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Her little finger would twitch every now and again. It wasn’t something she took major note of—a magnesium deficiency, stress, trauma—any combination of a million things could cause the little twitch of her little finger.
A porcelain teacup shattered when two fingers twitched. Pride welled up within her when the golden shards went dancing across the floor. Her thoughts began to race with words that didn’t seem natural.
“I’m going to make you great.”
~*~
She couldn’t tell anyone. It wasn’t like anyone would be able to find out—she’d found a way to suppress the movements and the unnatural flow of chakra. Nothing went flying anymore. She wasted more focus on keeping her body still rather than paying attention to the world around her. The bruises on her shin were proof of that.
“Shame you insist on holding yourself back. Greatness is at your fingertips, let it flow.”
She shook her head.
Trauma. It was all trauma . With the war long over and the blood of hundreds staining her skin, the first haunted her. Every now and again she would dream she was back there, The dust in the cave settled in her lungs, caking them in clay. She could feel the poison eating away at her veins and arteries, destroying the lining of her stomach while rotting her liver. She still hadn’t quite recovered from that bit. Liver damage was a bit harder to reverse—but it still functioned and that was good enough for her.
She chuckled—no—her body chuckled. “ You’re lucky you kept it, in all honesty.”
Yes, quite lucky am I.
Sakura stepped around the piles of clothes on her floor towards her closet. She wrenched the door open, avoiding the mirror she’d covered with a sheet her period had ruined. For once she was grateful for her hoarding habits, less so for the lack of care towards her nicer items. Blood was easy to get out if one had the willpower to do so.
She kept the lights off in her apartment, the cream-colored walls reflected enough light that the windows let in. At night she would sleep wherever she landed, it wasn’t too complicated. She grabbed at a pair of scrubs and pulled them on fast as she could. Leaving fabric hanging around her neck felt like a nightmare come to life. She didn’t like anything being around her neck. Her greasy hair lived in a bun now. Pinned up with metal and dry shampoo.
It was trauma, she knew it was trauma, but she couldn’t shake the idea of a murder living inside her mind watching her change and bathe and she hated the idea of giving him something to strangle her to death with. Sakura was sure the news would be taken with a great old laugh, though. ‘ Medical genius and war hero Haruno Sakura found dead this morning because she strangled herself trying to get on her unwashed scrubs. At nine we’ll talk about the possible contamination from wearing unwashed clothes around a hospital. Nuka, back to you.’
She chuckled, or was it him? No, no it was her. She was funny and she knew that.
Grabbing the dry shampoo on her dresser she all but emptied it in her hair, scratched it in—being careful to avoid knocking her bun out—and left for work.
“I forgot how nice the air feels on skin. I’m sure it’d feel nicer up close to the surface. Does flesh give it a bit of warmth? Do you think you ever truly feel the air as it is or does your skin filter it to make it a bit more pleasant?”
An interesting thought, a murderer wouldn’t have such interesting thoughts. She would though, she liked interesting.
Air tells us what we feel, I don’t think skin gives anything but comfort to whatever the air decides.
That was a good answer to herself . She approved: Sakura Seal of Success .
Pushing into the hospital, an hour before her shift, she solidified her theory. It was freezing inside whereas the five-in-the-morning-air outside held a touch of sun to it.
“Good morning, Sakura-san. You’re a touch early for your shift, aren’t you? You aren’t scheduled to clock in until—”
“It’s no worry Tanaka-san. I woke up early after a good night’s rest and figured I could clock in a bit early. Besides, maybe I’ll leave early too!” Little lies were little problems and those could easily be dealt with by her conscience.
No one could know that behind her waking eyes were images of the cave, of the man carved in wood. Sometimes the battle would continue, Chiyo dead on the ground leaving Sakura to fight till her dying breath. She’d be carved in cherry wood, stained a dusty pink, and made to dance about her friends as though nothing was wrong with her lifeless eyes and the voice that sounded so sad no matter the words she sang.
Other times she roasted food over the trunk of his body, his arms and legs sticking up like a weird pyramid, the fingers would twitch, but that was because the wood was breaking apart.
“I don’t much like that dream. ”
You can suck it.
Sakura scanned her ID and plucked up the first patient board her fingers grazed.
Sakura flipped through the pages as the antiseptic air soaked into her cloak, masking the cocoanut scent of her dry shampoo.
Let’s see what we’ve gotten ourself today.
‘Four-year-old boy, stomach ache after daycare. Daycare was held outside, the kids foraged around and had fun, he went down for a nap, that’s when he started feeling sick. Room Six, checked in last night. Patient hasn’t improved on IV saline drip. Painkillers administered through the drip seem to be helping.
Patient hasn’t had any bowel movements or emptied his bladder since arriving. Skin is slightly jaundiced since blood draws at three in the morning. CBC and CMP showing high—’
Her hand froze before she could knock on the door.
“You know what this is, correct? ”
She shook herself free. Her concentration waned as she read. That was something to look out for. The door handle was a nice sharp reminder of reality, she knocked and waited for a little sound before pushing the door open.
The boy on the bed looked up at her as she turned on the light. His eyes were shot, the veins around his orbital bone darkening. That hadn’t been noted in his chart, unless it had set on recently?
“Hello, I’m doctor Haruno, what’s your name?” Shutting the door fast as she could, Sakura made her way over to his bedside.
His smile was toothy. That was a good sign. “My name is Ken, I’m four. I like blue, and my best friend’s name is Tonji, his favorite color is purple, which is a girl’s color.” Ken pursed his blue lips out, holding in a laugh.
“I think purple can be quite a manly color, I know lots of strong ninja who like purple. But blue is also a great color too. How are you feeling Ken? Your parents told us you weren’t feeling too well after daycare.” She sat on the bed, giving him a visual and physical check-over.
He was bloated, the little bits of fat in his body seemed to turn to mush under her fingers. “Does that hurt?”
“Nope.” He popped the ‘p’ of his sentence, seemingly generally cheerful for a boy whose body was attacking him from the inside out.
“What could it be, what could it be?” He hummed through her thoughts.
She hadn’t a clue what it could be. There was nothing in the area that could cause a reaction like this.
“I think we’re gonna need to run some more tests—”
“I’m disappointed you don’t know, but then again this is the perfect teaching opportunity.”
“No worries though, I’m going to find out what’s going on—”
“This boy has three hours left, maybe four if those IV antibiotics can fight it long enough. But that’s a long shot. Then again I haven’t been in a hospital in ages.”
“Would you like some breakfast, or would you like to sleep more after I draw these labs?”
“If you would listen to me, I could tell you exactly what to draw, what to test for, how to find it, and how to save this boy’s life. I give the painkillers another hour and a half before they can’t fight what’s happening inside his body. Your choice. You either accept that I’m here to make you great—that I chose you to become great, or this little boy can rot from the inside out like the rest of the bodies you left out on the field. Make your call Sakura Haruno .”
