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Blaine ends the phone call and buries his face in his hands. The tears come even though he tries his best not to let them, hot and bitter down his face.
There’s a hand on his shoulder that turns into arms wrapped around him. He buries his face in Vera’s shoulder and just cries. He’s so tired of fucking crying.
“I shouldn’t have answered—why the fuck did I answer?”
Vera doesn’t respond, just presses a kiss into the side of his head. They sit like that for a long time, until Blaine isn’t crying anymore and he’s just breathing against her.
I’m sorry, Blaine, I broke it—
Some people just don’t get along—
Lavender—
I miss you, for what it’s worth.
“I’m sorry,” he says eventually. He pulls off of her and wraps his arms around himself. “I just—“
“It’s okay,” she says, running a hand through his curls. “You don’t have anything to apologize for, honey.”
Blaine closes his eyes and leans back against the couch. “It’s raining,” he murmurs.
“I’ve noticed.”
“We used to dance in the rain,” he says. “When we were kids. It was before Kurt, even. Me and Sebastian would dance and play and splash in the rain when we were little, until our mothers would call us back inside and fuss at us for it. We’d come in the house and be soaking wet, laughing until we were crying about it.” He pauses, takes a deep breath. “I’ve been so caught up in missing Kurt that I haven’t allowed myself to miss Bas, not really. I’ve known him my entire life. He’s—was—my best friend.”
Vera brushes one of his curls out of his face. “You’re allowed to miss him, you know,” she says. “Personal question time.”
Blaine blinks and looks at her, quietly signaling for her to continue.
“Do you have any other friends? Besides them?”
“Uh, you?”
Vera’s eyes widen. “You have to make more friends. You can’t latch onto me, Blaine.”
Blaine looks down at his hands. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I didn’t realize I was crowding you.”
Vera pokes him in his side. “No. We aren’t doing that. Don’t get defensive. We’re not just friends anymore. I can’t be your only friend, Blaine.”
Blaine nods. She’s right—
“You’re right,” he says, nodding. “I’ll, um, reach out.”
“I’m always right,” she says, laughing.
Blaine rolls his eyes. There’s a clap of thunder, it reverberates through the city.
Kurt left Sebastian—
Where is he?
Their apartment?
Now they’re all alone—
No, he isn’t alone. He turns to Vera, who’s looking at him, the smallest smile playing on her lips. “Hi,” she says, her voice quiet.
“Hello,” he says back.
“You thinking about them?”
He nods. “How’d you know?”
“You get this look on your face that’s so sad it gives me crippling depression,” she says.
Blaine snorts. “Good to know.” He takes her hand, squeezes. “I have to keep reminding myself that I’m not alone.”
Vera swipes her thumb over his knuckles. “I’ve got you, Blaine.”
“I know,” he says. He kisses her, then. It takes them both by surprise—he’s never kissed her first, he’s always let her take the lead. But he kissed her first this time—and despite her surprise she kisses him back.
It’s normal enough in the beginning—it’s just kissing. But Blaine pushes into it a little more, and then he’s half on top of her and her hands are tangled in his hair and she’s making these little sounds and Blaine wants to he wants to he needs to—
But suddenly she’s not kissing him anymore, and she’s pushing him off of her. “Wait—stop,” she says. Her lips are swollen and her pupils are blown but somehow her voice is steady.
Apologies pour out of Blaine before he can stop them. “I’m sorry—I didn’t mean—Did I make you uncomfortable? I don’t—”
She kisses him chastely on the lips. “It’s okay. I’m fine. It’s just been a long time since anyone’s been that close to me.” She threads her fingers together in her lap. “I don’t—you—shit.”
Blaine blinks. He’s never seen her like this, never seen her stumble over her words. If she knows anything, Vera Johnson knows words. “Vera?”
“It was just too fast—like I said before, love hasn’t been easy for me. Last time I—it didn’t end well. And I don’t—you just got off of the phone with Sebastian—I don’t want to be a distraction, Blaine. I can’t be your distraction.”
Blaine swallows the lump that’s forming in his throat. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I didn’t even think about it like that—”
Vera holds up a hand to cut him off. “You didn’t necessarily do anything wrong—I want to. Eventually. But not like that, because it wouldn’t do anything but hurt both of us. Not like that, Blaine.”
He nods and opens his mouth to speak. “Okay,” he says quietly. “I—I get that. Thank you.”
She smiles and stands up, smoothing out the rumples in her shirt. “Now, what do you want to eat?”