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A part of Aether wished he wasn't here at all. He remembers his first days in Teyvat, with only Paimon as his companion. When he first met Amber and she asked for his name, it had been easy to tell her to just called him Traveler since, essentially, that was what he was. When pressed for a name, he told them a fake one - and it passed his lips so easily, this fake name tied to him - that over time "Traveler" became more real to Teyvat more than "Aether" did.
He only heard his name being called once - that one time he assisted Dainsleif with the Abyss, and Lumine had appeared to him only to leave him behind again.
Names had power - Aether had learned on the long years of traveling worlds. Aether would be Aether only for Lumine, and she for him, but to all the worlds they would be anyone else: Wanderer, Sojourner, Voyager.
Traveler, in Teyvat.
He refused to give out his name - he was in this world to find his sister, and though he has grown to love and care for this world and the people in it, Aether dreads attachments, especially when he knows he is always meant to leave them in the end. Lumine once told him he was too soft like that - he gave his heart out too freely too often, and while that drew people to him it also allowed to be taken advantage of, and it opened him to be easily hurt by goodbyes.
Paimon doesn't comment on it; whether she's taken note of it and just stayed silent, or she had completely missed it, Aether doesn't ask. Paimon does know Aether's name, but thankfully still calls him Traveler.
He thinks it would be okay if Paimon called him Aether - she is his first friend in this world after all. With all the time they've spent together on the road, and with the time they'll still have traveling together, he knows he's attached to Paimon now. When the time comes to leave her and this world with Lumine, he knows it will hurt.
But that is a pain that won't come for a long time yet. There are seven nations and seven Archons to meet - and he's only done with three. He still has time to steel his heart. Like Lumine said, they've always had time.
He just didn't expect to be hurt so soon.
~
"They were finished last week," Kokomi slanted him a sad smile, "I know the war is over with the Vision Hunt Decree being rescinded, but I thought you and Paimon would still like to have it regardless."
The uniform in front of him looked ridiculously: to him, it looked like a costume he had to put on to act in. It was in swathes of white, reds, and salmon, with intricate detailing along the hems and sleeves. The armor, at least, looked impressively robust. Lightweight yet solid, it felt comfortable and well crafted - it looked to have been crafted by Hajime back in Inazuma City, and Aether couldn't help but trace his fingers along its outline. On an Inazuman adult warrior, the costume would look striking and bold, impressive even, and quite handsome to wear with its soft fabric. On Aether's medium height and blonde hair, the costume would look ill-fitting - red and white aren't quite his colors.
He clutched the uniform to his chest anyway.
"Thanks Kokomi! Paimon loves this uniform, and they really did make one in my size! I'll go wear it right now!"
Paimon zoomed towards her costume and quickly left to get changed, vanishing in a flurry of stardust. Aether is left with the Sangonomiya general looking at him awkwardly, like she doesn't know what to say next. Aether understands the difficult place Kokomi is in, and it's not his intention to make it harder for her. She is the Divine Priestess of Watatsumi Island, the famed supreme strategic leader of the resistance - she carries more weight and burden than a regular person does, and Aether knows.
"I'm sorry," Kokomi's soft voice wavered slightly, "perhaps it was inappropriate of me to have-"
"How many sets of uniforms did they give you?" Aether found himself asking.
Kokomi's expression shifted to confusion at the question, before coming to understanding. "I was given three. You and Paimon have two."
"Can I take the third set?" Aether asked, his voice surprisingly level, "I wanted to try on the uniform somewhere else, if that's okay." The Sangonomiya Shrine is impressive, huge and spacious and every bit as pristine as any of the grand abodes he's been in. Finding a room for some privacy to change in wasn’t a problem - but it's not the right place to wear this uniform.
It's not where he promised to wear it.
"I understand," Kokomi replied. "I will entertain Paimon while you go on your own. Here, this is...was his intended uniform. Take your time. And also..."
Along with the parcel containing the third set of uniforms, Kokomi handed him a brass key on a chain.
"What's this?" Aether asked.
"His house key," Kokomi quietly replied. "Before he...umm. Well, he wanted you to have it. He said it was so you could visit him whenever you wanted, since writing a note for him somewhere would’ve been inconvenient if it got lost. He gave it to me...before everything turned bad. Then it...then that happened, and it felt like it wasn't the time to give it you, you were so busy, and-"
Aether didn't trust his voice to speak, but he wanted to reply. She needed him to reply, just as much as he needed to.
"Thanks Kokomi."
If Kokomi noticed his voice shaking as he clutched the key in his hand, she didn't comment on it. Aether bowed his head at her in respect and shuffled away.
If Kokomi noticed he was trying hard not to cry, she didn't say anything either. And if he noticed Kokomi was trying not cry as well, he didn't say anything as well. It's a loss they both bear, as leader and and as a friend.