~*~
The water was freezing around her, drowning her screams as it filled her lungs. She gripped the edges of the tub, doing her best to stay under.
He wouldn’t let her.
Warmth would fill her as black invaded her vision. Sight would return as she found herself draped over the side of the tub, contents of her stomach all over the rug.
~*~
He was a medic in a sense. He understood how the body worked and how it failed. He had perfected his own—bestowing upon himself immortality.
It was the first thing he had done when he entered her mind. She knew it had to have been. He figured how to tap the stream of chakra in her body before he figured how to present his own thoughts. Any wound she inflicted was rapidly healed.
She couldn’t live like this.
He was immortal.
~*~
She uncovered the mirrors in her home. She showered off the grime that covered her skin. She went numb as she allowed Sasori of the Red Sand to practice puppetry through her fingers at the expense of a little boy living to see another morning.
It was an odd sensation, to say the least. She could turn chakra into a weapon, but using it as a tool in this sense was completely foreign—almost literally as Konoha didn’t really practice the art of puppetry. Sakura liked learning, challenges were exciting once the horror wore off that a dead man’s soul was thriving in her body. And then the horror washed over her again, and her stomach emptied.
“And here I was thinking you’d be thrilled that you’d done the right thing.”
She didn’t have a response. She simply let him move her limbs and watched as the objects in her room danced. Her robe partnered with a sock, and her perfume bottle with a tube of lipstick Ino had gifted her for Christmas. She hadn’t the chance to wear the shade yet, a beautiful mulled color. Ino said it drew out the green in her eyes and complemented her skin and hair.
Sakura went with it, all she knew was that it was darker and pretty. That was all that mattered with makeup anyways.
“Interesting thoughts—gives me an idea.”
Her body stood from her bed and walked over to her vanity. She felt him pull at her memories of where her cosmetics were placed.
Lipsticks in the bottom drawer of the pencil tower she used. One drawer up was eye products. Next were eyeshadows, and then foundation and face products. Face brushes were next, she hadn’t cleaned them in months, and then eye brushes.
She pulled back to herself, gasping as she slapped her hands against the vanity counter.
“What are you doing!” Her lungs felt tight. She tasted sand and dry air, cactus blossoms danced in her nose with heat—she didn’t think heat could have a smell.
“I wanted to try something. Hold still.”
Everything felt like tiny bugs were crawling on her skin, she hated that feeling. Numbness was a horrible thing. She could picture the blood pooling in her limbs—
“Don’t be dramatic, you only feel this way because you shut me out so much. You’ll learn to relax. You’ll learn to let me in and let me help you. Oh, the potential you have. You killed me, a feat in and of itself. Oh, I can make you even greater. Now just relax some. It’ll feel better, less bugsy.”
Her jaw quivered, tears almost welled in her eyes as her hands reached for her foundation sponge and started applying a thin layer on her skin. She did her best to ignore the almost overlapping image of a man with tanned skin and bloody hair dripping down his face.
“I think your friend was right, a marvelous shade. I wouldn’t have thought to paint this on you—that would have been a shame. But your natural color is also quite delicate.” Her teeth bit her lips some, drawing blood and color to them. “ See? So elegant a color. A base of orange and green, dash of yellow and blue, finally white with a spot of red. Yes, I think that would do quite well to match.”
She drove out his thoughts of mixing paint. But she’d relaxed too far. She saw his pallet knife grabbing the splotches of paint from a board and mixing them up. Mulling the paints together until the cream matched the pinky nude of her lips.
It was perfect.
“I’d use it as a blush as well, along with any pink bits of you. That would have been perfect. But no, this is a good alternative. Stop the tearing, it’ll mess up the shadow.”
Her hand was steady as it dipped into a taupe and blended into her crease. It was odd, meeting her own gaze in the mirror and not seeing herself stare back. Her eyes were glassy and surrounded with some matte shades of brown and a light bit of pink glitter.
Then came a bit of liner, lashes, a soft warm blush, and lastly, the lipstick—it was patted on so carefully, the color hardly transferred onto her mouth. They looked stained with small bruises. Almost looking as if she’d been kissed all night long. Her lips curled in and rubbed together before popping.
“Perfect—” she screamed.
Her vanity chair tumbled under her as she fell backward.
“No, no, no, no. You do not use my voice.” Tears fell, her head jerked up.
" You’re going to ruin your makeup, and I worked so hard on it.”
“Stop it!”
“Goodness, all this over a few words? Pick yourself up, this is quite unbecoming. Oh, I’ve another idea!” Her body pulled itself up and marched over to her closet. “I’ve seen some of the dresses in here, those are becoming of you. Powerful dress for a powerful woman. I am excited, haven’t had a drink in ages.”
“What does that have to do with me? I don’t like drinking.”
“You drank quite a bit during the war.”
She had. Everyone spent a few nights with a bottle as a companion. It was a safer bet than keeping company with someone warm. Never knew when they’d go cold. As soon as the battles were over and everyone returned home she’d sworn off drinking. It tore patches in her memory. She’d forgotten nights, forgotten faces of those she loved leaving her with the images of their dead faces. She didn’t like those images.
“I’ll do my best to keep them at bay, but I’m thirsty and your mouth is so dry.”
“No, I refuse to go out. I can’t let anyone see me drinking. I promised myself I wouldn’t. I can’t break that promise.”
Her hand fell off the velvet green dress.
A million thoughts swirled through her. “A compromise then, we don’t let anyone see us.”
The route to the liquor store flashed in her mind. The back entrance, how the store was laid out. Imported liquor in the back left corner behind the expensive wine, things almost no one in the village went for.
Her hands went for a black turtleneck and emerald joggers. Casual enough to blend in, and dark enough to keep from being noticed. A coat with a hood was pulled on just as quick as the clothes—she wasn’t sure if she was even dressing herself—that was a disgusting feeling. Imagining his fingers pulling the clothes onto her body, feeling the warmth of her skin. A pair of running shoes came next and she was out the door before she could blink.
The air had cooled only enough to remind people that fall was coming. Summer very much still lent his heat to the land of fire.
Streetlamps flickered as the last rays of sunlight disappeared under the hills that surrounded the village. People walked about, some giving her a soft wave as she jogged by.
“See? No one suspects a woman going for a nightly run.”
She was running of her own free will. What was she thinking, that she could outrun the man inside her head? No, that wasn’t possible. But maybe there was a way—
“I don’t like where this train of thought is going my dear. Let’s find a new station to arrive at.” Her body flew upward, she didn’t notice the chakra pooling in her legs before the jump. Her steps were silent atop the roofs she lept between. She was careful to avoid the passing people of guard duty. The war was over but paranoia was never ending. The village was closely watched without the knowledge of many—but it helped them feel safe. They didn’t know it was there but they felt the effects of its comfort.
“Much like I to you. All those nights you spent crying and thinking to yourself. You thought you were strong, handling it all on your own. But I was there to wipe your tears and kiss tender words to your heart. I picked you up my dear, I will make you great—you’ll live up to my name as my killer.”
