Chapter Text
Kieran looked at the snow, and almost flashed back to the past. Seeing her flowing red hair layer the white snow reminded him of the blood painted by his own hand across Ardhalis. That was, however, until she turned to him, her smile warmer than her dried lips would let him believe.
And at that simple sight, the only crimson shade that was on his mind was the flush of her cheeks as she looked into his eyes.
A gentle laugh resonated through Lauren’s closed, upturned lips. "What are you looking at?"
"I'll give you one guess," he smirked.
"Me?"
"Still the smartest person I know."
She scoffed and scooted closer to him for warmth, resting her head against his broad shoulder. He could smell the cotton and lavender off the oversized knit hat he encouraged her to wear. In his defense, she was sensitive to the cold, plus...she looked damn good in that hat.
Lauren hummed as she closed her eyes. "Still the smoothest talker I know."
"If I don't have my dashing wit and charm, what's left, love?"
"Hmm," she pondered playfully for half a beat too long to toy with him. "Cheesy smirks and timeless gimmicks?"
"You know me well," he laughed and turned his face to her, nuzzling the top of her forehead. "Better than anyone."
In that solemn, peaceful, silence, he breathed. He breathed and realized he never really noticed his own breath—not until it synched up so in rhythm with hers by his side. Her wispy inhales, her relieved exhales. Truly, she was alive.
"Anyone?"
"Anyone," he soothed.
"Even more than you know yourself?"
"Sometimes, yes."
The banters that used to be so catlike in nature, over the years, had melted into unfinished sentences where the other always knew what the next line was. She'd finish his thoughts, he'd nod and accept. Who'd have thought that a cop and a criminal would make such a perfect pair?
They laid for a bit with each other, drowning out the words of the wind and letting the chime of a bluejay in a nearby tree fill the space.
He had never seen her look so at peace. Every once in a while, a calmness would shade her, but she seemed to be in bliss here. It wasn't a feeling he, himself, was all too familiar with, but he'd be lying in saying she wasn't the most picturesque example of that reverence.
"Kieran?"
"Hm?" he hummed back to her. Her voice was so light on the wind.
"Did I tell you why I wanted to come here?"
He took a moment to think. "I don't think you did, actually, but you know I'd follow you anywhere regardless of the location."
"I...used to lay here with Dylan when we were younger. He'd always talk about flowers that would bloom even under the heavy inches of snow."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah," she laughed, slightly pained, "then he'd complain about how his dad always forced him to learn flower facts."
It was rare of her to share memories of him. Even though it had been so long, he was still a sore subject, especially with the new perspective she had gained. Kieran, though, tried his best to make her comfortable enough to share when she felt ready.
"Well...flowers aren't too boring, are they?"
A melancholic smile melted past her previous laughter as the memory faded. "Not to me, at least— I still like learning. In a way...it makes me feel closer to him the more I discover, almost like I'm uncovering a piece of his past that I never got to hear from him myself."
There was a waver in her voice. It was short, shallow, but that owned reflection didn't come out without an internal wring. She processed her own words as they left. She never intended to peek back to the last.
"Sorry, that's...I don't...ever really talk about him with you. I try not to, but being here is really nostalgic."
"Lauren, listen." Kieran sat up and looked down at her, a bitter expression painted on her face. "You don't have to apologize for remembering. The fact that you trust me enough to tell me this means a lot. It's comforting, alone, to know you'd even bring me to some place that was so special to you."
"I wanted to take that first step."
"Well, how about this, then?" he suggested, turning behind him and facing her again with a newly plucked flower in hand. "Tell me about whatever this is, botanist Sinclair. Let me know more."
"That's a Snowdrop. They usually bloom in late winter."
She hadn't seen one in years. They'd only grown in this spot of the city, and she hadn't been back since Dylan's disappearance. They were just as beautiful as she remembered.
Lauren gently cradled it from out of his hand and straightened out the stem like a fragile doll about to crack. "He would always make it a challenge to make a flower crown out of any flower, even these."
"Flower crown, huh?"
"Have you ever made one?"
"Oh, absolutely. I'm on an artisanal level of flower crown making."
She rolled her eyes and started to work with her hands with an annoyed expression. "What's the point of lying to me?"
"Better I say it out loud and sound cool until you realize I'm lying than tell you flat out I can't do something you're making sound easy," Kieran smirked before taking another Snowdrop from behind him. "It couldn't be too hard, though, right?"
