Chapter Text
Jace had been seeing a lot of Andrew Underhill recently. It wasn’t that Jace was unaware of Andrew before. Of course, he’d known who Andrew was, but recently, they’d been working together a lot more and Jace had gotten to see Andrew in the field for the first time. That’s when Andrew really caught his attention because Andrew surprised Jace. Jace was well-regarded for his rash, and sometimes idiotic, ability to take down demons when everyone else would normally back off, but Andrew? Andrew could do the same thing Jace could. He’d take the demons down but he’d do it without whatever grand, eye-catching maneuver Jace normally threw in along with it.
He was good, and it only took one of Andrew saving him from a demon he’d completely missed for Jace’s attention to be thoroughly captured, not that he showed this. He tried to hide it because he was smooth and because Jace Herondale was not excited to see anyone, beyond his family and beyond Alec.
Still, as Andrew entered the lobby for the late night mission they’d both been put on, Jace couldn’t help but follow him with his eyes and then, look promptly away, down to the preliminary report he was now pretending to look over. “Evening, Andrew,” Jace called casually as he got closer.
...
A part of Andrew had been intimidated when he’d first been assigned on a mission with Jace Herondale. Partly because he was the Inquisitor’s grandson, partly because he was Alec’s parabatai, and overall because he was known for being one of the best (if not the best) fighters in their generation. That said, he knew he wasn’t exactly a slouch himself. He’s a good fighter, if only a little more restrained and a little more likely to listen to direction than lead himself. What he’d heard of Jace hadn’t prepared him to see the man in action though, pulling stunts Andrew was pretty sure would have been impossible for anyone else with only an eye roll from his family in response.
His intimidation, of course, didn’t equate to Jace being any less attractive to him. Sure, he wouldn’t have dared approach the man when he’d first been transferred to New York, but he’s been there long enough now to be comfortable working with Jace, to the point of calling him a friend, even. They work well together and get along on most things, and if Jace were anything but painfully straight, Andrew might have made a move. As it were, they were good as friends and Andrew enjoys the easy rapport between them.
He offers one takeaway cup of coffee to Jace, brewed and mixed to his preference, and glanced at the report Jace was reading. He’d already read through it earlier and had the gist running on a loop in his mind. Coming off of a shift earlier in the day, Andrew’s relieved he wouldn’t have to lead this mission too.
“Anything interesting this time?” He asked, before taking a sip of his own drink.
...
Jace reaches for the coffee, a soft pleased groan coming out of his lips as the report falls forgotten onto the table. He takes a long sip of the drink, his eyes almost rolling into the back of his head in appreciation. "No," Jace announces, once he's managed to rip the coffee away from his mouth. If there was one thing Jace appreciated, it was someone who'd bring him a warm drink. Alec did sometimes. Though most often Jace was left having to steal Alec's and then get yelled at when Alec could have just gotten him one in the first place. Being Head of the Institute didn't mean you were above catering to your parabatai but apparently, Alec disagreed.
"Demon activity downtown. Could get interesting and be a summoning but it's most likely not," Jace shrugs, taking another sip of the coffee Andrew had offered him. "Personally, I hope it's a cult summoning. We haven't had one of those in ages but-" Jace shrugs again, "We'll most likely be back in an hour with hardly even a story to tell."
Jace looks up, finally managing to meet Andrew's eyes. Truthfully, Jace liked Andrew and that was an odd feeling. Jace had healthy appreciation for a lot of people but not enough so that he'd care if they didn't like him. Andrew though? Jace wanted Andrew to like him and that made Jace uncharacteristically nervous, not that he'd ever admit that to anyone of course.
Jace takes another sip of his drink before he abandons it on the table and turns to head towards the full weapons rack in the corner. "Any grand plans when this mission is inevitably boring as hell?" Jace asks over his shoulder as he snatches up a blade off the rack and peers at the edge, as if determining if it's sharp enough or not.
...
Andrew does his best not to even think about hearing the sounds Jace makes when he drinks. Honestly, he isn’t sure if he’s conditioned Jace into making those sounds or Jace has conditioned him into bringing him a drink to be able to hear them. At this point, Andrew doesn’t really care. It just makes him absurdly pleased whenever he hears it.
He picks up the mission brief that Jace was perusing earlier and hums. Yup, that’s exactly what he remembers. The note that they could add another person for the mission catches his eye, but he says nothing of it. It’s unlikely to be anything big enough to warrant a third person with them, especially knowing their skillset, but the thought that it had been an option and Jace had opted not to take it warms Andrew more than their drinks ever could. Andrew smiles when their eyes meet. Missions with Jace tended to be more fun...though maybe he’s a little biased about that.
“Grand? No.” Andrew replies as he heads for the bin to dispose of his cup. “Satisfying? Yes. I have tomorrow off, so I’ll probably head out for a drink or something.”
The implications of or something isn’t lost on anyone who can hear him. It’s not a secret that Andrew’s gay. Or that he’s single. And that he likes to have his own bit of fun when he has the time to enjoy it. He thinks it’s part of why he and Jace get along, really. He straps his thigh holster in, moving mostly on autopilot by then.
