Chapter Text
"WHAT IN THE WORLD IS GOING ON!!!???"
I thought it was just a joke. I thought the whole world was trying to pull a prank on me. I really thought everyone was just pretending to be unaware of my existence for the fun of it.
But even after yelling my lungs out while making an exaggerated pose people were sure to notice, not a single person looked my way. Not even the scary-looking librarians sitting at the desk right next to where I was!
This was supposed to be a library! I shouldn’t be allowed to make this much noise!
I was drawing near to the brink of despair at the strangeness of my situation, that is, until I noticed a tuft of purple hair coming my way from my peripheral view.
"Tsukasa-kun, what are you doing?"
But his eyes were really saying, “Have you finally lost it?”
It was Rui, the director of our troupe Wonderlands x Showtime, and he was looking at me like how any sane person should be at this very moment. Although he was the last person after Emu that I expected to ever look at me in such a way, and the last person I thought I would run into at a library that was far from where we both lived.
"Rui—!" Tears were starting to well up in my eyes. Damn it, he was the last person I thought I'd be crying out of happiness just from seeing! "You can see me, right!?"
Rui moved his index finger to his lips and urgently hushed me, "Wait, Tsukasa-kun, quiet down, I’m sure you know this is a library?. Let's head outside and talk about whatever it is that’s bothering you."
It was perfectly fine for us to keep talking where we were, since there was no one around who could hear my voice. But Rui would probably be seen as a weirdo talking to the air. Plus, it was too scary to argue with him when the Rui who usually had a weird smile on his face was suddenly making such a serious expression.
But Rui hasn’t seemed to have noticed it yet, so I would probably have to explain my current dilemma word for word once we left the building. So I followed him to the front door.
It didn’t take us long to arrive outside the building, and we stood next to the automatic glass doors where there were fortunately no people idling around at.
"...So? What made you decide to start shouting in the library of all places?" Rui immediately folded his arms and glared down at me. My loud voice must have annoyed him pretty badly...
"I-I'm sorry, I know it's courtesy not to be loud at the library, but there was something I needed to confirm…" I raised both my palms and retreated a little, begging him to allow me to explain myself.
"Something you needed to confirm…?" Rui tilted his head, curious about my words.
"Yeah," I nodded. "Didn't it seem weird to you back there? That the librarians didn't even notice me being loud?"
"That…" Rui stroked his chin and frowned. "...That's true. Did you recently bribe the library management to allow you to do as you please or something?"
"What kind of person do you take me for!?" I cried and released a huff. "I know it doesn't sound believable, but I think no one here can see me right now. Other than you, that is."
"...That's just illogical," Rui’s shoulders raised and dropped as he exhaled. "But it's true that at least the library visitors would have been annoyed by you. None of them seemed to care."
"Were you seriously considering that possibility!?" I stomped my foot angrily.
"...In any case, isn't this quite bad for you, Tsukasa-kun?" Rui moved one of his hands to the back of his neck. "If your family can't see you, how are you supposed to go home?"
"Mnngh, since you can see me, I think it's just the people here…" I suggested.
"That could be the case," Rui nodded in agreement. "It's still quite the fascinating mystery, though. First the Sekai, and now this? Fufu…"
"...Oi, you better not be getting any funny ideas," I gave Rui a deadpan look. But no matter what I say, once he had his heart set on something, I would just end up getting dragged into doing his bidding.
"You're right, it's not the time for it," Rui waved his hand in dismissal. "It'll be quite bad for our show if it turns out the audience members are unable to see you too. Since they're not as familiar as your family and I are with you - which could also be the factor contributing to this phenomenon."
"Argh, I didn't think about that at all—!!" I held my temples upon being hit with the realization. Rui had a point, if I can't be seen by the audience, I won't be able to make any shows—!!!
"Let's visit the Sekai, KAITO-san might have an idea of what's going on," Rui proposed as he fished out his smartphone from the pocket of his jacket.
“—Oh, that’s a good idea,” I concurred.
I took a few steps closer to him, after which he navigated to his music app and played the song ‘The World Hasn’t Even Started Yet’.
____________________________________________________________________________
The sight of crowded buildings and the passing-by shoppers were replaced by the scenery of a kiddish-looking theme park covered in bright contrasting colours. The first sign of life we were greeted with was the cat and dog stuffed animals wrestling one another as a pink rabbit and a raccoon watched on.
Although I don’t usually take notice of the stuffed animals, it was a common sight to find those two particular stuffed animals being rough with each other. The man of the day, KAITO, was also crouched down beside the two onlookers with a worried look on his face.
Without further ado, I waved a hand as I called out to him, “KAITO-san—!”
He noticed me as I was waving eagerly in his direction. He sprung to his feet and greeted the two of us with a slight bow as our footsteps led us closer to him.
“Tsukasa-kun, Rui-kun,” KAITO had a brotherly smile spread across his face as per the usual. “Welcome to Sekai. Did you come to consult me about the production perhaps?”
“Oh no, not today,” I waved my hand in refutation. “There was something else I had to consult you about…”
“—It seems that no one other than us can see or hear Tsukasa-kun right now,” Rui took the words out of my mouth before I could even get started. I shot a glare at him, but he pretended to not to notice and smiled innocently as if he hadn’t just interrupted me. What an annoying guy. “From the looks of it, it seems you can see Tsukasa-kun too, so that’s a relief.”
“...No one can see or hear you?” KAITO cupped his chin and cocked his head curiously. “That sounds like something straight out of a book. Are you sure you two aren’t imagining things?”
“I don’t think we are,” Rui shook his head, and started scratching the back of his head with a troubled look on his face. “I was there when Tsukasa-kun started randomly shouting in the library. No one noticed him at all.”
From spending long enough around Rui’s laidback attitude and hearing KAITO mentioning the word ‘book’, an idea sprung to mind, and I grew increasingly vexed at the prospect of it, “Or, this could be part of a show you have planned to prank me.”
“Fufu, I assure you I didn’t do anything of the sort. I may not have any concrete evidence to back it up, but—” Rui said with ingenuity, but his unturned lips quickly widened into a mischievous smile, “In the first place, where would I find the budget to hire such experienced actors who won’t even show an ounce of annoyance at your loudness? If I had such a high budget, I would much rather spend that on improving the quality of our shows as Wonderlands x Showtime than for my own personal benefit of annoying you.”
“Gguuh…” I groaned in defeat. Everything Rui said was true, and as much as I wanted it to be just a prank, it was likely not.
“Since you both sound convinced of it, then it mustn’t have been your imagination,” KAITO narrowed his brows in contemplation as his eyes rolled down towards the ground. “Hm… I can’t think of any explanation for it. Shouldn’t this be your strong suit, Rui-kun?”
“I haven’t even figured out this strange Sekai yet, so I doubt I can figure out yet another strange mystery in a short span of time,” Rui said with a sheepish smile, bringing his hand to his hair once again. “...Since you seem quite well-informed with this Sekai, I was thinking you might know something, KAITO-san.”
“So you think the origins of this phenomenon are from along the same vein as the Sekai?” KAITO blurted out his interpretation of Rui’s insinuations without reservation. “...Unfortunately, I’m not aware of anything like this happening because of a person’s feelings.”
“...Is that so…” Rui looked away and cupped his chin once again. From the looks of it, he was back to immersing himself in the depths of his ever-so busy mind.
Now that I finally had the opportunity to step into the conversation, I crossed my arms impatiently, “...We need to make sure this doesn’t end up affecting our shows. Wonder Stage can’t afford to lose a future star like myself!”
“That’s true,” KAITO agreed with me. “Do you know whether Emu-chan and Nene-chan can still see you?”
“I haven’t met either of them yet today, so I can’t say. But I feel bad bothering them on a day-off...” I shook my head, and began scratching my hair out of frustration. “ But if I know they’re still able to see me, I wouldn’t have to worry anymore…! Ggghh…!!!”
“Fufu, I’m sure you aren’t bothering them,” KAITO reassured me kindly. “The two of them did come here to share some snacks with the kids.”
“They’re here?” Rui raised his head in surprise, and his hand fell back to his sides.
“KAITO onii-san~!”
And with that, the said problem child was summoned by the mere mention of her name. A blob of pink hair emerged from the tent with a packet of taiyaki in each hand, and not too long after a fluff of green hair followed after her. But instead of feeling the usual exasperation in my chest that comes whenever I see her, my chest instead became heavy with relief.
“Emu! Nene!” I called for the two of them, and my concerns were immediately taken away when their faces lit up upon hearing my voice.
Emu came up to the three of us in a stride, and began bobbing her head up and down restlessly with two boxes stacked up in her hands.
“Oh! Tsukasa-kun and Rui-kun are here too!” Emu exclaimed happily, but her expression immediately turned downcast. “Mmmm, but I don’t have enough taiyaki for the two of you…”
“I’m fine,” I waved my hand, turning down her sentiment. I then exhaled a breath of relief, “Really, I’m more thankful that you can see me than anything…”
“Eh? See you?” Emu cocked her head curiously. “What do you mean?”
We explained the situation to both Emu and Nene. Of course, the first reaction from Emu was—
“Whaaaat!? So you’re actually invisible right now, Tsukasa-kun!?” Emu’s eyes lit up with stars. “Isn’t that super super cool!?”
“Speaking from a scientific perspective, it truly is fascinating,” Rui commented, his index finger rubbing his chin once more.
“You better not think of pulling anything weird…” was all Nene had to say, though.
“Oi!!!” I yelled. Really, these three have no concern for the feelings of their chairman! “Read the atmosphere better, would you!? And Nene, what kind of weird things were you even thinking about!?
“Hahaha…” KAITO forced his laughter as he looked over at me with pity. KAITO was really the only one here who understood my pain—! “In any case, it’s a relief that you’ll be able to make shows as usual now.”
“Yeah, that’s true,” I turned my body to face KAITO. “With this, I can rest easy. I suppose I’ll be on my way now, then.”
“...But, if Tsukasa-kun is invisible, aren’t you worried that your family might not be able to see you?” Emu asked, throwing a question that didn’t suit the current carefree atmosphere at all.
“Oi, Emu, don’t bring up something so morbid right now…” I retorted as I crossed my arms. “I don’t want to be bothered about this, so I’ll just worry about it when it happens. I’m satisfied enough knowing that our shows are unlikely to be affected.”
“Tsukasa-kun…” Emu began to frown. “It sounds like you’re more worried about shows...”
When I heard the words that spilled from Emu’s lips, my body immediately straightened.
What kind of suggestion was that!?
“What even gave you that idea…? I just don’t want to get unnecessarily worked up about this.” I told her calmly.
“Here I thought you cared more about your sister…” Nene shook her head in dismay. “Show idiot.”
“Fufu, it can’t be helped, some unbelievable things did just happen,” Rui gave me a pitying look.
The only words that came into my head in response to their insensitive teasing were— “Show some consideration for your chairman, will youuuuu—!?”
“Hahaha…” the same laughter left KAITO’s lips. I understand, there’s nothing else you can do in this situation, after all…
“Anyway. I’m leaving,” I said with finality. “Are you heading back as well, Rui?”
“I’m fine,” Rui shook his head. “I was thinking of spending some time reading in the library.”
“Hmm, is that so,” I hummed aloud. “Don’t stay out too long.”
“Got it,” Rui smiled as he nodded back.
With that, I turned on my heel and stopped the playback of ‘The World Hasn’t Even Started Yet’ on my smartphone. But even as I was engulfed by the white light from my screen, I could still feel Emu’s gaze trained on my back.
She must have been serious about her words earlier, even if they were treated as a joke in the end. It was just a slip of tongue for me to talk about shows instead of my family first. She didn’t have to take it to heart, not when she usually couldn’t care less about ripping on me about other things.
I really hope it won't bother her for long.
____________________________________________________________________________
The day of the incident ended anticlimactically. Once I was back in the city, I practiced impromptu acting in the crowds and gained the concerned gazes of a couple of passersby, so I knew from there they could all still see me. The phenomenon must have only been restricted to that certain town, for some reason.
Perhaps there was some supernatural activity there…? But that was really the least of my concerns, so I easily let go of the thought.
When I arrived home, Saki was there to welcome me home as usual. I was relieved that my family could still see me, and now that was one concern off my list.
There was still the lingering possibility of the people at school being unable to see me, but I didn’t care for it as much as I thought I would. It just meant I would have an excuse to focus on the show’s production instead.
Fortunately, everyone in my classroom was still able to see me. They did look at me weird when I began exhaling in relief whenever our eyes met.
Finally, the school day was over, and I met Rui and Nene at the school gates as promised.
“—Tsukasa-kun,” Rui was the first to call my name. “Did things go well today?”
“Yeah,” I confirmed. “Everyone was still able to see me.”
“That’s good,” Nene smiled with relief. “It would be difficult if you were marked as absent and you’d suddenly need to explain yourself to your parents.”
I stroked my chin in realization, “I didn’t think about that, actually…”
Nene squinted her eyes in disappointment, “You’re really carefree, aren’t you…”
I knocked my chest with a fist, “I-I can’t help it, I’ve got a lot of things to plan out for our show, after all!”
“Right, right, that’s a show idiot for you,” Nene ended the exchange with a sigh.
I didn’t let the argument end there, though. If you were going to call me names, call me a ‘star’ instead! “Wha—! Where did that come from!?”
“Now, now,” Rui stepped in between us, using his taller body to block us from each other’s view. “If we don’t hurry now, we’ll keep Emu-kun waiting.”
