Chapter Text
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Prologue
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Severus Snape was not a nice person.
He was once, as a child, even as his father tried to beat it out of him. He held onto his kindness, just as he held onto his hope. That is, until he went to Hogwarts and realized that children were just as cruel with their words and tricks as his father when he met James Potter and Sirius Black on the train to school their first year.
They instantly hated him on sight, as eleven year olds are wont to do and that kindness and hope started to slowly drain away over the years until he was eventually encompassed in bitterness.
They called themselves the Marauders, and in the beginning their pranks were mostly benign. They soon enveloped a bookish boy named Remus and a homely, mousey boy named Peter into their fold and the pranks grew bolder, branching out from just the other Gryffindors to the other houses. And as the smallest and scraggliest Slytherin, Severus quickly became a favorite target.
His only solace was that his very best friend from just two streets over was at Hogwarts, too, even if she had been sorted into Gryffindor and away from him. Lily Evans was the kindest, yet most fierce, person he had ever met, and he was absolutely in awe of her from the moment he saw her at the neighborhood playground when they were seven.
Their friendship did not prevent him from being the target of some of the Gryffindor boys’ cruelest pranks, and in fact may have only enraged the boys further. He and Lily ignored them as best as they could, but the Marauders felt it wasn’t acceptable for a Gryffindor to be talking with a Slytherin and as such took it upon themselves to make sure Severus knew that he was not wanted around any of them.
Third year, after a particularly embarrassing set of cosmetic charms that left him hiding in the infirmary until his face could be put back in its proper form, Lily took personal offense to the prank enacted on her friend and punched James right in his perfect nose, breaking his glasses clean in half. That moment would help him keep his sanity as he sat with Madam Pomfrey fussing over him and would fuel some of his first patroni when he later learned the charm.
James only tried harder to win her over.
And she only scorned him louder.
Each attempt he made was more elaborate, and more public.
And each refusal was more verbose, and in front of more people.
Potter couldn’t understand that she was absolutely devoted to her longtime friend. All he saw was a shabby, bad-tempered Slytherin defiling a Gryffindor with his mere presence.
No one quite understood the pair, quiet in their different ways, studying and laughing and walking with their heads together and rarely ever seen apart.
That is, until near the end of fifth year when he made the biggest mistake of his life and lost the only person he had ever cared about all because he lost control of his temper for a scant millisecond.
Mudblood.
One reactive word drove her from his side and straight into the lion's den unprotected.
It still took the rest of fifth and all of sixth for James to even get her to speak to him, and Severus felt the bitter sting of betrayal and hurt deeply when he saw them walking together in Hogsmeade early seventh year.
After Sirius lured him down to the shrieking shack and he was nearly mauled to death by a werewolf - oh god, Lupin was a werewolf - he determined that no one truly gave a shit about what happened to him because for their ‘prank’ they received a month of detention and loss of flying privileges the rest of the quidditch season.
He was nearly killed and those responsible simply received detention even after giving the reason for their prank.
They were bored.
To say he was upset would be a vast understatement.
His ex-best friend didn’t speak to James for a week, and Severus felt that her punishment for her boyfriend was far too lenient for nearly having someone she used to care about killed. He knew that she didn’t feel even a speck of any positive emotion for him anymore, and he knew that logically it was his fault, but all he could see was that she forgave James for nearly killing him because he was bored, but wouldn’t forgive a word spat out from a place of humiliation and shame.
And not even a week later, he saw her with the Marauders again, laughing and joking as if nothing had happened. He shoved the hurt deep where he would not feel it, and allowed his bitterness to envelop him like a blanket.
He spent the rest of the seventh year keeping his head down, studying for his NEWTs and applying with various potion’s masters for an apprenticeship. No one celebrated with him when he was extended an offer by no fewer than half of those he applied to and he forced himself to not care. He simply accepted the most prestigious one and moved on to the next item on his list of things to accomplish before he left school.
After graduation, James and Lily married and moved into the Potter manor.
After graduation, Severus went into his potions apprenticeship after accepting the mark.
James and Sirius immediately went through Auror training, and Lily went into the Unspeakable programme.
He became the youngest potions master in magical history and was placed on the Dark Lord’s inner council.
They went on counter raids and attempted to protect innocents from Death Eaters.
He was exempt from dangerous raids where Death Eaters slaughter innocents because of his gift with potions and poisons and the fact that the Dark Lord did not want to suffer through a less talented potion master in the event the group of raiders were captured or killed.
