You are inside me.”

Tony put his hand behind Stephen’s neck and pulled him down, flipping them so Stephen now lay on the bed and he was on top of him and he kissed him vigorously. He could taste himself in Stephen’s mouth and he hummed in delight. Tony pulled up and took the pillows from the head of the bed. “Lift your hips,” he said and Stephen complied and Tony placed the pillows beneath him to elevate him.

Tony reached for the bedside locker and took a bottle of lube from the drawer. He flipped the cap and poured some of the contents over his fingers. He made a show of it because he’s Tony Stark and of course he makes everything into a show.

“Just get on with it,” said Stephen impatiently, rolling his hips.

Tony laughed as he circled his finger around Stephen’s entrance. Tony watched the doctor who was panting already and covered in sweat. His head thrown back on the bed and revealing his beautiful neck to Tony. Christ, he was gorgeous. Tony entered him with a finger.

Stephen gasped loudly. Stephen laughed, “in the sho-shower,” he said. “I used your shower gel… It smelt like you… So hot…”

Tony pushed in easily with a second finger and Stephen hummed before continuing “I closed my eyes and imagined you touching me… I started stroking myself and pretended it was your hand.”

The thought of Stephen masturbating in the shower, his shower, and thinking of him sent a wave of pleasure through Tony. God. Tony scissored the man open.

“Your hand on my cock,” said Stephen with a gasp. Stroking and stroking…. Unt-until I felt so hard I-I’d explode.”

Tony toyed with entering him with a third finger, Stephen’s muscles resisting slightly before finally allowing Tony to penetrate him further. Stephen was almost prepared enough now but Tony was enjoying this. He quickly found Stephen’s prostate and the doctor lurched forward. “Is that why you yelled my name?” asked Tony finally.

Stephen smirked as Tony hit his prostate again, it was the only confirmation he needed.

“Tony,” gasped Stephen as the man entered him with a fourth finger. “Fuck me, please.”

Tony pulled his fingers from Stephen and the doctor whined at the sudden feeling of emptiness as Tony took the lube again and generously coated his cock. Tony looked to Stephen, his pupils were blown with lust and his fringe clung to his forehead. The doctor smiled and Tony’s heart leapt. He was beautiful like this. Tony took Stephen’s hand in his own and intertwined their fingers and pinned Stephen’s arm against the mattress before lining himself up and pushing into him with his cock.

They both gasped. Tony waited a moment to allow Stephen to adjust before he pulled almost all the way out before burying himself in again.

“I’m not a china doll Tony,” said Stephen. “Come on fuck me.”

Tony laughed and let go of Stephen’s hand before throwing the doctor’s legs over his shoulder and grabbing his hips. “Whatever the princess wants.”

Tony began pounding into Stephen without abandon and the noise of flesh on flesh filled the room. Tony found his rhythm and was hitting Stephen’s prostate with every thrust. Tony watched as Stephen took his own cock in his hand and began pumping it. Oh, God, he was gorgeous. Tony felt he could come just by watching Stephen touching himself.

“Uhhhhh,” groaned Stephen. “I’m so-so close.” Stephen lifted his hips further and Tony went faster still. He was close too, so close.

“Come for me baby,” said Tony. “I want to see you covered in your own cum, you’re so beautiful.”

Stephen’s pumping quickened and he came with a yell. Stephen spilt out over his chest and face and Tony had never seen something so beautiful. Tony felt Stephen tighten around him and he was gone too he filled Stephen up with his cum. Tony rode out his orgasm before he half collapsed on top of the doctor who was still incoherently mumbling his name. Tony licked the cum from Stephen’s face before finding his mouth and they began lazily kissing again.

Tony panted. “That was-

“Amazing,” finished Stephen.

Tony pulled out of Stephen and sat up. Tony padded to the en-suite bathroom and threw Stephen back a packet of wipes and a towel to clean himself up. Tony came back out from the bathroom to see Stephen picking his clothes up from the floor. Just seeing the doctor’s bare ass in the air as he reached down to pick up his shirt was almost too much and Tony wanted nothing more than to just bend Stephen over the bed and fuck him again but he wasn’t 19 anymore and his recovery time wasn’t what it used to be.

Stephen put back on his clothes and Tony crossed the floor and wrapped his arms around him. Stephen put a shaking hand on Tony’s and grimaced when he noticed his tremor. Tony kissed Stephen’s ear and moved him towards the bed. “You look beat,” he said.