“...That’s true,” I quickly regained my composure. It was actually quite normal for Nene to call me things at this point, and as much as I wanted to give her my piece of mind, I knew she wouldn’t stop anyway.
With that, the three of us were on our way to Phoenix Wonderland. We ended up running into Emu en route, where we found her raising herself on top of the counter of a food truck to be on level with a bunch of sweet potatoes that were encased in glass. Her eyes were hungrily focused onto the sweet potatoes, similar to predator locking on its prey.
“...Emu,” I called out her name as I eyeballed her with the usual disappointment. “What are you doing?”
Emu instantly perked up and turned around at the sound of my voice. The fiery flames in her eyes were gone now, “Oh! Tsukasa-kun! Nene-chan! Rui-kun! Wonderhoy~! ☆”
“‘Wonderhoy~! ☆’ my foot!” I yelled. “What do you think you’re doing up there!? Get down here now!”
“Tsukasa-kun, I haven’t eaten at all in the past hour...” Emu whined with a scrunched up expression. This time she looked like an abandoned puppy that hadn’t eaten for ages. “I couldn’t stop myself when I smelled the scent of freshly baked sweet potatoes...!”
Emu’s appetite wasn’t anything strange to any of us now. And in this instance too, the cause must have been—
“...Is that so. So I’m guessing you only have a credit card on you right now, and that’s why you can’t buy anything?” I said monotonously.
“Exactly!” Emu responded enthusiastically. “Hehe, Tsukasa-kun, are you an esper?”
“It’s happened several times before, after all…” I couldn’t help the sigh that escaped my lips.
“I’ll buy it for you then…” Nene sighed along with me, and held out her frog purse. “Could you talk to the shop owner, Tsukasa?”
“Don’t tell me you still haven’t gotten over your shyness,” I gave Nene a deadpan look with some intention to tease her, to which she responded by curling her lips into a sulk.
“Haah? Don’t you ever get tired of complaining?” Nene blurted out. “How long do you intend to keep Emu dangling there with that sad puppy-dog face of hers?”
“Fine, fine,” I gave in.
I walked up to the counter as Emu’s eyes followed me the entire time with her anticipation not being very well-hidden. I wanted to tell her to stop, but as Nene said, I was too exhausted to make anymore comebacks at this point. So I obediently did as I was requested.
“Excuse me,” I lifted my head to look at the shop owner behind the raised counter. “We’d like a—”
But the man wasn’t looking at me. His eyes were focused on Emu instead, and he was staring at her as if he was bewildered about something.
“...Hey, lil’ girl,” the man was referring to Emu. “It’s been bugging me for some time, but are you looking at someone? An imaginary friend?”
I took a moment to process his words. But when they sunk in, my heart dropped.
“Eh?” was all Emu could manage, and the shock made her let go of the counter and land back firmly on her feet.
I wasn’t able to see Nene and Rui’s expressions, since they were standing behind me. But the only thoughts swirling in my head at that time were—
“Here too!?”
____________________________________________________________________________
“What to do… What to do…”
“Fufu, you’ve been repeating the same thing over and over again since we left the food truck, Tsukasa-kun.”
Rui was right. I was currently sitting on the stage with my head dug in between my arms while muttering the same three words on repeat like a broken record. The other members of Wonderlands x Showtime had been gathered around me, each of their gazes filled with concern (and some fascination in Rui’s case).
For what felt like the millionth time of the day, I breathed out a sigh.
“Still, it’s really a lot worse than we thought it was…” Nene muttered. “Tsukasa won’t be able to appear on stage if the audience can’t see him. And if we also end up not being able to see him too…”
“Nnngh! Enough of this negative thinking!” I yanked my head out from in between my arms. “We just have to make sure the shows proceed smoothly, don’t we!?
“How do you say we go about that, though?” Rui raised the question. “As eager as I am to find a solution to your dilemma, I can’t say progress has been going well. This kind of thing doesn’t involve the traditional science, you see.”
“Mumumu…” I folded my arms against my chest, and shut my eyelids close as I tilted my head upwards in thought.
I wasn’t expecting Rui to come up with a magical cure out of nowhere, but it was indeed frustrating to be at a standstill.
“I have an idea—!” Emu raised her hand excitably. “If Tsukasa-kun is invisible, we can still talk to him through a robot, can’t we!?”
“...That might be a good idea,” Nene remarked with a face that had just come to the realization.
Rui seemed to like the idea as well, “I’ve made a Tsukasa-robo for the Christmas show before, so if I install the proper controls and modifications, Tsukasa-kun should be able to operate that robot.”
“A robot, you say…” my face twinged in discomfort.
“Oh? You seem rather dissatisfied,” Rui pointed out playfully. “Do you not have faith in my inventions?
“It’s not that…” I put on a troubled smile. “It’s just, we won’t be able to make the best shows if the lead actor himself isn’t properly facing the audience.”
“It’s not like we have much choice,” Nene had her fingers loosely intertwined with each other above her chest. “It’ll just have to be our work-around until we find a proper solution to it.”
“Still, I can’t stomach the idea of disappointing our audience like that…” I added as I held a thumb under my chin. “...It might be a good idea to hire a new actor in my place for the time being, actually.”
The three of them snapped their heads at me in unison with a mixture of shock and disbelief visible across their faces. My shoulders jumped a little at the overreaction.
“W-What are you saying, Tsukasa-kuuuuun!! We can’t do any shows without you!!” Emu shouted as she began tugging on my sleeves. “Don’t give up!!!”
“Hey Emu, you’re ruining my cardigan!!” I snapped at her as I attempted to shake her hands off my cardigan. “It’s not that I’m giving up! I just don’t want our shows to be ruined by something like this. A robot playing the role of the main character will definitely leave the audience with more questions rather than a good impression.”
“...You have a point,” Rui remarked. “It may be a good idea to find a temporary substitute for now, then.”
“Are you sure...?” Nene turned to Rui with an apprehensive look.
“It’ll be a good opportunity for you to overcome your shyness in working with other people too, Nene,” Rui added.
Nene’s expression twinged in reluctance. That issue must have been what was putting her ill at ease at the prospect of having a replacement actor. Although there was definitely the possibility that her performance would be impacted, we didn’t have many options on hand as she did say.
“I’ll obviously do my best, but…” Nene spouted determinedly, but she was still clearly apprehensive. “...It just doesn’t feel right.”
“Yeah…” Emu joined in. “I don’t want to make a show without Tsukasa-kun. I’d rather cancel the show if that was the case!”
“—We can’t cancel shows,” I said firmly with a tone of finality. “The show must go on. We can’t afford to let down our audience who’ve been looking forward to seeing us.”
“Still…” Emu gazed sadly at her feet.
“...I’m not going anywhere,” I sighed at the sight of Emu and Nene’s downcast expressions, and stood up from the stage and placed a different hand on each of their heads. “Hold your chins up high, you two!”
Nene looked away, “That’s easy for you to say… But fine.”
“...I’ll try,” Emu managed, although she still seemed unconvinced.
“...But I do agree about having a robot to use,” I turned to Rui, who was still standing to my side with his arms crossed. “I will need a way to converse with you guys if things end up going awry.”
“I’ll prepare it right away, then,” Rui gave me his word.
I then headed straight back to our main topic of discussion, “...Emu, is it possible for you to hold auditions right away?”
“Auditions…? But I don’t think we’re having any right now…” Emu claimed.
“Can you arrange one for Wonderlands x Showtime, then?” I asked. “We need to find only the best actors who can respond to Rui’s directions as soon as possible.”
From the corner of my eyes, I noticed Rui shifting his balance from one foot to the other when I said his name.
“...We have held auditions for Wonder Stage before, but almost no one came…” Emu said rather sadly.
“I don’t think that’ll be the case anymore,” I shook my head. “We’ve recently been garnering quite a lot of positive attention, so I think more people will be interested.”
“...Okay,” Emu’s expression started to improve a little. “I’ll talk with onii-chan about it, then.”
“I suppose I’ll have to be there to choose the best actor, then,” Rui remarked nonchalantly as he held his chin in his hand.
“That’s right,” I was just about to ask Rui to do so, but as usual, he understood the situation faster than everyone else. “I’m sorry for adding more to your workload, you two.”
“You don’t have to be sorry at all, Tsukasa-kun!” Emu insisted. “You should just focus on finding a way to stop this whole thing. It’s just for this once that we’re hiring a substitute actor, okay?”
“Of course,” the words leaked out from my mouth without a second thought. “Trust me, it frustrates me more than anything to have someone else take over the spotlight! So you better remember that the leading role belongs to me, and only me!”
“You’re really full of yourself as always,” Nene shook her head in dismay, but she then smiled. “...But it’s true that no one can replace you.”
“Fufu, that’s right, no one can replace our trustworthy chairman,” Rui added to Nene’s words, and placed a hand on my shoulder. “...But we’re always here to listen to you if you need to talk, Tsukasa-kun.”
I was taken aback by Rui’s unexpected display of empathy, and I took a moment to come out with my response, “...Don’t worry, I’ll be fine! This is nothing compared to the difficulties I’ve been through on my path to be worthy of being called a star!”
“...That’s reassuring,” Rui smiled gently at me.
My heart started pounding, but thankfully, I don’t think it was loud enough for Rui to hear. How was I supposed to react when he was standing so close to me, and looking at me with kind eyes like that?
I immediately shook away my feelings.
Now that my worries for the show were properly being addressed, I had to think about finding a way to be visible again as Emu said. But where on Earth am I supposed to find a hint?
Not even KAITO knew about anything. Even when he and the others in the Sekai were probably the most unexplainable existences in our lives right now...
____________________________________________________________________________
It only took a few days for an unfamiliar face to arrive at our stage. It was a man with platinum blonde hair and jewel-like amber eyes who was a little taller than me but still shorter than Rui. He was wearing an auburn blazer that didn’t come from any of the schools in the area.
“Hello, it’s nice to meet you all,” the man politely bowed to all four of us. “My name is Julius Takazaki. You may simply call me Yuri.”
Both Nene and I were completely taken aback.
“A foreigner!?” I yelled in disbelief. But I immediately apologized when I realized it was impolite. “—Ah, sorry…”
“That’s right! Yuri-kun is half-Japanese and half-German! He was the first person who came to our auditions, and Rui-kun knew right away he was the only one!” Emu then spread out her arms in an ever-so familiar gesture. “Wonderhoy, Yuri-kun~!”
“Wonderhoy~!” Takazaki responded to Emu with equal enthusiasm as he imitated her. “I’m really glad to be here! I might just be a substitute, but I’m hoping to learn as much as I can from all of you.”
“Fufu, that’s promising,” Rui said with amusement in his tone. “I hope you’re not expecting this job to be easy, Yuri-kun.”
“Who do you think you’re talking to? I’ve known of your spartan ways since middle school, but even so, I have always dreamed of making shows with you, Rui!” Takazaki claimed while pumping a fist with fervor. “I was really happy when I heard you started making shows with a troupe, and I knew I had to take any chance I had to join.”
“Middle school?” I tilted my head with a questioning gaze. “Do you two know each other?”
“That’s right,” Takazaki was the one to reply to my question. “We were schoolmates in middle school. Rui was the one who introduced us to shows and taught me all there was to know about shows.”
“Yuri-kun had to travel out of the country not too long after we met though, so we never had the opportunity to make shows together,” Rui continued after him. “Fufu, I’m more than pleased to hear that you still have an interest in shows.”
“What do you mean? I’ll never be able to forget that marvelous show you directed back in middle school even if I tried!” Takazaki slapped his chest with a tone that continued to be full of vigour.
“Oh? Rui’s middle school shows?” I uttered with interest. “Huh… I want to see that.”
Rui glanced at me briefly, before rolling his eyes to the ground, “...Maybe someday.”
Rui seemed a little sad. I raised a brow at the change in his expression, but the topic was changed before I could ask.
“—But in any case, I’m really a big fan of each one of you!” Takazaki claimed, and he looked over to Emu, who became startled at the sudden attention she received. “Ootori, your acrobatic talent blew me away the moment I first watched your shows! I started dabbling in some exercises myself so I’ll be able to pull off the amazing stunts you can so easily perform!”
“Oh, hehe… thanks,” Emu scratched her temple in embarrassment. “But you can just call me Emu, Yuri-kun!”
“Ah, alright,” Takazaki grew bashful as he scratched his head. “...Emu it is, then.”
Rather than his loudness, I found myself fascinated by how expressive this person was. With the ability to cycle between personalities like that, he would surely be a good actor.
And then, Takazaki shifted his attention to Nene, who also became startled when their eyes locked with each other.
“And Nene Kusanagi—!” Takazaki started, taking a couple of steps closer to Nene. “Rui brought me to one of your shows in the past, and you continue to fascinate me more and more with your wonderful singing voice! It’s somehow grown even better over the years!”
But the closer Takazaki drew, the further away Nene retreated from him. Nene ended up hiding behind Rui, who happened to be standing closest to her at that time.
Takazaki seemed hurt, “—Oh, I’m sorry, did my words offend you…?”
“N-No…” Nene tugged at Rui’s sleeves, signalling him to talk in her stead.
As someone who had been with her for a long time, Rui caught her message instantly, “...Sorry, Yuri-kun. Nene is quite shy, so it’ll take some time for her to warm up to you. Plus, the fact that you’ve complimented her just made her even more embarrassed.”
“Oh, is that so… I’m sorry about that,” Takakaki’s expression fell, but it rose back up not too long after. “That’s fine, I understand. I hope we’ll get along soon, Kusanagi.”
