Work Text:
It was past midnight, again. Reiji wasn't asleep.
Again.
Muttering, Reiji decided to just give up on sleep for the night; if he was going to be awake anyway he might as well get some work done. Quietly, he slipped out of bed and tiptoed out of the room, careful not to wake his juniors. (Tokiya had already caught him awake at three in the morning in the kitchen once. He didn't want to repeat the reassurances and white lies about why he was awake so late again.)
He began walking aimlessly around the agency dorm, going over engagements, songs in the works in his head. Minutes later he found himself outside breathing in the late night air and staring up at the sky. The stars were rather faint tonight, and hard to see. Reiji kept walking, not keeping track of where he went and soon found himself near the lake. He was about to head for the bandstand when he spotted a blond head of hair already in it.
What was Natsuki doing up this late?
“Hey, Nattsun! What are you doing out here?” Reiji said.
Natsuki turned to look at him, surprised. “Ah, Rei-chan-senpai! I was just watching the stars.” He looked back at the sky.
Reiji sat next to him on the steps. “They're beautiful tonight, huh?” He stared up. The stars really were spectacular, even if they weren't as bright as usual.
“Yes! I love coming out here to see them. Especially with winter coming, you can see Orion now!” Natsuki said.
“Really?” Reiji scanned the sky, looking for any sign of the constellation, with no luck. He pouted.
Natsuki laughed kindly and pointed almost directly above them. “There. You see the three stars in a row? That's his belt. And the two stars above it are his shoulders.”
Reiji looked where Natsuki was pointing, finally recognizing it. “Wow, that’s amazing Nattsun! You seem to know a lot.”
“Yes, I've always loved the sky.” He paused. “What about you Rei-chan-senpai? What are you doing up?”
Ah, crap. Reiji chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. “Well, I was having trouble sleeping. So I thought I'd get some work done since I was awake!” The truth couldn't hurt as long as Natsuki didn't come across him again this late.
“Wow, you really are dedicated aren't you Rei-chan-senpai!” Natsuki smiled at him enchantingly.
“Ha ha, it's nothing! We should probably get back to bed though, don't you have a lot of work tomorrow?” Reiji said. He stood up to try and emphasize the point.
Natsuki sighed, taking another glance at the sky. “I do. Watching the stars always clears my head…” he stood up. “But it is late, Ai-chan-senpai will be mad if I don't get enough sleep.”
They walked back together, chatting quietly about work until they parted to head to their separate rooms. Reiji slipped in quietly and tiptoed to his bed, thankful he hadn't woken up his juniors. He settled into bed and closed his eyes. He was a little calmer now, maybe sleep would come more easily this time…
***
Weeks passed normally; filmings, songwriting, performances. Reiji had more sleepless nights than not, as usual. But more and more he found himself walking out onto the grounds and looking up at the sky instead of holing up in an empty room with his work.
Tonight was one of those nights, with Reiji aimlessly looking up at the stars. Things were a little easier to see tonight, but he still had trouble recognizing any constellations…
“Rei-chan-senpai!”
Reiji turned to find Natsuki behind him, holding a thermos in one hand and a blanket in the other. “Nattsun! What brings you out here?” he asked.
“There's a meteor shower tonight, and I wanted to see it...what about you?” Natsuki tilted his head, looking a little concerned.
Ah, what should he say? He didn't want to worry Natsuki with his problems. “I...also came for the meteor shower! I saw it on the news and I thought it'd be interesting.”
Natsuki smiled, looking relieved. “It should be!” He started to spread the blanket and held out the thermos. “Here, it's some tea, to help keep us awake.”
I won't have any trouble with that, Reiji thought as he took the thermos. “That's good thinking Nattsun!” He sat down next to Natsuki on the blanket. “So when are the meteors going to show up? I haven't seen anything so far.”
Natsuki looked up. “It should be starting soon, or at least hit its peak. Then we should see something.”
“Its peak?” Reiji was confused.
“Meteor showers don't happen all at once. The meteors come over a few hours, and there's usually a high point when you can see the most.” Natsuki looked at Reiji and smiled. “That's its peak. The reports I saw said it should be soon…”
Reiji stared at Natsuki, then smiled back. “Wow, you really do know a lot about astronomy don't you!”
