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Catra’s been in love with Adora since day one and, even if Adora hasn’t noticed it yet, she’s pretty sure the feelings go both ways.
They’ve been each other’s family since forever, pushing the other through when things got tough, making life in the Horde something more than just survival. Even if Adora doesn’t feel quite the same way as Catra, she knows that they’re both all the other’s got and that means something.
So when Adora gets magical powers from some sword she found in the woods, it’s hardly like she was going to leave.
~
They go back home from the battle together and Catra might be more worried than she’s been in her life.
Adora is back to normal now but there had been a moment on the battlefield, where she’d been made of starlight and an entirely different person, when Catra had thought that Adora might actually not pick her. She was wrong, of course, one of the few things Catra can be certain of is that Adora would never leave her, but it makes her worry.
What makes her worry even more is how sad Adora looks as they go home together.
“I’m going to change the Horde.” she whispers into Catra’s hair, “we need to be better.”
Catra doesn’t particularly understand the new compulsion of Adora’s but she doesn’t really care.
“As long as it ends up with the two of us running the place, I’m not complaining.”
~
“What if we left?” Adora asks the day after she gets superpowers.
Catra startles at the question. It’s unthinkable. To leave the Horde is utterly unthinkable but apparently it’s not because Adora just thought about it. And, great, now Catra’s thinking about it too.
“You don’t leave the Horde, Adora.” she reaches out so that she can pull Adora closer because she wants to. “What? Did that super sword scramble your brains or something?”
Adora giggles and pushes Catra away, but only so that she can watch Catra come straight back to her. Catra obliges, faster than Adora had anticipated, and manages to get Adora into a headlock.
“Oh sorry.” she says, giving Adora a noogie, “you’d have to have some brains for that.”
Adora’s giggle turns into a full laugh and she fights back, gradually managing to wrestle her way out of the lock and push Catra onto the floor. She pins her with her knees and they’re close enough that Catra’s getting blonde hair in her mouth and God she can’t believe how beautiful Adora is.
The two of them are so caught up in each other that neither notice Shadow Weaver eavesdropping outside the door.
~
The next morning Shadow Weaver comes to get Adora. It isn’t unexpected, Adora just became some sort of princess, of course people need to talk to her about what that means for her. What is unexpected is that fact that she doesn’t come back for three days.
Catra does her best to remain unbothered by it since trying to appear unbothered is her default behaviour. It doesn’t work that well. She gets irritable and snaps at the others more than usual and she can’t sleep with Adora missing from her bed.
Adora comes back with Shadow Weaver’s hand curled so hard into her shoulder that is has to hurt and it doesn’t make any sense because everyone knows that Adora is Shadow Weaver’s favourite.
The second they’re alone Catra holds her tight and asks “Are you okay?” with a desperation she didn’t know she possessed.
“It’s fine.” Adora says, tired.
She doesn’t mention leaving the Horde again.
~
It turns out that having a princess on your side can turn the tides of a war. Who knew?
Catra has to rethink how stupid the rebellion must be when she figures this out. How many princesses do they have on their side? Four? Five? Something like that. The Horde has one their side now and they’re decimating the opposition.
She tells Adora her thought process and she frowns, then reminds Catra that Force Captain Scorpia is a princess too.
Catra thinks about that and supposes that maybe it’s just Adora. She’s obviously the best Force Captain so maybe she’s just the best at being a princess too.
“Everything you touch turns to gold.” Catra says without meaning to.
It makes Adora turn a bright red and sure, Catra might be a little embarrassed about her words, but that feeling is eclipsed by pride at making Adora look so flustered. She leans in closer and looks up at Adora through her eyelashes. It makes Adora turn even redder and Catra can’t help but laugh at her.
“Shut up.” Adora mumbles. It only makes Catra laugh harder.
It turns into wrestling, because that’s how they normally show affection for each other, and then it turns into a pillow fight. Catra thinks it might be the first time she has heard Adora laugh fully since those three days she spent with Shadow Weaver that she’s refused to talk about and, honestly, how could anyone think about joining the rebellion when this is right here.
~
They take a town called Elberon. It’s not a huge battle but it’s big enough that the soldiers involved feel drunk on victory afterwards. Some cadets raided a distillery so some people actually do get drunk. The good mood is contagious and Catra feels full and giggly in a way that only Adora has managed to bring out of her in the past.
But where is she?
Adora had led the charge, as she always does these days, using the strategy Catra had decided on and maybe some of her happiness comes from the fact that this victory is in part because of her. Since everyone else came to the realisation Catra had years ago about Adora being something more than regular people, Catra had risen with her in status. Adora is amazing at fighting and leading and overall convincing people that they would be willing to die for her. But she’s no tactician, that’s Catra’s job.
