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Attraction is a celebrated thing. Something that keeps us normal, keeps up sane. Regardless if it's the cute new neighbor from across the street, or that one character on a TV show that gets the blood pumping, being attracted to someone is normal.
Right?
Wrong.
Absolutely wrong, especially in Val's case. Being attracted to someone-genuinely attracted might she add-is dangerous. Why is it dangerous one might ask? Because it leads to crushes, and crushes are something Valerian has sworn off in her heart of hearts and refuses to have.
She is the one used to getting crushed on. Val has cut off many flings with many women because they become attached to her likeable asshole exterior. Val is used to women becoming flustered around her, only for her to say something not even remotely clever and for that woman to blush even harder. She can spot the telltale signs of a crush because she's seen them time and time again, so this time around when she saw them in herself, all she could do was sigh and whisper,
"Fuck."
Val couldn't get Nyota out of her fucking head.
It was a complete accident the second time they ran into each other too. Val was going to do some last minute studying, because her kink is procrastination, and she ran into the blonde at the library. And then it happened again at the library about a week later. Next thing Val knew was Nyota strolling her pretty ass on into the bar, blonde hair in tight curls framing her heavenly face with her friends about a week after that.
Ny's friends were interesting to say the least. The tall woman tried not to scowl at the way they looked at the interior of the bar in disgust, how they all seemed manufactured in the same rich kid factory, or how they all had the latest iPhone complete with name brand handbags and sunglasses (Even though it was midnight). But whenever Val would catch one of their comments about the condition of the bar or on her own appearance, or how one of them jokingly gagged after seeing Val's work boots, the brunette would just take a look at Nyota, and all of her anger and extremely mean comments about their daddy issues would fade away.
Because every time Val is graced with the sight of the goddess that is Nyota, 3 things happen; 1. Her asscheeks clench 2. She sucks in a deep breath and whispers multiple curses to herself and 3. She throws on a smile that Ny always returns and her ice cold heart melts the tiniest bit.
But that time at the bar, about 3 weeks after they initially met at 2 in the morning, the pair agreed on a study session at Ny's place. It seemed like a fine idea at the time, at least that's what Valerian thought. Though fast forwarding to her in her apartment vehemently ignoring her roommate trying to have a direct conversation with her in search of something that didn't smell like whiskey or scotch made her think the decision was completely idiotic. Though looking back on the encounter, Val was completely caught in Ny's spell.
~~~
Valerian had been wiping down the counter after finishing making 3 Mai Thai's for a group of older women that had made their way into the bar. Val had flirted her way to a generous tip with one of them, even in front of Ny who was once again perched on the barstool sipping graciously at the vodka cranberry Val had made the second she stepped into the bar.
"I didn't know you had game like that Val." Val heard the comment from Ny, but waited to reply.
It was true the campus was large, but anyone at least that lived around her apartment complex knew of her rather… popular social life. Val shrugged her shoulders slightly and threw the towel over it, resting her eyes on Ny's and shrugging. She saw the blonde roll her eyes and shake her head.
"Don't be fucking coy now just because I know you fuck on a regular basis." Ny's blunt comment brought a wide grin from Val, and an even heartier laugh.
The brunette tipped her head back and allowed the laughs to escape her throat, Val having to hold her stomach for a moment trying to calm herself. Taking a deep breath and running a hand through her hair she nodded.
"Sounds about right. Nothing I love more than a good drink and a pair of legs to spread." The words escaped her lips, Val a little hesitant to say them because of how honest they were.
She relaxed though when she saw Ny now tip her own head back and laugh just the same as she did only a few moments earlier. Val's eyes narrowing on the column of her neck, the pale skin looking so soft… so touchable. The brunette cleared her throat at her own lewd thoughts and saw a few more people approaching the bar. She turned her attention toward them and allowed Ny to her own devices.
Around 10 minutes later, with no more water and miscellaneous alcoholic beverages on the bar to wipe up, Val was no longer busy. She turned her attention to Ny once more and saw the woman's drink needed a refill. She reached her hand out and took the glass, throwing the old one into the sink and grabbing a fresh cup. Val grabbed the appropriate ingredients and started on the blonde's drink.
"Come over." The words echoed from Ny's lips.
Val damn near dropped the bottle of vodka she had in her hands at the suggestion. She heard Nyota laughing and sighed, though she didn't know if she was mad or relieved the comment seemed like a joke.