When he reaches the weapons rack, he turns to Jace, “Want to join me?”
What were drinks between friends, right? They’ve done that before. Drinking. Together. With Other people. Oh. Oh no. They’ve gone out to drink before, yes, but never just the two of them. Andrew takes two daggers and sheathes them by his stele, mind going a mile a minute over-analyzing the situation.
...
Jace looks up from the blade he'd still been inspecting, his expression confused for a moment and then, questioning, "For a drink?" He asks, his eyes darting down the blade once again. He puts it back, apparently finding something about it not up to his standards. Instead, he opts for a simple dagger, one that he slips into the sheath on his belt.
"I don't know how I feel about going out for a drink covered in ichor but I suppose I've looked worse." Jace grabs the blade he'd discarded last second, carrying it as he heads towards the door. He'd be fine with a dagger but it wasn't as flashy as the blade he'd picked up, which is probably why he'd chosen to take it. "Besides, if I'm with you I don't have anyone to impress do I?" Jace turns back to Andrew with a grin before he's moving out of the Institute into the dark.
He might have overthought going out for a drink if he wasn't so incredibly dense. He liked Andrew. Of course, he'd want to go out for a drink with him. That's what friends did, wasn't it? Not that Jace had many of them beyond his family and his family's romantic partners. He and Magnus were friends but it would be awkward if they weren't. Simon and him were... 'friends' but they had to be at least friendly and eventually, that forced friendliness led to some real friendship. Jace had a lot of friends like that but other people? People he hadn't gotten used to after being forced to be around them?
Jace didn't really have many of those, if any and he certainly didn't count his hook ups. He didn't consider overthinking if going out to get a drink one on one with a friend was really a casual thing because Andrew was pretty much his only friend that he wasn't tied to by association with someone else. If it wasn't casual, Jace wouldn't really know.
"Down here," Jace directs, even though Andrew most likely didn't need the directing.
...
Trust Jace to think nothing of the offer. Andrew grabs a blade, debating bringing one if only so he didn’t have to rely on close close combat. He weighs it in his hand, but knows immediately that he’s leaving it behind for his preferred Bō. It retracts into a slender cylinder similar to his stele, and he holsters it as well.
Andrew snorts, “You mean you can’t get through a mission without getting ichor on you?” Thank the Angel for Jace’s own natural ability to ignore anything that wasn’t explicitly spelled out for him. This was good. This was safe. Besides, if things actually did get messier than Andrew thinks it will, he figures he’d just turn in early for the night. He’d never stick his nose up at more sleep. But...well, now that the offer was on the table, it would be fun to hangout with Jace too.
It wasn’t unusual for him to go out with other friends too, he reminds himself. The fact that he finds Jace attractive shouldn’t affect how he treats the man. It hasn’t with the other times he’s been in the same position, and it hasn’t the other times he and Jace worked together. He’ll blame the momentary gay panic on being caffeinated and already thinking ahead to his day off.
He nods and follows Jace’s lead, though the other man can’t see. Absently, he tugs at the sleeves of his jacket, making sure the knife he had tucked into the left sleeve sat comfortably.
...
Jace scoffs softly, though the sound is playful and light, like Jace's tone often is. He glances back to Andrew, stilling for a moment to let the other man catch up. "Is it really a successful mission if you don't get covered in ichor?" He questions, his tone making it glaringly obvious what his answer to that question is.
With Andrew at his side, Jace starts walking again, this time letting Andrew keep pace with him instead of rushing in his haste to go find the demons they're after. "You can be so careful but where's the fun in that?" He continues. "If you're not covered in ichor and sweat by the end of it, you're not doing it right."
Jace looks over to Andrew, cracking a soft playful smile. "You should loosen up, Underhill. Sometimes it's nice to get a little dirty," Jace winks playfully, his naturally flirtatious nature coming out in full force. He speaks again before letting them both stew in that moment. "I think it was back here," he murmurs, pointing to a street that appears much darker than the one they're on. "Maybe, we'll get lucky and it will jump right out and let us impale it." Jace seems to think for a moment before he continues, "Maybe, we'll get lucky and it won't."
...
Andrew rolls his eyes. He loved the thrill of the hunt and the fight as every shadowhunter did, but ichor was a hassle to get out of clothes in general, and he was nothing but practical.
“There are more fun things to be covered in, Herondale,” he quips, grinning. The air around them is beginning to feel heavy in a way that Andrew has always associated with them nearing their target. He goes down the direction Jace points, and rolls his shoulders and lifts a side of his shirt to activate his swift and sure-striking runes. It’s probably overkill, he thinks, but he’s keyed up enough to want to get into a fight with enough forethought to want to have some excess energy for after the hunt. Drinks with Jace or not, he is looking forward to relaxing tonight.
“And careful doesn’t mean less fun just like dirty doesn’t mean more fun.” His eyes crinkle as he snarks, “Maybe we’ll get lucky and I find it first so you won’t have to do anything but sit and look pretty.”
He chuckles and walks away from Jace, imitating the cocky swagger Jace usually carries when he walks as he headed for the darkest alley on the street. Andrew pulls out the handle of his Bō but doesn’t activate it yet, opting instead to twirl it between his fingers.
