Chapter Text
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Naruto is on a much-needed break from working in the Hokage tower. If he stayed in that office any longer he’s sure he would have ripped Kakashi’s arm off, which really wasn’t fair considering the guy didn’t actually do anything. Rationale aside, the omega is in a foul mood. It doesn't help that all he can think about is Kakashi and his voice and the way he smells.
A walk is what he needs to clear his head. It's that or destroy another training field in a fit of helpless, conflicted, rage.
Naruto has his arms crossed behind his head as he strolls through town. He’s not making eye contact with anyone that he passes and he probably stinks. It’s a day after his last heat and it's likely everyone can smell the heavy, lingering scent of Kakashi and Naruto’s latest romp even through the blockers. At least no one is dumb enough to say anything about it.
“Hey, Naruto!” A familiar voice rises above the noise from the crowd. When the omega turns around he spots Shikamaru trying to catch up. “You got a minute?” The beta asks once he’s closer.
Naruto shrugs. He owes Shikamaru for the past few days, anyway. The beta always picks up extra hours when Naruto and Kakashi were out and the guy never asks questions. “What’s up?”
Shikamaru looks tired but that’s not unusual. “I’d rather talk in private. Wanna get some lunch?” He leads them to a BBQ place and takes a seat in the back.
After they order their food Naruto snaps. “You gonna spit it out or what?”
The Nara sighs and looks off to the side. He’s slouched against the booth with his arms propped up on the back of the seat. “This is such a drag. Don’t bite my head off, alright? Sakura asked me to check on you.”
“Sakura?” The blond sounds surprised and confused. He sees the pink haired beta often. She works at the hospital and rarely goes on missions anymore. The girl never had a problem butting into his business before, what would stop her now?
“Yeah,” Shikamaru winces. “I was worried too, actually.”
“What’s going on?” Naruto growls. He’s got a sinking feeling in his stomach and suddenly he’s lost his appetite.
“We just…look man, we know about your arrangement with the Hokage. I might be a beta but even I can smell it on you.”
Naruto tries to get up to leave, having already heard enough, but Shikamaru was ready for that and grabs Naruto with his shadows. “Let me go,” the blond warns darkly and pulls on the binds.
“Just hear me out,” the Nara pleads with a strained voice. He’s struggling to keep his hold and in a war of attrition they both know the beta doesn’t have a snowballs chance in hell of out lasting Naruto.
The blonds eyebrow twitches and he really considers throwing a royal fit but…Shikamaru is one of his best friends, so he sucks it up. “Fine," the blond relents and is released from the jutsu. "You’ve got till I finish my lunch,” he immediately tucks into his plate.
Knowing just how fast Naruto can put away some food, Shikamaru decides to bite the bullet. “Is he mistreating you?”
Naruto chokes on his lunch and his face goes deep red. He coughs and pounds his chest, trying to clear his throat. How the hell does he explain that it’s the opposite that’s true? Actually, our Hokage fucks like a pro and he gets me off like nobody’s business?
“After…each time,” the beta explains carefully. “You’re really irritable and…you seem kind of angry at him?”
The blonds face goes from red to white and he thinks he might actually die here, with a rib lodged in his throat.
“If he’s not treating you right you don’t have to put up with it. Sakura and I could talk to him…get you reassigned or something,” he explains with stern but protective eyes.
Naruto wants to stick his head in the dirt. While it’s very touching to think his friends are willing to confront Friend-Killer-Kakashi and current Hokage for the sake of his honor, Naruto does not want them to have that conversation. “No!” He shouts, finally finding his voice. “He’s…no, you got it all wrong he’s…” gentle, kind, respectful, a beast in bed…“fine.”
Shikamaru quirks an eyebrow, clearly not convinced. “Fine?”
The omega glowers. “Do I need to spell it out? What do you think we’re doing? It’s fine!” He shrieks, now mortified.
The Nara leans back a bit, now both brows are in his hairline. He can read between the lines, apparently, and it seems he understands. “Ok,” he concedes slowly after a pause. “Then…if it’s not…uh,” he clearly struggles to word the bomb sex you’re having. “Why are you angry at the Hokage?”
Naruto looks down at his plate. He should wolf it down and leave Shikamaru with the bill for springing this shit on him. Instead, he sighs and looks up at his friend. They’ve gotten close over the years, as they both work mostly in the Hokage Tower these days. Shikamaru is also a beta and he's courting Temari, so he’s one of the few people Naruto knows wasn’t on that volunteer list. If he was going to talk to anyone about this, it would be Shikamaru. Plus, the guy did ask. “I’m not angry at him. He’s done everything possible to make it easier on me.”
