Work Text:
Perhaps if he had listened closely, he would have heard the signs.
From the first moment with Kei’s hands curled in his collar, Tobio had been watching. There was a myriad of things to see, every day to discover with Kei: from the way he grew into his fast-developed body, learnt its better use, to the slow marring of his hands with bruises, callouses, as he handled more volleyballs. The silent decay of his jaded attitude, crumbling out of his fingers with which he connected the two of them in the smallest of touches: fingers in the hollow of his elbow to slow him down to Hinata’s short-legged pace, fingers on his back to sign a change of course in matches, fingers on his thigh as Kei explained a geometry problem for the fourth time. How his eyes met Tobio’s more often, more boldly, the more time spent breathing the same rubber smell in the gym.
Connected arms, together on the court with the same goal in mind; disconnected hearts, cumbrous mass of bitterness frozen with the passage of time.
A bridge is built from stone, cement, steel. Calculations are made so it can hold its own weight. When you delve right into it, the way Kei and Tobio did, eyes shut, nothing in your ear but the howling of the wind from how fast you’re going, you raise chaos the clumsy bridge won’t carry.
A teenage boy’s mistakes may not ruin his life, but missed chances leave a taste of regret no wine can wash away. Not listening, giving your all to seeing, means you miss the change of music bleeding out of Kei’s headphones. Means you miss the tilt in his voice, evident of a strain to hide. And didn’t you know? When a heart breaks, its sound echoes in the chest cavity.
Teenage boys don’t know teardrop from blood, let alone hate from love. When you’re hated, it burns just the same as love. You’re nothing but ashes in the blink of an eye.
The next time you love someone, do it in the sluice of rain, not the waves of an ocean, in the steam from a mug of tea, not the flames from a wildfire. This is a lesson both you and I had to learn the hard way, Kei.