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1
When Xiao Zhan is six, his parents tell him that, unlike Lulu who is older than him and has to assume the throne one day, he is free to decide what to do with his life. He can become a warrior or a scholar or even an artist - the possibilities in front of him are endless.
“So I can just fly kites and play with cats all day when I grow up?”
“Uh… If you still want to by then, I suppose you can.”
There’s only one catch, they tell him. They have a very serious favour to ask of him. Later, Xiao Zhan will find out about military strength and trade deals, the politics of it all, but at six years old he just doesn’t want to disappoint his parents, so, assured that having a husband won’t get in the way of his stellar kites and cats life plan, he vows to make his family and kingdom proud.
That’s how he meets Wang Yibo for the first time.
Some memories of this day will stay with Xiao Zhan even years later: a banner with a splendid white peony, deep green clothes of the Luoyang delegation, a field of yellow flowers chosen to officially sign the treaty in, and a two-year-old child clinging to the queen’s hand amidst all those colours.
Mostly though, Xiao Zhan will remember looking at the child and wondering how he can marry someone who looks less like a prince and more like a plump little piggy.
2
It’s decided that every two years they would spend a few months together to ease everyone into this whole arranged marriage thing. Once Wang Yibo reaches a very mature and respectable age of nine, their second meeting in set.
Xiao Zhan has never been outside of Chongqing, so he is very excited about the trip. The journey is long and Na Ying, the royal adviser sent with him, takes the opportunity to tell him more about Luoyang. Xiao Zhan, curious and slightly nervous, gapes when he hears about the kingdom’s five princes.
“Why are there so many? Are they going to fight for the throne?” Xiao Zhan enjoys his studies, history included, so he knows how bloody sibling rivalry can get. The prospect of getting in the middle of that is terrifying.
Na Ying smiles, “It’s too early to tell, the oldest of them is only fourteen. But from what I hear, all five of them are close, and prince Yixuan is all set to inherit the throne. Be sure to remember it when you speak to him.”
Xiao Zhan has no intention of forgetting. Sure, this trip is an adventure for him, but mostly it’s a diplomatic mission of utmost importance. At thirteen, he’s ready to shoulder this responsibility. He knows he has to be on his best behaviour. More than that, knows he can do it. Na-jie says he is exceptionally good at being a prince.
It’s with these thoughts that he steps into the royal hall of the Luoyang kingdom and executes the most perfect and respectful of bows. He knows he’s done well when Na-jie gives him a barely-there nod and takes over the greetings.
Xiao Zhan takes care not to avoid eye contact with the king and queen, but neither does he want to appear overly-familiar or rude, so after a few glances he shifts his gaze to the right and looks at three boys. The oldest-looking must be the crown prince, Yixuan, who is currently frowning at two other children by his side. Xiao Zhan doesn’t know which princes they are, but both of them are staring at him with curious eyes. He smiles and inwardly cackles as their eyes widen. They are hilarious, but seem too old to be… Well. He’s not exactly searching for anyone in particular, but he does have a right to be curious himself, right?
So he turns his head a bit to the left, where the other two boys are standing. They are both small, about the same height, but Xiao Zhan doesn’t have to study them too hard to guess which one is Prince Yibo.
Huh, his cheeks really are that round, Xiao Zhan thinks with amusement, I did not imagine this part.
The rest of him is absolutely tiny though. He’s dressed in a very rich cloth of deep green with the signature white peony, but his hanfu cannot hide the fact that he is basically a twig of a human. It looks a bit comical in the face of his, well, face. Xiao Zhan squashes down a laugh that threatens to get out. Wasn’t he extremely confident in his ability not to offend anyone in this kingdom just an hour ago? His sense of propriety is usually much better than this.
Xiao Zhan gets a hold of himself and suddenly feels at a loss. What is he even supposed to do with this child? None of his close friends are that much younger than him. Okay, Ziyi is a little younger, but she’s different, okay. Ayunga and Yunlong is older, Yu Bin, Wang Talu and HuanHuan are his peers. Lulu, his main confidante and accomplice, has a whole year on him.
(For which he is so, so grateful. He would not want to trade places with her and inherit the throne one day. He is very content with being just a prince for the rest of his life, even if his goals have extended a bit beyond the kites-and-cats plan. Yeah, he still remembers that conversation with his parents. Unfortunately, so do they).
All this is to say, Xiao Zhan is unprepared for just how small Wang Yibo is, and feels really unsure about the next two months he has to spend getting along with a child. What would they even talk about? Xiao Zhan is basically a grown-up, getting his education, learning how the world works, finding out all the ways to benefit his kingdom, while the little prince is probably still interested in childish toys and games.
Xiao Zhan finishes his study of Wang Yibo and finds that the boy is looking at him too, his gaze serious and surprisingly focused. Their eyes meet for a beat. One, two, three. Then the prince lowers his eyes.
He’s shy, Xiao Zhan thinks, weirdly disappointed.
That’s when he becomes aware of someone else looking at him. ‘Looking’ might be the wrong word here. The boy next to Prince Yibo is positively scathing Xiao Zhan with his glare while leaning into his brother. Xiao Zhan sees him lean into the boy too. Huh. It occurs to him for the first time that he himself might be an intimidating presence for his betrothed.
(And what a weird thing to call a child. No one that small, with a face that round, should ever be called a ‘betrothed’. Nevermind that Xiao Zhan doesn’t feel like anyone’s betrothed either).
Things move on from there, he gets introduced to the princes and they all bow to each other. The glaring one, Prince Seungyoun, is a little less polite about it than he is supposed to be. Okay, Xiao Zhan gets it. If some foreign prince intended to marry Lulu and came to Chongqing, Xiao Zhan would probably hate his guts on principle too. But really, is all the murder-staring necessary? He hasn’t even done anything.
He does try. To do something, that is. During the welcoming banquet he gets seated right next to the little prince and attempts to strike up a conversation about local food. He is acutely aware of just how many eyes are on them, even more so when Prince Yibo gives him only yes and no answers and refuses to engage any further. Xiao Zhan gets a bit desperate and a lot nervous and throws a mildly panicked look at Na-jie. She only nods at him, an encouragement to continue.
“So. So which dish is your favourite?” he tries again.
At this, Prince Yibo looks up with a spark of excitement, “I really like hui mian, especially when the cook adds extra coriander and garlic, they are my favourite.” He’s finally facing Xiao Zhan directly, evidently having forgotten about his shyness in the face of talking about his food preferences. “You should really try it while you’re here!” His eyes widen, as if he said something rude, then swiftly shift to his parents, then other guests, until his head lowers again and he mumbles, “I mean… Only if you’d like to. Your highness.”
And here comes Prince Seungyoun with the glare again. Wonderful.
It goes on like that for a while until Prince Yixuan takes pity on them both and asks Xiao Zhan about his journey to Luoyang. He is surprisingly easy to talk to, and Xiao Zhan finds himself sharing things about his life at home. Somewhere in the middle of that princes Sungjoo and Wenhan join the conversation and start asking him about Chongqing. It makes things less awkward and Xiao Zhan is glad that there’s someone here closer to his own age.
So he’s not too upset by the time he gets to relax in the rooms provided for him. Na-jie takes some time to discuss the reception and he sees the subtle curve of her eyes that means she’s pleased with him. Her silent praise makes him proud and determined to not let her down.
Xiao Zhan is too excited by today’s events to go to bed just then, so he opens the sliding doors to his rooms and takes in the view.
He can’t see much beyond the inner courtyard, but the very air feels different from home. Chongqing is a mountain kingdom and it shows in everything from ups and downs in the terrain to the quality of air. Luoyang is full of low hills and wide open spaces, and it feels less sharp, in a way. The stars seem a bit different too, even if logically Xiao Zhan knows he’s not far enough away from home for that to be true. The moon is exactly the same though, and he stands there for a while, breathing in the mellow air and looking up at the night sky. It’s nice.
Until suddenly a small figure materialises in front of him out of nowhere. Startled, Xiao Zhan takes a step back and sees a glare he’s very well acquainted with by now.
“Prince Seungyoun?”
“What are you doing here?”
What kind of question… Xiao Zhan stuffs down a flash of frustration. “Just getting some air, your highness.”
“No!” The boy sounds agitated. “What are you doing here? What do you want from my brother? Are you going to take him back to your stupid Chongqing?”
“What? No, that’s—”
“He doesn’t want to go with you! He’s my twin!” Wait, what? Twin? “Get your own, you can’t have mine! I won’t let you take him away from home, he loves it here, what would he even do there?”
Xiao Zhan was ready to lose his composure at Chongqing being called stupid, but now the prince seems a bit desperate, possibly somewhere in the vicinity of angry tears, and Xiao Zhan decides against it. He reaches out and puts a hand on Seungyoun’s shoulder, trying to be careful as one would be with a spooked animal.
“Listen. I swear I’m not here to take any—” He doesn’t get to finish, again, because at that moment the boy bites his exposed wrist. Like, actually, literally bites it.
“Don’t touch me!”
Xiao Zhan doesn’t have time to react because suddenly two more people come running. One of them is the crown prince, who takes one look at the scene and goes to grab his younger brother.
“Seungyoun, we’ve been looking all over for you, what the f—”
A coughing sound from the second person interrupts him. Xiao Zhan, with some surprise, recognises Wang Han, the head of the royal council. He was there earlier to greet their delegation and then spent the whole banquet in conversation with Na-jie and the king and queen.
“Yixuan, please take Seungyoun to his chambers.” The crown prince nods, and forcefully turns the now truly crying boy in the direction he came from earlier. Wang Han then bows to Xiao Zhan, “Your highness, please allow me to accompany you into the rooms and make sure your wrist is alright.”
Xiao Zhan steps back to allow the man to come in. “There is no need though, it’s fine.” He checks to see if this is true. There’s a bright red imprint of teeth but the skin is unbroken. “Will… Will Prince Seungyoun be okay?”
Wang Han smiles, “It is very kind of you to ask. The prince will be fine.” He gestures to the low table in the room. “May I?”
Xiao Zhan hurries to agree and sit down with him. As a member of a royal family he is used to being addressed in a polite and venerated manner, but the man in front of him exudes an aura of such calm maturity and well-intentioned wisdom that Xiao Zhan feels like a kid who is unfit to allow or disallow him anything.
“I would ask you to excuse the prince, if you could. You see, he and Yibo are very close.”
“Yes, he mentioned something about twins?”
Wang Han laughs, “Yes, that’s what we call them, the Leo Twins. They share the same birthday, August 5th, only a year apart. As the older one between them, Seungyoun is very protective sometimes.” Yeah, no kidding. Who just walks around and bites people? “I formally apologise on behalf of the royal family for him going beyond all bounds of propriety today. It’s been an intense day for quite a few people.”
“If I made Prince Yibo uncomfortable during the banquet, I should be the one apologising.”
“Your highness, it is my job to know these things, so please believe me when I say you’ve done everything that’s been expected of you and more. There were many eyes on you two tonight, Yibo got a bit shy, that’s all. A lot of pressure has been put on him, and he’s only nine. I’m sure you of all people can understand this. In fact, I suspect it’s even harder for you, since you’re the older one and probably feel like you have to be more responsible?”
He phrases it like a question but Xiao Zhan feels seen through, as if the man can make out all his insecurities and fears with just one glance. Still, it doesn’t mean Xiao Zhan should voice his doubts.
“I assure you, I am fine,” he raises his chin stubbornly. He gave a promise to his parents, and to that he will stay true no matter what.
When Hang Han smiles, it’s warm and genuine. “That’s wonderful to hear. A piece of advice, if you would allow me.”
“Please. I would welcome it.”
“Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. You are both very young, you have time. There’s no set date for the wedding. Maybe there won’t even be any date at all.”
“You mean… You mean we can say no?”
“The king and queen love their sons very much. I am certain it is much the same in your case. The advantages of this marriage are known to all, but if it doesn’t work out between you and Yibo, if you grow to absolutely despise each other, I would guess the engagement would not move forward. And my guesses are almost always correct.”
The man says it with a half-smile, but Xiao Zhan is too preoccupied with this revelation to properly appreciate the attempt at levity. So this thing is not set in stone, not yet. He doesn’t know how to feel about it. Does it really change anything? His kingdom needs this marriage, so it has to happen, of that Xiao Zhan is sure. It is nice, however, to know there’s an out.
Wang Han gives him time to process all this and then continues: “So don’t force yourself. Maybe don’t think too much about the marriage part of it all. It would be enough for now to just try getting alone. At least,” he gives with a small bow, “such is my opinion. I would never presume to tell your highness what to do.”
Xiao Zhan stands up to all his not-quite-impressive height and gives a bow of his own, deep and sincere. Wang Han spoke to him with respect and honesty, did not treat him like a mindless child. Everything he said made sense, and now Xiao Zhan is eager to think it through more fully. Lulu’s always said he’s the over-thinker in their family, and that is true, he supposes.
“Wang-laoshi, I am grateful for your advice. I promise to consider it very carefully.”
“This is the most I could hope for.” Wang Han stands up and heads for the door. Just before exiting he turns around. “I’ve known all five princes since their birth. They are good boys. Quite unique. They will surprise you if you give them a chance.”
With that, he gives one last bow and leaves.
***
Next morning, a very persistent knocking wakes Xiao Zhan up. He hurries to get up and throw some more layers on before all but running to open the door.
What if something happened? What if it’s Na-jie with bad news from home? Are his parents okay? Is Lulu okay? If things went wrong while he is so far away—
“Your highness?..”
Indeed, it is Prince Yibo. He lowers the fist which was about to pound on the door some more. Unlike Xiao Zhan, he is perfectly put-together, with neat hair and another set of green hanfu on. His face is serious, the corners of his mouth downcast, and although there’s no need to continue knocking, his hands are still clenched into tight fists. All in all, he looks inordinately determined for a nine year old.
Not a trace of yesterday’s shyness, Xiao Zhan can’t help but notice.
“May I come in?”
“I mean, sure, yes,” Xiao Zhan, still half asleep and half in panic mode, moves aside. “If you could just wait for a few minutes, I’ll make myself presentable…”
“Punish me,” the little prince says.
There’s an awkward silence. Xiao Zhan tries to make his brain work, but it’s silent in there too. He searches Wang Yibo’s face for clues but is met with a steely gaze and furrowed eyebrows instead.
Along with incredibly round cheeks it makes the boy look pretty adorable, but doesn’t clear anything up.
“I’m sorry, what?”
“Punish me. What Seungyoun did yesterday, he did because of me. I asked him to. So I’m the one who should be punished for this offence.”
Ah. Now this visit is starting to make sense.
“You told him to come and yell at me?”
“Yes.”
“You told him to bite me?”
“Yes”
“And to spit in my face?”
“Yes.”
“And to threaten to kill me and my entire kingdom?”
“Yes.”
Xiao Zhan gapes. It’s not even funny anymore, he is honestly impressed. The boy didn't so much
as blink this entire time.
“Okay,” he says just to buy himself some time while he thinks of the best way to deal with this ridiculous, stubborn child. “Okay. Look, I’m not going to complain to anyone, no one has to be punished, I swear.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
The prince’s shoulders sag in relief.
Xiao Zhan, just because his mischievous side has been tickled, can’t help but add, “So you can stop pretending you were behind this.”
“I wasn’t pretending!” The boy instantly lifts his chin in defiance. Xiao Zhan raises an eyebrow. “I wasn’t!”
He stays silent. Really, this is so much more entertaining than he thought it would be.
“Did… Did he really spit in your face?”
At that, Xiao Zhan can’t hold his laughter any longer. He only stops giggling when the prince’s ears get red. It wouldn’t do to embarrass him too much.
“No, of course he didn’t. He just said some things and, honestly, I don’t blame him. He was looking out for you. I have a sister too, I would do no less for her,” he says as sincerely as he can, trying to put the boy at ease.
“Thank you,” the determined look is back on the little prince’s face. He struggles for a bit, but then continues, “I guess as your… y-your fiancé I should still apologise for the inconvenience.” At the word fiancé his ears get even redder and he lowers his eyes.
Xiao Zhan, remembering Wang Han’s words, decides now’s as good a time as any to set things right. It’s only fair that, as the older one, he should try making this whole mess work. He half-kneels to get on the same eye level with the prince and gently smiles. “It’s awkward, isn’t it? This marriage thing?”
The boy nods and only looks up at Xiao Zhan’s next words.
“It’s awkward for me too. How about we forget about it for now? I can just be here as a guest. I’d like to know more about your kingdom and its customs. I hope you can help me with that. Your brothers seem… lively,” Wang Yibo’s lips twitch, “maybe they could also show me around some time. We don’t have to do anything we don’t want to, right?”
Xiao Zhan tries to sound confident and not like he’s just as lost as the little prince. It’s not easy, because he himself is pretty shy too. On top of that, he’s the one in an unfamiliar kingdom, already homesick, with only Na-jie as his confidant. There’s no Lulu to reassure him, no Chuyue to tease. He’s more alone than he’s ever been, and there’s this important mission hanging over his head. It’s scary.
But as the boy in front of him slowly unfurls, Xiao Zhan can’t help thinking that maybe, just maybe, he’s done something good today.
“Right! Then it would be my honour to welcome you as a guest, your highness!”
Xiao Zhan grimaces, “Maybe you could also drop all these ‘your highnesses’? Just Xiao Zhan is fine, since I’m only a guest here and all.”
“Alright,” the prince squints, and then continues, “but only if you do the same. My name is Wang Yibo,” he adds, as if it’s a brand new information.
“Okay, Wang Yibo.”
They look at each other for a moment, until the little prince gestures towards the door and says, “I should go, they’ll be looking for me.”
He crosses the room, opens the door and turns back one last time. He doesn’t say anything, only nods, and then he’s gone.
Well. That was a morning. Xiao Zhan mentally compiles everything he now knows about Wang Yibo. A little shy. A lot stubborn. Most of all, ridiculously loyal, at least to his brother. All in all, not bad. Xiao Zhan just hopes the rest of his stay in Luoyang will have fewer spontaneous late-night and early-morning visits from the royal family.
***
His wishes do come true. Nothing too dramatic happens in the next two months. He slowly learns about the life in Luoyang, which is both like and unlike that of Chongqing. It takes a while to get used to the food: people here really love their vinegar, and sour dishes in general. Xiao Zhan silently longs for the spiciness of his home cuisine until one day he finally asks Na-jie if she misses it. She says she travels so much her palate is used to very diverse tastes. She does offer to procure some spices for him, but he doesn’t want to be a nuisance so he promises it’s fine. And it is, just a bit different.
The weather here is milder too. It’s the end of June and the temperatures already get kind of high some days, but there’s no heat that’s sometimes so hard for Xiao Zhan to endure back home.
He attends lessons with other princes and finds that he enjoys learning the history of this unfamiliar kingdom as much as his own. The more time he spends with the crown prince, the more he appreciates his company. Yixuan is responsible about his studies and takes the role of the heir to the throne very seriously. He is kind and generous, if a bit straightforward. Xiao Zhan is weirdly fond of that too, actually, since it reminds him of Chuyue back home.
Sungjoo is easy to get along with too. They find a shared interest in music and spend quite a few hours learning about famous pieces of each other’s kingdoms. One day, while they are in the music room, they are interrupted by a very loud man who speaks extremely fast while commenting on a melody they are trying to learn. He grabs an arhu and does something different, which makes the melody sound divine. He asks Xiao Zhan and Sungjoo to hum along with him and the three of them spend a very pleasant half an hour. That’s how Xiao Zhan meets Da Zhangwei, who turns out to be a member of the royal counsel.
“Really?” he asks Sungjoo later. “He seems… too lively to be in the council?”
“That’s just how Da-laoshi is,” Sungjoo laughs. “He is insanely talented and the people of Luoyang love him. He’s actually the one responsible for our festivals.”
Xiao Zhan has just barely missed the famous peony festival held in Luoyang in the middle of spring, and he’s actually disappointed about that, since its fame is spread all the way to Chongqing and far beyond. He decides to make sure one of his visits happens in March or April in the future. Still, it’s interesting and unexpected to meet a person responsible for this festival.
Wenhan is a… special one. Initially he’s a bit wary of Xiao Zhan, but that quickly changes. It happens during archery practice a week into his stay.
Xiao Zhan loves archery above all other kinds of martial arts, loves the way the world freezes for a heartbeat just before the release of the bowstring, loves the focus and inner stillness one needs to have in order to be good at it. And Xiao Zhan is, if he says so himself. Apparently, Wenhan thinks so too.
He takes one look at Xiao Zhan’s target, pierced with three arrows right at the centre, and declares in all his twelve-year-old glory, “You’re amazing at archery and pretty! if Yibo doesn’t marry you, I will!”
Xiao Zhan panics for a fraction of a second, because he’s just had a conversation with Wang Yibo about ignoring the marriage thing. Then he sees the way Wenhan is smirking and he’s suddenly sure the boy just said it to mess with his brother. Xiao Zhan should really say something polite and sensible in order to not offend anyone, but he can’t help but rise up to Wenhan’s mischievous challenge.
And so, “Ah, Your highness, I am extremely grateful for the offer. Anyone would be lucky to hear these words from such a distinguished and handsome prince!” Xiao Zhan smiles his sweetest smile and flutters his eyelashes for good measure.
Wenhan blushes, blinks, but then laughs, and Xiao Zhan’s smile turns genuine, while Yixuan lightly slaps the back of his brother’s head.
“Do you have no shame?!”
(In the resulting ruckus Xiao Zhan subtly checks Wang Yibo’s reaction, but there’s none that he can see. The boy just looses an arrow from his bow into a practice target).
It sets a precedent for all his interactions with the third prince. They joke and practice archery together. Wenhan is the one Xiao Zhan allows himself to relax with the most. Still, he never forgets why he’s here and what is expected of him, so he holds himself back even with this mischievous boy.
Of course, there’s also Seungyoun. After that first night he actually came to Xiao Zhan to apologise. This is how it went.
“I’ve been informed I should apologise to you. So. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said those things. Also probably shouldn’t have bitten you.”
“Um. Thank you? I get it though. You are just protecting your brother. I promise, I’m not here to make anyone’s life hard and I definitely am not going to make Wang Yibo do anything he doesn’t want to.”
“Okay. Good. I’m watching you though, remember it.”
“Alright, that’s fair.”
“… thanks for not complaining to anyone about what I did.”
“No problem.”
“But I’m still watching you!”
Xiao Zhan could barely hold his laughter until the boy left.
What does Seungyoun think is going to happen? That Xiao Zhan, at thirteen, is going to kidnap Wang Yibo, put him in red clothes and marry him?
Xiao Zhan would be annoyed but honestly, Seungyoun is adorable, with his menacing glares and furrowed eyebrows. Sometimes he forgets he is supposed to guard his twin from a foreign fiancé and laughs at something Xiao Zhan says instead. He’s got the cutest dimples at those moments and Xiao Zhan has to stop himself from poking the boy’s face. At least, until Seungyoun remembers his duty and abruptly furrows his eyebrows again. It goes back and forth like that, but Xiao Zhan is pretty confident in his ability to break the boy into liking him eventually.
Wang Yibo himself is still complicated. He never seeks Xiao Zhan out but neither does he avoid him. They mainly interact when they are in a group of people, most often with the other princes. He is still reserved, but not as silent as he was that first day.
Things change a few weeks after Xiao Zhan’s arrival though.
He takes to reading in the library for a few hours every day. He needs this time to sort of recharge. It’s the time when he doesn’t have to behave or mind what he says, and it helps him relax and handle his responsibilities better.
Some books here are the same as they are back home, but there’s a lot of new stuff too, traditional Luoyang folk tales, legends, historical texts and things like that. He chooses books at random, goes to a low table in the corner and just loses himself for a bit.
It’s during one of these times that Wang Yibo comes to the library and stumbles upon him.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt you. I was just looking for Han-ge, I thought he might be here.”
“I haven’t seen him here today, no,” Xiao Zhan replies.
It’s true, the library is empty most of the time, giving him a much-needed alone time.
“Okay, thank you,” the boy continues to just stand there, looking at Xiao Zhan. It’s not exactly awkward, but it’s getting there. “Um. What’re you reading?”
“It’s a text about the history of Luoyang. I’m currently on the warrior who was ambushed but was able to save his army due to some clever strategic thinking,” Xiao Zhan answers.
“Sounds interesting,” the boy fidgets but doesn’t move away.
“Do you enjoy these kinds of stories?” Xiao Zhan asks, mostly because he doesn’t know what else to do.
“I do! I want to become a warrior some day too!” Wang Yibo lights up, and it’s fascinating to see. “I practice with a sword every day. My teacher says it takes years to become good, but I think it’s worth it.”
“Yeah, I hear that from my teacher too,” Xiao Zhan laughs. “I don’t think it’s for me, though.”
He enjoys swordfighting to a certain degree and he’s doing okay as far as he can tell, but just doesn’t have enough drive to perfect it. He prefers to direct his efforts to archery instead.
“Oh. Well, it seems like you like archery much more,” Wang Yibo echoes his thoughts, “I don’t think I’ll be as good as you, but that’s okay. I’ll be the best swordsman in both our kingdoms. Don’t listen to Seungyoun, it will be me, not him!”
The little prince sounds so determined, so sure, that Xiao Zhan can’t help but be charmed.
Because of this, he offers, “Do you… want to listen to this? I’m about to begin the deciding battle,” he gestures to the book.
“Yeah, I don’t think I’ve read this one. Thank you.”
Wang Yibo sits across from him, taking care to arrange his robes neatly. It’s another set of green hanfu, this time a bit lighter in shade. Xiao Zhan can’t tell if the prince is really loyal to his kingdom’s colour or if he just likes green that much.
They sit like that for about an hour until Xiao Zhan’s voice become hoarse. They do finish the story, though. All this time Wang Yibo sits pretty still, only moving around to shift his legs every once in a while. It’s a revelation to Xiao Zhan, because, until now, he’s mostly seen the prince always moving around, be it practicing sword fighting, as he has said, or archery, or messing with his brothers. He gives an impression of an active child, so it’s strange to see him sitting still for such a long period of time.
It becomes a sort of a habit for them. Wang Yibo would show up every few days, Xiao Zhan would pick a book and read for as long as he can. They go through a few books, mostly history and fiction, with some poetry mixed-in. He can tell the little prince isn’t too into that last one, but Wang Yibo stubbornly insists on listening to the very end every time.
One day Xiao Zhan chooses a thin book with a simple black cover and starts reading while Wang Yibo sits down on the floor and tucks his legs in, ready for the evening. The story turns out to be about a man who makes a deal with evil spirits and gets blamed for everything that goes wrong in the world. He slowly breaks down, loses everyone around him despite all his sacrifices, and ends up consumed in equal measure by the black smoke inside of him and by the hatred outside.
Xiao Zhan has to pause right then, because everything in him just screams at the injustice of it all. He feels the man’s suffering as if it was his own. In the resulting silence he hears a hitched breath and it takes him a moment to realise it’s not his own.
Wang Yibo wipes his tears and says, “It’s not fair. He was just trying to help people. All he wanted was to give them a chance. Why did everyone hate him for that?”
“I don’t know,” Xiao Zhan answers, “I truly don’t know.”
He doesn’t have anything else to offer because he has to fight his own tears.
“It’s not fair,” the little prince repeats, “why did he have to suffer like this? Alone? No one that good should ever be alone. Was there really no one to support him at the end? To believe in him?”
Wang Yibo’s eyes are really big at this moment, wet and red from spilled tears.
“There are a few pages left. Maybe…” Xiao Zhan has to swallow a few times. He can’t stop imagining that broken man, standing all alone on a cliff, hated and despised for trying to do the right thing. The picture is too bleak. “Maybe something will happen.”
Something does happen. Just as the man is falling from the cliff, a person grabs his arm and calls for him.
The man still dies.
Wang Yibo shoots up, furious.
“So he did have someone! How could it not have changed anything? How could he still die?”