“...Mhm,” Nene’s head poking out from behind Rui’s back could only nod.
Seeing as I was the only one left who Takazaki had yet to shower praises on, I enthusiastically jumped onto the stage and placed both of my hands on my hips. My actions caught Takazaki’s attention, who had turned towards me when my feet landed and made a loud thump as they came into contact with the creaking planks of the stage.
“Fufufu…! You must have saved the best for last, huh, Takazaki?” I said in a loud voice leaking with anticipation. “Go ahead, praise me all you want, for I am the future star loved by everyone, Tsukasa Tenma!”
But instead of the same excited eyes that were thrown in Emu, Nene and Rui’s directions, I was met with clouded eyes that were filled with apathy.
“Ah...” Takazaki was clearly forcing a smile. “You said he was pretty loud and flashy even outside shows, but I didn’t think he’d be this bad...”
Rui chuckled, “Fufu, he’s quite the interesting person, isn’t he?”
“Oi!!” was my first reaction. “What’s with the sudden loss of energy here!?”
“Ah, sorry,” Takazaki waved his hand, dismissing the air from before. “I guess your acting is pretty good. You manage to pull off Rui’s difficult directions pretty well.”
“...What’s with that bias...” I stared at Takazaki with a mix of disbelief and annoyance. “Surely you have to be a fan of mine too—!”
“Well…” Takazaki’s eyes wandered elsewhere away from me. “To be honest, I don’t really have anything to say about you. You are a great actor, but…”
Takazaki’s eyes abruptly found themselves back on me, and he imitated my pose and pointed a finger at me with a cocky smile that had just formed on his lips.
“I’m pretty sure I can do better than you!” Takazaki declared confidently. “My aim is to become the lead actor in the spotlight someday, where I’ll perform Rui’s directions with 20,000% of my vigour! I’ve practiced long and hard all these years for that day to come!”
I should have been more annoyed with this new guy who was clearly stealing away my spotlight. But for some reason, I didn’t find it in myself to yell at him. I had no words to say in fact, so I just returned his gaze with silence.
...If I disappeared and no one was able to see me anymore, then this person should be able to fill my spot with that enthusiasm. If he can say 20,000% without any hesitation, even after knowing Rui as a person, maybe he would do a lot better than me as a chairman.
My silence didn’t go unnoticed however, as several brows were lifted at my absence of a response. Rui ended up being the one to break the tense atmosphere between us.
“—Isn’t that great, Tsukasa-kun?” Rui directed his question at me with a nonchalant smile. “With a rival as passionate as Yuri-kun, you’ll surely work even harder to make a better production.”
“...Y-Yeah, that’s true!” I agreed. “I guess we should get started with practice now.”
“Oh, but I was thinking that it would be best if Yuri-kun had a tour of our workspace and the backstage first,” Rui suggested, and turned his head towards Emu, “Nene, Emu-kun, could you do this?”
“If Emu is there, then I don’t mind…” Nene said from behind Rui.
“Let’s go together then, Nene-chan!” Emu energetically said as she grabbed Nene’s hand. “I’ll show you the main office first, Yuri-kun! This way, this way!”
“Ah, okay!” Yuri followed after the two girls, and the three of them were out of earshot not too long after.
Rui then turned towards me. I was still standing on the stage, and my eyes had absentmindedly followed the backs of those three that had just left as they disappeared further into the distance.
“Tsukasa-kun?” Rui called my name.
“Ah,” Rui’s voice snapped me out of my trance, and I turned my head to face him. “What’s wrong?”
“...Are you alright?” there was not a hint of a smile on Rui’s face, and he seemed genuinely concerned instead.
“I think I am…” I responded, adding the ‘I think’ because I still had my uncertainties.
“...If you’re worried about him taking your place, I assure you he won’t,” Rui gave me a reassuring smile. “After all, you’ve come all this way with us. I’m sure you’ll show him an acting far superior than his that he’ll have no choice but to learn from you instead.”
The warm look in Rui’s eyes only served to make me feel uncomfortable, however.
“...Yeah, you’re right.”
There had been a strange feeling that was growing heavy in my chest. Was I sad? No, was this relief…?
—I don’t know at all.
____________________________________________________________________________
I went to school like normal the next day. But something strange had happened—
No one responded to my ‘good morning’ when I shouted the greeting loud and clear as I always did.
I had a bad feeling. But I proceeded to take a seat at my table, holding out hope that this time it was just a silly prank my classmates had planned. No one came over to talk to me or made mention of my name, so I was left to boredly stare out the window as I waited for homeroom to begin.
After what felt like ages, our homeroom teacher entered the class with his attendance book in hand.
“—Okay, let’s begin roll call!”
Finally. This way, I could ascertain for sure if it was a prank. Because the teacher surely wouldn’t ignore me given how strict he was.
It didn’t take long for him to reach my name that was near the middle of the list. I gulped in anticipation. If the teacher ignored my hand here, then that meant my presence in this school was doomed too...
But instead, my name was skipped.
It never came, even after he concluded the roll call. No one noticed either that a table was skipped.
—WHAT WAS GOING ON!!!???
____________________________________________________________________________
“RUI—-!!!”
I slammed open the door to the rooftop, where I found the one person I was searching for. He was tinkering with one of his inventions up here again.
But now the question was - could he still see me?
“Fufu, you’re extra energetic today, Tsukasa-kun,” Rui remarked with a smile full of amusement. “Did you find a fun new production idea? I think you’ll be even more excited to hear what I have for you today, though.”
I was overcome with relief when our eyes met and he reacted as he usually did.
“...Phew,” I exhaled, feeling at ease. I proceeded to walk over towards him where I settled down next to him in front of the gridded fences. Rui’s eyes followed me curiously.
“...That’s unusual, you didn’t bring your handkerchief today?” Rui questioned with a puzzled look on his face.
“Some things happened, you see…” I said tiredly, and my eyes found their way to the robot Rui had been working on.
I noticed that it closely resembled the robot he made of me during the Christmas party in Sekai. But it no longer had the red party hat on its head and the red ball that served as its Reindeer nose. It was instead dressed conspicuously in an attire similar to my stage costume.
I couldn’t help but stare at it suspiciously, “Rui, this robot is…”
“Fufu, I’m glad it caught your attention,” Rui got up to his feet and gave the robot a gentle tap on its head. “Allow me to introduce you. This is the refurbished Tsukasa-robo.”
“Oh, so it’s completed! I owe you my gratitude, Rui!” I perked up. “With this, I should be able to converse with the people who can’t see me…! You’ll still need to teach me the controls, though.”
“Don’t worry, I’ve built a smartphone app that’ll allow you to control the robot with ease,” Rui reassured me. “Some features are restricted since it’s a simplified interface, so you won’t be able to pull off the sophisticated moves Nenerobo is capable of. But you’ll still be able to do basic things like speech-to-text though.”
“I didn’t get half of what you said, but it’s good to hear that it’s simple,” I made my way over to Rui. “When do you think you’ll be able to install the app on my smartphone?”
“I’ll need my PC to transfer the files, so we can swing by my place after today’s practice,” Rui explained. “But for now, you can test run it using my smartphone. I have it installed here.”
Rui handed me his phone, and the screen turned horizontal and a gamepad of a controller was on display. There was also a speech box at the bottom of the screen. It grabbed my attention first, so I tapped on it and the keyboard appeared.
I typed in the words, ‘It is I, Tsukasa Tenma!’—
“It is I, Tsukasa Tenma!” a robotic version of my voice played from the robot’s mouth.
I was stunned. I was expecting a computer-generated voice, but it was distinctive enough for me to recognize that it was my own voice.
“...Rui,” I said the name of the man who was feigning innocence behind me. “When did you record my voice for this?”
“I simply compiled the recordings of your voice that I had,” Rui justified himself. “Rest assured. I had your consent for all of them.”
“Oh, you mean from our shows that we’ve recorded?” I asked curiously.
But Rui made a troubled expression, “...They weren’t mostly from our recorded shows, actually.”
“...Don’t tell me you really have been recording me in secret.”
“I said I had your consent, didn’t I? How cruel of you to doubt me - I wouldn’t lie to you, Tsukasa-kun,” Rui said in a disappointed voice that was clearly faked. “Remember the few times I asked if you’d let me record your voice for some test runs of my machines?”
“Ah, yeah. But there weren’t many of them, though,” I noted as I crouched down in front of the robot to observe its features closer. “It would’ve been easier for you to take them from our show recordings.”
“...It wouldn’t sound like your usual voice that way,” Rui’s voice suddenly dropped. “...If I end up being unable to hear your voice again, the voice I would want to hear the most is probably the voice you use when you’re just being yourself around us.”
I was a little taken aback about witnessing Rui’s sentimental side. I didn’t think someone as insensitive and outrageous as him would ever care about the small details like that.
“I see,” was all I said. It would have made the atmosphere even heavier if we lingered on this topic, so I ended it there.
“...Come to think of it, you said that some things had happened,” Rui had caught my drift to end the discussion of the topic. “May I ask what it’s about?”
“Ah right, about that…” I crossed my arms and frowned. “...It seems like my classmates can’t see me now either.”
Rui’s expression immediately dropped, and he narrowed his brows, “...Even your classmates?”
“Yeah,” I said. Unfortunately, changing the topic didn’t seem to have any effect in lifting the tension in the air. The words I had to say next would probably leave the worst impact, though, “There’s one more thing…”
“What is it?”
“I’ve disappeared from the roll call sheet, it seems,” I said.
At that moment, I regretted not thinking more about whether I should have told Rui about it. He wouldn’t have found out since he rarely spoke to my classmates anyway.
...Because now, Rui looked even more devastated than ever.
“...So not only have you become invisible to your classmates, but your existence has been erased from the roll call too?” the words spilled out of Rui.
“That appears to be the case,” I nodded. “No one thought it was weird either that my name was missing, too.”
“...So, if it happens to us, then…” Rui pursed his lips in growing frustration. “...Sorry, I need some time to process this alone.”
“...Ah, okay…” was all I could say.
I then handed Rui his smartphone back, and he went back to sitting on the ground he had previously been occupying. I glanced at him momentarily before settling to make my way back to my classroom to grab my lunch.
I only just realized how insensitive it was of me to not think about the consequences such a thing would have on Wonderlands x Showtime.
____________________________________________________________________________
I met up with Rui and Nene outside the school gates as usual, but this time Emu was together with them. Rui seemed to have gone back to his normal self, as he was back to jabbing me with insensitive remarks once again on our way to Phoenix Wonderland.
I contemplated informing Emu and Nene about the current situation. But after witnessing Rui’s reaction, I couldn’t bring myself to tell either of them about it.
Nothing eventful happened at practice, and the newcomer Takazaki integrated smoothly into our routine as we expected. His acting skills were nothing to scoff at - he captured the emotions of each scene perfectly, delivered his lines with impact and made little to no mistakes in the dance choreography. I quickly came to acknowledge him as a far better actor than myself.
Normally, I would have told myself I wouldn’t lose to him. But this time, the thought of competing with him didn’t even cross my mind. I just felt numb.
Towards the end of the practice session, Rui approached me.
“...Tsukasa-kun, you’re coming over to have your app installed today, right?”
“Ah, yeah,” I responded. To be honest, I had forgotten all about it.
But from the solemn look on Rui’s face, we were probably also discussing the matter that we left hanging at the rooftop.
After practice concluded, the five of us walked home together in the sunset, and I followed Rui and Nene all the way to their houses. Nene went to her own house instead of joining us in Rui’s house because she had to complete her homework that was due on the next day.
We went over to Rui’s garage, where I handed Rui my smartphone and he plugged it into his PC.
The only sound that filled the room at present was the sound of Rui clicking his mouse and occasionally typing at his keyboard. None of us spoke a word to each other, until several minutes passed and my smartphone was given back to me.
“I’ve installed it,” Rui said monotonously. “I’ll bring Tsukasa-robo over to Phoenix Wonderland. We can test run it there tomorrow.”
“Thanks, Rui,” I expressed my gratitude to him.
Rui’s gaze then fell downcast, and I could sense that he wanted to speak about the matter that was left hanging in the air this whole time.
“...Tsukasa-kun,” he uttered my name stoically. “Let's try talking to KAITO-san about this again. He might at least have something we can go off from.”
From the way Rui worded his suggestion, he was fully aware of the fact that KAITO was just as clueless as the two of us were. But it was probably our only hope at this time, when they were the only supernatural beings capable of exchanging words with us.
“...Okay.” I agreed, and I navigated to the song, ‘The World Hasn’t Even Started Yet’ on my phone and pressed play on the UI controls.
____________________________________________________________________________
The two of us landed in Sekai at the usual place in front of the show tent. KAITO was nowhere to be seen, but we did find Miku sitting on the coloured blocks with the stuffed animals. They were drawing something with crayons on their respective pieces of paper.
The fastest way to find a person was to ask, which Rui seemed to agree with because he was already making his way in their direction. I wordlessly followed suit.
“—Miku-kun,” Rui called her name, gaining her attention.
“Oh, Rui-kun, Tsukasa-kun!” Miku perked up at the sight of the two of us. “You aren’t with Emu-chan and Nene-chan today?”
“Not today, unfortunately,” Rui smiled wryly. “We were hoping to talk to KAITO-san. Do you know where he is?”
“KAITO?” Miku turned her body to face the both of us properly. “He’s rehearsing a pretty long show with Len now, so it’ll be a while until he’s free.”
“Is that so…” Rui cupped his chin in contemplation. He must have been thinking about who he could ask.
