Chapter Text
"The first time you see Bruce Wayne coolly empty a gun into someone's head, it is disquieting. The second time? You get used to it," Lex thought a bit ironic as he was running beside a fleeing Bruce Wayne in full Batman mode.
"Do you really think the stairs are a good idea?" Lex had to breathlessly ask.
The man simply sent him a glare. Of course, Bruce never explained anything. Especially not when a black-haired, white-faced superpowered humanoid monster was chasing you.
"I'm gonna catch you, little mouse," the thundering voice echoed from below.
Bruce threw down some objects that exploded below.
"You are going to bring down the building on us!" Lex complained.
The other man simply ignored him again as they ran into a hallway. Nobody was following them.
"I can't run anymore," Lex admitted. The other billionaire took an exasperating look at him and nodded, "We should have stalled him long enough," he told as he aimed the third gun he had pickpocketed away toward the empty hall.
The black-bearded man broke out from the floor, yelling, "No more tricks!"
Bruce emptied, for the third time today, his (stolen) gun into the man's head. It barely slowed him down. No facial muscles changed in Bruce's face as he threw knives with his free hand at the almost invulnerable monster.
Sure enough, the man simply blocked with his arm, "You really made me work to catch you, but there are no more places to hide. It's over." He moved forward to catch Bruce.
Bruce ducked under the arm and appeared behind the man, scrambling away as the invulnerable mountain turned again.
Then, there was a familiar looking blur of blue and red pushing the monster into the opposing wall.
Great.
Superman was the one "saving" them.
"Lobo, why are you attacking them?" the ever-gentlemanly Superman demanded as if talking to a misbehaving child.
"Bounty, of course. Now, get out of the way of my job," the black-haired mountain answered while uppercutting Superman in the chin. Superman crashed into the ceiling, breaking it cleanly.
Monsters and Gods. Any fights between them could 'accidentally' kill ant-like humans.
Speaking of humans, Bruce was not simply staring at Lobo as Lex was doing. He had disappeared again.
Still, the explosions in the other room must be his handiwork.
Lex's hand was tugged in a direction and he followed after it, thinking Bruce would have a better idea where they should be headed to avoid being captured by this Lobo monster.
"Hey! Stop running away!" Lobo screamed somewhere in the background.
Lex felt the floor shake after something or someone crashed into it. Smoke was obscuring his vision and he was tired of running, "Your plan is terrible," he told Bruce in an afterthought.
The hand holding his only pulled harder as if to force his pace in a hall filled with smoke and holes as they felt more impacts on the floor, ceiling or walls.
Finally, they stumbled on the scene of Superman holding Lobo's black jacket bunched in his fists. The superhero was staring down disapprovingly at the other, "Stop destroying things. I don't have time to play with you."
Lobo snorted, "Ha, you never have time to play. I'm just do'ng my job. I'm a bounty hunter, you know. It's a frag world and all."
Superman responded, "I'm going to send your bike stuck outside into the sun if you don't stop trying to capture the person you have been seeking."
Lex would have been impressed by Superman's observational skills if not for the glance he saw the superhero send in Bruce's direction. Then, it became clear his 'friend' was feeding lines to Superman to use as a threat.
Bruce was the one having sent something similar to bubble-gum in the bike's front wheel. It had successfully stopped it from working.
"DON'T TOUCH MY RIDE!" Lobo bellowed with true vexation. His nonchalant face was suddenly deadly serious.
"Only if you tell us why you were chasing them and that you stop trying to get that bounty," serious speaking Superman replied in his tough-guy mode.
"Fine," Lobo answered, "The bounty wasn't that high anyway."
Lex and Bruce stepped closer to the two almost invulnerable individuals. Superman let down the other man and Bruce's hand was no longer holding Lex's.
"Well", Lobo said, cracking his neck, "a collector sends bounties for everyone appearing in this video gaining traction in the GN-z11 sector."