She threw up.
“Goodness you’re disgusting at times, Doll. Aim for a flower pot next time, maybe you’ll fertilize it.”
She dropped just outside a liquor store, its sign blinking Open . She tightened the strings of her hoodie, or he did, she wanted it done, and stepped inside. Without looking up her body navigated to the corner where a handful of dusty bottles sat.
“Dust is almost half an inch thick—does no one recognize how wonderful this drink is? Pity them, but more for me I guess.” His voice purred in her ears. It was odd, sounding like a blend of hers and what she remembered coming out of his wooden face. They fit together like a puzzle piece, it was a nice voice. She hated it.
Three bottle necks sat between the fingers on her left hand as she fished out the cash needed to pay for them.
“Goodness, never thought I’d see the day those left my shop. Glad you’re taking them off my hands. ID please.”
They’re going to know who I am. Oh goodness, no, why are you doing this to me?
“Just watch.” She could see his grin, his eyes widening for an attack.
“I was of age for the village to send me to kill three hundred people. I think I’m of age to drink some weird important liquor that no one wants. You either accept that I’m not letting you know which PTSD-ridden hero wants to forget, or you get to restock these bottles. Now, how much do I owe you after saving this blasted place from destruction?” Hearing half a Suna accent come out of her mouth was alarming.
She looked out from underneath the hood, hoping the clerk wouldn’t care enough to push the matter further.
“Fine, you can take it. Thank you for your service, there is a group that meets—”
“I don’t need you or any other group. Just myself and the voice inside my head. I need a bag, no logo. Canvas bag would be best.” She held out a hand after setting the cash on the counter.
“Of course. You aren’t ashamed to parade around the fact you’ve bloodied up your hands, but can’t be seen getting a drink. Big shot shinobi here in my shop.”
The chakra slipped out her fingertip and tied itself to the clerk’s arm, holding it perfectly still for several moments before it started to twist .
“Gah! I’m sorry, I’m sorry, take it, just take it!” A canvas bag was shoved across the counter, along with the money. The change clattered on the flood.
She swept down to retrieve it and shoved it in the bag with the bottles.
“Have a good night.” She pushed out the doors. Sweat dripped down her spine, it wasn’t even hot in the store?
We’re going home. You can have one drink, promise me this will never happen again. With this much, you shouldn’t need to go back—
“And there’s that station again. You’re not getting rid of me that easily my dear. I’m here to stay, oh I have so much to teach you, you’ve so much to learn. We’re going to have the best of fun molding you into what you should be.”
“Sakura!” Warmth crashed into her and the scent of ramen and sweat was overwhelming. “What are you doing out so late?” Naruto’s bright eyes looked her up and down.
“I’m just out on a walk, getting some groceries in a bit, post-workout snack.” His Suna accent crept in.
Naruto’s brows furred, a weird, goofy look, overtaking him. “You’ve been watching foreign dramas again, haven’t you? You’re starting to sound like them—I know that you think Suna men are to die for, but like, Sakura, this isn’t healthy. You’ve gonna pine after a good old everyday man like me! Oh, snacks! What kind of snacks!” He lunged for the bag.
It hit her chest and she did her best to muffle the sound of glass clinking as she swatted his hand away.
She laughed, “you think that you’re an everyday man? I think you’re insane, and that’s a formal diagnosis.” She eyed the box tucked under his arm. “You should get back home, Hinata isn’t going to be happy you’re holding that cake on its side.”
The blood drained from his face, and with a step, he was out of sight. She hoped that cake was alright.
“I thought he’d never leave.”
The rest of her trip home was uninterrupted. She burst through her doorway and bolted it shut. Next were the curtains—every single one was drawn shut, no drip of outside light fell on her floor.
Remember, you get one glass—
“Stop being so whiny, you can tolerate much more than that and we both know it.”
He didn’t bother grabbing a glass from her cupboard. The top of the bottle was cut open with her hand and a long drag ran down her throat.
It burned, her stomach churned. The mascara and eyeliner mixed with tears once more and stung her eyes, she couldn’t see past the black cloud.
She pulled the bottle away from her lips, gasping for air.
It tasted like home.
~*~
“Why did you pick me?” The alcohol was thick in her system, it pulled her to the ground, far too heavy to move. She smelled dry, her mouth was dry, everything felt dry except her stomach. It sloshed every time she moved an inch closer to the bathroom toilet.
“Because you were strong enough to kill me—almost kill me. Good Grandmother gave you some pointers. I knew you had potential. Anyone who could kill me had potential. You were ripe for the picking and so I plucked you up.”
“How?” Her knee burned as it scraped from hardwood to carpet. The heel of her palms would be bruised and rubbed raw by the morning.
“I learned how to tie my life into a scroll, the principle for tying it to a person didn’t seem much different. I’ll teach you about that someday.” Images of him in flesh berated her mind. His voice coming out of her friend’s bodies, growing tissue samples from her own blood, filtering out her own essence to make his, unique DNA from hers floating about inside her didn’t mix with the whiskey.
I’d never make you a body.
“Oh, when I’m done teaching you, you’ll be begging to have a form to give a kiss of thanks.” More images assaulted her. “Oh, I agreed to shelter your mind. I’ll keep those to myself.”
~*~
The first time she found herself playing with strings of her own will was frightening. Sasori had been working through her muscles, lighting her nerves on fire as he worked as if demonstrating to a child what needed to be done. His arms felt like a sheet draped over her. It was her body, but it wasn’t her .
Muscles held memory, it was a disputed fact, but she was sure of it. Her absent mind wandered and the pencil on her desk rolled about without her hand behind it.
“See, I told you you’d be good at this. Look how naturally it comes to you. Soon you’ll be making instruments of power, little pawns. It’s perfect for a medic—keeps you out of the fray.”
Is that why you studied it?
“Goodness no,” his laugh was thick in her ears. Why was his voice getting louder? “Grandmother raised me, that was her style. Not much my parent’s—though I assume it could have been. I only knew them as much as a child knows a parent. Not a deep level like friends or lovers. They were figures in my life that provided food and warmth.” Images of a man and woman dressed in traditional Suna garb floated in. A room came next, tatami floors and sage walls, a few lights hung low over a sitting table. Salted eggs sat on a blue dish next to cream bowls of rice. A bit of pork rested in the center of the table, it was smoked and dripping with fat. And off to the side was a bright red bowl of pears. They shone in the light, her mouth started to water. Laughter filled the room as stories strung about.
It disappeared quickly as it came.
“No reason for you to go prying in places you don’t want to see.” His voice was neutral. She couldn’t tell if it was holding back emotions he didn’t want brought up to the surface, or if he truly was indifferent to the whole situation?
She turned her attention back to the chart at hand. You looked happy, why wouldn’t I want to see a happy person?
“Happy people never last in times of war.”
The chart demanded attention with that statement. While she didn’t need the help, Sasori often gave input in everything she did, though he hadn’t been working in a medical setting in over a decade.
