Chapter Text
Thrawn was not a small being. A point you are reminded of every time you stood close to him. He was tall, broad in the shoulders and yet his body moved with grace and intention. The silence with which he walked toward you was almost supernatural. Did he wear dampeners on his Imperial issue durasteel-toed boots just to unnerve his subordinates? The only warning anyone got of his presence was the feel of the air at their side. If they were paying attention. During the time you’d served with Thrawn as his first officer, you’d developed an uncanny sense of his approach.
Thrawn made his way now from the aft end of the bridge. You felt that brush of air as he strode up to stand beside you on the command walkway, his wake carrying with it a hint of his cologne. It smelled clean, masculine and it was all you could do not to blush as the scent mixed with the warmth radiating off his body.
The way he moved, the way he spoke to his officers and maneuvered around a battlefield as if leading were his birthright, the complete trust you and your crew had in him and that smell, that warmth…
You straightened your back to push away your arousal. You were here to do a job, not be turned on by your commanding officer.
“Is my ship ready?” he said in his smooth, calm voice. You hoped to the galaxy that he didn’t see the heat you feel in your cheeks with his Chiss eyes.
“Y-yes sir, we are at full combat readiness.”
“Very good, Commander. You may commence jump when ready.”
“Yes, Admiral.”
You studied Thrawn’s eyes as the familiar lurch of space-time stretched like a rubber band around the Chimaera . The shine of the starlines reflected in them, enhancing their glittering anticipation of the coming battle.
The skirmish was brief, and ended with surgical precision as was the Admiral’s way. Thrawn himself was brilliant, turning what would have been a long, bloody battle into an easy victory. As commonplace as this was, his prowess never ceased to amaze you. Especially that he looked so good doing it.
You were nothing but professional during the battle, but there were moments you caught yourself staring at the back of the Admiral’s neck, imagining what it would be like to brush your hand against it or tousle his hair. It felt so wrong to think these things about him. He was your Admiral, your commander, and an alien. And yet…and yet several times during the engagement you had to wrench your mind away from the unsavory things you wished to do to him behind a closed hatchway.
It was almost a relief to leave his side to complete the drudgery of paperwork and post-battle procedure. Debriefings were attended, reports were filed and order was restored in the galaxy. With the day’s work behind you, you made your way to your quarters to change. You needed some rec room time to let off steam and perhaps some frustration. Lifting something heavy and putting it down again was always a safe bet for relieving that. Well that and some time to yourself in your quarters which would inevitably lead to thoughts you were trying to avoid.
You were nearly to the turbolifts when you saw Thrawn striding down the corridor.
“Ah, Commander,” he said. “I see you’re ready for some exercise.”
“I am sir. What are you doing in the officer’s quarters?”
“Walking offers me time to contemplate and reflect.”
“Oh. Wouldn’t you rather hit the rec room?” to any other commanding officer, speaking so frankly would come as an insult, but never to Thrawn.
“I do not wish to make my officers feel unease while they are alleviating stress.”
“Good point. I guess seeing you in there would make some of the ensigns anxious. They are a bit skittish.”
“Because of me?”
“Because of your reputation. They don’t want to do anything that would make them appear…disappointing. They don’t fear what you can do to them, they fear letting you down. They look up to you and appreciate your praise.”
“Do they?”
“Yes, sir.” You nodded. A small curve appeared on Thrawn’s lips and a shine twinkled in his red eyes. Was he actually flattered that his opinion meant so much to his subordinates? It was honestly really sweet to see him so touched.
“Commander,” he said suddenly bursting through your reverie, “As we seem to both be in need of decompression, would you care to join me in my office to spar?”
“Your…office sir? Oh! Your dojo.”
“Indeed.”
The thought of martial combat practice had not crossed your mind. The other officers didn’t exactly enjoy challenging you as they equally didn’t enjoy being laid out flat on the mat. It had been some time since you sparred actually and you could really use the partner to practice your technique. But with Thrawn? Your lower abdomen tightened with the thought, both with anxiety and arousal. You knew it was a terrible idea with how persistent your attraction to him was today. He looked at you expectantly, his lips showing a hint of a smile. His perfect brows arched upward. You know you could definitely say no, he wouldn’t mind but…there was no way you could.
“Yes, sir. I would.” You said.
You followed him to his office. You’d been here many times with reports, briefings, orders from Coruscant, and other varieties of boring bureaucracy. The whole place smelled of hints of his cologne and his own scent, whatever that was, layered on top of the sterile air circulating through the Chimaera .