...
"Oh yeah, I bet you'd like that," Jace insists, faking insult. He eyes Andrew as he activates his runes, taking in the skin he'd inadvertently shown off. There was nothing wrong with looking, was there? Shadowhunters saw each other shirtless and otherwise quite a bit and if Jace looked, Andrew would probably think it was only his runes that had caught Jace's attention. Truthfully, Jace wasn't even sure what it was that caught his attention, only that it had been caught.
Jace forces his eyes away and looks down the alleyway as he moves to follow Andrew before rolling his eyes at what he assumes is supposed to be a mockery of him. He considers activating his own runes for a moment but ultimately decides against it, Andrew's remark about finding the demon first urging him forward, not wanting to get left behind. "You could tell everyone how you saved me again while I did nothing," Jace remarks. "You keep pulling shit like that, you might just ruin my reputation for good."
He follows Andrew for another moment, letting them both lapse into silence as he listens for the first time for what they came for. Hearing nothing and unable to stop himself from talking, Jace opens his mouth again, "Maybe, one of us should-" Whatever plan Jace had been about to suggest is lost when he falls silent as the demon, a small common one, most likely what set the sensor off, darts out from the end of the alleyway, probably lured in by Jace's inability to shut up.
Jace moves forward even though there's no real call for urgency. It's a simple demon and with no other way for it to go, they could have stayed still and waited for it to come forward before taking it down. Jace doesn't wait. He runs at it, raising the weapon he hadn't even bothered to activate before now. He murmurs the blade's name just before he's stabbing it down, through the demon's insect-like head. Jace rips the blade back out before the demon can disappear, splattering ichor across his chest and one of his cheeks.
"Don't worry," Jace coos as he looks up towards Andrew. "I got it," he says, winking again. In his own effort to gloat, he completely misses that another demon has appeared behind him, speeding towards it's dying partner and Jace.
...
Andrew is sure Jace must have some special demon-attracting thing about him--probably his big mouth--because the ease with which they locate demons whenever he’s on a team with the man. The fact that they find their little intruder with such ease tonight only solidifies his theory, really. He stands ready to act however Jace might direct, only to find his body moving before he could even fully process it.
Grateful for sure-striking , Andrew barely even thinks when he pulls out a dagger, throws, and hits his mark. Swift helps him reach the demon. He straddles the squirming thing and grips the hilt of the dagger, twists, then tugs, effectively decapitating it. Ichor drips from the body and to the filthy concrete, and when he stands back in attention, he flicks the ichor away from himself.
“You were saying?” He rolls his eyes, though he does look Jace over to make sure his partner’s actually still in one piece. The ichor that’s found its way splattered on Jace makes him look as deadly as he actually is, especially under the dim lights and the cover of night. Andrew forces himself to look away, knowing if he let himself look his fill, he’d probably never stop.
Jace has always been handsome. The man himself knew it, and of course, so did Andrew. But there was something to be said about Jace being absolutely in his element that calls to Andrew in such a striking and primal way.
He looks around, wondering if there were more demons. Briefly he considers what other runes he could use, but ultimately settles on not activating more. He drags his dagger across his thigh to get rid of most of the ichor before holstering it. It’s just as he’s pulled out and activated his Bō that two more of the demons appear. “Heads up!”
His staff glows with adamas, and it gives enough light that he finds the right spot to hit to immobilize his chosen target. The Bō’s tapered edges make it easy to pierce the demon’s body, and with a clenched jaw, Andrew steps on the demon’s head then roughly pulls his staff in the opposite direction, effectively cutting the demon in half. Most of the ichor drips down, though there is a bit of splatter on him as well.
Andrew uses the collar of his shirt to wipe away what little ichor reached his neck and face as he stepped away from the now dead demon.
...
Jace watches Andrew take down the first demon with a slow sense of dread spreading in his stomach. He wasn't jealous. First of all, Jace didn't get jealous and second of all, he was well aware that Andrew was good at what he did. He liked that about Andrew. He admired it even, in the same way that he admired Alec's skill. Besides, they were both shadowhunters. Of course, they were both good at fighting but... well, maybe a bit of Jace's smug act hadn't quite been an act. He'd been trying to show off. He'd been trying to impress Andrew the way he seemed to effortlessly impress Jace but every time, somehow, Andrew ended up saving him instead.
Jace Herondale didn't get saved. He didn't need saving. Except from some lower level common demon he'd failed to notice because he'd been trying to impress a boy, apparently. "I would have gotten it if I wasn't so distracted," Jace insists, wishing he had something smoother to say as he said it. Jace didn't get embarrassed easily but he was now. It just shouldn't be so hard to impress someone. All Jace did was impress people, except when it came to Andrew. When it came to Andrew, Jace always managed to slip up and why did he even want to impress Andrew anyway? Jace wasn't sure.
He looks up at Andrew's cue, watching him kill the second demon because of course, he killed the second one so effortlessly. Jace moves towards the last, though there's something frustrated in his stance that's rather unlike him. As he gets closer to it, he finally darts after it and appears much more like himself as he slashed down, cutting the demon clean through in a move that sends ichor splattering across the dirty brick wall to his side.