And Catra is good at her job.
Adora has always known that. She’s always looked at Catra like she’s the smartest person in the room and it’s always made Catra feel a little like she could fight God.
Catra has never had people other than Adora look at her like she’s worth something. She finds that she likes it. Not as much as when Adora looks at her like that, but it comes close.
Which brings her back to the question, where is Adora?
Catra slinks away from the celebrations, the cold air of the outside world landing like the good kind of punch. She walks through the destruction they’d wrought, feeling stirrings of pride at what her plans had managed to achieve. Eventually she hears a sniff from one of the tents they had set up.
It’s definitely Adora’s sniff.
She approaches, tentative in a way that’s unlike her. Adora is curled up, knees up at her chest and her head in her arms. Her shoulders hitch up intermittently in stifled sobs.
“Hey, Adora.” Catra says, soft.
Adora freezes for a moment, then looks up. She’s in her normal shape, human instead of that something made of blood and magic she turns into when she holds the sword. Her eyes are red rimmed and her face is blotchy and Catra knows Adora’s been sad a lot lately but she isn’t normally like this.
“Guess you’re not in the mood to party?” She sits on the floor next to Adora and wraps her tail around the two of them. A barrier between them and the rest of the world.
“No. Not really.”
The Horde discourages it’s members from even having feelings, let alone talking about them. The unfamiliarity of the ground they’re on makes Catra oddly uncertain so she doesn’t know what do except lean her shoulder into Adora’s.
Apparently it’s the right thing to do.
“One of the other Force Captains killed someone.” Adora whispers.
“So did I.” Catra answers, confused. “So did you. This is a war.”
Adora frowns in the way that means that Catra’s not getting it.
“No it wasn’t like that, it was after the battle. He killed one of the hostages.” She turns so that she’s facing Catra fully and it feels like both of them are searching for answers in the other’s expressions. “He was just bored.”
Catra pauses for a moment. “That’s not right.” she says, and flinches in surprise at the words coming out of her mouth. She doesn’t think she has ever thought that something wasn’t right before “That’s not right.” She repeats, because even if she’s never thought it before, she’s pretty sure she thinks it now.
Adora keeps looking at her, something slightly more heart-breaking than relief on her face.
“No one else seemed to think so.”
They hold each other for a long time after that and don’t say anything else.
~
It’s not like Catra never noticed the Horde was cruel before. She may be a little desensitised to it but a childhood in the clutches of Shadow Weaver and all the things that entails has left her with little doubt that her family is a viscous one.
But now, when she sees the people at her sides execute without reason, dole out hurt without prompting, she thinks about it. That’s what has changed. She notices all the same things as before but since that exchange with Adora in the shadow of a conquered Elberon she has actually been taking the time to think about those things.
But she doesn’t do anything about it. No, that’s Adora.
Catra had kind of thought she had forgotten what she said after the Battle of Thaymoor, about making the Horde better. Maybe she had. Maybe Shadow Weaver made her forget during those infamous three days away. But now the Battle of Elberon has relit the fire of righteousness that has always burned within Adora and Catra thinks that things might actually be different one day.
She’s been talking to the other force captains, persuading them against excessive force. Then once she’s done that she’s been persuading them to hand out punishments to their subordinates when they use excessive force. She’s started to try and veto battle plans with costs, both to the Horde and the Rebellion, that she deems unacceptable.
It makes Catra proud, that Adora’s so powerful that she’s changing their whole world. It still makes her worry though. These days she gets invited to most of the meetings where Adora is doing these things and she can see the way it makes Shadow Weaver grit her teeth.
“Aren’t you worried about what she’ll do to you?” Catra asks when they’re curled up in the same bed. “What if she takes you away again?”
Adora tightens her hold on Catra. “I’m not letting her control me anymore.” she says, which isn’t actually an answer but also it sort of is.
It doesn’t make Catra worry any less.
~
Shadow Weaver gets angrier every day. With the changes. With how people have somehow come to respect Catra. With how Adora is so powerful now that Shadow Weaver’s practically obsolete.
Catra can see it. She knows that Adora can see it too. Both of them try not to talk about it.
They’re in the barracks playing a card game with Lonnie and Kyle and Rogelio. Catra still feels like the outsider of the group but not as much as she used to. The admiration she’s gained since the Horde has started using her strategies to their advantage has given her a security she lacked before. It makes her feel a little less like everyone but Adora is her enemy.
“Chase the ace?” Adora suggests while Lonnie shuffles the deck.