The idea popped into my mind at that moment. Although Miku was unarguably the most childish and incomprehensible virtual singers in the Sekai, she was still a being who was native to this bizarre place.
“...Miku,” I said her name. “There’s something we’d like to consult you both about.”
“Consult me about? If there’s anything I can help with, then of course!” Miku pushed aside her papers and crayons and gestured to the unoccupied blocks next to her. “Come sit down next to me, Tsukasa-kun, Rui-kun~ ♪”
I nodded, and went to sit on the block directly next to Miku. Rui in turn took a seat next on the empty block next to me.
“So, what is it about?” Miku began dangling her legs as she eagerly looked over at the two of us.
I explained the situation to Miku, and she turned out to have been clueless about the ordeal this whole time. I couldn’t blame KAITO for not filling her in - we didn’t even update him on the situation because we didn’t think it would get this bad either.
“Hmmm, is that so,” Miku was surprisingly composed though, albeit a little troubled. “So right now, Tsukasa-kun’s classmates can’t see or hear you, and don’t even remember you…”
“Yeah,” I nodded. “Do you have any clues as to what is going on?”
Miku held her chin and mumbled gibberish to herself, “Mmmmmm, I can think of something. But no matter how I think about it, it’s impossible…”
“Anything is fine,” it was Rui’s turn to step in. “We might end up forgetting Tsukasa-kun too if this goes on for any longer.”
“That’s true, isn’t it…” Miku frowned and dropped her hands onto her lap. “...The only possibility I can think of is that some strong feelings in Tsukasa-kun are starting to take form.”
I raised a brow, “My strong feelings?”
“Mhm,” Miku nodded. “It’s incredibly rare, but there are times when a person’s feelings are strong enough to result in something impossible. When those feelings are strong enough, they start to become a reality for the person themselves. Just like this Sekai.”
Rui seemed as if he was properly considering Miku’s words, but in the end he only shook his head, “...I don’t understand, how exactly does that relate to our situation right now?”
“What I’m trying to say is…” Miku started to seem increasingly uncomfortable. “Tsukasa-kun, you don’t happen to have strong feelings to disappear and be erased from everyone’s memories, do you…?”
I felt everyone’s intense gaze on me. The only thing I could think is, what, what, what?
“—WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!” I jolted up. “A-Are you trying to say I brought all this on myself!?”
“That is the only possibility I can think of… A feeling like that can come true if it’s strong enough,” Miku claimed, and then began fidgeting with her thumbs. “But it can’t be, right? That’s why I didn’t bring it up...”
“Obviously that can’t be the case,” I emphasized. “Why would I want something like that? In the first place, what I want most is to become a star who’ll make shows that’ll make everyone smile! If I disappear, I won’t be able to do that at all!”
“...Plus, this Sekai was born from those exact feelings,” Rui added to my point, but he was still propping his chin up in doubt. “...But it is pretty much our only substantial piece of evidence right now…”
My eyebrow twitched in disbelief, “You aren’t seriously considering it, are you, Rui?”
“I’ll take note of it,” Rui said simply. “I doubt it’s the case, though.”
“Don’t take note of it then…” I retorted, and covered my mouth in distaste. “Kgh, just the thought of it makes me uneasy… That’s not star-like behaviour at all.”
“Uwaaah! I’m so sorry, Tsukasa-kun!” Miku immediately apologized. “I shouldn’t have said that…!”
The stuffed animals in the vicinity began to gather around my feet. Saki’s stuffed bunny had somehow found its way directly in front of my face.
“Tsukasa-kun, okay?” the bunny asked.
It said in its high-pitched squeaky voice, and I nodded, “I’m okay. It just isn’t very pleasant to hear things like that.”
Upon hearing my words, the rabbit stuffed animal at my feet pointed its limb at Miku accusingly, “Miku-chan, mean!”
“But, but...!” Miku pouted. “Rui-kun told me to say it in the first place!”
The same stuffed animal appeared surprised, and it immediately averted its hand to point accusingly at Rui who was seated on my other side, “Rui-kun, bad!!!”
But instead of playing along with them as he usually does, Rui was quiet and appeared to be in deep thought.
I was half-expecting that reaction, because Rui was lacking the usual energy and drive he had. But the others in the room were unable to see that, it seemed.
“...Sorry, but I’m not in the mood to play with you all,” Rui looked down at them with a sad smile. “I need to find a way to stop Tsukasa-kun from disappearing.”
“Rui-kun…” It was Miku’s turn to be worried. “I’m sorry. I wish I could be of more help.”
Rui then dug his face into his palms, probably out of the frustration of not being able to come up with any explanation for the situation at hand.
—It was upsetting to me having to see Rui like this. It was unlike him to be so negative in the first place. But what confused me the most was why it disturbed him to this extent. If he was going to forget, it should be me who is troubled, not him.
So I decided to speak up to encourage him—
“Rui, aren’t you getting too worked up over this?” I scooted over towards him, and placed a hand on his shoulder. “It’s not like anything bad will happen to you and Wonderlands x Showtime if I disappear. You have Takazaki now too. In fact, you’ll all forget about me, and things will still be normal for all of you.”
“Huh…?”
Rui was looking at me with widened eyes. His expression was one that seemed to be filled with shock and disbelief. Although it unnerved me and I couldn’t understand the reason behind those apparent emotions, I was still determined to make my point.
“It’s an issue I’ll have to worry about on my own, since I won’t be able to be a future star if no one can see me...” I mumbled to myself. “But I’ll face it when that time comes! For now, we should focus on delivering the best show to our audience!”
“Tsukasa-kun…”
“—How could you say such things at a time like this…?”
Rui’s words confused me. Was he actually worried about me?
“—Don’t worry about me!” I hit my chest with my fist. “I’ve been through worse!”
“That’s not it!” Rui shouted, and I was left stunned. He roughly grabbed both of my shoulders, and looked at me desperately. “I’m talking about you! Aren’t you scared at all!? If we all end up forgetting about you, you’ll be all alone!”
“That…” I looked at Rui’s uncharacteristic expression in bewilderment.
Although Rui made it sound like a big deal, I didn’t actually think much of the consequences of this to myself. All that happens is that I would end up alone. No one would be affected, so wasn’t that fine?
It would be detrimental to my dream of becoming a star, but I would just have to find a way out of it myself then.
The raw emotions saturating Rui’s expression gradually abated, and he eventually loosened his grip over my cardigan, “...I’m sorry, you must be in the most shock out of all of us.”
“...Yeah,” I said, and my gaze found its way to the ground. “I don’t think I’ve actually processed it at all. I said that to you without thinking. I’m sorry, Rui.”
To be honest, I mostly regretted telling Rui about this.
He would have been in less pain if he didn’t know.
Since Rui had nothing more to say, I decided to leave. Rui had stayed where he was when I left, still fully intent on meeting KAITO to discuss the issue.
____________________________________________________________________________
In the end, we still couldn’t figure anything out.
...And on the day of our first showing, we were greeted by a cruel revelation.
“Tsukasa Tenma? Who’s that?”
Emu, Nene and Rui’s eyes were all wide open in front of Takazaki. I had just arrived at the stage and was standing directly behind the three of them. His eyes were constantly shifting between the three of them, but they didn’t seem to capture my figure at all.
With this, my dream to become a star was crushed.
I already knew the people in Phoenix Wonderland were already unable to see me, because I had attempted to greet a staff member earlier but I was ignored. But seeing my own showmates making such shocked faces finally made the realization sink - that I would never become a star now.
“Eeeh, what’s this!” Emu was the first to speak up, and there was a smile on her face that was trying to laugh off the situation as a petty joke. “I know you and Tsukasa-kun have a super intense rivalry going on, but you can’t just pretend not to know him, y’know~?”
“I’m sorry, Emu, but I really don’t know who you’re talking about,” Takazaki said with a troubled frown.
“H-He’s the loud guy who’s always making weird poses! You met him on your first day here!” There was not a hint of shyness coming from Nene at all, although she still had her reservations about being around Takazaki. “He’s our chairman, remember…!”
“But it was just the three of you when I first joined…” Takazaki claimed. “There wasn’t really a chairman… You were kind of the acting chairman though, Rui.”
“...Nene, Emu-kun, I need to talk to both of you personally,” Rui brought one hand to Nene’s shoulder, and the other to Emu’s back. He shot me a quick glance before looking back at Takazaki, “We’ll be back, Yuri-kun.”
I caught the message, and grabbed my arms strongly. I had to see not only Rui’s face, but Emu and Nene’s too.
Deep inside, I wished they would just forget, too.
“...Alright,” Takazaki nodded.
Although Takazaki seemed to have many questions, he obeyed Rui’s words and said nothing as he watched them leave. I naturally chased after them. Rui led us to an old fountain where there were not many visitors around. Rui then stopped in his tracks and turned around to face me. Both Emu and Nene were still shaking in disbelief.
“...It seems the strange phenomenon has spread to here, too,” Rui said calmly, but you can hear the iciness in his voice.
“Yeah,” I nodded. “I don’t think I’ll be able to perform today.”
“...Hey, Tsukasa-kun, Rui-kun…” Emu raised her head and looked at me with a trembling expression. “What’s going on…? Why doesn’t Yuri-kun remember you…?”
“...I’m sorry, Emu, Nene,” I smiled sadly. It was inevitable for them to find out - I should have made the wiser decision to tell them earlier. “It seems that people will forget me as well.”
“What… That’s…” Nene dug her fingers into her other arm. “Then, what about us…?”
Rui looked away and gritted his teeth.
“...It may or may not happen,” I bluntly said. “But don’t let it get to you. You all have a show to deliver today.”
Emu lunged forward and grabbed fistfuls of my costume, and her eyes were filled to the brim with tears, “H-How are we supposed to continue the show without you, Tsukasa-kun!?”
It’s because of me that Emu was like this. And I was only going to make it worse with my ugly pride—
“The show must go on,” I said firmly. “...I’m sorry. I’ll support you all however I can, but as your chairman, I’ll tell you guys this: don’t let the audience down.”
“...I’m not doing this.” was Nene’s only answer. “There’s no meaning if you’re not there with us.”
“I agree with Nene.” Rui chimed in.
I gently removed Emu away from my chest, “I know it’s selfish of me… But, everyone has come all this way to see us. The purpose of Wonderlands x Showtime is to make everyone smile, so we can’t stop here.”
“But what’s the point if you aren’t smiling, Tsukasa-kun!?” Emu shouted with desperation.
“...What do you mean, Emu?” I smiled gently down at her, and placed both my hands firmly on her shoulders. “I love shows more than anything in this world. That’s why, I’ll be really happy if you’ll all proceed with the show.”
My words seemed to have struck a chord in the three of them somewhere, as their expressions changed from a reluctant one to faces that were now considering my words. Rui was the first to respond - albeit with a shaky sigh, and he walked up to me and proceeded to hold up both of my hands.
“...If that’s what’ll make you happy, I’ll do it,” he said. “...But I’ll still find a way to return things back to normal. For sure.”
“...Thank you,” I muttered as I closed my eyes. “I’ll leave this to you, Rui.”
Rui’s hands that were wrapped around mine had been trembling, and they had lingered on my hands for some time before he finally let go of them. He then spun around and placed his hands on Emu and Nene’s backs. Emu looked up at him, and back at me, and nodded unconfidently. Nene, on the other hand, had her eyes fixated on the creaking wooden floor the whole time, but didn’t resist as Rui took them along with him.
Rui took one last glance at me before making his way and not looking back even once. I felt relieved that they still found it in themselves to continue the show, although their hearts were still obviously filled with hesitation.
After spending a few minutes to adjust myself to the current situation, I proceeded to make my way back to the stage. But this time, it wasn’t to stand alongside them, but to stand in the audience seats and support them. I have never watched a show performed by Wonderlands x Showtime, so I had to admit the idea of spectating was unnerving to me.
There were still a couple of hours until the start of the first show of the day. But there was nothing in particular that I wanted to do until then, so I simply waited at the stage. At some point, I noticed Emu had stuck part of her face out from red curtains, and our eyes eventually met.
Even though I was standing relatively far from the stage, I can still sense the uneasiness in her gaze. I can empathize with the anxiety of delivering a show with a situation like this suddenly happening, so I couldn’t bring myself to scold her.
Instead, I crossed my arms and waved at her while sending a gentle smile in her direction. I wanted her to know that I would still be watching over her, even if I wasn’t there by their side.
It wasn’t enough to relieve Emu’s worries though, as her brows remained furrowed even as she nodded back at me. With that, she was now once again obscured from view by the red curtains.
The show eventually started, and my worries about the performance being affected came true. Emu took longer to respond to lines. Nene was fumbling over her words. Rui’s voice lost the emotion it wa supposed to have.
But the play was successfully brought back together by Takazaki, who ad-libbed by injecting more enthusiasm and energy into his character and throwing offhand remarks at the right timing to pull Emu and the others into his pace.
Takazaki was truly an amazing actor. Emu, Nene and Rui were back to normal again as the show approached its second-half. I couldn’t help but lament my own helplessness when it came to helping my showmates. All I did was make them worry, and my situation even ended up affecting their performance negatively.
Although I didn’t want to stay any longer because of the growing helplessness I was feeling in my chest, I resolved to stay until the last show was delivered, because I had made a promise to watch over them.
With Takazaki around, none of them were able to come around to talk to me even during the lunch break. Although I did notice them occasionally glancing over at me as they acted, each of them sharing the same gaze overflowing with uneasiness. They weren’t looking at me with the same trusting eyes that were directed in Takazaki’s direction.