“I think he was too far gone. There was no saving him,” Xiao Zhan replies, devastated in a way he’s never been before. He’s never read or heard a story that moved him this much. “But I don’t think that last page hasn’t changed anything. He knew he was loved, knew there was one person who still believed in him, even after everything. It had to mean something.”
He’s crying, his own words not giving him any consolation whatsoever. This story is a tragedy, but Xiao Zhan knows, down to his very bones just knows it shouldn’t be one. The man was simply too bright, too full of dazzling light for his life to end like this. Especially if he was leaving somebody behind.
Lost in these thoughts, Xiao Zhan doesn’t notice Wang Yibo moving until the boy kneels in front of him and touches his forearm.
“This book is obviously unfinished,” Wang Yibo says. He’s not crying anymore. His eyes, while swollen, are bright and full of conviction. “The man has to get a second chance, or the whole story just makes no sense. Maybe he gets resurrected, I don’t know. But there has to be something. We just need to find a continuation, a part two.”
Xiao Zhan stares. The boy, clearly still shaken, is trying to comfort him. Little Wang Yibo, the youngest of five brothers, obviously loved, pampered and indulged by people around him, is trying to comfort Xiao Zhan, who is older than him by four years.
More than that, he seems to really believe in what he’s saying. He doesn’t like the ending, so he refuses to acknowledge it as one. Wang Yibo’s decided there has to be more, so, in his world, there is more.
It sounds completely unrealistic. It sounds like something a small child would say and then forget in a few months.
However. He looks at this nine-year-old boy, pudgy cheeks and all, and sincerely believes that he will at least try.
Xiao Zhan smiles. It grows and grows until he’s beaming at Wang Yibo. The boy grins back.
“Alright. Then let’s do our best to find it.”
Later, they try. There’s nothing among the rest of the books, and the librarian is of no help. They go to Wang Han, who Wang Yibo insists is the smartest, most literate man in the world, and he doesn’t know either, but promises to ask around. None of it seems to faze the little prince, so Xiao Zhan decides to be loyal to his conviction too.
They’ll find it.
***
All in all, these two months pretty much fly by. Xiao Zhan learns to enjoy Luoyang a great deal: the short trips to nearby towns; the people, less temperamental than he is used to, but lovely and kind nonetheless; the milder weather; the lessons; even the food.
Of course, most of his time is spent with the princes, which is kind of the whole point. He is relieved to see they are down to earth, kind, intelligent, welcoming, if snarky, mischievous and at times careless. By the end of the trip Xiao Zhan is ready to admit that they probably won’t kill each other in a fight for the throne. In fact, the sheer amount of times he has walked in on the two, three, four, even all five of them in a puppy pile is absurd.
Witnessing this kind of relationship between siblings makes him miss Lulu something fierce. The letters they’ve been exchanging are a poor substitute for the real thing. He misses his parents and friends, spicy hotpot and, gods, his own bed.
When the day comes, the royal family bids him an official farewell. Xiao Zhan thanks them for their hospitality, sincerely says that he’s enjoyed his time here and bows deeply. He exchanges goodbye smiles with Yixuan and Sungjoo, gets a wink from Wenhan. Seungyoun pouts at him.
Then, in an echo of his own words two months ago, he says, “I’ve been informed I should wish you a safe journey. So. Safe journey.”
Unlike two months ago, what follows is a wide smile with dimples out for anyone to see.
Xiao Zhan laughs in triumph.
“Thank you, Your highness,” he replies and bows even deeper than he did to the boy’s parents.
Seungyoun rolls his eyes but fails to wipe the smile off his face entirely.
Then there’s only Wang Yibo left. They look at each other for a moment. The little prince has his serious face on but doesn’t avoid eye contact or seem shy in any way. He nods at Xiao Zhan.
“See you next time,” Xiao Zhan says, a little hesitantly.
Wang Han’s advice has been working well for them. They haven’t mentioned anything pertaining the engagement, so Xiao Zhan is unsure whether it’s wise to remind the boy that they have regular visits scheduled for the next few years.
However it seems to be the right thing to say, because Wang Yibo smiles at him. It’s small, but Xiao Zhan feels the weight behind it. The little prince is free with his affection, but only when it comes to people he trusts. Xiao Zhan has seen him with his brothers and parents, with Wang Han, Da Zhangwei and Qian Feng, with some of the palace workers and teachers. With them, he’s a sweet, talkative, buoyant child. In turn, he becomes quiet, reserved and downright solemn around people he’s unfamiliar or uncomfortable with.
So getting a smile now, sincere and direct, one of the few he’s received from the boy, feels like a victory.
“See you next time,” Wang Yibo replies.
With that, Xiao Zhan gets into the carriage where Na-jie has been waiting.
He’s ready to go home.
3
Next time comes, as planned, two years later. Unlike planned, it turns out to be very brief.
At the beginning of May — late again for the peony festival — Xiao Zhan arrives in Luoyang. He isn't really nervous, mostly excited to see how much has changed and what has stayed the same. At fifteen, he feels better prepared to deal with the princes’ hijinks, especially since they’ve probably matured as well. He also promised to give Lulu a full report on the crown prince, since she’ll have to come in contact with him eventually, when she takes the throne.
Xiao Zhan doesn’t expect to deliver any juicy gossip though. He’s almost sure Yixuan is even more responsible now, more dedicated to his studies and duties. Probably even more of a mother hen to his brothers, too.
The royal siblings greet him cordially, no frostiness in sight. The familiarity they built last time is still there, which makes things a lot easier.
Yixuan has hit his growth spurt, much like Xiao Zhan. Just for the sake of posterity, with no smugness at all, Xiao Zhan notes that he himself is actually the tallest one here.
However, still not as tall as Ayunga, who keeps gloating about it right in Xiao Zhan’s face, the bastard.
The others too have grown to some degree.
Wang Yibo, though. He still looks thin in his — green — hanfu. His face has lost some of its chubbiness but is still adorably round, so considering how much Xiao Zhan towers over him now, he fails to not seem exactly what he is: an eleven-year-old child.
It doesn’t help that he takes one look at Xiao Zhan and gapes, eyes wide.
“Gege, you’re so tall…”
The gege part seems involuntary, but Xiao Zhan takes note of it nonetheless.
Somewhere to the right, Seungyoun snickers.
Wang Yibo seems to take ahold of himself and schools his features.
“Did you find it?” he asks.
“No.” Xiao Zhan did try. There was no trace of their book or its continuation back in Chongqing. “You?”
“Not yet.”
Xiao Zhan can’t stop his smile. Two years have done nothing to quell the boy’s stubbornness.
It’s a relief.
***
The day of his arrival is mostly spent catching up. Turns out Da Zhangway got married (it was the most ridiculous courtship, Xiao Zhan, it’s a shame you weren’t here for that), Yixuan had his first crush (shut up, Wenhan), Prince Yixing from the He Xing Wu Qi kingdom came for the flower festival this year (I think we all kinda had a crush on him), Wang Han once again was unofficially voted as a favourite counsel member (he pretended it wasn’t a big deal but was insufferably smug that whole day) and, most recently, lady Cheng Xiao managed to disarm Yibo in a sword fight during practice (the look on his face… he’s been trying to master that move for days now).
They make plans to go riding and swimming, the brothers promise to introduce him to their new teachers and take him out during the upcoming music festival Da Zhangwei has been working on. Wang Yibo is so passionate about sword training with his You-laoshi and Zin-laoshi that Xiao Zhan even considers going with him and Seungyoun to brush up on his own skills.
Except they don’t get to do any of it.
In the morning of his third day in Luoyang Xiao Zhan fails to find anyone in their usual places, even Na-jie when he goes to ask her what happened. It is obvious that something did, not in the least because servants seem highly agitated but avoid answering any of his questions.
Finally, after fifteen stressful minutes Na-jie finds him.
“What’s wrong?” he asks without preamble.
“It’s Prince Yibo. Come,” she starts moving immediately and Xiao Zhan scrambles to follow. “He collapsed during morning training.”
“Is he. Is he—” Xiao Zhan is suddenly too scared to ask out loud.
Worst-case scenarios swarm his head like bees. He mentally shakes himself. No need to panic, he has to stay rational. Surely, the little prince isn’t—
“Oh. Oh! Your highness,” Na-jie finally stops and touches his arm, “Zhanzhan, he’s just unconscious.”
Xiao Zhan breathes out.
“He’s been like that for a few hours though. Court physicians have been trying to figure out what’s wrong with him. I didn’t wake you up because there was nothing to tell yet. But as of twenty minutes ago he was about to wake up, so I went to find you.”
“Then we must hurry. Let’s go!”
When they get there, it’s just in time to see Wang Han exiting the room. While the door is sliding shut Xiao Zhan glimpses the king and queen and their sons crowded around the bed. Wang Han himself looks deathly pale, worry evident in every line of his face.
Then he notices them.
“Oh. You’re here,” the man straightens his shoulders and tries to wipe the expression of defeat from his face.
He doesn’t entirely succeed.
“How is he?” Xiao Zhan hurriedly bows and asks.
“The prince is awake now. But I’m afraid he won’t be up for quite some time.”
“What’s… what’s wrong with him?”
“He needs to be monitored for a few more days, but it looks like the problem is with his heart,” Wang Han has to clear his throat before he continues. “The physician says it’s… faulty somehow. It doesn’t work the way it should. The irregularity causes chest pain and makes breathing difficult. Physical activity makes it worse, that’s why he collapsed during his morning practice.”
Xiao Zhan can’t fully process what’s being said to him. He’s heard about similar illness back at home, but always as an offhand comment, something that happened to unfamiliar people, vague even in his head.
It doesn’t seem right to hear the same thing about Wang Yibo. He’s an active kid that spends most of his time in motion. He is wilful and stubborn to an absurd degree. How could his heart fail him?
It sounds like something straight out of some tale, like the ones Xiao Zhan has read in dozens. Except he can’t just randomly aid an immortal spirit that will then cure Wang Yibo in gratitude.
As dumbfounded as he is, Xiao Zhan still can’t ignore Wang Han’s red-rimmed eyes. It’s barely noticeable but it is there nonetheless. He knows the man has a soft spot for the youngest prince, so, tentatively, not sure if he’s allowed, he reaches out and touches Wang Han’s arm.
“Wang Han-laoshi. If I may,” Xiao Zhan widens his eyes a bit, puts on a soft smile and adopts a gentle tone of voice that works both on spooked animals and every so often actual people. He’s been learning to use this combination to his advantage, and now seems a good time to put it to use. “The most important thing here is that he’s awake, right? Everything else is just… an obstacle. I’m sure he will have a solid support system. We will all do our best to manage the situation and make sure Prince Yibo will be fine.”
Some part of Xiao Zhan believes in what he’s saying, but the rest of him is screaming that he doesn’t know what he’s talking about, hasn’t even seen Wang Yibo yet to make such declarations. Still, Xiao Zhan is a prince himself. What good is he if can’t bring any comfort and positivity to people around him?
Wang Han relaxes a little under his touch and even masters up a small smile.
“Indeed,” he looks at Xiao Zhan intently. “You’ve grown up quite a bit in the last two years, young man. Learned some new tricks too, I see.”
Ah. Well. Wang Han has always seemed like he could see right through people, this isn’t surprising at all. Xiao Zhan got what he wanted anyway — the man has lost some of his ghostly pallor. Trick or not, it actually works, Xiao Zhan thinks with satisfaction.
“Well, never mind that,” Wang Han continues. “Do you want to go see him?”
This sobers Xiao Zhan up very quickly.
“No. He should be with his family. I can visit later.”
Wang Han hums in agreement and then adds, “I can let you know when the timing is good, if you want.”
“Thank you, I’d appreciate it.”
Xiao Zhan glances at the closed door.
It’s fine. He can wait.
***
So he does. Wang Han gives him a go ahead in the evening, so he comes up to Wang Yibo’s door just as the sun is setting. Before he can enter, however, Xiao Zhan spots Seungyoun sitting on the floor nearby, curved into a ball.
He briefly debates whether it’s any of his business, but in the end can’t just ignore the boy. He kneels in front of the prince and quietly calls out his name.
Seungyoun lifts his head and, yeah, he’s definitely been crying.
“Hey,” Xiao Zhan says, using the gentlest voice possible.
There’s a fifty-fifty chance the boy will lash out. He may like Xiao Zhan now, to a certain degree, but it’s different from actually wanting him there at a time like this.
“Yibo kicked me out, said I should get some dinner,” Seungyong stares at him with wide eyes. “But I… I couldn’t…”
“Couldn’t just leave him like that?” Xiao Zhan suggests.
It seems to break the dam. Seungyoun pitches forward, buries his face in Xiao Zhan’s chest and starts sobbing his heart out. It goes on for a while, with Xiao Zhan awkwardly petting the boy’s head and feeling inadequate.
It’s all wrong. Seungyoun is actually the sunniest person Xiao Zhan knows. He’s got an adorable smile with dimples, loud infectious laughter, and boundless energy that makes him run around creating chaos wherever he goes. He shouldn’t ever be brought to the point of utter devastation like this.
After some time, the boy quiets down and slowly leans back.
“I’m sorry,” Seungyoun says in a small voice. ”I’ve been trying to keep it together for the sake of my brothers, they’ve got enough to worry about as it is. I shouldn’t have poured it all on you instead.”
“Nah, it’s fine. I’m just glad you didn’t bite me this time,” Xiao Zhan says, trying to make the boy laugh.
It works. Time to go on the offensive.
“Seungyoun, nothing is set in stone yet. The physician hasn’t said anything definitive, right?”
“I guess, but—”
Xiao Zhan doesn’t give him a chance to finish, “So please don’t despair just yet. What do you think? Is Yibo going to be alright?”
“How could I possibly—”
“You are his twin, aren’t you? You are closer to him than anyone else. So what do you think? Knowing his character and abilities, knowing what he can and can’t handle. What does your gut tell you?”
Xiao Zhan looks at the prince intently, willing him to listen, to draw the kind of conclusions Xiao Zhan wants him to. It’s silent for a long moment. Seungyoun seems to really mull it over.
Then he says, “I mean. It’s Yibo. He can do anything. So… So he’ll be fine.”
He starts out hesitant but seems surer with every word.
He looks Xiao Zhan dead in the eye, nods and repeats, “Yeah, it’s gonna be fine.”
“There you go,” Xiao Zhan says, smiling. “But in the meantime you need to take care of yourself too, you have to be strong for him. Imagine if you collapsed too. He would be up in a heartbeat, and then where would we be.”
Seungyoun laughs, “He would, wouldn’t he? He’s an idiot.”
It sounds terribly fond.
“Come on, you should really get something to eat,” Xiao Zhan urges, “I promise I’ll stay with him for now.”
He gets up and offers the boy a hand. Seungyoun takes it and gets on his feet but doesn’t let go right away. He squeezes Xiao Zhan’s fingers.
“Thank you,” he says.
“No problem.”
Xiao Zhan waits until the boy is out of sight and drops his smile.
This worked surprisingly well, considering he was bullshitting his way through the whole thing.
He’s been trying to keep people’s spirits up, give them some measure of hope, but the truth is, he hasn’t even seen Wang Yibo yet. And from the sound of it, the situation is pretty bleak. His insides have been all twisted up this whole time, and he doesn’t know if going in now would make it better or worse.
Well, there’s only one way to find out.
Xiao Zhan’s first thought after finally looking at the little prince is this:
How the fuck could Seungyoun believe anything he said just now.
Wang Yibo is on the bed, propped against what seems like a dozen pillows. His skin is ashen in the rays of the setting sun that peek through the window. His breathing is laboured, as if drawing air into his lungs is an ordeal instead of a natural thing his body should do. He opens his eyes at the sound of footsteps.
“Xiao Zhan?”
Just these two words make him double over, struggling for air. He starts coughing.
“Hey, hey, no need to get so excited over me!” Xiao Zhan hurries to his side.
It takes a while, but Wang Yibo takes control over his breathing again, making it measured and slow. He seems to be making a conscious effort, as if he’s been taught to do so. Which he probably was, today.
Xiao Zhan fights to not let any emotions show on his face. He guesses Wang Yibo isn’t the kind of person that would appreciate pity.
“Don’t look at me like that,” the boy rasps, “I’m already much better.”
Alright, so Xiao Zhan has to work on his expression management. Noted.
“Have you seen Seungyoun?” Wang Yibo grimaces a little and wraps an arm around his chest, but continues. “He looked kinda mad when he left.”
“I saw him on the way here, he’s okay.” It’s not technically a lie, the boy wasn’t crying anymore when they parted ways. “He went to get dinner.”
“Oh, good, I didn’t think he’d listen to me.”
The brief conversation seems to have depleted whatever reserves Wang Yibo had. He leans back and closes his eyes.
They sit quietly for a while.
Then Wang Yibo sighs.
“I’m bored.”
“Are you for real?” Xiao Zhan gapes. The boy collapsed in the morning, spent a few hours unconscious, woke up barely able to breathe from the pain in his chest, but the thing he now chooses to complain about is boredom? Xiao Zhan can’t stop his next words, “Wang Yibo, are you human?”
“What? I’ve been here all day and there’s nothing to do.”
Xiao Zhan is still reeling from hearing the prince’s priorities when Wang Yibo, very intently not looking at him, asks softly, “Gege, will you read to me?”
Here he is with gege again. Whether he’s finally let himself completely relax around Xiao Zhan or is just too tired to mind what he says, it’s actually kinda nice that they’ve somehow got to this point.
“Sure, didi.”
Wang Yibo’s ears redden a little, which looks weird considering how grey his face is right now.
Xiao Zhan fetches a book and they spend a few hours like that: him reading out loud, like he used to, and Wang Yibo shallowly breathing on the bed with a few coughing fits from time to time.
The next few days are like that too. Sometimes they are joined by the other princes, sometimes it’s just the two of them, but Xiao Zhan always tries to spend at least an hour or two entertaining the boy. Wang Yibo gets marginally better with the help of some herbs, but it’s not enough to let him off bedrest.
The whole palace is quiet and sort of listless. A man from a nearby village comes by and leaves a huge basket of newly picked flowers. He says that the news have spread fast, and the people are worried about the youngest prince and wish him a speedy recovery.
Seungyoun barely leaves his twin’s side, even requests to be temporarily moved into Wang Yibo’s rooms. Wenhan and Sungjoo do their best to keep everyone’s spirits up, but their own worry and tiredness is evident. Yixuan probably has it hardest of the four brothers: as a crown prince, he can’t just pause his studies, he has to continue doing his duty to the kingdom.
He himself tries to be as unobtrusive and helpful a possible, but there isn’t much he can do, except relieve them from their vigil at Wang Yibo’s bedside from time to time.
Xiao Zhan spots the king and queen visiting their son a few times. It’s a sad picture and makes him miss his own parents.
On the fifth day, Na-jie finds him in the library. Xiao Zhan takes one look at her face and braces himself.
“Zhanzhan, the physician had another meeting with the king and queen. The prince’s condition isn’t getting much better. It seems that this wasn’t just a one time thing, it’s a serious illness. He’ll have to be in bed for weeks. Properly treated, however, the illness shouldn’t make the usual day-to-day life difficult, once he recovers.”
It sounds serious and exhausting, but like things are going to be alright eventually. None of it warrants the expression on Na-jie’s face.
“There’s more, isn’t there?” Xiao Zhan asks quietly.
Na-jie sighs. She’s a direct person and has high emotional intelligence, so she doesn’t drag this out.
“The physician also said that strenuous physical activity, even after recovery, could lead to a relapse. There have been cases, he said, where the patients died a few years after the initial collapse.”
Xiao Zhan swallows. He thinks he knows where this is going, “Strenuous physical activity like…”
“Wang Yibo is not a farmer, so he should be able to live a relatively normal life. Each case is different, but running or swimming and things like that are usually fine, in moderation. But as to being a soldier, a warrior…” here Na-jie pauses.
She doesn’t have to continue. Xiao Zhan knows just how strenuous an activity sword fighting is.
“He’ll be devastated.” Even as he says it, Xiao Zhan can feel the inadequacy of the words.
There’s hardly a person in this palace who doesn’t know about Wang Yibo’s greatest wish. And it’s not an empty wish either: even during Xiao Zhan’s last visit, he trained daily; in the first three days of this visit, before things went wrong, he was always up with Seungyoun before sunrise to go to practice. Xiao Zhan was slowly gearing up to join them some time.
Except. It’s not possible now, is it?
Xiao Zhan swallows. There’s something icy-cold squeezing his insides. He remembers a nine-year-old boy proudly declaring his intention to become the best warrior in the kingdom.
“Zhanzhan,” Na-jie breaks through his misery, “that’s not all.”
“There’s more?” he laughs bitterly, not sure what could possibly follow such news.
“We’re leaving tomorrow at dawn. The royal family has enough on their plate, they don’t need to entertain a delegation from another kingdom right now.”
Xiao Zhan wants to protest. He doesn’t need to be entertained. He just wants… What kind of person would he be, to leave in a situation like this? Then again, what could he possibly do? A few hours a day spent with the prince won’t be of much help, not to Wang Yibo, not to his brothers.
And anyway, Na-jie doesn’t do anything without thinking it through first. Xiao Zhan trusts her judgement.
“Okay. I understand,” he nods.
“Thank you. I get that this is hard for you but it’s the right thing to do.”
“Yeah. I’m sorry, I’m gonna go now, I have to at least tell him myself.”
Except that when he gets there and starts opening the door to Wang Yibo’s rooms, he hears sobbing.
Xiao Zhan freezes. Is that… What should he do? The only other time he’s heard Yibo cry was over their book, but this is different. The boy’s life has just changed its trajectory. The thing that’s been driving him for years, making him work and sweat and become better every day has been taken away. What could Xiao Zhan even say? He can’t bullshit his way through this.
Thankfully, he hears Wang Han’s voice just then. In the small slit between the door and the wall Xiao Zhan sees him hugging Wang Yibo, saying something too softly to make out from outside.
Xiao Zhan quietly backs out.
This is private. This is between Wang Yibo and the person he trusts with his heartbreak.
Xiao Zhan tries to ignore his own heart that breaks for the boy at this very moment.
***
He waits for as long as he can.
He readies for tomorrow’s departure. He bids farewell to the king and queen, and then finds the four princes. If he expects any accusations about leaving when things get hard, there are none. They are withdrawn but understanding, which probably proves that Na-jie was right.
“It’s alright, Xiao Zhan,” Yixuan says, “there’s nothing you can do here.”
It stings, even if it isn’t meant to.
Seungyoun looks at him really intently and then suddenly hugs him. At twelve, the boy is much shorter than him, so all Xiao Zhan is able to do is wrap one arm around Seungyoun’s shoulders and put a hand on the back of his head. They both grip each other tightly.
“It’s gonna be fine, like you said. One way or another,” Xiao Zhan murmurs.
The boy doesn’t answer, just squeezes him harder.
After that, Xiao Zhan is out of excuses. He can’t go to Yibo in the morning, before dawn, so the only time is now, late in the evening, with the moon and the stars shining bright, as if mocking all of them.
He doesn’t necessarily think Yibo is still crying, hours later, but is nonetheless relieved to find him just drowsing. Even in the soft glow of the lanterns, he seems grey and unhealthy, with purple smudges under his eyes. He is thin and so, so tiny.
Xiao Zhan just looks for a long moment, trying to commit to memory Wang Yibo as he is now. Who knows how this illness will change him. Who knows what Xiao Zhan will find in two years.
Then he calls out softly, “Didi.”
One word is enough to make the boy stir. He blinks up and gasps for air but then remembers his breathing exercises. Xiao Zhan waits him out, coming closer to the bed in the meantime.
“Sorry for waking you up.”
“It’s fine,” Wang Yibo replies, his breathing mostly under control.
Neither of them say anything else. Wang Yibo knows that he knows. But Xiao Zhan can’t bring himself to say anything about that. He’s got no consolation words. He’s got nothing.
So he stars with something the boy doesn’t know. “I’m leaving first thing tomorrow. Luoyang doesn’t need a distraction right now. We don’t want to be in the way.”
“Oh.”
Wang Yibo doesn’t look sad or surprised. He doesn’t much look like anything. Xiao Zhan doesn’t like it. It feels like being brought back to the very start.
And so, against the promise he’s given to Na-jie and against even his own judgement, he says, “If you’d like me to stay, for any reason, I will talk to Na-jie and ask her to let me remain here.”
“Are you stupid?”
Xiao Zhan sputters, because it is easily the rudest thing the boy has ever said to him. Maybe they haven’t regressed to the starting point after all.
Wang Yibo furrows his eyebrows and manages a somewhat severe gaze. “Of course you should go! You should enjoy the rest of your summer at home. I’m sorry for ruining your time here as it is.”
“You haven’t ruined anything,” Xiao Zhan protests.
“My illness then, whatever, it doesn’t matter. The point is, you should go. What would you even do here? I basically can’t get out of bed. You can’t read to me all day every day. You’d go insane.”
“I would do it if you asked me to.”
Xiao Zhan’s words aren’t loud, but full of conviction. He looks directly into Wang Yibo’s eyes as he says it.
Which is why he sees the boy’s expression change. For the first time this evening the little prince looks like someone who was shaking apart just a few hours ago.
“Thank you,” Wang Yibo’s voice isn’t trembling or anything, but it doesn’t sound like it normally does either. “But there’s no need.”
“Okay,” Xiao Zhan nods and repeats, just to say something, “okay.”
“I’ll be fine in any case. Do you know just how much fuss my brothers are capable of? I’ll be begging for alone time in a week,” Wang Yibo’s tone turns wry.
Xiao Zhan huffs, “That’s true. Well, I guess I should be going then.”
“Yeah.”
“I’ll see you next time,” he tries to smile, with moderate success, as he gets up.
“See you next time,” the boy echoes.
There’s a sudden sharp cry of ‘Xiao Zhan!’ when he is almost at the door.
He doesn’t have to try to commit what happens next to memory. Xiao Zhan will remember it with perfect clarity for the rest of his life.
He’ll remember the warm light coming from the peony-shaped lanterns.
And a huge bed with a small boy in it.
And a scorching fire in the boy’s tired eyes.
And the steel in Wang Yibo’s voice as he says, “It doesn’t change anything. Whatever the physician says, I’m gonna be the exception if I have to. I will be a warrior. I will master sword fighting. You just have to wait and see. I will do it.”
Xiao Zhan’s heart skips a beat. He stares and stares and stares. How exactly did Wang Yibo go from utter devastation to this unshakable resolve in the space of one day? Should an eleven-year-old even be capable of it? Or anyone, for that matter?
He is starting to think that maybe Wang Yibo’s stubbornness is one of a kind.
“Alright. I look forward to it.”
4
Life goes on. In the next two years Xiao Zhan delves into the laws of Chongqing, wanting to be of use in the future. It’s what is expected of him anyway.
However he also finally asks for an art teacher. He’s had some basic lessons at an early age and has been idly doodling and drawing from time to time for years. Now he decides to pursue this interest seriously even if it is not particularly useful.
(He may have done this thinking of a boy with a broken dream. Determination is one thing, but limitations of body and health are another. Xiao Zhan thinks himself a rational, practical person, so even if he hopes, and he does, in all truth he doesn’t except much to come out of that determination).
He continues practicing with a bow, every day, knowing now that being able to do so is a gift. That’s how he makes a friend. Wang Zhuocheng is new in the city, eager to learn archery from the best teachers in the kingdom. He’s the sweetest, most earnest kid, and Xiao Zhan and Lulu instantly take him under their wing.
Zhuocheng has a cat. Looking at him with his Danta, Xiao Zhan finally breaks and, with permission from his parents, gets himself one too. Jianguo is the prettiest, smartest, most charming, elegant lady in the world. Xiao Zhan would die for her in a heartbeat.
Then Ji Li gets wind of all this and the three of them basically form a cat lovers club. Ziyi laughs at them but is actually crazier about her dog than any one of them.
Xiao Zhan also has a brief thing with Lord Sehun, when a delegation from the EXO kingdom comes to Chongqing.
“I hear he’s pretty good with his sword,” Yu Bin says, exaggeratedly wiggling his eyebrows.