“I am,” said Stephen as he climbed into the bed.

Tony smiled ruefully as he lay down beside him. Tony drew a simple pattern with his fingers on Stephen’s chest as the doctor closed his eyes. Tony finally rested his hand over Stephen’s heart and watched as the other man slowly drifted off to sleep.

Tony grimaced. Stephen looked like a shell of his former self. He was thinner, paler and unkempt. He was a far cry from the rich doctor he knew so well. Tony couldn’t help but feel annoyed that Stephen hadn’t come to him for help, no matter what note they ended on he’d never refuse Stephen help. Damn the man anyway, of course he was stubborn enough that he’d rather live on the streets than admit he needed someone.

Tony rolled over onto his back and sighed. He didn’t think today would end with him being in bed with Stephen Strange of all people. Stephen groaned in his sleep and rolled over and put his arm around Tony.

Tony sighed through his nose and looked at Stephen’s hand before gently picking his hand up and holding it. Even as the man slept the tremor still ran through the doctor’s hands. Tony ran his thumb over the scars and calloused skin of Stephen’s hand.

“Nepal,” said Stephen suddenly. Tony jumped, he hadn’t realised Stephen had woken up.

“What about Nepal?”

“I was talking to this man… He was paralysed from the neck down, never walk again and Hell I spoke to him on the basketball court running about owning kids half his age.”
With some effort, Stephen intertwined his fingers with Tony. Tony pretended not to notice the shake in Stephen’s hand or the grimace of pain on his face. “He found doctors in Nepal who cured him… They must be using new tech that isn’t legal here yet, all I know is it’s my last chance… I’ve had seven procedures here Tone and I’m not…” Stephen closed his eyes. “I’m not getting any better.”

Tony pulled Stephen closer to him. He already knew the answer to what he was about to ask but he needed to hear it from Stephen. “Why did I find you on the streets earlier?”
Tony felt Stephen go tense against him, Stephen’s hand took Tony’s a little tighter. Both of their hands were trembling now because of Stephen’s shot nerves. “I couldn’t work because of my hands,” Stephens voice was smaller now, almost childlike. Tony watched him. In that moment, this wasn’t the confident man he’d once known. “I was never really the saving for a rainy-day type,” Stephen smiled ruefully. “Seven operations pretty much destroyed my savings… I… I sold my apartment and everything in it… Christine left.” Stephen laughed hollowly. We weren’t still together but she was… nice and I fucked that up. She isn’t coming back this time and then the money really ran out. I’m going to sell my watch, I was going to do that today… I just need enough to get a ticket to Nepal. I’ll figure everything else out then.”

“Couldn’t you have become a consultant or something?” Asked Tony. Tony felt Stephen go tense again and instantly regretted his question. Stephen dropped Tony’s hand and sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed and buried his head in his hands. He sat like that for what felt like a long time.

“I can barely even write my own name, Tone.” He said finally. “Who’d take the advice of a man who can’t even hold a pen never mind a scalpel?”

Tony moved across the bed to sit with Stephen and wrapped his arm around him and put his other hand on his knee. “You’re a great doctor, Stephen.”

Stephen sighed through his nose and put his hand over Tony’s. “I was a great doctor.”

Tony’s heart sank for Stephen. He moved his hand from the man’s knee and cupped his bearded face and gently turned Stephen’s head so they were facing one another. Tony looked Stephen in the eye. He always loved his eyes, they were like the ocean, green and blue and flecked with gold. Beautiful. Tony put a hand on the back of Stephen’s neck and pushed their mouths together and kissed him deeply. Tony never wanted to stop kissing him, he never wanted to stop tasting him, holding him. He loved how Stephen would fight to dominate a kiss but then retreat back in an instant. He loved how Stephen would nibble on his lip and blow cool air on his tongue. He just loved every little thing about kissing this man.

Tony broke the kiss and rested his forehead against Stephen's. He looked at the other man and then he had an idea and suddenly jumped up from the bed and over to his desk in the corner of the room.

Stephen simply stared as Tony powered on his laptop. "What are you doing?"

Tony was already on an airline website searching for the next available flight to Nepal. "I'm buying you your plane tickets to find this miracle cure of yours," he said as he found an appropriate flight and began entering in his payment details.

"No!" Said Stephen jumping up from the bed and towards Tony. "I can't let you do that."

