Chapter Text
─ 23 ʙʙʏ
Obi-Wan Kenobi and his Padawan had been discussing their return to Coruscant with Master Yoda and Master Windu when it happened. They all felt a disturbance in the force that shook them to their core. It thickened the air around them like fog and Obi-Wan was sure he could almost taste it on his tongue if he tried — heavy. There was no flash of light or shaking of the ground beneath them. Only a weight on all of their senses.
One moment there were four people in the High Council Chamber, the next there were five.
You appeared in the centre of the room, directly on top of the concentric pattern of the chamber floor. You were still - so still that the men around you could’ve easily mistaken you for dead. There was clearly no weapon on your person, your frame clad only in a short, white silk dress and your hair splayed out around your head like a blanket.
The lack of weapon, however, did not stop Mace Windu and Anakin Skywalker from leaping into a defensive stance, lightsabers quickly unsheathed from sand coloured robes and held up protectively against the mystery woman that now lay before them. The force told them to be wary and they listened.
Obi-Wan and Yoda did not follow suit, and one short look between the two of them shared the thought they both had.
This person meant no harm.
You stirred a little, eyes squeezing shut tight so your face contoured into a frown. It wasn’t a sound or a movement that awoke you. It was a vague feeling, compelling you out of the complete darkness and into the limbo space between unconsciousness and consciousness. You felt as though you were falling - a familiar feeling when drifting off to sleep; tumbling down and down and down until the fuzzy thought of you are going to hit the floor would wake you with a start. Only this felt like it had no end, and it wasn’t fast. It was slow, as though you were not falling through air, but through thick clouds of white. Until finally, the thought; danger.
Your eyes shot open, gasping for air as your hand moved to clutch your chest, where a weight felt indescribably heavy, pressing down onto your lungs.
The first thing you noticed was that the ceiling was definitely not your ceiling. It wasn’t the popcorn bedroom ceiling of your childhood home, covered with glow in the dark stars. It wasn’t the slightly damp hotel room ceiling you were vaguely cognisant of falling asleep in the night prior. It wasn’t like any other ceiling you’d seen in your life. It was vast, walls that seemed to be glass windows framed in heavy dark metal curving inwards to a point more than 30ft above your head. It felt as though it were a cathedral made of metal and glass - minimalistic where cathedrals were gothic, hardy where churches were delicate.
The sky behind it was familiar. Soft blue with creamy clouds, tinged with the gold of the impending sunset. You fixed your eyes on it as you tried to steady your breathing, the clouds moving steadily across the glass windows. It reminded you of childhood. Of sneaking through the hole in the hedge across the road, lying on your back with your friends in the farmer’s fields and watching the clouds form shapes across the sky until the rev of the farmer’s tractor sent you running back to where you had come from.
But then, something else crossed the window. A plane? No. It was too small to be a plane. Too close. Moving beneath the clouds rather than shielded behind them. They were cars? Was there a road up there? It looked like they were following a path, but no surface supported their movements. You frowned up at it.
“Who are you?” Windu demanded after despite being awake, you hadn’t said a word. You jumped at his voice, that feeling of danger coursing through you again.
“What’s your name.” Windu made eye contact with you.
“I-I… Y/N.” You finally choked out, sitting up cautiously. Your hands raised instinctively, palms up. Obi-Wan could see you were shaking with fear, eyes wide like a deer in headlights.
“From this planet, you are not.” Yoda spoke calmly, as if talking to a child who had lost its mother. Your eyes fell on him, widening immediately. The appearance of this… Koala? Mouse? It was unlike anything you had seen before. It was green.
“Wait… planet?” You whispered, then shook Your head in disbelief.
I have to be dreaming, you thought. You squeezed your eyes shut again, and imagined yourself back in the bed you had fallen asleep in. The warm double bed in an old inn in Aberdeen. Freshly laundered sheets. A thick tartan blanket. Rain pattering against the windows. The arms of…
You opened your eyes. You were still sitting on the floor of an unknown room, the wood cold against your skin. And apparently, you were on a different planet.
“Fear not, Jedi.” Yoda held up a three fingered hand at Windu. “The force is strong with this one.”
“Th-The force?” You stuttered out, glancing up at the men whose neon swords were now retracting back into their metal handles. Neither Windu nor Skywalker returned them to the place behind their robes from which they had retrieved the weapons and from that, you knew that you weren't safe yet. Their stance conveyed that you were the one in this situation who was to be mistrusted, not the other way around, no matter how alien all of this felt to you.
“Where… where am I?” You turned back to Yoda, figuring the one that had not drawn a weapon on you was the safest to talk to.
“You are in the High Council Chamber.” Windu answered. “How did you get in here?”
