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It’s late when Tony is jolted awake. At first he doesn’t know why he’s awake, then he’s being shaken and it quickly dawns on him that his husband was responsible. Tony rolls over so that he’s facing Steve. He can barely make out Steve’s form in the dark.
“Tony?” Steve whispers and he’s reaching out to shake Tony again.
“Hmm?” Tony mumbles. His eyelids droop; he’s so tired.
“I think I’m having contractions.”
Tony’s eyes shoot open and he sits up quickly, turning his body to turn on the bedside lamp. The room illuminates in a dim glow, giving Tony a glimpse of the pained expression written on his husband’s face.
“Really? No false alarm?” Tony asks. He remembers the many trips they’ve made to the hospital because Steve was sure it was time to welcome their daughter, only to find out that it was just false contractions.
Steve winces and rubs at his protruding middle. “This doesn’t feel false.”
Those words are enough to get Tony out of bed and scrambling for his clothes. He rushes around the room in something presentable, settling for a comfy pair of sweats and an old faded band tee. Steve is still glued to his spot in bed and Tony pauses putting on his shoes to peer in his husband’s direction.
“Do you need help? I can get your shoes or pants or-”
Steve nods his head hurriedly, a pained moan leaving his lips when another contraction starts. Tony doesn’t even hesitate to locate Steve’s worn out sneakers, then he rushes to Steve’s side to help him put them on.
“Is this really it?” Tony asks as he carefully ties the shoelaces. Above him Steve gives a nod and a small smile.
“Yeah. I think it is.”
They return from the hospital a little after three A.M. with no baby. Steve is both frustrated and exhausted. He had been sure he was going into labor. For months he’s read every book he could get his hand on about pregnancy and first time parents. He knew about the false contractions and what to expect when they hit, and when he was awoken in the middle of the night with a sharp pain, he thought he was experiencing the real thing.
Tony yawns as they make their way back to their bedroom. He places the overnight bag near the door in case they need it again. He helps Steve out of his shoes, then assists with getting his husband comfortable.
“Sorry that it was a false alarm,” Steve says after they’ve gotten into bed.
Tony curls closer up to Steve, one hand finding Steve’s large belly. He rubs along the bump, smiling when he feels their daughter push against his palm.
“No need to apologize, sweetheart. She’ll get here when she’s ready,” Tony assures.
Steve huffs. “Yeah. I guess I’m just tired of being pregnant. I really want to meet her.”
Tony hums in agreement, his hand continuing to rub along Steve’s belly. “Me too. I know she’s going to be just like you.”
“Yeah? Is that a good thing? I kind of want her to be like you. Or maybe both of us. Just not too stubborn.”
Tony chuckles. “We might have a problem there. She’s already proving to be stubborn.”
Steve smiles and rests his hand over Tony’s. “Yeah. I guess she is.”
Tony is wary of leaving his husband alone. He’s reminded that the meeting was only a couple of hours, but during that time his daughter could decide she wanted out. Steve had assured Tony that there would be no baby any time soon. The contractions he had been feeling the day prior were non-existent and their daughter was back to kicking up a storm.
It still made Tony uneasy to leave Steve’s side, but Steve was stubborn and insisted he could survive without Tony for a few hours.
“Are you sure?” Tony asks again as he straightens his tie in the bathroom.
“Yeah,” Steve replies from their bedroom. He’s lying in bed with a book and a cup of his favorite tea. Tony hasn’t seen him this relaxed in a while. The past few weeks had been hectic with them preparing for their daughter’s arrival. It was nice to see Steve taking some time for himself. “She probably won’t be here until my due date,” Steve adds, a hint of irritation in his tone.
Tony winces and steps out of the bathroom. “That’s still two weeks. I know you probably feel like crap.”
Steve huffs out a laugh and changes the page of his book. “I do. I like being pregnant but this…I’m tired.”
Tony smiles sympathetically and comes over, leaning down to press a kiss to Steve’s head. “She’ll be here soon. It’s scary.”
Steve nods. “Yeah. But we can do this. Right?”
“Definitely.” Tony kisses Steve’s head again and then goes in for one on the lips, humming in delight from the feel of Steve’s lips on his own. “I’ll be back soon. If anything happens-”
“We’ll be fine,” Steve assures and brings Tony in for another quick kiss. “I’ll call you if you’re that worried.”