Catra rolls her eyes. “You’re meant to have alcohol for that dumbass” She pokes Adora in the side, partially to help make her point but mainly to get Adora to give her an affronted look.
“The loser could take the chores of whoever gets out first?” Adora says and Catra and Lonnie both make noises of agreement while Rogelio inclines his head. Kyle has been pretty happy going along with what the rest of them have decided on so far so they take the lack of noise from him as an agreement.
Catra runs out of cards first and shoots everyone a smug grin. “Whoever’s got the ace, get ready to be cleaning the air filters on the training deck.”
The whole table groans.
The last two in the game are Adora and Kyle. Adora’s leaning forwards, completely intent on winning. From how scared Kyle looks Catra thinks he might forfeit just so he doesn’t have to deal with how sore Adora will be about it if she loses. Catra stands behind Adora and lies to Kyle about which of her cards are the ace while Lonnie does the same from behind Kyle.
The mood of the room is lighter than it has been in ages and the five of them are laughing together, actually unified in something for once.
Then Shadow Weaver drifts into the room, spine straighter than is normal even for her, and the good mood is drained from the room. The five of them stand to attention immediately. Their salutes are perfect despite how relaxed they’d been a second ago.
“Good evening.” Shadow Weaver starts. Her voice does something to set Catra’s nerves on edge even more than normal. “Adora, come with me.”
Catra realises why Shadow Weaver’s voice is making her feel so nervous.
It might be the tone, it might be the way Shadow Weaver stands, it might be the way she leans towards Adora as if she’s already imagining getter her feelers in her mind, but this is exactly how it felt when Shadow Weaver took Adora away for those three days and Adora was halfway to being a different person afterwards.
Catra and Adora exchange a glance. She’s glad to see that Adora realises it too, that something dangerous is happening here. They move a little closer to each other like they tend to on enemy territory.
Adora doesn’t show any inclination that she’s going to go with Shadow Weaver.
“Well, Force Captain?” Shadow Weaver prompts.
Catra thinks fast, trying to devise a strategy where Adora doesn’t have to go. Where she gets to stay here with Catra where she’s safe and herself. She’s halfway through a plan involving about seven different bluffs and some heavy reliance on Lonnie’s competence (Catra can see the distaste Lonnie looks at Shadow Weaver with so she doesn’t think it will require much persuasion) when Adora decides to say fuck being subtle and pull her sword out of nowhere and transform into a princess.
The room glows for a moment. She fills it with light and an emotion that still scares Catra some days. The brightness makes Shadow Weaver shrink back a bit and Catra can’t help but be grateful for it for once.
“No.” Adora says, her voice echoing with ancient power.
The room stays silent for a moment as every occupant waits for the explosions to start. Adora in her She-Ra form is more powerful than Shadow Weaver. They know it, she knows it, everyone knows it. But is she really willing to go down without a fight?
Shadow Weaver looks around the room. Catra wonders if she’s realising that she’s outnumbered as well as outmatched. “I see.” she hisses.
Catra supposes that there’s not much else to say.
Shadow Weaver leaves the room and the darkness that had descended goes with her. Adora transforms back into her normal self and Catra moves in close to her, realising that she had backed away when Adora had become She-Ra.
“That’s going to come back to bite you.” Lonnie says into the silence.
Adora looks at Catra. She can see the same tiredness in Adora’s face she saw when she returned from Shadow Weaver that first time. “I know.” she says. She sounds exhausted.
She’s right.
~
Taking Dryl isn’t a difficult battle. The defences are scattered, there’s no strategy to their movement. The Horde has been taking so many towns these days that the whole operation is practically routine.
The Princess (this one doesn’t even have powers) has already been taken into custody when Adora and Catra’s squadron is looking over her labs for anything useful under the watchful eye of Shadow Weaver.
“Hey Catra.” Adora calls, “Check this out.”
She’s looking at a small, red crystal. It glows a little in the faint light of the laboratory but aside from that Catra can’t see anything special about it.
Catra presses her side against Adora’s. She’s been getting better about not getting nervous around her She-Ra form lately. “What’s up?”
Adora’s frowning at the crystal. “I’m not sure. This thing is giving me a really weird vibe though. You’re not feeling it?”
“Not really.” Catra answers. Then she thinks about it. “Maybe a little. It kinda reminds me of the Black Garnet.”
Catra regrets the words as soon as they’re out of her mouth. No sooner has she said them than Shadow Weaver has crossed the room to join them in peering at the crystal. Adora shoots Catra a look of annoyance and she shrugs in apology.
“What have we here, soldiers?” she asks. Catra hates how the whisper of Shadow Weaver’s voice still gets under her skin so easily.
