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“You looked good out there today,” Grace says against her neck, and Dani hums happily in response. If Grace doesn’t stop soon, she’s going to leave a mark, but Dani’s not so sure she minds. (Distantly, she thinks of all the scars Grace has because of her, and feels like it’s only fair.)
“You think?” she asks teasingly. They did target practice today, and Dani’s proud of how far she’s come, but perhaps not as proud as Grace and Sarah both seem to feel. She can’t decide which reaction she liked better, Sarah’s approving smile or Grace’s coy smirk, but the latter was how she knew all day that they’d wind up here later, so it might be winning out for now.
Grace pulls back to shoot her the same sort of look now, maybe a little less coy with her hands up Dani’s shirt. “You have great form,” she says, eyes sparkling with arousal and the thrill of getting to speak it aloud. Dani loves her like this, flirty and playful. She hardly got to see Grace crack a smile when she first met her, between all the running for their lives and figuring out what to do next. By the time she realized just how badly she wanted to see more of that smile, things were so dire it was nearly lost to her forever. But Grace made it; they made it.
“I have great teachers,” Dani replies, sitting back at Grace’s silent insistence and lifting her arms for Grace to pull off her shirt. Grace makes just the hungry little sound Dani was hoping for; she knows how much Grace likes this strappy black sports bra, and Dani’s become quite the expert strategist.
“I’m your favourite, though,” Grace breathes, her husky voice doing things to Dani.
She weighs her options as Grace kisses her way down her chest. She likes it when Grace gets a little bratty, wonders if she’ll pout and whine at her if she says what she’s thinking, or if she’ll just get possessive—Dani might enjoy that, too. But there’s the chance Grace would just be hurt, or think she’s not enough for Dani, and that’s the last thing Dani wants. It’s a delicate topic, she decides, one she’s better off bringing up sometime when both their clothes are on and she isn’t so desperate for Grace to keep touching her.
Eventually, though, Grace notices how long she’s taking to respond, pulls back to regard her. “Right?” she asks, still playful, to Dani’s relief.
“Of course you are,” says Dani, taking the opportunity to divest Grace of her own shirt, delighted to find she decided to forego a bra today.
“Good,” says Grace, shuddering with pleasure as Dani runs her hands up her sides. “‘Cause right now, I want you all to my—”
If there’s an award for ironic timing, it should go to Sarah, who chooses this of all moments to barge into their room, even though she’s normally pretty good at giving them their space to be alone. “Grace, if you took my last pack of smokes…”
She trails off, seemingly freezing in the doorway as she takes in the scene in front of her. Dani almost laughs, because it’s not often that Sarah freezes, but her mirth wars with the embarrassment and arousal she’s feeling at being caught, and it all has the effect of keeping her quiet, unwilling to be the first one to react.
It’s Grace who finally breaks the suspiciously long silence. “Get out,” she barks over her shoulder at Sarah, her voice too loud for the small bedroom. From the door, Dani knows Sarah can’t see much but Grace’s toned back, Dani in her bra—nothing that should scandalize her too much. Sarah still seems thrown off balance, and that ignites a mischievous hope in Dani.
“Lock your door, next time,” Sarah mutters as she goes.
Grace huffs indignantly as she turns back to Dani.”Sorry,” she says shakily. “Where were we?” Before Dani can even think, Grace is pushing her onto her back, covering Dani’s entire body with hers as she kisses her bruisingly.
Dani’s only too happy to reciprocate, but she can’t help but notice the spike in Grace’s body heat, how different that is from the slow crescendo it normally builds to as Dani brings her close to the edge. Then Grace is biting at her lower lip, and even as Dani moans softly, she finds it curious how quickly this has progressed.
There are things that Dani wants, things she’s thought about for a while now, but Grace and Sarah would both have to be on board for anything to happen—Grace, because Dani isn’t willing to jeopardize what they have for anything; Sarah, of course, because Dani doesn’t know yet if that’s something she might want, too. But what Dani knows is that she wants Sarah, in a way not so different from how she wants Grace. And sometimes, she wonders if Grace might want the same thing. She’s caught her a few times, watching Sarah clean her guns or stretch out on a motel bed when they’ve all had to share a room, and seen a hint of that dangerous sparkle in her eyes that’s usually reserved for Dani. But that’s all she’s had to go on, until now.