"No- I mean not now. But next weekend, we could study and then have a meal or something." The blonde made it seem as if it was the most platonic encounter in the world.
And if Ny had no issues with having Val over, than Val should have no issues coming over, so like a dumbass, and staring into Ny's eyes that were fucking hypnotic, she said,
"Yeah, that sounds dope, and then maybe I could actually study for once." She smiled at Ny, who returned it then happily drank the fresh vodka cranberry that Val slid over toward her. The pair then exchanged numbers and made the date official.
But oh boy was Val in over her fucking head that week later.
~~~
"Does this smell like whiskey?!" Val yelled at her roommate who stood in the living room in an XL t-shirt and panties.
She tossed the long sleeve shirt to the woman who caught it then winced. Val frowned then crossed her arms, tapping her foot in thought. She contemplated on going into her dirty clothes then dousing a shirt in cologne and calling it a day, but ultimately decided against the idea.
"You wanna borrow one of my shirts? They don't smell like personified alcoholism." Her roommate, Faith, had pointed into her room.
Val shook her head, flipped Faith off, and tapped her chin. She hadn't meant for her clothes to smell like booze, but she fell asleep fully clothed after getting shitfaced one too many times to count. And the smell permeated indefinitely. The brunette walked toward her room once again and slid open her closet door.
T-shirt, T-shirt, T-shirt, collared shirt, flannel, flannel, flannel, flannel, T-shirt. There wasn't much variety in Val's wardrobe. Each garment she brought to her nose for a sniff and then swore she probably just radiated the scent of alcohol because every single shirt reeked of Jack Daniels.
Val placed her hands on her hips and sighed, rolling her eyes and grabbing her black "Proud Vagitarian" shirt with her red-and-black flannel. She headed to her bathroom and began brushing her teeth, then decided on a few extra spurts of her cologne than usual, and pulled the ensemble together. Val threw on her best pair of boots and her most presentable belt, then decided the slightly disheveled nature of her hair was intentional and not because she had taken a 4 hour nap after her classes.
Val had walked around her unmade bed and grabbed the backpack from the ground complete with her laptop onto her back. Because believe it not, regardless of how badly the raging homosexual inside of her was going to protest, she was going to attempt to study at Ny's place. The brunette checked the fridge and grabbed the bag of tofu Ny had instructed her to get earlier in the week and said goodbye to Faith, who was sitting on the couch watching The Bachelor.
Val hadn't bothered to lock the door, but she exited her apartment complex and walked in the direction of her job, knowing Ny's place was just a few minutes away from it. While walking she had texted the blonde, letting her now she was en route, and dropped her phone back into the pocket of her jeans.
Her heartbeat naturally crescendoed at the familiar landmarks she spotted while nearing Ny's apartment.
Val's stride remained strong but her breathing wavered, even though she maintained a walking pace. Val gripped the bag of tofu in her hand a little bit tighter while she entered Ny's complex, and received a text from the blonde, letting her know the floor and apartment number she was on.
"Oh fuck me." Val murmured while pressing the appropriate floor number to the elevator then stepping inside.
Her nerves were so bad Val barely had the time to recognize the gaudy lobby of the complex. Her eyes barely grazing over the gold color scheme before the elevator doors shut and she was left with her own distorted appearance. Val breathed in deep a few times, the action calming her somewhat, but her heart rate only picked up again when the elevator doors opened and she stepped out and onto the floor.
Val reached a hand into her pocket and peaked at her phone, checking the apartment number then dropping her cellular back into her pocket. Val walked until she stood in front of the door and sighed.
"Alright, dumbass, try not to act like you could diarrhea yourself at any moment… Even though you totally could." Val whispered the pep talk to herself.
She then looked left and right down the hall to see if anyone heard her, and celebrated mentally at the hallways' vacancy. She shook her head, shaking the thoughts away then raised her hand and knocked firmly three times.
Val's heart once again jumped, at the approaching steps she heard toward the door. Coming near, near, near, until…
Holy fucking shit.
Val's smile immediately went to her lips while her anxiety was having a code red at Ny's appearance.
"Hey stranger," Val's ears barely picking up Nyota's voice because her eyes were glued to the decorated tights on the woman's legs. Then the corduroy dress, and frilly white button up underneath.