They started becoming disillusioned with Dumbledore’s vision of peace amidst the chaos.
He started becoming disillusioned with the Dark Lord’s vision of chaos amidst the peace.
They found out they were pregnant and were terrified for their unexpectedly expanding family.
He found out they were pregnant and was enraged, hating how betrayed he still felt over her.
They fought harder for their unborn child against those who would eradicate him and those like him.
He fought harder to keep himself alive amongst those who could turn on him at any moment.
And then the prophecy was overheard.
And like a foolish idiot, he passed it along and unknowingly doomed his once best friend and her family.
They were targeted by the Dark Lord and he went to Albus Dumbledore.
They went into hiding before the baby was born and he went into spying to protect himself and the little family.
And then Halloween eve, just as Samhain was beginning, he got the letter.
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31 October, 1981
Godric’s Hollow
West Country
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Regardless of his personal feelings about the man, James Potter did not deserve to lay dead in the muddy, melted patches of snow, eyes wide open with limbs sprawled awkwardly. A quick glance confirmed that the dead man had not had his wand on him, and he wondered why on earth Potter, an Auror, was without his wand. Severus twitched in discomfort before closing Potter’s eyes and staring at the open front door. Lily…
The door was swinging on its hinges, and he stepped through the frame, shuddering at the cold chill he felt as he did so. He staggered up the stairs, his heart was pounding in his ears. Dead, they’re all dead .
He saw her red hair before he saw her body and his composure broke, heavy sobs heaving his chest and he gathered her close to him and rocked her body back and forth, hardly unable to process what had happened. He mourned the loss of their friendship, he mourned the decisions he made, he mourned the fact that she was dead because of him and he knew that there could be no redemption possible for him, not for something as devastating as this.
He wasn’t sure how he had missed that the 15 month old was still alive when he first entered the room - the letter would not have brought him here otherwise, but he wasn’t thinking too clearly. He was startled by a piercing wail followed by a string of babbling that included the word up.
Ignoring the tears still streaming down his face, he gently closed Lily’s eyes and laid her back, moving towards the crib. The small child reached up, giant tears soaking the collar of his onesie, blood trickling from a mark on his forehead.
Harry.
Severus could feel his heart twist and James’ dead body loomed in his memory as his gaze flicked between Lily and Harry.
Redemption.
Even when he had received the letter, he hadn’t believed that they were actually dead and not only dead, but that he was the recipient of their trust. He pulled the letter out to glance over the words again, double checking that he had indeed read the contents correctly the first three times.
If you’re reading this, that means James and I have died. The letter has been charmed so only the best suited person to raise Harry can read it. I’m rather proud of this charm. I’ve been doing a lot of dabbling lately, especially since I’m not allowed to work since we’re in hiding. But I digress.
The letter is also a portkey that I have tied to Harry’s blood. Just say my date of birth, and it will port you to wherever he is. Provided my child is still alive, once you have him you MUST take him to Gringotts and do our will reading. Send a patronus to Griphook and he will come to take you to our vaults, no matter what time of day it is. Please, whoever this letter deemed worthy, do this last thing for us.
-Lily Anne Potter
The boy’s sobbing had faded by now and Severus realized the child had fallen asleep whilst snuggled into his neck. How on earth had he been one to receive this letter over the mutt, or the wolf, or any of the other order members?
With the hot breath exhaling against his neck leaving his skin clammy, he continued to follow the impulse that had brought him here and held Harry with one arm as he accio’d a bag from a closet. The scant amount of clothing and toys the boy owned quickly found their way neatly into the open bag. He carefully collected any personal pictures and portraits he could see and packed them away as well.
He had just shrunk down the crib and packed it into the bag when he heard something motorized in the distance that seemed out of place at this time of night. As it drew closer, he realized it was someone most likely coming to either confirm that Harry was dead, or take him away and he needed to leave immediately. He checked Harry quickly to ensure he was still asleep, held the suitcase in a tight grip, and quickly spun on his heel, apparating to Gringotts.
He quietly sent his doe to the goblin Griphook as instructed with a brief message informing him of the Potter’s deaths and Harry’s miraculous survival. As he waited in the shadows for either a return message or the goblin himself, he thought back over his memories of the man he had once deemed the best choice for Lily’s survival.
Albus Dumbledore.
The Potters had gone into hiding and were supposed to be personally protected by Dumbledore, yet they were dead. Severus suspected that if he had left Harry behind, Dumbledore would have taken him to Petunia Evan’s house and Severus would die before he allowed any child of Lily’s live with that horrid wretch of a girl he couldn't imagine had become any less bitter as an adult.