Xiao Zhan snorts. Crude jokes aside, Sehun really is impressive, and Xiao Zhan knows Yu Bin, being a fantastic swordsman-in-training himself, truly does mean it in a serious way.
“But aren’t you engaged, technically?” his friend continues.
“The key word here is technically, Binbin.”
Xiao Zhan doesn’t really see a problem here. His potential marriage to Wang Yibo will not come up for years. He can’t be expected to remain celibate in honour of something that might not even happen. So he enjoys his time with Sehun, finds out quite a few things about himself, and they part ways amicably when the delegation’s visit comes to an end.
Two years go by just like that.
It’s actually Wang Yibo’s turn to come to Chongqing, since at thirteen he is deemed old enough to travel that far. But Xiao Zhan specifically requests to go to Luoyang, allegedly to finally see the famed peony festival. In truth, he just can’t get the image of sick Wang Yibo out of his mind. Logically, it doesn’t make sense. A few months after Xiao Zhan had come home Wang Han sent a letter with news of the prince’s recovery. But recovery doesn’t guarantee a lack of relapse in the future. The distance between their two kingdoms is sizeable, and Xiao Zhan really, really doesn’t want to hear Wang Yibo struggling for air to the point of blacking out ever again. Better to be safe than sorry.
So in March he says goodbye to everyone, kisses Jianguo one last time and leaves with Na-jie, as always, by his side.
The journey to Luoyang actually takes less time than usual due to a lesser amount of flooding this spring. Because of that, there’s no welcoming delegation when they arrive early in the morning. By sheer luck, Yixuan, Sungjoo and Wenhan spot them from the inner courtyard and rush to greet them.
They all hurriedly bow to each other.
“Xiao Zhan, Na Ying-laoshi! You’re here!” the crown prince says. “We were expecting you tomorrow at the very earliest. That’s why we haven’t even sent out scouts yet, I’m sorry!”
“We should be the ones apologising for the inconvenience. I hope it isn’t too much trouble,” Na-jie replies, ever the diplomat.
“No, no, of course not! We’re mostly ready anyway.”
Xiao Zhan takes the opportunity to study the boys. It’s kinda hard to even call them that anymore. At eighteen, Yixuan looks every inch the heir to the throne that he is: tall (still not as tall as Xiao Zhan), handsome, more a man than a boy now. Sungjoo has grown up too, if slightly less than his brother. His cheekbones are very pronounced and make him look older than he is. Wenhan, being fifteen, is still catching up with them, but his features have become freakishly pretty. Xiao Zhan can’t help thinking it spells out trouble for everyone.
Sungjoo takes him out of this contemplative state by clasping his shoulder.
“It’s good to see you. It’s been too long,” he says.
“Yeah,” Xiao Zhan smiles and then remembers something. “Oh! I brought with me a couple of sheets with new songs from Chongqing, I think you’ll like them.”
“Cool, let’s try them out later!”
Xiao Zhan doesn’t get to reply because Wenhan chooses this moment to be a little shit.
“Wait, you brought Sungjoo a present? That’s not fair! Did you bring anything for me?”
“Why of course I did,” it’s amazingly easy to go back to this dynamic even after all these years. “Myself. I’m still amazing at archery and pretty, you know.”
At his side, Na-jie snorts. Yixuan groans with exasperation.
Wenhan doesn’t show a lick of shame at his own words from four years ago being thrown at him.
He laughs, “Of course you are. I would ask you to marry me right now but I’m afraid we don’t have the right audience for that. Speaking of which,” he turns to Na-jie, “Na Ying-laoshi, can we steal your prince for a while?”
“No, we have to greet your parents first,” she says, not impressed with any of them.
The brothers exchange glances. It’s not suspicious at all.
Then Yixuan steps forward, “Na Ying-laoshi, maybe you could allow me to escort you to the rooms we’ve prepared for you? You could freshen up a bit, I’m sure the road here was quite bothersome.” Wow. He’s in a full-on prince mode now. “I promise they will return Xiao Zhan in one piece in, let’s say, half an hour? My parents need to be notified beforehand anyway, I’m sure they won’t mind.”
“Na-jie, please? I know they are doing this on purpose, but it’s working, I’m properly intrigued,” Xiao Zhan asks her, but keeps his eyes on the brothers.
She hesitates but finally gives in. “Fine. Half an hour, not a minute more. Don’t make me look bad in front of the king and queen.”
After a chorus of thank yous they all bow to her and Xiao Zhan is whisked away by Wenhan and Sungjoo.
“It’s actually perfect timing on your part, Xiao Zhan,” Sungjoo says as they head towards… Actually, Xiao Zhan has no idea where they’re going. “We can get this out of the way so there are no awkward questions.”
They finally arrive at the training field. It's still early, but there are already a few people locked in practice matches. Xiao Zhan doesn’t really understand what he’s doing here until he squints and makes out Seungyoun talking to someone across the field.
Is this what the brothers made such a big fuss about? It’s nice to see the boy, but Xiao Zhan expected someth—
There’s a loud clank as two swords meet each other.
Xiao Zhan involuntary glances in the direction of the sound.
Oh.
Oh.
The opponents break apart, and one of them does some kind of spin that puts him a few feet away.
It’s Wang Yibo.
The two figures are motionless for a few heartbeats, during which Xiao Zhan has an unobstructed view of his face. It’s calm, focused. He’s not out of breath at all.
Then they are off again.
Something squeezes Xiao Zhan’s throat and refuses to let go.
Little Wang Yibo with a faulty heart. The one who lay in that huge bed of his, tiny, pale and miserable. The one who struggled for every breath, as if he had to fight the universe just to exist. The one whose dream has been deemed impossible.
Xiao Zhan hadn’t really thought the boy could fulfil the promise given on their last parting. There are just some things people can’t go against: laws of nature, inevitability of time, limitations of the body. No amount of stubbornness can go against reason.
And yet.
Wang Yibo jumps and twirls, parries his opponent’s sword and manoeuvres his own, strikes with strength and precision. Through it all, his heart keeps beating. He doesn’t clutch his chest or sway with dizziness.
Xiao Zhan’s world shifts at this moment, just a bit. The little prince has made the improbable — almost impossible — happen. Maybe, Xiao Zhan thinks, with enough determination, you can bend the world and its rules to your will.
“For a few months he couldn’t get out of bed much, his heart would give him trouble,” Sungjoo starts explaining from somewhere far away, it seems. “It was… hard. Seungyoun actually stopped training, said he didn’t want to be a swordsman if Yibo couldn’t do it too.”
Sungjoo pauses for a moment, choked up a bit, but Xiao Zhan can’t take his eyes off Yibo to make sure he’s okay.
After a while, Sangjoo continues, “But Yibo got better. Almost immediately picked up a sword again. We had a huge fight about that. He wouldn’t listen to anyone, not even mom and dad, or Han-ge. So we made a deal. Yibo could continue his training, but in turn he’d have to go to daily check-ups and drink a shitload of medicinal concoctions. He also had to basically start from scratch, because he was in a really bad shape after all that bed rest. He wasn’t upset about it at all though. Even after really gruelling rounds, he kept smiling.”
Xiao Zhan hesitates to even blink, afraid that Yibo will disappear like some sort of apparition.
The thing is, he does seem to be an apparition, and not only due to insurmountable odds of him being here, doing this.
Yibo is light on his feet, elegant and graceful in a way a thirteen-year-old shouldn’t be. He’s better than Xiao Zhan has ever been. He’s better than Sehun and Yu Bin. It’s not even about his technic or strength of his blows, he obviously has yet a lot to learn. But it’s the way he moves, almost like he’s dancing instead of fighting. It’s difficult to look away from him.
Xiao Zhan kinda has to, though, when Seungyoun barrels into him out of nowhere.
“You’re early!”
The prince is hugging him, and Xiao Zhan, just for a second, basks in a wave of smugness about having tamed him so thoroughly.
“Wow, nice to see you too, kid.”
At that, Seungyoun indignantly draws back. “Are you blind? I’m at least a teenager by now!”
He really is. He’s lost some of his boyishness, but somehow got even cuter. What the hell are they feeding the princes in Luoyang?
But if he thinks Xiao Zhan will admit any of it, he’s got another thing coming. “Of course you are, kid.”
At this, Wenhan bursts out laughing, “Aw, Seungyouney, you still have a lot of growing to do—”
“You’re only a year older than me, asshole!”
The resulting argument doesn’t gain momentum because Wang Yibo is suddenly right there.
“Xiao Zhan!” He blasts right through any awkwardness there might have been. “Did you see me? I told you I’d do it.”
Wow. Okay. A minute ago Xiao Zhan was overcome with awe of Yibo, now he’s sort of overcome with incredulity at the boy’s shamelessness.
He’s earned it though, hasn’t he?
“I guess you did do it.” Oh no, Xiao Zhan sounds disgustingly fond even to his own ears.
Then again, Yibo has just kinda tilted Xiao Zhan’s world on its axis, so maybe that’s excusable on his part.
Yibo smiles, wide and pleased. His face has lost some of its roundness, but the smile makes his cheeks bunch up in an exaggerated way.
Involuntary, Xiao Zhan beams back.
“Ah, sorry to interrupt your moment,” it’s bold of Wenhan to say this, since he’s been bickering with Seungyoun the whole time, “but Na Ying-laoshi will kill us if stay here much longer.”
They catch the twins up and and sprint to the courtyard where they are supposed to meet up with Na-jie.
(Xiao Zhan checks, subtly. Yibo’s breathing still sounds normal).
They get there just in time, do a new round of bowing and head towards the main hall to greet the king and queen. Na-jie catches his elbow at the last moment, when most of the princes have moved further in.
“Zhanzhan, you can’t go in like this, look at you,” she points at his robes which got messed up after running.
Xiao Zhan starts fixing the mess but gets distracted when he glimpses a look of unholy glee on Yibo’s face. The boy soundlessly mouths Zhanzhan.
Ah. It must be the first time he hears Xiao Zhan addressed this way. Na-jie is usually formal and professional in public, when she hasn’t been made to wait for half an hour.
“Don’t you dare,” Xiao Zhan squints menacingly.
“What? You don’t like ‘Zhanzhan’?” Yibo’s expression is outright evil now. “How about… A-Zhan? No? Xiao Zhan-gege? Zhan-ge?”
Still hoping to discourage the boy, he counterattacks, “How should I address you then? Yibo-didi? Bo-di?”
“Of course Zhan-ge can address me in whatever manner he chooses!”
“Gentlemen. This is fascinating and all, and I’m especially happy to see your highness Prince Yibo in such high spirits, but we really need to go now,” Na-jie seems to be holding back an eye roll with impressive stoicism.
“Certainly, Na Ying-laoshi!” Yibo all but chirps, already walking towards the huge doors where his brothers are waiting. “I apologise for taking up so much of Zhan-ge’s time!”
Xiao Zhan sighs.
The brat wins this one.
***
If Xiao Zhan had known that the first ‘Zhan-ge’ would be the end of his peaceful life, he would’ve tried to save his sanity and gagged Yibo.
As it is, the next two months go something like this:
Zhan-ge, let’s go swimming!
They do, and Xiao Zhan ends up being pushed into a lake by Seungyoun and Yibo. He isn’t too mad about that, since later Yixuan helps him dunk the twins so many times the little shits are gasping for air before it’s all over.
(He keeps a careful, careful watch. Yibo continues breathing okay through all of it).
Zhan-ge, you’ve got to try these rice noodles! It’s our specialty, you don’t want to offend the Kingdom of Luoyang, do you?
It’s delicious, if not spicy enough. Just to be contrary, Xiao Zhan deems the dish ‘okay’. Totally worth it for the way Yibo sputters in indignation and demands him to eat more, insisting there must be something wrong with Xiao Zhan’s mouth.
Zhan-ge, come on, show us your superior archery skills!
His skills are superior. However Wenhan and Sungjoo have gotten better over the years too. Sungjoo even wins one out of three turns in the friendly competition they stage. Xiao Zhan suspects Wenhan may beat all of them when he fully grows into his body.
Seungyoun is pretty good too. Actually, while his main interest lies with sword fighting, he is insanely talented with all kinds of weapons. Xiao Zhan doesn’t know if it’s something he’s been born with or just a consequence of his restlessness, a constant need to move and do something.
Yibo is good, has all the potential to be amazing, but it’s evident the bow just doesn’t hold the same appeal for him as his sword. Still, Xiao Zhan wonders if some day he can make the boy polish his archery skills.
Yixuan is kinda average, but makes them all eat shit when he gets out a crossbow. He’s insanely fast and accurate, to a scary degree.
Zhan-ge, hurry up, we’re about to head out, we can’t be late! I thought you were the old, responsible one!
Xiao Zhan sputters at being called old, but complies, so they manage to get to the peony festival on time.
As expected, it’s stunning.
There’s an explosion of colour. Pink, red, yellow, purple and, most beautiful of all, white peonies cover the town, sometimes in whole fields, sometimes in perfectly shaped flower sculptures placed in the main squares. People wear peonies in their hair, minstrels sing songs in adoration of the flower. Appropriately shaped little lanterns float in the water and, once it gets dark, make everything seem dream-like. Xiao Zhan’s inner artist itches to get his hands on some ink and paper to capture the magnificence .
There’s a play about Luoyang’s history, food stalls line the streets, people going from one to another, eating, drinking, chatting, admiring the lit-up town. Xiao Zhan knows it’s only a part of the whole celebration, that neighbouring towns and villages all representing the kingdom during the festival, but it’s the liveliest, most impressive part.
It would be nice to stroll around the streets as commoner, without the royal entourage and all the guards. Still, this whole day turns out to be exciting in the most pleasing ways.
Zhan-ge, wake up, come to the training field with us!
To be fair, Xiao Zhan doesn’t need much cajoling in this matter. He’s intrigued by Yibo’s progress, so he starts going with the boys as early as sunrise sometimes. He dutifully practices with a bow, polishes his own pretty mediocre sword fighting skills, and then watches as Yibo and Seungyoun make each other eat dirt in turns.
But the princes don’t just train with each other or their teachers anymore. Xiao Zhan meets some of the other students, sons and daughters of lords and peasants alike that come here to learn and work hard.
There’s lady Chang Xiao, who often gets paired up with Yibo. After some grumbling the boy admits she’s still better at that move that disarmed him two years ago. Cheng Xiao is lovely and has formidable skills. Even at twelve, she’s the bendiest person Xiao Zhan has ever seen.
Yang Kai is the one with the most stamina, though. He can wield all kinds of swords, from light ones to heavy sabres. He’s versatile and can adjust to basically any opponent. He’s older than Xiao Zhan and has been in actual battles. He comes here to not only learn more, but also instruct the younger ones. He seems to Xiao Zhan a bit scary at first, but turns our to be polite and humble, in awe of the royals, just the tiniest bit. He definitely has a soft spot for Yibo.
Momo Koyama is a sweet girl from another kingdom. She’s innovative, often comes up with ways to make moves better or more efficient. Within ten minutes of meeting Xiao Zhan she somehow produces peaches out of nowhere and offers them to him. Next time Xiao Zhan brings her pears to say thank you, and they end up in some sort of friendly rivalry that consists of trying to one-up each other with gifted food.
She’s not the only foreigner here. Huang Xiao and Qiao Zhi have come from the He Xing Wu Qi Kingdom for the peony festival, but go to the training field every day nonetheless. They are a unique pair. Huang Xiao is a slender, graceful, poetry in every move kind of fighter. Qiao Zhi, in contrast, is of a powerful, forceful kind. They are brilliant in their own styles, but when they combine their skills and fight together, in two-on-two or even two-on-three battles, that’s when they become magical. Somehow they complement, not contradict each other, and the picture they make is nothing short of breathtaking. Xiao Zhan feels like he’s watching an art performance every time he sees them in action.
Yibo tells him Prince Yixing actually sent a letter that said he would start a war if anyone here tried to seduce the pair into permanently staying in Luoyang. The boy seems only half-sure the letter is written in a joking manner. Prince Yixing has nothing to fear though: Huang Xiao and Qiao Zhi enjoy the time here and get along with everyone, however they are not shy about their appreciation of the He Xing Wu Qi kingdom and especially the superiority of its tea.
Huang Xiao actually joins Xiao Zhan and Sungjoo’s regular meetings in the music room. He seems to be as appreciative of it as he is of combat. They play and sing together, share with each other melodies of the three kingdoms they are from.
Xiao Zhan has always seen the world through an artist’s eye. He appreciates the colours and the shapes of things that surround him, can feel their depth, beauty and meaning, can find inspiration, in both nature and people. He glimpses something similar in Huang Xiao. Only he himself most often translates all this into drawing, among other things, while Huang Xiao puts all his artistic vision into movement, expresses it with his body.
They get each other on a very specific level. So when Xiao Zhan presents him with a drawing of him and Qiao Zhi in one of their dual-fighting stances, Huang Xiao accepts it gratefully, even a bit reverently.
Still, the one Xiao Zhan gets along with best is Xiao Ji. He’s truly one a kind. He’s the most original fighter here. He comes up with moves no one sees coming and uses his surroundings in increasingly clever ways. Everyone agrees that, were there a sudden fight in a market, or a tavern brawl, Xiao Ji would be an undisputed champion.
His sense of humour matches Xiao Zhan’s surprisingly well. When Xiao Zhan gets tired, unable to even lift his arms, and everyone goes on and on and on — how do they do that? Xiao Zhan is no stranger to hard work but their drive to master the sword is almost inhuman — it’s Xiao Ji that comes to sit with him for a breather. They talk and laugh and make fun of each other. Once they even sneak out to drink wine late in the evening, get caught by Sungjoo and have to bribe him with alcohol. All three of them end up at the archery field, Xiao Zhan and Sungjoo trying to drunkenly make Ji-ge less hopeless with a bow. Miraculously, no one gets hurt.
(Except for Xiao Zhan’s head next morning, when Yibo pounds on his door with the usual loud Zhan-ge).
There are more people, of course, but these are the ones Xiao Zhan comes in contact with the most and considers at the very least good acquaintances. What fascinates him the most however is the way they all are with Yibo.
Most of the trainees here are older than the twins, some are even older than Xiao Zhan. It doesn’t show in how they act with the princes. After a few days Xiao Zhan can tell it’s not only because of the boys’ royal status. There’s a real respect there. These people share a passion for sword fighting, they sweat and learn together, work toward common goal. It reminds Xiao Zhan of how it is back home with him, Ayunga and Yunlong, only for them it’s all about archery.
Seungyoun and Wenhan are extremely outgoing by nature, they are just as talkative and buoyant here as they are when it’s just the princes. Yibo is outgoing too, just in a less obvious way. It’s not shyness, they’ve all been working together for long enough that Xiao Zhan can see no trace of it. Yibo laughs and talks and plays with other trainees, but there’s this seriousness to him. He wants these people to respect him, to recognise his abilities. More than anything, it seems to Xiao Zhan, he wants to be good at what he does.
Whatever the physician says, I’m gonna be the exception if I have to. I will be a warrior. I will master sword fighting. You just have to wait and see. I will do it.
This seriousness that never fully leaves the boy on the training field is all the more evident in its absence outside of it. With his Zhan-ge this and Zhan-ge that, his need to be in constant motion, and a frankly staggering amount of talking he does — “oh, our Bobo has always been like this, he he was just shy around Zhan-ge the last two times,” Wenhan helpfully supplies, — Yibo reminds him of an overeager puppy.
It’s not bad or anything, but Xiao Zhan does appreciate quiet pockets of time he gets sometimes. It takes a few weeks to realise they always fall on Sundays. Once he notices, he gets curious enough to actually ask Yibo about it.
“I go to a weekly check-up with the physician on Sundays,” the boy explains. “And then I have my Tian Tian Xiang Shang meetings, they usually take a while.”
“Sorry, your what now?”
“Tian Tian Xiang Shang,” Yibo smiles, small and soft. “It’s something Han-ge came up with when I was sick.”
Yibo doesn’t really talk about that time, so Xiao Zhan listens with rapt attention.
“It was hard for a while, when I still couldn’t get out of bed. One day Han-ge showed up with Da-laoshi and Feng-ge in tow and started talking about things that were happening in the kingdom. They brought reports on farming, food supplies, various celebrations in nearby towns and villages, stuff like that.”
He pauses, looks at Xiao Zhan, averts his gaze and then looks again, “They were trying to keep me busy, of course. But I also think. No one, aside from Seungyoun maybe, believed I would get back into training or even wanted me to, they thought it was too dangerous. I guess this was Han-ge’s attempt to show me I could have a place in the Council, if it came to that.”
Having seen Yibo in action, it’s difficult to imagine everyone doubting this boy’s path. Then again, didn’t Xiao Zhan himself come here half-expecting to see a sickly boy?
“It all worked out in the end, I got better. I didn’t want to be in the Council, but I liked these meetings, I guess Han-ge, Da-laoshi and Feng-ge did too, so we continued doing this, have been for years now. Sometimes my brothers or other people join us, to listen or share something. It’s mostly cultural stuff, not political. We look at things happening in the kingdom and try to find ways to make them better, to make progress, to move upwards. You know, ‘tian tian xiang shang’. I don’t remember who actually came up with the name, it was probably Da-laoshi.”
Yibo snorts, “Although sometimes we just eat food from different towns and argue which restaurant owners we should invite to set up stalls for the peony festival.”
Xiao Zhan laughs in answer, but inwardly reels a little. What these council members did and continue doing for the little prince is amazing. And the fact that Yibo himself is involved in something quite far from his usual interests is… Well, Wang Yibo is full of surprises, that’s for sure.
“It sounds cool, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan says, and means it. There’s a hint of that damn softness in his voice again.
The boy lights up at the praise, “Really? You can come with me next time if you want!”
Oh. No, that’s… That’d be weird. Xiao Zhan wasn’t even there when Yibo was recovering, when Wang Han and the others did what they could to help the little prince. This Tian Tian Xiang Shang obviously means a lot to him. It’s not Xiao Zhan’s place to trespass something so personal and meaningful.
Also, he really does enjoy a little peace and quiet while Yibo is busy. But it’s mostly the trespassing thing, he swears.
“No, I wouldn’t want to intrude—”
“You wouldn’t be intruding—”
“Yes I would, this is your thing.” If Yibo thinks he can out-stubborn him, he’s going to be disappointed. “Besides, I’m a foreign prince, I probably shouldn’t know too much about the inner workings of your kingdom. What if I gather information and use it to conquer Luoyang?”
Yibo snorts and rolls his eyes, which is exactly what Xiao Zhan aimed for.
“You’re not funny, Zhan-ge.”
“Who are you to say whether I’m funny or not, brat?!”
They bicker for a while, until Yibo gets serious again and says, “You can come to Tian Tian Xiang Shang anytime you want, Zhan-ge. Maybe later, sometime in the future?”
For some reason it seems important to him that Xiao Zhan says yes.
“Okay, sometime in the future, let’s do this.”
Yibo smiles, satisfied.
Xiao Zhan truly would feel like an intruder if he joined them now. But maybe, he thinks, it won’t always be like this.
***
Sundays aren’t the only quiet time he gets.
Summer in Luoyang is not as hot and humid as it is in Chongqing, so being outside for substantial amount of time can actually be quite pleasant. The royal gardens offer a nice view and very convenient low stone tables with small benches around them.
A few days into this visit, Xiao Zhan grabs some ink, paper and a brush, and prepares himself for a nice afternoon.
However when he gets to one of those tables by the pond, he finds Yibo sitting on a bench.
“Zhan-ge?”
“Hey,” he greets, trying to make out what the boy has in his hands, “what are you doing?”
“Nothing much, just a bit of wood carving,” Yibo holds up a piece of wood he’s working on.
Xiao Zhan comes closer, carefully sets his own supplies on the table and takes the piece.
It’s half-finished, but the shape of a horse is pretty clear, its head mostly done. Xiao Zhan is kind of impressed. The steadiness of the hand and the attention to detail are evident in every curve.
“You made this?” The question is redundant, since Yibo’s still holding a small knife and has wood shavings scattered on the ground around him. “I mean, this is good, Yibo.”
“Thanks,” the boy nods, taking the figurine back. “Someone from a nearby village showed us how to properly make these things a few years ago. You should’ve seen us back then,” he laughs, “we were trying to outdo each other so badly.”
Xiao Zhan can easily imagine it. The princes are competitive to a fault. Some more than others, but it seems to be a family trait.
“Huh, I haven’t seen anyone else doing this.”
“Yeah, the craze eventually passed. But it stuck with me,” Yibo’s face lights up and he starts talking very fast. “You see, it’s kind of like solving a puzzle, but more intricate and involved. You have to think carefully about each part, what you want it to be, how to connect it to the rest of the body seamlessly, so you can get a single figurine, not just a randomly cut piece of wood.”
“Must take a lot of concentration.”
“It gets easier with practice. I like it, in any case,” the boy shrugs.
Yet another surprise from him. Xiao Zhan wouldn’t have thought someone who enjoys movement and the company of other people — which Yibo does, he’s noticed the boy is hardly ever alone — could sit for hours with nothing but a knife and a piece of wood to entertain him. Maybe even he needs some time to recharge.
“Well, I’m no expert, but I think you’re really good at it. That lion is shaping up to be very life-like,” he says and tries not to cackle at the indignation on Yibo’s face.
“It’s a horse!”
“Are you sure?” he makes a show of squinting at the figurine. “Hm. A horse? Maybe you aren’t that good after all.”
Yibo frowns at his unfinished carving, then at Xiao Zhan, “Zhan-ge, you’re just fucking with me, aren’t you?”
Xiao Zhan gasps, “Your highness! Such words are unfit for a prince! I am shocked and appalled—”
The boy looks ready to outright slap him, so Xiao Zhan raises his hands in surrender and laughs, “Alright, alright, it’s a horse, you’ve convinced me! I’m convinced!”
“You better be,” Yibo grumbles, obviously trying not to smile himself.
Then his eyes snag on Xiao Zhan’s supplies.
“Did you come here to paint?” he asks.
“Yeah, but it’s fine, I’ll find another spot, I don’t want to interrupt you more than I already have.”
“I’m fine with you staying,” Yibo sounds sincere, like he actually doesn’t mind and not just saying it for the sake of politeness.
From what Xiao Zhan has seen, the boy is honest and direct, maybe even a shade too much. So Xiao Zhan lowers himself on the bench, arranges everything to his liking and starts painting.
Yibo watches him like a hawk for a few minutes, so, to alleviate the pressure of having an audience, he talks a bit about what he’s doing, tells the boy how he started taking serious lessons again during these two years, what he’s learned and hopes yet to accomplish.
After a while the prince gets back to his own project, and they mostly work in silence.
It’s nice.
After a few hours Xiao Zhan realises there’s no more sound of a knife against wood, hasn’t been in a while. He looks up to find Yibo looking at him. The boy doesn’t seem embarrassed at being caught, doesn’t even blink.
“Are you done?” Xiao Zhan asks. “You should’ve said something.”
Yibo just shrugs and still refuses look away.
“Ah, well. I’m almost finished as well.”
“I don’t mind waiting.”
Xiao Zhan goes back to his last drawing, slightly unnerved by Yibo focused entirely on him.
What’s so interesting about watching someone paint anyway?
He huffs and decides to just ignore it. There’s really very little left to do, just a few strokes here and there.
“Alright, that’s about it,” he declares soon.
“Can I see?”
“Only if you show me yours.”
“Deal.”
Xiao Zhan gets up and takes the little figurine Yibo’s been working on. The horse is galloping, its mane and tail trailing as if captured by the wind, four legs frozen in motion. The minute details are somewhat unclear, but all in all it’s done amazingly well, especially for a thirteen-year-old. He turns to Yibo, ready to praise him, but stops once he sees the expression on the boy’s face.
Yibo is studying his second painting. It’s an elaborate one, with mountains and two rivers merging into one, a few boats with fishermen here and there. It would’ve been a pretty standard landscape, except it’s actually a view of Chongqing, the one Xiao Zhan knows by heart. He tried to transfer some of that familiarity, that feeling onto paper.