“Call me every fifteen minutes.”
“That’s a little much. If I feel a contraction I’ll call you, okay?”
“Okay. I love you.”
“I love you more.”
Tony smiles and kisses Steve’s belly. “I love you Maguna.”
Steve should have known his daughter would have had other plans. He was sure that she would decide to come closer to his due date, but he couldn’t have been more wrong. Morgan decided that she was ready to be born when her daddy was in an important meeting.
The first time he feels a contraction, Steve brushes it off as another false alarm. He continues on with small tasks around the house. His hospital bag was already packed and the nursery was set up for the baby’s arrival. All that was left to do was wait until Morgan decided to arrive.
By the third contraction, Steve is positive that what he was feeling was real labor. He can’t even finish the movie he’s put on because the pain is pretty close to unbearable.
He turns to lying down in bed, only for the tightening in his middle to disrupt any sleep he had been hoping to get. After a few more contractions, Steve decides going to the hospital was the best thing.
He calls his doctor first, and once he gets the green light to head over, he calls Tony. It takes a couple of tries before he’s finally reaching his husband.
“Is this it?” Tony asks on the other line, slightly out of breath. Steve can vividly picture Tony rushing out of his meeting and toward the elevators.
“Don’t hurt yourself,” Steve says sternly. The last thing he needed was his husband spraining an ankle or driving off the road in his haste to get home. “I’ll survive another thirty minutes.”
“I’ll make it there in ten!”
“Don’t you dare. Just get here but don’t speed. I need you in one piece.” Steve moves across the room to grab a couple more things for his bag, pausing his packing when another contraction begins to build. He releases a groan.
“Steve!” Tony’s frantic voice fills the speaker.
It takes a moment for Steve to straighten up and compose himself. He can still hear Tony’s panicked voice in his ear. “I’m fine,” he pants. “That one hurt.”
“I’ll be there soon okay! Don’t have her without me.”
Steve winces and grips his belly tightly.“Wasn’t counting on it.”
The pain is excruciating, possibly the worst he’s ever felt, but he keeps his discomfort to himself. Tony was already worried about him, and the last thing Steve wanted to do was give his husband something else to worry about. He could get through this. Grinning and bearing through the pain was something he was used to.
Steve shifts from his spot on the bed, the sudden movement catching his husband’s attention. Tony’s tired eyes are quickly perking up and he’s rushing toward Steve’s side, huffing in annoyance when Steve waves him away.
“I’m fine,” Steve assures, waving Tony away again when he tries to intervene. “I gotta move.”
At first Tony is hesitant to let Steve get up, but with a sigh of defeat, he steps back and lets Steve do what he wants. “If you need anything…” Tony doesn’t finish that thought, knowing that Steve won’t accept his help. It’s frustrating.
“I know.” Steve throws his legs over the side of the bed, grunting softly from the added weight in his middle. He couldn’t wait until he could see his feet again.
Tony is by his side in seconds, pulling Steve up and helping him steady. It’s at this moment another contraction hits, this one stronger than the one prior. Steve grips Tony’s shoulders and hunches forward, resting his head against Tony’s chest, painful groans slipping past his lips.
“You’re doing good,” Tony says softly, his hand rubbing soothing circles along Steve’s back. He drops his hand lower, pressing his fingers deep into the part that aches the most. Steve groans again, this time from the pressure Tony’s fingers are creating. “What else do you need, sweetheart?”
“For this to stop. It hurts. It really hurts.” Steve squeezes his eyes shut and wraps his fingers around Tony’s shirt, twisting the fabric.
“I know. But it’ll be worth it. We’ll have our baby girl.”
Steve nods, smiling as he pictures holding Morgan for the first time and meeting the little person he’s been growing for nine months. He wonders if she’ll look like Tony, if her personality would be laid back or stubborn and sassy. Tony had a tendency to sass and Steve was guilty of being bullheaded every now and then.
Whatever scenarios form in his head disappear the second his belly tightens again and another contraction builds. Steve cries out from the sharp pain, tears pricking the corners of his eyes. Tony keeps him steady, all the while encouraging and comforting him.