Superman crossed his arms over his chest, trying to look severe. In Lex's opinion, it was a failure.
"What video?"
"Wait a minute. I have it here. I'll put the subtitles on," Lobo said as he found a machine and activated it.
It was something akin to a touristic promotional video of Earth with Superman, Green Lantern, Green Arrow, the Martian, Wonder Woman and Flash appearing in it. As well as Bruce Wayne slapping an alien...
Lex quirked an eyebrow at Bruce while crossing his arms, trying to convey his thoughts of Batman getting into a touristic promotional video of Earth for aliens in his civilian's identity. That was a dumb idea and no matter how you looked at Bruce (except for his emotional side), he was not stupid.
Bruce just shook his head and Superman looked guilty for some reason or another. There was definitively a story behind all of this.
"Why did you try to catch this man and not the others?" Superman asked Lobo, obviously trying to change the subject.
Lobo played with his giant cigar, "The bounty wasn't high enough to be worth fighting the League. I was waiting until bounty hunters would go for you and fail, driving the price up. The bounty was good enough to catch a defenceless civilian, although this one sure knows how to defend himself."
A red flash rushed by, stopping near Superman. The red creature let out, "What?Everythingisalreadyundercontrol?"
Superman nodded in Flash's direction, "Yes. Lobo and I reached an understanding and no civilians were harmed during the fight." Lex knew it had been Bruce idea to escape the charitable event and go to an unpopulated area.
"AndLexLuthorwasabletodefendhimselffromLobosincethecallforhelp?Thatisimpressive!" Flash answered.
Superman stilled at that. Lobo opened his mouth, probably to specify it was the one with hair who had shot and thrown knives at him.
In a flash, Lex understood Flash had no idea Bruce Wayne was Batman, however, Superman knew it.
"I eat human hearts for breakfast," Lex quipped before he could stop himself.
Flash blinked at Lex, uncertain whether it was a joke or not while Superman frown at him, pensively.
The bald man knew Bruce would be glaring at him and probably accusing him of having bad improvising skills if not for Flash being ignorant he was Batman. As it were, Bruce simply smiled dazzlingly at them.
Lobo laughed and slapped heartily Lex's back, "That was hilarious! Human hearts are so disgusting!"
Lex had to swallow his pride. He was not on Lobo's level and hated to be treated as an inferior's companion. He grinned unamused at him, "Yes... They sure are."
Flash appeared on the other side of Superman as if putting the superhero between himself and the villains. Bruce simply walked forward, "I think I should go back. My date is still waiting for me."
"Your date?" Flash's bulging eyes seemed to indicate he feared more Bruce than Lex, even though he thought it likely Lex was eating hearts for breakfast.
Lex wasn't sure he wanted to know what Bruce had done to scare away his fellow superhero this much in his civilian's identity.
"Yes," Bruce answered with a stupid grin, "Do you want to come too? There is a lot of food."
Flash hid more completely behind Superman before waving goodbye, "Ifitisall, Ihavetogoback.Bye!" There was red flash and only a disapproving Superman, a ditzy looking billionaire, an unhappy Lex and a much too friendly villain.
"This is all fun and all, but I got to get my ride back in shape."
Bruce dropped his stupid smile, "Water dissolves the material around your wheel."
Lobo back slapped Lex one last time, propelling forward the billionaire, and he said, "It was good knowing you folks. You're both cool in my books. I won't kidnap you again for this bounty, kid."
With that, the overenthusiastic villain walked away leaving smudges of mud in the shape of his ridiculous boots' heels. Lex frowned at his departure. There was decisively no class to that act.
Lex had time to note Bruce was looking a tad too long and longingly at Superman before starting on the stairs, leaving Superman and Lex alone in a semi-demolished hallway. Lex ignored the other man as he made his way to the stairs.
"Wait," Superman ordered.
Lex stopped and turned to face his archenemy, the God everyone was so scared of upsetting. Lex knew better than that.
No God would ever dictate his destiny.