“She just appeared, Windu.” Skywalker said, incredulously. “Out of thin air.”
“I… I need to… go home.” You frowned and held a hand to your forehead, feeling the thrumming of your heart through your skull.
Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Ba-dum.
Obi-Wan could hear it through the force. It was thick around you, like it had felt moments before your arrival. Only now it didn’t span across the expanse of the room, instead congregating around you, like you were a magnet pulling it in.
You felt it too, only you could feel it inside of you. It coursed through you and, what when you landed had felt intrusive; like a burning liquid spreading through you like wildfire, now settled. It flowed through your veins rather than tearing its way through you. It felt like it was making a home beneath your skin.
“What planet are you from?” Windu continued his questioning. Obi-Wan almost wished he’d stop. He was as baffled and as intrigued as Mace Windu was, but he could sense a discomfort in you. One that needed to be left alone. He almost did stop him. But then something flickered in your eyes that made him keep his mouth shut. A strength. It was only because of that strength that he decided not to urge Windu to leave you be.
“Erm… Earth?” You answered, as if it were an obvious answer. From the looks on the men’s faces, you determined it to in fact not be.
“Earth…” Obi-Wan finally spoke. He hadn’t meant to. The name was just so primitive. 40% of the galaxy's planets had earth. What made this one seem so special that they had named themselves after it? He crossed his arm over his chest and raised his other hand to his chin, fingers running through the newly grown beard he had decided after the last two missions with Anakin against shaving. It was a move that made him look distinguished. Anakin joked that facial hair was the mark of an aging Master and Obi-Wan would’ve taken offence had he not thought the very same thing about his own master not all that long ago.
“Galaxy?” Windu asked.
“Erm… I believe the milky way?” You recounted from your basic knowledge of science. It had taken you a minute to remember, the seemingly mundane fact learned over a decade ago buried beneath years of adulthood.
“Far away, that is.” Yoda nodded. “Far, far away.”
“How far?” Anakin asked.
“Intraversibly.” Yoda only said.
“And yet?” Windu pressed.
“I’m sorry, but I… I need to get home.” You stuttered out, climbing to your feet. It was only then that you noticed your attire. Or rather, the lack of it thereof. You weren't sure if it was better that you had been sent here in this one-off piece of clothing you never wore or your usual nightwear; a worn out Pink Floyd t-shirt and a pair of old boxer shorts.
“Oh.” You covered your body, cheeks growing hot with embarrassment.
Obi-Wan stepped forward, unwrapping a tan coloured cloak from his shoulders and draping it over you.
Ever the gentleman, Anakin thought, fighting his cheeks attempt of tugging the corner of his lips upward.
You took the cloak graciously, pulling it over your shoulders and across your chest. It draped over you like a towel would cover a child, falling down to your feet. It was warm and soft and smelled like the clean scent of soap and a spice somewhat similar to cinnamon. You ran the fabric gently through your fingertips, grounding herself in the rough, burlap-like texture.
Obi-Wan began to back away, but as he did he noticed something on the floor beneath where you had appeared. It glistened slightly in the sunlight and he knew that the others attention was too focused on you to notice it, so he bent down quickly and scooped it up, disguising his action as wrapping the cloak around your legs to cover them completely. Once the item had been retrieved, he tucked it cautiously into a pocket beneath his robes.
“Thank you.” You murmured as Obi-Wan backed away.
“Home, you cannot go. Stay here, you must.” Yoda stated firmly. He began walking away, nodding at Windu.
“Come, Windu. Meditate and discuss, we shall. Kenobi, Skywalker – to the Jedi Quarters, you must take her. Her questions, you will answer.” He closed his eyes and you watched for a second with trepidation. You felt an energy grow and swell outside of your body, like a weight in the air you could sense without even trying. You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to rid yourself of this strange sensation
Jedi, you definitely are. You heard Yoda’s voice, clear as day in your mind, and your eyes snapped open. What kind, I do not know. His lips weren’t moving, but his eyes opened, and he smiled your way.
“Interesting being.” He mused out loud, turning to Windu. “Do you feel it, too?”
Windu just hummed. He looked apprehensive and stern. Where you could feel the energy of Yoda, Kenobi and Skywalker with little apparent effort, trying to feel the same from him was harder. It was shielded and unreachable - protected. You sensed a man always on guard, who always considered a position before taking it. A man who acted on logic and facts over feelings and heart.
“Powerful Jedi, she will be.”
They both began walking out of the room and you watched them leave, stunned. The logical side of your brain told you again and again - you are dreaming. But that sensation in your gut, once intangible and imagined, was now weighted and present. It told you what you feared. It told you that logic and reason were damned - this is real.
