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“So what is this game you want me to play?”
“It’s called Two Truths and a Lie.”
“Subtle.”
“So will you play?”
“You know better than to think I’d commit to anything on so little information, doctor.”
“Fine, I’ll explain – we take turns. We each make three statements, two of which are true and one which is the lie. It can’t be stuff we already know about each other. You can’t say, ‘I’m a tailor.’ for example. And It’s absolutely forbidden to tell three lies.”
“I take it there’s no telling three truths, either?”
“Hardly a concern with you.”
“Touche. And what happens after we make our respective statements?”
“The other person has to guess which statements are true, and which statement is a lie.”
“I see.”
“Will you play?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Come on, Garak – please?”
“I may be persuaded to play a slightly different version.”
“That version being?”
“Two Lies and a Truth.”
“Deal.”
“That was quick.”
“Any truth is a win with you, Garak.”
“Ah, but that presupposes that you can guess the truth, doctor.”
“I’m willing to take my chances. Do you want me to go first?”
“I’m all ears.”
“All right. I once ate a slug, I once saw Janni Simms in concert, and I once won a prestigious art contest.”
“You ate a slug?”
“It looked like a candy. A sticky candy.”
“Of course it did.”
“But how did you guess so quickly? Forget it, you’re not going to answer me, are you?”
“Good guess.”
“Your turn.”
“All right. Let’s see. I was exiled for writing a scintallating, tell-all anthropomorphic satire about the Obsidian Order featuring Tain as a toad.’
“That’s not true, but I really wish it were.”
“I’m not really Elim Garak. I’m an exiled royal in hiding under an assumed name to protect me from my enemies until I can assume the throne.”
“Cardassia doesn’t have a monarchy.”
“ Are you sure about that? ”
“I’m not sure you’re taking this seriously.”
“Do you want my third statement or not?”
“I am dying of anticipation.”
“Every time we have lunch together I think about ripping off whatever hideous outfit you’re wearing and doing lewd, filthy and possibly illegal things to your naked, panting body.”
“Um.”
“Doctor? Aren’t you going to guess which statement is true?”
“I’m going to, ah, have to think about it. Maybe you can stop by my quarters - say later tonight? We can finish the game then. ”
“I wouldn’t miss it for anything - but you should know by now, doctor, that the game is never finished.”