With the demon dead, Jace takes a deep breath before he turns towards Andrew, finally forcing a grin that doesn't quite meet his eyes. His hands are still tense around his weapon, through there doesn't seem to be a reason for it anymore. "You get so lucky," Jace chides half playfully. He finally takes a moment to wipe the ichor from his cheek, not that he seemed exceptionally bothered by it.
Jace looks back again to see if more demons are coming but they seem to have gotten them all. "We should scope the area out just in case but that was probably it," Jace says finally, as he turns back towards Andrew - the grin on his face now gone, showing some true frustration that Jace is probably entirely unaware he's showing.
...
Andrew twirls his staff, extra adrenaline pushing him to keep moving. Okay, maybe activating those runes wasn’t the best idea, but then again, it’s proven useful, so Andrew lets the thought slide. His eyes eventually land back on Jace after a cursory look around, and he takes in the tension that lines both their bodies.
He grits his teeth when Jace makes a quick motion to clean his face, unable to help himself from giving Jace a once over. The heat that curls in his gut makes him stop fiddling with his Bō and clench his fist. They’re on a mission, he reminds himself. Jace is a friend, he continues. Such an inconspicuous gesture really shouldn’t have had such an effect on him. Well, he knew how to solve that , but if Jace and he are still on for later, well, he couldn’t exactly bring Jace to his usual haunts for a hookup.
There’s a different kind of tension in the air, now that Andrew’s pulling himself from the brief bluescreen that was his lower brain taking over for a quick second. He frowns as he studies Jace. There’s definitely something off, and Andrew thinks back to the past few minutes and wonders if there’s anything he’s done to have brought this on. Maybe it’s just the disappointment that the hunt was over?
A few steps and they’re side-by-side.
“Don’t be too disappointed now,” Andrew jokes, elbowing Jace. “You still got to get down and dirty, after all.”
...
Jace looks down to Andrew’s elbow, frowning before he seems to realize he’s not supposed to be. Finally, he cracks a soft smile. “Yeah, I guess I did, huh?” He says, looking down to his lightly ichor splattered shirt. Jace shakes his blade off before shoving it through his belt to let it hang dirty at his side.
“We can go check down here,” Jace says, inclining his head towards the turn the demons had come from. Jace starts walking silently, the usual excitement in his steps seeming to be missing. He could just be tired from the mission and Jace reminds himself of that as he walks, knowing that Andrew would probably think that and nothing else. He was tired. It was late. He’d woken up at noon sure but... he could pretend he was tired.
With anyone else he probably would have but for some reason around Andrew, Jace felt his tongue loosen in a way that it only did around people like Alec, people he felt inclined to tell everything to. “You just always seem to have to jump in when I miss something,” Jace says as they duck around the corner, his naturally boisterous tone missing like the enthusiasm in his step. Jace was one that showed his emotions in his stance, whether he knew it or not and right now, Jace knew it so he knew that it was bad. It was just that around Andrew, Jace had a hard time putting up that front that he normally did with strangers or acquaintances. It was easy to be honest with Andrew and that was odd. Maybe, it was just that Jace knew Andrew wasn’t an asshole like a lot of their peers were. Maybe, it was something else entirely.
“I try to impress you and it just never seems to work out. You always end up saving my ass and that’s not very impressive at all, is it?” Jace smiles like he’s joking as he glances over to Andrew but it’s obvious he’s not.
Before Andrew can respond, Jace is looking back to scan the area. “Nothing,” he verifies even though Andrew can see just as well as he can. Truthfully, he was just trying to find something to say that had nothing to do with the pathetic truth he’d just rambled out. Who cared if Jace didn’t impress someone? They were working. They were on a mission. They were both very well trained Shadowhunters. It didn’t matter but to Jace, it kind of did and he hated that.
...
Andrew follows Jace, confused. He doesn’t quite understand what’s happening. He looks around the same way Jace does, even takes a few steps away to make sure they have everything covered. When he’s reasonably sure there is nothing else, he deactivates his staff and holsters it. He turns to his partner, ready with a quip about heading for a drink, only to be caught off guard with Jace’s admission.
Oh . Andrew blinks, feeling as if he’s gotten the proverbial rug pulled from beneath his feet. What?
“Impress me?” Andrew says incredulously. “You’re Jace Wayland!” He continues, then winces the moment it leaves his mouth. First, everyone knows Jace is a Herondale now. Second, he hated others for putting any of the shadowhunters that had led the fight against Valentine on a pedestal -- even when he himself had been one of those that did. Third, he knows Jace. He’s more than his name. Or his abilities. Before he could let his idiocy take root, he continues:
“I mean this in the best possible way, Jace,” the use of his first name flusters Andrew more than he cares to admit. They’ve always been Underhill and Herondale to each other. The only time Andrew uses Jace’s first name is when he’s talking about him to Alec, which usually means Alec ranting about his parabatai or scheduling matters. “But you’re a fucking idiot. I saved your ass because that’s what we do. We’re shadowhunters, Jace. We trained our whole lives to do these things, so when you jump, of course I’ve got your back. Besides, it’s not as if you- I mean, what ? Jace, you can’t impress me because I’ve admired you long before I even knew you. You were this great warrior. You helped defeat Valentine. And then I actually met you.”