Kenobi looked down at you with a serious expression carved onto his face. His brow furrowed and his lips betrayed no emotion - a thin line of expressionless silence. It was not serious in a stern way, however. When you turned back to meet his gaze you did not feel chastised or afraid of an impending verbal attack. It was more the look of a student watching a professor's presentation. He looked at you as if you were a lecture on a topic he knew nothing about. Focused, intrigued. It made you shift uncomfortably beneath his cloak, feeling less human and more object.
Skywalker on the other hand had relaxed a little, a small smirk playing at the edges of his lips. This entire situation was so bizarre, so unlike anything he’d ever experienced, that he was enjoying the newness of it all. His gaze, however, made you feel no more comfortable than Kenobi’s. Where Obi-Wan’s look made you feel like an object, Skywalker’s made you feel like a toy.
“Am I… I must be dreaming… no?” You broke the silence almost to remind the men before you that you were a sentient being and not some inanimate thing to be appraised like a vase at an auction.
“No.” Was all Kenobi said. You stared at him waiting for him to elaborate.
“Yoda said you were to answer all my questions.” You pressed, when no development was offered. Then, Kenobi smirked too, moustache twitching upward. He raised an eyebrow at you and the switch from emotionless stare to a mischievous grin caused the breath to hitch in your throat.
“I did. Follow us.” He began walking towards the door Yoda and Windu had walked out of, Skywalker at his heels. You turned to trail after them but as you did, your eyes focused on what was immediately out of the window in front of you, your view finally outward rather than upward.
“Woah…” you whispered, bare feet padding over the floor of the High Council Chamber, until you were so close to the window that if you leaned a little, your nose would press against the glass. You breathed steadily, a small circle of fog from your breath on the glass growing with each exhale.
Obi-Wan and Anakin halted in the door frame, turning to look at you. You looked so enamoured, awed. It made Kenobi falter a little in his thoughts, the innocence of you stunning him a little. You reminded him of how Anakin had been when he had first seen Coruscant and the Jedi temple. Wide-eyed and eager to take it all in quickly.
Anakin Skywalker looked at his Master, intrigued. He tried pushing a message through the force to him, but it faded into nothingness as Kenobi lost himself in his memories. Anakin frowned.
“Where… where is this?” You murmured, raising one hand and placing it against the glass. It was cool to touch but it was a welcome coolness. It relaxed your muscles and grounded you.
The city before you was vast, buildings taller than any you had ever seen in your life. Taller than the high rises you’d seen on the news or magazines in Hong Kong, New York or London. Taller than any of the buildings you had been up yourself. Staring across the city at a cluster of skyscrapers, you were convinced they had to even be taller than Mount Everest.
You noticed more of the plane-cars you had seen above you moments ago. They were following an invisible path, very clearly no road. Some crafts moved outside of these paths, zipping and twisting to avoid the uniform ones before darting out of view. When you looked down, you got more of a sense of how high you were. You could see the top of the building you were in, establishing yourself to be up a tower, but you could not see the ground. It was shadowed by the buildings, fading into a hazy darkness that threatened an unknown depth.
You gulped.
“Coruscant. Galactic City.” Kenobi answered you. “Centre of the Galactic Republic.”
“How very Fritz Lang.” You murmured without thinking. You were reminded of the two shelves of worn out paperbacks in your apartment back home - Sci Fi novels you had flicked through out of interest occasionally but never read. The city before you looked all too much like the cities that decorated those paperback covers.
“Fritz who?” Obi-Wan frowned at his Padawan.
You shook your head and turned to look at them again. The novels had flickered a hope of falsehood surrounding this all again. A dream, crafted from flipping through novels too much. The feeling tugged in your gut again and you tried to ignore it.
Obi-Wan and Anakin held open the door for you, encouraging you to finally follow them out of the Chamber. You took the hint, joining them as they exited the large glass room into what seemed to be an elevator. It was quiet as you walked, only the sound of the two men’s boots tapping softly against the floor, your barefoot steps making no sound at all, and a faint hum of electricity and ventilation. You barely wanted to breathe lest you disturb the silence.
Once inside the elevator, you watched as Kenobi pressed a number into a keypad rather than pressing a floor number button as you were used to. You supposed in a building this high, the numbers of floors wouldn’t fit across that wall. The doors closed slowly and silently.
The speed of it shocked you as it jolted downward suddenly, destabilising your footing. You stumbled, knocking into Kenobi, who reached out to hold you upright.
“You okay?” He sounded concerned.
“Jeez this thing is fast.” You murmured in response, straightening yourself up.
“You never been in an elevator before?” Anakin smiled at you and you frowned, feeling a teasing tone to his voice. “Don’t have them on Earth?”
“We do but they don’t go a million miles an hour and attempt to remove your spleen from your body.” You retorted and Skywalker laughed heartily. You heard Kenobi chuckle softly beside you, trying to conceal it but failing to your astute hearing.