I didn’t like it. I was making everyone worried and unhappy. It shouldn’t be this way. I’m supposed to be the chairman and future star who protects everyone’s smiles…
...Takazaki would make a far better chairman than me.
Suddenly, the thought of disappearing became ever the more appealing.
I said to Rui that I wouldn’t give up—But what was the point of it anymore?
Isn’t it easier to just accept the way things were?
These thoughts were unsuitable for a star, so I have to get rid of them. At the end of the final show, I left Phoenix Wonderland without letting anyone know and didn’t bother collecting my belongings. I put my phone on silent.
____________________________________________________________________________
I arrived home to find Saki lounging in the living room writing lyrics on the sofa. I couldn’t suppress the smile that formed on my lips at the sight of her working hard to achieve her dreams.
“Welcome back—!” When Saki noticed me at the door to the living room, her mouth fell in surprise, “Wait, onii-chan? I thought you were coming home late today.”
“I’m back, Saki. The show ended earlier than we expected,” I replied as I removed my outerwear and hung it on the coat rack.
Seeing Saki reminded me that the same fate might befall my family soon. Reality was finally sinking in, and what I found myself most worried about was whether Saki would be fine without me. Although her condition has mostly improved, the possibility of a relapse was still there. If our parents weren’t home, who would bring her to the hospital?
Her childhood friends immediately came to mind. Saki had lost contact with them in the past, but the four of them recently came back together and formed a band. Now Saki spent most of her days practicing with her bandmates, and they’ve started staying over more often.
Saki spent more time with them than me, so it was unlikely she would be alone on her own for extended periods of time. If she was hospitalized again, Ichika and the others should be able to freely visit her now that their relationship has improved. It filled me with relief knowing that Ichika and the others would be able to take care of her.
But, that was just my own convenient interpretation. I had to ask her straight out to confirm.
“Saki,” I walked over to her, and propped myself down on the spot next to her.
“Hm? What is it, onii-chan?” Saki tilted her head towards me with a bright smile as she removed her headphones from her ears.
“Let’s say, if I wasn’t around…” My eyes fluttered close. “Would you still be happy?”
Saki immediately frowned, and she put down the musical score she had been writing on onto the table.“...Are you planning to go somewhere for a long time soon?”
“In the near future, definitely. A star can’t just stay in one place, after all!” I exclaimed. “...But I was worried about you.”
“Well, it will be lonely, but…” Saki lowered her head briefly before looking at me with a big smile. “If onii-chan is happy, then I’m happy too!”
Although there was a bit of sadness in it, Saki’s smile wasn’t forced like it was in the past. She was able to smile from the bottom of her heart now, even when faced with an unpleasant situation.
I’m so relieved.
“Is that so.”
“I’m always cheering for you, onii-chan,” Saki continued to smile at me. Her smile made me feel warm in my chest. “So don’t give up! I’ll be fine, so chase after your dreams to your heart’s content!”
The reason I wanted to become a star in the first place - It was for Saki’s smile. But now she should be strong enough to keep smiling even through the difficulties she may face in the future without me around.
If you’re still able to smile like that without tugging at my sleeves and trying your best to stifle your tears - I’m sure you’ll be fine.
“...Thank you, Saki.”
It was a good thing that Saki and everyone else would forget about me once they became unable to see me. She would probably be in a lot more pain if she discovered she couldn’t see her brother anymore.
It’s a lot better if you don’t have to go through that.
____________________________________________________________________________
I fell asleep right after having dinner with my family, and the next morning arrived. When I unlocked my smartphone, I noticed I had many missed calls and texts from everyone in Wonderlands x Showtime. I had delayed getting back to them because I didn’t want to hear their miserable voices through the phone.
I decided I would talk to them later today and find a way to put their worries to rest.
I went downstairs later than usual. My mother was at the kitchen tabletop, washing the dishes.
“Good morning, my dearest mother! It sure is quite the beautiful morning, just perfect for a star and his family I must say!” ” I said enthusiastically, but she didn’t turn around.
Did she have earphones plugged in? But she never enjoyed listening to music that way.
Fearing the worst, I made my way up to her and called for her, “Mom…?”
There was still no response. Even though I was standing directly next to her, her eyes didn’t even seem to capture my figure.
Ah, so it’s even reached my family.
“Good morning, mom!” Saki’s voice was carried along the wind to my ears, and my mother turned her head in Saki’s direction.
“Good morning, Saki,” my mother was smiling warmly at her. “I’ve prepared breakfast already, so you should eat up before it gets cold.”
My mother couldn’t see me - I can confirm that now. But how about Saki?
I left my mother’s side and hurried over to the front of the table to greet my younger sister. But her eyes didn’t change when she saw me. In fact, she had right passed through me - physically.
Eh?
I was then inclined to look at the photos lined up on the shelf brackets. I noticed that in the photos where it was just me and Saki, only Saki had been in them..
I should have been sad that I was now gone from the family, but instead I just felt numb.
Everyone must have forgotten about me already, including my showmates in Wonderlands x Showtime. I don’t have anything else to do now here, so I decided to head on over to the Sekai.
I had a feeling that it was just the right place for me to go in this situation, and that no one would forget their memories of me over there. They were born from my feelings, after all, so it probably meant they were a part of me I would never lose even if I wanted to.
____________________________________________________________________________
“Tsukasa-kun?”
Miku was still able to see me. It made me happy to see her head perk up to my presence, unlike my family in the living room who didn't even bat an eye at me.
Although I would normally steer clear of speaking about grim topics like this, I felt that there was no reason to sugarcoat things anymore.
“Miku,” I smiled, but not because I was happy, but because I didn’t know what face I was supposed to make. “My family has forgotten about me.”
Miku’s expression fell, and she covered her mouth in disbelief, “...That can’t be…”
“Hey, you don’t have to look at me with such pitying eyes!” I hollered. “It’s not a big deal.”
But Miku’s gaze that remained train on me only grew sadder, “Tsukasa-kun…”
“Really, it isn’t,” I shook my head. “It’s strange, but I don’t feel sad or anything… No, I’m pretty sure I do feel a little sad, but I think I’m more relieved that no one would have to be sad.”
“...It’s just like Tsukasa-kun to think that way,” Miku still seemed troubled, however. “Is there anything I can do for you?”
“...I would rather not stay there anymore,” I admitted. “So is it okay if I stayed here instead?”
“...Of course it is,” Miku finally smiled.
____________________________________________________________________________
I wondered how long I would be able to live without food and water. The idea of dying because of lacking access to my necessities didn’t settle in well with me, but it was still the reality of my current predicament.
But I haven’t felt hungry for the whole day. It was the evening now, and my stomach hasn't growled for the whole day. I didn’t feel thirsty either.
I passed time by watching KAITO and everyone practicing their shows in the Wonderland Sekai. I didn’t have the energy to participate in their practice, so I simply watched them from afar. Miku would stop by me occasionally to ask me how I was doing.
Although I didn't do anything, I found myself mostly entertained throughout the day. Because I was so absorbed in my dreams, I never realized it, but it was already a lot of fun simply immersing myself in the lively atmosphere in the Wonderland Sekai. I was even able to forget about the fact that my family had forgotten about me, because my mind was hooked on the smiles on everyone’s faces here.
I didn’t mind just staying here forever if that was my fate. Even if the virtual singers and the stuffed animals become unable to see me, at least I’ll be able to continue watching them smile.
Out of nowhere, I suddenly heard a desperate voice crying out my name from outside the show tent.
“Tsukasa-kun…! Tsukasa-kun!”
It was Emu’s voice. I was shocked to hear her calling my name. I rose to my feet and intended to check outside to see if it was really her, but by then she was already in the show tent, panting and out of breath.
When Emu raised her head, I could see that her eyes had been red and brimming with tears. My heart clenched painfully at the sight of such a sad face. The cause of it was me, wasn’t it?
“...Tsukasa-kun—!” Emu immediately ran up to me and threw her arms around me. I ended up falling on my back from the impact. “S-Saki-chan, she…!”
“...I know,” I said solemnly. “She’s forgotten.”
Emu looked up at me through tears, “Isn’t there a way to return things to normal—!? I can’t stand it, it’s so lonely that no one knows Tsukasa-kun! I don’t want to forget about you!”
I didn’t actually care about reverting things back to the way they were. It didn’t matter to me because they would all just forget and be able to resume their daily lives as normal afterwards.
…Didn't that mean that the only way to bring back a smile to Emu's face was for her to forget about me?
If that was the case, then I wanted her to forget about me as soon as possible.
But if I said so, Emu would probably make the same expression Rui did that time. So I had to play along and find a way to help her forget.
“...There should be a way. We can’t give up yet,” I said as I grabbed her shoulders. “You’ll lend me a hand, right, Emu?”
“Tsukasa-kun…” Emu murmured my name with a frown. “...Mhm, we’ll find a way together…!”
I smiled down at her, and ran my fingers through her hair. My touch seemed to calm her down, as her body started to tremble less and her sniffling was gradually subsiding.
“Tsukasa!”
“Tsukasa-kun!”
The other two members of Wonderlands x Showtime showed up. Their expressions were just as dire as Emu’s, but there was no sign of tears on Rui’s face like on the two other girls.
“Nene-chan! Rui-kun!” Emu perked up upon noticing their arrival.
“If you’re here, does that mean your family too…” Rui’s expression turned even grimmer. “It was Aoyagi-kun on our end, but I had a bad feeling…”
“It can’t be…” Nene uttered in disbelief.
More than anything, it was their devastated faces that made me sad. I really didn’t know how to make them happy again. As if on cue, KAITO and Miku walked up to us from behind me.
“Welcome to Sekai, everyone,” KAITO said in a calm voice. “...I see that the situation with Tsukasa-kun has gotten even worse.”
“KAITO-san,” Rui said firmly. “Don’t you have any leads...? Anything will do—!”
KAITO held his chin in thought, but shook his head when he could come up with nothing, “...I’m sorry, Rui-kun.”
“We can’t just do nothing! We might forget about Tsukasa-kun tomorrow—!” Rui shouted. My heart ached at how upset he was. This was all my fault. “Isn’t there anything we can do!?”
I noticed in the corner of my eyes that Miku had a contemplative look on her face. I could sense that she was intending to remind Rui about the words she had said the other day. After everything that has happened, I had a feeling that she might have been right.
But I didn’t want her to say it. They wouldn’t be able to smile if they found out I actually had the feeling of "wanting to disappear and be forgotten” deep down. Even though I still wasn’t able to properly feel those feelings, I could sense that they were down in my being somewhere.
So I had to redirect the attention somehow. I remembered that this Sekai was an amusement park outside the tent, and that amusement parks were a fun place that made people smile—
“Ru—”
Before Miku could say his name, I interrupted her. “Calm down, Rui. How are you supposed to figure anything out when you’re that worked up?”
“I can’t calm down!” Rui continued to yell. “How can you stay so calm in the first place, Tsukasa-kun!?”
“...It’s hard for me too,” I claimed. It was really just hard for me to accept the grief on their faces. “But we have to stay calm.”
“Tsukasa-kun…” Rui looked at me sadly. “...Sorry.”
“...Don’t worry about it,” I beamed up at him. “...Let’s clear our minds for now! We’ll think about this afterwards!”
“Clear our minds…?” Emu asked.
“We’re in an amusement park, aren’t we?” I started. “I’m sure we’ll be able to clear our minds after we ride some attractions and enjoy ourselves.”
“...I don’t want to…” Nene looked away as she held her arm. “How can I have fun at a time like this…? We might even forget tomorrow—”
“It’s exactly why you should be having fun,” I insisted. “The most successful people are those who can still have fun in times of peril! You shouldn’t be succumbing like this!”
“...You may have a point,” Rui concurred. “It’s true that I don’t have any productive ideas in mind right now. As much as I don't want to just let it go, it might help me think clearer that way."
“...If Rui thinks it’s a good idea, then...” Nene was starting to give in.
The three of us then looked at Emu, who was still rubbing at her eyes in an attempt to wipe away her tears. I frowned at the sight of her miserable form.
“...Okay.” Emu was the last one to nod, although she was still covering her eyes.
“I’ll help you get on the attractions here, then,” KAITO said, stepping forward.
“Thanks, KAITO,” I thanked him.
WIth that, I placed a hand on Emu’s back and we left the show tent altogether. Miku was still standing in place behind us though, but no one had noticed that her face had remained unchanged all this time.
So I briefly glanced at Miku and raised a finger to my lips. Don’t tell anyone . Although her expression was still sad, she nodded.
____________________________________________________________________________
Outside the tent, the sky was dark. Both Rui and Nene were startled when they looked at the sky. The sky must have still been blue when they arrived, since it was 5 PM when I checked my smartphone earlier, meaning It was not nighttime yet in the real world.
KAITO guided us to the start of the impressive railways that extended all throughout the skies. A familiar purple train awaited us there.
We had been on the train before, and I could only recall some crazy events taking place… I could only hope it wouldn’t happen again.
But judging by the tension that still lingered in the atmosphere around us, I doubt Emu was in the right mind to pull any trouble now.
The five of us boarded the train. I sat next to Emu to make sure she wouldn’t end up doing anything reckless again. Nene and Rui sat together on the pair of passenger seats next to ours, and KAITO sat in front of both Emu and myself. There was no conductor in sight, but the train revved up its engine and began its tracks along the rails that were made up of a musical score.
We gradually reached a high enough altitude for us to have a good view of the stars that decorated the night skies.
