Chapter Text
"--hey dog, are you listening?"
Mo Ran blinks, raising his gaze from the phone to meet an exasperated Xue Meng. He had been going on and on about his latest not-lovers quarrel with those twins and Mo Ran had zoned out in the middle of it, as per usual.
"Yeah, sure," he nods.
"No, you’re not," Xue Meng rolls his eyes and puffs his cheeks. After a beat he leans over to peek at Mo Ran's phone. "What got you so distracted anyway?"
He could easily lift his phone a few centimeters above his head if he wished to keep Xue Meng from snooping. However, upon brief consideration he decides there's no harm in showing, and besides, any conversation that will certainly end up with Xue Meng stuttering and blushing is worth having. He turns his screen to Xue Meng.
"I matched with this guy on tinder, but he's been leaving me on read since Monday," he ends with a dejected sigh - one that, unfortunately, is not entirely for show.
Xue Meng had begun to scoff when his eyes focused on Mo Ran's phone and whatever he was going to say gets choked on his throat, dismay taking over his face.
That was quick, Mo Ran thinks. He frowns.
A quick look tells him that no, he didn't accidentally open the chat, and it's only the very innocent profile picture of his match being displayed.
"That's-- That's--," Xue Meng gasps, glancing from the phone to Mo Ran and back to the phone, as if it had personally offended him. "That's Chu-laoshi!" he manages to cry out, in a high-pitched tone, while pointing an accusatory finger to Mo Ran, and looking pretty much like a scandalized Victorian lady.
“Oh?” Mo Ran perks up and assesses the man in the picture with newfound curiosity. “That's your Chu-laoshi? Fuck, now I get your years-long crush."
Xue Meng doesn’t even acknowledge the teasing and keeps gawking like a fish. A dumb-looking one.
What were the odds? That Xue Meng's precious Chu-laoshi had been attracted to Mo Ran enough to match him in the dating app and engage in some sexy texting? Though, admittedly, the last one was mostly Mo Ran's doing... Well, that's beside the point.
And also who would've thought that Xue Meng's esteemed professor was not a decrepit old man, but instead ultimately, 100% hot? In a nerd-ish way, yes, but still hot as fuck. The most gorgeous man on that damned app, that's for sure.
Xue Meng keeps opening and closing his mouth without making a sound. Mo Ran starts to lose his patience.
"Is this jealousy? Are you jealous?"
At that, he finally snaps back, seething, "Of course not! That is not Chu-laoshi!"
"You just said it was," Mo Ran answers, feeling weirdly bummed out.
"No, you moron. The one in the picture is Chu-laoshi. The person you were talking to, obviously not."
Upon Mo Ran's lost stare, he clicks his tongue and crosses his arms.
"You're being catfished by someone using laoshi's pictures."
Oh, so that's what he meant. Jealousy didn't look well on Xue Meng. To think he'd be in such denial as to believe someone would be impersonating his physics-or-whatever teacher? The pictures, although they did a good job showcasing the man's beauty, were not exactly catfishing material.
Mo Ran suppresses a smirk and humors him, "How are you so sure it's not him?"
"First of all, he would never ever, ever, partake in these shameless dating apps. And second, his name is Chu Wanning." He motions to the name on the profile which, fair enough, was definitely not Chu Wanning. "Who the heck is called "WanYe"?"
Mo Ran frowns, not willing to accept this defeat.
"Many people use aliases in these apps."
Xue Meng snorts, fully recovered from the shock and back to his gloating, insufferable self.
"That's how you got yourself catfished in the first place, dumbass. Don't talk to people so glaringly suspicious."
That could still not be the case, Mo Ran muses. But the lack of many pictures and social media links, the suspicious name and the fact that he had ceased responding when it came to exchanging photos and meeting in person...
Crap, he'd been catfished.
Mo Ran looks back at WanYe's - Chu-laoshi's - picture, trying to swallow down the bitter taste in his mouth.
The thing is: he got really, really invested in this match.
Ever since he found the guy's profile a week ago, he'd been all excited for the moment they would finally meet in person - not that there was any sign they would anytime soon. He was, indeed, left on read, but he still hoped…
Despite the few pictures, Mo Ran could attest he was easily one of the most handsome men he had ever seen, with those high cheekbones, sharp jaw, and thick, sword-shaped eyebrows. An austere, unattainable look that made Mo Ran itch to defile him. A long hair that begged to be pulled. It left him wondering what it would be like to have that severe face contorting under him... Wondering what it would be like to have those small lips parted up around--
Plainly speaking, just looking at him made his cock twitch.
In fact, it was twitching again right now, though it was mellowed down by the knowledge that none of those fantasies were ever close to being real.