Natsuki blushed a little and looked down. “Heh, I guess so. I've just always loved the stars, so I wanted to learn about them and appreciate them more.”
Reiji looked back up at the sky. “Well, you have me interested now! Why don't you tell me about them while we wait for the meteors? I haven't been able to find anything but the Big Dipper.”
Natsuki looked back up. “Well...we can see some more of Orion now that it's clearer out. You remember the belt right?” Reiji nodded. “They're very faint, but another part of the constellation right near it is his sword.” Natsuki pointed, and Reiji followed his arm. “See, right under his belt, there's another three stars leading down.”
Reiji could barely make them out. “Why does he have a sword?”
“It's from his myth! In Greece, Orion was a great hunter…” Natsuki began.
Reiji listened as Natsuki told him about various stars and their stories. He went from Orion, to Taurus, to Sirius, and so on. Reiji found himself captivated, not just by the stars and their stories but by the man next to him. Natsuki's face shone as he spoke, his arm steadily pointing out each location and gesturing at appropriate points in each story.
Once some time had passed, Natsuki offered Reiji some of the tea. Reiji accepted hesitantly, having heard rumors of Natsuki's skills in the kitchen and unsure of how to refuse politely. He was pleasantly surprised by the sweet taste on his tongue, and continued asking Natsuki about what he could see. The two of them slowly settled into a comfortable silence, sipping their tea and staring up.
Reiji broke the silence only when he thought he saw something streak across the sky. “Did you see that, Nattsun?”
Natsuki nodded. “That must be the first meteor!” As he spoke, another streak appeared, then another, and another. Soon, the sky was filled with meteors, and the two men continued gazing up at the sky in wonder.
Reiji whistled as the number of meteors died down, looking at Natsuki. “That really was something, wasn't it?”
Natsuki was still staring up at the last few meteors, smiling widely. “Yes, that's the nicest one I've seen in a while. Though I haven't been able to watch as many with my schedule lately…” he looked over at Reiji. “It was nice to have someone to see it with as well.”
Reiji smiled back. “It was! I almost wish I could stay out here forever.” It was much nicer than laying in the dark staring at the ceiling, with his thoughts having free reign, and more fun than how he usually distracted himself from those thoughts with work.
Natsuki laughed. “Me too! Though we should get back, it's almost early it's so late.” He stood, offering his hand to Reiji.
Reiji sighed exaggeratedly, accepting Natsuki's help in standing. “I suppose so!”
The two of them folded up the blanket and closed up the thermos (Reiji taking one last sip of the delicious tea before Natsuki could get it) and walked back, parting as they had before. Reiji was careful again not to wake his juniors as he entered and slipped under his blankets. If he found it a little easier to fall asleep this time, he didn't notice with the thoughts of the past few hours going through his head.
***
Reiji found himself asking before he could stop himself once he saw Natsuki sitting alone under a tree.
“Hey, Nattsun! Do you think we could go stargazing again soon?” he said.
Natsuki looked up from the book he was reading in surprise and then thought. “Yes, I think there's something interesting happening tonight, how about then?”
“Perfect! See you there!” Reiji replied.
And so, here he was under the bandstand after midnight again. Sleep had been especially difficult to catch the past couple weeks for Reiji, and even he (used to running on very little sleep) had been feeling the effects. But as his thoughts sped through his mind in the middle of the night, he realized that he had gotten at least slightly more restful sleep after those times sitting under the stars with Natsuki. Maybe if he did it again he could get some better sleep tonight, and that would last him for a while. And Natsuki hadn't bugged him too much about being out late before, so maybe he wouldn't again tonight. Hopefully.
He stood as he spotted Natsuki, once again with a blanket and a thermos, and jogged over to meet him.
“Hey, Nattsun! Thanks for agreeing.” Reiji said.
Natsuki smiled, a little reserved. “Of course Rei-chan-senpai! I'm always happy to go stargazing. Though we might have trouble seeing anything tonight after all…”
Reiji looked up. It was true, things weren't as clear as they could be out. “Do you think we should pack it in then?”