Steve gives up on walking around the room, the ache and his feet becoming uncomfortable. Tony helps him back toward the bed, only for Steve to refuse and gesture to the large tub across from the bed.
“My back hurts,” Steve explains, wincing when the muscles in both his back and belly contract. “The water might help.”
“Okay.” Tony nods and helps Steve get situated in the large tub. The second Steve is in the water, he relaxes and his eyes fall shut. “Better?” Tony asks, kneeling down and taking one of Steve’s hands. “What else do you need?”
“Nothing. I’m okay.” Steve opens his eyes and shoots Tony a small smile. “This helps. You being here helps a lot.”
“Honey, I’m not going anywhere. All I want is to make sure you and Morgan are okay.”
“I think you went a little overboard.” Steve chuckles as he glances around the extravagant birthing suite. He rests back against the tub and shuts his eyes again, focusing on the soothing warmth of the water. Any tranquility he finds doesn’t last for long, and his body tenses up with another contraction. He tilts his head over the edge of the tub and groans, one hand squeezing the porcelain and the other soft flesh.
“Breathe, Steve,” Tony coaches. “In and out.”
Steve inhales deeply, then exhales slowly. His face contorts in pain and another groan escapes him. He takes another deep breath, only to choke on the air when his belly spasms.
“Ah! Tony, it hurts!” Steve cries, unable to hold back the tears. He squeezes Tony’s hand a little harder than he means to, causing his husband to grunt in pain. “Sorry!” Steve is quick to apologize and he releases Tony’s hand. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize, darling. I probably deserved that, huh? It’s my fault you’re suffering.”
Steve chuckles softly and slants in the tub. He takes Tony’s hand again and rubs his thumb along Tony’s knuckles. “It’s worth it. We get to have a baby.”
“Yeah.” Tony smiles and brings Steve’s hand up to his lips so that he can kiss it. “I’m excited.”
“Are you scared?”
“Terrified.”
“Me too.”
“But we have each other and I know when I’m with you I can do anything. Even raise a stubborn, sassy little girl.”
Steve laughs. “Sounds like the both of us.”
“She’ll be perfect.” Tony leans in and kisses Steve softly on the lips. Their moment is interrupted when Steve gasps into Tony’s mouth and pulls away, groaning when his belly tightens.
“I need to get out,” Steve announces. “This isn’t helping anymore.”
Tony nods and helps Steve out of the tub. He helps dry him off and change back into the hospital gown. They walk around the room for a few minutes until the contractions get bad again. Steve has to pause beside the bed and wait out the contraction until he can move again.
“Tony, it hurts,” Steve whimpers, his fingers clutching into the bed sheets until his knuckles are turning white. “Make it stop. Please make it stop.”
“I wish I could, honey. Maybe I can invent something that’ll transfer all the pain to me.”
Despite the pain he’s in, Steve manages to laugh. Tony smiles at the sound. He’d take Steve laughing over screaming any day.
Eventually Steve is able to lie back down. The nurse comes in to check on him and the monitors he’s connected to. Morgan is still in the right position and not showing any signs of distress. They still had a ways to go before she would be born; Steve was only three centimeters.
“You’re almost there,” Tony says once they’re alone again. Steve doesn’t respond, too engrossed in the task of breathing through another contraction. He emits a groan and Tony leans forward in his chair to take Steve’s hand. “You’re doing so good, Steve. It’s amazing.”
“It doesn’t feel amazing,” Steve huffs and throws his head back against the pillow. He glances down at his belly and glares at the bump. “I want her out. I hate this.”
“I know. She’ll be here soon.”
Tony hates seeing Steve in pain. He’s witnessed Steve with a cold or a bad case of food poisoning. Steve had suffered then, but it didn’t compare to the indescribable pain he was going through now. He wishes he could take it away, but he’s left to watch helplessly as Steve battles contraction after contraction.
It’s getting difficult to hold back his cries of pain. Steve’s body tightens and he groans loudly into the pillow when a new contraction hits. Tony is sitting beside him, comforting him and rubbing his back. Steve appreciates what Tony is doing but it’s not enough. The pain was becoming unbearable.
