Work Text:
Company Retreat
Michelle Tally wasn't much of the 'company retreat' sort. She had, however, been given directive to send her team on a company retreat filled with team building exercises and 'icebreaker' sorts of activities. Tally had repeatedly informed the human resources department that Turks did not do icebreakers. She had also been given the rather inane task of 'closing up' the retreat in the office. So she called everyone in and watched as they lazed around the large Turk Lounge. "Alright, so I'm supposed to read these little slips of paper that the HR person gave me." She read the note attached. "You were instructed to write down one fun, or interesting detail about everyone of your teammates."
Immediately Rod went white. "You're reading them?"
"I'm supposed to."
Vincent snickered in the way that said he was up to something.
"Science boy, knock-it off." As Vincent cleared his throat, Tally pulled her chair around and opened the box. "Reno must have five livers to drink that much." She could feel a headache brewing.
"Fuck yeah!" Reno and Rude high fived each other and she sent them a glare.
"To continue... Veld is double jointed." Tally knew where this was going.
"VALENTINE!"
"I didn't know people would read it!"
This must have been someone's way of getting back at her. Tally sighed and continued. "Apparently Vincent's dick is legendary."
The room went quiet. But Veld glared at Tseng.
"Not my fault you talk in Wutain when you get drunk." The young man protested.
"You. Junon, three weeks." Veld ordered crisply.
Tally groaned. "If this one is about sex, we're done here. Anna has hot tits."
"RODNEY EMMANUEL FITZBURG!" The blonde Turk protested. "I thought you were passed out!"
"I didn't ASK you to change in front of me!" Rod ducked behind Cornelius who looked around for salvation.
"What did you guys do in this retreat?" Tally unceremoniously dropped the box in the shred bin.
Everyone looked at the second in command, Veld who shrugged. "HR wanted to pull rank, I let them." Veld was young and his smirk was devilish.
"...how many died?"
Her team looked at each other and Vincent shook his head. "He was breathing when we left him at the hospital."
"Vince IS a doctor." Katana responded.
"Everyone write an expenses report on the weekend. INCLUDING beverages and "entertainment". I'll be in my office." She should have been angry, but Tally really felt rather smug.
Turks just didn't DO Ice Breakers.