Work Text:
Cameron blinks at her monitor, her brain struggling to make sense of the long string of letters where her code should be. It takes her a moment or two to figure out that she must’ve fallen asleep at some point with her arm on the keyboard—she scrolls up past lines and lines of just the letter H before she finally reaches the last line of real code she wrote. The screen tells her it’s a little after eleven AM, and Cameron’s not sure when she last looked at the time. She remembers Donna coming in a little while after the sun came up, pressing her to go to bed, kissing her on the cheek before she left for work herself. But her memory of what they actually said to each other is so vague, she almost feels like she dreamt it. She must’ve been half asleep at the time.
She knows she isn’t twenty-five anymore. One of these days she’s going to have to admit defeat and quit pulling all nighters, but she was on a roll last night.
She deletes the extraneous characters from her code and saves her work before heading downstairs in search of coffee. She hears the TV before she spots Haley on the couch, and Haley starts when she sees her.
“Oh, I didn’t know you were home,” she says, relaxing again.
“Playing hooky?” asks Cameron, instantly cringing at herself. She knows Haley’s had a hard time at school the last few years, and Cameron doesn’t blame her. High school, she remembers, was a very particular brand of hell. She doesn’t want to be too hard on Haley, especially when she really gets it, but she also thinks she’s probably supposed to be the grown up in this situation.
“We have a substitute in English,” says Haley. “She always makes us watch movies for little kids even though we’re old enough to drive.” Cameron chuckles at that. “I’m going back after lunch,” Haley adds for good measure.
“It’s cool,” says Cameron. “What’d you find to watch instead?”
She makes to flop down into one of the cushiony living room chairs before the faces on the screen stop her in her tracks: there’s Gordon, laughing and embracing Haley on her fifteenth birthday, when they went out to the Airstream to launch model rockets. Though she isn’t on the screen, Cameron remembers laughing along with them behind the camera, and there’s a tug at her heart seeing them like that.
Haley’s seventeenth birthday is a week away. It’s been nearly two years since that day, and the anniversary of Gordon’s death isn’t far behind it.
“I realized I never actually watched the video,” says Haley. She turns back to the screen, smiling. “I’m glad we have this. Thanks for filming it.”
“Of course,” says Cameron softly. “I was happy to do it. That was a fun day.”
They watch the tape together in silence for a minute or so before Cameron speaks again, carefully. “When I was a kid, my dad and I made this stuffed animal. I named it Augie after the cartoon dog. It wasn’t much, but I loved that thing. Wouldn’t go anywhere without it.” She takes a deep breath. “After he died, it made me feel like a part of him was still with me. I carried it everywhere with me in my backpack until I was like, twenty-three.”
“Wait, I remember that,” says Haley. “Didn’t you show it to me and Joanie once when we were little?”
She did, Cameron realizes. It was that miserable day at Cardiff when Joe had made her think she’d lost all her work, and Cameron had offered to watch the kids while Donna worked on retrieving her data. She hadn’t been so bad at entertaining a couple of kids, until she’d freaked out and scared them with her blow torch trick.
“Yeah, I guess I did,” she answers. “Surprised you remember.”
“Do you still have it?” asks Haley.
Cameron nods. “At the Airstream.”
Haley looks back at the TV. “My dad made this tape he used to listen to whenever he was stressed out,” she says. “It was just him talking, reminding himself he was okay. I like listening to it while I work on stuff. It helps me focus.”
The tape turns to static, and Haley turns it off and begins to rewind. “We should do that again sometime,” she says.
“The rockets?” asks Cameron. She feels a lightbulb flick on over her head. “What are you doing for your birthday?”
Haley shrugs. “I might go to the movies with Jill and Amanda that weekend.”
“But on the actual day?”
“Probably nothing. It’s a weekday.”
“Let’s do it,” says Cameron. “I mean, if you want to.”
“It’s okay,” says Haley. “I know you and Mom are really busy at work lately—”
“Not too busy to celebrate your birthday,” says Cameron, cutting her off.
“If you’re sure you have the time…” says Haley, lighting up, “then yeah. I’d like that.”
Cameron grins.
~
The bedroom door is ajar when Cameron comes up the stairs, and she pushes it open quietly even though the light’s on—she’s found Donna asleep that way before, even still in her work clothes once or twice. It’s been like this a lot of nights lately, one of them frequently working later than the other, Donna dealing with office emergencies and business meetings at snobby restaurants, Cameron getting hit with strokes of inspiration and coding late into the night. There’s a part of Cameron that still feels like the bedroom is Donna’s rather than theirs, but the way she lets herself in without hesitation now goes to show how comfortable she is there now, at least.
Cameron finds Donna sitting up in bed, reading over some work papers in her nightgown. “Hey,” says Cameron brightly, closing the door with her foot before setting the cardboard box she’s carrying down on the carpet.
“Hey. What’s all that?” asks Donna, putting her papers aside.
Beaming, Cameron opens the box and pulls out one of the model rockets to show her. “I got them for Haley’s birthday. Thought we could take them out to the Airstream like we did that year with Gordon. She said she wanted to do it again, so...”