Natsuki shook his head and handed Reiji the thermos, then laid down the blanket and sat. “No, there's always a chance it will clear up.” He smiled at Reiji and patted the spot next to him. “Though maybe we won't stay out as long tonight.”
Reiji took the spot, handing the thermos back to Natsuki. “Well, then maybe we can just enjoy each other's company then!”
Natsuki looked down, pouring each of them a drink. “Yes.” He looked thoughtful as he handed Reiji his tea. “Hey, Rei-chan-senpai?”
“Hm? What is it Nattsun?” Reiji asked.
“There's been something I've been meaning to ask you.” Natsuki said.
“Oh, what is it? Some advice? Help with work? Ask away~!” Just please don't be what I think it is. Reiji grinned widely to mask any worry.
Natsuki looked unsure of how to start. “Well, you know I go stargazing a lot right?” Reiji nodded. “It's just...for a while, it seems like every time I come out to do that, you're already out here. And I wanted to know why?” Natsuki stared at him.
Ah shit. Shit. “What, I thought you liked stargazing with me! Don't tell me you've just been humoring an old man this whole time~.” Reiji said, avoiding the question.
Natsuki held his gaze, not rising to the teasing. “Rei-chan-senpai. I'm serious. It's not that I don't like watching stars with you. It's that...I worry about how often you're up late.” He looked down, frowning. “At first it seemed coincidental that you were out here when I was. And it probably was. But then, it seemed like every time I came out here to clear my head, you were already here. I didn't talk to you because you seemed...distant, lost in your head. And like you didn't want to be bothered. And I would let it slide but…” he looked back up at Reiji. “It's been affecting your work, hasn't it? Ai-chan-senpai has mentioned you making small mistakes more, and you seem just a little more sluggish the past few weeks. Not much, but enough to concern me. What's wrong?”
Oh, this is worse than I thought it'd be. Even Ai-Ai had been complaining more? He thought he'd been keeping it hidden well enough, but apparently not. And now Natsuki was asking him point blank and there wasn't any easy way to wiggle out of it.
Reiji looked away, down at the grass, the blanket pattern, anything to avoid looking at Natsuki's gaze. What could he say?
“Rei-chan-senpai.” Reiji looked back up at Natsuki. His expression had softened some. He looked worried. “Please, tell me what's wrong.”
Reiji sighed. Guess he had to tell the truth (or at least part of it). “Well, I've always had trouble sleeping. It just...never came easy I guess.” He fiddled with the blanket corner. “I’ve started give up on getting a full night's sleep. Even when I try to just lay there and get myself to sleep, it doesn't happen. So I just get up and do something else. Usually work.” He looked up. “That's what I was doing when I first came across you out here. And when you saw me out here, when we watched the meteor shower.”
“And the other times?” Natsuki asked.
“...It seemed like, on the nights we were out here together, even though I went back to sleep late, I slept a lot better. So I guess I came out here more trying to make that happen again.” He curled into himself. “It, uh. Hasn't been too successful. As you can tell.”
There was silence for a while, as Natsuki absorbed his words. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
Reiji chuckled wryly. “Nothing I've tried so far has, so I doubt it.” Natsuki looked down. “...Sorry. I don't want to make you feel bad. But I really don't know what would help.”
“Maybe...maybe we can just keep doing this?” Natsuki said. Reiji looked at him, confused. “You said that you slept better after we had gone stargazing right? So maybe we can just sit out here together sometimes, so you have some nights where you do sleep better?” Natsuki looked at him.
Reiji paused, then smiled. “Sure, kiddo. But only if you bring more of that tea.”
Natsuki laughed. “Of course! But it'll be the kind that makes you sleepy, not that keeps you awake.”
Reiji pouted exaggeratedly “Fine, fine~.”
The two of them fell silent after that, content to be in each other's company. They only spoke infrequently, to point out a star or a cloud. Then, when it felt right, they packed up the blanket and the thermos and walked back to the dorm.
Once he had returned to his room, Reiji settled in to bed and reflected on his night as he slowly, but surely, drifted off into a restful sleep.