"Why should I?" Lex demanded while using his well-practiced businessman's tone. This was a degrading way to treat him considering their past association.
Superman flinched a tiny bit at the harsh tone, "You haven't attacked me or tried to take over the world for over a month. What are you planning?"
Ah. This was about Lex's lack of evil plotting in the last while. Lex liked making the superhero squirm under pressure and not doing anything evil seemed to get under Superman's skin.
This was an unexpected advantage to being "good". Maybe Lex should do it more often as a mean to confuse his enemies.
"I don't know why I should inform you of my plans," Lex responded in a severe voice.
Superman hovered an inch off the ground, looking more menacing than usual, "Are you trying to convince him you have reformed? Because we both know it is untrue."
Superman, with all his godly powers, was more worried Lex was somehow conning Batman than about Lex's trying to take over the world. The bald man was unsure if his pride as a supervillain was injured or not. Conning Batman for long periods of time seemed quite an achievement.
At the same time, it made Lex think Clark thought he had been conning Clark when they had been together. When Lex had been Clark's friend, a long time ago, he had tried to change for Clark's sake. It had been difficult all the way through. Everyone thought Lex was doomed to become exactly like his father.
Growing up had been an upstream battle.
Adults were always comparing him to his father. Kids tried to emulate adults' behaviour, each testing his intelligence, wisdom, knowledge and cunning and ridiculing him at every opportunity. It didn't take time for Lex to craft a mask for every circumstance. A mask of superiority and indifference. Lex knew he had to outmanoeuvre everyone to be someone in life.
Clark had been the exception. He had wanted to be his friend despite appearances.
Lex had wanted more because this was the closest emotional connection he had in his life except for his deceased mother. He had treasured the opportunity.
Nonetheless, as much as Clark wanted to give Lex a chance, Clark had never really trusted Lex. He would half-heartedly pretend he believed in Lex. That proved to be both of their undoings.
Lex really tried to change, however, he couldn't endure anymore Clark's face filled with disappointment as his hopes in Lex were dashed one incident after another.
Lex had known Clark was slipping away, without either ever verbalizing it. The more Lex promised to change, the more desperate he was to hold on to the emotional connection, the more it slipped through his grasp.
Lex could scrupulously remember how it felt to wake up alone in his bed with the breeze from a then open window. Clark had never been his. But when even the small space he had inhabited with Clark had flown away, distant and godlike, Lex's heart had broken. Perfect Superman couldn't stand an imperfect and soiled soul like Lex's and Lex's heart still yearned for him.
Lex had known back then, staring at the open window Clark had not bothered to close, he was as powerless of stopping Clark from going as he was of stopping wind of drifting away.
Still, Lex thrived in adversity. Nothing pushed him more to excellence than the impossible. Maybe Lex couldn't become good enough for Superman, however, he sure could drag down a God to his level and prove Clark was not the perfect otherworldly being he always pretended he was.
Superman didn't think Lex could change because Lex had failed many times before. He didn't realize Lex's motivations had changed.
Back then, Lex had wanted to please Clark and get everyone's approval on their dating.
Nowadays, Lex thought of Tim and Bruce. He wasn't really after anyone's approval as much as weighing the pros and cons of continuing using his usual methods.
Lex did want to continue seeing Tim. He wasn't stupid enough to believe Bruce would let him enjoy the boy's presence if the vigilante thought harm would befall Tim or if Lex was using Tim as a piece in his plan to conquer the world. Truthfully, this would not completely stop most of Lex's plotting. Except it was clear, after the famous Al Ghul incident, that Tim and Bruce tended to get involved in danger that wasn't aimed at them. Furthermore, Bruce wouldn't let Lex around Tim if he did not believe Lex could be a good influence.
Hence, Lex had to be the responsible and non-evil adult around Tim. Which is why he cut down on his world-dominating schemes for now. If Lex's ties with Bruce, Tim and Alfred were irrevocably cut, he would resume his former hobbies.