“I can’t do this!” Steve screams. His fingers twist the pillowcase. He buries his face into the pillow and screams again, the sound muffled but still painful to Tony’s ears.
“I know. But you’re almost there, Steve. Morgan will be here soon.”
Steve sobs into the pillow, another scream following. Tony continues to comfort Steve anyway he knows how. The contraction tapers off and Steve relaxes, his eyes drooping from the exhaustion.
“Try and sleep okay?” Tony says as he rubs a hand along Steve’s back, hoping it coaxes his husband to sleep.
“Can’t,” Steve mumbles into his pillow. “Hurts.”
“It’ll be over soon. Do you need the doctor?”
Steve shakes his head. When he doesn’t say anything, Tony backs off and lets Steve rest. Lord knows he was going to need it.
When Steve wakes up it’s from another strong contraction. He screams from the intensity, his outburst startling Tony from his own nap. Tony is out of his chair in second and rushing to Steve’s side, offering his hand and comforting words.
“Tony, please!” Steve sobs, tears rushing down his face. “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t do it.”
“Yes, you can. Honey, you’re so strong. You can do this. I know you can,” Tony assures as he gently pushes back the sweaty strands of hair from Steve’s face. Steve groans loudly and squeezes his eyes shut, another scream building in his throat. “Breathe, Steve.”
Steve does as instructed, but after a few minutes of the breathing exercise, he grows impatient. “I can’t! This isn’t working!”
“Okay. Um…” Tony pauses, unsure of what he’s supposed to say. The past few hours he was starting to sound like a broken record, and if he was annoying himself then he knew he was annoying Steve.
Steve smiles softly at him and takes his hand again. “Tony, it’s okay. I’m sorry.”
“For what? You’re not doing anything, sweetheart.”
“I’m not making this easy. I’m not trying to be difficult.”
“Steve, you are not being difficult. You’re having a baby. If anything I’m the one not making this easy. I don’t know what to do or what to say.”
Steve smiles. “Just you being here is enough. I’m glad it’s you.”
“Me too.” Tony leans in to press a soft kiss against Steve’s lips.
Throughout the evening Steve is unable to rest. As much as he tries to get some sleep, it’s always interrupted by contractions. They’re getting stronger and closer together, robbing him of any break. He tries to breathe through it, but that stopped working a long time ago.
He doesn’t bother leaving the bed anymore. Tony had suggested he had the tub again or they take another walk around the room, but Steve declines, wanting to stay in bed until their daughter is born.
Steve moans into his pillow, eyes squeezed shut and fingers twisting the bed sheets. Tony is sitting near the edge of the bed, watching as Steve screams and cries into the pillow. It’s too much to take.
“Tony!” Steve cries out, his body seizing up. His belly felt as if a hot knife was slicing through his skin. He screams again, begging and crying for his husband to help.
“It’s okay. Almost there,” Tony says, hoping his words would have some truth. He can’t imagine Steve doing this any longer.
“Tony, Tony, Tony,” Steve chants his husband’s name when the next contraction hits. He opens his mouth again to ask for help, but all that comes out is another scream before his eyes roll to the back of his head and his body goes limp.
For a moment there’s peace. There’s no painful contractions or an aching back. The rest Steve had been waiting for finally comes.
Then it’s over.
He opens his eyes slowly, blinking back the fog that clouds him. He’s met with Tony’s worried face.
“Tony?”
“Oh my God, Steve! Are you okay?” Tony asks, cupping Steve’s face.
“What happened?”
“I think you passed out. One minute you were awake and then you just went limp.”
“Shit.”
“I’m gonna get the doctor okay? Maybe there’s something she can do.”
Steve nods, regretting the motion when a flare of pain shoots through his head. Tony leaves the room and returns a few minutes later with Doctor Cho behind him.
“How are you feeling?” Helen asks, coming over to check the monitors. “Your husband told me this has been pretty rough on you.”
“A little, yeah,” Steve says. “Is she okay?”
“The readings are still good. I’m going to check your dilation again, okay?”
Steve nods and lies back as he waits for the exam to start. Tony stands beside him, holding his hand and whispering sweet nothings.
“You’re halfway there,” Doctor Cho announces. Steve can’t help but sulk from the news.
