Chapter Text
Jerking off a coworker wasn't in your job description but that didn't stop you from getting the assignment.
The subject was notoriously difficult to work with and generally crude and offensive.
Frankly? He was a giant pain in the ass.
But you had a job to do. You and the other bastards who they'd roped into this. Mostly unpaid interns and people who had been demoted.
You had the 'honor' of being requested specifically.
You had no idea why. Probably a sick prank from one of the HR reps. They'd had it in for you ever since you'd reported Steven in the cloning labs for having some... Encounters with some of the clones.
In the middle of the break room.
During lunch.
In front of a wall-sized window.
On family visiting day.
Even they couldn't ignore that pr and memory wipe nightmare.
You reported for duty and were immediately ushered into a room.
"Welcome collection team." An Easter island fellow was in charge, addressing the lot of you, "I'm Andrew and I'll be your trainer for this exercise."
"We need a trainer?" Asked one of the guys, "I mean how hard can it be? It's just-" he mimicked a wanking motion eliciting a mixture of chuckles and groans from the group.
"There's style and finesse to it." An older fellow in the back said, "Bit more than just a quick wank."
"Harvey is right. So, let's watch a training video!" Andrew said it with as much false cheer as possible.
"Do we have to?"
"For legal reasons, yes. Yes, you do."
What came next was the longest hour of your life.
A demonstrational video which Played out as part giant mushroom sex Ed and part softcore porn.
Complete with tips, hand motions, suggested approaches, And warnings about the nature of the fluid you'd be handling which could have a wide range of effects such as hallucinations due to containing psilocybin. It varied based on exposure and amount of ingestion but it was absolutely possible to end up tripping if you were exposed. You didn’t question why anyone would have ended up INGESTING this on the job. This place was full of people who made dubious life choices.
He was safe enough in the office. You'd even seen him touch his coworkers.
But the... Amounts you would be working with were significantly more than average.
Great.
Fantastic.
Dangerous, weird, and absolutely an HR violation...
Or it would be if you weren't forced to sign an agreement with a laser sight trained on you.
After that was done you were given a hazmat suit.
You'd been told it was primarily a safety precaution because of the amount of fluids you'd be handling.
It still felt weird climbing into what, for the purposes of this event, was basically a body-sized condom.
You weren't a prude, far from it, but working at this place meant learning about a Lot of Weird Sex Stuff.
And not weird sex stuff you particularly wanted to know.
You had been down to learn about horny aliens and weird sex gadgets but you really didn't need to know everywhere JFK stuck his dick in the white house.
The answer was literally everywhere. There was not a single JFK dong-free area in the building.
You felt like you wanted to bathe in hand sanitizer after finding that out.
Kinda felt like that right now too.
You followed the rest of your team through the corridors until you reached the resting quarters of the subject.
Myc.
The door opened to reveal him already in his tank. It was a basic glass cylinder with ports around the base for his tendrils to stick out through.
"'Bout time you guys showed up. I have a massive case of blue balls after that last session." He shook his head, "Some people just have weak stomachs."
You glanced at Harvey and he chuckled, "Fella didn't realize what he was getting into. Missed the training video."
"Oh…"
"Alright," Harv nodded to you, "You and me on prep.
"Prep?" You echoed.
"This is a two part exercise." He replied, "First we-"
"First two of you warm me up and when I'm good and ready the rest jump in so Cognito can get as much of my sweet, sweet juice as possible."
Was he going to talk this much through the whole thing?
He leaned towards you, "Yeah, I'm a talker."
Great…
Harv took up position on one side of the tank, gesturing for you to go to the other.
God… why did you have to be on the warm up part of the team?
"Don't be shy, they don't bite."
A blue tentacle was extended to you through one of the portholes.
Reaching out, you took it in hand, trying to think of the training video suggestions.
As your hand closed around it you felt a shiver run through the appendage.
A reminder that this was not only attached to a living, sentient creature but also that you were functionally handling its dick.
Well... Best to get started.
Harvey was apparently a pro at this. You watched him masterfully executing the moves shown in the vid.
Okay well...
You ran your hand along the... tentacle? Stem? Trying not to think about the nature of what you were doing
This was no different than harvesting a crop or milking a cow-
Except cows didn't moan sexually while being milked.
"That's it... Fuck yeah."
Oh god... He was going to talk during this too?!
"Hey Harv, little faster?"
"Sure."
"Ohhhhh yes, perfect."
You tried mimicking Harvey’s movements. It was a bit more complicated than you expected. Then again you hadn't entirely factored in the combo of gloves and lube being an issue.
This would be a lot easier if you could just use your hands.
It kept slipping loose and you almost thought it was on purpose. You wouldn't put it past Myc to pull some shit like that. You'd heard stories. Everyone had.
"Hey, new kid, if you can't keep a hold on it then call in a replacement!" The bulb that functioned as his head turned to you.
You could see some of your fellows chuckling at your error.
Well... Like fuck were you going to bow out now. You'd never live failing to give a hand job down. You could practically hear the jokes already.
With a huff, you threw down your gloves and rolled up your sleeves.
There were some minor sounds of surprise and protest from your colleagues but you know what?
Fuck it.
This would go faster this way.
You grabbed the stem, possibly a little too roughly, and began stroking.
"Oooh ho ho someone's mad!" He teased.
You ignored him, putting your focus on milking the juices from the tentacle in your hands.
"That's hilarious. You really that worried about your reputation?"
You moved faster, trying some of the moves Harvey was doing. You were definitely more rough with him than the others but he wasn't objecting so..
"Well, well, someone likes the rough stuff. Kinky…”
You were going to strangle this mushroom.
"Doing a pretty good job strangling me already, aren't cha?"
You glared up at him through your mask.
He broke off into a moan as you sped up.
"Ohh yeah... Fuck yeah... Like that"
Stupid job, stupid Steven, stupid HR...
Stupid irritating mushroom.
You would need to disinfect yourself thoroughly after this. You didn't want this stuff on your skin any bit longer than it had to be…
He was gasping, moaning, tendril trying to twist and wriggle in your hands.
It was then that you noticed it...
Between the moans and the movement, you were horrified to realize-
You were getting turned on by this...
Oh... Oh god...
Wait-
You looked up at him, horror running through your veins.
Did he know?
Surely he would be mocking the hell out of you if he did. Right…?
"Keep it up, new kid, daddy's close."
Ugh... Daddy? Really?
You gripped the tentacle harder, giving it a twist as he was starting to cry out.
Your twist was like kinking a garden hose, you watched as the bulge of fluid build-up grew a bit. It didn't look all that different from some sort of glowing water balloon. He squirmed whining for a second then spasming.
"F-FUCK ME!"
At that you untwisted it, watching as copious amounts of fluid drained into the bucket.
He was panting... Somehow. You had no idea how breathing worked for these things.
You went back to the customary milking method. Now that it had started he would continue to leak for a while.