“We’re not sure yet.” Adora replies, leaning towards the crystal to get a closer look. Catra’s really starting to understand what Adora meant about the weird vibe and she kind of wants to pull Adora away from it. “It’s probably noth-” She’s cut off as the crystal latches onto the hilt of her sword.
She jolts back like she’s been shocked and starts trying to pull the crystal off the sword as it buries tendrils of something Catra thinks might be magic into the metal. Catra lunges forward to help her but Shadow Weaver freezes her with that red, crackling magic that hurts her so much.
“How interesting.” Shadow Weaver muses. Catra wishes she could sink her claws into her.
Adora lets out a grunt of pain and Catra tries even harder to break the hold on her but to no avail. Out of the corner of her eye she sees the soldiers that had come here with them fleeing the room in fear. After a moment of Adora shaking and hurting and obviously trying very hard to hold something back, red veins start inching their way up her visible skin.
She freezes for a moment, her eyes screwed shut. Then they open and glow the bright red of the crystal fixed to the hilt of her sword.
If Shadow Weaver wasn’t holding her perfectly still Catra knows she would be shaking.
Adora lets out a grunt of rage and runs at Shadow Weaver. Her sword is held firm in her hands and she’s obviously going in for a kill.
“Very interesting.” Shadow Weaver says before using her magic to plant Catra’s frozen form directly in Adora’s path.
Shadow Weaver keeps Catra trapped. Doesn’t even let her fight as her soulmate prepares to gut her. She feels her eyes widen as she prepares to die.
“Adora?” she says softly. As final words she’s certain she could do worse.
Something about the sound, maybe it’s the way Catra’s voice breaks on Adora’s name or her fear, but it makes Adora pause. She hovers for a moment, her sword poised to cut clean through Catra’s neck.
(Catra’s seen her in battle, seen her cut the heads off Rebellion fighters. She’s felt the spray of blood from their necks as she’s stood at Adora’s back. She knows it’s a quick death but for some reason that’s not making her feel much better right now.)
“Adora?” Catra tries again. Shadow Weaver still has a hold of her but she fights it with every bit of willpower she has, every piece of desperation in her soul, until she manages to raise her hand inch by inch to rest against Adora’s cheek.
Adora screws up her face. Even though she remains silent there’s a moment where she seems to be in the most heart-wrenching agony Catra’s ever seen. Her eyes flutter open for a moment and Catra feels a surge of hope when some blue leaks through the red.
Shadow Weaver makes some sort of gesture from behind her and suddenly the crystal has been torn from the sword hilt and rests in the hands of one of her shadow puppets. The red veins start to retreat and Adora collapses, transforming back to her normal self immediately. Catra’s released from Shadow Weaver’s magic just in time to catch Adora before she hits the floor.
Catra keeps Adora’s head in her lap, holding her face in her hands. She’s completely unconscious and Catra takes the opportunity to glare at Shadow Weaver just because she can.
“Fuck you.” she spits.
Shadow Weaver jolts a little at that. Catra’s never dared speak to her with such disrespect before. But then the shadow puppet with the crystal hands it over to her and Shadow Weaver gets distracted with feeling its weight. She looks from the crystal to Adora and Catra on the floor holding the broken pieces of eachother together.
“Very interesting.” she repeats, just to be a bitch.
She glides out of the room with the crystal in her hand and Catra is left with an unconscious Adora.
A tear leeks out from one of Adora’s closed eyes and Catra wipes it away. She wishes that she could do more.
~
Once they get back to the Horde there’s a short reprieve. Adora is obviously shaken from whatever happened in Dryl but she manages to push it down, focus on being a leader. A part of Catra wishes that Adora would talk to her about it, let herself be vulnerable, but the rest of her is too impressed to care.
In the time before the next mission they train like they always do. They still go to the meetings where Shadow Weaver will recommend courses of action viscous enough that even Catra is starting to find them distasteful and Adora still refuses to follow through on any of them.
Shadow Weaver looks different when Adora refuses to how she used to. She’s hiding just as much outrage under her mask of indifference but there’s a humour to it these days. Like even if Adora’s has the upper hand now she knows that she’ll have the last laugh.
It makes Catra nervous. She says as much to Adora when they’re in bed together.
“What else can I do? Leave?” Adora says it as if leaving is incomprehensible. She says it as if she’s never suggested exactly that before.
She says it the same way Catra would say it.
“You wanted to. Once.” Catra tells her, tentative. “Don’t you remember?”