Moreover, contrary to Clark, Bruce didn't even try pretending trusting Lex. The two important differences were the following. One, with a few exceptions, Bruce did not trust anyone. Two, Bruce may not trust Lex, however, he still believed Lex could change.
It may seem similar, but it was not.
When Alfred had told Lex Bruce believed in redemption, Lex thought the old butler was exaggerating. Truth was, Lex could now believe, Bruce actually and sincerely believed Joker could change. Since the moment Lex had thought so, he understood how insane Bruce was. If Lex could think of one constant in this universe, it was that Joker would always be a sick psychopath.
Furthermore, Bruce seemed to understand Lex's perspective of the world. Bruce did not think himself better than Lex. He might believe he was putting more efforts into doing the right thing, that was all. Both were fallible men.
In conclusion, Lex did not feel the crushing expectations placed on himself. He could still be a prideful and flawed man to enjoy Tim's, Alfred's and Bruce's companies. Bruce only asked his family and friend be never put in danger because of Lex's plotting. It was much more manageable expectations to achieve.
Insofar as his promise to behave bound him, Lex understood he still completely hated Superman. That was not going to change soon.
Lex ignored Superman's comment and headed toward the exit.
"Lex," Superman's deceitful archangelic voice declared, "Do not harm him."
That settled any doubts Lex had until then. It was clear Bruce was in love with Superman from the previous behaviour exhibited today as well as other clues in the previous month and a half. Superman's request simply confirmed they were "together".
Lex felt the hard twist in his heart like the burning sensation of a plunging knife. It almost made him spout poisonous words. He was too proud to let himself look jealous so he simply changed tactics, "Superman, I am fully aware of what he is to you and what you are to him."
Clark was startled and tried to hide it, but Lex knew him better than to be fooled by appearances.
At Lex's pointed look, Clark ventured a question, "How do you know?"
Lex shrugged, "From the extreme measures you have both taken to keep it silent, I believe you can guess how I learned it."
Clark's suspicious face observed his, "How?"
"He told me," Lex answered with a mocking smirk as if the answer was obvious and Clark was a fool for not having thought of it.
There were torment and some betrayal filtering in Clark's face. Good, Lex thought, this feels so much more satisfying than throwing insults at him.
"I should congratulate you, Clark. You did keep your word," Lex insinuated with the taunting tone he normally used when he knew something Clark didn't.
"What?" a baffled Clark answered.
"Congratulations, you stole my boyfriend," Lex smiled with the air of superiority of someone knowing an inside joke the other was not made aware of.
Clark glared at him until Lex's phone beeped. He took it out and read Bruce's text, "Are you coming? The reporters will want to ask you questions."
"He's waiting for me," Lex told Clark apologetically, "I have to go. He and I have a lot to do together before the end of the day. As for harming him, why should I? We get along well enough together." At those words, Lex went downstairs. He knew Clark had used his power to verify if it had been Bruce texting him.
This was fun, Lex thought dryly, as he continued his way down.
Of course, it did hurt Clark and Bruce were dating, but, in reality, Lex theorized he was spending more time with Bruce than Clark was.
The reporters had caught on that even after their separation a month ago, Lex and Bruce would spend more time together in events even though they were "dating" other people. Tim would also be seen talking with Lex at any events they attended together. There were rumours Bruce and Lex had "broken" up for reasons other than romantic aspirations, but that they were still secretly dating one another. Lex did nothing to quell those stories.
It didn't hurt that Bruce needed pauses from pretending he was an idiot at each event and he didn't need to keep acting around Lex. It also didn't harm anyone that Lex went to the Manor several times over the last month.
Lex winced at the thought of visiting the Wayne Manor. He had been caught in traps Damian and Tim had set for the other. If Lex didn't think it would be used against him, he would always carry a taser with him going into that particular battlefield. It didn't take Lex long to figure out Tim was a rational and reasonable young man in everything except when it concerned Damian.