He leaned against the glass inside his tank, seemingly spent.
And you tried to push away how hot your mind was finding it.
Maybe he was fucking with your head? Could they do that? Could the fluid do that?
Fuck, you had no idea…
What the fuck was wrong with you?
The process took a while but thankfully the subject was quiet.
Harv told you going without gloves was against protocol but you shrugged him off. If psilocybin was the active ingredient then you doubted you'd have issues if it was just on your skin. The stuff generally needed to be ingested.
When you were finished being processed and your hazmat suit returned, you made your way to the office showers. You felt like you needed one after all that.
During lunch, you had gotten take out and we're bringing it back to your office when you nearly ran into the fucking mushroom again.
"Watch where you're going, some people are trying to walk here!" He paused.
Please don't recognize me please don't recognize me-
Shit, wait, he can read minds.
"I know you! Where do I recognize you from? Ohhhh you were on the JO squad!"
You were determined to ignore him but what he said next made you freeze in your tracks. A tentacle pressed to your brow, glowing pink.
"I'd recognize those filthy thoughts anywhere."
Fuck.
"Thaaaaat's right." He chuckled as you batted the stem away. "I've been inside your head.~ Why do you think everyone wears gloves?"
You stayed silent, glaring at him.
"What? You keep looking at me like that I'm going to take it as an invitation to a hate fuck."
"Oh fuck off."
"We can. Or fuck on. By the way," he moved to walk past you, leaning in for a moment, "Your brain and my dicks have something in common."
You looked at him, disgusted but also wondering what the fuck he mean-
"They both like denial ."
O h.
Your face flooded with heat and you swiftly walked to your office.
"Call me!~"
You sat at your desk, burying your face in your hands.
A lot of people in the office had dealt with mushroom duty. It was weird and awkward and honestly given the number of sex toys in the world? Probably unnecessary.
But it was part of working at Cognito Inc. sure you got to disappear people, meet actual cryptids, and play with tech most civilians wouldn't see released in their lifetime...
But you also had things like mushroom duty and dealing with Karen from the clone department.
And knowing the world around you was under constant surveillance.
It wasn't unusual to have interest in non-humans here. Alison from the media department had a Reptoid wife, for instance. There'd been a baby shower a few months back with an office party since her wife was expecting. You remembered something about parthenogenesis being mentioned.
But why, out of all the non-humans here, did it have to be the god damn mushroom?
Why not Mr. Mothman? He was sweet.
Or that one guy, Clawson, the reptoid in accounting.
Hell, you'd even take Sasquatch over this…
But no, no, your brain had to get the hots for a dude that didn't even have a face .
You pinched the bridge of your nose.
He was such an asshole.
You blamed the pretty colors and the tentacles. You had a soft spot for both. Him being an egotistical druggie dudebro was not your norm…
And… well… if you were being completely honest with yourself…
Fucking with his orgasm had been really satisfying.
And really hot.
"They both like denial."
You sighed, running your hands down your face.
That was probably another reason. The idea of taking him down a peg was way too alluring.
You shook your head, pushing it out of your mind to try focusing on paperwork.
This was NOT going to happen.
It was a BAD IDEA.
…
Who were you kidding? You worked for Cognito Inc.
Your life was just a long series of Bad Ideas.
Goddammit.
Next week when you got your assignment you nearly got into a fight with scheduling.
But in the end?
You lost.
Which was how you found yourself back in Myc's rooms with the rest of the team.
He leaned over toward you, "Well, well, look who it is. Didn't think we'd see you around again."
You looked up at him, "I was apparently requested ."
"Oh, gee well I wonder who could have possibly done that." He was catty about it, trying to rile you.
Don't let him get under your skin. This is a job. Get it done and go.
"So angry! Tell me, are you mad because you think I'm hot or mad because you have to share?"
You rolled your eyes, making sure the buckets were ready. The rest of the team had noticed his behavior. You heard the chuckles behind you.
Stupid fucking jackass mushroom-
"Or maybe you're just mad that I'm getting more than you.~"
Okay. That's it.
Abruptly you strode over to him, seizing one of the tentacles roughly.
He let out a low moan and tipped his head down to you.
"Fuck!" He yelped, "Not even gonna buy me dinner first?"
"You're going to behave yourself, got it?" You growled.
"Ooo roleplay! Are you supposed to be a sex cop?"
You gripped the tentacle tighter and he hissed, "Ey watch it! JR isn't going to like you milking me dry..." He leaned in, voice coy, "but I certainly will.~"
"Keep that up and I'll make sure to stop before anything gets milked." You snapped.
Myc shuddered slightly, "That a threat or a promise?"
Some of your coworkers exchanged glances and you realized just how uh... public this was.
Your heart was racing and you told yourself it was because you were angry. You definitely weren't turned on by the mushroom or his kinks-
"Hey, Harv?" He leaned towards the man, "Think you could take the rest of the crew outside? Me and new kid here need to talk "
Harv paused looking at you, "You good with that?"
Gritting your teeth, you nodded, "Sure."
After a bit of organization and a lot of curious glances, the others left.
Immediately the mushroom looked up, "Computer, lock the doors."
Then he turned to you, "You going to keep teasing me with that grip of yours?"
You hadn't realized just how tight the grip on the tentacle had become. You held it for a second or two more before releasing him.
He hissed, the edge of his cap pressed to the wall of the glass tube.
"Okay, so what do you wanna talk about?" You asked, crossing your arms.
"The elephant in the room. You," he pointed for emphasis, "Wanna fuck me ."
"What?! No, I don't!"
"Oh please, it's all you've been thinking about since the last session. Don't try to deny it."
"I absolutely will-"
A stem thrust out, wrapping around your wrist, "Yeah? Prove it. Let me read your mind directly."
"What does that mean?"
"Take off the stupid helmet."
You hesitated for a moment, then you calmed your mind and removed the helmet.
A tendril settled on your brow and you fought to keep the ideas out of your head. Garbage noise, that's what you needed-
"Crazy frog, how very millennial of you. Look, replaying a dumb song and picturing puppies isn't gonna do squat. I can see all the stuff underneath."
You pulled away and he pulled one tendril back through the port, using it to lean against the tank wall in a very smug fashion.
This mushroom had no right to be this smug.
"So, tentacles and orgasm denial huh? Not as kinky as I expected but I can work with that."
Your face burned, "Shut up, I'm just here to do my job."
"The first time? Maybe. But you came back for more.~"
Frustrated, you shot back, "I was doing my job and you had to go and make it weird ."
"Don't kid yourself. You made it weird the second you tossed off your gloves and started having freaky sex fantasies about me. I mean where I'm from, that's practically an invitation!"
Shit...
He was kind of right.
And you knew it, it had been in the training video...
"So, you wanna get freaky or not? Because I got five guys outside that could sub in instead." He paused and you saw a subtle shudder run through him, "But you're a hell of a lot better with your hands..."