“I-” If it weren’t for how good her vision is Catra wouldn’t be able to see how Adora’s eyes widen with fear in the darkened room. “I don’t-” She doesn’t seem able to continue so Catra rests her hand against the side of her face like she did in Dryl because it’s all she can think to do. Adora sighs and seems to take some solace in it. “I can’t talk about it. I want to talk about it. I think. But I can’t.” She looks at Catra then, eyes wet and burning. “I can’t tell if it’s because it’s me that can’t talk about it, or if it’s just another thing she put in my head.”
Catra shuffles closer so that she and Adora can bury themselves in each other. “It’ll be okay. I’ll make it okay.”
Adora sniffs again. She feels cold against Catra which is odd because she’s always run hot. Catra turns her head so that even if she can’t see Adora’s face fully she can catch the corner of her eye. She’s paler than she should be and her eyes are glazing over. It’s like she isn’t really there. Like she’s already a ghost.
Adora closes her eyes and Catra has to suppress the urge to shake her just so she’ll react. “I can’t feel anything when I try to think back to when she had me.” Some wetness leaks out from between Adora’s closed eyelids. “Everything’s empty.” she whispers.
Catra pulls back fully then, far enough for her to be able to look at Adora’s face. She knows this is an awful time for this, she knows that she should do this when it would be less messy. She knows that everything’s too twisted right now for anything she’s thinking to be a good idea.
She also knows that the world is hell when Adora cries.
“Feel me.” she says, all certainty and something hot that’s been burning for long enough it should have destroyed her by now.
Adora looks at her, confused and hopeful. Then Catra brings their faces together and kisses her.
Adora freezes but Catra knows it’s just because she’s an idiot who forgets that she’s allowed to have emotions sometimes. She’s proven right when Adora comes back to life and returns the kiss fervently enough that it makes Catra dizzy.
By the next morning Adora looks as happy as Catra’s seen her since she picked up the sword. It makes Catra feel vulnerable, completely open to attack. Adora could ask her to rip her heart out and Catra would obey without question. The only thing that makes the feeling wonderful instead of scary is the fact that she knows it goes both ways.
Even if the world is falling apart at least they might be allowed each other.
~
The next battle is when everything goes wrong.
It’s a stupid battle. Not even worth Adora’s time. It’s not even worth Catra’s time.
Those things lead to Catra spending the journey to the town they’re meant to be conquering wondering why the two of them are there at all. While she thinks on it Shadow Weaver smiles at her, because of course she’s there too. It’s a bad smile. The sort you see on someone’s face as they put a sword between your ribs.
All Catra can do is grasp Adora’s hand a little tighter and hope neither of them get broken beyond repair.
They get to the battleground and it’s one of the ones Shadow Weaver had plans for, ones that Adora had squashed in their earliest stages. She had wanted this place wiped off the map. She had deemed it useless enough to them that to destroy it would be worth the message it would send.
She keeps smiling that dangerous sort of smile as they journey. Catra’s grip on Adora’s hand only tightens.
They reach the battlefield. The three of them enter the barracks that had been set up by the forces already there, Adora in the lead with Shadow Weaver and Catra flanking her.
She gets in and lays out the beginnings of a battle plan. When it’s getting too deeply into the minutia of their strategy for Adora to remain the most qualified speaker in the room Catra takes over. Shadow Weaver stays silent, hovering just inside Catra and Adora’s periphery.
Once everyone’s been briefed they wait a couple of hours for equipment to be prepared and for plans to be put into action. Then it’s time to fight.
Catra and Adora stand with the troops. The two of them at the head, Adora ready to lead and Catra ready to be called upon as her right hand. She lifts her sword, shouts her battlecry, and becomes the something different that Catra’s been learning to look at more in wonder than in fear.
She looks different this time. Her hair is in her normal ponytail instead of loose and she’s got trousers instead of the stupid skort she had before. She looks down at herself, obviously surprised at the change in her outfit.
Catra looks at her in awe for a second because, well, the new outfit’s hot. “Holy shit.”
Adora turns to her and raises an eyebrow. “What?” she asks, confident in a way that sends Catra insane. “You like what you-”
She’s cut off by Shadow Weaver slamming a red crystal into the hilt of her sword.
She jolts, every muscle spasming like she’s being electrocuted. Catra feels a deep dread settle in her stomach as she goes to help but before she can even take a step Shadow Weaver’s red magic is crackling around her and she’s frozen in place. She feels the soldiers behind her exchanging looks and just about manages to see a few in the corner of her eye attempt to go to help Adora like she can’t. They don’t make it far, Shadow Weaver holds up a hand in the shape of a fist and they freeze before returning to the uniform line of Horde troops.