“Your names are Kenobi and Skywalker?” It was a question, not a statement.
“Anakin Skywalker,” Anakin turned his body towards you, holding a hand between you. You took it and he lifted your hands up and down in a familiar handshake. At least some things here were the same. “Pleasure to meet you…”
“Y/N, Y/N Y/L/N.” You responded, name sounding wholly unexciting in comparison to his. But you saw Anakin’s eyes twinkle.
“Wow, I’ve never heard a name like that before.” He mused.
“Obi-Wan.” The voice the other side of you grumbled. You turned to face Kenobi, but his eyes remained fixed on the elevator doors as they opened.
“That’s your name? Obi-Wan Kenobi?”
Obi-Wan didn’t respond, leading you out of the elevator. Anakin walked a little less stiffly beside you. At his companion’s coldness, he nudged you and smirked.
“People around here call him Master Kenobi.” He chuckled. Obi-Wan sighed.
You frowned. “Kinky.”
Anakin roared with laughter.
“I like her.” He teased, and Obi-Wan’s hair shook in front of you as he shook his head.
“Not two of you.” He grumbled.
“What are you a Master of, exactly?” You asked, looking out of the windows lining the hallway you were currently being lead down. You were still high up, but you knew if you peered downwards you could perhaps see the ground now, buildings taller than this floor stretching up above you.
“Obi-Wan is a Jedi Master.” Anakin explained.
“And a Jedi is someone who uses this…” you gestured vaguely at nothing.
“Force?” Anakin finished for you. “You can feel it?”
“Is that what it is…” you murmured. “I… I never felt it like this. So… so… potent? It’s… I’ve felt it I guess but… never noticed it before though. On earth. But now… feeling it like this… I suppose it’s always been there in some way. I’d just… got used to it. It was never this… powerful and… consuming.” You struggled to put words to your feelings.
“You have lived too long without learning to hold it. Do they not have Jedi training on Earth?” Anakin quizzed.
“Ani, she didn’t know what a Jedi was until five seconds ago.” Obi sighed.
Then, you were led into a large corridor. It looked like the Natural History Museum except five times the size. The walkway you were led down was the size of a two lane road and looked out over a vast hall, decorated with pillars and archways the height of seven story buildings.
“This is…” You couldn’t form the words in your head to describe it. You were beginning to think you may have run out of words to describe this place. You attributed a word to something - a pillar or a building - and then something else came along that seemed to better fit that word, erasing its meaning from your brain and making you question everything.
You silently resolved to not comment any more on your surroundings with amazement. You were sure there were many more wonders to come and your incessant awe was bound to be getting on your two companions nerves.
They were leading you outside, to a platform where various different vehicles sat. You noticed some that were familiar, akin to those you had seen whizzing across the sky through the windows of the High Council Chamber. Others were larger, more similar to ships you had seen in sci-fi movies or at the space museum
The two men lead you to a smaller vehicle, four seats. It looked like a bumper car only flatter and hovered above the ground with no wheels or wings. Skywalker hopped over the sides of it, seating himself in the passenger seat, as Kenobi opened a door to the back seat. You hesitated, swallowing as images of you stepping onto the hovering car and it tipping with your weight entered your mind. Obi-Wan must’ve noticed your uncertainty and his arm raised, offering a steadying support for your step. You wrapped your fingers around his forearm, offering a smile of thanks as you moved carefully onto the hovercraft.
Your bare left foot trod cautiously on the metal floor of the vehicle. It was cool, and as you lifted your right foot to join the left, no tipping or lack of balance occurred, the craft almost accounting for the shift in weight as you stepped onto it. It wobbled slightly, but not enough to knock you off balance, and you quickly released your grip on Obi-Wan’s arm with embarrassment, cheeks heating as you sat in the leather back seat.
Obi-Wan rounded the vehicle and, like Anakin, leapt over the sides and planted himself in the driver’s seat.
“Buckle up, princess.” Skywalker teased, and you desperately fumbled around you for a seatbelt. You found it – only an across-the-hips belt like that of an airplane seatbelt – and quickly buckled in.
You hadn’t realised they had been waiting for you to do so, the clicking of your belt triggering the acceleration of the vehicle. It rose up first, vertically like those rides at the amusement park that creep you upwards 100ft only to let you freefall rapidly. As if expecting it to do just that, your left hand found the leather of the seat, nails digging into the fabric as you pursed your lips in anticipation. Only, no drop occurred, instead, the vehicle lurched forward in the air, carefully manoeuvring off the space car park and into the sky.