(There was something else, too. A gentleness in those phoenix eyes that for some unknown reason flamed a hunger to be seen, to be acknowledged, to bask in his attention. He tried not to think too hard about it.)
Does it mean he is in no position to talk shit about Xue Meng's "Chu-laoshi issues" anymore?
Shit, he was this horny for the man after seeing only a couple of low-quality pictures. Does it mean he would actually have had it worse than Xue Meng, were he the one to be closely instructed and praised by Chu Wanning for so many years?
The thought alone is humiliating and rears a need to bully his cousin, to shift back their power imbalance and make sure MengMeng knows he is still the pathetic one out of them.
"How do you know so much about catfishing anyway? You've been "partaking in these shameless apps", cousin?"
(But it doesn't matter. From now on, Mo Ran will always know they're exactly the same brand of loser.)
"I know basic internet safety, asshole. Try again."
And try again he did, not really bothered that Xue Meng didn't bite the bait.
"I'm sure you do. Been learning all kind of things lately, haven't you? I knew that Mei Hanxue would teach you a thing or two--"
"Who's talking about fucking Mei Hanxue?!"
"Well, I wasn't, but if you want to--" Xue Meng grunts and punches his arm. Mo Ran curses internally and endures it with a grin. Putting up his most innocent voice, he says, "If you'd rather we talked about fucking other people, you could introduce your ge to your Chu-laoshi..."
Xue Meng's reaction is exactly what he predicted - cheeks flaring red and a noise akin to a screech.
"Keep your dirty paws away from Chu-laoshi!" He shouts and storms off, leaving Mo Ran to laugh by himself until his stomach aches.
He looks at Chu Wanning's picture one last time, and finally lets his lips curl down. It was truly a pity. At least he got some laughs off of Xue Meng out of the whole situation.
He closes the app, then, and decides not to think about it anymore.
Of course, he thinks about it again. And again.
First, it was the sheer comical coincidence of it: that someone was impersonating Chu Wanning, of all people, and was unlucky enough to match with Mo Ran, the cousin of Chu Wanning's (self-proclaimed) favorite student.
Then, it was the novelty - the fact that he could finally put a face to the infamous laoshi, the one he never bothered to meet.
He could understand Xue Meng's ever-lasting crush for the man now, and reassessed it with a bit more empathy. He had three boners for the man from only four chaste pictures, how striking must he be in person? How enticing must his voice sound? What would it be like to have that stern face scolding him--
"I told laoshi about that incident," Xue Meng declares from his seat in front of Mo Ran. "He was upset."
Shi Mei makes a noncommittal sound, "Well, that was to be expected. Did you report that account, A-Ran?"
"Yeah. It was deactivated."
"Good. Too bad the person wasn't punished," Shi Mei smiles regretfully and stabs his food with more hostility than necessary.
"They should've been fined! Impersonating Chu-laoshi when there's no way he would ever submit himself to that kind of vulgarity!" Xue Meng spits the words.
Mo Ran ignores them and sighs.
"I wish that was really him."
Xue Meng scoffs, "Dream on."
"You should introduce us."
"No."
"I'd treat your Chu-laoshi right."
"Ew, don't talk about him like that!"
"A-Ran," Shi Mei interrupts, seeming to measure his words carefully, "I don't know how to say this, but… Chu-laoshi isn't interested in you, it wasn't him. You know that, right? There's no point in you meeting him."
That's typical of Shi Mei, to be worried about his feelings like that. Mo Ran attempts a reassuring smile.
"Of course I know that. I only meant that I am interested. Very much so. I would like to take my chances."
"Well, Chu-laoshi would never spare you a look."
"Aww, have some faith in your ge. "
"Who’s calling you ge?!” Xue Meng shouts, easily riled up as always. “Keep your paws to yourself and leave Chu-laoshi alone!"
That puts an end to the conversation and they eat their food in silence for a while.
Mo Ran tries, really tries to let it go for now, but it's stronger than him and after a few minutes he's opening his mouth to ask, "But is he single?"
Xue Meng groans and looks about to throw his plate on Mo Ran’s head. Shi Mei speaks instead, wearing a pacifying smile.
"Yes, but he doesn't date, A-Ran."
"Like… Ever?"
"Mmn," Shi Mei nods and takes another bite of rice, looking at Mo Ran attentively.
There was a time Mo Ran would've preened under that gaze, pulled a toothy grin and done everything - anything - to keep those eyes on him.
Now, he only hums.
"Is he, like, asexual or what?"
"I don't know," he shrugs.
Ever the optimist, Mo Ran nods and says, "Well, then I only have to find out."
"Mo Ran, I swear, if I catch you importuning him even once, I'm telling dad--"
Xue Meng is set on hiding Chu Wanning from him.
Mo Ran is set on meeting the man.