Judging by Yibo’s reaction, he has succeeded. The prince traces the edges of the painting, his touch feather-light, almost reverent. Yes, that’s the word, Yibo looks reverent.
“Gege,” he says very quietly. “it’s your kingdom, isn’t it?”
“Yeah,” Xiao Zhan nods, even though Yibo is still intently studying the painting and can’t see him.
“You must love it very much.”
And that’s. Maybe Xiao Zhan was a little too successful in putting his emotions into this work, if Yibo, untrained in this kind of art, was able to recognise the place and the feeling behind the picture so easily.
“I do, yes.”
The prince finally looks up, eyes wide and sincere, “It’s beautiful, Zhan-ge.”
“Thank you,” he smiles and gestures at the other end of the table. “I’m afraid the first one is much simpler.”
Yibo notices his first drawing — more of a doodle really — and his cheeks do that thing where they bunch up and make Xiao Zhan want to poke them.
“Is that?..”
“Yes,” his own smile grows wider, “that’s Jianguo. It’s the first time I’ve been away from her, I guess I’ve been missing her.”
“Her legs are so short!” Yibo takes the little drawing into his hands. “I love this. She’s so cute!”
“She really is, you have no idea. Spoiled, too. She keeps demanding pets from me whenever she wants and gets really offended if I’m too busy. I have to bribe her with treats to win her affection back,” he’s gushing, but he can’t help himself. He loves Jianguo in all her bratty glory.
Yibo doesn’t seem to mind anyway. He laughs and lightly strokes along the cat’s back.
He looks fond, so on a whim, Xiao Zhan offers, “You can keep this if you want to.”
“For real? Don’t you want to keep it close if you miss her?”
“It’s just a doodle, I can always make more.”
Yibo looks at the paper in his hands, then at Xiao Zhan as if to make sure it’s really okay.
“Alright. Thank you, Zhan-ge!”
He clutches the drawing, smiling wide.
It’s a nice feeling, to be able to make someone so genuinely happy with such small a thing.
He takes his supplies, ready to move on, but pauses when Yibo sighs and kneels, starts to gather wood shavings strewn all around the little bench he’s been sitting on.
Xiao Zhan is pleasantly surprised by the boy’s tidiness. He kneels nearby and together they make neat piles that would be easy to get rid of later. Only then does Yibo remember his own creation.
“Hey, you never told me what you think of my horse,” he says.
“I think you might’ve been right.”
“About what?”
“It is a horse.”
“Zhan-ge!” Yibo throws a fistful of shavings at him.
He laughs. “Wow, an offence against a foreign prince! Now I’ll have to get Na-jie involved—”
“Tell me what you think about my horse!”
“Wang Yibo,” he almost whines, “what’s with the sudden need to be praised? Do you have no shame?”
“Tell me!”
Ugh, the boy’s stubbornness is annoying. Xiao Zhan can barely keep from smiling because he is annoyed, okay?
“Fine! His royal highness is skilled beyond his age. I can only dream of being so talented. I would gladly take home a collection of figurines made by him.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” the smug brat actually smirks.
Xiao Zhan shakes his head. Unbelievable.
When they are done he adds as casually as he can, “Bo-di.”
“Mn?”
“I think the horse is really well-made. You are imaginative, precise and have a lot of patience. I like it.”
Yibo looks up, studies his face and, evidently, finds something he likes too.
“Thank you, Zhan-ge,” he says, ears red.
With the blush and the squishy cheeks, Xiao Zhan can’t tell who’s more adorable: the boy or the cat on the drawing he’s still clutching to his chest.
***
Between sword fighting, archery, music sessions, a few more woodcarving and painting encounters with Yibo, and just general horsing around with the princes and some of his new friends, two months fly by. This is the most fun Xiao Zhan has had in Luoyang, and on the last morning here he is sorry to go.
He’s already said all official and unofficial goodbyes, so now there are only the princes left, having insisted on waking up at dawn to see him off.
“Xiao Zhan,” Wenhan whines, “it’s not fair we don’t get to see you next time.”
Yixuan interjects, “Behave. He was only here this year because of the festival,” he throws Xiao Zhan a knowing glance, as if he has guessed the real reason. He may have. “It’s only right that next time Yibo finally goes to Chongqing.”
“You can always just visit me,” Xiao Zhan says, just to stir shit up.
“Ooohhhh, can we?” Seungyoun jumps up in excitement but then pauses, “Han-ge probably wouldn’t let us though. Maybe, like, Sungjoo, because he can pretend to be all grown up and responsible…”
“But Sungjoo wouldn’t just leave us here, come on, ” Wenhan interrupts.
“What are you talking about, I definitely would!”
In the ensuring chaos, Yibo quietly steps closer to Xiao Zhan and hands him something.
“Here, I made this for you.”
It’s a little wooden Jianguo, almost exactly the same as the one in Xiao Zhan’s drawing: she is curled up, her head raised, eyes wide-open. Every detail is painstakingly neat. It must’ve taken Yibo a lot of time to make this. Maybe even a few tries.
“That way you can always take her with you wherever you go. So you don’t have to miss her too much.”
Xiao Zhan doesn’t know what to say. This is way too nice and unexpected. Yibo is starting to get self-conscious however, so he gets a hold on himself.
“Thank you, Bo-di. I love it.”
It seems to do the trick. Yibo relaxes, bounces on his feet a few times, and says, “Cool. Well, I guess I’ll see you next time.”
“Yeah,” Xiao Zhan swipes a finger over wooden Jianguo’s head, “see you next time.”
5
Next time, two years later, finds Xiao Zhan in an unfamiliar role of a host. He’s waiting by the gates, in his formal garments, surrounded by royal guards and curious onlookers.
The whole palace, the whole town even, is in uproar about a foreign prince coming to stay in Chongqing for two months. Not just some prince either but the one set to marry one of their own. Palace stuff has been gossiping for weeks now. Is he handsome? Is he charming? Does he have a good temperament?
It’s ridiculous, Xiao Zhan wants to tell them. It’s just Yibo. A stubborn, wilful, annoying, slightly shy and kind of adorable child. What is all the fuss about?
At least his parents are being sensible, waiting for Yibo to come and officially greet them in the main hall.
His friends are less sensible. They are assholes, that’s what they are. Okay, Lulu is by his side as the older sibling of the royal family, it’s her right and responsibility to be here.
Ji Li and Yu Bin, on the are hand, are just curious about Zhanzhan’s fiancé and couldn’t wait until the official banquet to meet the Luoyang guest. Zhuocheng has probably been dragged here against his will, judging by the imploring looks he keeps throwing in Xiao Zhan’s direction.
They’ve all been instructed by Xiao Zhan to never even mention the engagement lest they ruin the equilibrium he has been working on for years. It’s a coin toss whether they will actually listen.
Xiao Zhan glances at Na-jie. She’d been there with him every step of the way, she knows there’s nothing to fuss about.
Really, it’s just Yibo.
When the delegation from Luoyang finally arrives and the prince steps out of the carriage, the sight that greets Xiao Zhan is different from what he expected.
It’s still Yibo, of course. He’s just… grown up to some degree, Xiao Zhan guesses. As always, he’s very thin, but now he’s also long, which makes him look like a noodle. His face is still squishy, but, Xiao Zhan notes with disappointment, to a much lesser degree.
He’s not exactly grown up yet, but neither can Xiao Zhan call him a child anymore.
The most unsettling thing is the expression Yibo’s wearing. It’s been a while since he’s seen the prince in an unfamiliar setting, maybe that’s why the stony face is bothering him so much.
Then again, the last time Yibo was truly uncomfortable in his presence was six years ago, and the boy was more shy than cold as he is now. This is new and weird, especially considering he spent Xiao Zhan’s last visit being as eager and enthusiastic as a puppy.
Na-jie and Han-ge exchange formal greetings, which they are old hats at by now. Yibo continues to just stand there looking all stoic. Xiao Zhan continues being bothered by it. Maybe the prince has developed a new defence mechanism for facing new people and uncomfortable situations. Or maybe he is genuinely like that now - cold, silent, with no expression on his face.
The urge to find out which of these is true gets stronger and stronger until Xiao Zhan can’t help himself anymore. It’s his turn to speak anyway.
“Wang Han-laoshi, welcome! It is my honour to host you here in Chongqing,” he says and bows deeply.
He’s glad the man has chosen to come himself instead of sending someone else. Though that’s not surprising, really, given Wang Han’s fondness for this particular charge of his. Xiao Zhan wonders if they still have those Tian Tian Xiang Shang meetings.
Okay, showtime.
He turns to Yibo and bows again.
“Your highness,” Xiao Zhan says in his most polite tone of voice, “I welcome you to our humble kingdom. Surely you are used to a much more lavish setting, but, hopefully, we can meet at least some of your expectations.”
He side-eyes his friends. Well, no one asked them to come, they’ll just have to bear it.
“Moreover, I beg your forgiveness for how humble this greeting party is. It is known you prefer to keep company with those of the highest status,” Yibo’s brothers are princes, so technically that’s not even a complete lie, “yet I dare hope my sister and I will not disappoint you too greatly.”
Xiao Zhan finally straightens from his bow. Out of the corner of his eye he can see Na-jie rubbing her temples. He’s sure to get an earful later. Wang Han is shaking his head, but he’s obviously amused too.
None of that is as important as Yibo’s face at this moment. He looks horrified. Also like he wants to hit Xiao Zhan really badly.
“Zhan-ge!”
Aha! There he is.
Yibo turns to where Ji Li, Yu Bin and Zhuocheng are standing. Hilariously, they seem uncomfortable, like they might actually think Yibo is some kind of spoiled stuck-up princeling. Maybe Xiao Zhan overdid it, just a tiny bit?
“Please don’t listen to him,” Yibo does a bow of his own. “I’m excited to be in Chongqing and learn about its culture.”
This is where Lulu finally puts her foot down.
“I’m sure you are,” she says. “Please forgive my brother, he’s usually much more polite.”
She throws him a glare.
“Okay, okay, I’m sorry! Obviously I’m kidding, there’s no need to fuss.”
He turns to Yibo. The prince looks much more like himself now. It’s a relief.
“Hi, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan says and smiles at him, making sure his eyes do their crinkle thing. It usually mollifies people.
Very quietly, so no one else can hear, Yibo grumbles, “Hi, asshole.“
It startles a delighted laugh out of Xiao Zhan.
This is going to be fun.
***
Over the course of the welcoming banquet Yibo alternates between being incredibly polite to everyone around, that expressionless face out for all to see, and bonding with Ji Li and Yu Bin about Xiao Zhan being a dick.
All in all, it’s a success.
After the banquet, Yibo demands to be shown to Xiao Zhan’s rooms. His own are not far, since he is technically Xiao Zhan’s guest, but Xiao Zhan still makes noises of indignation.
“Come on, I wanna meet Jianguo. It’s only fair, you know,” Yibo smirks, “since I am so capricious and arrogant.”
Xiao Zhan rolls his eyes.
When they get in, they find Jianguo right inside, ready to greet Xiao Zhan. She’s agreeable and affectionate up until she notices Yibo. Then she spooks and darts back.
“Don’t take it personally,” he says, “Jianguo is shy around strangers. She’s a slow warmer.”
Yibo sits down by the table, a stubborn look on his face. Jianguo stares at him from the opposite corner.
He stares back.
They seem to be having some sort of silent communication during which both of them barely even blink. It goes on for a while, to the point where Xiao Zhan begins to feel like an intruder in his own rooms.
Finally, Jianguo takes a tentative step forward. Then another, and another, until she’s in front of the prince.
Yibo silently offers a hand for her to sniff. After a brief moment of hesitation, she does it.
And then.
Then Jianguo puts her front paws on Yibo’s knee, her long body stretched towards him, and looks at him with big round eyes.
They make such a cute picture Xiao Zhan forgets his indignation and itches to do a painting of them.
Yibo stokes Jianguo’s back. His hands are oddly big, Xiao Zhan absently notes, as if the rest of his body hasn’t caught up yet.
Jianguo leans into it and then hops on Yibo’s lap.
At this the forgotten indignation comes back.
“Jianguo, what the hell?!” Xiao Zhan breaks the silent spell. “It took you days to get used to me in the beginning! What is this?”
“Ignore him, princess,” Yibo coos, now petting her with both hands. “You just have good taste, don’t you?”
Then he produces a cat treat from the folds of his hanfu and proceeds to feed it to Jianguo.
Xiao Zhan gapes, “Wang Yibo. Did you. Did you bring treats from Luoyang and keep them on you all through the welcoming banquet just to seduce my cat into liking you?”
The prince looks maddeningly smug.
“So what if I did? Zhan-ge, I’ve got a drawing of her hanging on the wall by my bed, how could I not want to win her over?”
He says it like it’s not a big deal. Like keeping Xiao Zhan’s little doodle and hanging it on the wall is nothing of importance, an afterthought. (Xiao Zhan does not admit to where he keeps that little figurine of Jianguo and just how fast he could get it. It’s his own business after all).
He finally goes to sit by the table too and glares at Jianguo in accusation.
“Are you happy with yourself, you cheater?”
She slow-blinks at him from Yibo’s lap and actually start purring. Yibo laughs, but even this croaking sound doesn’t make her move.
“You should be relieved it’s just me. Seungyoun and Wenhan would’ve tried to steal her from you too,” the prince says. “They begged Han-ge to let them come here. There was a whole campaign and everything. But in the end he decided it would cause too much ruckus.”
“Ah, too bad, it’d be good to see the brats,” Xiao Zhan smiles fondly and then side-eyes Yibo. “But at least you won’t miss them too much now that you have my cat.”
It’s actually something he has been kinda worried about. Sure, Yibo might not be thirteen and alone in an unfamiliar kingdom, but Xiao Zhan still remembers how much he missed Lulu that first time. Considering how close Yibo is with his brothers, it might prove hard for him to be away from them for so long.
However, Yibo being Yibo, he blows right past this topic and says something that Xiao Zhan doesn’t expect at all.
“Actually, if everything works out the way I planned, I won’t have much time to miss anyone.”
The boy straightens up and finally takes his eyes off Jianguo to look directly at Xiao Zhan.
“Zhan-ge, I have a favour to ask.”
***
“Unbelievable,” Xiao Zhan whines.
It’s very, very, very early in the morning and he’s already up and about, walking the city streets with an annoyingly eager Yibo by his side.
“This is why you are actually here, aren’t you?” he continues his very much justified complaining. “Even if we didn’t have a visit scheduled, even if it was my turn to go to Luoyang, you still would’ve asked to come to Chongqing this year because he’s here, wouldn’t you? Wang Yibo, do you have no shame? Using me like that…”
Yibo abruptly stops and grabs Xiao Zhan’s forearm.
“Zhan-ge, that’s not true,” his eyes are wide and pleading, “he’s not the reason I’m here. Well, no, of course he is, but not the only reason. I also came here for your cat.”
“Wang Yibo!” Xiao Zhan snarls at the boy.
Yibo lets him go, cackling.
They reach the manor soon after and are admitted with no qualms. Servants escort them to a big inner courtyard where half a dozen people already have swords out, going through the usual stances. A few are locked in combat. He guesses the one they came here for is somewhere in there.
Xiao Zhan has heard from Yu Bin of a travelling warrior that is currently visiting Chongqing. Evidently, he’s famous for being undefeated in battle, so there are a lot of people eager to learn from him. Xiao Zhan just didn’t expect Yibo to be one of them, although he probably should have.
“Zhan-ge, it’s him! It’s really him!”
The prince grabs his forearm again, but this time it seems to be an unconscious gesture.
“Ow, ow, stop, it hurts,” Xiao Zhan exclaims, because it does, he can feel Yibo’s fingers squeezing his very bones.
His pleading falls on deaf ears. The boy is staring, mouth slightly agape. Xiao Zhan could swear there are actual stars in his eyes.
Huh. This is new.
Someone finally notices them, and there’s a chain reaction, until everyone in the courtyard is bowing.
Xiao Zhan bows in return. “Greetings! There’s no need to stop on our account, we didn’t want to interrupt anyone. Please, continue what you were doing. We only ask to speak with Bouboo-laoshi, if it is possible.”
A man steps from the crowd. He’s very tall and thin, and while he’s walking towards them Xiao Zhan see easy grace in his movements.
When he comes up to them and bows, Yibo unfreezes.
“Oh my god, Bouboo-laoshi… I know you,” he says and does a series of moves that must mean something to Bouboo, because they make the man smile, “I really like you.”
“Thank you so much,” Bouboo seems to be a bit embarrassed and bows again.
“My name is Wang Yibo, I’ll be in Chongqing for a few months, I really ho-hope,” Yibo stammers, but ploughs on, “I hope to have a chance to learn from you. If you agree. I mean, of course you don’t have to. But I really, really like you… so. Um. Yeah.”
Xiao Zhan stares. If he had less composure, he’d probably gape.
He’s never seen Yibo like this with anyone. Not at nine, nor at eleven or thirteen. Now, at fifteen, from what Xiao Zhan has glimpsed, the boy seems self-assured, capable and cheeky, if a bit of a slow-warmer when it comes to strangers.
Yibo isn’t being self-assured or shy. He is looking at Bouboo with wide eyes, mouth stretched into awed smile. More than anything, he is dazed and ecstatic.
And continues to be so when he and Bouboo talk about training in detail.
It’s weird. During their last visit Yibo was like a clinging puppy, always making Xiao Zhan do something and go somewhere. His attention was on Xiao Zhan a lot. Last night the boy kept badgering him, demanding news of the last two years, sharing his own. Even when he was dissing Xiao Zhan with Ji Li, he kept glancing back, as if expecting to get a reaction.
It’s only now, when Yibo’s focus is not on him, that Xiao Zhan realises he kind of got used to being the centre of Yibo’s attention.
Something unfamiliar churns in his gut. Xiao Zhan isn’t sure he likes the feeling.
Then Bouboo brings him out of his reverie, “Your highness, would you like to join us?”
“Oh, no, no, thank you, I’m not much of a swordsman,” he awkwardly laughs. If Bouboo really is as good as everyone says, Xiao Zhan would like to not make a fool of himself on the first day, thank you very much. “I’m just here for company, I’ll cheer for you from here.”
“If you’re sure,” Bouboo shrugs. “Please let me know if you change your mind.”
“Okay, wish me luck, Zhan-ge,” Yibo whispers with a huge grin on his face as he turns to follow Bouboo.
Over the course of next few weeks, the weird feeling thankfully disappears. First it gives way to embarrassment on Yibo’s behalf. Honestly, he has no chill around his hero. The boy is too openhearted for his own good.
Then comes a strange mix of pride and fascination. Xiao Zhan sees how Yibo’s improved in these two years, gone from a talented child to a capable youth. He still works incredibly hard, tireless, daring, ever striving to become better. Every time the sword is knocked out of his hands, he picks it up with even more determination.
Xiao Zhan watches Bouboo as well. The man is everything he’s made out to be and more. The insane control of every muscle of his body, the ability to shift and transform his technique depending on the opponent, the awareness of his surroundings - all of it combined is almost enough to make Bouboo seem not entirely human. Normal bodies just don’t move that way, okay? Xiao Zhan is pretty sure of it.
The more he watches, the more he notices a similarity of sorts about the way Bouboo and Yibo move. Xiao Zhan can’t quite put a finger on what it is exactly, but it’s there in the sharpness of their attacks, the fluidity with which they turn and slide, maybe even their understanding of the weapon.
In any case, watching them in a fight — with other people and especially each other — is a revelation. Not exactly of an artistic kind, the way Huang Xiao and Qiao Zhi were, but a bit like watching a raging storm, or sunlight dancing on the water. A force of nature, a true, unrestrained beauty captured in the motion of their bodies.
Maybe it’s an artist in him speaking, but Xiao Zhan can hardly look away when those two really get going.
Fighting skills aside, Bouboo is also an excellent teacher. He’s kind and fair, delighting in his students’ success and patient with their failures. After a week he finally coaxes Xiao Zhan into giving it a try. Bouboo says that both he and Xiao Zhan are tall and on a thin side and explains how they can use these things to their advantage. Under his tutelage Xiao Zhan does make some progress. And while he’d choose his bow over a sword any day, the satisfaction of becoming better, more that he was before, is a feeling he greatly enjoys.
Still, most of the time he is content with being a spectator. He’s not there every day, of course, and he certainly doesn’t stay for the whole training session, but he’s there enough to see the shift in the way Yibo and Bouboo are with each other.
They start out as a famed warrior and his extremely ardent admirer (Xiao Zhan is tempted to paint some of Yibo’s most embarrassing freak-outs over Bouboo just so he could have unparalleled blackmail material), move on to being a teacher and an eager pupil, and end up as genuine friends.
Xiao Zhan is a little surprised at how fast Yibo makes it happen. Then he thinks of all those people back in Luoyang, how pampered Yibo is by his brothers, how the royal counsel has basically adopted him, how fond Yang Kai, Xiao Ji and the rest are of him. Thinks how Wang Han, one of the highest ranking people in Luoyang, has chosen to be the one to accompany the prince here instead of sending someone a little less important.
So no, Xiao Zhan shouldn’t be surprised at all. Wang Yibo has no trouble snatching people’s hearts and keeping them.
***
After a brief period of initial awkwardness, Yibo makes a short work of Xiao Zhan’s closest friends too.
He gets along with Ji Li like a house on fire. Xiao Zhan leaves them alone for two hours to attend his duties, and comes back to them playing weird games. They don’t seem to get tired of it too, can go on slapping each other’s hands for what seems to Xiao Zhan like hours. He himself gets bored with it pretty easily, which of course has nothing to do with him losing almost every game. Yibo just cheats at rock-paper-scissors, okay? Ji Li often gets decimated by Yibo too, but seems to derive perverse enjoyment from it, that weirdo.
Yu Bin, of course, shares Yibo’s interest in weapons, though maybe he’s not quite as fanatical about it. Still, they start with this common ground, and it’s Yu Bin who enlightens the boy about the palace dynamics and its unspoken rules. He and Ji Li become the ones Yibo spends most of his time with, outside of Bouboo, if Xiao Zhan is needed elsewhere.
He and Zhuocheng are perfectly polite with each other, until Zhuocheng unwittingly finds Xiao Zhan and Yibo in one of those moods, the ones where Yibo, being a little shit, drags a much more mature Xiao Zhan to his level. That’s Xiao Zhan’s take on it, and he’s gonna stand by it. In any case they see a purplish welt on Zhuocheng’s neck and milk it for all it’s worth until his whole face is red. They make so many obscene jokes that the next day they have to go to the market and get Zhoucheng’s favourite snacks in apology. After that, he sees that there’s no reason to be overly polite to Yibo, prince or not, and they get along just fine.
Wang Talu catches sight of Yibo coming back from practice one day, sore and tired, and takes him to get massages. Wang Han joins them, and they make it a weekly occurrence. Wang Talu has always been insanely outgoing, so Xiao Zhan isn’t surprised he’s managed to get along with their foreign guests.
Yibo bonds with Ziyi over food, of all things. Actually, Xiao Zhan had been looking forward to the food thing. Luoyang cuisine is much milder, so Yibo’s reaction to Chongqing’s most popular dishes was bound to be good. Xiao Zhan is even nice about it, the first time they eat together outside the welcoming banquet, warns the boy to use another sauce and prepare a bowl of plain rice. Yibo, stubborn to a fault, insists he’s fine eating the same food as Xiao Zhan. After a few bites, a lot of water and a decent amount tears, he changes his mind.
Xiao Zhan is very compassionate and doesn’t laugh at him, not even a little, no matter what Yibo says.
In any case, Ziyi finds out about this, and together with Xiao Zhan hops on a quest to domesticate Yibo’s palate into being able to handle spiciness. Ever astute, she presents it to the boy as a challenge, which he gladly accepts. Once, when Xiao Zhan is tied up with court matters, she takes Yibo and Bouboo to a famous restaurant, and the three of them brave authentic Chongqing style hotpot in July. Ziyi and Yibo come back sweaty, red, but excited to report Yibo’s success at mostly handling the spicy broth. They high-five each other and give Xiao Zhan identical grins.
(Turns out Bouboo, having been staying in Chongqing for a few months now, has learnt to eat almost as well as a native. He has no problem keeping up with Xiao Zhan himself, which makes Xiao Zhan’s already sizeable respect for the man reach a new level).
As for Ayunga and Yunlong, they take one look at Yibo and decide to adopt him.
“Zhanzhan, I know you two have a deal about not discussing it, but look at him, he’s gonna grow up so pretty, capable too, he’s a good match for you. We have to make sure he likes it here,” Ayunga explains with mirth.
They take the prince to a play, just the three of them, and Yibo comes back looking a little dazed.
“Are they… always like that?”
“Like what?” Xiao Zhan asks just to be an asshole.
When the boy only squirms, Xiao Zhan takes pity on him. “The word you are looking for is married, which, yeah, they’ve been for two years now. But even before that, they’ve known each other for a a while. I guess if you’ve been together this long, you are bound to just get each other on this weird level.”
“Married, hm?” Yibo says with wonder.
All this is alarmingly close to a topic Xiao Zhan has no wish to breach, so he makes sure to distract the boy with the promise of showing him another side of Ayunga and Yunlong.
They agree to a little archery show with no qualms, and Yibo is suitably impressed with Chongqing’s best and brightest.
“Zhan-ge is still the best,” he chirps when Xiao Zhan gets back to him after his own turn of shooting through a ring of fire.
“Wang Yibo! What is wrong with you? They do this professionally, they are the elite of this kingdom!”
“And I bow to them and their skill,” the boy says, and then smirks, “but Zhan-ge is still the best! And the most handsome.”
Xiao Zhan shakes his head, embarrassed and weirdly, absurdly pleased with the boy’s objectively wrong opinion. When did the brat start smirking so much anyway?
“Are you human?” is all he can mumble in reply.
Yibo only laughs.
***
With how easy Yibo endears Xiao Zhan’s friends to himself and makes his own, Xiao Zhan could swear the boy is some kind of a gege magnet.
It proves to be true when one day they are wandering through the shops in the city, searching for something to take back as gifts for Yibo’s brothers. Xiao Zhan loses sight of him for two minutes, but finds him already in a company of an unfamiliar man, deep in conversation about woodcarving.
The man turns out to be Liu Haikuan, the first son of a local lord. He seems tall and imposing with austere features, but is actually kind and gentle, lovely all around. Despite being roughly Xiao Zhan’s age, he gets along with Yibo amazingly well. They obsess about the finer details of woodcarving and actually produce a pretty sizeable model of the palace together. Xiao Zhan’s parents fall in love with it as soon as it’s presented to them.
It’s Haikuan who suggests kite flying one day. He’s a nice and rational man, so there is no way for him to know what he starts. In theory, it’s a fun and easy activity, if only the weather is suitable.
In practice, Zhuocheng pats Haikuan on the shoulder, and says, “It’s not your fault, man, they just get like this sometimes. Come on, Ji Li is over there, we can choose our kites somewhere quieter.”
Xiao Zhan doesn’t notice it, because Yibo is being very loud with his wrong opinions.
“I’m telling you, Zhan-ge, this one will fly better!” the boy shakes his preferred kite.
It is, of course, green. Xiao Zhan is pretty sure Yibo’s latched onto this one mainly because of its colour, which is in no way a basis for choosing anything. The boy is absurd in his loyalty to the things he likes.
“Well I’m telling you this one is better, and I’ve been doing this for longer than you’ve been alive!” He shakes his own kite in return, a beautiful red phoenix that is definitely, obviously the right choice here.
“It just means you’re old and your judgement is failing you!”
Brat!
Unthinkingly, Xiao Zhan reaches out and slaps his arm.
Yibo makes a surprised noise.
For a split second, Xiao Zhan feels unsure. Yibo is Yibo, but hitting foreign princes is generally frowned upon, diplomatically speaking.
Then the boy’s whole face lights up with the most wicked expression Xiao Zhan has ever seen.
Oh no.
In the future, Xiao Zhan will huff and puff and complain, but Yibo won’t let him forget who, between them, was the first to hit whom. Weirdly, he won’t ever expose Xiao Zhan to other people, which is at least something.