“How much longer?” He asks.
“Every person labors differently so it’s hard to say. Were you considering an epidural?”
“Yeah. I think so.”
“Okay. I’ll have our anesthesiologist come by shortly. Just hang in there, okay? You’re doing good.”
Steve appreciates the nice words and warm smile, but deep down he wanted his doctor to say something else. She leaves the room, giving the new parents time to be alone.
“Well, you’re super close,” Tony says and sits down in the chair he’d been occupying for the past few hours.
“Not close enough.” Steve huffs in annoyance. Another contraction begins to build, provoking a pain filled groan from Steve’s lips. “Ah! Tony!”
Tony takes Steve’s hand again. “Breathe, honey. You need to breathe.”
Steve screams and his back arches off the bed. His body trembles from the intensity of the contraction. Then he goes limp again.
For the next two hours Tony is left to watch Steve suffer from the contractions. He hated the way Steve screamed and begged for relief. He hated the way Steve would lose the fight and let the pain completely take over.
Doctor Cho had assured them that they were well on their way now that Steve’s water had broken. Tony had expected their daughter to make her grand entrance any second now, but with every passing minute she was proving how stubborn she really was.
The anesthesiologist had yet to visit their room. Tony knew the hospital was busy and other people were having babies, but none of that mattered when all he wanted was relief for his husband.
Steve is currently battling through another contraction. Tony does his best to keep him alert when the pain becomes too much. He praises Steve for being strong and doing well. He encourages him to keep going and remember that the pain was worth it.
Then finally Steve is administered the epidural.
“It’s good to see you smiling again,” Tony says, his own face lighting up at the sight of the small smile on Steve’s face. It’s not his usual bright smile; it’s tired and a little forced, but it’s a smile nonetheless.
Steve huffs out a laugh. “I can’t feel a thing. I should have gotten this a long time ago.”
“You were supposed to.”
“I think I can sleep now.” Steve rests his head back and shuts his eyes. They don’t stay closed for long and he frowns.
“What?” Tony asks, growing concerned. He hoped the drugs hadn’t worn off already.
“I can’t feel my legs. They’re…it feels like they’re filled with sand.”
Tony chuckles. “Beggars can’t be choosers. How do you feel beside the sand filled legs?”
“Good. Excited.” Steve smiles down at his belly. “I’m excited to meet her.”
“Me too. She sure loves to take her time,” Tony says, as he yawns. He slants I’m his chair, eyelids growing heavy. “We’ve been here all day.”
Steve hums in agreement. “We’re almost there.”
Tony nods and shuts his eyes. “I hope so.”
“Let’s check how you’re progressing.” Doctor Cho smiles and puts on a clean pair of gloves. “How are you feeling?”
Steve grunts as he tries to get comfortable. He’s exhausted and cranky from lying in a hospital bed all day. He had tried to sleep once he got the epidural, but he ended up being too nauseous to sleep.
“I want her out.”
Helen chuckles. “She’ll be here soon.”
Steve grumbles and throws his head back in frustration. Tony is awake now, still in his chair and holding Steve’s hand.
“Okay. She’s well on her way. Two more centimeters,” Doctor Cho announces. “I’ll be back to check on you in a little while. Hopefully when I return it’s time to deliver this baby.”
Steve nods. “Thank you.”
Doctor Cho smiles. “Any time,” she says, then she leaves the room.
“She’s almost here. Thank God,” Tony says as he rises to his feet, groaning softly when he stretches and his back pops.
“I know.” Steve nods and rubs at his belly. Pretty soon Morgan would be in his arms. “I’m excited. And I'm a little nervous.”
“Me too since we're being honest. I can’t wait to tell her how long this took.”
Steve chuckles. His smile falters quickly when a pressure forms deep in his pelvis.
“Steve?” Tony is quick to notice the change in Steve’s demeanor. “Honey, what’s wrong?”
“There’s a lot of pressure.”
“Okay…what does that mean?”
“Get Helen.”
Tony doesn’t even hesitate before he’s rushing out of the room in search of the doctor.
The time had come for them to meet their daughter. After twelve, long, painful hours, they were finally going to welcome Morgan into the world.