“Grace?” she murmurs questioningly, her hands trailing down to the waistband of Grace’s underwear. Grace nods her consent, so Dani slips a hand inside, brushing down through Grace’s curls the way she knows she likes, then lower, where she’s able to confirm her suspicions.
“You’re a liar,” says Dani, and Grace’s expression of desire morphs into one of confusion. “You don’t mind sharing me so much, do you?” Dani clarifies, circling Grace’s entrance, feeling the wetness there. “You liked her seeing us like this.”
Grace tries to scoff, but the effect is ruined by how turned on she clearly is. “No,” she says weakly, her breathing already becoming erratic as Dani slowly explores. It isn’t much of an argument.
“Not a very good liar, though,” says Dani, smirking beneath her as her fingers travel higher, but still not where Grace needs them. She loves how quickly they’re able to turn the tables on each other. Grace will get her back for this later, no doubt, but for now she lets herself enjoy Grace’s hot breath on her skin and the sounds she’s trying to catch in the back of her throat. “You liked her looking at your body.” With her free hand, she cups one of Grace’s breasts. “You liked her seeing my hands on you.”
“Dani…” Grace trails off, distracted by the feel of those fingers finally brushing against her clit, only to dart away once more.
“Am I wrong?” asks Dani, suddenly serious. She won’t draw this out if Grace really doesn’t want her to.
Grace’s gaze turns serious, too, because it never takes them long to get on the same page. She sees what Dani’s asking her now, and the way she bites her lip tells Dani a lot, but she still needs to hear Grace say the words.
“Fine,” says Grace at last, so quietly Dani might’ve missed it if she weren’t inches away from her face, her every sense totally attuned to Grace’s sounds and movements.
“Fine?” asks Dani, feeling herself glow with the satisfaction of being right, the excitement of this newly shared secret.
Grace sighs, so obviously trying not to smile. “Maybe I liked it a little .”
“So stubborn,” Dani laughs, but she begins applying just the sort of pressure she knows Grace goes wild for, and Grace rolls her hips against Dani’s hand in a way that makes it hard for Dani to maintain her smug composure.
She sets a slow, deliberate pace, giving Grace time to feel everything, letting her signal to Dani when she needs more or something different. They’re quiet but for both their quickening breathing until Dani slides a couple of fingers inside Grace, and the way Grace moans at that emboldens her.
“Do you think she’d like watching this?” Dani asks, feeling as though the words are coming from someone else, because they don’t normally talk like this during sex. It feels new, but she likes it. Grace must agree, based on the noise she makes as she exhales. “Of course,” Dani answers herself. “She’d be crazy not to. Who wouldn’t want to see you like this?”
“Dani,” Grace pants out, as Dani’s fingers curl inside her, hitting that spot that she knows will be Grace’s undoing.
“Do you want her to do this to you, too?” Dani whispers, calculating just the right moment to curl her fingers again, warmth surging through her body as Grace tightens around her.
“God, yes!” Grace cries out as she comes, and Dani rocks her through it even as she feels her own body turning to liquid beneath Grace, drunk on the sight and sound and feel of her, and everything she’s finally let herself say out loud.
Ever mindful of her extra weight, Grace combines her eventual collapse with a scooping motion, hooking an arm around Dani and pulling her on top as Grace flops onto her back. Dani nuzzles into her chest for a moment, but before long Grace is lifting her chin and beckoning her for a long, wet kiss.
“So,” says Dani at last, pulling back to look Grace in the eye. “Sarah.”
Grace laughs in embarrassment, turning her head shyly before settling back down to meet Dani’s eyes again. It’s almost too cute for Dani to bear. “You’re impossible,” says Grace, and Dani feels the full force of the emotions behind it. It’s a funny choice of word, because being with Grace makes Dani feel like anything might be possible.
“You love it,” says Dani, her smile softening into something less teasing, a look that’s reflected back to her in Grace’s expression, too.
“Yeah, I do,” Grace replies.
There’s less talking involved when Grace gets to work on Dani, what with Grace’s mouth otherwise occupied, and Dani quickly losing the coherency to string together much more than a couple of words of encouragement. But after, as Dani waits for sleep to come, the things she said and the ways Grace responded echo in her head, and she thinks—hopes—wants. Dani wants , and it’s nice to know that Grace does, too.