"Too bad," said Tony who looked up at Stephen with a smirk. He made a show of clicking enter on the keyboard. "Already done."

Stephen looked at the screen as a message popped up confirming Tony's payment. "Tony, I-

"I think the usual protocol is to say thank you at this point," said Tony as he made a reach for Stephen's hand.

Stephen looked down at their joined hands, Tony's perfect soft skinned strong hand in his own shaking and scarred one. "Thank you."

"2am tomorrow night," said Tony. "It was the first flight I could find for you."

"I don't have the money to pay you back," said Stephen.

Tony laughed he tugged the waistband of Stephen’s pyjamas and pulled Stephen towards him. Stephen stood between Tony’s legs and Tony moves his hands to hold Stephen’s hips. Stephen threw his arms around Tony’s neck.

“I guess I’ll have to think of alternate way of repayment,” said Tony with a smirk.

Stephen returned his smile. “Anything in mind?”

Tony gave Stephen’s arse a firm squeeze. “I’ll think of something.”

Stephen leant forward to kiss him, softly this time. "Thank you," he said.

Tony toyed with the errant cur that fell over Stephen's forehead. "Don't mention it."

They kissed again.

Stephen then took Tony's hand and led him to the bed. Tony chuckled, "round two?"

Stephen twirled on his heel to face him and kissed him again. They continued to move towards the bed as the kissed and when the back of Stephen's knees hit the side of the mattress he allowed himself to fall down into the bed and Tony followed him, they never broke the kiss. They lay there on the bed kissing lazily until Stephen fell asleep in Tony's arms. As Tony lay there holding the other man he drifted off too, falling asleep with a smile on his face for the first night in months.

****

Tony woke up with the pleasant weight of a still sleeping Stephen Strange lying on his chest. Tony wrapped his arm around Stephen’s shoulders and kissed the top of his head. He reached over for his phone and checked the time. 11am… Wow, he hadn’t slept in this late for a long time. Stephen groaned softly and yawned against Tony’s neck before blearily opening his eyes. “Hey,” he said, his voice rough with sleep.

“Hey,” said Tony as he took Stephen’s chin in his hand and lifted his head to kiss him. Tony rolled them over and pinned Stephen to the bed, deepening the kiss. Stephen’s hands trailed down Tony’s back and rested on his arse. He gave it a firm squeeze and Tony bit Stephen’s lip in response.

Tony broke the kiss before giving Stephen a soft peck on the nose. “I’m going to go for a shower,” he said. He kissed Stephen again. “Joining me?”
Stephen smirked. “Oh God, yes.”

They stripped each other as they walked towards the bathroom. Stephen planted kisses all over Tony’s body, he wanted to taste all of him. “You’re mine, Stark,” said Stephen as they stepped into the shower. Tony laughed as he turned on the water.

“Oh, really?” he asked as the water began to soak them both. Stephen pushed Tony against the shower wall and grabbed Tony’s arse.

“Really.”

Stephen turned Tony around and ogled that perfectly toned butt. He ran his finger down the cleft and hummed. “Beautiful,” he said.

Stephen wrapped his arms around Tony's waist and started kissing his neck, the hot rain of water splashed down his face as he trailed his kisses lower and lower kissing Tony's shoulder blades and down his spine. Stephen broke the kiss to look for something to use as lubricant and Tony brushed past him, opened the shower door and reached for a bottle on the bathroom shelf before handing it to Stephen.

“Do you just have lube in every room of the house?”

“Gotta be prepared, Pretty Boy,” said Tony with a smirk before kissing Stephen again.

Stephen broke the kiss and he moved to stand behind Tony. He flipped open the bottle and poured a generous dollop onto his hand and he reached for Tony’s cock and began stroking him. Tony leaned into the touch as Stephen began stroking him harder and sucking on his neck. Tony hummed and Stephen chuckled softly as he reached down between them, with his other hand and ran a finger down Tony’s cleft and toyed with his puckered hole. Tony leant forward, and resting his elbows against the shower wall, he was already panting.

“wha’cha waiting for doc?” Stephen laughed again and stepped forward closing the gap between them. He ran his right hand along Tony's perineum before fondling his balls and biting his neck. Stephen took his left hand from Tony's cock and pinched the other man's nipple hard.

Tony gasped and Stephen smiled against his neck before running kisses up his jawline and finally nipping his ear. "You ready, Stark?" he whispered into Tony's ear.