Unwilling to let Jace cut in, Andrew puts a hand on Jace’s shoulder, “I thought I’d be dealing with an entitled asshole ready to have everything handed to him. Instead, I meet one of the flashiest, loudest, and most reckless shadowhunters I know, and for all that you give me and Alec a heart attack with the stunts you pull, I’m also deeply humbled that you feel free enough to do that and trust me to have your back.” He squeezes Jace’s shoulder. “So no, man, you can’t impress me, because I’m already constantly amazed by the things that you manage to do.”
Andrew lets out a small huff and a smirk, eyeing Jace, “Even making a mess of yourself when I come out with barely anything on me.” His eyes linger on Jace’s chest for a second, mind honing in on the way Jace’s shirt stretched across his chest. The slow drag of his gaze back up is filled with heat, though he tries and fails to stem it. He should take his hand away, he thinks. Jace might be uncomfortable. And yet, Andrew’s hand stays, the point of contact reminding him that the moment is real, that Jace has just told him that he had been trying to impress Andrew, of all people.
...
Jace watches Andrew as he speaks, a slow deeply uncharacteristic blush blooming across his cheeks. He looks away sharply as Andrew finishes, staying silent for a long, drawn out moment. Maybe, he didn't know what to say. Maybe, he was just trying not to say something stupid. Finally, he manages to look over again, his eyes taking in Andrew's hand on his arm with a neutral, if not subtly pleased expression. He opens his mouth just barely and then closes it, seeming to think for a moment before he opens his mouth again, "Well, it's good to know I'm not entirely disappointing as a partner," Jace murmurs, the word partner sounding almost intentionally vague. He was just talking about their job. He was talking about being partnered on the mission together but.... he could also be talking about something entirely different.
"You're not that disappointing either," Jace informs him as he looks over and smiles, finally looking much more like himself. That spark is back in his eyes as he scans the area one more time before seeming to decide they're officially in the clear and free to leave. "Are we getting a drink?" Jace asks, seeming to shake off the entire conversation they just had. It was as if nothing had happened at all and even Andrew's hand still resting on Jace's skin doesn't seem to bother him. Now, much like before, he seems blissfully ignorant as to what a simple lingering touch like that might mean.
"Maybe, if you put a couple of drinks in me you'll get the pleasure of seeing me embarrass myself for the second time tonight." He doesn't indicate if he's referring to the demon he missed or the conversation they just had. Knowing him, he's probably talking about both. "Alec says I have an uncanny ability to embarrass myself when drunk," he informs Andrew, sounding a little proud of that fact.
...
The extended silence has him almost pulling back, but then Jace speaks and he’s put more at ease. Now that he sees Jace seemingly uncaring of it, he lets it linger. The quick look Jace sends his hand and the smile after that makes Andrew’s own expression tighten a little. This is nothing , he reminds himself. They were friends. Friends hang out all the time. Who cares if they were usually with a bigger group and this is the first time they’re going out that’s just them?
Andrew lets his hand slide from Jace’s shoulder to the other side so that he has his arm across Jace’s shoulders as he falls into step beside him. It’s a friendly enough gesture. Andrew does it with friends, but usually when they were joking around. And this… well, the conversation with Jace had felt intimate. Charged . He wonders what had really brought it on, or if it was simply the insecurities of being someone like Jace, who has always had to live up to certain expectations, no matter what his last name had been. It warmed him to think that his opinion mattered so much to Jace, and even though he says nothing about it, knowing Jace likes him well enough as a partner is pretty great too.
He keeps his arm loose around Jace, but doesn’t let go even as he shrugs, “Maybe if you get a drink in me, it’d be me embarrassing myself.” The statement is light enough to convey that there is definitely a story there, and Andrew tries not to think of all the shit he’s pulled simply because he was intoxicated, and tries to focus instead on the thought of Jace loose-lipped and maybe a little more relaxed, only to realize that it wasn’t the best idea either. “I’m sure Alec has plenty of stories to tell.”
Just a few drinks, Andrew. Surely, he could last at least one drink with Jace and not do anything stupid like tell him he might be more than just a little attracted to the guy. No, he was not going to use the word “crush”. It was more than that. He hadn’t been lying when he said Jace had surprised him for being different than Andrew had expected.
Andrew pulls away from Jace when they reach one of the more inconspicuous bars in the city. It caters mostly to people of the shadow world, which means its used to seeing a diverse enough clientele that shadowhunters aren’t uncommon. It’s also the same place he usually goes to with other shadowhunters, so Jace is probably familiar enough with it as well.
...