Catra wishes she could rage at them but considering how she’s currently twitching in pain from the hold Shadow Weaver has on her she can hardly blame them for being cautious. None of them would have survived the Horde this long without a reasonable sense of self-preservation.
Adora is twitching too, fighting against whatever is making its way into her system. The red veins take longer to spread across her skin, possibly a by-product of her new form, but they still grow enough to take hold. Adora opens eyes that had been screwed up tight and they burn red.
“Tell her that they are her enemy.” Shadow Weaver tells Catra. “She’ll listen to you.”
“No.” Catra grits out. If Adora fights like this she’ll kill the whole town, she’ll massacre them. And after all the work she’s been putting into turning the Horde around, she’ll never forgive herself.
Shadow Weaver seems to read her mind. “Will she forgive herself more easily for murdering her own troops? Will she forgive herself more easily if she hurts you?” She pauses to let the weight of the words sink in and allow Catra to watch Adora scanning for someone to hurt. “This is war Catra.”
There was a time not very long ago that that reminder would’ve been everything Catra needed. The only justification she’d have found necessary. They’re fighting a war and that gives the Horde the right to be ruthless. To be cruel. After all, how else are they going to win?
It doesn’t sound like a good enough reason anymore.
Maybe if the choice Catra was making was purely for Adora to kill or not to kill, then her decision would be a clear one. Choose life. Choose a different way from the one the Horde’s spent so much time brainwashing them to follow.
But this isn’t about choosing life. This is about the fact that Shadow Weaver has had the crystal for a month now and, after it almost killed her last time, there’s no way that she’s using it now without a kill switch in place.
Shadow Weaver must have a way to turn off the crystal, to make Adora herself again. But there’s no chance she’s going to use it before Adora has killed every last person in this town.
“Catra.” Shadow Weaver prompts, loosening her magic enough for Catra to speak but do little else.
Catra feels something inside herself crack and focuses on Adora. She seems to feel the attention and comes back to herself a little. “They’re your enemy.” she says, voice cracking. Kill them, she leaves out. She’s pretty sure that it doesn’t stop anyone from hearing it.
Adora latches onto the order and launches herself across the battlefield.
For the next hour all Catra hears are the screams and shouts for retreat from the enemy. All the Horde soldiers stay completely silent. The only movement is Catra’s occasional flinch from the pain inflicted by Shadow Weaver’s magic as it continues to hold her still.
After far too much time has passed Adora returns, the white of her uniform dyed red with blood. She prepares to attack them, because that’s all she knows how to do right now. Before she can Shadow Weaver snaps her fingers and the crystal falls from the sword, snatched up by one of her shadow puppets before Catra can even think of trying to grab it. It’s only then that Catra’s released.
Adora collapses to her knees, not passing out this time because the universe is a cruel place. The sword clatters to the ground and she stares at her hands.
Catra runs to her and holds her as tight as she can. She feels the blood start to soak through her clothes where they touch.
“What did I do?” Adora whispers under her breath. “What did I do? What did I do?” she repeats like a mantra.
“Nothing.” Catra whispers back. “Absolutely nothing.”
The Horde soldiers stay stood silent in uniform lines behind them, watching the tragedy play out.
~
As soon as they get back to the Horde Adora goes straight to bed.
“She’s needed for the debriefing.” Shadow Weaver frowns. Catra has to restrain herself from attempting to murder her then and there.
She takes a breath before looking at Shadow Weaver through narrowed eyes. “I know you love to ignore the fact that Adora and I both have real power here, but that’s a reality that you’re going to have to face up to about now.” She makes sure her claws catch the light enough for Shadow Weaver to see them glinting. “If you do anything right now to break Adora more than you already have then the both of us will use every inch of power we have to destroy you. And if Adora doesn’t want to then I will find a way to persuade her.”
It’s a bluff, of course. Catra plans to destroy Shadow Weaver no matter what her future actions towards Adora are. She’s already crossed the line.
That doesn’t matter right now though because Shadow Weaver seems to buy it. She hesitates. “Tell Adora that I’m proud of her.” she instructs, as if Catra is going to do anything of the sort.
Catra scoffs and as she heads to the barracks where Adora is she makes a decision.
Shadow Weaver has to die.
~
She gets back and Adora’s asleep, tear stains on her face. The rest of their squadron had given the two of them the barracks to themselves which Catra feels a moment of gratefulness for. By the time Adora has woken up that wave of emotion has died down and there’s only room for one thought in Catra’s head.
“We need to leave.”
Adora looks reluctant but she’s too tired to fight this battle. “I- Catra-”
“We need to leave. They’ll do it again. You won’t survive it.” Catra presses.