Right now, though, Xiao Zhan is blissfully unaware of the far-reaching consequences and only has to deal with the immediate ones that present themselves when Yibo proceeds to slap his shoulder, then arm, then chest, then arm again and then the other arm—
At this point, Xiao Zhan strategically chooses to remove himself from the situation. Except Yibo is a stubborn bull, so he gives chase, and they end up running around for a few minutes.
But it’s July in Chongqing, so Xiao Zhan stops soon, wipes the sweat off his forehead and adopts his whiniest tone of voice.
“Ayaa, Wang Yibo, it’s too hot for this. Aren’t you hot? Give me a break, okay?”
Yibo, fresh as a daisy, grins and makes a show of thinking about it. It’s really not fair: the boy isn’t used to this kind of weather, he should be wilting under the scorching summer sun. Instead, he has no trouble training all morning and accosting Xiao Zhan all afternoon. Brat.
“I’ll consider letting Zhan-ge go if he gives me his tea,” is what Yibo comes up with after all his hard thinking.
Xiao Zhan rolls his eyes and grumbles, “First you hit me, now you shamelessly want to rob me of my tea. Youth these days…”
Yibo just makes grabby hands at the flask Xiao Zhan always carries with him.
As he watches Yibo drink, Xiao Zhan carefully doesn’t let any smugness show on his face.
The tea thing is a scheme he’s pretty proud of.
When Yibo first started learning from Bouboo, Xiao Zhan got somewhat alarmed, seeing how hard the boy was pushing himself. Knowing better than to say anything to the prince, he went to Wang Han. The man assured him that Yibo’s heart condition was being managed, weekly visits to a physician arranged even here in Chongqing.
Still, Xiao Zhan went to the physician himself and found out there were certain herbs meant to strengthen the body and the heart in particular. After that, it was just a matter of creating the recipe and making Yibo drink this concoction on the regular.
Figuring the boy wouldn’t like all the fuss, Xiao Zhan chose a stealthy approach. He started taking a flask to every training session and drinking from it with half-exaggerated pleased noises.
It didn’t take long for Yibo to take the bait.
Now, the boy takes a few long gulps and grins, “How about you use your kite and I mine, and we see which one flies higher?”
“You’re on,” Xiao Zhan raises an eyebrow, “but prepare to lose and lose hard, Bo-di, because I’m the best.”
Yibo mulishly lifts his chin, accepting the challenge.
***
Xiao Zhan definitely doesn’t gloat, because that would be unbecoming for a prince.
“It’s totally fine, you know, not everyone can be an ace at this. I mean, I can but… Ow, stop hitting me, it’s not my fault you lost!”
Okay, maybe he gloats a little, but it’s hard to resists when Yibo has such cute sulking face. The boy really did put up a fight. He did not want to admit defeat, and Xiao Zhan is not one to give up or give in, so they were at it for hours, long after everyone else got bored and moved on. But sooner of later, in this case later, even Yibo was forced to bow down to Xiao Zhan’s superior skills.
His sulking doesn’t last however, because in the time they were trying to outstubborn each other, Yu Bin managed to organise an impromptu party, complete with cheap wine smuggled from a sort of tavern lords and princes aren’t usually allowed to visit.
Xiao Zhan cuts himself off pretty early because he knows his limits, but also because he feels that, as a responsible adult, he needs to watch out for little Wang Yibo getting his drink on. The boy seems fine, doing weird shit with Ji Li, getting in an impromptu armwrestling match with Yu Bin, his croaking laughter reaching Xiao Zhan even in another corner of the room.
The suspicious thing is, Xiao Zhan is pretty sure the boy is on his second jug but barely even looks tipsy. He squints at Yibo, trying to find signs of intoxication, but there isn’t even a blush.
Just what do they do in Luoyang if Yibo can drink like that at fifteen.
“Wang Yibo. I have questions for your brothers,” he says, disgruntled.
The boy smirks, “You shouldn’t ask them, you wouldn’t be able to handle drinking with my brothers.” He grabs another jug and tugs Xiao Zhan. “Come on, the stars are out already, you’ve been promising to show me a supposedly unparalleled view of Chongqing.”
Chongqing is a mountain kingdom, so at the right time the view from palace rooftops is truly stunning and, more importantly here, completely different from what Yibo is used to in Luoyang.
They make the climb now, and Xiao Zhan must be tipsier than he’d thought, because he stumbles and doesn’t fall down the slope of the roof only because Yibo manages to grab him in time.
“What the hell, Zhan-ge, you drank three cups at most.”
“Why do you even know how much I drank,” Xiao Zhan grumbles, lowering himself into a sitting position. The tiles are kind of hard, but it’s manageable.
Of course, Yibo ignores his comment and gleefully cackles, “Oh my god, you’re a lightweight, aren’t you? Who would’ve thought.”
He sits down next to Xiao Zhan, making it very easy to reach out and slap him. Honestly, it’s a blessing to be able to do it now without restrain, because he is just so annoying.
Then again, Yibo isn’t shy about hitting him back, but Xiao Zhan supposes it’s a necessary evil that he can put up with.
“Whatever, not all of us can guzzle this stuff like water,” he side-eyes Yibo. “Although you should see the way Lulu drinks. Pretty sure she could outdo you.”
The boy makes some doubtful noises, but it’s okay, he hasn’t seen a lot of Lulu. She’s been especially busy with her duties these past few weeks, mostly crossing paths with Yibo during meals. It’s weird, because Xiao Zhan’s summer has been full to the brim with Yibo, yet his sister still has only a passing acquaintance with the boy.
Xiao Zhan glances at him, and this close finally sees signs of intoxication. It’s in the disheveled state of his hair, a barely visible pink tint to his cheeks, slight slouching of his shoulders. Still, he’s remarkably put together for the amount of alcohol he’s imbibed.
“You were right, it is amazing here,” Yibo says, making Xiao Zhan shift his gaze to what’s surrounding them.
It’s a nice night. Downhill there are the lights of the city, lanterns and torches all coming together to paint a bright and alive picture of Chongqing in all its vivid glory.
The sky above it all is clear and dark, the moon proudly showing its face among what seems like millions of stars.
“Do you miss home?” Xiao Zhan asks.
Yibo seems to enjoy his time in Chongqing, but it doesn’t mean he can’t be lonely or homesick. It’s been on Xiao Zhan’s mind for a while, and now is as good a time as any to ask him.
“Sometimes,” Yibo replies honestly. “I’ve never been away from my brothers for so long. A few times I turned to say something to Seungyoun, only to realise he wasn’t there. It’s dumb.”
It makes Xiao Zhan smile. Yibo and Seungyoun are called twins for a reason. “It’s not dumb, it’s normal for you to miss him this much, you’ve been inseparable your whole lives.”
“I guess. But it’s fine, really, I like it here. I’m glad I came,” Yibo says with a smile of his own, sweet and a little shy.
“Okay, good.”
That’s settled then.
They sit in companionable silence and trade sips from Yibo’s jug of wine every once in a while.
It’s nice.
“What’s this?” Yibo asks after a long silent spell.
“What’s what?”
“The song you’ve been humming.”
He thinks back on the last couple of minutes. Maybe not such a silent spell after all.
“I didn’t even notice, sorry.”
Yibo is obviously amused, “Zhan-ge, anyone who’s spent any amount of time in your presence knows you are ready to burst into song at any given moment.”
Xiao Zhan giggles. It’s not funny, but he’s buzzed, it feels good, so why exactly can’t he?
“It’s Stephanie Sun, have you heard of her?”
Yibo shakes his head.
“It’s a shame, she’s brilliant. She came to Chongqing once, and her music was just… I don’t know, it stayed with me. Many local musicians have been playing her songs ever since.” Something occurs to him, and he giggles again, this time even harder. “If she came here now, I’d probably be just as bad as you were with Bouboo those first few days.”
“I wasn’t that bad,” Yibo mutters and takes another swig from the jug.
“Bo-di, I hate to tell you this,” he absolutely loves it, “but it was the most hilarious thing I’ve witnessed in my whole life.”
“Whatever, I got him to like me, didn’t I.”
His tone is so petulant, eyebrows so adorably furrowed, that Xiao Zhan can’t resist petting his bunched up cheeks, “Yeah you did.”
Scandalised, the boy swats him away. He looks disgruntled, like a cat. Although with these huge hands of his, maybe more of half-grown lion or—
“Such a fucking lightweight,” Yibo interrupts his musings and gets the conversation back on track. “So what’s the song called?”
“Kepler,” Xiao Zhan feels his mouth stretch into a smile, less amusement and more pure fondness at the name.
“Will you sing it to me?” Yibo is serious now, as if he’s asking for something difficult, as if he’s ready for a refusal.
Xiao Zhan shrugs, looks up at the night sky.
He sings.
He sings about cold galaxies and dazzling radiance of lonely stars.
When it’s done, Xiao Zhan tears his eyes away from the sky and finds Yibo already looking at him. He’s got a strangely unreadable expression on.
“What?”
“Nothing,” the boy doesn’t turn away and barely even blinks. “It’s a beautiful song. Kind of sad though.”
“I find it soothing. No matter how lonely the star is, it’s bright and unique, special to someone. By the end, it’s not even lonely anymore. It’s found and obviously loved, even if it’s not stated outright. Something to be hopeful about, isn’t it?”
“Mn.”
Yibo looks lost in thought even after a few moments, like he’s seriously mulling over these words.
His head remains turned towards Xiao Zhan for the rest of the evening.
***
A few days later Xiao Zhan sincerely regrets ever opening his mouth and complaining to Lulu about stupid fifteen-year-olds who have no hangover to speak of even when they drink a truly unreasonable amount of alcohol.
That made her decide it was finally time for her to get to know Yibo better, seeing how busy she’s been and all.
Except now it doesn’t feel like they are getting to know each other, it feels kind of like a silent battle of wills. They are sitting on the opposite sides of the table, Xiao Zhan between them. Yibo has his expressionless face on, which probably means he’s nervous or unsure, but it doesn’t make sense because it’s just Lulu, what is there to be nervous about? Lulu herself is softly smiling, but Xiao Zhan knows her calculating, measuring gaze too well to fall for it, which, again, makes zero sense since it’s just Yibo.
All in all, it seems that everyone in the room is acutely aware of the reason Yibo is in Chongqing and what he technically is to Xiao Zhan.
Xiao Zhan doesn’t like this at all and longingly gazes at a bottle of expensive wine on the table. Maybe it would make things less tense—
“Yibo, let me pour you some wine. I hear you’re quite a drinker,” as if reading Xiao Zhan’s thoughts, Lulu finally breaks the silence.
He wants to throw her a pointed glare, but at the same time has to stifle a giggle.
Yibo doesn’t flinch at the probing comment and says calmly, “I’m really not, I just can handle my liquor, unlike some people.” Lulu laughs like a traitor she is. “I should be the one pouring though, I apologise for not offering earlier.”
He does just that, and he and Lulu knock back their cups with no problem. Xiao Zhan drinks his and tries to not make a face.
“So, if you are not a drinker, what are you? I’m afraid my duties have gotten to be a bit much lately, but I would really like to get to know you better. Please indulge me now, tell me about yourself,” Lulu’s tone is sweet, but she’s definitely not asking.
“I’ve got four brothers, hope to become a worthy fighter some day, and I love animals.”
Wow. Trust Wang Yibo to condense a whole person into one sentence. Xiao Zhan would like to say a lot more, but Lulu is ahead of him.
“Four brothers. You’re the youngest, correct?” she asks like she doesn’t have an extensive knowledge of royal families of at least half a dozen kingdoms. “You must be the baby of the family.”
“They would certainly like to think so,” Yibo replies calmly, “but I am no stranger to responsibility and I can handle myself just fine.”
Lulu smiles again, this time more genuine, and gestures at the bottle. Yibo pours again. Xiao Zhan feels the effect of this one instantly. This expensive stuff is much stronger than what they’d been drinking the other day.
“That’s nice to hear. But sometimes you aren’t responsible only for yourself. You say you want to become a warrior. What if something happens to you? That would affect your family and anyone close to you,” Lulu says, her eyes boring into the prince.
Okay, what? Why is this happening? Why did no one ask Xiao Zhan’s permission to have this conversation?
“Jiejie, come on, is this necessary?” he interrupts.
Lulu hushes him without taking her eyes off Yibo.
At the same time Yibo half-turns to him and says, “It’s fine, Zhan-ge.”
Then he focuses entirely on Lulu.
“Of course you have a point,” he concedes, remarkably even. “Then again, this could be said just about anything. Since I am a prince, assassination attempts are always a possibility. If I go into politics, I risk getting into petty palace intrigues. A war with another kingdom could break out for any number of reasons. I could even be attacked by bandits on my way to or from Chongqing. And so on. I believe caution is a virtue, but living in constant fear of danger is no living at all. Fighting is what I want to do, what I’m good at. It would allow me to do something meaningful, for myself, for the kingdom. I hope my family and anyone I’m close to would understand this and support me.”
Silence. Lulu tilts her head, looks Yibo up and down. If she hopes to find any cracks, there are none. The boy is being very serious. Serious, direct and honest.
She seems to come to the same conclusion, because she nods approvingly. “Good answer.”
Oh, so Lulu isn’t even pretending it’s not an interrogation anymore. That’s nice.
Xiao Zhan reaches for the bottle. Yibo and Lulu barely even blink after this round of drinks, but he most definitely feels it.
“So how is your visit so far? Is Zhanzhan being nice?” Lulu asks after putting her cup down.
“I think Chongqing is cool. Similar to Luoyang in some ways, but different enough to be interesting. I can kind of eat spicy now.” For the first time in this conversation there’s a hint of smirk on Yibo’s face, and Xiao Zhan knows what’s coming even before the boy continues. “It’s thanks to Ziyi and, of course, Zhan-ge. He has been the most gracious host: accommodating, helpful, kind, polite. A true prince, I dare say—”
“Jiejie!” Xiao Zhan interjects, probably louder than necessary. “He’s being mean to me again!”
“Pretty sure you are being complemented here, Zhanzhan,” Lulu raises an eyebrow.
“No, don’t be so gullible, he’s definitely being mean, did you hear him? You have to, like, defend my honour. You have to… have to bite him!”
Xiao Zhan starts giggling, Seungyoun’s agitated ten-year-old face in his mind’s eye.
“Sorry, what?”
“On second thought, no, don’t do it. I’d have to go to Yibo and ask to be punished, that’d be awkward.” Now he’s outright laughing, and the fact that Yibo’s ears have gotten red only makes it worse.
In a fit of disturbing flexibility, Yibo manages to kick him without shifting his position too much.
“Oh my god, how are you already this tipsy?” he rolls his eyes.
“I suppose I don’t want to know what this is about,” Lulu shakes her head and pours another round.
The evening continues in a similar fashion: the two of them drink, then comes a question, then they drink again. Rinse and repeat. Somewhere around the second bottle, Xiao Zhan starts having trouble keeping up with their conversation and switches to water.
It’s almost like watching a sparring session, Xiao Zhan’s head swivelling from his sister to his Yibo back and forth.
“Do you have any interest in learning how to run a kingdom?”
“That’s Yixuan’s job. I like to help where I can, and Han-ge has been teaching me some stuff, but ultimately I wouldn’t want to run a kingdom even if I wasn’t the youngest son.”
And
“I’ve heard a lot about your brothers from Zhanzhan, he says you boys made him feel welcome every time. Thank you for this. He can be a bit shy with strangers.”
“I was the shy one, and I hope I didn’t make things too difficult for him at the beginning.”
“I’m right here, assholes, stop acting like I’m not!”
And
“You mentioned animals. I presume you’ve met Jianguo?”
“I have. Zhan-ge’s been bitching—”
“Hey!”
“—about me stealing her, but he was gushing about her his whole last trip to Luoyang, can you blame me?”
And
“Right, I’ve seen your carving of Jianguo—”
“You have?”
“Yes, it’s beautiful. You are skilful.”
“Thank you.”
And so on and on and on.
When they finish the third bottle, still going strong, Xiao Zhan begins to succumb to the sleepiness that’s been pulling him in for a while and closes his eyes, just for a second. Yibo and Lulu seem fine anyway, their back and forth less of an interrogation and more of an actual conversation now. Whether it’s due to the building familiarity between them or the amount of wine they’ve drank, Xiao Zhan isn’t sure.
The last thing he hears is Yibo going on about something Xiao Zhan is too sleepy to concentrate on.
“…first time he showed me one of his paintings. I thought the way he sees the world is…”
***
Next morning, Xiao Zhan regrets every single one of his choices that has led him to this moment. He feels like shit, spends all morning in bed with a headache and only makes himself get up closer to noon.
The world is so unfair. And cruel. Specifically to him. When Lulu briefly woke him up last night to send him to his own rooms, she and Yibo looked, if not especially alert and sober, at least fully aware.
They probably don’t even have a hangover today, Xiao Zhan thinks gloomily as he goes through the motions of preparing for the day. It’s weird that no one has come for him yet, but he guesses Lulu must’ve warned people to leave him alone. She’s nice like that, when she isn’t plying his guests with alcohol to test them out.
After taking a bath he feels marginally more human and finally ventures outside.
Food is out of the question, but he could really go for annoying the shit out of someone with his hangover self. Except Yibo is probably still at Bouboo’s, Lulu is most likely busy, and everyone else is too far away to bother in his current condition.
However when Xiao Zhan asks around, servants tell him Yibo didn’t even leave the palace today and has been holed up in the library all morning.
That’s weird.
Xiao Zhan finds the boy near the shelves at the back. A few sunbeams spill through the window, making Yibo squint. He holds a rolled out book in one hand, the other one supporting Jianguo. She is stretched out on his chest, head tucked in the spot between his neck and shoulder.
Her purring can be heard even a few feet away.
They make such a cute picture Xiao Zhan can’t even master up any annoyance.
Still, “Do you bathe in catnip or something?”
Yibo puts down the book and slowly, so not to disturb Jianguo, turns to him.
“You’re up!” he says with a huge grin, which grows as he takes in Xiao Zhan’s disheveled state. “I’d say ‘good morning’, but it looks like it isn’t all that good for you. Is this what awaits me when I become an old man?”
“Wang Yibo, can’t you be a little kinder?” Xiao Zhan whines.
Really, how is this fair? The boy is alert and energetic, not a trace of a hangover.
“Sure I can.” With this, Yibo reaches for the flask at his waist and hands it to Xiao Zhan.
Xiao Zhan opens it, sniffs suspiciously, then takes a swig. It’s his green tea with medicinal herbs. He raises an eyebrow.
“I went to the kitchens and asked to make it,” Yibo shrugs, “figured you’d need a boost after coming back to the world of living.”
Okay, it is kind of him. While the purpose of the tea was to help Yibo’s body with all his intense training, the drink turned out pretty good in and of itself.
“Thank you, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan says, suppressing a smile. He clears his throat and continues, “So I hear you skipped practice today?”
“Uh…” The boy pauses, strokes Jianguo’s back, as if he’s, what, nervous? “I wanted to see if I could find the book.”
Alright.
Xiao Zhan lowers himself to the floor, leaning back against the nearest shelf. He pats the space next to him until Yibo sits as well. Again, he does it carefully, since Jianguo seems to be mostly asleep now.
“You think I haven’t checked?” Xiao Zhan asks, mock-offended.
“No, of course not. I guess I just needed to see for myself,” the boy says softly, not meeting Xiao Zhan’s eyes.
So something is definitely up.
“I have been searching, you know. I asked every foreign delegation, our librarian is also on constant alert.”
“Yeah, me too. But even Han-ge can’t find anything. It’s been so long now,” Yibo sounds truly upset now.
“Hm,” Xiao Zhan makes a wondering noice, “do you still think there’s a continuation?”
“What, you don’t?” Yibo asks sharply, finally looking directly at him.
“We can’t really know, can we?” There’s no need to coddle him. “We wanted to believe it so badly back then, but we were just kids.”
Yibo frowns, “What does age have to do with it? If you believe in something, you have to stick to it until the very end. Otherwise what’s the point?”
Stubborn, impossible boy.
Xiao Zhan beams.
“Well, there you go. Why the the mopey face then? I happen to agree with you. I don’t know if there’s a second book. But who cares what the odds are? We have to hope and do our best to look for it. That’s all we can do, right?”
Tentatively, Yibo smiles in return, “Yeah. Yeah, okay.”
That’s better.
But something had to have brought this on, and Xiao Zhan prods further.
“Did Lulu say something to you yesterday?”
Some of last night is kinda blurry, so he might’ve missed something, and that’s even before he conked out.
“What? No! No.”
Was that supposed to convince him?
Xiao Zhan squints at Yibo incredulously. On the one hand, his curiosity is piqued and demands to find out the answer. On the other hand, Yibo is resolutely staring back, as if he knows his lie is obvious but chooses to commit to it nonetheless.
Xiao Zhan snorts, “Fine!”
Let them keep their secrets.
Yibo smiles like he’s won. Which is ridiculous because Xiao Zhan let him win, there’s a difference.
“Your sister is pretty great, actually,” he says.
“Oh I see how it is,” Xiao Zhan tries to look as offended as possible. “You two ungodly drunks got all chummy and now conspire against me. Alright. Let’s see if Lulu will coach you through eating spicy. Or share her tea with you. Or go to your training sessions. Or give you praise when you demand it after doing 'this cool new trick’. Or—”
“Aww, Zhan-ge, don’t be jealous.”
“Who’s jealous, you gremlin?!”
The boy cackles, then says in an obviously fake sweet voice, “Zhan-ge, I’d still choose to drink with you, every time. After all, where else could I find someone with such pathetically low alcohol tolerance?”
Xiao Zhan bares his teeth at the boy and raises a hand to slap him.
“No, no, you can’t, I’ve got Jianguo!” He turns until the cat is in Xiao Zhan’s direct line of sight.
“Jianguo. Look at yourself. Now you’re deliberately making my life difficult. Princess, you’re breaking my heart.”
At the sound of her name in his voice, Jianguo finally raises her head from Yibo’s shoulder. She blinks at Xiao Zhan, twists out of Yibo’s arms and jumps down. After looking at the two of them for a beat, she chirps and walks away, tail up in the air.
“It’s your fault,” Xiao Zhan murmurs accusingly.
“Like hell! It’s yours,” Yibo shoots back.
“No, it’s yours.”
“No, yours.”
“Yours.”
“Yours.”
“Ugh, Wang Yibo! Fine, it’s my fault, just shut up,” Xiao Zhan takes a swig of his tea. “So childish…”
Almost immediately, Yibo grabs the flask and starts drinking.
“Hey, hey, it’s mine! You brought this for me, you can’t just steal it!”
“But Zhan-ge is being so mean, I think I deserve at least some compensation.”
“Who’s being mean, Wang Yibo?”
“You are!”
“No, I ask you again, who’s the mean one?”
“You are.”
Yibo is a little shit, acting so childishly, so Xiao Zhan, the mature and responsible one, has to assume the responsibility and talk some sense into him.
The resulting back-and-forth goes on for a while.
***
It seems like in no time at all Xiao Zhan finds himself waiting for Yibo by the palace gates again. Except now the boy is not wearing the coldest face Xiao Zhan has ever seen, he claps Yu Bin’s shoulder, talks about something with Ji Li and Ziyi, gets taken to a quiet corner by Ayunga. Xiao Zhan can’t make out what they’re talking about, but Yibo nods a lot.
It warms Xiao Zhan’s heart to see all this. In just two months Yibo’s managed to win over Xiao Zhan’s friends and make a space for himself here. He wonders if it was weird for Yibo when Xiao Zhan did the same in Luoyang, or if it made the boy feel the sort of pride Xiao Zhan is experiencing right now.
Of course, not everyone is in here. Some goodbyes were said earlier. He knows Yibo went to the city yesterday and spent a few hours with Haikuan. Zhuocheng and Yunlong couldn’t make it today, so they made sure to stop by the place last night and wish the boy a safe return home.
Turns out Bouboo didn’t even really need to say goodbye. A month into Yibo’s stay, when he started to become actual friends with his idol, he sent a letter home. The reply did not disappoint. Bouboo’s been offered a permanent high position in Luoyang, with opportunities and basically absolute freedom. At the time, Xiao Zhan made offended noises, but Bouboo’s stay in Chongqing was always going to be temporary. The man didn’t linger in one place for more that a few months. That is, evidently, until he met Yibo. Bouboo’s agreed to go Luoyang and would follow the prince only a month later.
Yibo easily makes people love him wherever he goes, and it is made especially clear at a moment like this, when people are reluctant to part with him.
Wang Han, who’s already bid everyone farewell, doesn’t seem to appreciate it from where he’s waiting inside the carriage. He meets Xiao Zhan’s gaze and rolls his eyes, smiling with the corner of his mouth. Xiao Zhan snickers and rolls his own as well.
Finally Yibo reaches Lulu. A servant hands her an intricately carved wooden box, which Lulu, in turn, passes to Yibo.
“I know you’re not much of a drinker,” they smile at each other, “but I’ve prepared Chongqing’s signature wine as a gift.” Seriously, did one night make them drinking buddies for life or something? Xiao Zhan resolutely doesn’t pout.
“Thank you, your highness.” Yibo bows low and proper, probably to hide his smirk.
When he straightens out, Lulu moves in close and whispers something to him. He nods and gives her a shy smile.
Xiao Zhan continues his not-pouting.
When the box is safely stored away in the carriage by another servant, Yibo comes up to him. For a moment, they just look at each other.
Then Xiao Zhan rolls his eyes again and says, “Go away already, it’s rude to make Wang Han-laoshi wait.”
“I’ll apologise to him later,” Yibo replies offhandedly and then smirks. “And there’s no need for such harsh words, you can just say you’ll miss me.”
“The only one who’ll miss you is Jianguo, you brat.” Xiao Zhan snarks because he’s pretty sure his cat is going to miss Yibo. The boy spent the entire morning hanging around Xiao Zhan’s rooms, petting, kissing and plying Jianguo with treats. She’s gotten fat in these two months. Xiao Zhan probably should’ve done something about that, but it’s too late now.
“So mean, Zhan-ge!” Yibo says and positively beams, as if Xiao Zhan being mean to him is something to be happy about.
Weirdo.
Xiao Zhan takes a flask from his waist and gives it to Yibo. “For your journey.”
“Thank you.” The boy takes it, twists it a few times in his hands. “Won’t be as fun without you to steal it from.”
“Guess you’ll have to manage somehow,” Xiao Zhan says, overcome with exasperated fondness.
“I guess so.” Yibo looks at him for a long moment and then softly asks, “See you next time?”
Xiao Zhan smiles and replies just as softly, “Yeah, see you next time, Bo-di.”
6
Greetings to His Royal Highness Xiao Zhan, the prince of the Kingdom of Chonqqing!
And all that stuff.
Hi, this is Yixuan.
I know Han-ge sent an official letter to your parents, but I thought you might appreciate something more personal.
It’s true that there’s some unrest on the border, but so far it doesn’t look too serious. That’s why we thought it’d be a perfect opportunity to gain real battle experience. Seventeen is a good age for Yibo’s first outing, I think. It’s not clear how long this is gonna take, plus you know him, once he’s out there, we’ll probably have to drag him back forcefully. So it makes sense to cancel your visit altogether, not just postpone it. You have your own life and can’t just change your schedule any time it suits Luoyang.
It’s a shame though, we were all looking forward to seeing you again. I guess we’ll have to wait another two years. But your next visit is totally happening, don’t make any other plans!
In case you decide to worry, Yibo won’t be alone, obviously. We’re all going. You have no idea what a headache it’s been, and we haven’t even set out yet. I don’t know who’s more eager, Wenhan, Seungyoun or Yibo, but the level of excitement these past few days has been kinda frightening. I can only—
Hello, Xiao Zhan! It’s me, Wenhan! Can you imagine, Xuan-ge thought he could write you a letter without us, he’s hilarious. How are you doing? We haven’t seen you in ages. When Bobo came back from Chongqing, he told us you’d gotten even taller and more handsome, and that was two whole years ago! You’re probably going around making people blind with your looks alone now. Anyway, I just wanted to say that if Bobo tragically falls in battle, you can always just marry me, so don’t worry too much, oka—
Sorry, Zhan-ge, Wenhan is experiencing a sudden and unexplainable pain, so he’s unable to continue his thoughtful offer.