"You want to bet?"
"Try me."
"Alright," she smiled, half because she was excited to do this after so many years and half because she had a feeling he would fail miserably.
And, god, was she right.
"What do you mean this loops around the right side? I definitely remember doing tha-"
"No, no, not that side. Kieran, I said underneath and then around the right side."
"When!?"
He'd only been trying for five minutes and somehow he already failed... miserably…. four times in a row . You'd think someone with slight artistry would be able to weave flower stems, but from the looks of it, clearly this wasn't his strong suit.
Kieran sat up from his spot on the ground next to her and got on his knees, hunching over to focus better on the strands in his shakily cold hands. "Okay, look , there has to be something wrong with these types of flowers. This is literally impossi-"
Before he could finish speaking, she took the one she had handily finished and put it on top of his head. The grin she gave him was both adorable and shit-eating all at once. Typical Lauren Sinclair.
She blinked at him with kind eyes, entirely feigning the innocence of an amateur weaver. Show off. Still, that didn't stop him from admiring how beautiful she looked in her victory.
"I have no idea how you managed to do this so quickly, but thank you. Shame to say I don't have one to give you in return."
Lauren turned to him with a wickedly pleasant grin. "Oh, don't worry," she lilted as she laced some of his dark curls around the snowdrops, "I didn't think you would anyways."
Even though that prideful look on her face was beautifully suited, he wouldn't leave her empty handed. A gentleman wouldn't do that, now, would they?
Kieran lowered her hands to her lap and moved in with a whisper. "Close your eyes and open your palm."
She raised her eyebrows in surprise and stifled a laugh. How romantic of him. "Doing a magic trick?"
"I'm no maleficar, love. Just trust me, alright? It'll be worth it."
She obliged, fluttering her eyes shut and trying to resist all temptation to take a peek, relying only on sounds to guide. The snow slightly crunched, a new stem was plucked, and she could have sworn she heard him cuss quietly under his breath—he must have been struggling.
"Fifth time's the charm?" she goaded playfully. It wasn't to mock him, of course. To her, it was... motivational .
"You'll have to wait to see."
"I hope not too long. My hand is getting pretty heavy."
He shifted back and placed something delicately in her hand. "Alright, alright. Go ahead."
What could it have been? It definitely felt too light and too small to be what she was expecting.
When she opened her eyes, she had to try her best to stifle her laughter. In her hands—well hand —was the smallest flower crown she'd ever seen.
"Is this supposed to be for my head ?"
"Well, you're not a mouse , so no," Kieran joked. "Where else could you put it?"
Where else could you…?
"You're not proposing marriage , are you?"
Immediately, he choked on his own spit, almost doubling over at her question. "Marriage? Ah, well, aren't you being forward?" He'd feign suaveness, but his throat dried the second the mention of union left her lips.
She thought for a moment about the idea. They had been together for years, and not once had he given any indication that he would want them to be joined in a traditional union. Was that something he cared about? Hell, was that something she cared about?
"I've never really thought about it. Have you?"
"I... suppose a while ago I had. After the Phantom Scythe fell," he recalled, looking off into the distance to materialize the memory. "I didn't know where we stood. I worried...we would fade away. Your life would go back to normal and you'd be set up like every other beautiful rich heir I've heard about."
"Did you think I'd just forget you?"
"Of course not. I always leave a lasting impression, after all," Kieran smirked, "but the emotions we had between us—I didn't know how far you'd allow me to take them."
Lauren looked down at the twisted ring in her icy palm, a singular snowdrop blooming from the haphazardly twined stems.
"But to be honest with you, I don't feel the need to tie myself to you through something like that. Rings and ceremonies—that's for the high class. But us…"
"Kieran?" she asked, about to turn to take his hand before he faced her again with the most earnest of eyes she'd seen from him in years.
"We're partners, and that's all that matters. Always have and always will be," he cupped his warm hands around hers and looked down at them. "I'll be by your side until the end, wherever and whenever it may be. You have my word, but…"
She cocked her head to the side at his hesitance.
"...if this mouse crown seems like a promise to you," he closed his eyes and shifted onto one knee, taking the ring from within her hands, "will you...be my mouse crown queen ?"
Lauren squinched up her lip sourly and hit his shoulder, knocking him over to the side as he collapsed into a fit of laughter.