The sharp crack of apparition jerked his attention back to the here and now and his wand was halfway out of his sleeve when he noticed the goblin banker and human healer. Griphook bowed his head towards the death eater spy, while the bleary eyed old healer stood there, his back hunched in exhaustion, blinking impassively at the haggard 21 year old and toddler. They walked through the dark, empty bank, each step echoing loudly. The tiny toddler in his arms was awake again, and looking around wide-eyed and curious at all the flickers of light of the moon reflecting off of all the shiny surfaces in the bank. The child was oddly silent, as if he understood the gravity of the situation.
The reading of the will went quicker than Severus had anticipated. The Potter’s desires were clearly outlined that if they were to pass, Harry would go to whoever brought in the charmed letter out of a very short list of people, stating that whoever the charm sent the letter to had claim to Harry and that the decision was final and that if the new guardian passed before Harry came of age, he would go to another on the list.
He was more than shocked to find that he was, in fact, on the list, written in by James Potter if the handwriting was any indication. He would have to think on that later.
They also emphasised that her estranged sister was to never have any access or contact with their son, regardless of the situation and his lips pursed at the thought of the shrill, vile Petunia he had known growing up.
Also included in the will was a scroll containing apparition coordinates listed with the name of the Potter properties, including instructions on how to access each one as well as a list of vaults that were connected to the Potters. James and Lily’s personal vaults had been automatically liquidated into the main inheritance vault upon their deaths while Harry’s was left alone. The will stated that Harry’s vault was to be used to help raise Harry if necessary, and that every year on his birthday it would replenish. Once his Hogwarts letter came, the vault would increase slightly to accommodate school supplies.
Severus stared at the will until a gravelly voice spoke up from beside him. “The healer is ready, if you would please present Mr. Potter for his examination.” The goblin gestured to Severus to allow the healer to perform a quick check up on the 15 month old.
He hummed in surprise as he read the results and quirked an eye at Severus, speaking for the first time that night. “I’m going to assume you were not the caster of the spells currently affecting young Mr. Potter here.” His only response was a sardonic sneer and the healer quirked a grin. “I thought not. He has a few could be suspicious charms on his magical core.” He went to remove the charms when Severus stopped him.
“Can you trace the sources?” His tone was surprisingly calm, despite the flash of utter rage he had felt when the healer had first spoken.
The white haired healer shook his head. “Sadly, no. Had it been less than a month since application, then perhaps. However, the magical signature wears down over time. Seeing as no one has seen or heard from the Potters since they were hidden shortly after Harry was born, I would say it is extremely likely it was James, Lily, or their secret keeper who cast the charms. I suppose any other people the secret keeper had relayed the information of their location to could be responsible as well, but that would be a very unlikely scenario. James Potter was not an idiot and neither was his wife and would have not told anyone where they were.”
Severus nodded, hating that he had no real answer because he knew both of them would die before casting harmful charms on their baby. The secret keeper was such a well kept secret that not even Lily had known and while he himself had his suspicions, he had no proof nor a way to find proof. He filed the information away to pull for a pensive recording later. “Explain the charms.”
The healer grimaced and waved his wand again, naming each charm as he removed them. “First is a Magic suppressant. Alone, this isn't worrying as it is always possible that he was already displaying signs of accidental magic - and causing damage. However, if he was having early accidental magic episodes, then when I removed the charm there would have most likely been a small burst of magic, so it seems unlikely the spell cast was done for the right reasons. Next are an influencing and compelling charms, and a couple of compulsions charms, all of which are often found on a pureblood heir - however it is typically one or two of the spells, not all of them. Whoever cast these desperately wanted the boy under kept on a tight leash.”
“And you are certain you cannot ascertain the source of the spells or who the spells were meant to compel him to?”
The old healer bared his teeth and Severus knew he was very close to offending the man. “I’m very sorry, Master Snape, but it is impossible to know who the charms were intended for unless the caster themselves tells you and as I stated before, too much time has passed since their application to read a magical signature.”
Barely holding back his rage at the unknown who would cast such spells on a very young infant, he forced his tone to a more polite demure. “We need to hurry. We do not have much time. Someone will soon realize that the Potter child is missing and will most likely come here at some point and if someone other than the Potters put the charms on the boy, it will most likely be the caster.”