Thrawn pressed a button on the wall and the durasteel split open to reveal the soft white walls of a dojo. You only had glimpses of this chamber after Thrawn had the modifications made to it. You marveled at the weapons displayed along the walls and the two droids standing vigil in the back.
“Make yourself comfortable, I will return in a moment.”
“Don’t want to fight in your Whites, sir?” you said with a teasing smile.
The joke seemed to amuse him, you can see it in the way his face softens. “In a moment, Commander. It isn’t fair to trade blows on someone who isn’t adequately prepared.” A return tease. Well, at least he tried.
You did as he suggested, removing your shoes and setting your other workout gear aside. You had just begun looking for sparring gear as Thrawn appeared in the doorway. You realized immediately this sparring idea was a mistake.
Thrawn wore a black tank top that clung to the muscles on his chest and back. He was way more muscular than you would have guessed, especially his arms. Stars were you weak for nice arms. This was going to be a problem.
“Are you alright, Commander?” Kriff, he must have caught you gawking.
“I’m fine, Admiral, I’m ready to start when you are.” You said, trying your best not to react but you knew you were probably lit up clear as morning to his Chiss eyes.
“We will start with stick, is that agreeable to you?”
“Yes, sir, that will work fine.”
It had been a long while since you fought with a stave, but it felt comfortable in your grip. Thrawn wrapped his hands and forearms in protective tape. Your mouth ran dry watching the muscles in his arms work as he wound the tape around them. Suddenly, you were very aware of the stave in your hands and a thought intruded your mind. You imagined a similar shape in your hand only this one was in the Admiral’s pants.
STOP IT. Ignore the arms, ignore his chest, ignore his everything and try to hit and not get hit. Just FOCUS.
Thrawn saluted you with the staff, a gesture you returned in kind. He graciously allowed you to attack first, which was your next mistake of the evening. He had you on the mat in an instant.
“Ow. I should have seen that coming.” You said, wincing.
“You spar with a warrior, Commander.” He said, that damned confidence oozing off his tongue. He extended a hand and helped you to your feet. His grip was firm and strong. Helping you up seemed almost effortless for him. “Again, Commander.” He said with a small smile.
You go again, this time you traded blows, attacking and blocking multiple times before Thrawn had the staff beside your neck.
“Your stance tells me you are unused to stick. Would you prefer empty handed?” Thrawn asked. Yes, you would prefer empty hand however you would also prefer not to touch him lest your mind and body betray you utterly.
“Stick is fine, sir.”
“Then may I offer some suggestions?”
Thrawn explained how to correct yourself and gently moved your body into the correct stance. So much for not touching him. It took all your focus to listen to his pointers instead of letting his voice slosh through your brain. You should never had agreed to this, it was torture.
Soon however, you found your rhythm and time melded into a flurry of stick blows. After a while you began to notice that the tactician known for being unpredictable did indeed have a pattern. You noticed it in his footwork. Because he was tall and you…well weren’t , he was having to lean further into his swings and crouch lower to avoid yours.
Finally, you found the opening you were looking for. You shoved your staff forward and he trips on it. The look of surprise on his face absolutely made all your losses tonight worth it. You pinned him down on the mat, pressing your knee to his chest, your staff inches from his nose. Both of you were breathing hard. Thrawn smiled his small smile again, raising his dark brows as if asking what you’re going to do next.
“Well done, Commander.” He said. You could hear the pride in his voice and knew he wasn’t condescending.
“Thanks, sir.” you said through your labored breaths. You were both breathing hard. Sweat darkened the collar and armpits of Thrawn’s tank top. You’d always wondered if Chiss could sweat and clearly this one could. You could feel the rise and fall of his chest under your knee and you wondered what else you could do to make him breathe this hard.
Enough. You’re done. You can’t do this anymore, not tonight.
You took your knee off his chest and withdrew.
“You showed a great deal of improvement this evening. You should feel proud.” Thrawn said as you helped him up.
“Not without your help, sir.” You said. You began to take off your protective gear which was also soaked with sweat.
Thrawn lifted an eyebrow at you. “Are you finished?” he asked, a small frown on his face. Was he disappointed? You hesitated with the head padding in your hands. You lasted this long, one more round shouldn’t erode your resolve any further, right?
“I guess, I can go one more.” You said, smashing the padding back over your head.
This time, he had you dead to rights. You went down flat on your back so hard the wind went out of you. It was a perfect throw and you almost felt privileged to be on the receiving end. His glowing eyes peered down at you like gems set into his perfect face. You couldn’t fight your attraction any longer, you simply allowed it to exist for the moment.
“Are you alright, Commander?”
“I’m alright. Amazing throw, sir.” You said. “I am definitely going to feel this tomorrow.”