"Hey…" Though Val's own voice was distant, she was still too busy having grand gay time with Ny's appearance.
But the brunette finally snapped out of it and looked at the blonde's blue eyes. She watched the woman step to the side and welcome her into her apartment, which Val thanked her for and immediately could see why Nyota was studying to become an interior designer.
Every single piece of the woman's apartment, from the millennial pink walls, to the miscellaneous posters of art that Val assumed were originals, or even the record player and collections of vinyls that not only hung on the woman's walls but scattered in giant millennial pink colored bins let Val know all about Nyota. Which speaking of the woman was grinning at her reaction to her apartment.
"I know, I know. I'm a bit of a whore for decorating, but I can't really help it," It was probably the first time Val had seen Ny look sheepish about something.
"Don't downplay it. I think your whole theme is fucking sick," Val let the genuine words spill from her lips and she saw Nyota peer at her.
It reminded her of the way she looked at her the first time they met. As if she was actually gazing at her, and not at the masks Valerian uses to hide herself. But that Nyota stripped her bare and was peering into her soul, and it scared the fucking shit out of Val.
So she coughed and held up the bag of tofu, breaking the tension. Then began laughing when Ny broke her gaze as well and clapped her hands. She handed the bag to the blonde who walked to the kitchen and Val stood a little awkwardly in the living room, her eyes still going over all the minuscule details of the decor. Valerian had noticed Ny's bare feet so she leaned over and pulled off her boots, setting them near the door then watched as Nyota waved at her down the hall.
Val pulled at the straps to her backpack and followed, still looking at the decorations in the hallway, all seemingly placed with some intention that was unknown to her, but made complete sense to Nyota. Once they reached her room, which looked like Pinterest's headquarters, Val sat down on the bed.
The brunette pulled out her laptop and scooted back a portion onto the mattress, always hyper aware of how close Nyota was to her as she watched the woman reach for her own laptop and pull it open. Val sat crossed legged on the bed and peered as Ny flipped onto her stomach and began reading something on her laptop.
They were quiet.
Extremely quiet.
Val was almost afraid to breathe at how silent the two were being, she then saw Ny reach for her phone and some soft music began playing through the wireless speakers on the nightstand to the right side of the bed. The brunette chuckled as Hayley Kiyoko's vocals began sounding through the speakers, the brunette recognizing the song immediately.
Val had gotten into a groove with her studying. The woman finishing up her notes in her Psychology class and moving onto some review for Anatomy. Val was so focused she hadn't noticed Ny had switched positions and was now sitting crossed legged on the bed and facing her, staring.
Val had peered up for a moment, not recognizing that Ny was staring, but the image replayed itself in her head and she looked back up, making eye contact with the woman.
"How many?" The words came from Nyota's lips, and their meaning was foreign to Val.
The brunette was sure her facial expression showed that point because she watched as Ny placed her arms to the sides and rested her weight on them. Val gazed intently as she took one of her hands and ran it through her blonde hair, the brunette almost cursing to herself at how unintentionally sexy it was.
"How many women have you been with?" Nyota finally elaborated and Val swallowed hard.
The question rang out through her head. The brunette furrowed her eyebrows, trying to formulate a respectable answer.
"My freshman year was 8 women," Val recalled and set her laptop to the side, mirroring Ny's position while she continued to recollect.
"My sophomore was more than 15… Though I don't have a specified number," Val tapped her chin as she spoke, ignoring the wide eyed glance she got from Nyota at her answer.
"The summer coming into my junior year, was anywhere over 20 women… Again, I lost count,"
Val admitted then rested her hands in her lap.
She laughed when Ny's mouth slowly opened. The brunette ran a hand through her own hair and peered over at her laptop, closing it, then returning her attention to Ny, who still looked curious.
"Why was summer the time you got the most ass?" Once more, an extremely blunt question coming from Ny.
Val pursued her lips in pursuit of an answer.
"I went to a lot of parties with my friends. And I started going home with more than one woman, and then that started happening frequently, and then my body count skyrocketed," Val laughed softly at the fact.
She was gauging Ny's reaction, though the blonde seemed pretty neutral to that comment.
"Ever been with a man?" Val glared playfully at Nyota the second the comment left her lips then rolled her eyes as the blonde began laughing.
Val joined in on the laughter too and then rested her hands in her lap once more, her eyes darted to the Florence + The Machine poster directly behind Ny.