You let your lips part, a gasp of fresh air filling your lungs. Your grip loosened and you looked outward, not sure where to settle your eyes as you took in the sights around you. It all felt overwhelmingly new. You imagined this is what a baby would feel like, opening its eyes to the world for the first time and being overcome by the sights, smells, sounds, tastes. When your eyes thought they connected with something recognisable, a small bird flying in the air above you, the familiarity was taken from you again, it in actual fact being some unknown creature with pink feathers and four eyes.
You almost wanted to cry like a baby, except your self-control forced your eyes downward, gaze taking in only the corrugated metal that made up the floor of the ship, your toes digging into that metal and your knees covered in the tan cloth of Kenobi’s cloak. It took all you could to keep your eyes down as Obi-Wan whizzed you across this unknown city. You heard sounds and wanted to know what they belonged to. You caught whiffs of a metallic scent, or warm food-like fragrance, and wanted to see if it was what you immediately linked it to in your mind – a petrol station or a food cart. But you reminded yourself it could not be that. Not when what you had thought to be planes were in fact hovering cars. When what you thought to be birds were in fact a species unlike anything you’d ever seen.
The flight was short, only to the other side of the temple where the Jedi Quarters were located. They could’ve walked. Obi-Wan and Anakin both knew that Yoda had probably meant for you to walk, so you could ask questions that they would answer. But both of them had not been in the city for weeks, had not slept in the comfort of their own beds in just as long, and the thought of being in the Jedi quarters, with their familiar sheets and belongings was enough to make them take a shortcut.
Obi-Wan helped you out of the vehicle just as he had helped you into it, with a steadying hand and the patience of a saint.
“The Knights have prepared a room on the twenty-third floor for our guest.” Windu’s voice crackled through a communicator on Obi-Wan’s wrist.
“No fair.” Anakin pouted. He rested a hand on your shoulder and grinned down at you, beginning to lead you off the landing platform you had touched down on and back into the building before you.
You raised an eyebrow at his remark.
“The twenty-third floor has balconies.”
The two men led you down more impressive corridors and hallways, up one more elevator and finally, into a room easily recognisable as a bedroom. It resembled that of a hotel room. Modest and sparsely furnished, with only a bed framed with shelves, a desk and chair, a small armchair and a dresser. There were very few decorations. Nothing on the beige coloured walls and no rug on the dark floor. There was only a minimalist bowl on top of the dresser holding a few pieces of what appeared to be fruit, a lamp beside the bed, and a brown quilt draped across neutral toned bedding.
Just as Anakin had suggested, it also had a balcony. Small, enough to fit perhaps four people on at one time. The view looked towards the city, with the distance between you and it, it now smaller than when you had seen it before.
“They’ve left some clothes.” Obi-Wan announced, gesturing to the bed. Laid on the beige sheets were matching coloured fabrics that blended into the room.
“I believe there’s a bathroom in here.” Obi-Wan opened a door between the desk and dresser, revealing a small sized bathroom that held only a toilet, sink and shower. No bath.
You scooped up the fabrics from the bed, disappearing into the bathroom to change.
The clothing consisted of a pair of beige coloured trousers that cut off just above your ankles, an undershirt the colour of dirt, a robe-like overshirt just a few shades darker than the trousers, and a pair of thick knit socks. The robe draped awkwardly over your body and, after you had shrugged it on, you were frowning at yourself in the mirror above the sink, pushing yourself up on your tiptoes so you could see the top completely.
“Do you need any help?” Anakin’s teasing voice came from the other side of the door.
“I… No.” You shook your head, turning back to the door and opening it. Maybe this is just how things were worn here.
When you opened the door, Anakin frowned.
“Here.” Obi-Wan stepped forward, a thick leather belt in his hands. You took it from him graciously, fastening it around your waist. The top no longer looked nor felt so stupid with the material now cinched against you, looking somewhat similar to the clothes Anakin and Obi-Wan were wearing.
“Now, Yoda said you might have questions.” Obi-Wan gestured to the bed as he pulled the arm chair across the room until it was in front of the bed. “So, go ahead, ask away.”
Anakin pulled the desk chair next to where Obi-Wan had moved the armchair, reaching out and taking a purple fruit from the bowl on thee dresser and biting down into it.
You hesitated, clasping your hands in your lap. Anakin and Obi-Wan looked at you expectantly.
“Okay… erm…” You had so many questions but so little words to form them. It felt as though you were in a sea of unknown and trying to comprehend even a small amount of it all in order to formulate a question felt impossible. So, you settled on the little things.
“What are… what are those glowing things… the swords?” You pointed at the metal at Obi-Wan’s hip, holstered in a belt.
“Ah… A Lightsaber.” Anakin nodded, pulling out his own. The light appeared again, glowing blue and vibrant.