“I’d be forty, yes, that sounds about right. But I cast aside the process of aging at twenty-one. Beautiful twenty-one. Does that make this easier, knowing I’m the same age as you?”
Just because you say you’re twenty-one doesn’t make it true. You’ve the mental capacity of a fully grown adult twenty years my senior.
The nerves around her jaw lit as if a pair of hands cupped it gently. “And you’ve lived through a war that aged you. You’ve seen so many things that no one else will see by your age. Taken more lives than I . We’re not too different. You’re old in your young body, I’m young in my old body. Not too terribly different at all.” His voice purred, she hated it.
How had he gotten so loud, how did she allow him this close to the surface?
She didn’t like this, it stuffed her brain with cotton and lit it ablaze.
His hands ran down her neck, stopping at her shoulders that knotted up at his grip.
“And of course if I were to step out of your body right now and become a man again, I’d have my perfect skin, my perfect teeth, my timber would shake your knees, everyone likes a man with experience and—”
The pencil snapped, sending graphite dust all over her charts. She took a deep breath, letting it fill her lungs, held it a moment or three, and let it out again.
She had paperwork to do.
Patient recovered well after a minor procedure. Has O2 saturation of 80%, not horrible, I’ve seen worse. Blood pressure is 130/78, a bit weird but nothing to write home about. CMC and CMB are normal, glucose is 78, they’ll need a good cup of juice. Fever is receding and—
“White blood cell count has risen in the past two hours. You glazed over that bit.”
She could feel him grinning.
It is a sign of possible infection. I should go give him a look over.
The look-over ended up with an infection and a quick bag of broad-spectrum antibiotics.
“See, I’m not so useless. You should reward me by practicing puppetry more.”
Why is that a reward for you?
“Because it feels different when you move your body to do it. When I do it I’m fighting against your nature, a problem we’ll solve eventually. But when you do it it’s like silk. Your body moves so fluidly, it is a shame puppetry isn’t taught well here. Oh, you would have excelled. Your movements are crystal, so exact whilst keeping a soft touch.”
She didn’t like the tone of his voice, how dropped it was. He sounded like a madman—he was a madman. She needed to remind herself of that more often and—
“I’ll be quite the rest of the evening if you practice.”
That’s gaslighting
“Is it working, Doll?” His voice was in the shell of her ear.
You shut up starting now.
“Won’t utter a peep unless I see something wrong. I am teaching you here, remember?”
It was hard to forget with him mentioning it constantly. It made her forget the heinous crimes he committed and made her wonder if he truly was inside of her head.
Maybe she was just crazy?
No one could know that she was slowly going insane and becoming friends with the voice inside her head.
~*~
She needed to get out of the village for a few days. Training in her home had led to more than a few pieces of furniture breaking, and more bruises than she could count. Booking a training ground was a disaster waiting to happen. Anyone could come stumbling about if they saw her name on the list and she didn’t want any prying eyes on her as she practiced the puppetry that Sasori taught her.
All she had to do was knock on the door, Tsunade would tell her to enter, she’d ask for a small mission outside the village to catch her breath and collect some herbs for the greenhouses.
“If that’s all it’s going to take, why haven’t you done it yet? We’ve been standing here for minutes on end—you’re killing me again with this.” Sasori’s voice drawled in her ears.
She hated that feeling. It took everything in her not to turn around and look for a body to match the voice to. In doing so she’d never make it out of the padded rooms kept in the basement of the hospital for cases where some Shinobi needed some extra care after missions.
Her arm flung up and rapped on the door.
“You’re welcome. ”
“Enter.” Tsunade’s voice bellowed from the other side of the door. She wasn’t in a good mood.
Sakura licked her lips and pulled the door open soft as she could before closing it after her, leaving the door open just a crack for her to make a quick escape from if things went south.
From the light flush on Tsunade’s face, things were polar.
“Ah, Sakura, what brings you in today?” Tsunade had hardly looked up from her papers, pen poised in her hand.
Take a steady breath, it’ll be fine. “I want a mission—nothing big, no worries. I don’t need the pay. I was hoping for something, in Tea? I have vacation days piling up, but I don’t feel right using them, I’d rather my ‘vacation’ be for the good of the village. There are also some herbs in Tea I wouldn’t mind grabbing for the greenhouses on the way back if possible.” Exhale. The words hadn’t tumbled out like laundry in a dryer, that was a good sign. She kept her posture as relaxed as possible.
Tsunade looked up from her papers, giving Sakura a steady lookover as she went. Her gaze narrowed around her fingers.
“You’re twitching Doll. I’ll help you out.” Numbness set it, it trailed from her shoulders to her toes. He pulled her arms up and set her hands lightly on her hips, which he cocked slightly to her right. “I’ll bring you back a few of the Tea wines you love too. I just need to get out for a bit. Flu season is coming up and I’d like a little recharge before I move into my office in the hospital—until someone kicks me out like last year.” He used her voice so fluidly.
“Ha! You really want to get out of town for a bit? Fine, be my guest. I was going to send this scroll via hawk, but I may as well save the poor bird a trip and send you instead.” Tsunade held out a scroll.
Sakura moved to take it.
Tsunade’s hand wrapped around her wrist as she gripped the scroll, “you better bring me back the good ones, purple seal, not the blue one, not the green one, purple sealed wine .”
She shook her head, the only part of her body she still had control of. “Yes, ma’am. Purple sealed wine.”
“And it’s on you.” Tsunade shook her hand away and gave another dismissal wave. “Now, take your time, I won’t need you back for a week. I’ll chart you down as such and you’ll receive a week’s pay for a D ranked mission. It won’t be much, I hope you’re alright with that.”
Sakura, or Sasori, gave a laugh. “I’ll use it to settle Naruto’s ramen bill on my tab.”
“Lords, I think you’ve forgotten what D rank pay is. Get out of here.” She turned her attention back on her paperwork, a soft smile on her face.
“See, it was no big deal. You like making a mountain out of a molehill, don’t you?”
She would elect to ignore that comment.
The fall weather was truly creeping through the streets of Konoha as she made her way back to her apartment. Street vendors were selling pomegranates and pumpkins, more than one stall had cider brewing, it was electrifying. She couldn’t wait to get to Tea and see what fall things were cooking up there.
Her legs froze. “And to train, you promised me you’d train.” His hand wrapped around her neck.
Of course.
No, this would solve everything. A little vacation was all she needed to calm her mind. She would walk out the village gates, take her time getting to Tea where she would relax and the voice inside her head would finally melt away in a hot spring. A vacation was all she needed to melt the terror and stress away. She needed alone time.
She had to be alone.
~*~
Her head felt free the moment she stepped past the village gates. She’d entrusted the key to her apartment to Ino, who promised to take care of her plants and rade her stash of face masks, which—in her words—she never fully appreciated. A fair note. She enjoyed them for the fun they gave and the perfumes. She didn’t need outside influence on her skincare when the chakra circling her system kept her running at peak efficiency.
