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The Wind Master is lovely in many ways and He Xuan desperately wishes to be blind to his radiance.
When He Xuan first meets her, she ambushes him in the streets in front of his palace, all bright laughter and easy smiles. Few gods cared to meet the new Earth Master and he's baffled by her enthusiasm. She reminds him of someone long dead and he forcefully stomps down the memory, even as something flutters in his empty chest. There is no room in his world for anyone else, so he sneers at her, sending her away with cold eyes and colder words. He should have known someone like her would only take it as a challenge.
The gravity of the situation dawns on him when a young man calls out to him in the crowd of gods collected in the Martial Hall. His smile is familiar but He Xuan doesn't make the connection until later. At the smiling god's side, is another man and He Xuan would recognize that face anywhere. Cold fury rises in his veins and he turns away before he's forced to bear the presence of his murderer.
Days later, he’s faced once again with the smiling woman knocking, when she’s knocking on his door, refusing to be sent away until he opens it. She has a bottle of wine hidden in her sleeve, inviting herself inside brazenly. That night, He Xuan learns her name and her identity when she fans her flushed face with a fan proudly proclaiming her title. Right then, he almost throws her out, cutting her off before she can get any ideas about them being friends. In the end, he doesn’t. Asleep against his side, her face is open and so very trusting that it makes him ache with something he thought to have lost long ago.
After that, he makes a point to avoid the Wind Master, at least during those times he’s masquerading as the Earth Master. Still, Shi Qingxuan is terribly skilled at finding him and He Xuan gets the sinking feeling that the Wind Master is more cunning than anyone gives him credit for. When the god calls out to him even in a small city in the mortal realm, He Xuan begins to suspect he’s already lost the fight. Before he can even think of fleeing, the Wind Master is at his side, clinging to his arm with surprising strength. “Don’t run away,” he says, teasing smile playing on his lips. “I’ll get the impression you don’t like me.” Even when He Xuan admits to the truth, telling Shi Qingxuan that he doesn’t like him, it doesn’t deter the god the slightest. He Xuan finds himself giving in. A scene would only draw more attention to himself, after all.
He Xuan ought to know better. Weeks turn into years and years into centuries, and yet, the Wind Master is still by his side. At some point, he ran out of excuses and now he has to face the truth. He’s been lying to himself, finding ways to let Shi Qingxuan and her bright laughter into his life. It might have displeased the god, but if He Xuan truly wanted her gone he could have gotten rid of her long ago. She’s useful to him, of course, but the information he needs is easily attainable for him anyway. She’s guilty of her brother’s crimes, but He Xuan quickly learns that she had no idea of what has been done to him in her name. She’s enchanting, her laughter captivating and He Xuan is unable to pull away. He’s not sure what to make of it.
He tries to keep her at arm’s length, he really does. Once, he swore never to be with anyone else. Some days the guilt might suffocate him if he weren’t already dead. Despite his harsh words, despite his cold façade, he can’t help but be gentle when she’s lying in his arms at night. She’s so small in this form, and He Xuan has the urge to hide her away, keep her out of harm’s way. Once again, he knows he’s powerless to protect the one the closest to him. After all, she was the one inviting her own demise in.
Even in the crowd, He Xuan’s eyes always find the Wind Master. He’s enchanting, the center of attention. There’s a gaggle of gods around him, trying to earn the god’s friendship. His popularity is no surprise. Shi Qingxuan has the riches of his brother with none of his unpleasant personality. It’s still confusing to He Xuan why the Wind Master was so starved for his friendship, but now that he has him, he can’t help but glare at a particularly pushy martial god. He wants to drag the Wind Master away from this ridiculous banquet and the notion itself is quite alarming. For the first time in centuries, He Xuan is acutely aware of how lost he truly is.
But his fate had never in his own hands, and the meeting with Hua Cheng sets off the culmination of the plans he nurtured for far too long. That night, He Xuan holds the Wind Master tight in her arms, not bothering to shed the disguise of the day. If Shi Qingxuan notices how she trembles, she keeps quiet, clinging to her throughout the night.
It’s a surprise to He Xuan when Shi Qingxuan is the one bursting through the door of his cell. He looks ridiculous in that torn gown and He Xuan tells him as much. The Wind Master is no fighter. He shouldn’t be here in the first place. It’s beyond reckless and He Xuan knows beyond a doubt that Shi Qingxuan cares far too much for him. It’s enough to let him imagine a life where the Wind Master picks his best friend over his brother. Closing his eyes, He Xuan blocks out the world. Hope is a dangerous thing for someone like him.
When afraid, Shi Qingxuan sticks closely to his side, digging his fingers into He Xuan’s arm, hard enough for him to feel the pain. The irony isn’t lost on He Xuan, and he can see the silent judgment in Hua Cheng’s eyes. Scaring the Wind Master is not something He Xuan enjoys, but it is necessary that Shi Qingxuan learns of the truth, that he understands He Xuan’s suffering to its full extent. But even knowing his brother’s sins, Shi Qingxuan decides to stick to his brother’s side until the very end. The reality of it tastes awfully bitter.
After centuries of preparation, his revenge is far from the sweet triumph he always imagined. Blood is clinging to his hands, the stench of iron mixing with the awful smell from his prison cell. Still, even covered with dirt and blood, Shi Qingxuan in the only beautiful thing in this desolate place.
The Wind Master is lovely, even broken as he is, and He Xuan wishes he never saw any of it.