Val saw Nyota shake her head and shrug.
"You're not missing much. I mean, yeah- penetration is nice, but I've never climaxed with a man before," And at Ny's comment Val felt the smallest sense of pride swell in her chest.
If there was one thing Valerian was good at it, it was making women cum.
Valerian watched Ny look at her face after the comment, and then a grin spread to her lips, one that the brunette wasn't exactly comforted by.
"I mean-" Ny brushed her hair off her shoulders for a moment.
"I've gotten pretty damn good at faking them at least," Ny shrugged nonchalantly then left the conversation at that.
Val had stared at the woman who sat in silence, then assumed she had nothing left to say and reached for her laptop. Val pulled it open then continued to look at her review for her Anatomy class and then she began to hear… noises.
The brunette had thought they were just apart of a song, because they were so quiet, and she had even leaned over slightly to the right on the bed to listen to the speaker closer, but determined they weren't coming from there then leaned back.
And if they weren't coming from the speaker…
There was only one other option.
Holy fucking shit.
Val thought to herself once when she saw Ny's face. It was an expression she had never seen before, lust.
Val returned her gaze back to her laptop and attempted to continue reading her notes on the muscular system when she heard it.
"Fuck…"
A single curse could have never sent a chill down Valerian's spine like that one just did. The brunette fought hard to not look, casting quick gazes to Ny who was putting on an Oscar worthy performance, but her resolve faltered and she began staring, hard.
The blonde had her teeth buried in the fullness that was her bottom lip, her breath coming out in deep waves, as her hips began to rock ever so slightly. Val clenched her jaw at the slight whine that escaped her mouth, the timing directly in tune with her hips as they jerked up.
The noise didn't falter either.
Oh no. It became much more frequent, as did Ny's rocking, which the rhythm began to even affect Val's stability on the bed as she sat only about a foot and a half in front of Ny.
"Shit… Just like that," Val's eyes clenched shut at the whine she found once again in Ny's voice.
The blonde's head had tilted back now, her hips moving even more freely even as one of the blonde's hands had reached and grasped at her own breast. Val's eyes widened and her gaze darted to her laptop, trying to ignore Ny, but she knew her attempts were futile.
"Fuck me so good," A gasp.
"Fuck me so deep," Another gasp, then a pinch of her own nipple.
"Fuck me harder," The begging. The whine in her voice, the subtle catch of her breath as she reached sucked one of fingers into her mouth.
Val watched the digit disappear, and her cheeks hollowed and she brought her pointer finger out with a pop then picked up the pace with her hips. Then suddenly Ny's head fell forward, and whines that seemed so sharp in their increase in volume, Val almost thought the woman was in pain.
Though she was once again mistaken.
And Val's eyebrows reached the ceiling at the remarks that would leave Ny's lips.
"Please fuck me harder, I need it so fucking bad," Nyota had now resorted to panting. Her whines and moans once again in time with the rocking motion of her hips. And then she brought her head up once more.
Her eyes opened. Her gaze right on Val as she stared at her, panting, then she licked her lips and winked.
Val once again quivered in her spot, watching Ny throw tilt her head back forward.
"God, I think I'm gonna fucking cum," She bit her lip once more and then like a clap of thunder a gasp escaped her lips.
And the sounds Nyota made. How genuine they seemed even though she knew they were fake, sent shivers down Val's spine, made her thighs clench, and eyes widened.
Then there was laughing. Ny was sitting with her hands in her lap actually laughing and sighing.
"But yeah, that's usually what I do if I just want my hookup with a guy to be over with," She shrugged slightly and played with her fingers in her lap, her demeanor nonchalant.
Val was still processing what had happened. Trying to determine that Nyota indeed had just faked an orgasm right in front of her and then brushed the encounter off as if it didn't happen. The brunette watched, her mouth still slightly agape as Ny rose from the bed then announced that she was going to start on diner. The throb between her legs the only indication of the encounter that had just happened.
Valerian studied some more and the two ate dinner while having a completely normal conversation.
Val left her apartment smiling and calm, even as she walked back to her own. But the image of Ny with her head thrown back, moans escaping, fists clenching in pleasure, was something she wanted to see genuinely. And Val fell asleep with that thought in her head, the blonde's moans and curses echoing in her ears.
It was the best sleep she had in months.