“And they are a weapon?” You asked. He nodded, twisting the Lightsaber in his hand. It whirred with movement, sounding almost like the buzz of electricity in the underground at night. You watched the light move, flickering and bright.
“Does it hurt? To be… to be struck by one?” You cocked your head. Anakin grinned. He stood, moving to a clearer space and then threw the half-eaten piece of purple fruit in the air. With the flick of his wrist, the saber moved, twisting from out at his side to slice upward, perfectly cutting the fruit in half. It fell to the ground, the flesh that had come into contact with the blue light sizzling and bubbling black. You looked on astonished, as Obi-Wan sighed.
“Anakin.” Obi-Wan chastised, like a father would chastise a son.
“Why are they different colours?” You asked. “I mean… yours are blue, Yoda’s was green, Windu purple.”
“Sometimes they represent different things. Sometimes it is dependent on what crystal you have to form your lightsaber with… generally, blue is the colour of Jedi guardian – those that use the force more physically… such as in the form of a lightsaber.” At this, Anakin’s lightsaber returned into its hilt. “Green is the colour of those that explore the mysteries of the force in a more… intangible way… Red is… well… it’s a Sith colour. Usually means the wielder has chosen the dark side.”
“And you guys are… the light side?” You questioned, even though you could already feel they were. They both nodded.
“So this… force. Is it a genetic thing? Or...”
“It’s not necessarily genetic.” Obi-Wan crossed his legs, leaning back in the chair. “Genetics can play a part in it, but sometimes the universe just… gifts people with it.”
“Why?”
“It’s not our place to ask the universe why.” Obi-Wan simply said. You swallowed, almost feeling chastised. Like you had stepped out of line.
“So… how do you know if it’s… if you’re the light side or the dark side?”
“You… you don’t I suppose.” Obi-Wan frowned, unsure how to answer your question.
“Surely the force knows.” You pushed, anxiety creeping up in your chest at the thought of being nothing. Or, even worse, a potential Sith. “I mean… surely it… it has a purpose for me…”
“It’s not about purpose. Your connection to the force is as much about choice as it is fate.” Obi-Wan explained calmly. “You can always choose darkness over light. You can always let the fear win over the hope. In some cases, it can be difficult to find the light when you feel fate is pushing you into shadows, but even the smallest of light illuminates the dark.”
Suddenly, his title of ‘Master’ made a whole lot of sense to you. He was wise. Wiser than you had expected from a man of his apparent age. It rendered you speechless, staring at him in awe. He stared back, eyes fixed on yours. He wasn’t sure why he didn’t break eye contact. Something was pulling him to look straight at you, no faltering or shying away, searching your eyes – your soul – for something.
It felt like minutes but in reality it was only a few seconds. The tension felt heavier, however, and not just for the two of you. Anakin felt it too. It was enough to make him clear his throat.
Your eyes fluttered back to your hands.
“Any more questions?” Obi-Wan’s voice was heavy in your ears. You paused, trying to formulate another of your confusions into words.
“You… you say that there are Jedis and Siths… Is there… Do they fight?”
“The Sith are… there haven’t been many in the last few years” Obi-Wan swallowed, thinking of his old master and the red lightsaber that had struck him down. “But… yes… part of our duty is to protect the galaxy from the Sith.”
A silence fell over the three of you as you tried to figure out another question to ask. Maybe one about the planet? The galaxy? You looked out of your new window to the city stretching out into the distance and lost all the words to form a question again.
“What is your galaxy like?”
“Erm well… I have… I have never been off my planet and… very few people have been off it to be honest. We have been to the moon but… in our solar system, as far as we have been able to deduce, the planets are uninhabitable. Many believe we are the only ones in our galaxy.”
“That’s incredibly unlikely.” Anakin scoffed and you smiled.
“Perhaps.” You mused. “It seems stupid to think of it now. What with… this…” You gestured to the city out of the window. “But… I… I’ve never seen anywhere other than Earth. I have… never seen anything other than humans and… and the animals earth has… When… when you only see that… Only know that… Have zero proof that when you look at the stars at night there is something out there… It’s easy to convince yourself that this planet you’re on is an anomaly. Now I see it isn’t… wasn’t.” You frowned.
Anakin stared at you with child-like awe. Obi-Wan’s eyes were softer. He hadn’t thought that much about the whole situation you were facing. It was another mission to him. A strange occurrence that had morphed into just another task for the Jedi Council. Now, he realised that this was much more than that. You had had everything you had ever known ripped out from under you in seconds and it was replaced with something so far from reality that you had no option but to blindly go along with it.
“What is the population of Earth?” Anakin asked next. Obi-Wan wished he hadn’t. He recognised your need to process in silence.
“7 billion.” You answered and Anakin laughed, glancing at Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan didn’t laugh. He smiled but you could tell it was out of politeness.