"My hands?" You raised a brow, "Pretty sure Harv's better at it."
"Harv's great, don't get me wrong. He gives me exactly what I need..."
His words from last week rose up in your mind.
Denial ...
It clicked for you then and you eyed him, "But you don't want exactly what you need, do you?"
"Maybe.~"
That was the flirtiest thing this asshole had said so far.
Fuck.
Goddammit.
You were actually considering this.
Flirting and being rough had been way hotter than you expected...
Well...
Everyone got tired of this job... At least you could actually enjoy it ... Possibly.
Not to mention scratch 'get freaky with a non-human' off your bucket list.
You approached the tank, looking up at him, "How are we gonna do this?"
"What? I gotta teach you too?"
"Look, asshole," you grabbed one of the stems roughly, yanking it, "You're a six-foot-tall mushroom from the inside of the Earth, I don't know shit about how this works for you outside of jerking you off, got it?"
His response was a low, guttural moan, "Aw… fuck ... Yes. I get it."
"Good." You paused, letting him go, "Safeword is IRS."
You watched him shiver, "Yeah? Am I gonna need one?"
You seized two of the tentacles roughly, squeezing them, "I don't know, Myc, you tell me. "
"Fuck let me get out of this tank then-"
" No ." You gave the stems a hard squeeze, "Not until I tell you too."
"Weeeell someone's being really cocky- ah!!" He squirmed as you began to stroke him.
"I'm sorry , do you have a problem with that?"
"N-no..." He panted.
Spare tendrils were forcing themselves through the portholes, using the friction of the movement to-
"Excuse me?" You said, reaching over to snatch one of the offending tendrils, "Did I give you permission to jerk off?"
"No..." His voice wavered.
"So what shouldn't you be doing?"
"Jerking off."
"Good, now are you going to pull that shit again?"
His tentacles stilled, "No, Mixter."
Ohhh fuck .
Well... Time to bite the bullet and accept it.
That had been incredibly hot .
"Good." You started stroking him again, smirking at him, "You're a bit of a brat, you know that?"
"You love it." He snarked back.
You hated that he was right.
Abruptly, you let him go.
He whined, "Come oooon, it was getting good!"
You picked up a tendril, examining it.
Now, you'd watched the training vid, sure. But at some point, your eyes started to gloss over. It was an educational vid there was only so interesting it could be.
The appendage in your hand was a cornflower blue, slick, warm, and surprisingly strong.
Grabbing the tip, you looked it over.
Smooth flesh with a small slit.
You pressed it lightly, causing the slit to open more than you expected. Pale liquid beaded at the tip.
"Just gonna admire it or you gonna do something with it?"
Curious, you ran your finger along the slit.
He lit up, literally, leaning inside the tank to catch his breath.
"Well... That's interesting..." You purred.
The opening was certainly large enough to take your finger. Though you thought it best to start smaller.
You pressed inward with your pinkie.
You watched him shudder.
"Good?"
"Ohhhh fuck yes ." He sounded needy, desperate.
Fucking hell that was hot.
You slipped your pinkie inside carefully, watching as he shuddered and squirmed. It was an odd sensation. It clung to you, the insides rippling against your finger as if trying to draw it in further.
"Hm... This could be one hell of a way to prevent you from cumming."
"Ah- ah! Fuck!"
You chuckled, "So... Why don't the handjob guys do this if it's so effective?"
"T-takes longer..." He managed, "And they're shit at it."
"That so?" You looked up at him, slowly moving your pinkie in and out of the slit.
Sounding a mushroom.
This day had certainly taken a turn.
"Fuck yes..." He moaned.
Abruptly, you drew your finger away.
"God Dammit you fucking cock tease!"
You seized one of the tentacles roughly, "I'm sorry, what was that?"
"You just gonna keep jerkin’ me around?"
He sounded genuinely irritated.
You took some pride in that.
"More interesting than just being jerked off, isn't it?" You smirked.
"Fuck you."
You smirked, letting him go.
"What- "
"I think you need to learn some manners before we get that far."
"What do you-"
You made your way over to the door, looking back over your shoulder at him.
"Oh, you sick son of a bitch." His voice was filled with frustration and excitement.
You smirked, "You love it."
Opening the door you waved to Harvey, "You guys can take it from here."
With that, you strode out the door, riding high on having shown the asshole up.
Taking an early lunch, you made a trip back to your place. You had some pressing business you had to handle. Now .
Locking your door, you broke out a toy from your bedside drawer.
After all that you absolutely had to get off. You could not go around work like this.
As you fucked yourself with the toy, one hand stroking your sex, you thought about the way he'd shuddered and moaned. The way he'd immediately fallen in line when you grabbed his tentacles.
He was such a fucking jackass about it. A complete brat…
Which would make fucking up his orgasms soooo much more satisfying.
The tone in his voice when you left…
God, you wanted to hear more of that.
Fuck…
You thought of him crying out when you'd kinked his tentacle that first session and your body seized, shaking and pulsing as you came.
Oh fuck...
That was amazing.
You sighed, staring up at your ceiling.
Well… if you were going to do this then you should probably at least make some plans. You wouldn't want to be caught unprepared should the opportunity arise…
You were going to need to rummage through your bedside drawer. You had some things that might make things interesting.
When you came back from lunch you made your way to your office, coffee in hand and body at ease. On the way there you heard someone call your name. Turning you found yourself looking at Harv.
Shit… had you fucked things up?
"Hey, I have no idea what you did but we might have to add you to the team permanently." Harv said, grinning, "That took no time."
Oh...
You felt a flush of pride at that and also... Almost painfully aroused.
Goddammit. You'd just sorted this.
"Maybe… I don't know…" you said awkwardly. It was one thing to be kinky with the asshole in private but with an audience…
"Think about it. You two have chemistry. Might be just what we need."
You snorted, "Yeah, right."
"What? I've never seen him shut up that fast."
Oh…
"Guess I'd need a plaque for my office. Professional Mushroom Wrangler."
"Well the JO squad would be happy to have you."
You eyed him and he chuckled, "The Jerk Off squad. The regulars have jackets."
He tapped a patch on his shoulder emblazoned with a JO.
Oh god, you thought that had been a joke.
"We actually work with a few different creatures here."
You stared at him, "...what… why?"
"Lots of reasons, you got collection like Myc, you have some that need it or they might explode, some trying to repopulate that need assistance-"
"Okay, okay, I get the picture." You waved a hand, "I don't know if that's really my thing."
"You can be a specialist."
"... Wait you actually have those?"
He nodded, "My buddy Tina, she specializes in Sasquatch collection for repopulation purposes."
"You would think I'd stop being surprised after working here this long but what the hell ?"
He laughed, "Hey, it's an important job. We serve some vital functions here."
You looked at him, dubious. The man obviously had a passion for his job… which was questionable but admirable… you guessed.
"Think about it and get back to me." He said with a chuckle.
You did think about it… for about thirty seconds before deciding that's was just… too awkward even for you.