“Perhaps we’ve both had enough for the evening.” He said in a jovial tone. Well, jovial for him.
Groaning, you sat up on the mat. You had to agree, that was definitely enough.
“Are you hungry, Commander?”
“Famished. I usually don’t eat before exercise.” You said, stomach rumbling in response.
“I will call a droid to bring us both our evening meal if you’d like.”
“Actually sir, that sounds amazing.”
He offered his hand once more to help you to your feet. There’s so much confidence and sincerity in his eyes you couldn’t look away.
You must have been more hungry than you thought. You felt unsteady and lightheaded now that you were upright and standing. You took a step forward, sure that the feeling would pass. Your knee gave out immediately. You started to fall and landed directly into Thrawn’s chest.
No, no no no no. Your mind was now in full blown panic mode.
“Oh Kriff, I’m sorry sir. I’m so sorry.” You pushed him away and stepped backward as quickly as you could. But you knew your face was absolutely blazing.
“No need to be embarrassed, come, we will eat and you will be more steady.”
All your resolve, all your attempts to push away your feelings and attraction completely crumbled apart. Thrawn turned to walk away but you watched in horror as you reached out and grabbed his forearm. He turned to face you, eyebrows raised in a question. What were you doing? You couldn’t do this!
“Admiral, uh, Thrawn, I - “
“Yes?” he did that head tilt he so often did when questioning someone.
“I would definitely like to stay for a meal. But - “
“You don’t think this is behavior befitting an admiral and their first officer?”
You hated when he took the words out your mouth like that.
“Yes, sir. It just looks way too much like -”
“Fraternization?” he said, bluntly.
“Yes, sir.”
“Ah. Don’t be too concerned, I won't allow harm to befall one of my best officers. I am no stranger to dealing with the machinations of Coruscant.” He offered a small smile for reassurance.
“No offense sir but knowing you, that’s not entirely reassuring.”
“I understand. If you would rather take your meal elsewhere, I will not be offended.”
“No,” you said, shaking your head. “I’ll stay.”
“Excellent.” He stared down at where you were clutching his arm. “You can let go now.” He said. “I need to call the droid.”
You don’t want to let go. Instead, your feelings and body took control and you pulled toward him and pressed your body against his chest. His scent surrounded you and if you had any ideas of stopping now, they didn’t matter.
“Food is not all I’m hungry for.” You heard yourself say, almost cringing at how ridiculous you sounded.
You pulled him down to you and pressed your mouth against his. He hesitated a moment, a rare show of uncertainty. Then, he leaned into the kiss, returning it in earnest. His mouth tasted so good, better than you imagined. His warmth filled your stomach and sank down into your toes. So much for worrying about fraternization.
The two of you broke away. The dizziness you felt before is back with a vengeance. The only part of the room not spinning is Thrawn’s beautiful blue face. He returned with another kiss, claiming your mouth. It wasn’t shy. It wasn’t hesitant. It was authoritative.
You slipped your tongue through his lips and teeth, savoring. Your tongues met briefly and it felt like electricity jolting through you. His hand moved down your back to rest in the curve of your spine while his other hand held your jaw to gently tilt your face up. You would have never dreamed that this man with his usual glacial demeanor could be capable of this passion.
Pulling away again, you found you're both just as out of breath as you were while sparring.
“Is your appetite satisfied?” he said, almost purring.
“No, no it isn’t.” You admitted. Clutching his sculpted face with both your hands, you pulled him in for more kisses.
Thrawn slid his hands down to your waist. Between breaths he said, “To my study,” as he applied soft pressure to your sides. You followed his lead through another hatchway and into a room aglow with dim lights. It took you a moment to realize the lights were art holograms.
“These are…” you said, pushing back from Thrawn’s embrace. “These are beautiful.”
Thrawn stood, observing your reactions. The lights of the holograms danced in the glow of his eyes. A few strands of his hair fell across his forehead, making him look more alive, less like the statuesque Admiral and more…for lack of a better term, human.
“A question, Commander.” He said.
“Yes?” you said, fully aware of his eyes on you.
“Is this…desire… a whim? Or did I miss this?” he asked.
“I would never insinuate you, master tactician Grand Admiral Thrawn, missed a detail.” You grinned at him playfully.
“It would seem that I have.” He said, raising a brow.
“You really didn’t know?”
“I mistook your discomfort around me as something else entirely. I had hoped sparring with me would make you feel more comfortable as my first officer.”
You burst out laughing. “You thought -” you said, snorting “that fighting would make me feel more comfortable?”
“It was an exercise in trust. But…I see now that I misjudged you, Commander.”