Or Albus Dumbledore, to take Harry to his next of kin. Who would most likely be Lily’s sister Petunia as James Potter had had no siblings, and both of his parents had passed in the months leading up to their graduation.
And Severus would fight to his dying breath to prevent any magical child being under the hateful, spiteful eye of Petunia Magic-Hater Evans.
Both of the others nodded, and the healer quickly finished writing his observations. The goblin brought forward a sharp dagger and the guardianship papers that had been folded with the will.
With some pricks of blood from both Severus and Harry, the child yelping when his finger was pricked, the guardianship of Harry James Potter transferred from his birth parents to Severus, and a Potter became a Snape. Access to the vaults and ancestral homes were stripped away from all who had been listed previously and Severus made it very clear to Griphook that only himself and Harry would have access to any of the Potter vaults.
When the magic cleared, Severus was almost blindsided by the utter Gryffindor-ness of what he had just done. Had he really just become the sole caretaker to the 15 month old spawn of both his worst tormenter and dearest friend?
He looked down at the messy mop of black curly hair and as if he could feel Severus’s eyes, Harry turned and grinned a tired smile, flashing his tiny teeth, before nessling back against his neck, popping a thumb in his mouth and sucking contentedly.
Severus thanked the goblin and healer for their prompt arrival and willingness to complete everything at this time of night. Once outside, he allowed himself a single deep breath and pressed a hand to the back of Harry’s head. “Stay still, child.” Grabbing the suitcase in hand once more, he spun on his heel.
After he had apparated back to Spinner’s End, he stood staring at his front door, the suitcase with all of the small child’s belongings sitting at his feet, and a drooling Harry snoring into his neck. “Time to find you a place to sleep.” He strode through the front door and let out a groan, finally remembering that he had no spare space at the moment as he had yet to go through any of his mother or father’s belongings or do any sort of remodeling to the horrible house.
He stared blankly at the tiny sitting room and sighed. He was too tired, too emotional, to do this tonight, his own room would have to suffice. It took quick work to re-enlarge the crib and position it where he wouldn’t trip over it in case he needed to move about in the middle of the night.
He had no sooner settled the young toddler into his crib when a knock reverberated throughout the house. Severus had a deep suspicion as to who was on the other side of the door and schooled his face to Slytherin impassivity to great his unwelcome visitor.
Indeed, Albus Dumbledore stood on the other side, though the sight of Hagrid behind him was a surprise. “I have no need to talk to you.” Severus hissed, moving to slam the door shut. He truly didn’t. Lily was dead because the old man had failed in his promise to keep them all safe.
“Ah, but you do, Severus.” The power behind the quiet tone halted the door and his shoulders slumped. Wordlessly, he led the two men into his living room. Dumbledore broke the silence again and his normally twinkling blue eyes were dark and sorrowful. “James and Lily…”
“...Are dead. I am aware.” Severus finished with a broken sneer, his heart twisting as he fought back a guilt filled sob. Lily, I’m sorry .
“Sirius Black has committed a horrible crime in betraying his friends.” The headmaster nodded gravely. “We cannot find little Harry.” His eyes were cautious, fearful, yet tinged with a bit of hope.
Severus wondered if Albus already knew he had taken Harry and questioned himself if he should be honest. He opted for partial truth. “I have him. I am taking responsibility of the child.” He was reluctant to mention the magical transfer of guardianship or Lily’s letter.
“Lily’s death has created a blood ward of familial protection.”
Severus immediately froze, his heart pounding wildly at the implications of the Headmaster’s words. He had heard of those blood wards. They required immense love to activate, but the love was required on both ends for the protection to take hold and the only family Lily had left was...He frowned deeply. “Petunia Evans had no love for Lily in life, she would not accept her sister’s son, a magical child, into her home. She is a vile, vicious woman who was jealous of Lily’s magic, and treated her scornfully because of it.”
The white hair fluttered as he nodded. “Yes, this is true.”
“Then you must also know the blood ward won’t actually hold.” Also, he was growing suspicious at the very notion that Lily would enact blood wards when she had already done the charmed letter and insisted that Petunia never have access to the boy.
Perhaps it had been a fail safe? Or, he supposed reluctantly, it could have been an accident of a sort had she stepped in front of her son purposefully with the intent to sacrifice herself so the boy would possibly survive.
Albus was silent, his blue eyes probing and serious. Severus continued, unable to keep the emotion from his voice.