“I-” Adora’s eyes fill with tears and she holds Catra a little tighter. “Okay. Okay, we’ll leave.”
~
They plan to go that night. They could wait for another opportunity, a better one, but Catra isn’t willing to risk the Horde using Adora like they had last time. She doesn’t think there’s much chance of Adora coming back from that.
Watching Adora pack, completely expressionless, Catra isn’t actually sure if she’ll come back from this.
They leave the barracks with a backpack full of supplies each. Adora could have carried more if she’d used her She-Ra form but she hadn’t mentioned it and Catra hadn’t asked.
Catra holds up a closed fist to tell Adora to hold as they reach the doors to the bay where they keep the skiffs. Adora’s calling is certainly not stealth and Catra doesn’t want to ask her to hurt anyone right now anyway so it’s down to Catra to take out the guards.
To be fair, it’s not particularly hard.
The two of them fall to the floor, unconscious from the experimental compound they’d just been injected with. Through her strategic work for the Horde Catra has become privy to some interesting projects. It feels poetic for her to use the clearance she’s gained in recent months to hurt the people who gave it to her.
She uses one hand to beckon Adora forwards and the other to input the code to open the bay doors.
They open to reveal Shadow Weaver standing right there.
“Shit.” Catra hisses. She feels Adora tense beside her and reaches out to take her hand. It’s holding the sword so Catra can’t take it properly so she just closes her palm around Adora’s clenched fist.
Shadow Weaver seems amused. “Indeed. I had hoped you would not be foolish enough to attempt escape, but I never put it past you, Catra.”
Seriously, is what Catra wants to scream, you’re seriously taking this as another opportunity to tell me that I’m not enough? When Adora was the one who tried this first, before you took the thoughts out of her head? Seriously?
She doesn’t say that.
Instead, she takes a moment in which she pretends to cower thinking up an escape route. She really is lucky that in all the work she’s done for the Horde recently there’s been so much for her to do in terms of strategy. It means that she comes up with a plan and just in time if she’s reading Shadow Weaver’s impatience right.
She uses the hand she has curled round Adora’s to pry the sword gently from her grip. Adora sends her a questioning look but trusts Catra enough to let go. Catra holds the sword, feels its weight, and starts walking to Shadow Weaver holding it as non-threateningly as you can hold a weapon like that.
“Take it.” she says as she approaches. Shadow Weaver seems to be surprised and Catra smiles internally since if this is her bar then she has a real storm coming. “Take it.” she insists, pushing the sword’s hilt closer to Shadow Weaver. “I don’t care if you have She-Ra or not. You just can’t have Adora.”
It’s another lie. In the time she’s spent watching Adora and examining the Horde’s behaviour she’s come to care quite a bit how much damage they inflict on the planet. It’s not the same as how Adora cares, but it’s enough.
“I already do have Adora.” Shadow Weaver hisses. “I have Adora and I have you. You’re mine. You belong to me. And if that’s something you’ve forgotten then I am more than willing to remind you.”
She reaches out with hands crackling with blood red magic. She’s expecting Catra to shrink back. It’s a response she learned early from being hurt far too often to learn anything else. But she fights the urge.
Instead of backing away Catra twists the sword around fast as lightning so that it’s the blade pointed at Shadow Weaver instead of the hilt.
Then Catra plunges the sword deep into Shadow Weaver’s guts.
Shadow Weaver’s eyes widen and Catra hopes that the last thing she sees is the self-satisfied smirk on Catra’s face at a plan well executed. She falls back then, Catra’s grip on the sword still firm as she pushes it down with Shadow Weaver.
The blood pooling beneath her is black instead of red. It makes Catra wonder for a moment just how deeply the magic of the black garnet is sunk into her.
Catra leans over her as the light fades from Shadow Weaver’s eyes. “You deserve this.” she whispers, just loud enough for everyone in the room to hear.
And then Catra and Adora live in a world where Shadow Weaver’s dead.
Adora comes up from behind Catra and places her hand over the one of Catra’s still clenched hard around the sword like Catra had for her earlier. “Thank you.” she whispers.
“I did it for me as well.”
“Still,” Adora’s tone causes Catra to turn her gaze away from Shadow Weaver’s body so that they can look eachother in the eye. “Thank you.”
The softness around Adora’s face shows just how relieved she is. Catra thinks it’s the frirst time Adora’s really expressed an emotion since Shadow Weaver took She-Ra and twisted her into something evil.
They grab a skiff and start their journey to the Whispering Woods. Shadow Weaver’s body is left behind to be someone else’s problem.
~
They spend a month travelling through the Whispering Woods.