The midday weather was perfect. Cicadas still buzzed about in the trees that were just starting to change into the fiery colors that Leaf was known for. The sun shot down through the canopy space, covering the forest floor in molten gold. And the crisp air around her brought back memories of days when she didn’t have a care on her shoulders.
She needed this. The stress had been building far too great and this was exactly what would fix that problem. But, soon as she got back she would organize a girl’s night. Solidify the feeling.
The scroll tucked was deep into her bag under piles of clothes for relaxing in: a silk robe, silk pajamas, a flannel in case she got cold, and two face masks she actually wanted to use up.
The odd chuunin ran past her now and again—always making sure to bow to her for whatever reason as they went. She wouldn’t complain though, it was nice seeing their chubby faces out and about without a care in the world. Those were cherished days in her mind, spent pining over Sasuke and tending to her hair.
That was a name she hadn’t thought of in quite some time.
I wonder how he’s doing?
He’d fought alongside herself and Naruto in the end, repented for his sins against the village, and was now wandering the same roads as her to make the world a better place. Naruto would join him on the odd occasion when both of their schedules lined up. She was happy for him. He smiled, and that was such a sight. Of course, they were almost never directed at her, they didn’t interact enough for her to earn a smile.
That was alright.
After dating a few weeks they’d called it off—too much trauma wrapped into everything about them. They’d stayed friends, he still wrote her every blue moon asking for some odd piece of medical advice. She was happy he trusted her as a friend, and that was enough in her heart. That was all she wanted.
She dated Shikamaru for a good while, it was an adventure. They’d worked really well together, but not as well as he had hoped. They too remained friends, meeting and speaking far more often than she did with Sasuke. Sparing was a favorite pastime between them being that their fighting styles were so different. But one could only fight so long before the memories broke through the surface with nicks and scrambled earth beneath their feet. The only difference coming in that he had someone to hold onto when it all got to be too much. She didn’t have anyone.
Don’t get so wrapped up in memories, we’re on vacation Sakura—or will be as soon as this scroll leaves our hands.
She broke into a sprint, taking to the trees on the side of the path.
Vacation was calling and she was desperate to answer.
~*~
The scroll had been delivered and everything was right as rain in the land of Tea. The inn Sakura booked herself into had a public hot spring—but even better, rooms with private springs.
I don’t spend much anyway, why not treat myself to some nice alone time.
The room itself wasn’t anything too special, tatami floors, a small fridge in the corner, which she quickly threw her face masks into, a kneeling table, and a sliding door leading to the fenced-in patio that housed the private spring.
Shedding her travel clothes she stepped into the small bathroom and let the shower run, washing the forest off of her was a must before dinner.
Scratching shampoo into her scalp was a feeling she hadn’t missed like this. Showers at home were usually quick and unceremonious. She simply washed and got out. But a shower after running for hours was a divine feeling. Looking at the mirror in the bathroom, she definitely needed it. Mud ran down her shoulders from her hair, or was it from her fingers? Either way, it was down the drain.
As much as I miss this feeling, maybe I didn’t miss being covered in dirt?
Laughter broke free of her lungs. “When was the last time I stood in front of a mirror without feeling crazy?” She poked at her reflection. “Afraid of a dead man? Me? Never .” Her laughter continued as she finished washing and dressed in a light robe and sweatpants. Not the most glamorous combination, but fitting enough for dinner.
Her stomach growled as she checked her watch, seven o’clock. Dinner time.
Her mind was buzzing as she made her way from her small room to the dining area. She was going to stuff herself and then soak the night away.
The halls were beautiful as she wandered closer to the front desk. Art hung in a few places, vases filled with flowers and branches. A few tea sets sat under a glass case with tags for purchase.
Oh, that’s pretty.
A cream-colored pot sat with four matching cups, covered in little lotus and cherry blossoms. The price was less so, but perhaps it wasn’t preposterous enough to think of it as a gift for herself? She would consider it over dinner.
The room was long, tables flooded the area and voices filled the air.
Spread along the tables were bowls upon bowls of food, steaming, some sizzling. Steaks, noodles, rice, dumplings,
Oh yes, this was the right place to stay indeed.
She seated herself at an empty table and set about ordering. Once the food was set before her she wasted no time in digging in. The flavors coated her tongue and slid down her throat.
Oh, I’m so happy I wore stretchy pants.
Quickly the emptiness in both her stomach and the table was gone. A young man sat down across from her, a head of brown hair that was slightly dripping into his eyes, a pretty green color—mosier than her own. His yukata was one the inn provided, and she couldn’t help wondering if he wore anything under it with his bare chest peeking out.
“Hello.” She said, and set to wiping her mouth and taking a sip of water.
He grinned, “hello indeed.” His voice was deep and smooth. Perhaps she wouldn’t be soaking alone tonight?
“Please,” she gestured to the food on the table, “help yourself.”
“I wouldn’t mind helping myself whatsoever.”
Heat crept up behind her ears. She could feel how wide her eyes were, she tried blinking to restore them to a normal state, and after a few blinks, it might have worked. “Alrighty then.”
“My name is Akechi, what’s yours?”
“I’m,” she faltered a moment, thinking if it was a wise idea to give her real name, “Sakura.” She was known for beating men into the ground with less than humble intentions, maybe her reputation wasn’t a bad thing here.
“Lovely name for a lovely lady. Where are you from?”
Reputations get you nowhere if people don’t know who you are.
“I’m from Konoha. I work in the medical field, but I’m out on a mission slash vacation at the moment.”
“I have friends in the village, that’s awesome.” He leaned back a bit and took a few bites of food. “What are you looking to do here in Tea? We have a handful of things to do in the area, sights, sounds,” he locked his gaze on her, “people?”
“So you’re here in tea?” She asked. Her teacup was hot in her hands, but she needed the distraction.
“I am here, I am there every now and again, but yes I am here in Tea for a short while. Too short to miss out on. What do you say?”
She sighed, taking a quick look about the room. “No offense if this is the case, that sounds pretty rehearsed to me.”
“Is that a problem if it is?” His grin never faltered.
She took a moment to think about it. “Not terribly.” She tried remembering the last time that she’d been bold and relaxed this much.
She and Sasuke had only been together a handful of weeks and he was a surprisingly traditional man. Shikamaru she got a bit handsy with, but again, nothing terribly bold from either of them. She remembered how he took a long pause when his hand grazed under her wrappings— “You don’t have an aversion to scars do you?” Her voice was borderline timid. She really hoped he wasn’t. Shinobi took scars like champs . Some wounds could be healed seamlessly. With others, the main worry is not dying, so scaring is pushed to the back of the mind until it’s visible and one realizes how pretty their stomach looked before someone shot a metal string through their middle.
“I don’t think a few cuts and bruises could scare me off.”
“And if it’s more than a few cuts and bruises?”
“Well then, I guess I just have to see this for myself.”