Wow, this letter is mess. You’re probably glad you won’t have to deal with us for another two years. I suppose I should’ve written to you myself, but Xuan-ge is the mature one among us, so he thought of it first.
Zhan-ge, if in the incredibly sad case of my demise you absolutely must marry any of my brothers, I implore you to choose Sungjoo or Seungyoun. As the crown prince, Xuan-ge is probably a no-go. But don’t marry Wenhan! Or I’ll come back and haunt you. You know what, just go with Seungyoun, okay? He’ll take care of you properly, I swear. Or I’ll haunt him.
All that aside, it’s gonna be super safe. Can you believe Geng-ge — General Han Geng, I mean — is going with us? This unrest at the border is below his pay grade, but I guess mom and dad decided to err on the side of caution. That’s fine ‘cause Geng-ge is cool, I’m glad he’s gonna be our leader.
Kai-ge, Ji-ge and the rest are coming as well. Bouboo too, so you know nothing’s gonna happen to us. Zhan-he, he’s even better now, if you can imagine such a thing. He’s learned some of our Luoyang style and integrated it with his own, it’s spectacular! I’m so lucky to be able to learn from him. I can’t wait to show you how much we’ve improved together.
I guess I can though. Wait, that is. For what it’s worth, I’m really sorry for cancelling on you. This is something I need to do. I don’t want to just show off on the training field, I wanna go out there, use what I already have and then learn more, grow more. I hope you understand.
Well, that’s about it. Take care, Zhan-ge. I will most certainly see you next time.
I apologise. Yibo’s right, this letter is a mess. I guess we’ve said everything I wanted to when I started writing to you, if in a kind of round-about way.
Wish us luck!
Sincerely yours,
Yixuan, Wenhan and Yibo.
7
Spring is beautiful this year. Even though it’s only the middle of March, there’s warmth in the air that promises long sunny days filled with fragrance of things in bloom.
The only blooming thing in Xiao Zhan’s line of sight right now is a long stretch of canola fields, as far as the eye can see. It’s bright, lovely and lively in its beauty. Xiao Zhan’s artistic soul can’t help but admire this ocean of flowers.
He usually makes the journey to Luoyang inside a carriage, but it’s too nice a view to waste, so he’s chosen to trod along on a horse. It’s not exactly a sunny morning, the sky is kind of cloudy, but that just means Xiao Zhan doesn’t have to squint too hard to make out two riders heading towards them across the field.
The guards go on alert, but Xiao Zhan guides his horse a bit further into the field and orders them to stand down.
“It’s fine, I think I can make out Da-laoshi.”
As the riders get closer, it becomes clear that one of them, dressed in a colourful and eye-catching fashion, is indeed Da Zhangwei. The other… well. The other one comes to a stop a few feet away from Xiao Zhan’s horse, close enough for Xiao Zhan to look his fill.
To say that Wang Yibo at nineteen is unrecognisable would be a lie. His features are the same, but sometime during the four years Xiao Zhan hadn’t seen him, they have come together in a new and unexpected way to form a picture Xiao Zhan is not prepared for.
He’s still very thin, waist trim and almost delicate. But his shoulders are wide, hanfu stretched across them in a distinctly pleasing manner. Yibo’s hands have always been big and it hasn’t changed, Xiao Zhan notes as he studies them holding the reigns. Really, they are almost inappropriately huge. He wonders if they could encircle his entire waist.
When he looks at Yibo’s face, the first thing that steals his attention is how fair it is. Has Yibo’s skin always been this white? And then there’s his jawline: sharp, cutting, making his neck seem like a long and graceful line. And then there are his lips. Xiao Zhan remembers the boy pouting and smirking and smiling, but he can’t recall his lips being this full and pretty and… and…
Xiao Zhan moves his gaze upwards. Straight nose, clear eyes, sharp eyebrows, smooth skin. All of it on an exceptionally small face.
Yibo is, in a word, beautiful.
Not just pretty or handsome, but beautiful. He is undeniably, viscerally, physically human, but also etherial at the same time. The colourful background of thousands of yellow flowers kind of makes him look like a painting.
Xiao Zhan remembers Ayunga gushing about Yibo’s looks. He also remembers not really getting it at the time. Sure, even at fifteen Yibo had fine features, but that was just theoretical knowledge for Xiao Zhan, because Yibo was a kid, right, so what did it matter?
Well, he’s not a kid anymore.
Xiao Zhan struggles with this sudden realisation for a few moments.
When he finally gets a hold of himself, he has half a mind to be embarrassed of his staring. However Yibo himself only now shifts his gaze from somewhere in the vicinity of Xiao Zhan’s — wrists? — to look him in the eye.
“Sorry, I must’ve come to the wrong Luoyang. I was going to visit this bratty kid, but I definitely made some sort of mistake along the way,” Xiao Zhan says and raises an eyebrow.
Yibo smirks. “If that’s your way of telling me I grew up hot, you can just say so, I don’t mind.”
It’s actually exactly what Xiao Zhan is thinking, but he’d rather die than admit it.
“Humble, too,” he replies instead.
That makes Yibo laugh. It’s still a terribly croaky sound. More importantly, his cheeks still bunch up when he laughs, which makes Xiao Zhan feel inordinately pleased.
Yibo dismounts, and Xiao Zhan follows suit.
“Hey, Zhan-ge,” he smiles, and the sight of it up close is quite literally breathtaking.
What the hell.
“Ugh, look at you, I feel like I should be calling you ge,” Xiao Zhan grumbles, still reeling. But then he sees Yibo’s ears turning red and can’t help but take it further, this time intentionally, “Bo-ge.”
Yibo opens his mouth slightly, then closes. His ears are now flaming.
Fascinating.
Xiao Zhan is going to exploit the shit out of it.
A choked sound interrupts his thoughts. He finally wrenches his eyes away from Yibo and realises Da Zhangwei was just a few feet away this whole time. Behind Xiao Zhan, just on the edge of the field, are his guards. Na-jie is waiting in the carriage.
He kind of forgot about all of them for a second.
“Uh, hello, Da-laoshi,” Xiao Zhan smiles, wide and disarming, and bows.
Da Zhangwei seems to get over his sudden coughing fit and bows in return, as deep as he can while still sitting on a horse.
“Greetings, your highness,” he says and then squirms. “It’s nice to be seen and everything, but can we please get a move on? I’m so tired of this horse, and what are we even here for? This one,” he gestures at Yibo, “couldn’t wait at the palace like a normal person and just had to ride out ahead. It’s all well and good, but Han-ge got it into his head that a council member should be present to greet you. Why me, though? Why do I have to suffer?”
So Da-laoshi hasn’t changed much, Xiao Zhan thinks fondly.
“My apologies for the injustice,” he laughs. “You’re right, we should go..”
With that, he gets back on his horse and sees Yibo do the same.
Except they don’t all get back on the road and ride together, chatting and catching up, because Yibo grins and shoots Xiao Zhan a mischievous glance.
“Race you to the palace, Zhan-ge?”
What is Xiao Zhan supposed to do?
“You’re on.”
***
The first few days are hectic. Turns out when you make friends with people and then don’t see them for six years, there’s a lot to catch up on. Go figure. At least he saw Yibo four years ago, not that it prepared him for what he sees now in any way. Xiao Zhan has to sit down once he realises all Luoyang princes are grown up now.
Though they’ve definitely changed and matured, some things have remained the same: they clamour to regale him with tales of their time at the border, they boast and shout, making fun of each other in the process.
It’s makes Xiao Zhan terribly fond, glad to still have this despite the time that’s passed.
That is, until the bastards — mainly Seunyoun and Wenhan, of course — start waxing poetic about Xiao Zhan’s “ever growing beauty, so etherial and superior that its fame has reached even the most remote of places.”
Xiao Zhan finds out that actually only Yibo and Seungyoun stayed with the army for almost two years and have returned home just a month a half ago. Wenhan had to leave half a year before that since a royal representative had been required to visit the He Xing Wu Qi kingdom.
Wenhan gushes about Prince Yixing so much that Xiao Zhan’s curiosity is piqued. He’s heard a lot of great things about the guy, but now, after all of Wenhan’s talk, he decides he really wants to meet him.
Yixuan and Sangjoo, as the eldest, had to leave the border after only a year and continue their princely duties.
“I was relieved, to be honest,” Sangjoo confesses. “It was an interesting experience, I’m glad we got to do it, but I’d rather be here and fulfil my responsibilities to people in ways I’m best suited at. These three though,” he gestures to Wenhan, Seungyoun and Yibo, “were like fish in the water. Even Geng-ge didn’t expect them to be so eager and fit so well.”
As for Yixuan, Xiao Zhan makes sure to catch him alone early on.
“Thank you for that letter you send me back then,” he says with sincere gratitude. “I really did get worried after mom and dad received the official one.”
“I though you might,” Yixuan claps him on the shoulder. “I wanted you to know Yibo wouldn’t be alone, that we’d have his back.”
“Hey, I was worried about all of you!”
Yixuan laughs. “That’s nice to hear.”
He’s not the only one Xiao Zhan’s received letters from. Wang Han is his next stop.
Xiao Zhan bows deeply. “I’m here to express my gratitude, Wang Han-laoshi. Your updates these two years were greatly appreciated.”
Wang Han looks at him for a moment. His eyes are serious and piercing. Xiao Zhan feels seen through even though there’s nothing to see. Then the man smiles.
“You grew quite close to the boys thanks to these visits. Which was the whole point, of course. It’s natural that you’d want to know about their wellbeing. I’m glad my letters could help you in some way.”
“They did help, very much.“
Xiao Zhan had been more anxious than he could’ve ever guessed. Even if it was a minor squeamish at the border. Even if the main purpose was just to acquaint the princes with real combat. It’s not like he’d been in a state of worry this whole time, but he did come back to this topic in his thoughts quite a lot.
After Wang Han, he goes to the training grounds and gets roped into so many conversations and shenanigans that he loses half a day. There’s Xiao Ji, Yang Kai, Momo, Bouboo and so many others to catch up with.
Truth to be told, however, it’s hard to completely focus on all these people. Yibo is almost always around, and Xiao Zhan’s attention keeps slipping. Looking at Yibo kind of grinds his brain to a halt, with vague thoughts like attractive, hot and what the fuck floating around freely.
Yibo lets him take it easy at first, but he comes to Xiao Zhan’s rooms just an hour before midnight, makes himself comfortable and demands an update on the last four years.
Still shameless, Xiao Zhan thinks fondly. It doesn’t stop him from slapping the boy for such rude behaviour.
“Hey! Why are you hitting me? I come bearing gifts.” Yibo sets a flask on the table.
“Is that..?”
“Yep,” the boy grins. “I tried recreating your tea, I think it came out pretty good. Didn’t have a lot of opportunities to make it at the border, but I managed sometimes.”
Xiao Zhan takes a swig. It really is the same tea, as far as he can tell. He smirks, imagining Yibo drinking this medicinal concoction even without Xiao Zhan there. “Okay, consider the gift accepted.”
“Good! So, what’s up?”
Choosing what to share about a period of time this long turns out to be no simple task. So Xiao Zhan tells Yibo random things that come to mind, like Lulu proposing a few new laws to make positive changes in Chongqing, like Ji Li’s increasingly weird pets, like Ayunga winning an archery contest between four kingdoms and so on and so on.
“And Jianguo’s gotten a bit fat again, it’s kind of hilarious. I mean, she’s still a beautiful princess and all, but I could literally use her as a pillow now if I wanted too. Not that I would!” he hurries to correct himself and smiles ruefully. Thankfully, there’s a little wooden copy of his cat in this very room that he’s taken with him, so he doesn’t have to miss Jianguo too much. “Well, I don’t know what else to tell you. They were good four years, but nothing as exciting as your great deeds at the border. You’ve gotten the title of a captain, haven’t you? And now you even train your own group of soldiers. So impressive, Yibo-duizhang. Wait, no, no, I mean Wang-laoshi,” he emphasises the last title, partly teasing the boy, but mostly just proud of everything Yibo’s accomplished.
Except it makes Yibo frown. “Bullshit,” he says. “‘Nothing as exciting’? What about the changes you’ve made? What about your art and literacy programs?”
Xiao Zhan is genuinely taken aback. “You’ve heard about that?”
“Of course I have.”
Has he been keeping tabs?
“Okay. You know I don’t really have much interest in law, I tried it, enough to be of help if needed, but it’s not my cup of tea. Lulu’s definitely got it in this department. But I was going through our palace library one time and it kind of hit me that very few people have access to so many books. From there it was just a matter of making arrangements with local inns to organise events and book readings, stuff like that.”
“Just like that?” Yibo raises his eyebrows.
“Well, no.” He tells Yibo about the whole ordeal of setting up a team designated with copying books, and then distributing the copies to local libraries. He had to figure out how to make people come to book readings, what books would interest them, what time would be the best to attract a crowd, and so many other problems that occurred along the way.
“Branching out to music and painting was a logical next step. I guess I just wanted more people to have access to it, be they lords or farmers. I hope to make Chongqing a place where people know and enjoy its culture. I think it’s easy to just… get stuck in the mundanity of life, you know? That’s why art is so important. It broadens our minds, makes us think and feel more than we otherwise would. We need it to learn and grow, to become better.”
Yibo is looking at him with an expression Xiao Zhan has never seen on him before. “Xiao-laoshi,” he says, parroting Xiao Zhan’s address earlier, “if ever again you say ‘not exciting’ about what you’ve been doing, I’m gonna have to take out my sword and beat you with it.”
“As if you could,” Xiao Zhan rolls his eyes, but it’s a bluff, he knows Yibo could and would do it.
Ignoring him, Yibo continues, “Seriously, I think it’s amazing. You’re amazing.”
He says it with a completely straight face, like he means it.
“Ugh, stop it.” Xiao Zhan reaches across the low table they are sitting at and lightly swats his arm.
Yibo, of course, retaliates, and finally stops looking like Xiao Zhan has hung the moon.
“So. You guys have been gushing about your time at the border basically nonstop. Was it everything you wanted it to be?” he asks both to change the topic and because he’s genuinely interested.
Yibo thinks carefully before answering. “Yeah, in some ways. I enjoyed being there, living with our warriors, learning what it’s like. I enjoyed fighting, too. I’m good at it, Zhan-ge, not just in the training field, but in real battles.” He doesn’t boast, just states an undeniable truth. “I like knowing that. Plus, those bandits were wrecking havoc on nearby villages, stopping them was important, I’m proud to have been a part of that.”
There’s a long pause before he speaks again. “But I’ve seen things that… Whole villages burned down, crops and livestock destroyed, people killed or made to abandon their homes. It’s not like I had illusions before, but now I’ve seen that some people are just savages. They just like to kill, like fighting for its cruelty. Even among our men, there’s greed and ignorance and sometimes pointless violence.”
Yibo shakes his head and stops. Even though he’s still young, Xiao Zhan sees a newfound maturity in him. He didn’t just stop being a child, he was forced to grow up, fast, into someone who’s glimpsed the ugly side of life and learned to deal with it.
“It’s not just about the fighting. There was a flood once, a pretty bad one. It was technically on the territory of another kingdom, but what were we supposed to do, just ignore it? A whole village got flooded, we were the closest, so we went and tried to help as much as we could. We searched for missing people, shared our supplies, stuff like that. Then the help from their capital came, and some of their soldiers accused us of interfering with their kingdom’s business. Said we only helped to make ourselves look good. It was just a few men, and their prince — he came himself, that was pretty cool — shut them up immediately, but. Just. What? How twisted some people are to even think like that?”
He doesn’t look too agitated, mostly incredulous, but Xiao Zhan still wants to give him some sort of comfort, especially since he understands what the boy is talking about only too well.
“Some people are just like that,” Xiao Zhan says, making sure Yibo’s paying attention and not getting lost in his head. “There was a campaign against the changes I’ve made in Chongqing. Well, against me specifically, I guess.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah. I don’t even get what they were protesting. And there were lords and common folk alike, so somehow I managed to displease both sides. Did they not want easily accessible books? Or hate looking at paintings, or attending music performances, or getting free music lessons? I’d been called a ‘fake prince’ for a few weeks. Still don’t know why ‘fake’.”
Yibo sits up, visibly angry. “What the hell? Were those people found? Punished?”
“Hey, hey, Bo-di, calm down, we’ve dealt with it. I just meant that some people can look at anything and twist it any way they want. It’s useless to reason with them and try to understand their way of thinking. I’d be concerned if you did.”
“I guess you’re right. I mean, I basically came to the same conclusion. It doesn’t matter what random people think, as long as we know our own intentions and reasons for doing things. The best reaction to hate is no reaction at all, no feeling.”
“Mn,” is all Xiao Zhan can get out in response, surprised and gratified by Yibo’s take on this.
They stay silent for a while, but it doesn’t last. They go from topic to topic, and Xiao Zhan enjoys himself immensely. Talking to Yibo is easy and interesting. They’ve had very different experiences these past few years, but Yibo seems to understand whatever Xiao Zhan tries say, and shares many of Xiao Zhan’s thoughts. When they don’t agree on something, they argue heatedly, enthusiastically, fired up and startlingly awake for such late hour.
When they finally surface and think about time, it’s much closer to dawn than midnight. Xiao Zhan can’t feel any regret about lost hours of sleep. Just seeing Yibo all grown up was a revelation, but to speak with him like this and find understanding is something else entirely.
***
Shooting the shit with Yibo is no less exciting.
Soon after Xiao Zhan’s arrival a heat wave descends upon Luoyang. This must be some sort of cosmic joke, he complains, because it usually doesn’t get this hot here, especially so early in the spring. Seungyoun says Xiao Zhan has brought the heat with him from Chongqing, so it must be his fault, while Yibo insists that Luoyang just can’t handle Xiao Zhan’s hotness. They high five each other, and Xiao Zhan doesn’t kill them, but only because the sun makes him too lazy to move.
Right now they are waiting for Yibo’s brothers so they can all go to the training field while the sun is still relatively weak. It’s early morning, but Xiao Zhan is already dripping with sweat, the fan in his hand not doing much to help. He spares a moment to thank his past self for packing light clothes too. He can’t imagine surviving this weather in thicker, darker robes. A mere thought of leather wrist cuffs makes him shudder. He’d probably just melt in a matter of seconds. And Yibo would still stand there, pristine and unbothered by the elements.
Kind of like he is now.
“Isn’t it too hot for you too?” Xiao Zhan asks incredulously.
Yibo shrugs, “A bit, yeah, but I’m fine now. It’s much worse during practice.”
It makes sense, Xiao Zhan supposes. Sword fighting requires a lot of moving around, unlike archery. He’ll have to ask the kitchens for more tea. It wouldn’t do for Yibo to become dehydrated.
“Zhan-ge,” Yibo says with his gremlin smile on, “if you’re too hot, you can just take off your clothes and walk around naked, I’m sure it would help.”
Xiao Zhan snorts, “Would it, now?”
“Yeah, the breeze is probably very refreshing. If you’re shy, I can walk with you and shield you with a cloth or something,” he says with what could possibly pass for a straight face if not for a raised eyebrow that somehow makes him look completely shameless.
Well. If Wang Yibo thinks he’s going to win this one, he’s got another thing coming.
Xiao Zhan checks the courtyard they’re standing in, one of the remote ones. It’s early enough that no one is around yet, so he can probably get away with it.
“No need,” he says and starts working on his belt. “You’re right, it’ll be a relief to get rid of the clothes.”
Yibo’s eyes widen for a fraction of a second, but then he smirks and makes himself comfortable against the tree he’s leaning on, as if he’s waiting for a show.
Oh, Xiao Zhan is gonna give him a show. He’s got no problem with nudity, and this is actually kind of exciting, to be able to look in Yibo’s eyes and meet the challenge in them head on.
After the first layer of his hanfu falls on the ground though, it becomes less challenging and more intense, Yibo’s eyes burning through him with fierce focus. Yibo must’ve been wrong, because Xiao Zhan feels hotter despite the lesser amount of clothing.
Just as he’s shedding the second layer, he hears a loud yelp. Xiao Zhan turns around to find Yixuan standing on the other end of the courtyard, shielding his eyes. His face is bright red.
“What the fuck? You’re in public! Xiao Zhan, I expected better from you at least! Can’t you do it somewhere private?”
Yixuan shakes his head violently and hurriedly walks away, hands still covering his eyes.
Xiao Zhan turns back, looks at his clothes strewn on the ground, at himself — still wearing his inner layer, it’s not even that bad — and then meets Yibo’s eyes.
The second he does, they start laughing so hard they have to hang onto each other in order to not fall over.
Alright, so maybe him shooting the shit with Yibo is fun only for the two of them, not for other people, but Xiao Zhan decides he can live with that.
***
A few days later Seungyoun excitedly shakes a newly-delivered letter in everyone’s faces, and that’s how Xiao Zhan finds out about an upcoming visit from Prince Jiaer of the Wang Zhe Li Kan kingdom. Apparently, his travels will take him somewhere nearby, so he wants to use this chance to visit his friends.
All the brothers get unusually excited about this. Yibo tells him they fought along with Prince Jiaer against bandits on the border and it was actually Jiaer’s kingdom where the flood happened.
Seeing all this excitement makes Xiao Zhan curious what kind of person has managed to win the affection of all five Luoyang princes. He knows Chongqing has trade deals with Wang Zhe Li Kan, but everything else along with the kingdom’s prince is a blank slate in Xiao Zhan’s mind.
Prince Jiaer does not disappoint. Next morning he flies in, jumps from his horse, and proceeds to enthusiastically hug everyone welcoming him. He only pauses once he gets to Xiao Zhan.
“This is Xiao Zhan, prince of Chongqing,” Wenhan helpfully supplies.
Jiaer starts formally bowing, then freezes and quickly straightens to take a better look at Xiao Zhan’s face.
“Oh. Oh! You’re Zhan-ge!”
“I… am?”
“Hi, nice to meet you! Yibo used to talk about you al—”
There’s a movement on Xiao Zhan’s right. He can’t see what Yibo’s doing, but Jiaer aborts what he’s saying and corrects himself.
“I mean, he talked about you one time. Yeah,” he trails off and laughs nervously.
He looks so awkward and endearing in his panic that Xiao Zhan almost lets it go. Almost.
“Wow, really?” He widens his eyes. “One whole time? I feel so honoured. A single mention by his highness Prince Yibo is worth more than all the praise in the world.”
That gets Yibo going, just like Xiao Zhan thought it would.
“You know what? Yeah, I talked about you all the time.” Looks like he’s decided to own it. Good. “After all, Xiao-laoshi is an incomparable beauty, the pride of his kingdom, he’s smart and kind, the best archer in all the lands—”
“Wang Yibo, you shut up,” Xiao Zhan grits through his teeth and actually goes to put his hand over the brat’s mouth.
Surprisingly, Yibo lets him and just stands there, completely docile. Just in case this is a ruse, Xiao Zhan keeps his hand where it is and turns to Jiaer.
“Whatever he said is a total lie, I swear,” he bows, a little lopsidedly because of his hold on Yibo. “It’s nice to meet you too.”
“Oh, I don’t think he lied,” Jiaer says, a wide grin on his face, “you really are as pretty as Yibo said.”
For fuck’s sake.
So that’s why all five brothers like him so much.
***
Jiaer is only here for a day, but it is enough to see that he has the most manic energy Xiao Zhan has ever encountered.
He goes to greet the king and queen, then visits the training grounds where he continues his quest to hug as many people as possible. Many warriors recognise him and hug back with the same amount of enthusiasm.
He finds out about Xiao Zhan and Sungjoo’s semi-regular music sessions and before Xiao Zhan can even blink they’re being taught a new song from Wang Zhe Li Kan. Then Xiao Zhan catches sight of him and Yibo across one of the courtyards, and their heads seem to be connected by — something? — that makes them walk all weird, Yibo facing the front, Jiaer — the back of Yibo’s head.
“Just. What?”
“It’s better to not ask, believe me,” Yixuan claps Xiao Zhan on the back and continues their conversation as if nothing out of the ordinary is happening.
And so Jiaer flits here and there and everywhere, infectious laughter following him around the palace. Hot weather doesn’t seem to bother him at all. It’s hard not to get swept along with his enthusiasm, and Xiao Zhan finds it impossible not to like him.
He’s not at all surprised there’s a party late in the evening. Wine flows freely, people — mostly the ones who went to the border with the princes — come and go, someone breaks out a musical instrument or two.
He himself doesn’t drink much. He’d either fall asleep or start really going at it. Neither option seems appealing, since it’s not just the Luoyang princes here, or a person or two he trusts, but a whole crowd, including people from another kingdom he barely knows. No matter how friendly the gathering is, as a prince Xiao Zhan has to behave.
Yeah, it’s better to err on the side of caution and not test himself, he thinks as he watches Yibo laugh and drink another cup of wine, head thrown back, throat bobbing.
Xiao Zhan mostly stays quiet, sitting between Bouboo and Xiao Ji. At some point, everyone starts reminiscing about their shared adventures. Some of the stories Xiao Zhan has already heard from Yibo, others are new, so he listens intently.
“Oh, it reminds me! Yibo, what was that song you were always humming back then? Nan… something?”
“Nan Hai.”
“Yeah, that’s it!” Jiaer nods. “Woah, it got stuck in my head the other day, but I couldn’t remember any of the words.” He turns to Xiao Zhan, “Yibo once got super drunk and belted out the whole song, it was awesome!”
Yibo laughs. “It’s a good song.” His smile shifts into something gentle then and he shakes his head.
“Wow, a whole performance from Wang-laoshi? I’m sorry I missed it. How about repeating it now?” Xiao Zhan raises an eyebrow in a challenge.
For once, Yibo doesn’t rise to it. “Nah, the mood’s all wrong.”
They quickly move on with the conversation, but something in Yibo’s tone makes Xiao Zhan turn to Xiao Ji just then.
“Nan Hai, huh?” he asks quietly.
“Yeah, it’s…” Xiao Ji scratches his chin, exchanging a quick glance with Bouboo. “It really is a good song. You should ask him about it later.”
It’s tempting to question him further because Xiao Zhan feels like he’s missing something, but he lets it go for now, since Xiao Ji murmurs something about getting another drink and escapes.
Instead Xiao Zhan hangs out with Bouboo for a while, until he, along with Sungjoo, gets dragged to sing with Jiaer the song they learned today. Wenhan joins them in the middle, and it’s chaotic and probably bad, but it’s fun too, and also Yibo and Seungyoun laugh so much that they accidentally bang their heads against each other, so it’s definitely worth it.
A little later he and Wenhan are in the far corner of the room, discussing the merits of drunken improvisations during songs, when Yibo appears out of nowhere and plops right on the floor by Xiao Zhan’s legs.
“Zhan-ge, here you are!”
Wenhan takes one look at him and hurries to get up from his chair. “Fuck no, I’m out.”
Yibo tries turning towards his brother but overbalances and starts wavering.
Xiao Zhan rights him up. “Woah, settle down, gouzaizai.”
It comes out on accident, but really, Yibo sitting crosslegged on the floor, looking up with wide eyes is so much like a puppy that Xiao Zhan has to giggle. Yibo doesn’t seem to mind anyway. He puts his chin on Xiao Zhan’s knee, only furthering the similarity.
“Hi, Zhan-ge,” he says, grinning.
Xiao Zhan rolls his eyes, “Right, because we haven’t seen each other in such a long time.”
“Yeah, such a long time,” Yibo closes his eyes and sighs. Then, “Jiaer-ge and I are going to the training grounds in the morning, you should come with us.”
“Training, seriously?” Xiao Zhan squints at him. “After tonight?”
“It’s fine, I’ve been pacing myself.”