On that note, you made your way back to your office.
You were halfway through the finance report for the office when your door banged open.
Revealing a tall dayglo mushroom.
He pointed at you with a tentacle accusingly, "That was fuckin low ."
"Oh?" You chuckled.
"Yeah, 'Oh!' That was a fuckin cocktease and you know it!"
Getting up, you made your way past him, shutting the door and drawing the blinds. Turning to face him, you leaned in, running a hand along the slender stem that amounted to his torso, "I thought you said you liked denial."
"Fuck off!" He snapped.
You gave him a look."When and where, bitch?"
"My place, tonight." He shot back, irritated.
It was decided then…
Relaxing, you ran your hand up over the stem to the bright orb that lit up when he spoke. Then you gently brushed your fingertips along the soft gills above it.
"On one condition."
He huffed, "What?"
"You tell me what you want."
"I want to fuck , stupid!"
"Details."
"I want to come until I can't anymore, and trust me that takes a while. "
You chuckled, "I don't think you're telling me everything you want…"
"Oh? Like what? My secret nurse kink?" He gestured sarcastically and you seized the tendril roughly.
"I meant what you want from me ."
There was a pause and he huffed, "I want you to boss me around, play rough, there, you happy?"
You gentled a bit, running your fingers along his stem in what you hoped was a soothing motion, "Yeah, actually. Are you?"
"Happy about being bossed around and given a case of blue balls?" He asked bitterly.
"Myc."
He paused. You hadn't really said his name much. It was usually insults when you had interacted.
"Seriously, are you okay with this?"
"If you let me get off? Yeah."
You weren't sure how, maybe it was a shift in posture or the dulled edge of his tone, but you believed him.
You chuckled, "I promise, it'll be worth the wait."
He shuddered with your words, "I'm holding you to that."
Playfully, you grazed your thumb over the slit at the end of the tendril.
He shivered and pulled the tendril back from you, "You really going to pull more of that shit?"
With a smirk, you shrugged, "You seem to like it."
"You're right and it upsets me."
You laughed then paused, realizing the time, "Oh fuck. I have a meeting to get to."
"... The workplace safety review?"
"... Yeeeees?"
Wait…
The meeting was mandatory for all staff. You were taken in groups by shift and as luck would have it the mushroom was sitting across from you.
The meeting was boring by Cognito standards. Funny, especially given the greatest hits clips of workplace accidents set to music, but still not riveting.
Sighing, you leaned back in your chair.
You were going to fuck the mushroom…
How the hell had your life gotten here?
Your thoughts drifted back to him staring at you in shock as you left him hanging during a session. Fuck that has been hot…
You glanced over at him, running through every kinky thought you had of him.
Denying him, making him cum, plugging his tentacles so he couldn't get off.
Across from you, you could see him tense.
Wait…
Ohhhh my god. He could read your mind, that meant...
You had no idea how a mushroom could give you such a distinct sensation of being glared at but he did.
This was too easy.
You countered by imagining slipping a vibe into one of those sensitive slits.
You could see one stem gripping the edge of the table.
Oh, you fucking loved this.
You imagined him, a vibe in each tendril, you stroking them slowly, idly, as if you had all the time in the world...
He shuddered.
And if he got too close, well, you'd just take them out.
Could he hold more than one load at a time? If you kept him plugged through one orgasm could you work on the next one without milking him?
What would happen if only one of the stems was left open, the rest plugged, forcing the fluid out one only...
You could see him looking at you and gave him an innocent smile.
With that, you got up, heading into the lounge for some coffee.
You hadn't even gotten the pot started before you found yourself turned and pushed against the wall by tentacle-like stems.
He was... Surprisingly strong for a mushroom.
"What the hell?" He snapped.
"What? You like reading people's minds. I thought I'd just give you something entertaining to think about."
He huffed, "To answer your questions you fucking cock tease, yes, I can hold more than one at a time but it gets kinda painful. And keeping one unplugged makes it all come out harder and faster."
"Do you like those ideas?"
"Fuck yes I do but you ever going to follow through?"
You chuckled, "Maybe. Guess you'll find out tonight, won't you?"
"You two okay in here?"
You looked over to see Brett standing worried in the doorway.
"We're fine!" You said cheerfully.
And with that you ducked out the door past him, leaving the mushroom to come up with whatever excuse he could think of.
As you took your seat back at the conference table you couldn't help but smile to yourself.
This was fun.
He'd shot you a text with an address after the meeting. His address, you guessed?
It wasn't a long trip but when you got there you were kind of surprised.
A three-story brownstone in Alexandria was not what you were expecting.
And it only gave you more questions. How did he get from here to Cognito without being spotted? Did he own the place? How did that work legally? Did he have some kind of human persona he had his legal stuff under? How much were they paying him that he could afford this place?
You knocked on the door awkwardly.
What if this was some kind of prank?
You'd kill him. That's what. With your bare fucking hands.
The door opened to reveal a middle-aged woman.
Shit.
"Ah… hello… I'm here to see Myc?"
She looked at you with a blank expression for a moment, "No solicit-" she spasmed slightly and then a familiar snarky voice came out of her mouth, "Get in here. Veronica's been on the fritz."
You ducked inside, shutting the door behind you.
"Welcome to Chateau du Myc."
Ohhh my god what a moron.
He emerged from the room past the foyer, a drink in hand, "Veronica, lock the door and go charge, doll."
The woman by the door did as she was told, disappearing into another room.
"What was-"
"Robotic answering service." He shrugged, "useful when you look like this."
"I was wondering about that."
"When it's not her, it's Andre."
"You live with Andre?"
"No, but he comes over. JR forbid us from living together after we trashed the last place. It is amazing the number of people who show up to a party when the goodie bags have free cocaine."
Oh…
He waved for you to follow him.
The place was bigger than you expected. Tidier too… at least downstairs. The place seemed to get more chaotic as you ascended the stairs.
The aesthetics became a mish-mash of refined sensible furniture mixed with a display of bongs, blacklight posters, and pinups.
It was like a frat had moved into a nice family home and was slowly converting it.
He led you up another flight to the top floor, past a den that had clearly been converted to some kind of man cave by him and Andre, to a door at the end of the hall. He opened it, leading you inside.
"Seriously?" You asked.
He waved a tendril, "Just take it all in."
You thought the house was eccentric. The room really just… exemplified it.
Hardwood floors, some kind of light system attached where a normal fixture would go, more blacklight posters bullshit, minifridge, a sex swing, drug and porn paraphernalia, etc but the real ridiculous centerpiece had to be the bed.
A circular, purple, bed.
You took a breath.
Okay, you could work with this.
The place looked like a Spencer's had thrown up on it but whatever.
You looked over at him, "Decided you don't need the tank tonight?"
"Not if you're gonna cocktease me like that again." He replied, setting down his drink.
"... Are you pouting?"
You'd never known a mushroom could look petulant before but you sure did now.