Steve has been pushing for over thirty minutes and has nothing to show for it. He’s covered in sweat and tears are burning his eyes, but he doesn’t stop pushing. He brings his chin down to chest and bears down, grunting from the strain. Beside him Tony is holding his hand and encouraging him to keep going. The nurses and Helen have joined in, offering their own versions of encouragement.
Steve eases off when the contraction ends and he slumps back against the bed, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he tries to catch his breath. Tony leans in to press a kiss to his sweaty temple.
“You’re doing so good, honey. She’s almost here.”
Steve smiles weakly from the praise. His face twists in pain when the next contraction comes. He can’t hold back his scream this time when the pain worsens. Tony is there again, whispering words of encouragement in his ear.
Between his legs Doctor Cho is instructing him to keep pushing. Steve wants to hold off and take a moment to rest, but his body has other ideas and he has no choice but to listen to the instinctual urge to push. He takes a deep breath and blows it out, then he’s pushing again.
A fiery pain erupts between his legs. It doesn’t even compare to the contractions he had been feeling all day. He can feel himself opening up to accommodate Morgan’s emerging head, the sensitive skin burning from the stretching.
Steve lets out a scream when Doctor Cho assists by inserting her two of her fingers and moving them from side to side. He squeezes his eyes shut and grips Tony’s hand, desperately hoping for the pain to end.
“Her head is almost out. One more push,” Helen says.
Steve groans and bears down again, focusing on his breathing and bringing his daughter into the world. Tony has one arm hooked under Steve’s knee to keep him open, and when he glances between Steve’s spread legs, he gasps at the sight of his daughter’s head.
“Honey, I see her. She’s almost here.”
Those words bring forth a new determination in Steve. All he wants is to rid himself from the excruciating pain and meet his baby girl.
Steve gives a strong push, his efforts paying off when Morgan’s head slips free. Steve is able to catch a break and he rests his head back, panting heavily from the extortion.
On the next contraction he inhales deeply and pushes, his face turning red and more sweat gathering on his brow. Steve screams again from the burn between his legs. He tries to focus on the task of bringing Morgan into the world, but the pain is at its worst.
“I can’t!” Steve cries and throws his head back against the pillows. “I can’t do this. It hurts.”
“I know it hurts but you’re almost there. Just a few more okay?” Helen says.
Steve sobs and turns toward Tony, wishing his husband could rid him from the pain.
“You’re doing so good. She’s coming, Steve. You can do it,” Tony assures with a smile.
Steve smiles back before mustering up the strength to keep going. He pushes three more times before Morgan is sliding from his body and into the doctor’s awaiting arms. She wails loudly the second she takes her first breath, her face scrunched up in displeasure for her new home.
Tears stream down Steve’s face when she’s placed on his chest. She continues to voice her complaints, but the second he speaks to her, she’s quieting down and opening her eyes for the first time.
“Hi, baby girl,” Steve coos, his heart fluttering when she takes his finger and squeezes it.
She was perfect.
Morgan is comfortable in the soft blanket and natural warmth Steve produces. At just an hour old she already had her parents wrapped around her little finger.
Steve smiles down at her sleeping form and presses a kiss to her head, not caring if she was still wet and sticky from birth. She had fussed during her first bath, making it impossible for the nurses to scrub her sparkling clean. Steve didn’t mind. She was absolutely beautiful.
Tony is still beside him, eyes transfixed on their daughter. He’s already commented on her dark hair, still surprised that she didn’t come out blonde. He was sure she was going to take after Steve the most. She inherited his stubbornness.
“I can’t believe she’s here.” Steve smiles and he glances up at Tony. “Isn’t she beautiful?”
“She’s so perfect. She might have a tardy problem for the rest of her life though,” Tony jokes.
Steve chuckles. “It was worth it.”
“Yeah, it was. But if we do this again I hope it’s easier on you next time. I don’t think I can handle seeing you like that again.”
“Even if it was like this, I wouldn’t care. It’s worth all the pain. To be honest I forgot about most of it. All I can think about is her.”
Tony nods and gently runs a finger along Morgan’s hand. He smiles when she takes it and wraps her much smaller fingers around him.
It was a long and difficult journey to bring their daughter into the world, but in the end she had been worth it.