~
Teppei had been, in Aether's eyes, one of the most ordinary persons he's met in Teyvat. His circumstances made him unique, for sure, but he's one of those faces one could easily lose in the crowd. Physically, he was unremarkable: he was a civilian thrust into the conflicts of war to fight against a government edict that threatened his nation. Logically, Teppei had no reason to even want to fight; he's not a Vision bearer, he's weak, he's inexperienced, and he's a little naive.
Reasonably, Aether should not have paid him much attention.
When Aether saved him from some Shogunate soldiers so many weeks ago, it was with the world-weary resignation that he will be one of the people he will save that will later on forget about him. If not, he'll be the kind of person who will ask him for a favor - the Traveler willingly playing everyone's errand boy.
But Teppei had not been that person.
Teppei looked at him and openly showed how much he admired the Traveler. He was amazed at how Traveler was able to use the elements without a Vision, and awed at the fact that he had faced the Raiden Shogun's Musou no Hitotachi and lived. He accompanied Aether to the Resistance's stronghold, personally introduced him to General Gorou, and carried out tasks alongside the Traveler instead of standing idly by. Teppei was young and impressionable, ambitious and eager, and ready to move to action, if it meant he will be fighting for a better Inazuma.
Before Aether realized it, Teppei had become his friend - in the very different way that all his acquaintances in Teyvat were. Being friends with Teppei didn't feel like he was just a coworker, or that talking to him was transactional. The young man didn't feel he was being chummy with him for some inside plot to test him, and he didn't ask the Traveler to do errands for him that he didn't do himself.
He'd been wary of him at first, but over the time they'd know each other under Kokomi's army, they had grown genuinely close, and Aether had grown fond of Teppei's drive to always improve and impress, not for glory, but for himself.
It was like looking at a younger version of himself: bright and impressionable, willing to please and ready to do anything that was asked of him. He had big plans - getting promoted in the army, trips to do together after the war was over, trading stories, even training. What started as Aether indulging Teppei's enthusiasm became an affinity for the young man, and even as Aether's reputation amongst the people skyrocketed to absurd impressions of him, he just knew Teppei would always look at him as the young powerful boy who saved him on those war-torn shores.
~
“Haw-haw, that where you underestimate me! That’s right, I’m learning military management on the job now, just like you,” Teppei crowed, sounding absolutely proud of himself. Aether goggled at him in surprise.
“Wait, you mean…”
Teppei’s grin stretched wide on his face. “You’d better believe it! Thanks to my outstanding achievements in the recent naval battle, I’ve officially been made the captain of my very own unit: Herring I! What do you think? Pretty awesome, right? I spoke to Her Excellency and she says our uniforms are in production. Let’s go collect them together once they’re ready. I can’t wait to put them on! We’re really gonna look the part.”
Aether couldn’t help but chuckle at the sentiment - Ayaka had once offered him an expensive kimono - a kinagashi, he remembers it was called - back when he took her out for a day trip. He refused her, saying that he heavily preferred the clothes he was currently wearing for personal reasons. The resistance uniform would probably be given to him regardless, but he doubts he’ll wear it often.
“Ah, everything’s going great. Our mystery sponsor’s supplies have really helped turned things around…” Teppei’s mutterings peter out, but Aether can’t help but feel suspicious of this “sponsor” that’s helping them. It was just too convenient, like they swooped in to help the rebel army just when they were vulnerable to be exploited…
His thoughts are interrupted with Paimon’s excitement. “Will Paimon get a uniform, too?”
“Of course! You’re a recognized member of the Watatsumi Island resistance,” Teppei beams equally at her, almost just as excited at the prospect of seeing Paimon in a little uniform.
~
“ Kokomi, Gorou... what's going on? ” Paimon asked for both of them.
Gorou turned to face Aether and Paimon and told them what he had to Kokomi. “ Recently, some of our soldiers started showing symptoms of accelerated aging. I called them in for questioning and found out that they'd privately acquired some secret weapons from our sponsor. Most of them are highly ambitious types, vehemently opposed to the Vision Hunt Decree. They've been using these new weapons secretly since getting hold of them. ”
“ So that's why the war has been going unusually well ,” Kokomi muttered, before facing them again with a determined look. “ But risky secret weapons are not the answer. We must put a stop to it immediately. Gorou, have you managed to acquire one of these weapons? ”
“ Most of the officers refused to hand them over. Still, I did manage to get one… ” Aether and Paimon leaned over to look at the item in General Gorou’s hand. Aether’s breath caught as he recognized the familiar device and insignia in the general’s hand.
” Oh dear… ”
“ Traveler, do you know something about this? ”
Aether sighed. “ It's a Fatui Delusion."