~*~
Her skin was on fire, his hands trailed up and down the outside of her robe as his mouth explored her neck, taking small nibbles every time he found a spot that intrigued him. The tatami floor was rough on her back, she rolled him over onto the sleeping mat, a much more comfortable place to kiss a stranger.
“Goodness, you’re strong.” He breathed. His hands traced the muscles of her core, she was proud of her abs, it wasn’t easy keeping them even if they were hidden under a little bit of bloating.
“Thank you, you’re pretty tough feeling yourself.” She grinned and kissed him once more.
“So, why don’t we take a look at these scars you’re so scared of?” He grinned and rolled them once more so he straddled her waist. Then he found the tie of her robe and lose it, his hands brushed the robe from her shoulders and let it pool on the ground beneath her. “Oh, gods.”
She felt his stomach lurch as he bent over to unstraddle her.
“What?” She sat up.
He blinked a few times, covering his mouth with his hand. “I’m—I’m sorry I reacted like that, I wasn’t excepting you to be so. . .” He trailed off before snapping his gaze to hers. “No, that’s not what I meant, it’s fine.”
She stood and pulled her robe tightly around herself. “I think you should leave.” She whispered. Akechi said nothing as he slowly left the room.
“Well, that was a disappointment. But there’s always the spring I booked.” She threw her robe to the floor along with the rest of her clothes.
Grabbing one of the sheet masks from the fridge she marched outside, not minding the sulfur in the air, and plunged herself into the small spring.
The water washed all traces of the man off of her, and coddled her. Breaking the surface she leaned her head back against the lip of the spring.
“I don’t need men who are afraid of a few scars. . . Who am I kidding, I hate looking at them myself.” Nevertheless, she braved a look down at her stomach.
The scar was ugly against her skin, twisted and jagged, looking as if some creature came up and took a bite out of her.
No, not some creature. Sasori. Blasted jerk.
She didn’t want to waste more thinking on the man who was a pile of scrap wood that had been burned ages ago. Thanks to him her body was broken in so many ways, her mind was fractured—but no longer. No, he wouldn’t haunt her, he wouldn’t touch her. Her mind was her own and she wasn’t giving another thought to the man.
She sank into the waters again, massaging her scalp and resting a moment in the warmth.
And then her fingers tingled, and it spread up her arms, and then her legs.
She opened her eyes, the water only stinging slightly, there shouldn’t be anything in the water causing her skin to react in such a way. She blew out her breath and moved to straighten.
Her spine wouldn’t listen.
“So ungrateful.”
She couldn’t breathe. She needed air.
The sides of her vision started bleeding black.
“I can’t believe the slander I’ve been through the past several hours. Pretending like I don’t exist? Letting a man rake his hands all over you, and then balk at the scars I’ve given you? These scars made you great. I’m making you great. And you have the audacity to hate them!” her body shot up, her lungs heaved as water ran from her mouth.
“I made you with my tqo hands, I made you into the woman you are today. You think I’m not here? That I can’t touch you? My hands are so ready to build you up, Sakura. But don’t forget this bit. My hands can break you down.”
Her fingers dug into her middle, piercing past flesh until they met her ribs, she started to scream—her mouth sealed shut, her jaw locked as her arms started pulling flesh from her ribs.
Blood pooled down her middle into the spring water, turning it a sick shade of pink. She could taste it, the blood in her mouth mixed with the sulfur in the air. She needed to vomit. Her stomach didn’t have anything to press against as it sagged outside her ribs.
She watched in horror as her ribs were further exposed to the air, veiled by thin layers of muscle and fascia.
“I broke you once. But trust that I’ll build you back better. ”
Chakra flooded to her hands as they slowly laid her skin back over her ribs, sealing the wound shut. Relief flooded her as he made good use of her hands in creating a seamless line, as if the wound simply never existed.
“Don’t doubt me again, Sakura. Maybe this isn’t working right? Maybe, just maybe we need a more physical reminder of my presence.”
Tears poured again. “No, no, I’m sorry, I’m stressed I’m—”
His voice sang from her throat. “I don’t care. Oh, it’s a good thing you asked for some time off because we’re going on a little trip and you, little girl, are going to listen to me because there is so much we need to do to fix you.”
Pictures of caves and lodges came to her, of long nights spent over texts and scrolls, and of carving a wooden body with soft hands.
“I think it’s time I woke up again, don’t you?”
~*~
He’d shoved her so far down in her mind. She drifted between thoughts and memories. Forgotten ideas and stories came rushing back with no one to share them with.
The wounds had lightly scarred, but they were still there despite how cleanly the wounds had been sealed the night before. Sakura wasn’t sure why Sasori had gotten the wound to scar, but there it stood, a white ribbon dancing along her ribs.
Where are we going?
“We’re going north a few days, south a day, west, east. Wherever I see fit until I find what I’m looking for.”
That didn’t answer any of her questions. Sakura couldn’t find a way to access Sasori’s thoughts. She never had an interest in them before, desire wandering into a few odd memories. But now that she dug for them they were nowhere to be found. He’d hidden them behind a impentratiable wall inside her own mind. She very much hated that thought. His mind being tucked away inside hers, so snuggly and tight.
What was even worse was him digging through her memories. Bringing up vision after vision of medical procedures she’d learned about, times she’d been with her friends and a few lovers. He loved picking apart the different strategy games she’d played with Shikamaru, criticizing both of their choices in piece movement. She never had a moment of rest, he was constantly making noise inside of her head. She wanted quiet, all she wanted was for silence !
“Goodness, someone is in a bad mood today. How about this, I’ll give you a little surprise. Something to make up for the other day?”
She didn’t have the chance to reply as the world went dark.
~*~
It was warm. Warm and wet. Something splashed against her skin and lulled her muscles into relaxing. Sage wafted about with something that belonged to the mint family. She sank lower into whatever it was, water lapping at her chin and lower lip.
“Here, have a nice little reward. I’ll even be quiet for a few minutes. Enjoy.”
Her eyes snapped open. She didn’t recognize where she was. Sand stretched as far as the eye could see, encasing her within a small oasis. Her spine pressed against a tree trunk that sat at the edge of the surface. Her clothes sat folded a few feet back, along with several bags she didn’t remember packing—or buying for that matter.
She started forming a question in her mind as she processed his words. He’d given her a few minutes to herself. She couldn’t feel him inside her head. Correction, she could tell he was there, resigned and curled up in a dark corner. He wasn’t paying her any heed. Sasori’s body was disconnected from her own in a sense, it was there, of that there was no question. The connection was weak, faltering only a moment of a moment.
It gave her an idea.
She formed a small boundary like she would to protect against a genjutsu—not tall enough to cover him, but enough that her thoughts needed to be loud to reach him, theoretically at least. She whispered his name a few times over in her mind, steadily getting louder until she could feel her thoughts floating over the small wall and into the space he had crawled into.
“What do you want, little girl? I thought you wanted the moments of rest?”
Where are we? How long have I been out?