Xiao Zhan takes a moment to carefully look him over. He’s slightly flushed and unbalanced, inhibitions lowered, judging by his chin still on Xiao Zhan’s knees, but his speech isn’t slurred and he seems lucid enough. He looks just on the right side of tipsy. Well, Yibo always could drink outrageous amounts of alcohol without much consequences, and if he really has been deliberately keeping himself in check, he’s probably fine.
“And I suppose you still don’t get hangovers?”
“Nope,” Yibo answers with a shit-eating grin.
“Ugh, so unfair,” Xiao Zhan grumbles. “Why is it just you and Jiaer though?”
“For starters, I don’t think anyone else has been pacing themselves.” A quick glance around the room confirms it. “But mostly it’s just a thing we do.”
“How so?” Xiao Zhan asks, absently running his hand through Yibo’s disheveled hair. Yibo all but purrs at this and shifts to rest more of his weight on Xiao Zhan.
“Back when we first met at the border and decided to deal with the bandits together, there sometimes were long stretches of time with nothing to do. Geng-ge arranged friendly duels to keep the men entertained. Me and Jiaer-ge got paired up.”
“Who won?”
Yibo raises his head to glare at Xiao Zhan. “Who do you think?”
Xiao Zhan laughs, fondness bubbling inside him. “Alright, alright, of course you won, Yibo-ge.” He pats Yibo’s hair again until the boy continues.
“Damn right I did. He was a good opponent though. Skilled, sharp, inventive. So we kept at it. He’s only here for one day this time, we thought tomorrow morning would be a good opportunity. So will you come?”
“What am I even supposed to do while you two are busy?”
“You can practice archery if you want. Or just watch,” at this, Yibo’s face changes. He smirks just the tiniest bit and looks at Xiao Zhan from under his lashes. “I know you like to watch, gege.”
Okay, how did he go from a pile of goo in Xiao Zhan’s hands to this in a matter of seconds? Xiao Zhan wants to grab his face and do something about it.
Instead, he rolls his eyes. “Not as much as you like to be the centre of attention.”
“See, that’s a win-win situation,” Yibo crows triumphantly.
“Fine, okay, I’ll go.” Xiao Zhan gets on his feet and helps Yibo up as well. “But first we’re gonna get some water in you. Can’t have you dehydrated tomorrow, can we?”
Yibo follows him with only minimum grumbling.
Kind of like a puppy, Xiao Zhan thinks to himself and tries not to laugh too obviously.
***
Xiao Zhan swings by the kitchens, and people there are so used to him and Yibo making the same request over and over that they just give him a pre-prepared flask of the tea. He bows in thanks and uses his best smile, which makes them coo incessantly.
People who regularly provide him with Yibo’s tea successfully sucked up to, Xiao Zhan makes his way to the training grounds. Yibo and Jiaer already have their swords out, but Yibo quickly disengages and waves at Xiao Zhan once he notices him.
“Hey, Zhan-ge!” he yells.
“Hey, Zhan-ge!” Jiaer parrots and gets slapped with a sword sheath for it.
Xiao Zhan grimaces at them but dutifully waves back. He picks a nice spot to sit down and makes himself comfortable. When he’s done, Yibo and Jiaer are in motion again, way too energetic for an early morning, especially after a night of drinking.
Even as a spectator Xiao Zhan can tell that Jiaer is a formidable opponent. He may joke and goof around a lot, but in battle he is precise, powerful, putting his will and intention behind every move.
Xiao Zhan notes all this in passing, because try as he might he can’t tear his eyes away from Yibo for too long. Of course the brat was right yesterday, of course Xiao Zhan likes to watch. He liked it when Yibo was thirteen, and fifteen, and likes it even more now, having gained a whole new perspective on the boy.
Yibo is undeniably talented, it’s evident every time he so much as moves an arm. What’s also evident is his hard work: Xiao Zhan sees old techniques perfected, sees Bouboo in a particularly well-executed ground move, sees Yibo’s own sharp wit in every snap decision he makes in the middle of a fight. It’s a picture of grace and power anyone with eyes would appreciate.
Because Xiao Zhan doesn’t make a habit of lying to himself, he freely admits appreciating other things too. Like the fierce, determined expression on Yibo’s face, or the delicious twist of his slim waist when he avoids Jiaer’s blade, or the width of his shoulders, or how big his hands seem gripping his sword, or the white column of his neck glistening with sweat, or—
Something hits Xiao Zhan in the chest.
It’s a wrapped steamed bun.
He looks up, thoroughly confused.
Wenhan raises an eyebrow. “You are plotting a murder or you’re, like, really hungry. Either way, please stop looking at my brother like that right in front of me, it’s disturbing.”
Xiao Zhan huffs, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Sure.” Wenhan does an impressively theatrical eye roll.
“Did you come here to just chuck steamed buns at me or..?”
“Nah, I wanted to remind those fanatics about breakfast, they tend to forget about things like, you know, food once they get in the zone.”
“As if you’re not the same.”
“Shut up, we’re not talking about me right now,” Wenhan pushes him slightly, hiding a guilty smile.
“Okay, okay,” Xiao Zhan raises his hands in surrender and turns back to check on Yibo, only to see him and Jiaer taking a break or maybe already finished. Either way, he gets on his feet and smirks. “You know what, you have a point, just looking is stupid.”
“That’s not what I meant at all! Oh my god. I don’t wanna see it, Xiao Zhan!!”
Yibo is turned away from him, so Xiao Zhan tries to be as quiet as possible.
When it’s close enough he says, “Bo-di, think fast!”
He grins when Yibo manages to catch the flask thrown at him without any trouble.
“Thanks,” the boy nods smugly and takes a big gulp.
“Hey, I’m thirsty too!” Jiaer makes grabby hands at him.
Yibo, ever the gremlin, shields the flask with his body. “No, it’s my tea, go get your own.”
“Actually, it’s my tea,” Xiao Zhan interjects.
“But you brought it for me!”
It’s a good thing Yibo doesn’t know this whole tea thing started exactly for him. Too dangerous a knowledge for an ego this big.
“I can offer you a steamed bun instead, I guess,” Xiao Zhan gives the one he’s still holding to Jiaer.
“I… thank you?” Jiaer takes it, brows furrowed in puzzlement.
Xiao Zhan laughs. It isn’t exactly a good replacement for water when you’ve been engaging in an intense physical activity for the last half an hour. “Wenhan is over there,” he gestures behind his back, “he’s brought you breakfast, I’m sure he’s got water or something.”
“Why didn’t he come with you? Why is he just standing there?”
Xiao Zhan shrugs. It’s not like he can say that he kind of left Wenhan with the impression that he was about to jump Wenhan’s little brother.
“Well I’m gonna go to him, since someone is refusing to share,” Jiaer punches Yibo’s shoulder.
“Jiaer-ge, you know I would share my last food with you if I were starving,” Yibo answers sincerely, as far as Xiao Zhan can tell. “But just not this tea,” he finishes with relish and takes another sip.
“Yeah, I bet,” Jiaer snorts and bounds off.
Xiao Zhan pretends not to hear it. “So,” he starts, “since I’ve gone through all this trouble to bring you tea. And even let you shamelessly hoard it. I think it’s only fair you do something for me too.”
“Oooh, Zhan-ge, so cunning, so devious,” Yibo croaks in delight. “What is it? I shall do my best to provide whatever Zhan-ge wants.” The sly expression on his face makes it very clear what it is he’s ready to provide.
“Well, after such stunning display of swordsmanship,” Xiao Zhan takes his time to look Yibo up and down, “I want to ask Wang-laoshi to waste his precious time on me and teach me some of his skills.”
All the joking is instantly gone from Yibo’s face. “For real? You want to train with me?”
“Not continuously, but a little, yeah.”
“Right now?”
“Sure.”
“Okay, I can do that!”
Alright, Xiao Zhan might’ve started this with the same thoughts that got interrupted by Wenhan, but seeing Yibo genuinely excited about it makes him feel all warm.
Yibo’s whole demeanour changes once he switches into instructor mode. This must be the laoshi young trainees face when they come to learn sword fighting. He’s serious and focused as he goes to get Xiao Zhan a sword and checks it for imperfections, makes sure Xiao Zhan is dressed appropriately and there’s nothing to constrict his movements.
“Wow, so responsible, Wang-laoshi,” Xiao Zhan teases.
“Only the best for Zhan-ge,” Yibo grins and steps back a few paces. “Alright, show me what you’ve got.”
Xiao Zhan complies. He strikes, and Yibo parries it. He tries again and again, and each of his blows is met and blocked with ease.
“Your forms are good,” Yibo nods approvingly, “show me more.”
He does. Soon Yibo starts making his own moves and Xiao Zhan is forced to act fast in order to fend him off.
Yibo makes him work for it: a slash here, a heavy swing there, then a feign followed by a real thing. Xiao Zhan tries to puzzle out his next move, but is too slow and ends up stumbling back with the force of Yibo’s blow he doesn’t quite block.
“That’s your problem, Zhan-ge, you think too much.”
Xiao Zhan nods. It’s true. He focuses too much on trying to guess what his opponent will do, or on planning his own actions, instead of following his instincts. Yibo seems to be the opposite: he moves as if he doesn’t have to think at all, his mind and body completely in synch.
“Let’s try again.”
Yibo darts forward, and Xiao Zhan has to react fast. He ducks and goes for Yibo’s legs. Yibo jumps to avoid the swipe, dances back, then does some sort of spin that ends with a blow Xiao Zhan barely has time to block.
Over their crossed blades, Yibo grins at him, “Not bad, old man.”
“Who’s old, you brat?” Xiao Zhan says indignantly and kicks his knee.
They continue like this, constantly moving and dissing each other at the same time. Xiao Zhan finds himself relaxing into the rhythm. This is actually fun. Yibo is making it fun, his comments calculated to take Xiao Zhan out of his own head. It’s working.
He remembers his previous lessons, uses what Bouboo taught him years ago, and soon they are going at it pretty hard. Xiao Zhan is already sweating. It’s too hot for this, even in the morning, and the spark in Yibo’s eyes does nothing to cool him down. Yibo, of course, is barely out of breath. He’s probably doing a quarter of what he’s capable of, but he seems to be enjoying himself as well.
Still, after a while Xiao Zhan can’t help but tease him. “Come on, I’m not made of glass, you can go harder on me.”
Yibo’s mouth twists, and that’s all the warning Xiao Zhan gets because the switch is instantaneous. He finds himself under the barrage of hits so fast, forceful and precise that he can barely parry them. So that’s what Yibo’s like when he doesn’t hold back.
No, that’s not right, he’s definitely still holding back, or Xiao Zhan would already be dead.
Even so, he finds himself being pushed back in what feels like no time at all, until Yibo disarms him and pushes him against the wall, forearm across Xiao Zhan’s chest to hold him in place, the other arm putting his blade to Xiao Zhan’s exposed neck.
Xiao Zhan bucks with his lower half, mindful of the sword, trying to throw him off, but that just makes Yibo push harder, pressing Xiao Zhan back with the weight of his whole body.
Fuck. Xiao Zhan throws his head back and works on not letting any embarrassing noises out.
When he gets a hold on himself and opens his eyes, Yibo is already looking at him, steady and focused, but finally out of breath.
“Was that hard enough for you, Zhan-ge?” he asks with a feral grin that makes Xiao Zhan’s blood sing.
Xiao Zhan throws him a coy glance and plays his trump card. “Yeah, just right, Bo-ge.”
Yibo’s gaze darkens, and he looks like he’s about to do something stupid, right here in the open.
Xiao Zhan likes stupid so much. Loves it. Has never wanted stupid more in his entire life.
Unthinkingly, he starts moving forward. Except he forgets about the sword at his throat.
The second the steel brushes against Xiao Zhan’s skin, Yibo is off him. He steps back, swearing, and sheaths his sword.
“What the hell, Zhan-ge!”
“Hey!” Xiao Zhan touches his neck and finds it unmarred. Yibo really does have a very fine control. “I’m not the one who goes around putting sharp steel to people’s throats,” he says as if it wasn’t him who provoked Yibo in the first place.
Yibo gapes at the audacity and does the only sensible thing here: he hits Xiao Zhan’s arm.
Xiao Zhan supposes it’s fair, and retaliates only a little bit.
Yibo backs off and raises his arms in surrender. Xiao Zhan squints at him suspiciously.
“Wanna go for another round?” the boy asks.
Something about caution, boundaries and stupid things does flit through Xiao Zhan’s mind.
Still, there’s only one way to answer this question.
“I do.”
***
They end up losing all morning on the training field, but come back just in time to see Jiaer off. Xiao Zhan ends up fond of the guy to some degree. He’s a lovely person: extremely energetic, loud, sometimes a touch more that is appropriate, yet warm, open and genuinely good, as far as Xiao Zhan can tell.
Jiaer hugs everyone who’s come to say goodbye to him, be it the princes, some of the warriors or a random kid from training he’s managed to charm in one day. He doesn’t skip Xiao Zhan this time.
“Really nice to meet you, I mean it!” he says enthusiastically. “Come visit me sometime! You should all visit me. Or we could all go find some bandits to fight, that’d be fun too!”
In a flurry of last hugs and parting words, Jiaer gets on his horse, nods to his companions, and then he’s gone.
Xiao Zhan blinks, slightly dazed. It seems impossible that it’s only been one day.
Seungyoun pats his shoulder, “You get used to him.”
Xiao Zhan isn’t quite sure that’s true.
In any case, they seem to get infected by Jiaer’s abundant energy and soon deem nearby lakes warm enough for swimming. It’s not exactly true, but the ongoing heatwave makes everyone eager enough to brave the lingering chill of the water.
When Wenhan suggests an outing, Xiao Zhan is just as enthusiastic as the others, so he has no one to blame but himself when next morning he wakes up with a sore throat, a pounding head and a fever to top it all off.
Na-jie is onto him the moment she spots him. Thankfully, she knows him well enough not to kick up a fuss, so at least when she forces him into bedrest, she does it quietly.
Not quietly enough, it seems, since Yibo shows up in his rooms only half an hour later.
“Zhan-ge, are you okay?”
“Oh my god, what are doing here?” Xiao Zhan complains, shifting for what seems like a millionth time in search of a comfortable position. “It’s Sunday, don’t you have Tian Tian Xiang Shang today?”
Yibo comes closer to the bed, his face worried. “I’m skipping it,” he says in passing, refusing to move on from his question. “Is it bad? Should I get the physician?”
Xiao Zhan turns to lie on his left side in order to face the boy, mainly to squint at him grumpily. “He’s already been here, stop fussing. I’m fine, it’s just the remains of my cold.”
“The remains?” If possible, Yibo is even more alarmed now. Great.
“Ugh. I was sick not long before my departure from Chongqing. I was mostly fine by the time I had to set out. But my stupid body decided chilly water is too much for it even weeks later.”
“Wait, you were sick and still decided to go? Zhan-ge, you should take better care of yourself!” Yibo frowns at him, and that just makes Xiao Zhan even more irritated.
“What was I supposed to do? Delay? You would’ve rushed into another battle in the meantime and then where would we be?” That’s probably a little mean, but no one asked Yibo to barge in here with his judgy eyebrows. Xiao Zhan wanted to go to Luoyang, so he went. “And anyway, I said I was fine. I wasn’t sick when I got here, wasn’t i?”
“Wow, you’re an asshole when you’re sick,” Yibo says it with an amused smile, to Xiao Zhan’s annoyance.
“Yes I am, so go away and stop bothering me.”
It’s true, Xiao Zhan is kind of awful once he catches a cold. He hates being a bother and making people worry, hates to disturb anyone’s schedule, his own included. It’s even worse here, in another kingdom, where things are expected of him and he inconveniences a royal family.
More than that, all he wants to do is complain and moan about how shitty he feels, which he usually doesn’t like doing. Something about being sick makes him especially short-tempered and almost incapable of keeping himself in check. Of course, complaining or snapping at someone usually leaves him feeling guilty, which only makes things worse.
It’s an unpleasant time all around, and Xiao Zhan can only be grateful he doesn’t get sick very often.
Yibo doesn’t seem deterred though. He pokes around the tray of food left by the physician.
“You didn’t eat anything?”
“I’m not hungry.”
That makes Yibo stop looking so well-intentioned, to Xiao Zhan’s vindication.
“You need to eat, otherwise how can you get better?”
“Are you my mother?” Xiao Zhan rolls his eyes and instantly regrets it, his migraine rearing its ugly head.
He closes his eyes for moment, and when he opens them again, Yibo is putting shade over windows so the light doesn’t stream into the room.
“Hey, you don’t need to do this,” Xiao Zhan says.
“Your head hurts, right?” Yibo shrugs as he finishes his task.
“It doesn’t mean you have to become my caretaker all of a sudden. I’m not a baby, I can do it myself if I need to.” It’s bad enough that Yibo’s missing TTXS, now he’s going to waste his time on shades? This is exactly why Xiao Zhan hates being sick.
“I’m just trying to help.”
“Well I didn’t ask you to!”
“Zhan-ge,” Yibo starts, serious now, “you know it’s okay to admit you’re unwell, right?”
He’s so calm that Xiao Zhan explodes on principle. “Fine! My whole body aches, and my head is killing me. I can barely breathe with this congestion, and I’m too hot, but it’s also too cold in here! I want to sleep but fucking can’t, because being sick is the worst!” He should stop here, but he’s miserable and feverish, and Yibo is making it worse, so he can’t stop now that he’s started whining. “Lying here is uncomfortable, and I hate waisting time like this! On top of that, instead of letting me suffer in peace you’re here. I can’t entertain you today, so just leave me be, is that so hard?”
Yibo’s face is unreadable, but there seems to be anger lurking in the solemn set of his mouth. Xiao Zhan doesn’t care, he just wants to be left alone.
“Okay.” With that, Yibo turns and leaves.
For a whole minute Xiao Zhan feels victorious. What was Yibo even trying to do, nurse him back to health? As if Xiao Zhan is some kind of child incapable of taking care of himself. He’s the one to take care of people, okay, not the other way around, everyone back home knows it. He doesn’t even let Lulu fuss too much, because she has a lot of responsibilities, she doesn’t need another burden when he decides to get sick. Na-jie knows it too, that’s why she arranged everything and then let him be. Yibo, on the other hand, barged in and looked like he was here to stay.
Of course, then comes the guilt, and Xiao Zhan feels even worse than before. The thought of apologies is exhausting, but then his head is so fuzzy with fever that basically everything seems exhausting.
The fact that his headache abates a little, now that there’s no direct sunlight in the room, is not making his mood better.
Upset, irritated with himself, Yibo and the world, he tosses and turns for what seems like a long time.
Then the door slides open again and in comes Yibo with a tray.
Xiao Zhan watches warily as he carefully sets the tray by the bed and moves aside the one the physician left.
“You can snap at me all you want, Zhan-ge, I don’t care about that,” Yibo says, staring him down. “What pisses me off is your inability to let go of control even for minute. You have to let people take care of you every once in a while, you know?”
Xiao Zhan opens his mouth, whether to lash out or apologise he doesn’t know himself, but Yibo doesn’t give him a chance to do either.
“This is spicy pepper soup,” he gestures to the tray, “it’s good for your stomach and it will help to clear up your nose. You’re gonna eat it even if we kill each other in the process.”
They glare at each other for a few moments until Xiao Zhan relents and takes the bowl. The soup does seem much more inviting than the plain congee he was supposed to eat earlier.
“I’d kill you first,” he murmurs spitefully, trying not to smile.
“In your dreams,” Yibo snorts and takes his own bowl. Evidently, he’s thoughtful enough to not let Xiao Zhan eat alone. Asshole.
They drink soup in silence for a couple of minutes.
“I’m sorry, Wang-laoshi,” Xiao Zhan finally says, “I just really hate being sick.”
“Yeah, no kidding, nice to know even the impeccable prince of Chongqing has his low moments,” Yibo laughs when Xiao Zhan hits him, then continues. “But you know sickness is just your body’s way of telling you to take it easy for a while. You have to listen to it.”
“Do you listen to your body?”
“I do, actually. If my heartbeat starts going crazy during practice, I have stop and rest, even if I think I can go on. If my breathing gets too shaky, it means I need to check if it’s normal exhaustion or my heart acting up. It doesn’t happen often, but I have to be careful, always.”
Of course. Yibo understands these things better than most.
“Okay. Yes, you’re right.”
“See, that wasn’t so bad,” Yibo smirks, his face insufferably smug.
When they finish the soup, he pours Xiao Zhan a cup of tea. It’s not their usual stuff. Xiao Zhan sniffs and makes a face.
“It might smell weird,” Yibo warns belatedly, “I asked to put some medicinal herbs in there, to help you sleep.”
“So that was your plan all along? Knock me out so I wouldn’t be mean to you?” Xiao Zhan eyes him but takes a sip anyway. It’s not too bad.
“Not at all. Be mean to me more, Zhan-ge,” Yibo avoids a well-deserved swat and tidies up, stacking their bowls back on the tray.
The combination of soup and tea makes him feel less miserable — Yibo being stubborn and coming back has nothing to do with it — and soon he can barely keep his eyes open.
“Come on, lie down,” Yibo hovers until Xiao Zhan complies and then, absurdly, actually tucks him in.
“Wow, premium care from Wang-laoshi, I’m so honoured,” Xiao Zhan huffs and accepts the answering slap with dignity. “Are you gonna insist on doing this until I get better? I could snap at you again.”
“Okay.”
“I’ll whine about every single ache in my body.”
“Okay.”
“And expect you to bring me food every time now.”
“Okay.”
“Ugh,” Xiao Zhan turns on his side to face Yibo, “you’re the worst.”
“I actually think I’m the best, but if Xiao-laoshi says so, it must be true,” Yibo answers in an overly sweet tone.
Xiao Zhan fails to keep his smile in check. But even that gets to be too much, so he closes his eyes and starts drifting almost immediately.
“Yibo-ge,” he murmurs, half-asleep already, “I want to hear that song, Nan Hai.”
There’s silence for a long moment. Xiao Zhan thinks about checking on Yibo, but his eyelids are heavy and the world is too fuzzy.
Then Yibo starts singing. It’s beautiful, all the more so because of Yibo’s voice.
Had Xiao Zhan been more awake, he might’ve panicked about the song’s aching tenderness, the depth of feeling it conveys.
As it is, it makes him just a little bit more sure about whatever has been going on these past few weeks.
***
It doesn’t take too long for Xiao Zhan to get back on his feet, which is just as well, since the main week of the peony festival is soon upon them. They choose a day to make an appearance in the town. Seungyoun makes them all wear flower crowns, they smile and wave at people, watch a performance or two, eat too much food at the stalls lining the streets, and buy little peony-shaped lanterns.
All in all, it’s a successful outing, so Xiao Zhan is somewhat alarmed when the very next evening Yibo finds him and throws a bundle of clothes at him.
“We’re going out,” he says.
Xiao Zhan examines the bundle in his hands. It’s dull grey and brown, made out of rough cloth, something a villager might wear, and a poor one at that. Come to think of it, Yibo is wearing a very similar hanfu and a straw hat.
“Some context would be nice,” Xiao Zhan raises an eyebrow.
Yibo looks over his shoulder impatiently, as if afraid someone might barge into Xiao Zhan’s rooms.
“You know about Lin Hai-laoshi?”
“Yeah, so?” It’d be hard not to, he’s famous in numerous kingdoms for his musical talent. Xiao Zhan has never actually seen him or heard him play, but some of his songs are popular enough among Chongqinq’s musicians that Xiao Zhan is familiar with the man’s art.
“He’s here for the festival. He’s giving a performance at one the inns tonight.”
“Woah, really? Then what are we waiting for?” Xiao Zhan makes for the door, then stops. “Wait, how do these clothes fit into this?”
Yibo grimaces. “We just went through the hustle of a public appearance. Do you really want to go as a prince?”
Xiao Zhan pauses, thinks about royal guards and people staring. Well.
“So you propose to dress up as peasants and sneak out?”
“What, you’ve never done it back home?”
“Not the dressing up part, no,” Xiao Zhan shakes his head.
“We do it all the time,” the boy grins. “It’s fine, as long as it’s only two or three of us and the others are here to cover for us.”
“Wait, so the others aren’t coming? Wouldn’t at least Sungjoo and Wenhan like to see Lin Hai-laoshi too?”
“Nah, it’s cool, they said they can just go another time, he isn’t here for just one evening. So, are you coming?”
Xiao Zhan glances at the clothes he’s still holding, then grins, “Na-jie will kill me if she finds out.”
With that, he starts working on his belt. This time he sincerely doesn’t stop to think that it might be inappropriate. After all, it’s just Yibo, and he’s already stripped in front of him, so what’s the big deal?
Of course, that’s when Yibo whistles and leers, “Wow, Zhan-ge, if you get tired of being a prince, you won’t have any trouble finding work.”
“Wang Yibo, are you human?” he chucks his outer robe at the brat.
It doesn’t take long to put the rough clothes over his own inner layer, neither does messing up his hair.
“So, how do I look?” he asks when he’s done.
Yibo eyes him critically, comes closer to fuss with his hair, making the strands cover more of Xiao Zhan’s face.
“We should get you a hat too,” he frowns. “Your face is gonna be a problem.”
“What’s wrong with my face?” Xiao Zhan asks. He has half a mind to act offended, but Yibo’s own face is very close. Xiao Zhan can see a tiny mole below his eyebrow very clearly. It would be the easiest thing in the world to lean in and kiss him.
“You’re too handsome, Zhan-ge,” Yibo shakes his head, breaking Xiao Zhan’s reverie. “Even if people won’t recognise the prince of Chongqing, they’ll definitely know you aren’t a farmer.”
“What, you’re saying your face won’t give you away?”
“I’m not as handsome as Zhan-ge,” Yibo grins and dances away when Xiao Zhan hits him, “but just in case, I am wearing a hat.”
“Fine, go get me one too,” Xiao Zhan says primly, inspecting the hem of his new outer layer. “Wait, are these your clothes?”
“Yeah, why?”
“The hem is kinda short,” he laughs at the face Yibo makes, but then continues seriously, “it probably looks weird. Should I borrow something from your brothers instead? Maybe Sangjoo or Yixuan, they’re closer to me in height?”
“No!” Yibo exclaims vehemently, then coughs. “I mean, if you are a poor villager, it’s normal that your clothes don’t fit you exactly right. It’s better for your cover.”
Oh, Xiao Zhan would dearly love continue this conversation, and judging by Yibo’s face he knows Xiao Zhan is onto him, but they don’t really have the time now.
“… okay. We should get that hat and go, I don’t want to miss Lin Hai-laoshi.”
Yibo nods, seeming all too eager to move on from the topic of Xiao Zhan wearing other people’s clothes.
***
At the inn, they find a dark corner and take the hats off. No one recognised them in the streets, and Xiao Zhan would like to keep it that way, but here no one is paying them any attention at all, all eyes on a makeshift stage. Lin Hai is probably due to appear any moment now.
Xiao Zhan makes himself comfortable and turns to Yibo at his side.
“Have you ever heard him play?”
“Once, when were were passing through a town near the border. He played guzheng, it was unbelievable,” Yibo shakes his head and then laughs a little, “Kai-ge actually cried, if you can believe it.”
Xiao Zhan would be surprised, but he knows that underneath the tough warrior exterior Yang Kai is actually a big softie. Still, the thought of him being so moved by art makes Xiao Zhan smile.
Just then out come not one, but two people. Evidently, Lin Hai has a partner today. They greet everyone and take their places. Xiao Zhan can see only two instruments: a guqin and a dizi. A hush falls over the crowd as Lin Hai raises the dizi to his lips.
It’s not like Xiao Zhan hasn’t heard a dizi before, that would be ridiculous. But from the first notes the sound grips him and makes him sway forward. The melody starts out gentle, then gains momentum, and suddenly Xiao Zhan is thirteen again, finding out what a creature full of sunlight can become when put in the wrong circumstances. He closes his eyes and sees, just as clearly as when he was reading the book, the black and the red, lakes full of blooming lotus flowers and austere mountains with bamboo groves, sees tainted dirt that nevertheless produces wonderful things, and above all he sees the most luminous smile, feels the most dazzling presence.