Jace might have over thought Andrew’s arm around him, had he been anyone else, had he not been so exceptionally relieved to be moving past the conversation they just had - relieved and yet, happy it had happened. With anyone else, Jace might consider what the touch meant. He might consider why Andrew wanted to touch him and if he was trying to say something. Jace was more than used to people hitting on him but... this was Andrew! They were coworkers first of all and second of all, Andrew was a guy. It was well known that Jace wasn’t gay. It had to be a friendly touch and Jace, who had never really been able to touch anyone affectionately as a kid, thrived under that kind of attention - even as platonic as he assumed it was.
Jace touched Alec all the time. True, Alec shared part of his soul with Jace, so it might be a little different but that was platonic and that was normal between them. Andrew just had to like touching with his friends. Jace had never really hung out with Andrew one on one to know but that had to be it and Jace simply did not think about it longer than a fleeting moment of wonder that he brushed off almost instantly.
“Oh, Alec does,” Jace says finally. “-but he likes to pretend I don’t have stories about him in return and I do. Alec isn’t a big drinker but that doesn’t mean I don’t have any stories about him. One time when we were kids, we snuck out to try to go after this demon we shouldn’t have gone after.” Jace looks over to Andrew as they walk, waving one of his hands vaguely. “Alec got thrown into a river when it charged at us. I managed to jump away but we didn’t kill it.” Jace sighs dramatically, “And now he acts like all our horrible ideas have been mine.”
When they reach the bar and Andrew’s hand slips away, Jace finds himself missing the warmth, not that he’d say that out loud ever. Liking touch was fine but asking for it, especially from a friend, was out of the question.
Jace takes the initiative and leads them both over to the bar. He waves to the bartender and when she finally comes over, Jace orders a simple beer.
...
Andrew takes Jace’s story with more than just a grain of salt. He’s always been known to exaggerate, but then what warrior wasn’t? He drums his fingers on the bar, getting a beer for himself as well. Out of habit, he looks around the place. It wasn’t as full as it would have been if they had come on a Friday night, but there were enough people there to have at least two people turn his and Jace’s way. More than a few appreciative and curious glances linger on Jace, and Andrew couldn’t help the possessiveness that briefly flickers within him.
“I’m sure Alec has more on you than you on him,” Andrew laughs with a quick tap of his fingers on his thigh.
He sits on the bar stool, resting an arm on the counter as he fiddles with the beer before taking a swig. His entire body is angled towards Jace. Anyone who looked would know they were there together. Of course, it would be easy enough to assume they were as two friends just hanging out--which, they were--but Andrew doesn’t think Jace would leave him for a one night stand even if it presented itself.
Andrew keeps the mouth of the lip of the bottle against his lower lip, “So what would Jace Herondale have been doing if he wasn’t stuck hanging out with little old me?” He licks his lips as he sets the bottle down. “Hope I’m not ruining date night or something.”
As far as Andrew knows, Jace isn’t actually seeing anyone. Clary and he had broken up long ago and were still civil, from what limited interaction he’s seen of them in the Institute. It didn’t mean Jace couldn’t be in a relationship with other people though. But then again it was so rare for secrets to be kept among shadowhunters. Especially about someone as high profile as Jace. The thought of Jace being with anyone sits uncomfortably with him, but he swallows down the thought with more beer.
...
Jace knew people were looking at him as they walked in but he also knew that people were looking at Andrew too. Andrew was a handsome man and that fact was objectively true. It didn't mean anything about Jace that he'd noticed. It was just a fact. People looked at them both as they walked in because they were a handsome couple - not that they were a couple but a couple of guys together in this bar, as friends. A couple of handsome guys.
Jace cringed finding himself embarrassed at his own thoughts. He was pitifully happy that he wasn't speaking any of this out loud because he didn't even want to know what Andrew would think of what was happening in his head right now. Jace didn't even want to think about what any of it meant. Nothing, he thought viciously. Thoughts were just thoughts. They didn't all have to mean something.
Jace shuts himself up by taking a long hasty sip of his beer and trying to remember the last thing Andrew had said when he broke out of his thoughts and realized it was his turn to be speaking. "I've never been a date night kind of guy," Jace responds simply. "Certainly not anymore," he continues, almost definitely referring to Clary. He falls silent before he can continue with that topic, turning to Andrew at last, "What about you?" He asks casually. "Are you a date night kind of guy?" He continues.
Truthfully, Jace didn't know if Andrew was seeing anyone. He hadn't mentioned anyone but maybe, they weren't close enough for Andrew to mention it. They were out as friends and beyond that, they were coworkers. Andrew certainly didn't have to disclose personal details about his relationship and Jace found himself hoping Andrew would keep it to himself if he was seeing anyone.
The thought of Andrew seeing anyone left a bitter taste in Jace's mouth but he wasn't quite sure why. Maybe, he was just jealous because he was single but Jace knew that wasn't it. He took another sip of his beer and tried not to think about it any more.
...
Andrew can feel the warmth begin to color his cheeks. He wants to say no, that he isn’t a date night kind of guy, too, but Andrew knew better. The thought of having a set schedule to spend time with his significant other? That sounds wonderful. It’s one of the things he envies Alec for, if he let himself go down that train of thought. As it is, there’s no one he’s seen beyond one or two nights of fun, but it suddenly felt inappropriate to tell Jace that. Was it? Friends talk about these things. But how do you explain that the last relationship you had was about a year ago with some mundane that lasted about three months before it devolved into nothing because Andrew had gotten busy with shadowhunter work and couldn’t tell his partner more than it’s work every time he had to leave or cancel a date because of a mission?