Sarah’s a question she’ll have to get the answer to another day.
~
The night air is pleasantly cool against Sarah’s skin when she steps outside the motel for a smoke. She’s too on edge, almost ready to crawl out of her skin, but she’s not sure if she needs the cigarette more or just the excuse to get out of the room they’re all stuck sharing tonight. It’s been too long of a day on the road, and so hot out until now. It doesn’t normally bother her much, but today the heat’s been getting to her head. The breeze is a relief, as is the cigarette once she takes her first long drag.
Life on the run is nothing new to Sarah, but it’s been a long time since she’s had anyone with her, and she’s beginning to wonder how long this arrangement will remain tenable. Dani and Grace made sense to her at first, as much as anything in Sarah’s life could make sense. She sees the roles they fill for each other, and she knows there’s only so much room left for her. Walking in on them was hardly the first sign that they’re all outgrowing this situation, and Sarah doesn’t doubt she’ll be the one who needs to step aside when it starts feeling too crowded.
Yet something has shifted lately in a way she can’t account for. Dani’s always watched Sarah, but she knows by now that’s just part of Dani’s nature—always watching over and worrying about her people, and for better or worse, Sarah’s one of those people now. But the looks have gotten longer, less concerned, and Dani’s smile whenever Sarah meets her eyes carries the hint of a challenge. Meanwhile, Grace’s stare comes with a frown and never lingers when Sarah catches it, and it’s even stranger to her than Dani’s looks. It wasn’t so constant that she couldn’t ignore it before, but today they were only on the road for a couple of hours before she pulled over and suggested Dani get some practice, just so she could slide into the back seat behind them and get a break from feeling two sets of eyes boring into her.
From her new vantage point, Sarah took the opportunity to watch the two of them for a change. Usually she tries not to look too closely, like their casual affection might hurt her eyes if she looks right at them. They remind her of feelings she’s long forgotten to miss, things she barely remembered even wanting until now, and it makes her want a drink or five, to run away and hide smoke, to remember how to forget again. She was so good at that before. Now Sarah feels like a ghost haunting some sunnier version of her own past, waiting for it to burn her. Would she and Kyle have been like them, if he’d lived? Would she have even wanted that?
Outside the motel now, Sarah’s doing her best to hide these questions in a cloud of smoke, staring hard at the moon and willing her head to empty itself. She doesn’t look away when she hears the front door opening or Dani’s soft footfalls approaching her, doesn’t have to look up to know it’s her. Takes another drag, holds it in until her chest begins to ache, breathes it out toward the sky.
“There’s a microwave in the room,” says Dani, stopping at Sarah’s side. “We can heat up the sandwiches we bought.” She leaves her concern about whether Sarah’s eating enough unspoken, knowing by now how Sarah will react. Sarah’s told her she feels old when Dani fusses over her health, but that’s not exactly the truth. It’s uncomfortable for Sarah, feeling cared for.
“I’ll be in soon,” she lies, not sure when she’ll be ready to face the two of them and their gazes. There’s a long night ahead of them, but Sarah’s got plenty to smoke.
It’s an attempt at shaking Dani off, but it doesn’t work. “Thanks for letting me drive today,” says Dani. Sarah and Grace have been taking turns teaching her, and just like with everything else, Dani’s a quick study. Sarah likes to be at the wheel most of the time, but sooner or later, she’s going to be handing this whole war over to Dani. May as well start getting used to sharing the burden.
She looks from the moon to Dani, to the ground as she stamps out the butt of her cigarette. “You’re doing good,” says Sarah, facing her once more. “With all of it,” she decides to clarify. She wants another smoke, wants to look away from the moonlight reflected in Dani’s eyes, but something keeps her still. Might as well, while she’s here. “I know how hard it is, and I can’t tell you it gets any easier. But if anyone can handle it, it’s you.” And she means it: Dani’s clearly the new chosen one for a reason. Sarah would’ve chosen her, too.
She’s ready to think about anything but what that might mean when Dani takes her hand. It’s a familiar gesture, something they’ve done before because it’s how Dani communicates, something Sarah’s grown used to. Sometimes she appreciates the comfort herself. “Thank you,” says Dani, her smile all but glowing in the deep blue of the night. Sarah squeezes her hand back, inwardly reminding herself that this is innocent. Holding Dani’s hand doesn’t have to mean anything she isn’t ready to deal with.