“...That star…” Emu raised her head, and I noticed a faint sparkle in her eyes. “It looks like a giraffe…”
“Huh? A giraffe?” I brought my head closer to the window. There was a small yellow giraffe-shaped object shining dimly among the many stars. “...You’re right. It’s a tiny one, though.”
“...How strange,” I looked back to Rui, who had blurted out those words while staring at the stars from his side. “Stars are actually faraway celestial bodies. You shouldn’t be able to come close to them like this.”
“Fufu, these aren’t the same stars as in the real world, after all,” KAITO responded with a chuckle.
“Ah, Rui, look!” Nene pointed to the window on Rui’s side. “Doesn’t it look like those stars are sleeping on the cloud over there?”
“Oh, you’re right,” Rui looked at the direction Nene’s finger was pointing at. “Fufu, how strange. I’ve never heard of stars sleeping.”
“Eh? What’s that?” Emu asked, and she absentmindedly squeezed past my legs to head on over to Rui and Nene’s side.
“Oi, Emu!” I called for her as I followed after her. “You better not get too excited and throw yourself out the window again!”
Emu didn’t listen to my words though, and she went over to the passenger seat in front of Rui and Nene. Her eyes started sparkling even more when she pressed her face against the window, and a big smile formed on her face when she seemingly found the sight Nene was pointing to.
I took a seat on the chair next to Emu, and I tilted my head to see what Emu had been looking at.
Just as Nene had said, there was a flock of various-shaped stars gathered on the cloud. If you looked closely enough, they had faces, and their eyes were closed as they snored softly. Their little bodies were moving up and down with their breath.
“They’re so cute—!” Emu enthused and she pressed even harder on the glass.
“...Emu, did you even listen to a thing I said?” I deadpanned. “You’re going to fall that way.”
My words were left ignored, however. I sighed.
…But more than anything, I was relieved that she was smiling again.
KAITO then raised his voice to grab our attention, “Fufu, the stars up here are quite friendly, you know?”
Rui, Nene and myself turned to KAITO, and he lifted the window on his end. He then reached for a star close to him. The sound of the wind gushing in through the open window was what finally caught Emu’s attention.
KAITO then retracted his arm, closed the window with his free hand, and carefully opened up his curled fingers that secured the object he had taken in from outside.
All four of us rushed to him. His uncurled fingers revealed a bright star shaped like the kind of stars you would see a child’s comic book. It was sitting on his palm, seeming rather disoriented.
The star then stood up, and waved at us with marker pen-drawn hands.
“W-WHAT!?” I cried in surprise. “...These stars have hands…? I thought I’ve seen the impossible already…”
“Of all things, you’re surprised at their hands?” Nene looked at me with disappointment.
“Oh, there's one right in front of us! Hello there, Mr. Star!” Emu said and waved back at the star. “Do you have a name?”
“Unfortunately, they can’t speak,” KAITO smiled sadly, and he poked a finger at the star’s cheek. The star was beaming as it latched onto KAITO’s finger with its stick-like fingers. “...But there is something else they can do.”
“Something else?” Rui looked at KAITO with growing curiosity.
“Watch closely.”
With that, blue glowing particles began to gather around KAITO’s unoccupied hand, and a magician's wand materialised out of the glow. We had seen the trick before, so it was nothing out of the ordinary for us anymore.
KAITO then raised the wand, and the small star began to emit a warm glow. It started to dance in his palm, and sparkly dust was falling from its shining body onto KAITO's palm.
"It's sparkling…!" Emu's mouth fell wide open.
"Okay, now off you go," KAITO opened the window once again, and held out the palm with the dancing star on it.
The star then leaped off the palm and propelled itself out the window. It left a trail of stardust that sprinkled down to the floor, which faded away before hitting the ground.
But a surprising amount of stardust had been left behind in KAITO's palm, and he curled his fingers once more and abruptly snapped those fingers.
The stardust began diffusing from in between his fingers all throughout the train.
“It's… beautiful…” Nene uttered dazedly as her eyes were covered in the glitter.
Rui, on the other hand, had cupped his chin with an intrigued yet fascinated look,
“...Interesting. This is certainly a good idea for a show."
Seeing their fascinated expressions brought a smile to my face. I was relieved to see that they had mostly forgotten about their troubles.
The train then started to slow down, and it drew to a halt on one of the many clouds that hung over the Sekai. MEIKO and Luka had been standing atop the cloud, and behind them was the levitating merry-go-round.
MEIKO and Luka held their hands together, and stretched their left and right hands out respectively to welcome us.
“Welcome!” the two of them said in unison.
“It’s time to enjoy a ride on the fluffy horses~ ♪” Luka then added.
“MEIKO onee-san? And Luka onee-san too?” Emu raised her voice in surprise. “What are you two doing up here?”
“Fufu, we’re here to make sure all of you will have the best time here~” Luka drawled out. What was most surprising to me though, was the fact that she was somehow still awake.
“And you’ll need someone to keep all of you safe up in the air, right?” MEIKO said, and she grabbed ahold of both Emu and Nene’s hands, who were both standing in front of me and Rui. “Now come on here, let's board the merry-go-round!”
“Ah, w-wait!” Nene yelped, but she was helpless as she was the first to be strapped onto one of the mechanical horses.
“Hehe, it’s been a while!” Emu was enthusiastic, and instead of waiting for MEIKO, she jumped onto one of the horses herself. “And there we go!”
Thankfully, Luka was close to her and seemed to be watching her movements to ensure she could react in time if anything were to happen.
“O-Oi Emu! Don’t go moving around on your own, we’re high up in the sky y’know!?” I chided her.
“Fufu, you should let loose more, Tsukasa-kun,” Rui looked over at me with a smile. “Aren’t we supposed to be having fun?”
“Still, if anything happens to you guys…” I said uncomfortably as I crossed my arms.
“It’ll be fine, Tsukasa-kun! I’m here, aren’t I?” MEIKO said happily.
After she made sure Nene was carefully sitting on the horse, she made her way back to Rui and myself.
Suddenly, my feet were swept off the ground, and I could no longer feel the fluffiness of the cloud at my ankles.
“And special service for Tsukasa-kun himself! ☆ ” MEIKO had lifted me up in a bridal carry. I turned red in embarrassment. “Fufu, does this cheer you up?”
“Wha—!” I widened my eyes at MEIKO in disbelief. “How is this supposed to cheer me up!!”
“Isn't it nice to be pampered every now and then?” MEIKO said with a well-intentioned smile.
“Not! Where on Earth did you even get that idea!?” I shouted back.
I then noticed Rui had been staring at me with a rather confused look. But his gaze disappeared the moment Luka had gone over to his side and slung her arm around his.
…? What’s this weird feeling?
“Come on, you should join us too, Rui-kun~” Luka slurred her words as she pulled the 180 cm tall Rui along with her to the horse in front of mine. She may have been a lot stronger than I gave her credit for...
By the time I was set down on one of the horses, Rui had settled down on the horse in front of me as well. He still seemed to be in a bit of a daze though.
“Fufu, it sure is lively here,” KAITO commented.
I turned to KAITO, who MEIKO and Luka made their way over to, “Are you all not joining us?”
“Unfortunately not,” KAITO shook his head with a smile. “We have something quite special planned, you see.”
“Special?” Nene asked.
Before Nene could have her answer, the merry-go-round started moving at its usual, slow pace.
KAITO then turned on his heels and walked forward into the skies. I was about to warn him but to my surprise, he didn't fall like a normal person would have.
It should have been impossible to walk in air, but everytime he took a step forward, the lines of a musical score would form under his foot which served as a sort of solid ground for him to stand upon. He made his way to a point in the sky that was relatively far from us but where we could still see the smile on his face. He then lifted his wand, in a similar way a conductor would in an opera.
The amusement park ground then suddenly disappeared from our view and everything was enveloped in darkness. We couldn’t see anything around us either. The illumination of the stars in the sky and the vivid street lamps had completely disappeared, and the merry-go-round was suddenly drawn to a halt. We were all facing the same direction now.
Suddenly, a spotlight shone from the heavens. Miku was there, dressed in a black robe, standing on a flying broom.
“Ladies and Gentlemen!” Miku bowed in our directions, and then winked and snapped her fingers together. “It’s showtime~! ☆”
The spotlight disappeared again, and within a matter of seconds, we found ourselves in a scenery with a lot of white. The ground below us that used to house the show tent and the street lamps had disappeared, and we found ourselves in the interior of a white castle instead.
The ground that was replaced by the white marbled floor was a lot closer to us now. It seemed that the castle was floating, as through the large windows you could see a blue sky with white clouds floating through. The pink cloud that we previously stood on before boarding the merry-go-round remained in front of us, though.
KAITO then emerged from an archway. He was dressed in a purely white garment, with gold silk lining his lapel and sleeves. There was also a magnificent gold crown hanging upon his head.
Although Miku was no longer anywhere to be seen, Miku’s voice continued to resound in the air.
“—Long, long ago, there lived a selfish king,” Miku started. “He lived in his magnificent castle in the sky, and spent every morning praising himself in the mirror.”
KAITO made his way to a large mirror lying to one side of the hall that was mostly empty.
“Hmm, my form is as impressive as ever today too,” KAITO said with arrogance as he eyed his reflection.
Several stuffed animals then began filling the castle grounds from another room, and they were all running to KAITO.
“Great king, great king!” the flying bunny called as it approached KAITO’s form. “We’ve prepared your breakfast!”
“Oh? That took you long enough,” KAITO turned away from the mirror and smiled at the stuffed animals. “Is it the pancakes with ice cream drizzled in warm chocolate sauce that I’ve requested?”
“Yup!” another stuffed animal responded, and it started tugging at the hems of KAITO’s trousers. “Let’s go, let’s go!”
“Fufu, it can't be helped, I see that you cannot wait another moment to dine with a great king such as myself,” KAITO praised himself again, and took one last look at the mirror before following the stuffed animals back into the archway.
They soon disappeared from the scene, and the grand hall was blanketed in darkness.
“The king was served by his servants who he created from magic,” Miku’s voice picked up. “They would spend time everyday together. They had quite the strange relationship though - although their relationship was supposed to be that of a master and servant, the king was incredibly kind and father-like to his servants. He would always read them picture books and play with them in the garden.”
The scene then changed to that of a large garden. The garden was covered with many different flower beds, but unlike the flowers in the usual Sekai, these flowers had no faces and were not singing.
We found the king sitting on a carpet of grass in the garden, and he was putting together a flower wreath that looked to be near to completion as the stuffed animals watched him with anticipation. He raised the wreath to have a good look at it, and then carefully placed it over the head of the cat seated next to him with its legs folded underneath it.
“But, there were times when his people would interrupt his peace!” Miku said while exaggerating her anger. “The people didn’t like the king, because all he cared about was himself.”
Two figures approached the arched white gates of the castle outside the garden in the darkness. The spotlight then shone on them.
It was MEIKO and Luka. I looked back to the cloud that two of them should have been standing on, but they were no longer there. I hadn’t noticed that they had even left.
“Lowly King!” MEIKO shouted. “The monster attacks on the capital are only increasing! If this continues for any longer, more lives will be lost!”
The spotlight disappeared, and the light from the garden spread to the area surrounding the castle gates that was initially obscured by the darkness.
“...It’s you two again,” KAITO frowned as he stood up. He walked over to them with his arms crossed. “Unfortunately, I care not for the trivial affairs of the people.”
“You’re supposed to be the great king who protects his citizens! So why—!?” MEIKO grabbed ahold of the bar of the gates angrily. “Come down here and face us! Or else we will come to you and take both you and your ridiculous castle down!”
“I dare you to,” KAITO glared at them mockingly.
“...How awful,” Luka said, shaking her head in dismay. “It’s because of you that my daughter’s life was taken away… You will surely pay for your deeds, lowly king.”
Without answering them, KAITO turned on his heels and returned to the stuffed animals who watched the scene with worry.
I noticed KAITO had scrunched up his face, and it made me realize that the apathy that he had shown to the two was just an act . His selfish attitude was starting to seem like a front to hide his weakness—
“Unable to land a finger on the king, the two townspeople left back for the land using their hot air balloon,” Miku continued.
The gate was obscured by darkness again, and MEIKO and Luka's figures were nowhere to be seen.
“Great king, great king,” the raccoon stuffed animal said. “Monsters are scary. Why won’t you do anything about it?”
“It doesn’t involve us,” the king said with a smile as he snapped his fingers and materialized a cup of tea and its saucer in his hand. He closed his eyes and brought the ridges of the tea cup near his lips. “We can always live here in peace.”
“But the people just now looked very sad,” the same stuffed animal continued. “Isn’t the great king sad too?”
KAITO didn’t respond, however, and merely looked down at the liquid in his cup.
The scene was suddenly drowned out in darkness. The king reappeared under a spotlight, with the surroundings of the castle nowhere to be seen. He was standing directly in front of the castle gates, although there was no sign of the castle or the garden around.
Now that it was in our focus, we could see that there was actually a large white padlock that secured the castle gates together. But there was no gap for a key to go in—
“...I wish to help them,” the king said with a frown, and he curled his fingers around the bars of the gate and gripped them strongly. “I hate to see my people in such distress... But what am I capable of doing when I am unable to leave my own abode!?”
“—The truth was, that the selfish king could never leave the castle,” Miku said in a sad voice. “It was because of a curse left behind by the former king, who was taken down by an evil being.”
“Ashamed by the curse, the former king left the country below him, and moved his castle up to the skies.”