Donna laughs, shaking her head. “Cam...she’ll love that.” She’s smiling so fondly at her that Cameron almost feels bashful.
She puts the rocket away and crosses the room, leaning over the bed to give Donna a peck on the lips. “How was dinner?”
“Dull,” says Donna. “We could’ve closed the deal by eight if Trip had stopped hassling the buyer for golf tips for a couple of minutes.”
“Sounds awful,” says Cameron, lifting her shirt over her head and tossing it on the floor. She knows her messiness gets on Donna’s nerves, but doing things like that to get a rise out of her is part of the fun.
“Yeah, you’d better not leave me alone for that meeting with the mobile startup guys on Friday,” Donna reminds her. “I’m going to need all the help I can get defusing that awkwardness.”
“Since when do I make anything less awkward?” asks Cameron.
“You’re not awkward with me,” Donna remarks, smirking as she unashamedly watches Cameron change for bed.
Cameron can’t help but roll her eyes. “Yeah, but I’m not sleeping with the mobile startup guys.”
She washes up quickly before climbing into bed next to Donna, who flicks off the lamp next to her a moment later. She pulls the covers up over their shoulders and settles on her side facing Donna.
“Hi,” Donna whispers happily.
“Hi,” Cameron replies, moving in to kiss her again, more slowly this time.
Donna smiles sleepily at her as she pulls away. “So rockets, huh?”
“I found her watching the video I took of it the last time. She wasn’t upset, or anything,” she quickly assures Donna. “She looked happy to remember him like that.” She pauses. “If I had a video of one of the last days I spent with my dad, I’d be happy to watch it, too.” Donna reaches to cup her face, brushing a thumb across her cheek comfortingly. “Anyway, I just thought it would be nice.”
“It is nice,” says Donna, snuggling up closer to Cameron. “You’re nice,” she says before laying another kiss on Cameron’s lips.
Cameron raises her eyebrows as she pulls back. “I’m not sure I’m nice.”
“Well you sure feel nice,” says Donna with a smirk, running a hand over the exposed skin below the hem of Cameron’s tank top. Cameron resists the urge to roll her eyes again, deciding that kissing Donna is a higher priority than making fun of her for her corny lines.
Donna hums in contentment when Cameron threads her fingers through her hair, idly twirling it until Donna’s breathing begins to even out. It always takes Cameron longer to fall asleep, and it isn’t rare for her to lie there with Donna until she’s out, then sneak away to work on some code or listen to music. But tonight, tired from her all nighter, and with Donna’s hand still resting on the small of her back, she’s happy to stay put.
~
Cameron answers when Joanie calls from college the next day, giving her the perfect opportunity to set the other part of her plan into motion.
“I know it’s the middle of the week, but do you think you could get away for Haley’s birthday?”
“Oh shit, that’s next week, isn’t it?” says Joanie. “I’ll get a bus ticket.”
“Don’t worry about that, I’ll book you a flight,” says Cameron.
“Seriously?”
“What?” asks Cameron. “I’m good for it.”
Joanie laughs. “I know that. You planning a wild party, or what?”
“You’ll see,” says Cameron. “But don’t tell Haley you’re coming, okay?”
~
They decide to paint the rockets in the backyard on Saturday, when everyone’s home and just in the mood to hang out together. Haley covers hers in shooting stars and comets, and Cameron suspects that Donna feels the same relief she does that Haley’s memories of Comet are happy ones. Cameron’s decided to go old school, covering hers in messy renderings of her favourite bands’ logos. Donna uses the finest brush they have to paint a surprisingly intricate circuitry design on hers, which Cameron and Haley are both impressed by.
“Mom?” asks Haley, breaking the comfortable silence they’ve been working in for the last few minutes. “Did you ever like a woman before Cam?”
Cameron and Donna automatically lock eyes, but Cameron can’t quite tell how Donna feels. After a moment of quiet, she looks back at Haley. “I don’t know, sweetie.”
“What do you mean?”
Donna sighs. “Well, I never really thought about it before Cam and I started seeing each other,” she explains. “I didn’t even think it was an option when I was younger, and then I married your father and I didn’t have to think about it. But I do wonder, now, if maybe it’s something that was there all along and I just didn’t know it.”
Haley nods once like all that makes sense to her. “Well, was there ever an actress you really, really liked?” she asks. “Or a singer?”
Donna looks thoughtful. “I don’t know,” she says again. “Why, do you have a celebrity crush?” she teases.
“Corin Tucker, duh,” says Haley, not bothering to remind Donna who that is. “But if we’re talking my first one, definitely Linda Hamilton in Terminator 2. ”
“Ooh, yeah,” Cameron chimes in, looking back up from her rocket to smirk at Donna. “It’s the arms.”
Donna can hardly argue with that. “They are good arms.”
Haley turns around where she’s sitting to face Cameron. “So who was yours?”
“Easy,” says Cameron. “Nichelle Nichols on Star Trek. ”
“Nice,” says Haley approvingly.
When Cameron was a teenager, she would have never been able to talk to her mother this openly—and her mother probably wouldn’t have wanted to listen, anyway. She’s glad that it’s different for Haley, that she and Donna can both be there for her like this.