“You will not take him to that wretched woman. I will not permit it.” He swallowed, the bitter feeling of betrayal deep in his gut. “You promised to keep...them safe and and now they are dead. I will not let the last tiny link I have to her be forced into a home that will despise him and treat him as I was. Guardianship has already been transferred to me. He is now magically and legally mine.”
This seemed to derail what Albus was about to say and he paused for a long minute, frowning, before his calming smile and twinkle in his eyes returned. “Well then, I was going to approach you about this later in the month, but perhaps a solution to ensure little Harry’s protection would be for you to take the potions position that will open up next year. Horace Slughorn has announced his desire to retire come next June were I to find a suitable replacement, and I can think of no better potioneer to replace him than you, Severus.”
The words were different than the Dark Lord’s, but the meaning behind them were the same. He was being offered another type of servitude.
He sneered at the very thought of dealing with the same sort of students he had just escaped from just a few years prior. “I have absolutely no desire to teach and surround myself with horrible cretins.”
He already had signed himself up for minimum 16 years of being called Daddy, and absolutely wanted nothing else to do with Hogwarts or students. Seven years of hell were enough for him, thanks.
Cerulean blue eyes probed his, intense and without their customary bright twinkle. “Severus, they will call for you to be cast into Azkaban. And what will happen to Harry then?”
His words sounded an awful lot like...his face soured at the implication. “I spied for you!” His sneer turned into a snarl. “Are you blackmailing…?”
“Of course I'm not.” Dumbledore snapped back, before taking a calming breath. “I merely want you to be aware. There will be safety at Hogwarts. I promise, you will not see the inside of Azkaban.”
He definitely did not want to go to Azkaban. However, he had his potions mastery, he could open his own apothecary or even an owl-order only business. His gaze flicked to his door, thinking about the child that lay on the other side. He had a responsibility to him now, and trying to raise a toddler in Hogwarts would not be very feasible.
But if he went to Azkaban...
“I request that if I were to accept, I would not start teaching until Harry is five and old enough to understand separation and is ready for either private tutors or primary school himself.” He asked slowly, almost certain he would be dismissed right out of hand, but the old man simply nodded his agreement with calm expression on the face and Severus went back into his thoughts.
He hated being in his potions classes with the other idiots that surrounded him. However, he did very much enjoy his last two years of potions, with their smaller classes and complex projects. And if he could teach the OWL year students as well, in an effort to help glean what information he can about their skills before their entrance into his classes, then all the better. “I will accept on three conditions.”
“If it is within my power.” The headmaster nodded at him.
“First request I already made about starting the year after Harry’s fifth birthday. Second, I will not be responsible for any patrols in the evenings, overnight, or on the weekends. I have my...I have Harry to think of, and my primary responsibility will always be him.” At least keeping the little bugger alive, at any rate. “I also have my owl order apothecary I run and I will not cast away any clients I have in favor of teaching at Hogwarts.” When his request was met with an even, listening face, he felt emboldened to continue.
“Lastly, I have never been able to suffer through idiots, nor do I have an endless amount of patience. As such, I would like to only work with the 5th year OWL students as well as the 6th and 7th years who have gotten O’s on their potions OWL. I remember being in potions class and suffering through clueless and reckless idiots who clearly had no aptitude nor the proper gravity for the art and have no desire to instruct students who do not wish to be there. I am a master of my craft, and I will not suffer an insult to it in such a manner.” The next request brought a bit more emotion in the ice blue eyes, but Albus remained silent and contemplative as he listened.
A thoughtful look crossed the old man’s face. “I shall inquire if Horace will be willing to stay a few more years full time and if not, if he has any suggestions. Perhaps an American?” His voice trailed off as he fell into thought before shaking his head quickly. “We can discuss specifics four years time but consider yourself safe, Severus. I see no issue with your requests, save for perhaps if you could take one Hogsmeade visit a month.”
Severus frowned but nodded after a moment of thought. It was fair, after all. “Only one?”
“Only one.” Albus smiled and gently rested a hand on the potion master on the shoulder. “Well, I leave Harry in your capable hands, Severus, and I bid you good eve.”
He waited until he was certain the headmaster was gone from his property before he secured the wards and trudged towards his bedroom. Tomorrow, he would start reaching out to people to see how he could get his owl-order potions business up and running beyond a handful of people he had found purely on accident. He hadn’t lied to Albus, per say, only in the timing of when the potions business had officially begun, which would be tomorrow.
And perhaps locate a crash course on how to care for a 1 year old child who was the subject of a deadly prophecy that may or may not have already been fulfilled.
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End Prologue
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