Tony turned his head and his mouth found Stephen's and they kissed sloppily, the water from the shower splashing down on their faces. Stephen took the kiss as a yes and poured more lube onto his fingers and pushed a digit into Tony. Tony bucked at the contact. It had been a long time since he'd been taken.

Stephen froze, "you okay?" he asked his voice suddenly soft. He hadn’t done this since his accident and he was worried his damaged hands could hurt Tony further. "We don't have to do this."

"I'm fine," said Tony in between deep intakes of breaths. Don't stop, please."

Stephen returned to sucking on Tony's neck and continued to roll Tony's nipple between his fingers as he began to slowly open him with his finger. After a few moments, Stephen began to toy with adding a second finger.

"Do it."

Stephen smiled. "And you think I'm the impatient one." The doctor penetrated him with a second finger and Tony hummed in delight. Stephen started scissoring Tony open and Iron Man began groaning Stephen's name like a sort of chant.

 

"Stephen, just fucking do it-ah!" said Tony who was now leaning heavily against the shower.

"Language," said Stephen pinching Tony's nipple hard.

"Stephen... please," gasped Tony. "Please."

Stephen loved seeing Tony like this, the confident strong man begging for mercy. God, he'd missed this. Stephen pulled his fingers from Tony. He coated himself in lube and replaced his fingers with his cock. It was time for both of them to gasp. Stephen kissed Tony’s shoulders.

“You ready?” he asked his voice breathy.

Tony nodded. “Do it, please.”

Stephen kissed him before he started pounding into Tony and Tony was yelling his name and the louder Tony yelled the harder Stephen pounded into him. Tony leant forward and propped an elbow up on the shower wall for support. He reached down for his cock. Oh, God... He was close. Stephen grunted and pushed Tony’s hand away and took Tony's cock in his own hand and began stroking it as he thrusted into him harder and harder. Tony gasped louder and cried Stephen’s name as the other man found his prostrate. Tony saw stars and came with a shout in Stephen's hand. He practically collapsed against the shower wall as Stephen came inside him shortly afterwards, Tony's orgasmed yell made him lose all control and he leaned into Tony's back panting and totally spent.

Tony laughed when he finally got his breath back. "It's been a long long time since I've done that," he said as he turned around and kissed Stephen softly and took a bottle of shampoo from the shelf and started to wash the other man's hair.

Stephen wrapped his arms around Tony's neck. "You were always an amazing fuck," he said and kissed him. "So tight..." Tony massaged Stephen's scalp as he washed his hair. Stephen hummed. "Perfect."

All the hot water was gone by the time they finally stepped out of the shower, they just kept distracting each other, Tony just couldn't keep his mouth off Stephen's. "So much for saving water," joked Stephen.

They dried off and got dressed and padded softly to the kitchen. "Hungry?" asked Tony as opened the fridge and took out eggs and milk. Stephen simply nodded and Tony smiled. "Pancakes?"

"You always made the best 'morning after' breakfasts."

Tony laughed. "I've had a lot of morning afters."

"Slut."

Tony winked at Stephen as he started making the batter. "Wanna put a pot of coffee on?"

Stephen got up from the breakfast bar and got everything ready. As he began spooning coffee into the coffee maker the shake in his hands was worse than ever. Tony pretended not to notice as Stephen spilled coffee all over the counter after his hands spasmed painfully. Tony heard the clang of metal as the spoon fell to the floor and Stephen swore under his breath. Tony turned around and saw as Stephen clutched the kitchen counter and sighed angrily. Tony turned away quickly because he didn't want to embarrass the man by staring at him. Tony's heart felt heavy. Stephen had always been a bit of an ass but he was a good man really and one hell of a doctor. The people Stephen had saved, the surgeries he'd performed and now... He couldn't even make a fucking coffee. Tony flipped the pancake in the pan. Oh God, this... this... whatever the Hell it was that Stephen was going to Nepal for... It better work. Tony looked at Stephen out of the corner of his eye as he bent to pick up the spoon he had dropped and as he took a cloth and shakingly cleaned the counter. He looked so... defeated. This wasn't the same man he once knew and Tony didn't want to think of what would happen him if this procedure didn't work.

This was Stephen's last shot and if it didn't work then...