~
Cameron’s on the verge of falling asleep early, for once, when Donna speaks.
“Jane Fonda,” she says, quiet but clear in the stillness of their bedroom.
“What?”
“I think she was my first female celebrity crush.”
Cameron turns over in bed to face Donna, who’s staring up at the ceiling.
“My mom took me to see Barefoot in the Park when I was thirteen,” she continues, “and I got kind of obsessed for a while. Made a point to go see anything I heard she was in.”
“Oh my god,” says Cameron. “You do those cheesy exercise tapes, don’t you?”
“No!” Donna protests. “...Only a couple, and I lost them in the move to California.”
Cameron leans in, smiling gleefully now. “Did you wear the spandex?”
“Okay, goodnight!” says Donna, rolling over and turning her back to Cameron. Undeterred, Cameron presses in close and snakes an arm around Donna’s waist, and Donna nestles back into her in response. She buries her face in Donna’s hair, breathing in her familiar scent, and sighs peacefully.
~
On Haley’s birthday, they pick her up from school in Cameron’s truck and head to the airport.
“Wait, where are we going?” Haley asks when Cameron pulls off the highway at the exit for the airport.
“There’s someone else we need to pick up,” says Donna, and Cameron grins when Haley shrieks in the backseat.
~
When Joanie walks through the doors to the arrivals area, Haley runs over and tackles her, as if it’s been years since they’ve seen each other and not just a few months since the Christmas break. Donna’s not far behind, and Cameron watches them happily as Donna wraps her arms around both her daughters.
~
Everyone’s hungry when they get to the Airstream, so the first thing Cameron does is get a fire going so they can roast hot dogs and marshmallows. They brought a cooler full of soda and a couple bags of chips, too, and by the time they’re all full and ready to launch the rockets, the sun is already starting to set, streaking the sky with brilliant orange and pink. They aren’t going to be able to film the festivities in this lighting, but Donna does make sure to snap a few Polaroids to remember the night by. The Big Dipper is already visible in the sky, and they hurry to prepare everything before it can get any darker.
Finally, Haley counts them down to lift off, and they all send their rockets soaring into the evening sky. As they watch them climb, and Joanie and Haley jokingly bicker over whose rocket is going faster and higher, Donna strolls over to Cameron’s side, taking her hand.
“Thank you for this,” she tells her, and Cameron squeezes her hand in reply. They watch as more stars begin to peek out and the rockets come back down to Earth, and Cameron feels weightless.
~
While Haley describes her latest coding project to Donna in detail, Joanie fills Cameron in on what she’s been up to in L.A. (though Cameron suspects she’s leaving out the most scandalous details of some of her nights out). “Thanks again for bringing me home for this,” she says eventually.
“‘Course, kiddo,” says Cameron.
They watch the fire in silence for a while before Joanie speaks again.
“I think Dad would’ve understood. You and Mom.”
Cameron freezes for a moment, taken aback. “I don’t know about that…”
“I mean yeah, he freaked out a little when Haley cut all her hair off, but it’s not like he had a problem with it.” Joanie shrugs. “He had Joe and that guy he dated for a while over for dinner once. I mean, it was awkward, but that wasn’t because he was a dude. It’s because it was Joe.”
Cameron barks out a laugh at that. “Yeah, that sounds about right.”
“You guys were friends,” Joanie goes on. “And he knew how close you and Mom used to be. Sure it would’ve been weird at first, but...I think he would’ve been cool with it, eventually.”
Cameron lets out a breath she didn’t mean to hold. “Thanks,” she says. “I guess you’re not a dick all the time,” she adds jokingly, earning a shove from Joanie.
“Asshole,” Joanie mutters with a laugh.
“Watch it,” says Cameron. “Remember how I used to be able to turn you upside down? Bet I still could if I tried.”
“Keep telling yourself that, Grandma.”
~
Later, after Cameron and Donna have finished tidying and packing everything up for the night, Cameron steps out of the Airstream to find Donna standing a short distance away from the truck, where Haley and Joanie are fast asleep under a blanket in the cargo bed.
“Reminds me of when they were little and they could fall asleep anywhere,” says Donna, smiling warmly as she watches over them.
“I feel bad waking them up,” says Cameron. “What if we just left them there for the drive home?” she jokes.
Donna scoffs, though her face is lit up with amusement. “We’re not driving home with our kids in the truck bed,” she says.
A warm feeling blooms in Cameron’s chest. She’s quiet for long enough that Donna looks over at her questioningly. “What?”
“You said 'our kids,’” says Cameron.
Donna looks surprised, then sort of sheepish. “Did I freak you out?” she asks.
But Cameron shakes her head, smiling. “No, you didn’t.”
Donna takes hold of one of Cameron’s jacket sleeves and tugs her over for a kiss, resting her forehead against Cameron’s when she pulls away. “Let’s go home?” she suggests.
Cameron nods. “I’m just gonna grab one more thing,” she says.
She runs back into the Airstream and reaches to pull out her old stuffed toy from where it’s wedged between the bed and the wall, hugging it to her chest.
Let’s go home.