They go on like this for the whole week.
It’s an “immovable object meets unstoppable force” kind of situation, but between the both of them, they know who's the pettiest bitch.
(It’s Mo Ran. Of fucking course it’s Mo Ran.)
It is only a matter of time, then.
There were, surely, other ways for Mo Ran to get what he wanted.
First, there was his uncle, who would not hesitate to introduce Mo Ran to his long-time friend if he poked the right places and showed enough interest. But what would Chu Wanning's first impression of him be if he was to be coddled like a child by his uncle?
He could ask Shi Mei, too, but his friend looked so uncomfortable discussing anything related to his Professor's personal life. Mo Ran would rather not put him in that position.
And there was always the possibility of going to the open lectures Chu Wanning often taught. But the figure of this renowned professor seemed a bit untouchable if he was to approach him as a random student. Unbelievably hot and straight out of Mo Ran’s wet dreams, but unfortunately too unattainable.
These were all feasible one way or another if he was desperate, but somewhat tricky. Which turned Xue Meng into the best option.
"No. Stop barking about it," comes the answer once again. There's a smugness in Xue Meng's expression, probably proud of all the dog-related insults he's been coming up with these past few days. It makes Mo Ran eager to wipe that smile from his face. Preferably by fucking his favorite teacher.
He groans, tossing his head behind and sinking against the couch. Regret. So much regret.
He could've met Chu Wanning years ago, if he wasn't so stubborn. If only once had he given in and joined his uncle in one of those fancy dinners or academic events. But the dinner parties were filled with the kind of people who used to scorn him and his mother, and anything university-related always rubbed him the wrong way, reminding him of his shortcomings and how unfit he was for any of that…
Still, had he known what he would find if he joined any of those, he would have made the effort.
There's an ugly resentment against all of them - Xue Meng, uncle, aunt, and even sweet Shi Mei - for hiding the precious gem that is Chu Wanning. Why hadn't anyone ever tried to pry his eyes open to what he was missing?
(Except they did, didn't they? But they told him about this intelligent, sharp, good person and failed to mention his sharp jaw and his sculpted nose and--)
"Why do you want to meet him so much anyway?"
"... I may have a crush."
Surprisingly, it's not so far from the truth. He is kinda obsessed with Chu Wanning, for lack of a better word. And what is a crush if not an obsession?
"Shut up, you've only seen three pictures."
"Four, actually. And I also know he's the most patient and generous human being on Earth, since he puts up with you."
"Mo Ran..."
"And he is hot!" He blurts, unable to help himself. "So very hot."
"Don't talk about Chu-laoshi like that!" he exclaims, shaking his head and looking nauseous.
Which is a bold act from someone whose first time jerking off was probably to some fantasy starring Chu-laoshi. That or his own reflection in the mirror, Mo Ran supposes.
"Well, he is gorgeous."
"Of course he is, but that’s none of your business."
"And he's just my type."
"He is so not your type." Before Mo Ran opens his mouth to refute, he glares at him and says, "Rong Jiu and Song Qiutong are your type. Even Shi Mei is your type. Chu-laoshi is not."
He doesn’t bother explaining that Rong Jiu and Song Qiutong were his type precisely because Shi Mei was his type. But that ship had sunk before even sailing, and some things are better left unsaid.
"That was before," is the answer he settles for.
“Well, you are not his type, then.”
“You said you never saw him dating anyone, how can you tell?”
“I just know it! He has good taste!”
Mo Ran pouts and bites his cheek.
As much fun as he had pestering Xue Meng, all these refutals and insistence about how he's not good enough are starting to hit him where it hurts.
"Why are you so worried then, if you know I don't stand a chance?"
Xue Meng pauses and scrutinizes him for a good minute or two.
"Will you leave me alone if I introduce you to him?"
"Yes!"
"... Alright."
It's so easy and simple compared to the whole week Mo Ran spent wearing him down, that it takes a moment for his brain to make out the meaning of that answer.
He gasps, "Wait, for real?"
"Yes. You’re right, there's no need for me to worry. You meet him, he ignores you, then you mope and move on. That's the only possible outcome." Xue Meng nods to himself. "He's not promiscuous like you. And he would never do anything as disgraceful as, as-- hooking up," he whispers the last word and averts his eyes.
Mo Ran whistles. "Wow, spoken like a true virgin."
"Shut up. Anyway, Chu-laoshi is respectful, elegant, graceful, and leagues above you."
That's what Xue Meng says. What Mo Ran hears is "Change tactics! He's not in for an easy hook up, you'll have to win him first!"
He smiles then, like the good dog he is, thankful for the bone tossed at him, and immediately forgets about any grievance he'd begun to feel.
"Got it. Thanks, cousin!"