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As if Hebe deemed us not deserving of youth, it was taken away from us. The talks we had, the nights we spent together, even the fights—it all vanished from my memory like a carefully-spun web ruthlessly slashed by the sharpest of knives. Only her scent lingered, along with the bitter taste of regret—regret of being helpless to stop the goddess of eternal youth from taking what so little precious time we had, away from us.
I opened my eyes and looked at my surroundings. The scenery that I became familiar with came into view. It was the same weird dream I’ve been having every day since I woke up from the accident. I was in a small coffee shop and there were seven other people with me. But I can’t hear them nor see their faces—they were blurry.
There was something in my heart that was telling me I knew these people, that I shared my deepest fears and secrets, that I spent my days with them where I smiled and laughed with no care in the world—
But whatever I do, I couldn’t remember who they were.
As I paid attention to what was going on again, I realize something was different tonight. I can definitely hear them, but there was a light irradiating from their wrists that left me mesmerized. I was not able to focus on what the seven guys were saying.
As I tried to figure out what that light was, I tuned out the sound and decided to try and listen to their conversation later.
“Wa….nghwa…..SEONGHWA”
I looked up and realized I can hear them. It was actually one of the guys calling me, but that’s odd, they never talked to me before.
“You’re talking to me?” I say, confused.
“Of course, is there someone else here called Seonghwa?” One of them, the tallest one, says back.
“I couldn’t really know that since I don’t know who you are.” I decided to say, this way I might get some answers.
“What do you mean you don’t who we are hyung, are you pranking us or something?”
Hyung?
Guess they were younger than me and close enough to me to call me that, but I still didn’t know who they were.
“I’m not pranking you, I really don’t know who you are. But, if I may ask, what do you have on your wrists?” I really need to get some answers, I was never able to talk with them.
“You have to be kidding Seonghwa, it’s the bracelets I bought for us. You didn’t lose our bracelet, did you?” This time the one who talked was the smallest one but his words left me confused, what does he mean by our bracelet?
My thoughts were cut short when one of them said, “Do you seriously not remember the bracelets Hongj—”
As if I was dreaming within my own dream, it all faded away and before I even had the opportunity to think about anything, I woke up, only remembering one sentence.
“You didn’t lose our bracelet, did you?”
What?
I knew for sure more things happened this time so why can I only remember that?
Think Seonghwa, think, did they say any names? Even an address would help…
But I knew it was futile. They didn’t say anything useful. No names, no addresses, just a bracelet.
Should I look for it? He did say ‘our’, that means I probably have one too.
I didn’t have that many jewelry, might as well try to find that bracelet.
I got out of my bed and went to the vanity table in the corner of my room to start searching through my boxes for a blue bracelet. I searched for an hour but I couldn’t find even a glimpse. As I was about to give up, I caught a box in the corner of my eye. I got closer to it and saw a small wooden chest with handmade engravings all over it. ‘ATEEZ’, the intricate engraving looped in the center.
I opened the lock and it revealed a single bracelet made of a simple chain.
“I don’t remember having this at all, where did it come from?” I think aloud, confused.
Knowing I wouldn’t get any answers, I decided to inspect the simple chain closely to try to find any clues as to why I have it.
It might be the bracelet they were talking about in my dream, after all.
I picked up the bracelet and right away, I noticed something’s written on its tiny metal plate. I brought it closer to my face to read it and I realise it has an address.
“It’s an address? I should go there.” I say, incredulous at the luck I had. I wasn’t expecting to get such a big hint this fast. I guess I was lucky and I was definitely not wasting this opportunity.
I went to my bedside table and quickly searched for the address while getting ready to go out. I was anxious about diving into the unknown, but this had to be done. I needed to find out more about this right now. I finished putting on my shoes and left my house hurriedly.
The address was supposed to lead me to a place next to the bridge near my apartment but I didn’t remember going there so I was not sure what awaited me in that spot. I cleared my mind of these thoughts and started running.
I can’t slow down now, a mantra of encouragement pushed me forward. I felt like there was something important on this mysterious location and I needed to find out what it was.
After running for ten minutes, I finally reached the bridge. I took a moment to catch my breath and as I looked up I was met with a breathtaking view. The place I was looking for ended up being a beautiful flower field that resembled a rainbow, filled to the brim with color and light—truly a sight any human would love to get even a small glimpse of.
After overcoming the initial shock, I started to slowly and carefully go further down the field. A slightly louder noise or a stronger step felt like a grievous disruption to the peace in the meadow.
I walked for a bit more until I see something in the distance. Heart beating to the tolling of the drums in my stomach, I ran towards it. I found myself in front of a single beautiful carved stone, as beautiful and almost melancholic in the sea of flowers that surrounded it.
Confused, I read out loud the script engraved in the marble stone:
“Here lay the bodies of Kim Hongjoong, Jung Yunho, Kang Yeosang, Choi San, Song Mingi, Jung Wooyoung and Choi Jongho, seven men deeply loved by their families and friends. They will never be forgotten, may their souls rest in peace.”
It was then I felt the deepest pain, an ache in my chest that was swallowing my very soul. I couldn’t recall who those people were but I knew I’m one of those friends that deeply loves them.
I closed my eyes as I feel myself tearing up and at that moment, memories started flashing in front of my eyes.
My house, a classroom, the coffee shop, this flower field, so many places go through my mind I could barely keep up with it.
They kept coming and it seemed like it was not gonna end until suddenly I opened my eyes, gasping.
“I remember, I remember them, I remember what happened” These words left my lips as I fell on my knees, crying.
“You idiots, this is our special spot that’s why you are buried here right?” I said between my tears to no one in particular. Only the grave was there. That was fine. They can hear me. Wherever they are.
“I love you guys so much, I’m sorry I forgot you, it won’t happen again. There’s no way I’m forgetting you seven annoying dorks.” I continued. “I’m sorry our trip was ruined like that, we planned it for so long and we just wanted to take a break from everything… the light was green, we should’ve been able to cross the road but that driver wasn’t careful, it was red for him but he still continued driving at full speed until his truck hit our little van… I miss you, I miss you so much but I know I’ll get over this eventually.” I got up while wiping my tears.
“I’ll never forget you, I’ll never leave you behind, instead I’m gonna live my life for you. This is not a goodbye, it’s just a see you later.” I smiled and turned around, tears streaming down my face, and walked back to the bridge.
But I won’t stay sad for long, they would want me to be happy and so I’m gonna do everything I can to let that happen.
Everyone left but I don’t feel lonely anymore, I might have thought we lost our youth but that’s not true either. I soon realized that Hebe gifted me all their youths and gave me the responsibility, the will, to live their lives for them and that’s what I’m gonna do, I won’t be alone again because they will be by my side from now on. I will always love those seven guys and they’ll be forever on my mind and heart…
My eternal brothers, I’ll never forget you.