"No! I just don't like being jerked around!"
You chuckled, "Could have fooled me ~ and hey, I did say it would be worth it."
He paused, noticing the bag in your hand, "...Ohhohoho! Sex toys? Well, aren't you a freaky little fucker."
"If you haven't figured that out by now I don't know what to tell you." You smirked, "So, what now?"
"You tell me, Mx. I'm-In-Charge"
Your heart rate quickened at that. There was a challenging tone to his voice, a tone that masked something deeper. An eagerness you were excited to explore.
"Before we start, we need to cover body rules."
His tone flattened, "Rules? Seriously?"
"I don't know how you work. Last thing I wanna be known for at work is the person who fucked the incredibly valuable subterranean mushroom to death. "
"Thinking pretty highly of your skills there, aren't you?"
You chuckled, "Maybe, but it's still important. I need to know what I shouldn't do. What hurts and what doesn't "
"Alright alright, I've done BDSM before I get it." He waved a tendril, "Don't fuck with my face."
You paused, looking at him for a long moment.
He gave an exasperated sigh gesturing to the glowing orb below his cap, "You know this light bright here? Yeah. Don't fuck with it. "
"What about touching?"
His body shifted, stance becoming more guarded, wary. "Touching’s... okay."
"Kissing?"
You knew that he lit up a pink color when he spoke but the deep purple that he cast as you said that was new.
"Yeah, that's fine."
You approached him with a smile.
"Okay and here?" You trailed your fingers along his main stem.
You felt him shiver under your fingers, "Yeah..."
"Aaand up here?" You brushed your fingers over his gills and slightly along the brim of his cap.
"Fuck yes..."
"And of course the tentacles." You said, chuckling.
"They're not tentacles. They're flagella." He huffed, “Or stems."
"Okay. And... this?" You gestured to the swelling at his base that the flagella sprouted from.
"Yeah."
"So basically the rule is not the face." you laughed softly, "I can work with that. I was pretty rough with you before, was that okay?"
"Hell yes , it was." He said, "I haven't been handled like that in a long time."
"Okay, so you definitely like rough."
"I mean don't cut or burn me or anything, for my good or yours. Our blood doesn't exactly play nice with human skin."
"Okay, I'm rough but I'm not that rough." You chuckled, "The safe word from earlier okay for you?"
"Yeah. Can we hurry it up already? You've been jerkin’ my chain all day, Daddy's impatient."
You snorted, "Daddy? Really?"
"What? It's hot."
You rolled your eyes, "How can you be one of the most interesting people in the whole company and still be such a basic bitch?"
"Hey!" He peeked up, gesturing dramatically to himself, "This bitch is far from basic!"
Okay." You smirked, "Now... You can touch me anywhere too. Try not to, I don’t know, overdose me or something?" You paused, "If someone swallows your fluid..."
"Biocerebrate. I mean you could , but you'd trip balls big time." He leaned in, voice conspiratorial, "I'd much rather cover you in it anyway."
You felt your cheeks heat up at that. He cackled, "What? There's a reason Bukkake is one of my favorite genres."
"Okay... Well, not the eyes and try to minimize the hair?"
"I make no promises but I'll try."
"How reasonable of you." you chuckled.
"What? I'm a mushroom, not a monster."
"Alright, you ready?"
His tone was filled with confidence, "I’m always ready."
"Good." You grabbed his primary stem, practically dragging him across the room.
"Hey-"
You flung him toward the bed. Not violently but fast enough for him to get the idea of what you wanted.
Slowly, he sank onto the bed, flagella dangling over the edge.
You got down on the floor, opening your bag of toys.
The first item you pulled out made him shiver.
Sounding wasn't something you normally did much with partners. Never had anyone into it. But it was clear this was something that would work particularly well on him given the anatomy.
You'd brought options though. Sounds, beads, plugs of varying sizes. You weren't sure what he could accommodate.
"So, how does this normally work with your kind?" You asked, deliberately taking your time to lay out the toys.
It was a tease but you knew he'd love it.
"Thought you would have studied up on this."
"Details are above my security level."
"It's not complicated." He held up two flagella, the tip opened on one. They could definitely accommodate more than a finger. He slid another flagella into the first, moving them together with a moan.
"So it doesn't hurt you having things plugged?"
"No. Fuck, come on why are you still teasing me?"
"Well for one because it's going to make you come way harder, two because I need to know so I don't hurt you, and three because it's fun."
"You really are a sick bastard." You didn’t miss the undercurrent of excitement to his words.
"Soooo plugging things...."
"You can fucking plug them just make sure I'm able to get the load out by the end of it!" He snapped, tendrils thrusting together impatiently.
Reaching out, you gripped the two flagella, slowly pulling them apart from one another, "I asked for a demonstration, I didn't say you get to get off yet."
"Oh fuck you!"
"We'll see if you're still saying that when I've been edging you for a while."
He tensed slightly, you could swear you heard his breath catch.
Difficult to tell with a mushroom though.
You reached out, taking a small stem in hand. He shivered, head down, watching you.
Holding up the tendril, you selected a sound. A medium-thickness metal rod, rounded at the end.
Carefully, you pressed the tip to the slit at the end of the tendril. He took it easily, gasping as you worked it inside.
"Ohhhhh fuck..."
Idly, you moved the rod in and out, rubbing the inner walls of his flagella. The effect was intense. Way more intense than the regular hand job sessions were. No snarky quips this time, just moans and gasps. He trembled, his other tendrils gripped the edge of the bed tightly...
Until you drew another one toward you.
He let you take it, still watching attentively.
Picking up a plug, a rather thick one designed more for anal play, you pressed it to the willing slit.
The sound had gone in smoothly. With this, you met slight resistance. But that was fine.
You were more than patient.
You added lube to the toy, gently dipping it in and out of the slit, watching it expand to slowly stretch around the toy.
"Shit... Fuck- ah..."
You chuckled, "Hmmm glad I brought these along. After all, I don't exactly have back up with me and I'd hate for you to come and have it all go to waste."
He shuddered.
"Especially not if you want to empty it on me." You murmured, eyeing him.
" Christ …" he breathed, "Fucking hell..."
After several long moments, you were able to get the plug seated in the tendril in your hand.
Then you simply moved to the next one.
Each tendril was given a plug. Many took time to get properly anchored. You relished it, watching as he shook and hunched over. The sounds he made were desperate and needy and oh fuck you loved it.
By the time you were down to the last one, he was a mess.
"Fuck, yes. Yes. God, shit, damn, don't stop..."
You had no plans on it.
All flagella firmly plugged but one, you began to sound him. One hand worked the sound on the inside, the other held him, jerking him in slow steady strokes, making him extra aware of the metal rod holding him open and plugging him up.
"You like being milked, huh?"
"Yes... God, yes!"
"This better than the usual?"
"S-so much better."
He squirmed as you teased him, writhing and panting.