Tony took a deep breath and turned his attention back to cooking the pancakes. He felt if he continued to watch Stephen struggle that he might just cry and that would do neither of them any good.

Stephen came up behind him and wrapped his arms around him and rested his chin on Tony's shoulder. "You better have proper maple syrup for those," said Stephen gesturing to the pancakes in the pan. Not that cheap sugary supermarket shit."

"You think I'm into cheap shit?"

Stephen smirked. "Well..."

Tony faked annoyance before laughing. "I suppose you're right, Strange."

"Really?"

"Yeah, sure I like you."

"Fuck you."

Tony turned his head and kissed Stephen again before turning back to the pan. "You always say the sweetest things."

Stephen nuzzled Tony's cheek. The coffee maker clicked off and Stephen kissed Tony's temple before going back to making the coffee.

Tony plated up the pancakes and put two bottles of maple syrup on the table (the real stuff and the cheap shit because fuck you, Stephen Strange) and sat down at the counter as Stephen brought over the coffee. Stephen saw the syrups on the table and rolled his eyes and laughed and Tony loved the sound of him laughing. He'd missed this, sitting and having breakfast with Stephen.

Tony watched as Stephen smothered his pancakes in an atrocious amount of syrup. "Aren't you supposed to be a doctor?" Tony asked as Stephen put a dripping piece of pancake in his mouth.

Stephen swallowed. "Ah, put I'm not a dentist so I have no shame." Stephen took another bite and syrup dripped down his bearded chin. He grinned at Tony like a child and Tony laughed.

Tony ran his foot up Stephen's leg and back down again. "We should go out after breakfast," he said.

Stephen raised an eyebrow as he ate his pancakes.

"Need to get you some things for your trip."

Stephen shrugged. "I have all I need in my backpack. Passport, change of clothes and my tablet. I don't need anything else."

Tony trailed his foot up Stephen's leg and rested it against Stephen's crotch, he began to massage him with his toes. "I never saw you as a minimalist."

Stephen smiled. "I'm a changed man."

Tony grinned as he felt Stephen begin to harden again. "Clearly."

Tony pushed his plate away and moved and Stephen furrowed his brow in annoyance when Tony removed his foot. "Hey I didn’t say sto-"

Stephen gasped as Tony climbed under the counter and pulled down his pants and then Tony was on him swallowing him down. "To-Tony!"

Tony sloppily pulled off Stephen and looked up at him, Stephen looked down at the man on his knees beneath him. "Turns out I wasn't hungry for pancakes." Tony grins up at him before taking one of Stephen's balls in his mouth and giving it a long hard suck.

Stephen groaned as Tony put a hand to the base of his cock and licked a stripe down the vein. Tony took in Stephen's scent and hummed before taking him whole in his mouth.

Stephen put his hand on Tony's hair and pulled and Tony took him deeper.

"I'm close," said Stephen as he bucked and Tony took him impossibly deeper. The sound of Stephen gasping was music to Tony's ears. If he could just spend every morning like this.

Stephen yelled out Tony's name as he came in the man's mouth and Tony swallowed him down. Tony finally released Stephen before standing up between the man's legs and finding his mouth and kissing him again. Stephen could taste himself on Tony's tongue and he loved it.

When they finally broke the kiss, Tony rested his forehead against Stephen's and Stephen held onto his hips. Tony smiled and finally pulled himself away. "Finish your breakfast," he said. "Your coffee is probably cold and for God’s Sake Strange, pull up your trousers."

****

The day went by peacefully. It was 10pm and Tony was pretending to read a book on the sofa with a sleeping Stephen lying across him his head in his lap. Tony put his book down and watched Stephen sleep. He looked so perfect even with his stupid beard. Tony massaged his head with his hand and Stephen groaned softly in his sleep. Tony had had a lot of partners in his life but none quite like Stephen Strange. Stephen was someone he could see himself spending the rest of his life with. He always was. What he had with Stephen wasn't like what he'd had with Pepper. This was different. He trailed his hand down to Stephen's chest and lay his hand over the other man's chest. He could feel his heart beating through his shirt. Stephen made him feel infinitely alive and a better person.

Stephen yawned under him and his eyes fluttered open. He smiled when he saw Tony watching him. "Hey."

"Hey."

Stephen propped himself up on his elbow and leaned in to kiss Tony. Stephen adjusted himself on the sofa and sat up, he wrapped an arm around Tony's shoulder and folded his legs over Tony's. "What time is it?"