Lex liked Tim and Alfred. Damian? Not so much, since the kid hated him. Nonetheless, Lex was smart enough to know Bruce would spend more time with you if it was also with his family. Instead of cutting into Bruce's precious time dedicated to his duties, you had to push him into spending more time with his family. Alfred was almost always an ally in those endeavours and Bruce felt so guilty he wasn't there for his children, it was easy to guilt-trip him.
I am truly a master tactician, Lex thought as he met Bruce waiting for him at the bottom of the stairs. Sure, spending more time with Bruce did not equate being his lover, but it did give you access to his family's life, which was more than Clark could say about his relationship with Bruce.
Bruce blinked at him, probably wondering what Superman and Lex had to say to one another.
"He was worried I was up to something because I hadn't done anything wrong recently," Lex explained. Bruce only lowered his chin, taking in Lex.
Bruce's intense stare was always intimidating and Lex could see how petty criminals would admit everything to him. The bald man was also aware Bruce was better at reading body language than he was. Lex had decided it was much simpler, to tell the truth to Bruce when they were alone. You simply needed to omit information and carefully word your statements. Still, Lex always had the uncomfortable feeling Bruce knew when Lex was hiding something. Thankfully, the other man rarely pressed for more information.
Before walking outside the building, Bruce gave Lex the three guns he had used. Lex stared at him, "Why are you giving me the guns?"
Bruce tilted his head in confusion, "Because you were the one having shot Lobo, it has to have your fingerprints on it."
As much as Lex liked the black-haired man standing next to him, he wanted to strangle Bruce. Lex was the smartest human alive and Bruce kept thinking Lex was slow in catching up to Batman's thinking. That was annoying.
"You knew Lobo wasn't trying to catch me since the beginning," Lex stated.
Bruce acknowledged it with a small nod.
"But you still dragged me into your fight. I thought you were supposed to keep civilians safe, not drag them into your fights."
Bruce just blankly looked at him as if his reason for dragging Lex into a fight with an almost invulnerable bounty hunter/assassin was evident.
"I'm not putting my fingerprints on the guns until you explain why I was dragged into your superhero business," Lex crossed his arms over his chest.
Bruce sighed, "Bruce Wayne does not know how to fight, except for some basic self-defence moves. Lex Luthor has been known to be an expert marksman and be trained by some important self-defence experts."
"Wait a minute. I do train, but it is not public knowledge," Lex contested.
"In a Russian article published seven years, there was a hint you liked shooting guns to pass your time. In an obscure article publish in Italy almost twenty years ago, there were mentions you had trained with famous self-defence experts. Five years ago, a video was posted online with you fighting off someone trying to assassinate you. There was a few more mentions or sightings. It is common knowledge you know how to defend yourself," Bruce finished with an exasperated face at having to explain something so basic.
Lex glowered at him, "That is not the real reason you dragged me into this. You have successfully managed to stall villains or assassins without needing external help before today."
"The real reason I dragged you into this was that there was no danger involved since Lobo simply wanted to capture me. It helped the public's perspective of me being helpless. More importantly, it kept you busy," Bruce huffed.
"What do you mean, it kept me busy?" Lex's patience in dissecting Bruce's convoluted thinking was quickly waning.
Bruce studied him, clearly wondering how much he should reveal to Lex, "You might not have done anything wrong lately, but you are bored. Bored talented people are a terrible combination. It is easier for you to relapse if you think life is boring without your usual stimulations."
"So," Lex started, trying not to lose his temper, "you think I am addicted to plotting world domination?"
"I haven't said that. I simply think you are wasting your potential away in boredom. I am sure there are worthy projects out there," Bruce carefully replied.
Lex had to take a moment to consider Bruce's rationale.
It was true Lex was becoming increasingly bored and he had wished for some action, nonetheless, Lex was not a masochist like Bruce and he certainly did not enjoy physical battles with invulnerable monsters while not wearing indestructible armour.