When he began to get close you withdrew the sound.
"SON OF A BITCH! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!"
You chuckled. The one free flagella with the sound removed was already leaking but not enough to be a full orgasm.
"I'm sorry , did you think I was going to let you come already?"
His voice was filled with bitter acceptance, "You are a sadistic fucker."
"Oh trust me, I could be worse." There was a tiny tremor through him at that.
You took the flagella in your hand, running your finger over the slit, teasing it, playing with it.
In doing so, you noticed something.
There was a benefit to him functionally having dicks for hands...
With plugs in them, he was damn near useless with them. It was like putting booties on a dog or cat.
It was two for one. A toy and a restraint.
"Mmmm..." You looked down at the tendril in your hand.
As he'd gotten more worked up it had swelled. Not significantly but enough that you could feel the difference. You supposed it made sense, erogenous zones did that with humans, why not sentient mushrooms.
"Ohhh my god, less science more milking!" He snapped.
Still reading your mind.
Well then.
You jerked him forward by the stem in your hand, stroking him roughly, "Yeah? You want to be milked?"
"Fuck, yes goddammit come on!"
You smirked "You wanna cum?"
"Yes! Fucking shit , you know I do!"
You let him go and sat back with a sweet smile.
"Say please."
"Oh fuck you!"
"Alright then, I guess we'll see how long you can deal." You grabbed the tendril again, slowly sinking the sound back into its slit.
"A-ah! Fuck, no, wait..." He tried to catch his breath, "Fuuuuuck. Oh..."
You kept the sound moving torturously slowly, watching him squirm.
"You know if you wanna cum, you just gotta say one thing.~"
"Piss off!”
"Not quite." You chuckled, "I told you you'd have to learn some manners."
He whined and you continued teasing him slowly with the sound, watching as he twisted and shuddered.
"You know... There's no reason only one of us should have fun."
"What-"
You let him go and began to undress, slowly methodically.
"Now we're talking!" He said with excitement.
You smirked, "What? You think this is for you? " Sinking back down to the floor you retrieved a dildo, placing it under you.
He froze when he realized what you were doing, his voice flat with disappointment, "You're an ass."
You rode down on the toy with an eager moan, "Just because you can't get off doesn't mean I can't.”
You seized his tendril again, moving the sound in time with the roll of your hips as you fucked yourself on the toy.
"Oh, you f-fucking evil bitch."
You moaned, "Sorry, I can’t hear you over how fucking good this feels… ah!"
Frustrated sounds poured from him and it only made you more enthusiastic about riding the toy. You kept yourself focused though, even as your own orgasm was impending. The second you thought he might cum you'd stop moving the sound, simply holding the tendril while he watched you fuck yourself.
When the orgasm hit, you gasped, leaning forward, one hand on the bed, the other still firmly gripping him.
"Fuck! Come on!" He practically begged.
As you rode out of the waves of pleasure you smirked up at him, breathless, "What do you say?~"
"Okay, fine, please for the love of god milk me!"
You chuckled, taking the tendril with the sound in hand and once again beginning to slide the sound in and out.
"Fuck yes. Fuck yes. Come on, oh god, oh fuc-AH!" As he started to cry out you twisted the tendril below the sound, preventing the fluid from going anywhere.
"Fuckfuckfuckfuck! Please!"
Taking your sweet time, watching the tentacles swell with fluid, stretching the base of them, you removed the sound and untwisted it.
"Fuck me!" He cried out, breaking off into guttural moans as fluid shot out of the flagella in your hand. It spattered against your chest, ran down your thighs, and the sight of it seemed to work him up even more. You started milking the cum from him slowly now that the first burst had passed the other tendrils twisted, swollen with unreleased fluid.
"F-FUCK come on, faster -"
You gave the tendril a hard squeeze, making him yelp, "No. I set the pace. You're lucky I let you cum at all."
He gasped, "You really are a fucking jackass."
"Am I?" You picked up another plug and began slowly sinking it into the one free tendril, "Because it's about to get so much worse for you."
He shook, crying out as you plugged the only outlet he had for release. There was some distention in his base and tendrils. He panted, falling back on the bed, "Fuck..."
It sounded almost defeated... But not quite.
You picked up another weapon from your arsenal. A vibrator.
He looked down at you and the second he saw what was in your hand he tried to back up on the bed. You grabbed his main stem, holding him still, "No."
There was a pause and before you continued, you reached out, gently running your fingers down the side of his 'face', "You hanging in there?"
"Screw you." he spat back.
"Myc..." You gave him a look.
"I'd be better if you kept going." He hissed.
With a chuckle, you climbed onto the edge of the bed.
Picking up one of his plugged flagella you put the vibrator to the plug and turned it on high.
"Fuck shit Jesus Christ oh fuckfuckfuckfuck!" He writhed and arched, his body shaking, "Fuck you gotta let me cum please fucking Christ you gotta let me cum."
"Do I now?"
"Fuck please, please! Ah!" He cried out arching, and you could see the base of his flagellum swell further.
Taking one of the tendrils in hand, you worked the plug out. The pressure helped and the second it was free you were drenched, greenish-blue fluid draining down your body.
"Good boy..." You chuckled, "Very good...."
He twitched, gasping and you took one of the other tendrils, removing the plug from it, and working the remaining loads out of him.
"A-ah.. ahh oh god.. fuck..."
With one hand still milking him, you reached out for the vibe, running it up the other unplugged flagella.
He seized, "Fuckfuckfuckfuck!"
"Hmmmm... I teased you all day. Maybe I should make it up to you by making sure you're completely drained..."
That made him arch and cry out, further spurts of fluid coming from the two unplugged tendrils.
If you didn't know better you would think he was having some kind of seizure from the way he twitched and spasmed.
The floor was going to be a mess…
Maybe if you did this again…
A thought came to mind and you smirked, "Maybe I can modify one of those milking machines… or a suction toy… then we wouldn't make as much of a mess."
Curious, you took the end of the freed stem and slipped the tip of the vibe inside.
"F-FUCK!"
"Hmm.." You ran your hand over where his tendrils were anchored to his body. It was slightly swollen and when you gently pushed on it you were rewarded with another spasm, cum rushing out around the vibe in your hand.
"You really are filled up aren't you?"
"Fuckyes."
Gently, your slid hand over the sort of paunch his limbs were anchored to, feeling fluid moving beneath the surface. You dragged your hand down, squeezing it down into the flagella and slowly emptying him with long, drawn-out pulls.
With his other tendrils blocked it wasn't hard to get the fluid moving out of the two freed ones.
Finally, he made a hissing sound, one of his tendrils grabbing your hand. He made a sound of discomfort and you noticed his flagella were looking a bit worse for wear. Almost as if they were drying up. The skin had gone rough and taut.
"Oh, shit." You said in alarm, "That looks painful."
"That's because it is." He gasped.
"Okay… let's get the rest of these out of you."
" Please ."