It’s the weirdest month of Catra’s life. It’s also sort of the best.
The woods are difficult to navigate. They’re full of dangerous things that have always seemed to have a particular hatred for Horde soldiers. It’s a good thing that Catra and Adora both have so much experience living in a world full of people trying to destroy eachother. It makes it less of a surprise when plants try to do the same thing.
The skiff only gets them so far before it runs out of fuel. They carry on on foot after that, putting all the survival courses they had endured in the Horde to good use.
“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” Adora says slyly one day.
The Woods have been good for her. She needed room to heal after the Horde had turned her into more of a weapon than she already was. Catra likes to think that she’s helped too.
“Well so are you.” Catra replies. It’s not a good comeback but it’s all she can think of.
“Well, duh. What’s not to like?”
“Well there’s the trees that try to kill us,” Catra starts, putting up a finger for each thing. “the flowers that try to kill us, the insects that try to kill us, the-” Adora cuts Catra off by punching her in the arm. Catra punches her back and it quickly turns into wrestling, like it always does, and eventually Adora is straddling Catra at the waist.
“What about this?” Adora asks, just to be an asshole.
“We had this at the Horde.” Catra replies, trying to control how red her face is getting and doing an awful job of it.
“Not like this.” Adora leans down to kiss Catra’s neck. Then she sits up with a frown on her face. “I-” She hesitates.
“What?” Catra asks, she had really liked the way things had been headed there.
“It’s like-” She gets off of Catra’s hips to lie down next to her and Catra tries not to mourn the loss. “I loved you in the Horde just as much as I do now.” Catra immediately buries her face in Adora’s neck to hide how red she’s getting and is blessed when Adora doesn’t do anything about it but wrap an arm around her. “But it’s like, now that I’m not so busy trying to change people who don’t want to change and fix things that are meant to be unfixable and I’m not so scared all the time. Now I feel like I’ve got a lot more time to spend being in love with you. Is that weird?”
Catra can feel tears in the corners of her eyes but she’s too happy to care. “No. It’s not.” A pause, then, “Are you sure we have to head to Brightmoon?”
Adora laughs. “It was your idea!”
“Well yeah but I hadn’t spent weeks with you all to myself before then!”
Adora just laughs harder before kissing Catra again.
This time they don’t stop.
~
After far too many narrow escapes from being murdered by plants and far too few warm nights Catra and Adora reach Brightmoon.
“It looks pretentious.” Catra says the first time they see it from the treeline.
“It’s pretty!” Adora defends and Catra rolls her eyes despite the fact she’s smiling.
Breaking into the Palace doesn’t look that hard so they decide that they may as well make an entrance. Well, Catra decides that and Adora decides that it’s not worth arguing against. (Catra is convinced that she knows she’ll find it funny too.)
They take an hour to plan and then an hour to gather the resources they’ll need. It’s all the time they need.
Knocking out the guards is easy. Scaling the Palace walls is child’s play. As the two of them make their way up Catra decides that the security on this place is something that’s going to change fast.
Once they get to the top and in through an unpatrolled window Adora grins at Catra.
“Just like old times.” she says and Catra grins back.
They sneak through the Palace to the throne room, confident from what they’ve observed that the Queen should be in there about now. Hopefully Princess Glimmer will be there as well just to lend their entrance that extra bit of drama.
Once they’re outside the doors Catra turns to Adora. “Ready?” she asks.
Adora’s grip on the sword tightens “Ready.” she replies with a confident smirk. “For the honour of Grayskull!”
The two of them burst into the throne room at that point. The reaction is everything Catra had hoped for.
The Queen immediately gets to her feet, her wings flaring outwards to make herself appear larger. Princess Glimmer is already stood next to the throne and summons up handfuls of magic around her fists, Catra decides that she likes them purely because of how little this magic looks like Shadow Weaver’s, while the boy next to her points an arrow at them and pulls the string of his bow taught.
Amidst the chaos Catra somehow manages to make her voice carry over all the other noise.
“We heard that the Rebellion was looking for new recruits!” she calls, smirking “Where do we sign?”
The room goes suddenly quiet, amazed at her boldness, before erupting into noise all over again. The Queen is shouting at the guards and the Princess is shouting at Catra and it’s such a mess that Catra has to laugh even as the guards seize her and Adora.
“You know I could get away?” Adora tells the guard behind her, “Like, super easy. You are not doing a very good job at seizing me.”
Catra laughs even harder and Adora joins her this time. The two of them grin at each other even as the royal family keep yelling and more guards filter in and Brightmoon probably thinks that the Horde is invading or something equally ridiculous.
Catra decides that it’s the perfect start to their new lives.