~
“ This is a real shame... There I was, thinking I was catching up with ya, haha… Guess I didn't receive the favor of the gods, after all… ”
“ ... ”
“ Hey Traveler, would you do something for me? When our uniforms are ready, grab mine for me... bring it back here, and we can change together… ”
~
Teppei's house was located on a remote corner of Bourou Village. Unlike many of the houses in the village, Teppei's house no longer had a family that lived in it - his family had long since gone to the mainland of Narukami, and Teppei had apparently lost touch with them since he joined the resistance. According to Teppei, he was dead to his family, branded as a rebel and infidel against the Shogun they so revered. The house stood silent in the fading day of Watatsumi Island, the lonely structure a bastion of shadows and memories of a young man who no longer resided in it.
Aether inserted the key given to him and turned inside. The place looked clean and well-maintained - Kokomi has definitely tried keeping this place tidy. There was only a thin sheet of dust on the furniture, but the lanterns and candles inside were well stocked. Aether stood at the center of the small house, and saw the empty kamidana by the corner. There were unused incense sticks by it, but no picture of family. Not even a picture of Teppei.
And Aether-
It breaks him - a little, a bit, a lot - to realize that he doesn't even have a picture of the man he's considered his friend to put on the altar. All he had left of him is an unworn uniform and the memories of a man who burned too brightly too soon.
And he's sad and angry and frustrated because goddammit Aether this is why you don't give out your name, this is why you don't get attached. What's the point of keeping his name a secret if he's willing to give his heart out anyway? He's sad that someone he didn't think was going to be his friend is gone and angry that the Fatui took advantage of someone impressionable like Teppei and so, so, goddamned frustrated that he couldn't save this one person who didn't ask anything of him except his friendship. He's left with so much to remember and nothing to hold on to, and Aether realizes that he will be the only one left to remember Teppei.
Ordinary, unremarkable Teppei, who only wanted to serve his people. Teppei, who wanted to grow strong and fight for himself and the people around him. Teppei, who was young and had ambitions bigger than himself, and was willing to chase after it. Teppei, Aether's friend.
In a small moment, Aether understands a fraction of Ei's desire to pursue stasis as a version of eternity. But the thought passes him quickly, knowing that in stasis and suppression, he would not have traversed worlds with Lumine in the first place. He would not have met Paimon and traveled Teyvat, and he would not have known happiness and sorrow in his life to teach him what it meant to live.
Aether found himself placing Teppei's uniform aside, and opened his own parcel. Gently, he stripped himself of his usual vestments, and donned the captain's uniform.
Captain of Swordfish II, one of Sangonomiya's elite units. He put on every piece of the armor, and found a mirror to look himself in. The uniform fitted him well, the armor covering his vulnerable areas, and the fabric felt cool against his skin. His dark eyes and blonde braid clashed horribly with the colors, but before he could decide against it, Aether unwound his braid and tied it into a high ponytail. He then wore the band that came with the uniform around his head, and looked at himself once more.
He looked like the Outlander trying out the local clothing in the most clashing color scheme. And yet, he knows Teppei would have looked at him and called him impressive.
He then unpacked Teppei's uniform and placed it by the kamidana. Aether knelt before it, and lit the incense with the spark rocks beside it, and stared at the now filled kamidana in silence. He doesn't pray - not to this land's god, nor to anyone. He knows the archons are flawed creatures as well, and he wouldn't trust Celestia for anything at all. But he refuses to stay kneeling in silence for a friend, and so racked his head for a way to commemorate the occasion.
"The war was over before the uniforms were finished," Aether found himself talking to air. His voice was soft, closer to a whisper rather than a speaking voice. "Kokomi gave them to me today, so I thought I should come visit you. I... I promised, didn't I? That I'd bring the uniform here for you, and that we'd change in it together."
The house slowly grew darker as sunset faded to night, and Aether was swift in lighting a few candles to keep the place lit. Before he realized it, he had rose from kneeling and lit all the lanterns in the house, bathing the interior in warm light. He had kept talking in his level voice, telling Teppei of all that's happened since he last saw him: taking down the Delusion factory, Yae Miko's extremely frustrating Anti-Raiden Shogun training, exposing the Tenryou Commissions treachery, his fight against a Harbinger, then his fight against the Raiden Shogun. He told Teppei of playing the hotpot game with Thoma and Ayaka at the Komore Teahouse, and helping Yoimiya with making fireworks. He told Teppei of the strange day he took Ei out to see present Inazuma, and running errands for Kokomi and Gorou in Watatsumi Island, as well as helping them redistribute the seized visions back to their rightful owners, at least to those who would take them back.
He talked himself hoarse until he heard a soft knock on the door, and opened it to see Paimon wearing her uniform, just in the right size.
