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Dating 101

Summary:

In which everyone tries to hit on the gloomy bat.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Superman glanced sideways to where Batman was sitting, who's deeply immersed in front of the Watchtower computer, and kept staring. Even with the cowl on, the man was still impossible to look away from. He then zoomed in on his heartbeat, steady and strong, along with the clicking of keyboards, and continued sipping his coffee with the rhythmic melody in his ears.


Then Green Lantern came in. Drawling as always and ignoring Clark, he leaned next to Batman and watched him work for some minutes. Bruce was, as usual, was all work and paid the intruder no attention. Clark, on the other hand, was struggling to keep his patience at bay, and watching the green-cladded hero lean in further into Bruce's private space was not helping.


"You want to take over monitor duty, Hal? That's very unusual of you." Batman's tone was frighteningly neutral, but Green Lantern was too busy flirting to notice. "Oh, it was getting lonely in the canteen, so I'd thought I'd like some company." He answered, putting one of his elbows on Batman's shoulder and the other one on his hip, leaning in further.


Superman groaned inwardly. Ever since Batman's identity reveal last week, after the initial shock of his teammates, now everyone is trying to hit on Bruce Wayne. Arthur is more dominating and bossy, Barry is always circling Batman in super speed and telling jokes, and Hal is...well...more Hal. The only unaffected were Diana and Shayera, who are dating one another.


Batman stopped typing and looked up at Green Lantern, whose grinning face was mere inches away. "Superman is here, if you need company. Now if you'd excuse me, some of us actually have work to do." Batman said, stood up, and began making his way for the door.


Hal straightened up a bit too quickly. "Wa-ait! Where are you going?" He asked in a panicky voice.
Batman glowered. "I'm taking your duty of surveillance, since you so kindly offered to take up mine. Superman, keep him busy." Clark stammered a reply, and looked at Hal, who's staring in utter disbelief at Batman.


Batman held his stare for a few seconds, then turned and marched out, his cape flaring out behind him in devastating effect.


~


After the duties, Superman finally got a chance to hang out with the bat. He got some coke from the vending machine, and Batman, as usual, got black coffee.


"Hey Bruce..." Clark started awkwardly, wanting to talk about the incident earlier. Bruce cocked his head slightly in response. "So, about what happened earlier, do yo-"


A gust of wind stopped him mid-sentence, then there was a red blur around Batman, circling a few times before disappearing as swiftly as it came.


Batman resumed sipping his coffee as if surprise were meant for lesser men.


Annoyed, Superman turned back to Batman. "So, as I was saying...wait, what's that on your tissue?"


Batman raised an invisible eyebrow and looked down on his tissue paper held underneath the coffee can. "Did he just-" Batman took it from its squashed position and discovered that there was ink on it.


Hey Bats! : D Wanna hang out sometime or, you know, have dinner at some posh place at Gotham? :DD -Barry


"Interesting. Now Barry is developing similar symptoms as Green Lantern. There must be some kind of drugs affecting the League from the last mission at Oa." Batman tucked the tissue back, his expression indifferent. "Until the computers analysed anything, I want you to keep an eye on the rest of the League, make sure that it doesn’t have any other effects." And with a dramatic swirl, he stomped out, darkness condensing around him.
Clark resisted the urge to smack himself in the face.


~


Although Batman told Clark not to look out for him on purpose, or “spying” as he’d called it, Clark still wanted to do it, just to make sure that no one else tries to take his boyfriend away. He felt kind of guilty for breaching the trust, but his possessiveness was too strong. Trying to look casual sitting in the canteen, he used his x-ray vision on the lab, and spotted Batman and Aquaman, the latter watching Bruce’s every move.


“Hey Batman, I wanted to thank you for saving my life back there at conference meeting. You know, the one you dumped me into salt water so I won’t dry out?” Aquaman said, arms crossed.


Batman replied without looking from his microscope. “That was ages ago, Arthur.”