“I was uncomfortable, sir, because you are ridiculously attractive.”
Thrawn blinked and frowned slightly. “But I am a non-human.”
“And you are my type, apparently.”
He continued to look puzzled. “Is that not frowned upon here in the Empire?”
“Are you trying to convince me not to want to eat your face?”
“Excuse me? Eat my…” you pressed a finger to his lips.
“Don’t - I see you thinking, Sir. What I mean is…” You moved in close, your lips brushing against his. “Respectfully, don’t tell me not to enjoy this.”
The eyes from the portraits seemed to be watching you both as you returned to your passions. You spread your fingers through his thick, dark hair. It was even softer than you imagined even in spite of the gel holding it in place.
As commanding a presence Thrawn usually was, he was incredibly tender with you. He brushed his lithe fingers across your cheek to hold your chin in his hand.
“Do you hunger for...more?” he asked in a low, ragged voice.
“What…?”
“I believe your body betrays you.” He said.
Your…body? It was then you noticed where your hands had traveled. They’d crept to the hem of his white uniform pants.
“Oh, sorry. I got carried away.” He looked at you incredulously.
“There is no need to apologize. Tell me, how do you wish to proceed.” You were completely unsure. He put the ball in your court entirely. This was…new. What did you want? The answer rang in your mind clearly.
“Thrawn” you whispered, dropping any titles or honorifics. “I …want you, Thrawn.” You managed to meet his eyes as you declared your desire. They were shining as they often did before battle or while he was making revelations about his enemy.
“Are you certain?” he asked.
You moved your hands down his torso, this time skating across his chest and down his belly to the closure of his pants. Thrawn takes that as an affirmative. You continued kissing him as you worked off his pants. They fell unceremoniously to the floor. He stepped out of them and pushed you back toward the desk in the back of the room.
You leaned against the edge of the desk and allow Thrawn to take his turn undressing you. The feel of his fingers on the skin on your lower abdomen makes your nerves tingle with anticipation. Soon, his long fingers found their way down the front of your underwear. You whimpered as they snaked between your legs to tease at you.
It was only a tease but it awakened something in you. You pushed Thrawn to the floor and straddled him. The position was all too similar to when you finally bested him in the dojo. You pulled off your shirt and breast band and tossed them aside. Thrawn stared. He reached for you, sliding his thumb around the curve of one of your breasts before rolling your nipple between his fingers. The warmth in your stomach and lower abdomen intensified and you sighed, letting the feeling fill you.
Thrawn didn’t comment, merely observed and experimented with his touch. You do the same, tracing the contours of his torso.
“It appears we both have an appreciation for art.” He said, the subtle smile playing on his mouth.
You leaned back down to his face. “I don’t know if I’d call what we’re obviously about to do ‘art’.”
“Of course it is,” he said, “Erotica is something many cultures produce.”
“Thrawn,” you leaned into his ear. “You are going to kill the mood.”
“Apologies.”
You nipped at the lobe of his ear and he gasped. You continued down his neck and collarbone, kissing and administering gentle nips. Your efforts elicited more sounds from him before you returned to his mouth.
“Touch me.” You said.
“Where?”
You directed his hand where you wanted him and gasped as his fingers curled inside you. He began circling your clit with his thumb.
“Ah!”
“More?”
“More.” You said, biting your bottom lip.
You began riding his fingers as they penetrated deeper. His knuckles and fingertips felt so amazing, more than you imagined when you watched him work his datapad or consoles.
“Stars Thrawn, your fingers are ridiculous.” You said through heavy breaths. Your orgasm is threatening but you don’t want to come, not yet.
As if sensing your rising release, Thrawn abruptly stopped and slid his fingers out. You whimpered, aching for them to return.
“Don’t worry. We’re not done.” He purred.
He stopped to marvel at you again. Looking down, you notice his underwear is straining under his erection.
“How did we miss those?” you asked. “May I?” He nodded.
You slid the band of his underwear off. Well. That answered a lot of questions that had been silently nagging in the back of your mind. Your mouth went dry.
It was a mostly human looking penis, save mostly for the skin color. He was also well endowed, which considering his height made sense. Somehow, you were relieved to find it wasn’t a tentacle or something. Though you admitted to yourself it didn’t matter if it was, you wanted him inside you.
“Is something the matter, Commander?”
“Nothing, just ah, admiring the sculpture.”
He actually laughed and put his head down into your shoulder. “ Cseben’bo besbi. ” He said.
“What?”
“I called you a…in Basic it would be ‘funny bird’. It does not translate well.”
You can’t help but laugh yourself and bring him in for another kiss. This man…well this alien, was full of surprises. His guard was now fully down.