But that’s the thing about Dani. She’s somehow both a steady, solid presence and a wild card, ten steps ahead of Sarah sometimes before she’s even realized they’re moving.
“Can I kiss you, Sarah?” she asks plainly, her voice unwavering, her expression calm and inviting. And just like that, the moment has become something new.
Sarah, not knowing how else to respond, huffs out a laugh. “Don’t you have Grace for that?” she quips, though it’s a serious question.
“Yes,” says Dani, “but I’m not asking her right now.” Sarah can barely even shoot her a skeptical look before Dani adds, “And she already knows that I want this.”
Dani wanting to kiss her is enough for Sarah to take in; that she’s talked about it with Grace makes it too real, and yet Sarah is the last to know. She needs another cigarette. She needs the moon to go out so she can slip away into the night. But she keeps standing there, her hand in Dani’s and her head spinning.
“I’m not sure why you would,” says Sarah, immediately annoyed with her voice for coming out so quietly. That was too honest, she knows as soon as she’s said it, and it makes Dani look so sad for a moment that she wishes she could take it back.
“Because you’re wonderful,” says Dani, quickly recovering her smile. “And beautiful. And I like you, and I think it would be nice.”
Dani makes it seem so easy to be this honest, but Sarah hardly remembers how to tell herself the truth. She fights to push through the clouds in her head, and her incredulity over someone like Dani thinking she’s beautiful, and the truest thought she finds is that yes, it almost certainly would be nice.
That shouldn’t be enough of a reason, and she has so many more reasons to say no. Because Dani is so young, so good, beautiful in ways she probably doesn’t even know. Because she deserves better than Sarah. Because Grace is in their room waiting for her, and Sarah knows it.
But Dani’s hand is warm in hers, and the moon is bright, and Sarah hasn’t had anything nice in a very long time.
“Okay,” she finally answers, and Dani’s smile alone makes it all worth it.
Dani’s kiss cuts through the fog in her head and clears away her doubts all at once. Her free hand moves to Sarah’s face, and she presses her lips to Sarah’s gently, but with that same certainty Sarah’s come to admire in all that Dani does. She leans down a little so Dani won’t have to strain herself, and Dani makes a soft, content noise, moving in closer. Sarah likes all of it. She wraps an arm around Dani’s waist, and they both like that even more. Then Dani’s hand on her face moves into her hair, and that’s better at quieting her brain than any drink Sarah could have.
A minute ago, all she wanted was to run away. Now she feels like she could stay here forever, with Dani’s lips on hers and her hand in her hair, gently tugging Sarah forward and holding her in place.
It’s only fair when Sarah hears the motel door being pushed open once more, Grace’s heavier footsteps nearing them before either she or Dani can react. Sarah’s reflexes are usually faster, which makes her wonder if she wanted Grace to see, or if Dani’s just that distracting. Maybe it’s both.
“Oh,” says Grace, stopped in her tracks a short distance away. She looks more uncomfortable than surprised, confirming that she and Dani really must have talked about this. “I’ll, uh...I’ll go,” she says, somehow seeming both hesitant to move and like she can’t get away fast enough.
“Are you okay?” asks Dani, clearly needing to know it’s still alright with Grace now that this hypothetical they’ve discussed has become a reality.
“I’m good,” says Grace, truthful as Sarah’s ever seen her. “Do you want me to...go...somewhere?”
Dani laughs softly. “No, we’ll be back inside soon.”
“Okay,” says Grace, lingering a beat longer than seems entirely natural to Sarah before striding back into the building.
Dani turns back to Sarah, smiling warmly. “Will you come in for dinner?” she asks, even though “dinner” in this case means gas station sandwiches and, if they’re really feeling classy, vodka and vending machine sodas out of plastic motel cups. But tonight it feels like more than enough.
“Yeah,” says Sarah, and she lets Dani lead her back inside, their hands still linked. She’s beginning to like letting Dani lead the way.
~
Grace means it, she really is okay with all of this. She knows how much Dani loves her, that they’re both all in. Nothing could ever call that into question.
