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Bumblebee couldn't fall asleep. He was usually able to go to bed with relative ease and sleep through the night peacefully and undisturbed.
Tonight was not one of those nights.
He wanted nothing more than to lay down and get some very needed sleep, but once he closed his eyes, he couldn't relax enough to snooze. His mind was racing. He had been laying here for about an hour and he was no closer to dozing off.
This wasn't the first time he had trouble sleeping, but this time there was a reason to it, one that he was very aware of. He couldn't get his mind off of the events that occurred the past week. It still felt surreal, even now, but he wasn't able to stop his mind from wandering back to the memories of everything that had happened. With a sigh and the realization it didn't seem like he would be able to fall asleep otherwise, he very carefully and quietly got up. Bumblebee made sure to keep his steps light as he tiptoed to the door, slow and cautious in opening it. He closed it behind him once he was standing out in the hallway, but didn't close it all the way, leaving it just slightly open for himself.
He made his way to the kitchen next tiredly, opening one of the cupboards. Wrong choice. There were only plates in this one. He was not eating anything this late at night (what time even was it?), and he wasn't hungry anyway.
Bumblebee sighed, finding the glass that he was looking for in the second cupboard. He'd get some warm milk to help him fall asleep, but he wasn't going to bother figuring out how to work the stove right now. He settled for a glass of water. It was hard to see in the dark, but he managed to make his way over to the tap. Pouring himself a glass, he lifted it to his lips to take a sip. It was oddly refreshing and helped to clear his head, even if only slightly.
He paused drinking.
His mind drifted to the reason he couldn't fall asleep. The last few days had been weighing down on him. He liked to follow a certain routine, even if not exact or identical, and now he was breaking said routine.
Bumblebee enjoyed going to bars and clubs to have a drink and relax, to have a good time. It just so happened that the men who were usually there were simple-minded. He rarely paid for his drink. Why spend money on a beverage if he could get someone to pay for him? He had a specific type, and he was quite good at judging the personalities of people he saw. The drink they ordered and their posture were usually very telling of what they were like as a person. The fact was, he liked big guys. Guys over 6 foot tall, who were buff and seemed to tower over his much smaller build. He'd spent enough time at bars to tell which of those would be naive enough to pay for his drink with just a little persuasion and if he managed to seduce them, even better.
He was single and had lots of time. Bumblebee wasn't looking for a relationship, but he enjoyed sleeping around and one night stands with strangers who he didn't know personally and wouldn't be awkward about looking in the eyes after. That's why his team was out of the question. It felt weird to even think about any of them in that way, but he was young with needs and urges that he wanted satisfied. His libido was always high and masturbating often left him more frustrated than sated.
Most of his partners were lonely, drunk men, and in case any of them were to regret it the morning after, he wouldn't be there to find out. He made it a habit to leave after, or if he was too exhausted and whoever he decided to spend the night with ended up falling asleep he would wake up very early and get out of there before the confrontation could happen.
What confused him was that he had recently broken his routine, and it was bad. Not only had he completely forgotten the entire 'get out of there before he wakes up' part, but he had ended up willingly sleeping the entire night peacefully AND staying the morning after.
He'd approached him at the bar before he even noticed who he was, though given how many times he'd seen him up close when he was pressing him down against the ground, he should have recognized him. In his defense, he rarely turned his back to him, and he hadn't seen him in casual clothing before. By the time he saw his face, he was already seated right next to him.
Bumblebee had misjudged his character because if he knew it was Blitzwing, he wouldn't have even approached him. It was probably due to how quickly his entire demeanor changed. He'd rather go home than try and hit on the single person who probably hated him more than anyone else because he really didn't want to get punched and have his pretty, soft face ruined by bruises. To his surprise, he looked irritated at first but seemed to warm up quite quickly. He considered getting up and leaving with an excuse, but he ended up staying way longer than he should have.
That was not his brightest decision, because a few drinks later he ended up in Blitzwing's bed , getting absolutely wrecked. It sure looked like he was holding a grudge and taking out all of his anger on him with the pounding he was receiving, but it was the best thing he'd experienced, even if his poor hips suffered for it. He intended to get up and leave as he usually would, but he found quickly that he was too sore and exhausted to get up, and so he was forced to stay the night.
He didn't want to think about the other times, but the problem was that for some reason, Bumblebee ended up in Blitzwing's bed again. And again. Whenever he was craving someone to make him forget about everything for the night, he found himself meeting Blitzwing at the bar. He hated his guts for how many times he'd hurt him, but he was his type. He was tall, had a smoking hot body, he could be rough with him and didn't treat him like he was fragile and would break if he didn't go agonizingly slow and gentle, which was exactly what he needed. He tried not to be too picky since he was only ever spending a night with whoever he picked up at the bar, but Blitzwing ticked all the boxes. Not to mention his voice. While he'd made fun of him for it before during their scuffles, his accent was s exy .
Sometimes they didn't even make it back to his place until later. If he managed to rile him up enough, Blitzwing would simply pin him against the wall of the nearest alleyway where they wouldn't be right in the sight of anyone who passed by.
He hated it.
But...
It wasn't because of who he was. He'd hooked up with Blitzwing so many times he'd gotten to know him better than he ever wanted to. And it pained him to say this, but he wasn't that bad of a person.
This was why he couldn't get all these thoughts out of his mind. He was confused about his feelings because it wasn't supposed to go this far. He was convinced that if anyone found out about this, they'd be so disappointed in him. Thankfully his teammates were used to him going out late at night and never really questioned him or found it strange, though he'd gotten some worried questions when he'd spent the mornings over at Blitzwing's place.
The fact that he couldn't get him off his mind frustrated him. Even if he was good in bed, he was still his enemy.
But he found himself staying even after they were both satisfied in the morning more and more often. He couldn't believe that he actually enjoyed spending time with him. If this continued, he feared what the consequences would be if someone were to find out about their...arrangement. More than anything he was just very confused about his feelings and trying to explain to himself why he thought this was a good idea. Bumblebee told himself that he was just touch starved and needed some affection from someone. Though he didn't like the complications of being in a relationship, he was allowed to be lonely. Yeah.
It was a mutual desire for affection, and they both wanted it.
He finished his glass of water and decided to head back to bed now that he had at least somewhat cleared up his thoughts. As silently as he could, he made his way back to the bedroom, slowly opening the door and closing it behind him quietly. Bumblebee climbed back onto the bed, laying down comfortably, head resting against the pillow. He turned onto his side, this time facing the big man sleeping on the other side of the bed. Despite him getting up to get a drink, he was still sound asleep, which was a relief. Waking him up wasn't something that he wanted to do.
With a happy sigh, he buried his face into Blitzwing's chest, feeling comfortable and warm. None of that mattered right now. He would worry about this in the morning.