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Sam finished adjusting his tie in front of the cracked bathroom mirror.
Although he wasn't particularly vain about his looks, he knew that both he and Dean definitely rendered at their best in a suit.
He was aware that women found them both attractive and that Dean had no qualms about using all his god-given attributes in finding female company wherever and whenever he felt like it.
Sam sighed.
He wished he had that easy demeanor towards the fairer sex. His relationships with girls were, to say the least, "complicated."
Even during his college years with Jess things hadn't been entirely honest and straightforward. He'd hidden the hunting part of his life from her and in so doing had contributed to her death.
Yeah, he understood now that he'd been surrounded by demons back then, but he should've been more careful. Jess's death would haunt him forever.
His later attempts hadn't fared any better; Madison to whom he'd been instantly attracted had turned out to be a werewolf; then the whole Ruby affair had been an immense tragedy leading to nothing short of the Apocalypse. Yeah, great call, Sam!
After Ruby, however, he'd become cautious, withdrawing from any relationship that wasn't a one-night stand, and even that only when he felt he'd explode if he didn't have at least the occasional sexual release.
He envied Dean's casual approach to sex but he'd always needed to form some tenuous connection with a girl before feeling at ease in going further.
Just add it to the list of freaky Sam Winchester quirks, he thought ironically.
Once his greatest desire had been to get away from the life of danger and fear his father had brought them up in..
He'd railed against it since that Christmas when he'd been nine years old and Dean had finally revealed the truth to him. Of course, he'd suspected something was up beforehand, but John was such a powerful presence that it was difficult to get anything out of him that he wasn't willing to share.
He understood why Dean hadn't told him until it was absolutely necessary.
Dean had been his protector. No! Dean had been his everything from as far back as he could remember. His big brother had known instinctively that Sam's childish self would have been upset in finding out the true implications of the life they led, and he'd tried to protect his little brother. Something he continued to do even now that Sam was six feet four of pure muscle.
Whatever would he have done without Dean?
His brother knew everything about him, how to comfort him, make him laugh, how to lighten the atmosphere and pull him out of his broody funks when they came over him.
Dean had, and still did so much for him, and what did he give him in return, nothing but worry and complications.
"Sam!" his brother's voice rang out as he burst into the bathroom, his energetic presence filling the small room.
"What the Hell are you still doing in here? We're not going to the Presidential Ball you know, only to get a few answers to some questions about a case. I swear you're worse than a freakin' girl!"
"I'm ready, Dean; I was just finishing up with the tie," Sam answered casually, downplaying his delay in exiting the bathroom.
"Sam! Look at me!" his brother ordered.
"Huh, I knew it, " Dean stated, studying his younger brother. "Puppy-eyes about to glaze over! Sam Winchester brood-fest phase one. Good job I caught it early, it's easier to defuse at this stage. Dude, this is not the time for your soul-searching hog-wash!
We're on a case here, so don't let that freaky brain of yours go off on a tangent."
"Off on a tangent" Dean! I swear your vocabulary is improving the older you get," Sam huffed, annoyed that Dean could always instantly sense his mood swings. "Anyway, you're wrong this time. I wasn't brooding," he retorted. "I was simply thinking!"
"Shut up, Sam! I know every notion that goes through that stubborn head of yours 'cos I raised you and I can read you like a book, so don't try and tell me what you're thinking! "
"Right. You're a telepath now, Dean. We'll add that to your list of talents. You can't know what I'm thinking! It's impossible! I don't care how well you think you know me!"
"'Kay. The hunting life is a douche! You always wanted normal and you couldn't have it! You have a problem when it comes to casual sex and you think you're weighing me down, and that I'd be better off without you. How'm I doin'? " Dean smirked.
Sam's eyes opened impossibly wide and he felt the words of denial about to burst through his lips but the sight of Dean's grinning face stopped them dead in their tracks. A smile started to curl around his mouth, erupting into a full-blown laugh, relieving all the tension that had been building up inside him.
"What did I tell you, Sammy?" Dean crowed as he hammered home his win." I CAN read you like a book, so get your ass out of here and let's get to work!"
Sam followed his brother meekly out to the Impala, still metaphorically shaking his head at his brother's intuition.
He stole a glance at him from under his eyelashes as Dean circled the Impala to the driver's side. He was beginning to wonder if his brother did have telepathic powers. Well, stranger things had happened in their lives after all.
As if he'd heard what Sam was thinking, Dean met his eyes and winked.
The End