"Paimon was a little too excited, so I forgot, but Kokomi told me that I could find you hear if you're not back by dinner! We...we promised to change in our uniforms here, didn't we?"
Aether smiled softly at Paimon. "It's okay. Looks like you're not done dressing up though. You forgot the band."
"Paimon didn't forget!" she pouted, before turning sheepishly at him. "Could...could you tie it for me? Here?" Aether laughed, and ushered Paimon inside.
"C'mere, we can finally get in complete uniform together. A promise is a promise, after all."
"Right!"
Aether led Paimon in front of the kamidana. Paimon remained silent as Aether solemnly tied Paimon's little headband around her head, and then turned her to look in the mirror.
Paimon twirled in the air in delight. "Look, look Traveler! Doesn't Paimon look cute and impressive?"
"Certainly impressive for Swordfish II's emergency food."
"Hey! That joke's long past being funny you know!"
"Well, I'm sure the esteemed Captain of Herring I would find you cute and impressive enough."
"That's right! I'm cute and impressive in my new uniform, right Teppei?"
They're met with silence.
Paimon turned to Aether with a sad look. "Paimon wishes Teppei was here to try on his uniform too."
"He would have looked cool and impressive," Aether tried to keep the conversation light, but his voice wavered by the end, and Paimon doesn't miss it.
"Hey Traveler?" Oh no, Aether can't take it when Paimon sounds this genuinely concerned for him, not when he feels this raw and vulnerable. "Paimon gets that you're sad. Teppei was Paimon's friend too, so, Paimon knows how much Teppei meant to you, in the end. So, it's okay. To be sad about losing him. Paimon thinks it's natural to hurt so much about losing someone you really cared about."
Aether chuckled wetly.
"I didn't even want to like him in the first place."
"Yeah, Paimon thought he was too eager to impress. And he idolized you quite a lot."
"But he'd been nice."
"Uh-huh."
"And he didn't even ask me to do his work. Or favors. Or anything. He just...liked me. He just really wanted to be my friend."
"Mm-hmm."
"..."
"..."
"...Do you remember what Zhongli told us about glaze lilies?"
Paimon scratched her head at the change in conversation. "Paimon doesn't think she remembers. That broke archon says a lot of things that confuse Paimon. What did Zhongli say?"
"He once said that singing to glaze lilies makes them more fragrant," Aether recalls the incident, that instead of a blooming glaze lily, they ended up fighting a Cryo Whooperflower.
"Oh yeah, Paimon remembers that!" She snapped her fingers in recollection. "But what's that got to do with our conversation?"
"There's this song," Aether began, "that Lumine and I remember learning in our original world. We learned it when we were young, so long ago, it feels like a distant memory. But I remember the tune, I just need the words. It's a song our parents taught us was about warriors. I just thought...it would be nice."
Aether turned his gaze back to the uniform he placed by the kamidana. "Teppei fought real hard. I think it would make him happy, for someone to sing for him and the battles he’s won."
Paimon nodded her head in agreement. "Alright! Paimon will be here to hum along to your song!"
Aether began humming the familiar tune under his breath, with Paimon trying to imitate it. He remembers the tune his parents sung it to them, and he remembers the weird way they both sung it. Their mother sung the song to them all smiles and lilting voice, but their father sung it in a rumbling baritone, expression torn between happy and sad. He tries to recall the words that have long been buried in memory...
And all at once, the words return to him. Aether began to sing.
"Leaves from the vine
Falling so slow
Like tiny fragile shells
Drifting in the foam
Little soldier boy
Come marching home
…
Brave soldier boy…
…
C-come marching h-home..."
"Aether?"
He looked up at Paimon.
"You're crying."
And he is. Aether cried silently trying not to sob, and Paimon hovered over him as she tried to comfort him. He swiped his hands across his eyes, wiping tears away. But for a moment, he sees the visage of someone sitting in front of him, wearing his new captain uniform and positively beaming at him, calling him by his name. His real name.
" Aether ! Look! We did it! We're captains together! We're gonna do so many great things - as Captain of Swordfish II and Captain of Herring I! Let's keep work ing together, okay?"
He regrets it then, and he sobs this time, knowing that for all the honesty Teppei had given him, he hadn’t even told the guy his real name. He wishes he did, even if it would have hurt even more.
But despite that, Aether thinks it's okay to imagine that - to think of what could have been. In a way, perhaps Teppei has achieved a form of eternity that even the Raiden Shogun would be jealous of - to be forever beholden in Aether's recollection, bright and never aging, where he shines like gold in his memory.
So he’ll do this one person this honor, to remember him when history forgets. He’ll remember Teppei as one of the few real friends he’s made in Teyvat - long after he’s gone.
~
Brave soldier boy
Come marching home