“...I have nothing I can do,” KAITO shook his head helplessly. “I am capable of magic, but I can’t even help a single person with it…”
“—I’m sure you can, great king!”
Suddenly, light filled the surroundings and we could clearly see that there was really nothing around KAITO. Len and Rin appeared from the heavens into the centre of the void, each flying on a broomstick of their own and looking down at the king with a bright smile.
“Hello, great king!” Rin greeted. “Let’s go down to see the capital city! It’s a beautiful place!”
“...Who are you?” KAITO asked in awe.
“We’re travelling magicians!” Len said enthusiastically. “We heard about a king who was suffering from captivity from our teacher, and we searched long and hard for a way to break you out!”
“Magicians…?” KAITO tilted his head in confusion.
“Yep!” Rin nodded. “Take your wand out, great king! All you need to do to leave is to have courage!”
“Courage, you say…” KAITO began to frown. “...Will I be able to save my people that way?”
“Yes, for sure!” Len nodded.
The king then reluctantly stretched out his hand to materialise his wand. The moment it appeared, it was enveloped in light and it suddenly morphed into a big key.
A keyhole magically appeared in the padlock. KAITO looked over at the padlock in awe, and swallowed his breath before cautiously inserting the key into the newly-appeared keyhole.
The padlock was unlocked with a ka-ching , and it cracked and shattered into pieces along with the key.
The white gate disintegrated along with the padlock and key, and the metal shards left behind by the objects evaporated into the void as if they were just an illusion. Beyond the gate was a piece of land, in which beyond that was the ever abundant sky, where beneath lay the view of the roofs of the houses and shops that lined the streets of the capital city. KAITO’s eyes widened and his mouth was gaping in awe.
The king who was too absorbed didn’t notice that he had accidentally stepped into the sky, where there was nothing to keep him standing afoot.
But instead of falling, KAITO landed on the shaft of a broomstick, and he found himself sitting behind Len.
Both Len and Rin then flew round the merry-go-round where we were spectating the show. All of us had been so taken aback by the show that we couldn't say a single word. All we could do was follow the three actors as they flew past us with eyes that were overflowing with feelings of astoundment.
Len laughed, “Haha! Were you that excited, great king?”
“I can’t help it…!” KAITO said as he wrapped his arms around Len. “This is my first time seeing the land…!”
“Hehe, you must be really happy, great king!” Rin smiled at the king from the side. “But we have to deal with the threat of the monsters first! Be prepared with your magic!”
“...You’re right.” the king nodded, and he removed one hand from Len’s abdomen and raised it to the air. Familiar blue particles gathered in between his fingers once again and from there a magic wand materialized.
The blue skies and the void disappeared into the darkness, and the ground was once again visible to our eyes. But the show tent and ferris wheel were nowhere to be seen. Instead, there was just the barren ground where many grotesque-looking stuffed animals were crawling about.
The king and the magicians landed on the ground on their brooms, and began taking down the monsters one after the other with their sparkly magic. Although we were high above the ground, we were still able to make out their forms well because of the distinctive hairstyles they had. The aerial view was not a perspective we were used to, but the new perspective personally made the fight a lot more exciting for me.
After some time of clashing with the monsters with their magic spells, the horde of monsters was finally cleared out.
The heads of MEIKO and Luka then came into view.
“...Do you think this is enough?” Luka asked. Her voice was loud enough for us to hear although she had been far away - it must have been a magic microphone or something. “How about the lives that were lost? My daughter?”
The king had no words to say in response. But Len placed a hand on his shoulder.
“—Let’s make it enough with our magic, great king,” Len said in a reassuring voice. “We may not be able to return the dead to life, but let’s at least return the smiles to the people.”
“Magician…” KAITO glanced at Len with a doubtful look. “...Am I truly capable of such a thing?”
“Of course you are!” Rin slung her arm around KAITO’s. “Just like before, all you need is courage, great king!”
The king then smiled down at the two magicians, “...Thank you, I will try my best.”
The king then took in a deep breath, and raised his wand like a conductor’s baton, similar to the gesture KAITO had made during the start of the show.
The ground below us was once again covered in darkness, and suddenly our eyes were greeted with the tiled flood of the Sekai. The streets were once again illuminated by the appearance of vivid lights. The everyday flowers had also returned to the Sekai, and they were singing the same melody that we always heard in the Sekai.
Len, Rin and even Miku were now flying their brooms around us while casting magic spells that created sparkles in the sky. MEIKO, Luka and all the stuffed animals in the Sekai, including the ones that served as monsters from before, were dancing with their partners to the tune of the flowers on the ground.
KAITO was back to where he was previously standing before he disappeared to become a part of the show. He was smiling with his eyes closed and he was moving his wand with one hand with the other hand outstretched. The combination of the colour of the lights on the ground were constantly changing following the tempo of his wand's movement, and the rhythm of dance also seemed to match up with the timing of the lights as they alternated.
Snowflakes then started falling to the scene from the heavens.
“S-Snow!?” Nene squeaked out. “Where did it come from…”
“Nene-chan, look!” Emu had caught one of the snowflakes in her hand, and was showing it to Nene. “The snowflakes are smiling!”
“...You’re right…” Nene muttered. “Cute…”
Rui on the other hand seemed to be in deep thought.
“What are you thinking about?” I asked.
“Fufu, I just didn’t think I’d get a chance to see this strange snow again,” Rui explained as he held his hand out. “It isn’t even cold, yet it really is snow…”
I gave him a wry smile, “Are you still equating this place to the real world…?”
Rui chuckled into his hand, “Fufu, I just think it'd be great if we could replicate this.”
I then turned back to the view on the ground. The snow that fell upon the ground where everyone was joyfully dancing and laughing down made my chest feel warm and tight.
The show had felt nostalgic, for some reason.
...Ah, now I remember.
The show was telling a story I really loved as a child.
But the ending was different. With that much hatred directed to the king, there couldn’t be a happy ending—
—This time though, it was a happy ending.
“...You have a nice smile on your face, Tsukasa-kun.” Rui commented as he looked at me with a smile. I turned my head to look at him - he had a gentle expression for some reason.
“...Yeah,” I nodded, and looked back at the view of the people. “It was an amazing show.”
“...We’ll make a show that’s even better.”
I didn’t answer, though. I was still watching the scenery with a smile. It made me so happy seeing an alternate ending to the story. I was happy that the king didn’t have to die tragically in the end.
Although I could feel Rui’s perplexed gaze on me awaiting a response, I was too enamoured by the scenery to think about it.
The dancing then stopped and the street lamps stopped cycling between the many illuminations. Everyone from the ground looked up at us and bowed.
Everything was filled with darkness again. The street lamps of the Sekai lit back up, and we were greeted by the view of the show tent and ferris wheel we were used to. KAITO then walked towards us across the sky.
The moment he arrived to the cloud in front of the merry-go-round, I knew I had to immediately praise the show, “That was a really amazi—!”
But I was interrupted before I could finish my sentence.
“KAITO onii-san!!! It was soooooo sparkly!” Emu spread her hands out excitedly. “This is my first time watching a show on a flying merry-go-round! And everything around me kept changing, it was so heart-throbbing! It was so wonderhoy—!!!"
My eyebrow was twitching from being rudely cut off, but I let it go pretty quickly.
“It’s not something that’s realistic, after all…” Nene reminded. “...We’re really lucky to be able to be here. Things that aren’t possible in reality are always happening, and it’s always exciting.”
“Fufu, I’m honoured for your praise,” KAITO placed his hand on his chest and bowed slightly. “...But that isn’t all we have for you today.”
“Oh? There’s more?” Rui tilted his head curiously.
“You’ve heard it again and again, haven’t you? The Sekai hasn’t even started yet!” KAITO exclaimed excitedly, and he walked over to us.
KAITO kneeled before me and offered me his hand, "Let's go, I still have a lot more to show all of you.”
I could feel an unsettling gaze on me again as I took KAITO’s hand and allowed him to help me off the horse.
Miku, Len and Rin shortly arrived on the merry-go-round while still on their broom, and they extended a hand for Emu, Rui and Nene respectively. As they took the hands that were offered to them, the three of them were lifted up in the air by what seemed to be magic and they landed securely on the broom.
KAITO then waved his wand to form a stairway made of scores that led down to the ground. He continued to hold my hand as he guided me down the stairs to make sure I didn’t trip. I could still feel someone’s intense gaze down my back, though...
While on the broom, Emu reached her hand out for one of the stars and tickled its head, “Hehe! I can touch them now! It’s amazing!”
“Fufufu, It is a place created from my feelings, after all!” I happily reminded her.
“Yeah, yeah,” Nene sighed. “I guess that does make sense.”
“Fufu, this is the first time you’ve acknowledged it, Tsukasa-kun,” Rui joined in.
“Tsukasa-kun is always saying, ‘I don’t understand’ all the time, after all~” Emu imitated me in her usual cheery voice.
“I mean, I still don’t understand this place…” I admitted. “But since KAITO said so, I’m sure it’s made from my feelings! I can see that this is truly a place created from the mind of a star!”
“That’s right,” KAITO smiled as he nodded at me. “Tsukasa-kun really is amazing.”
“Yup, yup! Tsukasa-kun is amazing!” Emu nodded along with KAITO.
“Haha!” I placed my free hand on my hips. “Praise me more!”
“Noisy…” Nene mumbled.
Rui chuckled again, “Fufu, it’s good to see everyone in high spirits, though.”
We eventually reached the entrance of the ferris wheel, where MEIKO and Luka awaited us with the stuffed animals once again.
“Oh, the ferris wheel!” Emu pointed at it. “...Come to think of it, we rode the ferris wheel with Nenerobo-chan before, didn’t we? I wish Nenerobo-chan could be here too…”
“It can’t be helped,” Rui said. “We were in a rush, after all.”
“...Yeah…” Nene muttered, and the mood fell gloomy once again.
Not now. They shouldn't think about it now.
“We’ll bring Nenerobo here next time,” I said, cutting in the silence. “For now, let’s enjoy the ride to our heart's content.”
“Mhm,” Emu nodded with a small smile.
We populated the cabin that was parked on the ground. MEIKO closed the door for us, and gave us a small wave before walking over to KAITO.
“...I hope you’ll all look forward to the next attraction, then,” KAITO said as the virtual singers gathered around him.
The ferris wheel began to move, and they all bowed in our direction.
Suddenly, I felt something squeeze my hand. It was Rui’s hand that was next to mine. Our hands were behind our backs so Emu and Nene didn't notice Rui was holding my hand.
“...Rui?” I asked in a whisper, worried that Rui had a problem that he didn’t want Emu and Nene to find out. “Are you okay?”
“Of course I am,” Rui whispered back. “...But is it fine if I hold your hand like this?”
I was confused, but I smiled and nodded, “If it helps you, then sure.”
When we were about to reach the top of the ferris wheel, Emu suddenly yelped, "Oh!"
Emu then pressed her face on the window and pointed at something in front of us, “Tsukasa-kun, look! That’s—!”
All of us turned in the direction Emu was pointing at. A luminescent fizz had pierced its way through the sky, and at the very top of the night sky, the concentrated luminescence exploded and disintegrated into bright glowing dust. It was the same stardust that the star in the train had emitted.
—It was a fireworks display made purely out of stars.
I hadn’t realized that the stars were nowhere to be found even after the show concluded. This must have been what they all went away to prepare for.
“Waaaaahhh!!!” Emu cried. “T-The stars became fireworks…! It’s so pretty…!!!”
Nene was speechless at first, but the words finally left her mouth and she was smiling wider than usual, “It really is…!”
“...I never thought I’d see such a sight,” Rui was similarly enchanted. It seemed that the disarray from earlier was gone from his face now. “This place truly is full of wonders.”
I only smiled, and I turned from watching their faces back to the sky.“...I can never comprehend it, to this day.”
I was really happy watching the cheerful look on everyone’s faces.
The ferris wheel eventually came to a stop at the very top. We were allowed to take in the view without any distractions now.
As we continued to enjoy the fireworks, Emu’s face started getting drowsy. It was no surprise, since she was in such high spirits just now. Nene’s eyes seemed to be dropping, too.
“We got to watch a show from the merry-go-round, fly on a broom and even watch fireworks made from sparkly stars...” Emu eventually leaned on Nene’s shoulder, “Hehe, it’s so fun here.”
“...Yeah,” Nene said, as she started nodding off.
It didn’t take long for them to fall asleep on each other.
“...And now they’re sound asleep,” I pointed out the obvious. “That was quick.”
“Fufu, they must have been tired from worrying so much,” Rui suggested.
“Yeah,” I closed my eyes and smiled. “I’m relieved that they both look a lot happier now.”
“...Though, I am worried about how they’ll head back,” Rui raised.
Before I could say a word, a flash of blue flew past us.
“Everyoneeeee~! ☆” The flash of blue then flew round back to our cabin and stabilized itself in front of us. It was Miku. “Oh, looks like Emu-chan and Nene-chan have fallen asleep! Hehe, was all the fun tiring for even Emu-chan to take in?"
“I’m sure that’s the case,” Rui said with a hand on his chin. “That was a magnificent display and show, Miku-kun.”
"Fufu, we’re happy that you enjoyed our show!” Miku said excitedly.
“Still, how will they go back now…” I asked worriedly.
“It’s okay, they’ll be right in their rooms once they leave! ☆” Miku reassured us.
“And yet aother magic that I can’t comprehend…” Rui smiled in amusement.“This place truly never fails to fascinate me. I have lots to learn.”