With a little extra lube, you were able to free the remaining plugs. Leaving him laying back on the bed, exhausted and leaking.
You looked him over, "Is there anything I can put on them to help?"
"I need water, a shot of vodka, and a cigarette." He gestured to the mini-fridge.
You slid off the bed, "Would ice help for the pain?"
"No, just need to rehydrate."
The mini-fridge was a mix of water and alcohol. Because of course, it was.
When you brought him the drinks you found him laying back, propped up on pillows, a cigarette sticking out from the lip of his cap.
He threw back the shot and then drank the water slowly.
You could tell he was drinking. Everything was being held up to the brim of the cap, but the mechanism by which he actually drank? You had no clue.
Carefully, you settled into the bed next to him, opening your own water, "You alright?"
"I will be when I replace all the liquid you squeezed out of me."
"Anything I can do to help?"
He looked at you in a way you were 100% sure was meant to be a side-eye, "You're going to help me into an early grave like this."
You shook your head, "No. The rough stuff’s done. I want to help you feel better."
"... Suspicious."
You laughed and, very carefully, leaned in to press a light kiss to the bright globe of his face.
"Seriously."
After a moment he sighed, "There's a tube in the bedside table."
You retrieved it. It was a rather nondescript tube of ointment of some kind.
"Just rub some of it into the ends.”
Stretching out next to him, you took one of his flagella in hand. He flinched slightly but you were gentle, rubbing ointment into the ends carefully. The improvement was immediate and it seemed like the relief was too. He relaxed but you noticed him watching you with interest.
When everything had been tended to, you capped the tube, leaning across him to put it on the bedside table.
There was a sharp smack across your ass that made you jump and you sat back glaring at him. He laughed, “What? You were the one presenting it.”
Rolling your eyes, you flopped back down next to him again.
“... Surprised you were so good at that. You always seem ready to tear them off,” he said idly.
Looking up at him you raised a brow, “Well… yeah? Aftercare’s a thing. And I can be gentle, jeez.”
“Coulda fooled me.”
Reaching up you patted the side of his face, “Maybe you’ll get to see more of that another time.”
“Maybe I’ll say no.”
“Hmmmm… you think so?” you smirked.
“Hell no.” he took a draw on his cigarette.
"So? Worth the wait?"
"Fuck yes..."
You laughed, looking over at him, "Didn't think you'd be that much of a bottom."
His head whipped around towards you, "It's called being a switch, bitch, get it right."
"Yeah? Cause that looked an awful lot like bottoming to me."
“Fuck off.”
“Already did, jackass.”
Amicable silence fell as the pair of you lay there watching wisps of smoke drift towards the ceiling.
“We should do this again.” he said abruptly, “That was the best lay I’ve had in a while.”
"Aren't you always bragging about how good at this you are?" You laughed, "I figured I'd be too amateur for you."
There was a bit of a pause before he turned his head to look at you, "You want some real shit?"
"Yeah?"
"Most people are more into using my flagella than getting me off and not just Cognito." He settled back on the pillows with a sigh, "Sex is great. I fuckin love it and I'm good at it. I'm just not always satisfied. Shit’s not the same with you monkeys."
"Oh?"
"Yeah. I'm part of a hive cluster. Sex is practically conversation."
"... Wait, seriously?"
"Yeah. That isn't just cum it's like…" he gestured idly, "A way to exchange information. It's like a long conversation when you've had too many edibles."
You snorted.
"And it's with more than one person. Most of you are missing out."
"That why you like orgies?"
"Eh, one reason, yeah." He sounded a little dismissive. Not entirely like his usual snarky self.
You thought about it for a moment. You supposed having tentacles it made sense that he'd be considered the life of the party at an orgy. But in a way... that was sort of just using him as an elaborate sex toy...
"Bingo. You got there, kid... And they're not tentacles.”
You batted away the stem he'd draped over your head, wiping away a trail of fluid, "Oh come on in my hair?!"
He cackled, "What? You couldn't get enough earlier!"
"Oh my god." You rolled your eyes
After a moment or two you glanced at him, "So… what's different here?"
"You actually try?" He scoffed, "Look, handjobs only do so much. That's not really all we do. Like you can get there but it's not as satisfying…"
"Funny you don't like that given you like denial."
"That's different."
You lay together in an amicable quiet for a few moments as you processed this information.
Sex was a conversation for them. Something that happened in groups. How intimate was it? How intimate could it be?
You felt him tap your head with a flagella, "It's literally like mind-melding or some shit. You guys don't really have that. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it’s fuckin hot reading what goes on in people’s heads when we’re going at it but it’s not the same thing cause it’s a one-way radio."
"So you basically just read each other’s minds?"
“That’s one way to put it.”
“I mean… people can think about all kinds of shit during sex. I mean, I’ve had sex, where all I could think is ‘god when is this going to be over’ or ‘oh god my leg is cramped’. So, I imagine that’s not always great.”
“Eh, it’s more than that.” he gestured, “And yeah, it’s intimate. Kinda more than mind reading.”
“Can you give me an example?”
"I don’t know! Shit! That’s like trying to explain what something sounds like to a deaf person!”
You paused, considering this.
Finally, he sighed, “It’s like knowing someone. Like… all of them at once. Good, bad, ugly.”
“Oh…”
"Yeah." He said, "Exactly. That’s one benefit of being with humans…”
“... What?”
“You can’t know me.”
Well… that was fucking heavy, Jesus.
“But I can know all about you .” he chuckled, “And that's why I know you jerked off to me today."
"What?!"
" Twice ."
He sounded so fucking smug.
"Jerk! Stop fucking going through my brain for shit like that!"
"Why? What are you gonna do about it?"
Ohhh the little challenge in his voice...
Reaching out, you seized a tentacle, twisting it slightly. You'd just told him the rough stuff was done, you didn't want to hurt him.
"What was that?" he shuddered and you leaned over him, lips grazing the globe of his face, "You wanna say that again?"
He shivered, “Thought you were going to be gentle next time.”
“Last I checked it’s still the same night.” you countered.
His words came out in a faltering eagerness, "Fuck, that's hot..."
You smirked, "Yeah?"
"Fuck yes."
Tendrils began to stroke along your hip and you shivered.
“You sure you’re fine with thi-ohhhhh” you gasped as the open end of one of the tendrils suctioned onto your sex.
“I don’t know, are you?~ ”
“Fuck…”
“Well, yeah, what do you think we’re doing?”
“Shut up.” you shot back.
“Hmmm I don’t think I have to,” he said, a tendril coming up to wrap lightly around your neck, “Pretty sure you used up your quota for bossing me around. It’s my turn .”
Ohhhhh fuck…
That was hot.
You were pulled forward to your knees effectively straddling him.
A couple of the tendrils twisted around one another, butting against your entrance, the flagella on your sex kept it’s grip on you.
Reaching out, you put your hands on the headboard to steady yourself, “Ohhhh god…”
“I’ve been called that before.” he joked, the tentacles at your entrance teasing you.