“Maybe,” Andrew says instead, shrugging. A playful smile curls his lip as he takes a few more sips. He leans in a little closer to Jace, grin wide and expression open. “Wanna find out?” And it’s absolutely ridiculous. The reply doesn’t even make sense. Wanna find out -- as in let’s go on a date? Wanna find out -- as in help me get a date? Wanna find out -- as in this can be date night? Honestly, Andrew’s a disaster. He knows he’s usually better at flirting, but Jace throws him off because… well… he’s a stupid boy with a stupid crush and fails at being a functioning social human when left alone with said boy, apparently. Well, not always, but the fading high from the hunt and the alcohol probably isn’t going to help his case.
...
Jace's entire expression falters for a moment as he takes in Andrew's words. He doesn't look upset or even happy but for a brief moment, he blinks, looking nothing but shocked. Finally, his expression does a couple of different things. He looks confused. Then, he looks entirely blank, as if he's forced up a wall he so rarely puts up around Andrew and probably hasn't put up since they moved on from that awkward acquaintance stage into whatever this would be called.
Jace wasn't even sure why he reacted that way, other than the fact that he was caught off guard and confused, two things that in his brain signaled danger. Wanna find out? But find out what? Jace could rationalize it a million different ways. Andrew was kidding. He was joking. They were friends at a bar and he was making a joke but Jace knew that wasn't the case. He was smarter than that and he knew by now when someone was flirting with him but that wasn't why Jace froze. That wasn't why he felt panic rising at the back of his throat at the question.
Wanna find out? Yes. Jace did. He'd been avoiding it. He'd been trying to brush it off and rationalize it any way he could but Andrew was flirting with him and Jace... Jace did want to find out. He'd wanted to impress Andrew from the day they'd met. He'd wanted to catch his attention anyway he could and Jace wasn't used to trying to do that. He wanted Andrew to focus on him, smile at him, touch him.
Andrew was gay. There's was nothing wrong with Andrew flirting with Jace and Jace didn't mind that he was gay. Of course, he didn't but Jace... He wasn't. He'd never looked at a man besides Andrew twice in his life and he'd been hit on by so many men. He'd had so many chances to just try it but he'd never been interested until...
Until now and what the fuck did that mean? Jace grabs the glass in front of him, his eyes refusing to go anywhere in Andrew's direction. For a moment, he looks like he’s going to down the glass but at the last second, he pushes it away. "I should go," he forces out, his words blank and guarded in a way they have not been with Andrew in a long time. "I assume you'll find your way back?" Jace asks, his eyes flickering over to Andrew for a second before darting away again. It looked like an attempt to be casual and undermine what was happening, as if this was all normal but it only amplified how not normal this was, not between them anyway.
Jace pulls himself out of his chair before Andrew can respond, his skin tingling and uncomfortable, forcing him up. Jace needed to leave. He knew it. He felt that urge he'd felt as a child, the one he struggled to force down in adulthood, to go run until he found himself in trouble he did not want to get into tonight. "I should..." Jace looks over to Andrew, finding his eyes in a way that almost seems accidental, though once it's happened Jace doesn't look away. His eyes are wide and slightly panicked. "-go," Jace finishes weakly.
...
Andrew can’t help the face he makes as he sees Jace effectively shut down before his eyes. He really shouldn’t have been surprised. Just because Jace didn’t mind having a gay parabatai, didn’t mean he was alright with everyone else -- though even that sits uncomfortably in his mind. No, it isn’t that Jace isn’t accepting. They’ve interacted plenty of times before and Jace has always been pleasant, and it isn’t as if it were a secret that Andrew’s gay. He is and that doesn’t really factor in anywhere else unless he was interested in a person. And even then, he so rarely made a move on a shadowhunter, knowing just how deeply the bigotry ran.
That’s why he really should have just kept his mouth shut. Andrew laments once again that he can be a bit of a disaster when feelings are involved, without even adding alcohol or post-hunt adrenaline to the mix.
He makes a conscious effort to keep his smile loose, even though his jaw tightens. His thumb runs down the condensation of his glass absentmindedly, grounding him. It helps him make the decision to not let the instinctive want to let Jace go, win. With a small shift in his weight, he introduces more space between them, body now more open to the rest of the space and his side to Jace. It should help Jace feel less crowded, he hopes. He was actually beginning to feel restricted himself, so Andrew takes off his jacket to introduce more circulation in his system. The urge to up and leave or to lash out is strong, but he bites his tongue and makes sure not to come across as antagonistic.
There’s nothing wrong with Jace’s reaction. It’s fine to be an ally and not want to be hit on, or to feel uncomfortable being hit on. He’s seen Jace roll with some flirting from men when they’ve been out with the team, so it isn’t the gay thing , so maybe it’s just an Andrew thing. And wasn’t that a more difficult pill to swallow? They’re friends. It was probably just off-putting to have someone you see as a friend flirt with you. Andrew’s eyes dart around the bar briefly when Jace mentions knowing his way back. If Jace really does leave, Andrew doubts he’d return to the Institute before sunrise.