“Yea, but then I felt like thanking you soooo…” Arthur took a dazzling necklace off his neck and inspected it. Clark could physically feel his hair whitening. “I know you’d probably prefer black jewels, but I guess this is alright. Maybe wear it in one of your charity galas or something.” Arthur handed over the necklace. Hesitantly, Bruce took it and held it in the light.


“These are some very fine gems, Arthur. Atlantis?” Batman asked.


“Yes, and very special ones too. Only one person can be allowed to have it.” Arthur grinned. Bruce raised one eyebrow in questioning. “And who’s that?”


“The Queen.”


Clark groaned and smacked his head on the table, causing a huge dent.


“So doesn’t this belong to Mera?” Bruce looked back at his microscope.


Arthur smiled triumphantly. “Yea, but I want you to have it.”


“Humph, thank you, then.” Bruce placed it on the table and went back to his microscope, more silent than ever, a huge contrast to Arthur, who waltzed out the lab as if he’d just banned sushi consumption. Clark got up and flew away before he saw him, his veins full of frustration.


~


“And that is Plan G. Does everyone know what they’re supposed to do?” Batman glared around the meeting table. Seeing nods, he continued. “Any questions?”


Superman’s hand shot into the air, Batman nodded for him to speak. He stood up, “I don’t actually have a question, but I would like to propose a new rule for the Justice League.”


If Batman was surprised, he didn’t show any sign of it. “Go on, Superman.”


“Well…no casual dating is allowed in the League. You know, like trying to hit on someone even though they are dating someone else.”


Uneasy glances were shared among the table except the two girls, who didn't seem to mind. Barry coughed.
“That was…unexpected, Superman. What, are you jealous?” Batman asked with half an evil grin.


The effect was immediate and catastrophic. Everyone widened their eyes in disbelief and some in hopeless defeat. Clark turned redder than his cape. “Wha-ah no! Nonononono I just think that…you know what I mean…//Just announce the rule! // “ He added in Kryptonian.


Batman smirked. “Alright then, if our handsome leader demands so, then the rule is passed without the need to vote. The next meeting will be on Monday.” Everyone in the room was still in shock, their brains struggling to process what the heck just happened. Batman ignored them and swept out of the room. Superman hurried after him, nearly tripping over his cape in the process.


“Did you just announce our relationship to the League, Bruce?” Clark asked when they reached the teleporter.
“Why yes I did. Problem?” Bruce asked.


“Well, I thought you wanted to keep it a secret.”


“They’re going to find out sooner or later. And you started it.” Bruce teased, poking a finger at the Superman emblem.


“Fine, but they were trying to take you away from me! I couldn’t just do nothing!” Clark whined.


“Did you forget that I am a billionaire playboy.”


“Don’t you ever say that again.” Clark dropped his tone.


Bruce was perplexed by the sudden change of emotion. “Why?”


"Because you're mine." Moving forward at super speed, he kissed Bruce, pouring out all his frustration and the joy of having him back in the kiss.


They broke apart, panting for breath. Bruce face has a slight pink shade, the one Clark adored the most. “You want me to suffocate, Kent?” Bruce joked.


Clark laughed and went back to fondling with the teleporter’s controls with a smile that cannot be inverted. “See you back in Gotham then.”


“Dinner at my place tonight? Alfred’s making cookies.”


“You bet.” Clark checked the coordinates once more. “Ready?”


Batman nodded, and Superman pushed the teleportation button. And with a glowing white light, Batman was back in his city.


Waiting until the very last particles has disappeared, Clark turned and headed back into the Watchtower center, only to find it thoroughly empty. Everyone, it seems, had left in a hurry.


Oh well, at least I don’t have to share my chips anymore. Clark thought, collapsing onto a recliner, whisked out a bag of chips, and munched in content.

Notes:

My first crappy attempt at a Superbat fic.
Tell me what you guys think! :)