The problem lies with Grace’s own feelings about Sarah. She can’t deny that she liked Sarah seeing her with Dani, but acting on that would be another story. Sometimes she feels like she and Sarah are playing a game of chicken, and Grace isn’t about to be the first to swerve—but the alternative is crashing into each other, and she hasn’t figured out if she’s ready for that yet.
Talking about it with Dani’s hand down her pants was one thing, but seeing Dani with Sarah is something else. Grace had wondered if she might feel differently when it actually happened, but it was just the opposite: she liked seeing them together, almost as much as she’d liked being seen. This is going to be a bigger problem than she’s anticipated.
She rushes back to their room on autopilot, trying not to think at all until she’s undressed and in the shower, the water as hot as it’ll go. The pressure isn’t as strong as she’d like, but she closes her eyes and lets it wash over her.
They could be back any second, but she’s going to go out of her mind if she doesn’t do something. Giving up, Grace slips a hand between her legs, getting right to it. She can’t get the image of Dani’s hand tugging on Sarah’s hair out of her head, and it gets her close faster than she’d ever admit to either of them.
She hears the door to their room open and shut and knows she has to be quick—and quiet. She picks up her pace, presses just a little harder, and with the image of them still in her mind, that’s all she needs. After, she washes her hair as her heart rate resets itself, cleans up and dries off in silence, praying that this has done the trick and she’ll be fine when she joins them in their room.
When she emerges, they’re sitting cross-legged on their own separate beds. Grace only meets Sarah’s eyes for a moment, too quick to discern what she finds there. But Dani eyes her wet hair with a smirk, and Grace knows she’s been caught.
“Hungry?” Dani asks her, cheeky as all hell as she holds out a sandwich. Grace pretends to ignore the knowing look Dani’s shooting her, even as she feels her cheeks turning warm. She won’t be able to pretend forever.
Nothing happens their next few days on the road, not even between Dani and Sarah; Dani says she doesn’t want to rush anything, for all of their sakes. Grace doesn’t want to hold her back, but she’s grateful for the time to think.
She can feel Sarah watching her in new ways, now, can tell they’re getting closer and closer on this collision course. Her looks used to be all full of suspicion, but now there’s something else there, and more and more Grace is wanting to pull it out into the light and lay it out between them, to see where that leaves them. It comes from the same part of Grace that wants to crack Sarah’s hard shell, to see her squirm, to be the one to make it happen.
They stop for the night at a nicer place than usual, more hotel than motel for once, and it’s worth it for how Dani lights up when she sees their room and flops onto the nearest bed. Grace wishes she could always give her this. Even the bathtub looks okay, for once, so Dani decides to have a soak. Nice as it would be to join her, it isn’t exactly practical with Grace’s long legs, so she leaves Dani to enjoy this small luxury on her own. That leaves Grace alone in the room, sitting on the bed Dani’s claimed for them with her legs stretched out in front of her, deep in thought already when Sarah gets back from her smoke, a bag of chips from the vending machine in hand.
Sarah sits across the room in one of the chairs by the table, fumbling with the bag. Grace tries to seem distracted, but the crinkling of the aluminum goes on longer than she expects without Sarah actually getting the bag open, and suddenly Grace can’t resist.
“Need some help?” she teases, biting back a grin when Sarah glares at her. Too easy.
Sarah scoffs, doesn’t bother to reply—but she tosses the bag onto the table, unopened, choosing to stare through the gap in the blinds instead. Interesting, thinks Grace.
The joke is that even with her superhuman strength, there’s not much Grace could do for Sarah that she couldn’t do for herself. She’s watched Sarah handle all manner of weapons with ease—in fact, Grace has probably watched Sarah’s hands a little too closely, impressed by their deftness, idly wondering what else they might be good for. Sarah is surprisingly strong, too, in every way that seems to drive Grace wild. She felt it even when she had Sarah pinned against the wall of her motel room, an intensity only momentarily restrained, and the memory of it fills her with wanting.
Examining her from across the room, the dying sunlight playing across Sarah’s features, Grace likes everything she sees. Her strength is accompanied by a softness Grace isn’t sure Sarah wants anyone to see, but now that she’s noticed it, she can’t go back. The truth is that Sarah is beautiful, and competent in all the ways Grace can’t help but admire, and she can’t deny that she wants her, anymore.