“Why that’s… that’s nothing.” Anakin chuckled out. You raised an eyebrow.
“Really? What’s the population of this planet?”
“Over a trillion.” Anakin answered.
“Jeez.” You muttered. “No wonder the buildings are so tall.” You stared out of the window and then stood, walking towards it.
Anakin opened his mouth to ask another question but Obi-Wan silenced him with a short force message.
Let her take it in.
You stopped in front of the door to the balcony, peering out. Below you was a garden, strange coloured trees stretching upwards. Around you, more cars flew by.
It hit you then. You had been somewhat calm about it all. Surprisingly so. Perhaps a part of you had still been convincing yourself it was all a dream. Anakin asking about Earth – about your home – made you realise you were never going back there.
‘Intraversibly.’ Yoda had said when Windu had asked how far Earth was from here. If this… this galaxy with its Jedis and lightsabers and Everest high skyscrapers could not get you back home, whoever or whatever could?
You felt tears sting your eyes. Memories of your friends and family flooded your mind. Faces that in a few years, you’d forget the shape of. No reminders or mementos. Nothing. You arrived with barely any clothes on your back, into a world so unfamiliar and beyond comprehension. You were alone.
The force swelled within your gut, as if reminding you it was there. It seeped outwards again, sliding through your veins now, no longer feeling like hot electricity, but a warm flowing lava. It comforted you somewhat, but it didn’t cure your sadness, and your tears turned to sobs.
Obi-Wan watched as your shoulders began to shake, your head bowed. He waited a few seconds, hoping it would pass, but when it didn’t, he stood and made his way over.
“Come outside.” He spoke gently. You frantically wiped tears from your face, embarrassed and ashamed. Here were these strong Jedis and you were here. Out of place, confused and crying.
Nevertheless, Obi Wan led you outside onto the balcony. It was then that you saw an unobstructed view from the building, outward and vast. You could see the whole city, like the one of the High Council Chamber, only now unrestricted by windows and metal, and a further distance away from it all.
“Wow.” You stammered, through hitches in your breathing from your sobs.
“Are you okay?” Obi-Wan’s voice was the sincerest you had heard it be all day. His eyes had softened, his stance relaxed, and he reached out and gripped your biceps gently, bowing his head slightly so he could meet your eyes.
“I just… I just…” You felt a sob rising in your throat and you bit your tongue in an attempt to quash it. “I’m alone now.” You finally whispered out, turning your head to the sky. It had darkened a little since you had been staring up at soft blue and gold.
Obi-Wan watched. He wasn’t sure of what to say to make you feel better, so he didn’t say anything at all, hoping his presence was enough to comfort you. Eventually, after staring at the sky for so long, you raised your hands to grasp his forearms. Sobs threatened to burst from your chest, tears rolling from your eyes rapidly.
“The… the stars are going to be so different.” You whispered so quietly that Obi-Wan could barely hear you over the thrum of the city around you. The sobs finally broke free from the cage of your chest, loud and pained. You raised your hands to your face in an attempt to shield your tearstained face and muffle the sound of the heartache spilling from your lips. It was no use. The noises you made hurt Obi-Wan, almost as though he had been struck in the chest by an opponent's weapon, and the force stirred inside him, desperately reaching out for you.
This time, he didn’t think, he only listened to it.
He pulled you to his chest in a hug, chin resting on the top of your skull. It surprised you and you inhaled sharply at the suddenness of it, the sound coming out like a choked cry. You felt the force within you reach out for his and when you squeezed your eyes shut, hands balling the fabric of his sand-coloured robes into your fists, you could sense his reaching out too.
“I’m sorry.” Obi-Wan murmured. He was saying it to comfort you but then, a sudden realisation of what he’d done. “I’m sorry.” With this second apology he pulled away, leaving you stunned. You frowned but didn’t question it, sighing and wiping tears from your face.
“I… I should be the one apologising.” You shook your head, turning to face the city again. You walked over, almost to the edge of the veranda. Obi-Wan watched as your hair began to flutter in the wind, now unshielded from the building.
“You have lost a lot so quickly.” Obi-Wan pressed his hands together behind his back, now ignoring the pull of the force and thinking again, willing himself to stay four feet back from you.
“Yes.” Was all you said, and it was only just loud enough to hear.
He let silence fall over you. You weren’t sure whether to keep looking at him or look back out over the city. Obi-Wan swallowed nervously, then stepped forward.
“I have something for you.” He cleared his throat, digging into a pocket of his robe and producing the item he had been holding since you landed at his feet merely an hour ago. You looked down at his hands. Laying on his palm was a cassette player. It was yours, silver metal and clear plastic with WALKMAN printed in bold across the front, headphones still attached.
