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Cooking with his Highness was always a little bit of the same to Dedue, always in a good way. But for one reason, there was one day that stuck with him.
It was during the relatively peaceful days back at the Garreg Mach Academy. The sun was high in the sky, the day was warm. It was right after lunch time so they had the entire kitchen to them after they came back from the market with all the fresh products they needed. They began to wash and cut the vegetable in a comfortable silence, as always. Their cooking session was accompanied by the sound of other student enjoying their day off, fishing in the pond nearby or chatting in the gardens next to the refectory. If he was really careful, Dedue could even hear the clash of blades coming all the way from the training grounds.
Most of the students considered cooking a duty, especially when it was with the person whom looking after was their job. They preferred to pend their time enjoying their hobbies. But cooking was one of Dedue's hobby. And those kind of moments spent alone with his Highness were the best kinds to him.
He could never admit it, much less tell it to anyone else, but he felt a certain way when he was alone with his prince. Usually he felt a little uncomfortable when he was around other people. He always felt like his presence was too much, made them feel awkward, he felt that he needed to say something even though he had nothing to say. He was just afraid he really wasn't a very interesting person.
But with his Highness, it was different. They only needed to spend some quiet time together. They didn't have to talk. Ha was always wary of his prince's reputation, but when they were cooking together there was no one else to see them. There was only a comforting companionship.
Dedue never tried to understand why he felt this was in particular, only with him. He tried to never think too much about the times his gaze lingered on his prince's body during their trainings together. Or when Sylvain talked about girls he though pretty, he could only think that his prince was the prettiest person he knew. The bravest. The strongest. The kindest.
He had to admit he was a little afraid of what he might understand about himself. He preferred to think that he was only being a serviceable vassal, and that both him and his charge enjoyed it.
He was almost sure that his Highness enjoyed it as much he did. Because when it was time to cook the vegetables, he walked closer to him and inhaled deeply the aroma coming from the pan Dedue was using. Sometimes he suspected that he enjoyed smelling the food more than actually tasting it. The prince left his eyes close, as to better concentrate on the smell. His face lit up.
“This smells so appetizing.” His Highness hummed. “You truly are an excellent chef, Dedue.”
“Thank you, your Highness.” The Duscur man tried to control the joy he felt at the praise. He heard it from many of his classmates but for a reason, everything felt different when it came from his Highness.
“It seems almost impossible but I have the feeling that you just keep on getting better.” The prince continued. “I wonder... Is there something that pushes you to always improve?”
“You are exaggerating.” Dedue said, feeling that he could not take much more compliments.
“I am not.” His Highness insisted. He looked displeased, and disappointed.
A part of Dedue felt bad. He knew his prince didn't like it when he underestimated himself. But he felt his face growing too hot under the attention. Still, his Highness seemed to drop the matter, going back to his station to cut the rest of the vegetables. He supposed he was lucky none of them liked to push the other.
They went back to one of their usual comfortable silence, only filled by the sound of the sizzling vegetables in Dedue's pan and his Highness's knife rhythmically hitting the cutting board. Dedue left his gaze drift to him. His prince had a focused frown digging in his forehead. He was fully concentrated on his task, careful to control his strength to avoid breaking the knife he was using.
His Highness was the one who had come to him at the beginning of the year. He had asked that Dedue teaches him to cook to relieve him a little bit of his duty, since he was always the one in charge of the food when the class went on campaigns. Of course, at first he had refused. He could not let his Highness take on his tasks. He already had his own duty: setting the camp. But he was always quick to get to work, and quick to finish. He had insisted that he needed to know how to make good dishes for when it would be his turn in kitchen duty.
In the end, Dedue wondered who was humoring whom.
“There is one thing…” Dedue began to speak again, and he immediately had his prince's attention again. “A goal that I set to myself. Until I reach it, I can never truly consider myself a chef. It keeps me improving.”
“Oh… I wonder what that is?” The blond asked.
There was a look on his prince's face. It was wonder, with no trace of darkness. His expression was relaxed, devoid of any tiredness. His eyes were sparkling with curiosity, their bright blue glowing with the reflection of the sun shining through the windows of the kitchens. His blond hair was a little messy, a few strands out of place, but the rays of sunshine that reached them made them reflect its light, almost creating a halo of white around him. He was glowing.
Yet, Dedue was convinced that he could glow even brighter. He had seen his prince smile on a few occasions only. Not a bitter smile, or the smile of a challenger. A smile of pure joy. And on these few occasions, he left him completely struck but his beauty. The beauty of his smile.
It was something Dedue wanted to see again. Something he wanted to recreate. With what he was best at. With his cooking.
But he knew it was a foolish thought. Just like every thought he had about his prince.
“I'm afraid it must yet remain a secret to you.” Dedue replied, and they went back their silent cooking.
Years later, this conversation comes back to Dedue from times to times.
He thinks it may have something to do with the weather, or the activity of the day. The weather is particularly lovely. The sky is a clear blue outside of the royal greenhouse, and the ray of sun filtering through its windows warm him in a comforting way. His knees ache a little bit from the kneeling position he is in, but he doesn't mind.
As it is now in their habits, Dimitri and him are picking vegetables in the greenhouse he tends to in his free time to cook them later. As much as his king loves to partake in his hobbies with him he is still a beginner in the art of gardening so Dedue has to show him which plants are ready for the picking, but he lets him chose. It is a little thing but it makes him happy.
Dimitri too, if he can believe the excitement he shows. His hair is as long as always, still shining with the light of the sun, framing his beautiful face in light. He pulled it up in ponytail to be able to work in the garden with Dedue today, which allows him to see better his face. His skin tone is pink and healthy, there are no dark circles under his eye, which shimmers with his excitement. It shines in Dedue's favorite color, and he knows he could get lost in it for hours. But the most beautiful part of him is his smile.
Dimitri smiles much more often since the war has ended. He smiles politely when he thanks his servants for their services or when he needs to chat with nobles, but he also laughs much more often. Thanks a lot to Alois's jokes which he doesn't hold back anytime he comes to visit Firdhiad. Dedue loves to hear the sound of his laughter, filling the air light and bright. He love to see him smile widely when he gets overly joyous over good news. He loves the more tender, intimate smiles he gives only to him. Smiles that reach into his heart and makes him feel like time has stopped.
“What about this one, my love?” Dimitri pulls him out of his reverie.
Dedue looks at the vegetable Dimitri is showing, and nods. But his gaze his suddenly attracted by something reflecting the light on Dimitri's left hand during the motion of picking up the vegetable. A simple ring of gold, with discreet flower patterns engraved in it. Inside of it, hidden, there are two Ds. It matches the one Dedue is wearing on his own ring finger.
His past self could never have conceived such a thing. He was still obsessed with his prince's status and his reputation. A part of him still thought there was no future for Duscur, and that the people of Faerghus could never see him in a better light. Never stand to see him be his prince's equal. So to think that Dimitri could return his feelings, to think that he could take him as his husband...
He feels his heart soaring with pride and love for the man he decided to spend his life with. The man who makes him happy. The man he wants to see smile always.
Dedue suddenly understands why the memory of this day, this specific cooking session came back to him. He supposes he never truly told him. He told Dimitri that he loved him a hundred times, in many different ways. But he never answered one question.
He takes his husband's hand in his, and when he turns his blue eye filled with affection to him, he answers. “Your smile is what makes me want to get better.”
As a reply to his wish, Dimitri smiles at him, and like at the beginning of their love, his heart skips a beat.