She doesn’t realize how hard she’s been staring or how long they’ve been sitting in silence until Sarah breaks it, doesn’t look away until it’s a beat too late. “Something I can do for you? ” asks Sarah, and Grace tries to busy herself looking down at her own hands, knowing Sarah must see through her.
“I’m good, thanks,” she attempts, casting a glance toward the bathroom, wondering how much longer Dani will be in there.
There’s a long enough pause that Grace thinks maybe she’s dodged this, for now, before Sarah speaks again. “If you’ve got a problem with all this, you should tell Dani,” she says, and that’s more blunt than anything Grace was expecting. “I’m not looking to cause any trouble,” she continues, and Grace nearly laughs out loud, because, well, since when does Sarah ever stay out of trouble?
“I don’t…” care what you do with Dani , she thinks maybe she should say, except that would be a lie. It’s just the opposite, really—she cares a little too much, in all the wrong ways. Maybe the right ones, depending on Sarah’s point of view. “I don’t have a problem with it,” she says instead, avoiding Sarah’s eyes.
She feels Sarah watching her for a long moment. “Huh,” she finally says, sitting back in her chair, stretching her legs out, and even just glimpsed in Grace’s peripheral vision, it sends a jolt of desire unbidden throughout her body. Something inside her will have to break soon.
Sarah stands then, crosses the room toward Grace, headed for the minibar, and Grace feels it starting. In one fluid motion, she’s off the bed and blocking Sarah’s path, staring down at her without making contact. Sarah looks her hard in the eye, clearly aiming for expressionless, but her face betrays her just enough for Grace to know she’s not alone in this.
“Can I help you?” she asks, still not making this easy for Grace.
“Do you always have to be so…”
Sarah quirks an eyebrow. “You gonna do something, or what?”
Grace makes a sound somewhere between a heavy sigh and a growl as she slams Sarah’s back into the wall, so they’re chest to chest, this time, not looking anywhere but each other’s faces.
Her augments alert her to the increase in Sarah’s heart rate and body temperature, but she doesn’t really need enhanced sensory readings to tell her all that, and she certainly doesn’t need anything more than her eyes to see the way Sarah licks her lips as she stares up at her.
“Well?” Sarah prods her when she lingers in this moment just a little too long.
And Grace exhales hard again before crashing into Sarah once and for all, kissing her as if to devour.
If this means she’s lost the game, Grace can’t say she minds.
Sarah gives as good as she gets, and Grace feels like she’s on fire already. There isn’t an inch of Sarah she doesn’t want to touch, and it’s so much that she’s not sure where to start, her hands everywhere at once. Before long she can feel Sarah getting shaky, pinned between her and the wall. Good , thinks Grace with what’s left of her mental faculties—let her see what it’s like to feel weak in the knees, too. It’s only fair.
Sarah’s nails dig into Grace’s sides through her shirt, and it only registers as pure pleasure. She feels Sarah biting her lip, and god , she’s going to make her pay for that, she’s going to—
The bathroom door opens with a click .
And there’s Dani, her wet hair brushed back off her face, wearing only a bathrobe and a look of surprised, heated delight.
“Is this happening?” she asks, not bothering to hide her excitement.
“Apparently,” says Sarah, and it drags Grace’s eyes back to her long enough to clock the slight flush to her cheeks, along with the way she sounds breathless already. Grace smirks.
“Do you want me to go?” asks Dani, and Grace feels herself shaking her head before she even means to.
“Not a chance,” she replies, but then she catches herself, turns back to Sarah at the same time Dani’s eyes flit expectantly toward her. The air feels thicker between all of them. It’s up to her, now.
Sarah looks from Grace to Dani, and the weight of this seems to settle over them all at once. Grace holds her breath until something like a smile begins to tug at the corners of Sarah’s mouth.
“Get over here,” says Sarah, and a new feeling swells in Grace’s chest that she wasn’t expecting. Like it’s just what she’s been hoping for all along, even if she’s only just realized it. Like she and Sarah have been two rocks in space hurtling toward each other, threatening to smash each other into a million pieces, but Dani has pulled them both into her orbit, instead. She is their gravity, keeping them steady, and it works, like this. They all fit together, just like this.
Dani moves in close, and Sarah’s breath catches in her throat, and Grace thinks that nothing’s ever felt so right.