He kissed your neck, his breath tickling you. He continued down your chest, bypassing your aching nipples altogether. He kept going, and going, softly dragging his teeth in more sensitive places. You can feel him smile against your skin as you gasp. He kissed your inner thigh and you shivered.
You spread your legs wider to allow Thrawn access to what you’re sure he’s planning to do. With little warning, he took the plunge.
You’re making sounds you never thought you could make. Cursing, moaning, crying out his name, the whole gambit of pleasure sounds you had only heard on pornographic holos. You rolled your hips up and grabbed a fistful of his hair to get more leverage as he feasted upon you.
“Please…” you don’t want to beg but you wanted so badly to come, the pressure was almost too much to bear.
“Not yet.” It isn’t a declaration, it’s a command.
“Ughggggg, Thrawn, you’re merciless.”
“So I’ve been told.” He said. You could feel his breath against your clit and it was almost too much.
Now he was just torturing you to watch you squirm. Well, you were squirming alright and it was leaving you a ruin.
Thrawn ceased and rose to meet your lips. After what you did to his hair and the wetness of his lips and chin from eating you out, he looked more attractive than ever, mess that he was.
“Patience, my funny bird.” He said. You weren’t sure you liked his new pet name for you but it was endearing. He didn’t seem to have the right Basic words for you.
“I swear to the Stars Thrawn if you call me that on the bridge, I will not hesitate to commit a mutiny.”
This got another chuckle out of him. It was bizarre to hear him laugh but oddly you wanted to make him laugh even more.
“Our words are only between us and the artwork. Now, are you ready?”
If he stalled any longer you were going to deck him. “Just fuck me already, Thrawn.”
He positioned himself between your legs. He leaned in to kiss you and you wrap your arms around his neck. His cock wasn’t a monster but it wasn’t small either. You had a small fear that this might hurt but you wanted him inside you so badly you almost didn’t care. Thrawn noticed your hesitation.
“You are tensing, Commander. Do you still want this?”
“Yes, stars, yes.”
“I will not harm you, please, tell me if I am.”
He entered you slowly, giving your body time to stretch around him. He’d properly prepared you so there was no pain, only bliss. You watched his face. He seemed stoic but there was a hint of something in his eyes. Was he worried too?
He began to thrust into you in a slow rhythm. You met his pace. The edge of your orgasm became sharp and ready but you held on, wishing for him to reach a similar peak. But yours was coming too fast. His thrusting increased in speed and you clung to him for dear life.
Your orgasm slammed into you like a wave.
“Thrawn,” you cry out, halfway between a scream and a moan. You can feel yourself spasming around him. You shuddered and flailed as he continued, riding it for as long as you could. When you finally stilled, Thrawn ceased and pulled out of you. He laid your head to rest against the floor gingerly. The glow of his eyes was brighter than you’d ever seen it. You saw him reach down to finish himself.
“Let me,” you said between pants.
“There is no need -”
“Let me,” you said, staring into his eyes. Acknowledging you, he sat and balanced himself with his hands behind him. You approached and grabbed on to his member. He inhaled sharply at your touch. You begin working him as best as you knew how. This was never your strong suit when it came to sexual acts but he seemed to be enjoying it.
His breathing became ragged. “Faster,” he said. The word was accented in a way you hadn’t heard before. His stomach spasmed and his breath caught.
“Ah…” he bit his lip and began thrusting into your hand to help. He began panting.
“Nearly…Commander…” he could barely speak. He was grunting between your motion and his thrusting.
His entire body jerked and he jumped forward to grab hold of you. He said more words in a language you didn’t know. It made you giddy that you could do this to him, the icy, stoic, commanding man.
He finished and lay back on the ground, panting and murmuring what you thought might have been curses.
You join him in the afterglow. The light of his holos playing on his blue skin in this dim light.
“Wouldn’t a bed be more comfortable, Thrawn.”
“In a moment.” He pulled you in, encircling you with his muscular arms. Ah, so he was a cuddler? More surprises.
“That was incredible.” You whispered, pulling his hand up to kiss it. He took your hand and entwined his fingers into yours.
“Likewise.” He breathed.
“So what was that about fraternization and breaking rules?”
He chuckled and turned to you, a sly smile curling his lips. He pressed his forehead against yours almost in a gesture of appreciation of your mind as well as your body. He hummed, closing his eyes.
Then he spoke. “If you speak so much as a word, your new name will be Commander Funny Bird and I will use it on every possible occasion.” He threatened. Cuddling and playful. You could really get used to this. If he would have you.
“So, sparring again next week?”
“Perhaps.” He said, smiling.