“A few days tops, and if you can’t figure out where we are then I’ve much more work to do than I imagined.” He scoffed and turned back into himself. The glimpse she got of his face looked worn, haggard. Perhaps it wasn’t just him giving her a break, he was getting one for himself. That was good, all of this was good.
I need to find his heart. If we’re in Suna then it shouldn’t be too hard to find some landmarks and make my way back to that cave. I doubt anyone touched it, Chyio and I left it in pretty bad shape. He has to be clinging to this world by something other than me—something has to be keeping him here and I’ll die before I let him nab someone’s body.
She washed up in the pool of water, surprised at how dirty she was—and then hunger set in. Sasori hadn’t done a very good job taking care of her body. She could feel the acid in her stomach eating away at the lining, her body destroying stored up fat and some muscle for energy. She would punch Sasori if she had the ability. This was no way to care for the body he sought to build up into something ‘great’.
Rummaging through her bag she found a few protein bars and a drink powder. Filling her bottle with water from the spring, not at all thinking about how she just washed off in it, she added the flavored powder and downed it before refilling it again. The packet claimed to be strawberry, whoever made the drink had never even seen one before as it tasted like the sand that surrounded her.
She inhaled one of the protein bars and sank into the spring again to keep her body from freaking out about the sudden ingestion. She squeezed her thumbs to calm her gag reflex, wincing as her fingernails dug into her palms.
Couldn’t even trim my nails for me? Such a parasite.
She prayed he hadn’t heard that one.
The sun started to climb towards the horizon as she dried herself off. Dumping out her shampoo and conditioner she filled the bottles with water from the spring, those she could forgo, body wash was a necessity for keeping any possible cuts clean, and her scent to a minimum. After doing a few final checks she headed West. She’d find some sort of landmark tower somewhere, she had to.
Sasori still hadn’t budged from his spot behind the wall. Sakura wondered if it blocked him out from all general thoughts, like what she was doing, the fact that she was leaving the spring. She hoped he’d stay dormant for a good long while.
*Bang, bang, bang*
It lasted a day.
Sasori’s fists banged on the wall in her mind.
“What are you doing!” His face was twisted, his aura bled malice.
Sakura gave no response, only watching as he screamed and tried climbing out of the case she’d put him in, now fully enclosed on all sides in her mind.
The threats continued for three days, the constant activity in her mind keeping her up the entire time. Which she didn’t mind, Sakura wasn’t sure she’d want to sleep with him in such an enraged state and not knowing if the barrier would fall if her mind went dormant.
Her body was breaking down from exhaustion as she stumbled into the mouth of the cave where his pupper body lay hidden in the rubble and dust.
The air was fresh, blood coated the rocks and iron sand spread out in a thin layer. The scene was exactly as Sakura and Chiyo had left it. The pupper body they had killed Sasori in was taken to Suna and was burned and buried. The first one he fought her in was still here, buried.
She started digging.
“Why did you cut me off—I can’t see you, I can’t see where we are, what are you doing!”
You said you wanted your body back, right?
She gave him a small glimpse of the cave. His face froze as he took in the site of his grave.
“All my puppets are gone, where are my puppets? There’s no way that they would have broken down to nothing this fast.” She closed him off again.
I think Kankuro came through and gathered them all up. Fixed up the ones he wanted, and scrapped the others for parts—at least that’s what I’ve heard. He wanted to keep your body as well, but the council wasn’t about to let that happen. He was the only one who cried at your funeral and burial. A true puppetry fan that one is. You should feel blessed.
“Little brat might have had good tastes, but his form was terrible.”
She didn’t like the way Sasori was brewing. He sat back on his heels, fingers drumming together, brows knit in concentration.
“You did very good at silencing me this long. I am impressed.”
Thanks for the compliment. Maybe you won’t feel too bad about dying before your mission is completed.
She smiled as she found a red tuft buried under a huge boulder. Sakura slid down against it, downing another water bottle once she was seated. She would need a good bit of strength to lift this. She gave herself five minutes and a few sticks of dried meat she’d picked up on the way here before setting about lifting it.
Her fingers popped under the weight of it, but her hold didn’t lessen. She gripped harder, pouring as much chakra into it as she could without passing out from exhaustion.
It rolled off of the body, which had been thoroughly crushed, but not shattered into a million tiny pieces as she’d feared.
It’s time you left me alone, puppet boy.
Scooping up the pieces into a pile on the ground without getting a splinter was a good sign.
She shoved a hand into her bag and pulled out a small bottle of lighter fluid. Unscrewing the cap was a challenge as black threaded her vision. Popping it free the fumed assaulted her, snapping her awake.
Any last words?
He stayed silent. Only watching her with his brown eyes. They looked tired. Sakura wondered for a moment how long it had been since Sasori felt human. Was he able to feel any shred of humanity as he walked about in her body? She hoped he had—life in Suna during his time didn’t leave anyone with a scrap of it. It was a miserable existence and maybe he got to experience something good in the time he spent in her body. A warm breeze, a nice snack and drink. What it felt like to be kissed. She hoped he got to experience all the things that were ripped from his hands when a blade was set in his palm.
Goodbye, Sasori.
She lit a match and watched as it consumed his body.
The varnish crackled and popped off of the grains, the hair melted down before disintegrating into nothing. The sun set with the fire, having consumed all of his being.
Sasori was gone from her mind. The space he occupied was empty and cold. Why was it cold? Could he have been warm? She didn’t like that thought, she’d snuffed his warmth.
It was for the safety of everyone, and myself. There’s no feeling bad for killing a killer.
Waves of nausea slammed into her stomach and back like a punch from Tsunade. A laugh escaped her lips. Tsunade would be so mad when she came back home—but goodness did she have a story to tell!
She set about putting up a tent and building another small fire, one not composed of puppet parts, and boiled some ramen and eggs, another thing she’d picked up on her travels.
With a full stomach and a warm sleeping bag, Sakura curled up into a tiny little ball, shed a few tears for all the lives lost at childhood but lived on as steel, and went to sleep.
~*~
The world around her was cold. Water dripped against metal. The air tasted rotten. She tried turning over onto her other side in an attempt to get more comfortable and catch a few more hours of sleep before starting her journey back to Konoha.
“It’s time to wake up.”
“Five more minutes.”
Her eyes snapped open.
“You thought you were so clever.”
What are you doing here?
His eyes burned down at her as he stood atop her consciousness. His ghastly fingers dug into her mind, trying to rip her apart. She tried shoving him back and building up her barrier, but he was too strong, too in control
“I will make you great, don’t you forget this. I thought you could understand that what I was doing was just and good . But it seems that you’ve much to learn. And so I’ve come up with a better plan. New and improved! ”
Her body lurched to a sitting position, eyes peeled open wide as she took in the room.
Everything was made of metal, there wasn’t a shred of warmth anywhere. The lights flickered and buzzed . The door was solid looking, hardly a seam in the wall to give away it’s presence.
A pod filled with a greenish liquid sat in the middle of the far wall.