"Next time, Bruce, you want to use my resources for "good", I would recommend you propose a project. Your idea of dragging me into a physical fight with monsters is not an ideal way to resolve my boredom," Lex had to explain with a thin voice.
Bruce cocked his head again as if Lex was the one not making sense, "But you liked being a hero."
Lex stared at Bruce, realization dawning on him.
This was the second time Bruce was pushing him into the hero's role: the first being with Riddler. Lex could admit to himself he had liked the adrenaline and the acclaims the first time he had acted like a "hero" had given him even though he had been vexed at Bruce's manipulation.
This meant Bruce had been strategizing, since the beginning of their "association", of transforming Lex into a Justice League's asset. The bald man wasn't sure if he should be impressed by Bruce's manipulation techniques or not.
Alfred's words came back to him. Bruce believed in redemption.
It seems Bruce had decided keeping Lex busy with good "things" would help him discard world dominating schemes Lex's mind kept producing.
"Fine," Lex said as he took the guns, "I'll pretend to be a stupid billionaire rushing into physical fights for adrenaline's sake. I'm still mad at you."
Bruce nodded as he thought it was a good reaction. Most people would be so angry at being manipulated they would normally refuse to talk to him for a long while. Despite Lex's bad character, Lex was easier to get along with than most people, the billionaire thought as they started toward another chaotic journey.
***
N: How did it go?
R: As usual. B was attacked by Lobo in the middle of the fundraising and he refused our help in the matter. The Demon kid almost attacked curious reporters. A saved the day.
RH: A is awesome.
BB: He is.
S: If I were to be reincarnated, I'd want to be him or a waffle.
O: I will regret asking, but why a waffle?
S: I ate so much of them, it would only be fair I contributed to the cause.
N: What exactly did A do?
Red Robin (Damian), RR hereafter: He stopped me from murdering the noisy reporters. Father would not have been happy.
RH: B is never happy.
R: I don't know about that. I heard him humming the other day.
N: Poison?
S: Impostor?
RR: That is ridiculous. He would never hum. Only losers hum.
R: Well, he did.
RR: I would have seen it. I have much better observational skills than you.
R: Really? I am pulling up the video for everyone to see you are wrong.
N: Stop it! Remember last time?
O: I'm willing to ban both of you from the batchat if you don't behave.
RH: I don't believe it. It is B humming.
BB: B is happy.
S: WHAT HAPPENED?
N: A? What happened?
R: Is he even here at this time of the day?
A: I am always where I am needed, Master R.
RH: I knew it! A is the Master of circumstances.
O: True. We should probably make you a costume.
S: A, Ô knowledgeable master, kindly inform this ignorant group on why B is humming. I urgently need my batdrama fix.
A: Master B is humming because he is happy.
N: When did this happen?
A: Master RH is back in town. Mistress BB won the dance competition Master B attended. Masters R and RR have not substantially destroyed any part of the house for the first week since they started living in the same house. I believe Master has good reasons to be happy.
S: That's so... anticlimactic.
RH: I was hoping there were villains or magic involved.
O: A, are you sure that is all?
A: It is all I am aware of, Mistress O. It has been a long time since there were no major injuries in this family in a month's time. That is good news, no matter how you say it. I have some cooking to attend to.
Alfred has disconnected.
O: He is hiding something...
S: A or B?
O: Both.
BB: B is happy.
N: Like really happy?
RH: He hums. How much happier can you imagine him?
N: Smiling at everyone and hugging everyone?
R: Disturbing...
RR: I hate agreeing with you on anything, but I am forced to admit it is a disturbing imagery.
RH: N, you need some serious help if you can actually picture the old man smiling and hugging everyone without thinking mind control.
O: N is a hopeless optimist, it is not his fault the rest of us are cynics.
S: I'm not a cynic, but I am shivering at the image of a smiling Bruce going around and killing people with hugs. It makes for an amazing horror movie idea.