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Something’s up with Luz. Willow would like to think she’s a particularly perceptive person, or she just knows Luz that well, but in truth, anyone could see it if they bothered to look at her. Luz usually found History class fascinating, scrawling down notes as fast as she could. Now though, she gazes vacantly at her notebook, her lips curved in a clandestine smile. Willow gently pokes her cheek and Luz starts, seeming to remember where she is. Willow gestures at the teacher. Luz blushes and directs her focus to the front of the classroom.
Yeah, something’s up with Luz. But Willow has a feeling she’ll find out what it is sooner or later.
It turns out to be sooner, because when Willow gets to their usual lunch table Luz and Gus are already there. Luz is practically vibrating with energy, a giddy smile on her face. Willow raises an eyebrow as she takes a seat.
“Is she alright?” Willow mock-whispers to Gus, who shrugs.
“I think she ate some of the griffin treats during Intro to Magical Beasts.”
Luz makes a noise of protest at this. “For your information, I’m proud to say I showed admirable restraint in not doing that.”
“Okay,” Willow says, chuckling. “What’s got you all worked up?”
“What? I am not worked up, in fact one could say that I’m ‘worked down’.” Luz attempts to school her face into an expression of nonchalance, but she doesn’t last five seconds before her smile overtakes it again. “Yeah, I guess I sort of am. But there’s a really great reason why.”
She looks down at her hands, a faint blush painting her cheeks. Willow and Gus eye each other.
“So… are you going to tell us?” Gus prompts. For the third time today, Luz’s gaze snaps back to them, as if she hadn’t realised they were there. Willow’s brow furrows. Luz could be strange at times, but... not like this. And what was with that dreamy look on her face?
“Okay, um, so…” Luz begins, fiddling with her hair, then her food, then the sleeve of her tunic. “Amity and I wanted to tell you this together, but she had to go home early because of some family emergency thing, and I was super disappointed, but she said it was okay for me to tell you because I didn’t how much longer I could keep it a secret-“
As Luz rambles on, Willow feels a sinking sensation in her chest. If she was really being honest with herself, she had sort of seen this coming. Amity’s crush was painfully obvious, to the point where Willow felt embarrassed just watching her flush and stutter her way through interactions with Luz. And on Luz’s part, Gus had told Willow all about her recent repeated visits to the library to walk Amity home after work (using his library card, which apparently got old pretty fast). So, this outcome was not at all unexpected.
Still, the nugget of darkness in her abdomen only grows as Luz confirmed her suspicions. “Amity and I are dating!” she practically squeals.
“Wait, what?” Willow would say that she doesn’t know how Gus would be surprised by this announcement, but she would be lying. Instead, she bites back the discomfort in her throat and reaches across the table to take Luz’s hand.
“That’s amazing, Luz! I’m so happy for you guys,” Willow says, tracing over the lines and callouses of Luz’s hand in a way she hopes is reassuring. Luz beams at her adorably and launches into a vivid recounting of the night she and Amity got together (which apparently involved Hooty swallowing Amity whole??). Willow pastes a smile on her face and turns this news over in her mind.
Luz and Amity. Together. Willow was fine with that. Truly. So why did her heart hurt so much right now?
Amity had mystified Willow for years. Even with the knowledge that the cruel, abrupt ending of their friendship had been her parents’ doing, there were still six whole years in which she did nothing but make Willow feel small. No-one forced Amity to look down her nose at her as she passed by her locker, as if Willow wasn’t worth looking in the eye. No-one forced Amity to constantly show her up in class and make comments dripping with condescension. Willow had come home from school every day fighting back tears and wondering why on the Boiling Isles Amity Blight hated her so much. Years of anger and confusion and self-doubt, that could have been avoided had Amity just told her the truth at any point.
And then Amity had become enthralled by Luz, because of course she had. And suddenly, the bullying stopped, and Amity was sitting with them at lunch now, asking to be friends again, and Willow was supposed to know how to respond to that. It just makes her want to punch something.
And she knows Amity is trying to make up for what happened. At least, she thinks she does. There are times when Willow wonders if Amity’s just putting on appearances to impress Luz. It’s an awful thing to think, she knows, but she can’t help it. So now that Amity had what she wanted, would she stop trying? What if-
No. Willow can’t let herself go down that train of thought again.
“You okay, Willow?”
Willow looks up to see Luz, leaning across the table towards her. She hadn’t even noticed Gus leaving. Willow shakes her head and takes in Luz’s gaze, overflowing with concern. Bright, brilliant Luz, who burst into Willow’s life and made it better within the space of a day. Luz, generous with her hugs and gentle touches. Luz, constantly ready to jump to her defence.
Luz, who is so dang happy with Amity.
Willow is no stranger to biting her tongue for the greater good. She never complained when her dads put her on the Abomination track, despite the taunting, the name calling, how angry being there made her. She couldn’t, because of the things they thought she didn’t notice. Like the frown lines that had become permanent features of Dad’s face. Like the grey hairs beginning to show in Appa’s head. Like the hushed, fervent discussions they had at the dinner table, long after she was supposed to be asleep.
So, it’s not that hard for Willow to swallow the anger in her chest and say, “Yeah, I’ve just got a test coming up, I’m a little stressed about it.”
“Aww, Willow!” Luz, of course, squeezes Willow’s hand in reassurance as they make their way to their lockers. “You’re still one of the strongest witches I know, there’s no way you’ll fail. If you want, I can study with you?”
“I don’t know about that…” Willow fishes for an excuse. “I wouldn’t want to interrupt your precious Amity time.”
That does the trick: Luz blushes instantly, a giddy smile on her face. Willow smiles back. Luz deserves this. All Willow can do is try to be as good a friend to Luz as Luz is to her. As their chatter moves on to other topics, Willow’s confident she’s made the right decision.
Mostly.