Her body slunk off the table, her feet felt numb as they walked barefoot across the cold ground. She couldn’t turn her head to see where her shoes were, she could tell she was wearing clothes, at least there was that.
The temperature in the room plummeted as she got closer to the pod. A strange silhouette in the center of it bobbed about.
“What is that?”
“That, my lovely Sakura, is your salvation!” His eyes widened in a crazed glee, his voice cracking.
She pressed her nose up against the pod, she threw up against the glass.
It was his body floating about, perfect, pristine. It didn’t show any signs of aging or decay as it floated there.
“A fail safe incase anyone ever managed to kill my puppet self. I didn’t go through all the trouble of making those bodies for some freak to ruin it all. It was stupid of Suna, or anyone, to think that I woudln’t have a fail safe. My plan wouldn’t have been perfect without it. Wood rots and breaks down, and can be easily shattered if one applies enough force.”
Her body punched in a code to a keypad attached to a machine on the pods left. The glass on her nose warmed and the liquid slowly started draining, only to be replaced with red. Blood . It was thick as it ran down the sides of the glass wall, obscuring Sasori’s human body from her vision.
We found your other hideouts, how did we miss this one!
“Because I hid it in the heart of Suna. No one ever looks under their nose for skeletons. It was a part of my old lab when I worked for them. Chiyo worked here too, once. I built this room myself though, no one knew it existed. Not even the old hag.”
She threw up on the glass when the pod gurgled as the last few liters filled it.
“Disgusting. You’re cleaning that up once this is over.”
She pressed down her thoughts, trying to build a plan.
He was planning on returning to his original body. All she had to do was give in until then. She would have the upper hand in a fight. Sasori only experienced a shred of humanity when he was in her body. Returning to his own was sure to be a shock for his system. A swift punch to the skull would be all it took to end this nightmare.
She relaxed her guard, giving him better movement.
“Giving up already?”
I know when a fight is lost. I can only hope whatever it is that you plan on teaching me is good.
“It will be, trust me. I only have your best interests at heart.”
Her body moved away from the pod and stench of blood and bile. A few drawers revealed some clean clothes, a style that was slightly outdated for Suna fashion, but not by much. Fashion hadn’t evolved much since the war.
“I’ll have to buy some new clothes, you’ll help me with that.”
Yes, I’m sure going shopping will be a fun lesson. She shot back at him.
He smirked.
Sakura couldn’t wait for him to be outside of her head. She struggled at holding the visions of her plan at bay. There was no telling what he would do if he found out.
The pod beeped loudly, startling her.
“Time to wake up. ”
“I hope you’ve been having sweet dreams in there.” She strode over to the pod and punched in another code, which drained the blood much faster than the green fluid had. A metal claw held his body upright from his middle, his legs stretching down to the bottom of the floor, his arms limp at his sides. A spray of water washed down the body and the glass door flew upward. The disgusting air of the pod filled the room. If she hadn’t already emptied her stomach, she would have now. It mixed with the perfumed water that had rinsed his body off.
“You’ll also be washing me.”
She bit back a response. She would wash him alright, in a bath of kerosene.
“This part is important. This jutsu allows me to transfer my soul between bodies. Don’t think about memorizing it, you wouldn’t be able to complete the seal anyways.” Every attempt she made to look down at her hands was blocked, Sasori managed to cut off all her own nerve sensations to her body, just as she had done to him. It was terrifying to be so cut off from her body. But it wouldn’t last for long. That was all she could give herself.
“There, it’s all done.” Her voice felt free as it flew through the air like a spring bird. “How do I look?” She opened her eyes to see soft, brown eyes filled with tears look back at her.
“I’m going to kill you now.” She raised a fist and darkness threatened to overtake her once again. Her body slumped forward.
“I wouldn’t do that, your body isn’t used to this yet. Try to be calm.” Her voice reassured her.
That wasn’t right.
She looked up from her slumped position to see her body setting down a small gold mirror before reaching a hand down to pull her back up to her feet.
“Like I said, this body hasn’t been used in several years. It’ll take some getting used to, but with our combined knowledge, we’ll get a good rehab plan for it and you’ll be punching mountains before you know it!” Her fists pumped in a cheering movement.
“What—what did you do?” Her voice was deep, raspy, with a thick Suna accent.
“You didn’t think I was just going to let you kill me did you? And no, I wasn’t able to gather that from your mind, it was obvious what would happen if I put my mind back into my body.” She smiled as she lifted Sakura, Sasori’s body, onto the cold lab table and began wiping it down with some damp cloth. “Once you’ve proven yourself worthy, you can get your body back. Until then, you wouldn’t risk killing Naruto’s best friend would you?” He tilted her head to the side with a bright smile and flush filling her cheeks.
Sobs overtook her.
“Oh come now, it’s not so bad. This body remembers puppetry, you’ve got the advantage there. It’ll be easier to learn this way. And considering everyone thinks I’m dead, it won’t be a problem bringing me back to Konoha as some mute guy you met on your travels.”
“But I’m not—”
A hand swiftly hit her throat, snapping her vocal chords. Pain was quickly numbed by the same hands.
“Well you are now. Don’t worry, I haven’t severed our mental link, we can still hear each other’s thoughts and even feel each other still. And I’ve learned. Neither of us can hide anything from each other.” Sasori locked his green eyes on her. “I can’t keep any secrets from you, and you can’t hide anything from me ever again. It’s wonderful!” She giggled.
She wanted to die. There was chakara in this body, she gathered it up around her brain and was ready to cut her spinal cord when it dissipated.
“Now that’s not nice.” Her voice was cold.
“What have you done?”
“I’ve still got enough control in your mind to keep you from hurting yourself. Wouldn’t do you any good to leave me alive in your body would it?”
The thought shocked her, if she died, Sasori would be free to roam about in her body, as her. He could do anything he wanted to in her body.
“Oh don’t be having thoughts like that. I live only for you, Sakura. Don’t forget it. But you’ll need a new name. Let’s dig through your thoughts and find a good once—Haku! I like that name You’re Haku now. My Haku. My master, that’s what your name means you know? Silly isn’t it? I think I do see you as my master. I live only to serve you, to make you better than you could ever dream of being. I love you, Haku.”
He leaned forward and pressed a kiss against her lips, her lips were soft, she hated that. She tried blocking it out, and succeeded, for the most part.
“I think we can come up with a great story for why I’ve brought you back. We are in love. It’s a great idea! Maybe it’s because I’m technically in a woman’s mind, but the concept of love has never sounded so good to me before. I like it, these hormones are pleasant. Do you feel them? Wait, I can tell for myself—oh, you don’t yet.” His face looked disappointed, a face she had made often. It was disturbing to see what her crushed face looked like. “Maybe someday, just like with my teachings, you’ll come to love this too.”
Tears started flowing down her cheeks, sobs threatening to break free of her throat.
“Don’t worry, Sakura—Haku. I’m going to make you great. ”