Tony ran his hand slowly up and down Stephen's thigh. "A little after ten."

They kissed again. This had been them all day. After they had gone to the store to get Stephen a few supplies for his trip they had spent the rest of the afternoon in one another’s arms, only taking a break from kissing one another to ask a question and answer it. They couldn’t keep their hands off one another. Tony felt like he was 17 again.

Stephen nuzzled Tony's chin. "We should probably head for the airport soon."

Tony felt something inside him go suddenly cold at the thought of Stephen leaving again. He didn't want him to go.

Stephen began sucking on Tony's neck again. "We don't have to leave just yet though."

Stephen moved on the sofa again so he was straddling Tony. He wrapped his arms around Tony's neck and kissed him. Tony melted into the kiss and groaned. He let his head fall back against the back of the sofa and Stephen followed him. Tony put his hands on Stephen's arse and squeezed his firm butt. Stephen pulled back and licked Tony's lips before nuzzling him again. Stephen rested his forehead against Tony's. "Fuck me," he said softly. "Please."

Tony pushed that one errant curl that always fell over Stephen's forehead behind his ear. God, he was beautiful. Tony took in the sight of the man above him. The high cheekbones, the impossible coloured eyes, his full lips and the utter softness of his face. The gorgeous vulnerable gaze he held and he wondered how many other people got to see this Stephen. This gentle version of the man. Stephen smiled down at him and Tony smiled back. Tony felt that heavy feeling in his chest again as he thought this could be their last time. Hell, this could be the last time they even saw each other and if it was God, he was going to make it a night to remember.
Tony kissed him again as he undid Stephen’s trousers with his hands. He pulled them down to Stephen’s knees and ran his hands over that arse again. Only Stephen’s underwear was in the way now. Tony groaned into the kiss. He toyed with the waistband of Stephen’s boxers as with his other hand he undid his own belt and unbuttoned his jeans.
Stephen broke the kiss and began sucking on Tony’s neck. Tony chuckled. Stephen had his neck destroyed. He’d have to wear a scarf for weeks at this stage. Tony took his hands off Stephen to pull down his own trousers and underwear. His cock was already hard and dripping pre-come.

“Awh shit,” said Tony. “The lube is over there.” Stephen took his mouth from Tony’s neck and pulled back slightly on the sofa. He brought his hand up to Tony’s mouth and brushed his fingertips against Tony’s lips.

Tony took Stephen’s fingers in his mouth and began to suck on them, coating them in his saliva. When Stephen pulled his hand back his fingers were dripping. Stephen brushed his hand against Tony’s cock coating his fingers in his pre-come too before reaching around and entering himself with his fingers.

Stephen placed a hand on Tony’s shoulder to support himself as he began to scissor himself open with his fingers with speed.

The sight of Stephen Strange fucking himself on his own fingers was enough to make Tony come just like that. Fuck, he wasn’t going to last long. Stephen was moaning and bucking his hips into Tony and the friction was so good.
“I’m ready,” he breathed. “Fuck me.”
Tony took his cock and lined himself up as Stephen pulled his fingers from his arse. Tony pushed in and they both cried out.
Stephen threw his head back and groaned. Tony put his hands on his hips and began to move. Stephen groaned again.

He still had his hand on Tony's shoulder to brace himself and they began to move together. The sound of skin on skin filled the room and Tony found Stephen's prostrate and thrust after thrust hit home and Stephen was groaning in earnest. He reached down and took his cock in his hand and started stroking himself. He was in time with Tony's thrusts and God, it was almost too much.

"TONY," yelled Stephen as he came in his hand, his body shuddering against Tony's as he spilt out over Tony's stomach.

That was enough to send Tony over the edge to and he came inside Stephen. They rode out each other’s orgasms, pleasure rushing through them. Stephen went limp against Tony and lazily kissed his shoulder, neck and trailed up his jawline before finding his mouth. They kissed softly like that for what felt like forever before Stephen finally broke the kiss and rested his forehead against Tony's and nuzzled his nose.

Tony looked into Stephen's eyes then and smiled. He was beautiful. So beautiful. God, he could stay with him here on this sofa forever. He wanted to turn back time, erase those years they weren't together and delete those stupid arguments they had had over the years and the last ridiculous argument that had ended in Stephen leaving and not coming back.