The beta takes a drink; maybe he realizes the issue is more complicated than he originally thought. “Then what’s the problem?” He asks bluntly but not unkindly. “You were stomping around like the Hokage burned down Ichiraku’s.”
“Because I didn’t expect to like it,” the omega blurts, finally. “I shouldn’t like it. It shouldn’t be so good. I don’t want to like it.” His face is hot with shame. Even now, outside of his heat, Naruto finds himself thinking about Kakashi. He wants Kakashi to kiss him, to hold him, to be near him. He wants his things to smell like the alpha, and he wants him for more than just a heat-reliever. He wants the alpha on top of him, inside him; he can’t stop thinking about it.
“You feel guilty because...the sex is good?” Shikamaru asks carefully.
The blond leans back and forfeits his meal. “I thought it would be horrible. Before I knew who was going to be assigned to me, I thought the worst. I was prepared to hate everything about it... including the person and what they were going to do to me," he admits, and the mood drops. "A part of me wishes Kakashi wasn’t so…”
“Naruto,” the beta interrupts firmly. There’s a concerned expression on his face when he continues. “You’re talking about wanting to be punished.”
The omega jolts at the accusation, because he knows it’s true even if he hadn’t thought about it like that before. He feels like he should be punished for sleeping with someone who isn’t Sasuke, and now that he’s enjoying it Naruto doesn’t know how to deal. He feels confused and angry. “Yeah,” he admits slowly like it’s still sinking in. “I guess so…I’m pretty fucked up,” he laughs sadly.
Shikamaru frowns. “You aren’t fucked-up. It's a fucked-up situation.”
"No kidding," the blond snorts.
"Look, it's none of my business but," the beta hesitates. "You're not doing anything wrong and you don't need to punish yourself."
Naruto feels like screaming. How can he just let it go? Isn't he dishonoring Sasuke by desiring another alpha? Isn't he betraying his own commitment to Sasuke, his soulmate, by wanting Kakashi again? "I can't help it," he snarls. "I keep thinking what if…Sasuke asked if I liked it. What would I tell him?"
What would Sasuke think if he knew Naruto liked taking Kakashi’s knot? How would Sasuke react if he knew Naruto had started dreaming about Kakashi, that Naruto wanted Kakashi to touch him? Would he be angry? Feel betrayed? Kill their former sensei in a fit of alpha rage? As far as the omega is concerned, it will be nothing good and it's his fault.
"Sasuke isn't here," the beta snaps with uncharacteristic fury.
Naruto's attention is jerked away from his pity party. Before he can even think of a response, Shikamaru is rounding on him again.
"You need this, as awkward and unorthodox as it is. It's better that you're with Kakashi than someone who would treat you like trash. If Sasuke can't get over his alpha bullshit to see that, he can fuck off.”
Naruto blinks. "...is that how you were going to talk to Kakashi when you thought he was being a prick?" The blond asks, somewhat dumbfounded by the typically mild beta's sudden bark.
Shikamaru groans, "basically. Man, this is such a drag. You had me and Sakura worried...but this is just as messed up. You need to talk to him.”
"Yeah," the omega huffs. "That's exactly what I want to do."
“I'm serious," the beta snipes. "If we thought you were angry, he probably thinks you hate him, which would make him feel guilty. Meanwhile, you feel guilty because you secretly don’t hate him. It’s a total clusterfuck and you need to talk to him.” The Nara is tired just thinking about it.
"That's great advice," Naruto says sourly. He has been playing as close to the chest as possible since he and Kakashi started their arrangement. It helped keep his emotions out of what they had to do, or that's what Naruto was telling himself.
The beta rolls his eyes. "Talk to him. It's stressing all of us out. You guys either smell like sex or like a fight is about to break out, sometimes both. It makes the whole tower tense."
Naruto hangs his head. "Yeah, alright," he concedes reluctantly. Even the number one hyperactive knuckle head ninja understands it's not a good idea to make a room full of jounin anxious on a regular basis. He can't let this impact his work as a shinobi or the safety of the village. "I'll talk to him.”
"Good." Shikamaru sighs, looking like he just survived a battle. "You've got the rest of the day off, anyway. Hokage-sama sent me out to tell you to take a personal day.”
The omega winces. "Was I that bad?"
"Oh yeah," he laughs and looks at the omega with playful bafflement. "Are you sure he's as good as you say, because you definitely don't act like someone who's getting a good fu—ow!"
Naruto throws a rib square between Shikamaru's eyes. "Shut up, you perv!"
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