"God, Kieran!"
"You didn't give me an answer!" he gasped through chuckles, trying to regain his breath.
He could be so playfully idiotic at times. He really seemed to let that trait out more the longer she knew him.
"My answer is that you're not funny. Sometimes you really are insufferable."
"Ahh, come on! You love it."
Lauren shrugged and rolled her eyes at him—her usual reaction to his antics. “What are you supposed to be, then, if I'm the mouse queen?"
"Mouse court jester , of course."
“Oh? And why not my mouse king?”
He snickered sweetly and took the ring from her palm and held her hand in his, placing a gentle kiss on her cold skin. "If my queen so desires."
Leave it to him to amp up the poeticness when they were in a moment of intimacy. Not that it was wanted, but she found it endearing he'd bring her into a fantasy with those few simple words.
"We're talking about something as stupid as mice and here you are treating me as though I'm the Queen of Ardhalis."
"The mouse kingdom is quite serious, Lauren. It needs a good ruler, what with the famine and trauma."
"Ah, right , right," she played along, nodding with a gentle smile. "And the mouse kingdom tax returns?"
"A generous monarch. So what do you say? Will you accept this position? It's full of danger, lifelong banter, and my undivided attention."
Clearly, he wasn't talking of mice nor of kingdoms.
"Is this..?"
Lauren hushed as she looked into his eyes—his soothing, honest eyes. It wasn't the proposal she'd heard about in the storybooks her parents would read to her at night, but when had her and Kieran's relationship ever been typical? This was them.
"It's whatever you want it to be," he assured. His hands were slightly trembling, but she couldn't tell if it was from the cold or his own nerves.
Time froze as she captured the moment. She wasn't hesitant, not in the slightest, but she wanted to remember this promise forever—this ephemeral sight of his flushed cheeks and hopeful gaze.
She huffed a short relieved chuckle, light as her honeyed voice had always been to him, and moved his hand to push the cold ring onto her finger. "Then I accept."
Kieran's eyes slightly shot up in surprise before settling down warmly on her. She looked the same, sounded the same when they first became partners, but this was an affirmation—they would be partners for life.
"You know, this ring is probably not going to last that long, right?" he asked coyly, bringing his hands up to cup her face. "Twigs and stems aren't exactly a band of solid silver or gold."
Lauren tilted her head slightly into his warm palms before cupping her hands over his and leaning forward to kiss him, eyes shutting delicately. "I don't want gold."
"Silver, then?"
"Missing the point."
"Oh, am I now?" he inched closer, body cradling around her own as they both fell back into the snow—just as his lips fell forward onto hers.
His knees and elbows dug into the ground as his body pressed against hers. The shifting of their coats against each other were the only sounds allowed in their space. Their only focus was each other.
"You always seem to."
A kiss. "Apologies, m'lady."
" Don't- "
Another peck. "M' laaaady ."
He could feel her lips twist in annoyance from under his own, but he couldn't help it. Lauren was the only person he'd learned to truly be himself around. Even if she seemed to judge, it was all in jest. She had shown to love every single bit of him, even the obnoxiously humorous part.
Lauren shifted her hands through his coiled locks as her head gently hit the snow underneath her. She needed the most comfortable pose possible to enjoy his taste in her mouth again—sweet and familiar, warm against the icy chill surrounding them.
"Lauren Sinclair," he called through his silvery voice. "Everything I have and everything I am is yours forever. Never forget that."
She tilted her head to the side with a wild grin—one that only she could make both alluring and virtuous all at once. "Is this your mouse crown vows?"
"I'm wholly serious." His eyes were focused. There was not a slice of humor to be had. "Thank you for letting me love you, even after it all—after everything between us."
"Kieran…"
He still couldn't believe that this was the life he lived. The pure white wasteland made it seem all the more like a dream, but here she was, breathing warmly underneath him with eyes that soothed even his most troubled heart and conscience. God, was he grateful for those eyes.
Their silence was so warm, their soft looks melting as soon as they saw each other's cheeks raise with their smiles. I love you wasn't said—it was felt.
She laughed as quiet as a whisper at the sight of his flushed face. "Come here, Mouse Crown."
Kieran smiled and kissed her again, obedient to his queen as a royal should be. He would always be in her service, be it in matters of the heart or otherwise.
"As you wish, Mouse Queen."