My shoulders fell, “I’ve given up already…”
“Hehe! The ferris wheel will start moving again soon, so I’ll see you down below~ ☆” Miku said, and she flew off before any of us could respond.
“...Her high tension sure reminds me of Emu,” I commented. But Rui didn’t respond.
Rui suddenly looked at me seriously.
“...Tsukasa-kun,” He squeezed my hand strongly. “Thank you for today.”
“I’ll head home and do more research into this.” Rui continued. “I think I should be able to think more clearly now.”
“...Alright,” I nodded. “Don’t push yourself, Rui.”
“...Do you want to stay over?” Rui asked. “You can’t go back to your place, can you?”
I shook my head, “...I’m fine.”
Rui wasn’t convinced. He seemed to have noticed my reluctance to leave. But he thankfully left it there.
“How about food?”
“I’m not hungry, so it’ll be fine.”
“...That’s no good.” Rui shook his head. “I’ll bring some of my mom’s cooking over tomorrow. You’ll probably be hungry then.”
“...Thanks,” I then looked over to the two girls in front of us. “Oh, and take Emu and Nene with you. They might catch a cold sleeping here.”
“Alright.”
But Rui remained where he was. I looked over at him curiously.
“Tsukasa-kun,” he uttered my name. “There’s something I wanted to tell you.”
“Hm? What is it?”
Rui was suddenly facing me. He then leaned over and brought his face closer to mine. I was prompted to twist my body to face him as I felt heat rising onto my face.
“...I think you can tell what I’m about to do, right?”
The first thing that came to mind was a kiss. But why?
“...Tsukasa-kun.” Rui said my name again. “Is it okay?”
I didn’t hate the idea of kissing him, but I just couldn’t understand. I squeezed my eyes close without responding.
I didn’t care what happened next. After this, he would be gone, after all.
But Rui didn’t do anything.
“...Could you tell me how you feel?”
“...Eh?”
I fluttered my eyes open to his face once again. His face was stern and serious - it was the same face he would make whenever an issue that needed his urgent attention arose during a show.
“...It’s… a kiss, isn’t it?”
“That’s right.”
“...Then, I don’t understand,” I frowned. “Why me of all people? And we’re both guys—”
"That kind of thing doesn’t matter to me,” Rui intertwined our fingers together.“You’re the only one who’s made me feel this way, Tsukasa-kun.”
I could feel my face getting redder. My chest felt warm for some reason.
“...I want to kiss you too, Rui.”
Rui smiled, and he closed the distance between us. It was embarrassing, but at least Emu and Nene were both sleeping.
“...I like you, Tsukasa-kun,” he said. “I promise I’ll find a way to fix things. Let’s make shows together again.”
He pressed our lips together, and he took in the other hand that I had left on my side.
Our lips lingered on each other for a while, and I was pressed against the tampered glass of the cabin. I should have been scared of falling, but I was filled with more happiness than anything to think about it.
I returned his confession after the kiss ended, “...I like you too, Rui."
The smile that formed on his face was kind and warm. It made my heart skip a beat.
He then pulled away from me, rose back to his feet and walked over to the other two girls.
Rui fished out his smartphone as he stood by Emu and Nene’s side.
"Oh, and be more careful about who you let touch you," Rui turned his head towards me with a strange smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Tsukasa-kun.”
With that, the three of them disappeared into the light emitted from Rui’s smartphone.
I shrugged off Rui's words I didn't understand, and the ferris wheel then began to move again. When I reached the bottom of the ride, Miku was there to open the door for me from outside.
“...I hope you enjoyed the last show we planned for everyone, Tsukasa-kun,” Miku said with a soft smile.
“...I did,” I nodded. “I hope you’ll show me even more fun shows from now on.”
“Of course!” Miku bounced her head. “Oh! Tsukasa-kun, do you want to do something fun right now? The stuffed animals found a fun storybook! We were wondering if Tsukasa-kun wanted to read it with us!”
“I’m not tired yet, so I guess I’ll join you.”
Goodbye, everyone.
____________________________________________________________________________
I opened my eyes to find that morning had arrived to the Sekai. The stuffed animals were sleeping soundly on my side, but Miku and the others were nowhere to be seen. I had a blanket over my body, although I don’t have any memory of ever taking a blanket from anywhere.
—It took me a while to notice I was also in the shadow of a person.
“...Tsukasa-kun.”
I lifted my head in the direction of the voice, and there I was greeted with Rui’s distressed expression. His eyes were clouded and lifeless. There were black bags under his eyes.
I thought they were all gone now, but he was still there. He must have not slept. People seemed to forget everytime the next day came, after all.
"Nene and Emu-kun have forgotten about you."
...What an unpleasant voice to wake up to.
“...That was all intentional, wasn’t it?”
He had found out. I wasn’t surprised - because, if he still remembered, he would have understood everything right away. That night was meant to be a magical moment that would never be spoken of again.
“I felt like something was off…” Rui curled both his hands into fists at his sides. “Now I’ve realized what it is… You aren’t the kind of person who can stay calm when something worries you.”
“...You weren’t worried about this at all, Tsukasa-kun.”
There was a broken smile on Rui’s face. But it quickly fell and tears started to puddle in his eyes.
“Damn it!” Rui shouted as he slammed one of his fists in the air. “If only I noticed it earlier—!!”
“...I’m sorry,” was all I could bring myself to say.
“...Can you at least tell me why this happened…?”
“...I still don’t understand why it all happened,” I answered truthfully. “But now that it’s happened, I just thought it’s better to accept the way things are than to keep fighting it.”
“...I’m sorry…” It was Rui’s turn to apologize. “If only I wasn’t so useless…”
“You’re not at fault at all, Rui,” I shook my head. “Miku was probably right, that it was because I strongly wanted it somewhere deep down. I don’t understand why… But if I didn’t have these feelings, you wouldn’t have to suffer this way.”
Rui was quiet.
“...This is what I mean…” Rui said in a strained voice. “You’re not worried about yourself at all. Why are you only ever worried about us?”
“What is there to be worried about?” I shrugged. “I won’t be able to become a star now, but it can’t be helped. I’ll just live with it.”
“...Aren’t you sad that you won’t be able to spend time with your friends…? Or even see Saki-kun again? Your family?”
I was still unfazed, “Of course it would be a bit lonely, but it’s nothing I can’t handle.”
“...How could you care so little about yourself…”
Rui started crying. I didn’t understand why.
“...Rui, I’ve said this before, but I don't think there's anything for you to be sad about,” I reminded him. “Once you fall asleep, you'll forget about everything. You won't even realize that I'm no longer there with you guys."
“I’m not crying because of that,” Rui dug his fingers into his chest. “...It’s painful. I can't believe it took me so long to realize just how little you really care about yourself.”
“Wha...?” I looked at him with disbelief. “Hey, I do care about myself! In fact, I’m pretty sure I take care of myself better than you do. At least I’m always getting enough sleep.”
“If that’s the case, then you should be scared!” Rui shouted again. “You should be crying! You should be saying that you don’t want to disappear! You shouldn’t be so nonchalant like this! It shouldn’t be this way, Tsukasa-kun!”
“...That's true, isn't it," I cast my gaze to my feet. "I wonder why I don't feel that way."
“...I’m sorry, Tsukasa-kun. I should have paid more attention.” Rui appeared to have calmed down, but the pain on his face didn’t disappear. "Without emotions like that, it's a given that you would want to disappear. There's nothing to anchor you to reality."
"...Is that so..." I muttered, although I didn't really understand what Rui meant. "...I'm sorry, if only I wasn't like this."
“...That’s enough already, Tsukasa-kun.”
Rui scooped me into his arms and embraced me.
“Stop apologizing, it's not your fault,” Rui said in a gentle voice.“I’ll stay with you. I’ll make you feel that way. I’ll give you those emotions."
But I only felt numb.
“...But why?” I asked, genuinely curious.“This isn’t related to shows. Plus, you have Takazaki now who’ll carry out your directions now. You don't need me around.”
“...It’s because I’ve always loved you,” Rui said without hesitation. “I want you to keep making shows with me, it can't be anyone else. I want to keep you happy forever.”
Suddenly, my heart began to flutter, the same way it did in the ferris wheel. Now I could fully confirm that the feelings I held for Rui were love. It’s something I’ve never experienced before, but this must be the heart-throbbing feeling someone experiences when they fall in love.
I didn't understand why I was in love with Rui though. But I decided not to give it a lot of thought.
…I was really happy to hear his words. Although I didn’t like the idea of him burdening himself for me, it made me happy that I mattered so much to a person.
But his words made me feel sad too. It was all because of me and my hidden feelings that Rui was in so much pain. I wanted to do something for him.
I just wanted him to fall back to sleep so that he wouldn't have to suffer anymore.
“...I love you too, Rui.”
I threw my arms around him, and allowed myself to fall onto the fluffy cloud-like bed behind me, pulling Rui down along with me.
Rui raised his body and looked down at my face in surprise. His eyes were covered in tears. It was such a miserable sight.
I held his cheeks endearingly, to wipe away the tears that built up around his eyes because of me.
The act seemed to comfort him, and his eyes started to droop. But he shook his head and forced his eyes open.
“...Tsukasa…” He squeezed my hand on his face as he frowned.
“You’re tired, right?” I said to him softly. “It’s fine. I’m happy right now.”
I held his blue streak of hair in between my fingers, and tucked them back behind his ear. He was stubborn about clinging to his consciousness, but the moment I caressed his temple, his eyes finally fluttered close. His larger frame fell onto me, and his head landed next to my head on the pillow made from clouds. I continued to run my fingers through his hair as I listened to his soft breathing next to my ear. I could feel his body rising up and down together alongside his breathing through my other hand on his back.
His sleeping face was facing my direction as his temple rested comfortably on the pillow. His sleeping face was almost like that of a baby’s. He looked pure and innocent.
I wanted to ask him why he hadn’t fallen asleep the night before, but now that he seemed to be at such peace, I didn’t care to know anymore.
I looked over to his smartphone that he had gripped in one hand. There was light coming from the screen, and ‘The World Hasn’t Even Started Yet’ was still playing. However, the melody was starting to turn into incomprehensible white noise and the title was starting to be replaced by gibberish symbols.
—Rui was about to forget about me.
I lifted his messy bangs as my other arm still remained wound around Rui's body, and planted a kiss on his forehead.
I’m sorry I couldn’t make you happy.
I then moved my finger to his smartphone and pressed the 'stop' button without an ounce of hesitation.
But as a bright light shone from the screen, I heard a whisper in my ears—
“...I won’t forget…”
With that, Rui was gone.
____________________________________________________________________________
I found out that after my family had forgotten about me, I had already become a ghost in a way. I couldn’t touch anything in the real world. I didn’t get hungry or thirsty. But my condition didn’t get any worse - I still looked as healthy as ever.
Life never got boring though. There was a new world and story to explore everyday in the ever-changing Sekai.
With all the free time I had, I made sure to watch all of Leo/need’s live shows. There were times when Saki was sick, but her friends were always there to take care of her even when she ended up hospitalized. It was a relief.
I made sure to watch Touya’s performances too. He was able to smile so freely now, and it filled me with warmth seeing him pursue what he had always wanted.
And there were also Wonderlands x Showtime shows that I could never miss. I was happy seeing everyone so full of life and enjoying themselves. Although there were times Takazaki and Rui would get into fights and Emu and Nene would be left behind to worry, everything would still be resolved in the end without fail.
I noticed that everyone did have moments when they would start thinking about something that was ‘missing’. But out of all of them, Rui was the only one who was the most obsessed with that ‘missing’ feeling.
The robot he modified for me was still there in the world. It should have disappeared, but it was still there. And Rui always kept it by his side at his workspace whenever he was working, even though there was clearly no space to keep the large robot in his messy garage.
I was sad that he was still clinging dearly to the robot that had no meaning anymore. He would always have a troubled face whenever he looked at it.
“...What are you?” he would ask each time he looked at the robot.
I wanted to respond to his question to quell his worries. So one day, I decided to try using my phone that I still had access to to control the robot. I was reluctant at first, because I was afraid of how Rui would react to the said robot suddenly moving.
My smartphone was really the only real life object I could still touch. My phone never ran out of battery and I still had access to the internet. But I was not able to send or receive any messages.
When I typed in the words, "hello", the robot’s voice didn't come out. It must have been because its voice bank was made from my voice that no longer existed.
But when I started fiddling with the control buttons, the robot did start moving. With the little control I had, I tugged on the back of Rui’s shirt. But immediately after that, the robot powered off.
The shocked look on Rui’s face was priceless, and he looked as if he had just seen a ghost. I felt strangely satisfied.
He quickly investigated the robot, and even began to charge it.
—Wait, shouldn’t you be more scared!? It could be a ghost!
“...If you’re there,” Rui’s voice was ice-cold however. “Please operate the robot again.”
As if fate was telling me I shouldn’t be cheating like this, nothing happened when I pressed the control keys again.
Rui smiled sadly.
“...I guess not.”
I’m sorry Rui.
I really don’t want you to be sad. I hope that someday you’ll be able to completely forget about me and move forward.
...For some reason, every time I’m around you, there always seems to be a loneliness in my chest. It must have been because I still wanted to be with you. But thanks to the fun shows Miku and everyone else puts up in Sekai, I didn’t have to think about it.
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The truth behind your feelings—
Haven’t you realized it by now? That you were already dead from long ago?
No one came to save you from the castle you have been locked up in from the very beginning, so you died.
The person that existed to this point was simply the shine left behind by the dead star.
Now that you’re satisfied, it’s about time to put the dead to rest.