More than anything he didn't want Stephen to leave. He wanted him to stay. To start everything over again, to have a life with Stephen again. He wanted to be the one who woke up beside Stephen and held his hand during walks in the park and lay on the sofa watching crappy movies on a Friday night and more than anything in his life ever he just wanted to be with him, not only in this moment but forever.

Tony's mouth felt dry. It was now or never. If he didn't say it now, he'd lose Stephen again.

Stephen kissed his forehead then and made a move to stand up. "I'll get you a cloth to clean up, can't go to the airport with my cum over us both, can we?"

Tony reached and grabbed Stephen's wrist. He was going to say it. He was. Stay.

Stay.

Stay.

Please stay.

"Stephen," he said but his voice broke. He licked his lips nervously. "Stephen, that... that was-

Stephen smiled back and closed his hand around Tony's own. His tremor shaking both of their hands. "The perfect way to say goodbye," he said softly finishing Tony's sentence for him. "Thank you so much for everything, Tone. Just... thank you."

Stephen smiled again before gently letting go of Tony's hand and going to look for a flannel to clean themselves up.

Tony felt his heart sink then. He couldn't ask him to stay.

He couldn't.

This trip meant everything to Stephen. Everything. It was his last shot to fix his hands and he couldn't take that away from him.

"Fuck," said Tony under his breath.

"I think I'm seriously going to regret letting you fuck me so hard when I've to sit for like a day long flight to Nepal," said Stephen as he came back into the room. "You okay?" he asked as he saw Tony hunched over on the sofa.

Tony looked up at him. This is what Stephen wanted. This medical procedure, whatever it was would cure him. He'd come back to New York to work and he'd start earning money again and maybe they'd go out for dinner or he could stay here until he got a new apartment sorted and they could talk about restarting their relationship then.

Everything would be okay when he came back from Nepal. They could start again then.

As Tony cleaned himself up and watched Stephen as he struggled to zip up his backpack he couldn't help but wonder what would happen if this procedure Stephen was going for didn't work. He had already lost his apartment and his money, he didn't have a job at the hospital anymore either. He had already lost everything and this was his last shot. What if he didn't come home? What if one last no was too much for him and he decided to end it all?

Tony could feel a sense of panic rising in his chest, he hadn't felt like this in months.

Stephen looked over to him and furrowed his brow. "Are you okay?"

Tony looked at him then. He could say it now. Don't go. Stay with me. Please, just don't go.

But he didn't.

Tony smiled ruefully. "I'm fine," he said. He took his keys from the coffee table. "We really will miss your flight if we don't get going, Strange so come on."

Stephen laughed and kissed Tony deeply, one last time. There was a part of him that didn't want to go. When he was with Tony he didn't think of his hands. When Tony was kissing him, he didn’t feel the pain in his hands and he didn’t notice the tremor. Over the last couple of hours, he had kept thinking of what Christine had said to him before she left, "there are other things that can give your life meaning". He'd been too angry and self-obsessed to really process what she said then but now when he was with Tony he felt she had been right. He could stay here with him. He could never go back into surgery again but what if he did try becoming a consultant? It could work... But the voice in his head that told him nobody would take the advice off a man who couldn't write his name was roaring in his ear. His anger and self-loathing had pushed Christine away... What if he did the same to Tony? What if Tony couldn't handle him? What if he couldn't control his anger around Tony? Stephen couldn't bear with the thought of ruining Tony's life. He had already ruined his own, he couldn't be guilty of ruining Tony's life too. He just... couldn't.

Tony didn't want the kiss to end. He wanted to stay in this moment forever. He didn't want to let Stephen go. However, too soon, Stephen broke the kiss. He looked down at Tony.

"Thanks again, Tone," said Stephen. "Seriously. You've saved me."

Tony reached up and brushed the errant cur away from Stephen's forehead. He took in the sight of Stephen then. His beautiful soft hair, the crinkles at his eyes when he smiled. The eyes the colour of the ocean and his perfect pink plump lips. If this was going to be the last time he would ever see the man he loved he was going to remember it.

He squeezed Stephen's hands reassuringly and kissed him one last time. Neither of them wanted the kiss to end because both of them knew what was going to happen when it was over. All too soon they broke apart and with once last rueful look at each other they headed towards the door. Without another word they left the apartment hand in hand, both lost in their own thoughts and neither ready or willing to share how they felt to one another as they stepped out into the dark and cold New York City night.

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