“Asshole.” you chuckled.
“You love it.”
Two tendrils were wrapped around your legs, steadying you, one was suctioned to your sex, another two were idly playing with your entrance, and the last one trailed down from your neck to loop around your waist. You shuddered, rocking your hips.
“You know, you’re getting off easy tonight.” he said, tightening his grip, “I'm still sore."
You shivered, "Yeah?"
"But trust me, next time? You're going first."
The tendrils teasing you pushed in and you tightened your hold on the headboard trying to rock your hips to drive him deeper.
It was useless. With the way he was wrapped around you and the flexibility of the stems inside you there was no way to push him deeper.
You whined.
"What? Not getting what you want? Gee, I wonder how that feels." He snarked, the suction on your sex amped up making your legs tense before pulling away from you.
"F-fuck!"
Your sex was exposed to air, hypersensitive from the level of suction he had been applying to it.
He chuckled, using the tip to stroke and tease at you, making you squirm.
Gasping, you found yourself burying your face in the soft surface of his cap. Fucking hell that was good…
You thought about how you'd fucked with him all day and wondered what that might be like if the roles were reversed.
The flagella around your waist slid up and down gently, an almost tender motion, as he answered your unspoken question, "You'd want to kill me by the end of it."
Fuck, you didn't know if you were ever going to get fully used to him reading your mind…
The tendrils inside pushed deeper, finding a spot in you that made your legs shake.
"Yeah?" You gasped, "You sure about that? You seemed pretty impatient."
"Damn right I was. You were being a fucking tease. But if I was doing it…"
You whined as the tendril suctioned to your sex again.
"Let's just say we wouldn't be confined to one room."
You felt your face heat up, thinking of the meeting earlier. He could probably reach you under the table. Or maybe he'd pull you into a storage closet somewhere.
He chuckled, "You're thinking too small. R&D has some really effective invisibility tech. I could fuck you in the middle of the foyer and no one would know if you kept your mouth shut."
Shit!
You trembled as he continued zeroing in on the spots that made your body just want to give out.
"Fuck, that's it …" he moaned, "You kept Daddy waiting all day so now it's time to pay up."
Omfg, Daddy again?
"Damn right, again." There was a practically evil chuckle to him, "Actually… I don't think you're going to get to come until you say it too."
"Oh fuck you!" You laughed.
Abruptly, the tendrils withdrew from you leaving you without stimulation. You yelled, your hips rolling of this own accord.
He laughed, "Oh, you thought I was joking? Sorry, let me laugh harder!"
You glared at him as he cackled, "Are you fucking serious?"
"As a heart attack." He squeezed you, "If you wanna come tonight you gotta say it. I think we'll add a please on top of that."
"Oh my fucking god."
The tip of a flagella barely brushed your sex, making you bite your lip, "F-fuck…"
The pair of tendrils worked their way back inside and you were blissfully stimulated again.
"Ohh god, oh fuck yes…"
Your body tensed as he drew out the sensations. The one tendril around your waist slipped up to suction onto a nipple and you cried out, tensing.
Fuck, that felt good. Ohhh fuck…
The suction on your sex returned, stronger this time, riding the edge of overstimulating. Fuck, god you were going to-
Everything stopped and you cried out, legs shaking and nails digging into the headboard.
"Ah, ah, ah," his voice was filled with vindictive glee, "Not til you say the magic words."
Ohhh fuck…
After a moment, the tendrils returned to their motions, teasing, touching, the one at your nipple moved to the other, latching on.
"Fuck, you are trying to kill me."
"After today? You kinda deserve it."
You huffed, "You loved it."
"Aw," he said, his voice dripping with condescension, "Who's pouting now?"
"Shut up!"
He dug the tendrils into a particularly sensitive spot making you shake and cry out.
"I don't think I will."
The intense suction was back on your sex, driving you up a wall. You bucked to try to get him to go in harder but he refused to be rushed, taking his time.
You twisted, gasping, your head resting in his as you desperately tried to come.
"All you gotta do is say two little words." He chuckled.
"Fuck you."
"Wrong answer, hot stuff."
The tendrils withdrew again and you cried out in frustration.
"You ready to ask nicely? "
Oh, he sounded so fucking pleased with himself…
You hated how hot it was.
He chuckled, "I might be sore but I could do this all night, just warning you."
Ohhh God…
"Just two words…" he said, low and amused, "And you can come."
Gritting your teeth, you gave in, "Please, Daddy."
The tendrils were tending to you again but not nearly enough to make you come. He was playing with you, teasing you.
"Nah, you gotta say it like you mean it." As a point of emphasis, he applied suction to your sex, the tendrils inside driving home and making you tense.
"F-fuck! Please!"
"Please what?"
"Please, Daddy can I come?!"
He chuckled, tendrils finding their mark inside you, demanding and intense.
"Come for me."
You cried out as he amped up suction and movement, your body shaking. You were-
You muffled a scream against his cap, gasping and clinging to the headboard.
"That's it…" he kept moving. Dragging out the peak, making you come again and again until your legs were giving out.
"Oh-okay- I-"
You felt him withdraw before you even got to the point of needing the safe word, helping you lay back in bed, gasping for air.
"Was that so hard?" He mocked.
"Fuck off."
He chuckled.
Silence fell. Your body was slowly cooling, your breathing beginning to even. Several muscles hurt but you kinda expected that.
You were twitching, reveling in the delicious afterglow, eyes beginning to slip shut.
You lie there, drifting in and out of sleep.
The room smelled like petrichor and cigarettes.
"Fuck..." You finally managed to gasp.
There was a chuckle, "Oh good you're still alive, I don't have to turn in any paperwork."
You didn't even look up, you just flipped him the bird.
He laughed.
Reaching out, you tugged him over, your arm looped around his stem, "Shut up."
A tendril came to rest gently on your head.
"Glad to see I didn't completely scramble your brains."
"Mn."
You were gross and slick with one arm wrapped around a giant sentient mushroom and fuck you had never been more satisfied.
"Oh I'll have to add that to my RightSwipe: 'Never been more satisfied," a review from one of my many lovers."
You snorted, "I'd tell you to get out of my brain but I know it won't stop you."
"Sure as hell won't."
"... Do you have a shower in this place?"
"What? Don't wanna be seen doing the walk of shame?"
You huffed, "No, I'm just fucking drenched in mushroom cum."
There was a pause, "You know, you could just ask to stay the night "
You froze.
"Told ya, always in your head." He tapped your head with a tentacle
"Fine. If you already know, what's the answer?”
His response sounded so self-satisfied, "Nah, I want you to ask. "
Heat flushed your face
"... Could I spend the night?"
"Sure thing, Hot Stuff. Shower’s in the back."
“...I’ll get on that when I can feel my legs again.”
He laughed, "Ohhh I'm gonna have fun with you."
The feeling was 100% mutual.