“My cassette player...” You whispered, reaching out to lay your fingers on the item for a moment, before scooping it up so you were cupping it like a baby animal. The force inside of you buzzed again, rewarding you for what you now realised had been the hope you had been clinging onto despite your sorrow.
“What is it?” Obi-Wan murmured, peering at it in your hand. You smiled, clicking it open to reveal a tape.
“It plays music, it…” You took the tape out, grasping it gently between your forefinger and thumb. The breath was knocked out of you again. It was one of your favourite tapes. Pink Floyd, The Dark Side of the Moon. You ran your finger over the pink sticky paper reading the name of the tape and it’s songs and…
To the love of my life, meet me on the dark side of the moon.
─ Joe xxx
A strangled sob escaped your lips and you crouched down in order to stop yourself from collapsing. It was then that you felt it. That you truly let yourself remember. The night before. The day before. Everything.
It had been your wedding day. Your wedding night. The silk chemise. The weight on your ring finger. The tape.
Joe. Joe. Joe.
His name surged through you like electricity, fast and sharp. It stung and blinded you, tears falling heavily down your cheeks.
You had married the love of your life last night. You slow danced to Pigs on the Wing. You ate vanilla frosted cake. You drank too much expensive red wine. You watched him read Ringworld by Larry Niven in the car to the hotel, the spaceship on the cover so similar to that which you had seen in person moments ago. You kissed him in the hotel bathroom after he’d brushed his teeth, the minty taste of toothpaste still stinging your tongue, You made love under a tartan blanket as the rain pattered against the window. You… you would never see him again.
Obi-Wan didn’t know what to do this time. At first he had ignored his mind and trusted his gut, pulling you close in an attempt at comfort. Now he was all too aware of his thoughts. He had never been good at emotional comfort, even when Ani was a child. He did his best, offering kind words and the occasional arm pat, but it was restrained and always with that nagging thought: connections lead to the fear of losing them. Always a reminder of those that he had lost.
“Y/N.” Was all he could say, hoping that he was conveying some sort of concern. Some sort of comfort.
Your hands grasped at the cassette player, tips of your fingers grazing against the back. Sharp edges dug into your skin and you frowned, turning it over. There, pushed beneath the clip of the Walkman, where you’d fasten it to your belt on your runs or on the bus to work, where you’d fastened it to the seatbelt of the plane to Inverness only hours ago, was a polaroid picture. You slid it out carefully, tucking the Walkman under your arm as you stood again, wiping fat tears from your swollen cheeks.
The polaroid was of you and Joe on your wedding day, your head tilted upwards so he could tilt down and kiss you. You were wearing a gown, lace and silk, and Joe was in a tux. Both of you were smiling into the kiss. Both of you were holding the other close. Beneath it, on the strip of white below the square, the words; Finally. 03/02/1985
“My… my husband.” You whispered, holding the polaroid out for Obi-Wan to take. He took it gingerly, gazing at it in wonder. It was unlike anything he’d ever seen before - the actual physicality of it, shiny thin white plastic with fuzzy colours forming the photo. Photographs as such were a rarity in this galaxy. He had seen bounty posters with faces on. He had seen holograms upon holograms. But a photo like this…
The contents of the photo baffled him too. The dress you were wearing, the tux your husband was wearing. The decorations in the background. The hair…
“We were… We were married yesterday.” You slipped the tape back into the Walkman, trying to collect yourself. Obi-Wan watched you carefully as you straightened your back, took three deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth, and opened your eyes.
“You’re a very strong person.” Obi-Wan commented, handing you back the photograph. You smiled at him, thankful for the compliment. Silence washed over the two of you, although it was far from uncomfortable. You needed the silence to process and, even if the reason Obi-Wan said nothing was because he had nothing to say, he too felt the need for quiet.
“I… I don’t know how I’m staying together.” You looked out over the city again, leaning against the railing. Obi-Wan remained standing, watching.
“I just… this is all so… strange. But… there’s something inside me that feels… at home. I want to cry. I want to scream. It’s all so overwhelming. But…” you trailed off, watching as the now setting sun changed the sky from blue and golds to pinks and oranges in almost an instant. It glistened off buildings, turning glass into candyfloss. If nothing else, at least sunsets were just as beautiful on planets miles away from the one you called home.
“I understand.” Obi-Wan said, even though he was sure he never would truly understand exactly what you were going through right now. What he did understand was the feeling of being at home. He knew you didn’t mean Coruscant. He had seen the way you’d looked at it with awe, yes, but mostly trepidation and fear. No, he knew you meant that feeling inside you he sensed growing stronger as you connected more and more to its origins.
It wasn’t the force, although that was part of it. It was anticipation. It was strength. It was calm.
It was hope.