Not having gotten a word edgewise, Andrew shrugs. “Hey, of course, of course,” he scratches at his jaw absentmindedly. “I’ll probably get another glass and see if I can…” Andrew doesn’t finish his sentence, suddenly feeling as if it were inappropriate to continue. He’s worked up and a little frustrated, sue him. But there’s no need to overshare with Jace, especially now that he sees more clearly where they stand. This doesn’t stop him from extending an olive branch though. They’re friends. It’s only right to make sure they’re okay.
“No harm, right?” He asks, as if they were talking about a spar-gone-wrong or an unintended injury, and not that Jace has just expressed how even the very idea of flirting with Andrew makes him sick. Andrew raises a glass to Jace, waiting for him to clink their glasses in cheers to at least make sure they part on good terms.
...
Jace paused for a moment, a conflicted look coming across his face. He could just try to sit down again. He could finish his drink. He could talk to Andrew like nothing had happened and try to smooth this over, so it wasn't awkward the next time they were paired up to work together. Andrew was trying to smooth it over, Jace could tell and it should have been so easy to try in return but Jace had never been the best at smoothing anything over. He'd never cared enough to smooth things over with people. He was Jace Herondale. He did not care and now, he was severely lacking in that kind of skill.
Jace needs to leave. He couldn't think straight staring at Andrew. He was going to say something stupid that he didn't mean to try and cover up what he was feeling or he was going to say something he did mean and that might be just as bad. Jace needed to get out. He needed to go find another mission he'd be allowed to go on or he needed to go train or something . He needed to not be here.
"Yeah," Jace agrees easily. No harm and there wasn't. Jace hadn't said anything to make Andrew think he liked him. So, why did Jace suddenly feel so exposed and anxious? Andrew was probably taking his reaction an entirely different way, if the expression on his face was anything to go by and Jace should try to fix that. He should force some words out about how it was fine. He should make himself sit and breathe and just try to make this as fine as he could, especially if he didn't want Andrew to take this the wrong way.
But Andrew had clearly already taken it the wrong way and Jace just needed to get the hell out of there before he made it worse. "I'll see you tomorrow," Jace says, his words rushed and distracted. His eyes dart to the door. Jace saw Andrew nearly everyday. The Institute wasn't exceptionally big and Jace wasn't sure if he was more panicked about the idea of seeing Andrew tomorrow or the idea of him having messed up so bad that he wouldn't see Andrew tomorrow.
Jace ignores Andrew's glass entirely. "You uh-" Jace fumbles, anxious and distracted, clearly trying to say something to make their departure polite while also wanting to run out the door. "-have a good night," Jace manages to rush out before he's turning, walking out the front door of the bar and onto the street. Jace keeps walking until he's sure he's out of sight and then, he leans against the wall, a loud frustrated groan ripping from his lips. What the fuck did he just do?
...
What an absolute trainwreck. Andrew watches Jace leave with a frown. He brings his glass to his lips and takes a slow sip. Well, that was an experience. One he’d rather not repeat, really. He pays the tab without paying much attention. In his head, he’s already preparing a To Do List of sorts where this whole mess is concerned.
He needs to file his report as soon as he gets back to the Institute. It would make sure he had the rest of his day tomorrow free. He takes out his phone as he grabs his jacket and heads for the door. Instead of actually wearing it, he tucks it into the crook of his elbow and uses both hands to hold his phone. He makes a quick detour to relieve himself in the restroom before leaving.
He should apologize to Jace about the whole thing too. There really is no excuse for what he did. Granted there wasn't any ill intent but it still made his friend uncomfortable. That makes him think of Alec, and well, he’s screwed if Jace ever brings it up. Or really, if Alec directly asks Andrew if there’s anything that happened tonight. He’s been nothing but unfailingly honest to their Head. It’s one of the reasons Alec trusts him. What was he going to think if he found out Andrew came on to his parabatai? As a joke, yes, but still.
A part of him wants to head for one of his usual haunts for a hookup, another wants to just text someone he’s been with a handful of times and who’s always down for some fun, and yet the one that wins is the part of him that tells him to work on his report on his phone so that he’d be halfway done by the time he got to the Institute.
“You’re a fucking idiot,” he mutters under his breath as he leaves the bar and turns to the direction leading the long way to the Institute. A long walk would do him some good. A long walk and a good fuck, he thinks, but doesn’t make the conscious effort to head anywhere in particular. He shakes his head. No, it would be for the best to head back for the Institute. Whether Jace was there or not, at least Andrew could change into more comfortable clothes and maybe just train the agitation off.
With a draft of his mission report done, he pockets his phone and moves his jacket to one hand. Just as he rounds a corner, he stumbles upon the very blond that had just ditched him.
He’s not sure if Jace sees or recognizes him, but Andrew thinks they’ve had enough of each other for the night. Jace obviously needs the space. He’ll apologize some other time. He blinks; once, twice, then walks away.