Then the strings of guqin join in, and the melody turns into a conversation. The dizi swells, high and piercing, the guqin echoes it, steady, and it goes like this, a push and pull, a question and an answer, different voices but the same meaning.
Xiao Zhan feels robbed. At the end of the book, the sound of dizi abruptly, forcefully stopped, frozen on a haunted, mournful note, and the duet was interrupted before it could reach its full potential.
When he notices movement underneath his hand, Xiao Zhan looks down and realises that he’s been gripping Yibo’s forearm, probably for a while. Now Yibo shifts and envelops Xiao Zhan’s hand in his own.
Yibo looks at him and twists his mouth into a crooked smile. His eyes are slightly glassy.
“Guqin and dizi, huh?” he whispers.
So he’s thinking about the book too. Xiao Zhan is profoundly relieved, grateful for this understanding. He doesn’t have to ask or explain, Yibo knows exactly what Xiao Zhan is feeling right now.
Only then he becomes aware of his own eyes being wet, and blinks, a few tears spilling over.
With Yibo’s hand anchoring him, Xiao Zhan closes his eyes and lets the music and the visions of waterfalls, green mountains, and the absolute synchronicity envelop him.
***
It rains incessantly for a few days in late April. On the second day Xiao Zhan wakes up, hears the tell-tale sound of the downpour and promptly goes back to sleep.
He wakes up again closer to noon. It’s weird that no one’s come to bother him the whole morning. Maybe everyone’s decided it’s too wet to do anything, he would certainly agree if that were the case.
He goes to find Yibo, since it’s basically second nature for him now.
When Xiao Zhan gets to the prince’s rooms, he finds Seungyoun and Yibo cuddled up on the floor leaning against the bed. Yibo is busy with a half-done carving he’s working on, while Seungyoun mostly dozes off, serving as a pillow for him to sprawl over. Although it’s not exactly clear who’s doing more sprawling, since Seungyoun has a leg over one of Yibo’s.
They are a confusing tangle of limbs that reminds Xiao Zhan of the puppy piles he used to walk in on when they were younger. There’s obviously less of that going on now, but it’s nice to see some things remain the same.
As nice as it is, Yibo’s face seems off, somehow, and paired with the sudden burst of physical clinginess, it sets off alarm bells in Xiao Zhan's head.
He clears his throat. “Productive morning?”
Yibo looks up, “More productive than yours, sleeping beauty.”
Xiao Zhan comes closer and sits by the low table on the twins’ side. “How do you know I wasn’t painting or reading this whole time?”
“Well, were you?”
“None of your damn business,” he sniffs and picks up a bowl of berries from the table.
When Yibo croaks his gremlin laugh in answer, Xiao Zhan settles a little. That’s better.
Then he catches a now completely awake Seungyoun looking at him. It’s not hostile or anything, but the boy’s eyes are serious, heavy, evaluating. Seungyoun hasn’t looked at him like that since his first visit to Luoyang.
Xiao Zhan becomes abruptly aware that neither him nor Yibo have been particularly subtle these past few weeks. He also remembers that there’s a reason these two are called twins. Seungyoun is probably the person closest to Yibo. Most protective too, which says a lot, considering that Yibo is surrounded by adoring geges on a daily basis.
He doesn’t know why now, what set it off, but there’s probably a shovel talk coming.
Of course this is exactly the moment Yibo notices Xiao Zhan snacking on the berries, so he puts down his knife, taps Seungyoun’s arm around his neck and gets up.
“You haven’t had breakfast yet, have you?”
“It’s fine, I can just—”
“I’m gonna go ask someone to bring you food. Zhan-ge, you’ve got to take better care of yourself.”
“Oh my god, stop harping already,” Xiao Zhan rolls his eyes and gets whacked on the shoulder when Yibo makes for the door. “This is elderly abuse!”
“The elderly can fucking take it.” With an annoying smirk, Yibo closes the door behind him and leaves.
Xiao Zhan snorts, but quickly sobers up. Right. The shovel talk.
Except Seungyoun stays silent.
Well. Xiao Zhan is not one to miss opportunities. He’s got a couple of questions of his own.
“Is he okay?”
Seungyoun titles his head, “Why are you asking?” His gaze is still solemn, calculating.
Xiao Zhan meets it calmly. “He seemed a bit off.”
“Bad dreams. We all get them sometimes. Not everything about the last three years was fun and exiting.”
Alright, that makes sense.
Xiao Zhan nods, “Yeah, he told me a little about it.”
“He did?” Seungyoun looks taken aback. “Okay. Well, if Bobo has an especially bad dream, he usually needs some time for himself.” He pauses. “Except, apparently, when you skip breakfast.”
“Is that good or bad?”
Seungyoun studies him for a long moment, before his eyes transform into half-moons and he gives Xiao Zhan one of his dimpled smiles.
“Good, I think.”
Xiao Zhan hadn’t exactly been seeking anyone’s approval but now that he has Seungyoun’s, it feels absurdly good.
“What’s with the face? Now you look like you’re angling for some cuddles.” With that, Seungyoun bounces up and suddenly he has an arm around Xiao Zhan’s shoulders and a finger poking Xiao Zhan’s cheek.
Seems like the boy has made a decision and has no trouble moving on from whatever doubts he had. Lucky him.
By the time Yibo gets back, they’ve taken spare pieces of wood he had lying around and started working on their own little carvings. Of course, neither of them is even close to Yibo’s skill, but it’s an afternoon well-spent nevertheless. It gets even better when Xiao Zhan’s food arrives, appealingly red.
And even if they’re quieter than usual, that’s okay, Xiao Zhan likes days like this too.
***
A week before their departure from Luoyang, Na-jie finds him in the main courtyard. Xiao Zhan originally came here to greet the princes and then to be on his way. An important foreign delegation is here for today, and all five royal brothers are required to be precent throughout the day’s ceremonial events. Xiao Zhan, being more of a personal guest by now than a political one, is only supposed to show up for the evening banquet, so he was just going to hang out with Bouboo and the guys today.
But he kind of got stuck before he even said hello to the princes.
Just a week left.
They are in ceremonial garb, obviously making fun of each other, poking at flowing sleeves and lavish embroidery. They are much more used to practical warrior clothing, Xiao Zhan supposes. He can sympathise: he wouldn’t be caught dead wearing something with sleeves this huge unless the occasion would absolutely demand it.
Na-jie comes up to him, but seems to sense his solemn mood, because she doesn’t say anything right away. They watch the boys for a few minutes.
Yibo and Seungyoun are in their asshole twin mode. They circle Yixuan and spew enough bullshit — Xiao Zhan can tell it’s bullshit even from this distance — to make him blush and sputter. They run when Yixuan’s retaliation comes, Yibo hiding behind Sangjoo and using him as a shield. Yibo’s croaking laughter echoes through the courtyard.
“You don’t have to decide right now, you know,” Na-jie finally says.
Ah. They’re having this talk at last.
She usually leaves him be on these trips. Since it became clear he was more than fine in the company of Luoyang princes, she’s mostly been spending her time with Wang Han and other council members. Xiao Zhan privately thinks it’s kind of like a vacation for her now.
However it doesn’t mean Na-jie is blind or deaf. It’s not like he or Yibo have been particularly subtle.
“Don’t I? I think my parents would disagree with you.”
“They have their expectations, that’s true. This thing has been in the works since you were six. You’re twenty-three now, more than ready for marriage, at least where age is concerned,” Na-jie lays a hand on his shoulder to make him turn and look at her. “But Yibo is still plausibly young. If you’re not ready or if you need time to think, I can give it you. I’ll take care of it, with your parents and the king and queen here.”
“Really?” Xiao Zhan searches Na-jie’s face a little desperately, her offer almost too generous.
No one has demanded a decision yet, but Xiao Zhan knows the time is ticking.
Na-jie smiles. “Zhanzhan, I know you didn’t expect it to be like this. I’m sure it’s disorienting for you. It’s your life, you shouldn’t be pressured to make choices you aren’t ready to make.” She pats him on the shoulder. “Think about it.”
As she turns to go, Xiao Zhan calls to her.
“Wait, did you expect it to be like this?” he asks incredulously.
Na-jie glances at him over her shoulder. “After last time, in Chongqing, I thought it might turn out this way.”
Xiao Zhan stares after her.
The thing is, he has been thinking. He’s been thinking throughout seeing Yibo in the ocean of yellow flowers, throughout their endless push and pull these two months, throughout quiet days, and Seungyoun’s acceptance — not just of Xiao Zhan as a political husband to his twin, but of Xiao Zhan as someone who may now have the power to hurt Yibo on a very deep level — he’s been thinking throughout heated clash of his and Yibo’s swords, throughout Nan Hai and being able to bitch at Yibo and to give as good as he gets.
The closer the departure from Luoyang, the more thinking he’s been doing.
“Hey, Zhan-ge,” Yibo breaks Xiao Zhan out of his reverie, having finally noticed him, “check out these sleeves.”
Without further ado, the boy puts him under the barrage of hits of these ridiculous sleeves.
Xiao Zhan decides that chasing Yibo with a bug in retaliation — and getting all twisted up with Yibo’s huge hands on his wrists as a consequence — is much more fun than thinking. At least for now.
***
Xiao Zhan finds himself on a boat on the outskirts of palace grounds at an ungodly hour. He’d wonder how this happened, but it’s obviously Yibo’s fault. Everything, always, is Wang Yibo’s fault.
A shipment is scheduled to arrive today at dawn, and evidently it’s important enough to need a member of the royal family present. Usually such duties fall on one of the princes, and yesterday Yibo managed to draw a short straw.
For the life of him Xiao Zhan can’t tell how he got mixed up in all this. Yibo tried pouting and bargaining and outright bribing, and Xiao Zhan must’ve lost his mind, because here he is, on a boat, before the sun is even up. A second boat is nearby, full of people who’ll actually work on transferring the shipment.
“Wang Yibo,” he whines at the boy sitting opposite of him, “you always win at everything. How could you lose last night?”
“In a way, I did win. After all, I am sitting in the company of Xiao Zhan, the prince of Chongqing. That is such an honour, wouldn’t you say?” Yibo directs the question at the man sitting closer to the other end of the boat, the one in charge of this whole thing.
The man smiles awkwardly and nods.
Xiao Zhan snorts and complains to him, “Ah, laoshi, you see how he treats me? First he makes me get out of bed so early, then he drags me here, now he mocks me. How cruel your prince is!”
Now the man looks deeply uncomfortable, opens his mouth as if to say something, but gets cut off by Yibo.
“Laoshi, did you hear this? I make a sincere compliment, and he just slanders me! It’s because he’s older than me, you know, he thinks can bully me in this way,” Yibo says it all looking directly at the man.
“Do you have no shame?” Xiao Zhan yelps. “Who bullies who?”
Finally, the boy shifts his gaze towards Xiao Zhan, “You bully me!”
“Then how exactly did I end up here, if you didn’t bully me into coming with you?”
“… my lords, I’ll go check on my men, if you don’t mind…”
“How could I bully you, you’re my gege, my senior, I wouldn’t dare—”
“Oh, now I’m suddenly your senior?”
“If I ever acted as if you were not my senior, it’s on me, I apologise, after all you’re my guest and I should treat you with proper respect.”
“No, wait, I’m the one who should be sorry, you’ve been so welcoming, and I’m just complaining, so rude—”
“No, it is me who’s wron—”
“No, shut up, it’s me!”
“Zhan-ge, now you’re definitely bullying me.”
“Yeah, I am. So what?” Xiao Zhan raises his chin and looks at the boy in challenge.
“Ah, laoshi, did you see that?” Yibo triumphantly turns to the man only to find him gone. “Where did he go?”
They look around and see him on the other boat with the rest of the men.
“Wow, you drove him away, are you happy?” Xiao Zhan slouches in his seat, half-glaring at Yibo.
“Me?” The boy makes a face at him. “You started it.”
“You started it.”
“You started it, ge.”
“You.”
“You.”
“You.”
“You started it.”
“It really is you.”
“Ge, you started it.”
“Wang Yibo, it’s so early,” Xiao Zhan groans, “how do you have the energy for this?” He slouches even further and kicks Yibo.
Except it’s Yibo, so of course he latches onto Xiao Zhan’s foot with both of his and refuses to budge no matter how Xiao Zhan struggles against the hold. Albeit, it isn’t much of struggle, since he’s still half-sprawled in his seat, too lazy to move around.
Finally, Xiao Zhan surrenders, “Okay, okay, I give up! Have mercy, Bo-ge.”
Yibo smirks and loosens his hold. Xiao Zhan kicks him lightly again, just because he can, just because he knows Yibo will let him get away with it, and then rests his foot in between Yibo’s again. Satisfied, he lays his head against the boat’s wall.
“Zhan-ge, are you really that tired?” Yibo asks quietly, in stark contrast with how loud they’ve been the last few minutes. “Did you not sleep well?”
“Yeah, I was dreaming about our book, kept waking up with that dizi and guqin duet in my head,” he admits and then asks, “do you ever dream about it?”
“Yeah, once or twice over the years,” Yibo shrugs. “I remember one time I saved him before he even set foot on that cliff.”
“That’s nice,” Xiao Zhan smiles.
He doesn’t remember his own dream, just flashes of red and black here and there, but Yibo would be the one to dream of actually saving the doomed man, he thinks fondly.
He realises he’s been zoning out on Yibo’s face when the boy squeezes his foot, still resting in between Yibo’s, to get his attention.
“Zhan-ge, you know you didn’t actually have to come with me, right?”
Xiao Zhan taps Yibo’s calf with the nose of his boot in return. “Yeah. But it’s not so bad, look, the sun is rising.”
It is. It’s already visible on the horizon, and the sky is more pink and violet now than dark blue.
“It’s not long now, the shipment should be here soon.”
Xiao Zhan nods and they go back to watching the sunrise.
Neither of them move their feet.
***
Endless rolling hills surround them in all directions. It’s fantastically green, verdant and bright, even more so with the sky stretching wide and blue. The scenery is so breathtakingly beautiful Xiao Zhan would like to stop and sketch this, but there’s really no time if they want to reach Chongqing within the appointed date.
Yibo’s volunteered to see him off up to a certain point, although where exactly that point is Xiao Zhan isn’t sure. He doesn’t ask, just lets Na-jie and the guards go ahead, him and Yibo trailing behind. They aren’t even riding horses, instead leading the animals by reigns. He knows walking like this and putting off the inevitable is ridiculous, but can’t make himself let go just yet.
They stopped talking a while ago, and now the silence is half comfortable, like it always is with Yibo, half strained thanks to unavoidable parting.
Yibo starts humming. It’s vague at first, but grows into a full song with lyrics Xiao Zhan actually recognises. He’s confused for a moment, until Yibo points to a distant windmill among the hills. It makes Xiao Zhan smile and then join in, just in time for the chorus.
They sound nice together.
When they finish, Xiao Zhan has to swallow a few times before he can speak.
“I’ve known this song for as long as I can remember, but I could never understand why white windmills. Where would anyone even find them?”
Yibo makes a considering noise. “I’ve never thought about it before. I don’t know, maybe someone would paint them?”
“That’d be such a waste!” Xiao Zhan shakes his head. “It’s weird. Probably more of a metaphorical thing.”
“Probably,” Yibo agrees and finally stops.
Xiao Zhan does as well.
There’s no mistaking the way Yibo is looking at him right now, has been looking these past two months. Xiao Zhan can’t deny it or plead ignorance, especially since he’s been looking back every single time.
Truthfully, if it was just about the two of them, Xiao Zhan would probably be on him within a week of arriving in Luoyang.
But it’s never been just about them, has it? First and foremost, it about the relationship between Chongqing and Luoyang, about peace and cultural exchange, and support against common enemies. It’s about duty.
Xiao Zhan was prepared to carry it out well, with dignity and maybe some degree of satisfaction. The arranged visits along the years had let him get to know and respect Yibo, even love him in some sense. Xiao Zhan was convinced they would make good partners and bear responsibility together well enough. That’s what he thought getting ready for this visit.
He was not prepared for what met him in that canola field two months ago. For the way his blood would sing at Yibo’s heated gaze, for the understanding and maturity in Yibo's eyes, for the incessant need to be close — and closer still — and never getting tired of this one person’s company, no matter the mood, the weather, or anything else, really.
Except. What if it’s just a brief infatuation? Xiao Zhan is no stranger to affairs or crushes. Sure, it’s never been exactly like this, but can they afford the risk? If they rush into this and it doesn’t work out, blows up in their faces after a short period of bliss, how would they continue to coexist as a unified front? Would Xiao Zhan really want something like this instead of a steady, rational partnership?
He’s been thinking and thinking and thinking, but couldn’t find a way to silence these concerns.
Hence this moment of parting, even though every cell in Xiao Zhan’s body is screaming at him to stay right here.
Yibo is the first to break the silence.
“Zhan-ge,” he starts hesitantly, “let’s not wait two years.”
Fuck. If Yibo openly asks right now, Xiao Zhan is not at all sure he has enough willpower to refuse.
“There’s going to be a big celebration next year for mine and Seungyoun’s birthday. We’re skipping it this August, since we’ve only just came back, but Da-laoshi is already fantasising about making a big deal out it next time,” he smiles ruefully, though with a certain degree of satisfaction, and continues. “You should come.”
Oh. It’s not—
Xiao Zhan doesn’t know if he’s relieved or disappointed.
But it’s not an unreasonable suggestion. A year is enough to cool off and come to a decision with a clear head.
“You just want more presents, don’t you?” he makes a show of squinting suspiciously at the boy.
“There’s no deceiving Xiao-laoshi, he’s so wise!” Yibo grins. “I expect my weight in gold, no less.”
“Then there’ll be nothing left for Seungyoun, how is that fair?”
“He can deal with it.”
“Such a loving twin you are,” Xiao Zhan snorts. “I’ll have to think about the gold, but yeah, okay, let’s do it.”
“Okay,” Yibo’s whole face lights up, and Xiao Zhan has to make a conscious effort to not reach for him. “Well, I should head back now, I think it’s far enough.”
“Alright.”
Neither of them moves.
“Well? Aren’t you going?”
“I am.”
He stays still.
Xiao Zhan can’t take it. He closes the distance between them and hugs Yibo. The boy is solid and warm, and when his arms wrap around Xiao Zhan’s waist, their grip is tight and sure.
“Zhan-ge,” he murmurs quietly into Xiao Zhan’s shoulder.
“I know, I know.” Xiao Zhan turns his head slightly and lets himself press a soft kiss to Yibo’s neck. It lasts only half a second, there and gone, but it’s something. “Give me a year. If by then it’s still…”
He doesn’t finish because Yibo chooses this moment to draw back.
“Zhan-ge, it’s fine if you need time to be sure, you know I don’t mind.”
Xiao Zhan can’t help but ask, “Don’t you need time to be sure?”
“No.”
There’s no hesitation. Yibo’s face is serious and calm, like he’s come to a decision and no force in the universe can move him now.
Xiao Zhan has never been more attracted to anyone in his life.
He closes his eyes for a long moment. Then, “You’re the worst, Yibo-ge.”
Yibo’s grin splits his entire face. “Wow, dissing me even at this highly emotional moment, so rude.”
Xiao Zhan snorts and slaps his shoulder. “Fucking go already, or we’re gonna be here all day.”
Laughing, Yibo gets on his horse. “See you next time, Zhan-ge.”
Xiao Zhan raises his arm in farewell. “See you next time.”
8
“Hi, Yibo!
In case a rider from Chongqing is not enough to clue you in, the parcel is from me. I’m still working on that pile of gold for your next birthday, so I’m sending you something a little simpler this year. I’ve been painting it for a whole month, and I’ve only been back home for two, so you better appreciate it.
There’s also a new scabbard for Seungyoun, he’s been complaining about his own for weeks while I was in Luoyang. I hope I’m not too late.
Okay, that’s about it.
Have a good birthday, don’t forget to make a wish!
I’ll make one for you too.”
“What the fuck, Zhan-ge, you made this in a month? It’s so cool! I thought about hanging it in my rooms, but this is too good to just hoard, so we placed it in the main hall. It’s a scenery of Luoyang so it’s fitting anyway. Mom and dad are absolutely in love with it.
I may have bragged about it a little too much in front of a foreign delegation, you may get a few commissions in the future. But you’re so talented, what what was I supposed to do?
Seungyoun loves the scabbard you sent him. Full disclosure: he’s been gifted another one, but he only uses yours. He’s got taste, I’m not ashamed to call him my twin.
Just so you know, it’s been a perfectly normal summer, no sudden heatwaves or anything. I guess it really was just you. "
“… yeah, it fucking figures it’s hot as balls in Chongqing right now. Maybe you’re right, maybe it is me. I was put on this earth to suffer, Bo-ge, that’s the only explanation. This aside, even if it’s not as hot in Luoyang, remember to drink enough water or tea, okay? …"
“… and then he went and tried to seduce Bouboo away from me! Can you fucking believe it? And I called Yixing-ge my friend, that fucking traitor. I promised him a war with He Xing Wu Qi, and he had the gall to go all ‘I had to try, Yibo. Look at the bright side, now you know how loyal he is to you’. As if I don’t know Bouboo is the best, what a joke. Yixing-ge is going to Chongqing next. Who knows, maybe he’ll try to stealthily marry you. I mean, he’s a great guy (treachery aside) but not great enough for you, so don’t go for it, Zhan-ge …”
“… really is a great guy. I’ve been hearing about him for ages, from all of you, I’m so glad to actually meet him. He’s got interesting ideas, we’ve been thinking of ways to maybe set up a dialog between our kingdoms, and others later on, make some sort of cultural exchange. I don’t know, sometimes I think I’ve been in one place for too long, haven’t seen much of the world beyond my own kingdom. Well, yours too, I suppose …”
“… know what you mean. I visited a lot of remote places during those two years, it was eye-opening. I think I’ll get restless if I stay too long in Luoyang without doing anything else. Don’t get me wrong, it’s home, and I missed it while I was gone, but I don’t want to be here all the time. I want to fight when there’s need for it and train my soldiers, but I also want to travel, learn and try new things. I don’t see why I can’t or shouldn’t, as long as it doesn’t go against my duty as a prince. It’s something to think about, anyway …”
“Wang Yibo! Are you human? This is insane! How did you even swing it? There are so many books, all of them are exclusive to Luoyang, aren’t they? What did you do? Did you make up an entire team to copy them? How long did it take? I’m honestly kinda greedy right now and don’t want to redistribute them to the public. I mean, of course I won’t keep them for myself, they are meant to be shared, but …”
“… not that big a deal. Happy birthday, Zhan-ge, I’m glad you liked my present, even though the one book that matters the most wasn’t in there. Still, Han-ge said it’s a worthwhile idea and helped a lot. He says hi, by the way …”
“… Peng Chuyue came to visit. We had been super close as children, but he moved away. I was inconsolable for weeks. We kept in touch, but actually seeing him in person is completely different. I’m so relieved to know some relationships don’t just fade away despite the distance …”
“… already snowing in here. I was busy with Tian Tian Xiang Shang, and when I came out there was a whole-ass snowman in my robes. Still don’t know which of my idiot brothers did this. They all told me they just missed me too much …”
“… never get snow in Chongqing. I should’ve visited you in winter one of those times, don’t know why I never thought of it. You’re probably the worst during snowball fights, with how competitive you are. But I’d just bribe Seungyoun and we’d bury you in snow, I bet we could manage it…”
“… Happy New Year, Zhan-ge! Let’s make it a good one, hm? I bet your lantern is hand-painted, it’s probably super pretty. I had a go at mine, but it turned out kinda sloppy. But Xuan-ge said it’s still better than Wenhan’s so that’s a win in my book …”
“… and then Lulu went and fucking destroyed that shithead and every single argument he had, so the new year started with a bang, as you can imagine. I did do my own lantern, though it wasn’t anything too fancy. If you want, I can do yours next year. I mean, even if I’m not there. I can just prepare it beforehand …”
“… a new bunch of trainees. They work hard, but they are so green. It’s hard to imagine we were like that once. Still, it’s exciting, it’s exactly what I should do as one of the captains, and I’m proud to see their progress …”
“… Jianguo has been especially clingy lately. Pretty sure you'd love it, you two would just laze around cuddling all day. Not that I’d blame you too much, it’s been raining a lot now that spring is here, and the days kind of blur together …”
“… a giant bug was chasing me. It was the size of a horse, I swear. I woke up terrified and had to do my breathing exercises. You’re probably laughing at me right about now, but screw you, that thing was truly disgusting…”
“… like I couldn’t move at all. Everything around me was happening so fast, and I couldn’t do a damn thing. Just. Total helplessness. Eventually everyone forgot about me and I was just left there, unable to say anything or touch anyone, unable to even be seen. It was probably the scariest dream I’ve ever had. Wanna trade your bug thing for whatever the hell this was? Oh, it reminds me, your horse-sized bug got me all inspired, so I’m attaching a little drawing, you are sure to like it …”
“… the worst. I’m gonna do the most realistic carving of a snake, paint it, and then put it in your room so you can see it in the middle of the night, when it’s dark. Let’s see how you like it, asshole …”
“… wouldn’t do this to me, right, Bo-ge? I have faith in you, so just don’t, okay? Okay. It’s probably getting warm in Luoyang too, so go out for a swim, take a walk, let go of your grudges. It’s not healthy to keep them, you know? …”
“… Zhan-ge, this is ridiculous. They’ve planned so many things for our birthday. If it was up to me, I’d just celebrate with you and my family, but now I have to go make a public appearance. I get that this a celebration for the whole kingdom, a chance to ‘be merry’ or whatever Da-laoshi says, but still. Hurry up and get here already! I’m gonna hit you all the time to feel better about all this, and you’ll have to let me, it’s my birthday …”
“… completely shameless. Keep talking like that and see if I even go to Luoyang! It’d be a shame for you, ‘cause Haikuan and Ji Li tasked me with delivering their presents to you. Why am I just finding out that you are still in touch? Alright, in any case, I’m setting out in two weeks, so I’m gonna see you soon. Don’t stress out too much in the meantime.”
9
A private dining hall meant for the members of Luoyang’s royal family is empty, which is not surprising at all: it’s still barely dawn. Xiao Zhan is a regular enough guest to both not warrant panic with his earlier-than-expected arrival and be shown to this hall without any questions.
He was supposed to get to the palace in the evening, but made good time yesterday and decided to push through the night instead of stopping. Upon arrival his entourage, Na-jie included, was too beat and begged off to go to sleep, but he was too jittery for that. Hence the early breakfast.
The servants haven’t even brought the food yet when he hears hurried footsteps outside, like someone is running. The door is forcefully slid open, and then there’s Yibo, slightly out breath, frozen on the doorstep.
“You’re early. Again.”
“Yeah,” Xiao Zhan nods and gets up. “Couldn’t wait to smack you for the bullshit you spewed in that last letter.”
Yibo’s grin is wide with glee as he moves forward, and then they’re hugging. Xiao Zhan doesn’t remember making a single step, but he’s wrapped tightly in Yibo’s arms, his own clutching the boy with full force.
Xiao Zhan’s heart is jack-rabbiting so fast Yibo must be able to feel it with how close they’re pressed.
“Hi,” he smiles helplessly into Yibo’s shoulder.
In response, Yibo makes a vague sound and burrows into him even further.
Okay.
Okay, fine.
***
Of course, anything fine has to wait until after the celebration. Everyone’s eyes are on the twins right now, and any change would be immediately noticed. Xiao Zhan is not sure he’s ready for the thing between them to be shared with the public quite yet. And anyway Da-laoshi has put a lot of effort into this holiday, and Xiao Zhan wouldn’t want to ruin his hard work with any big news.
There’s still a week before that.
On Sunday, almost nine years after Yibo first asked, Xiao Zhan finally goes to Tian Tian Xiang Shang with him.
Ostensibly, they are there to talk about the cultural changes Xiao Zhan’s been trying — mostly successfully — to implement in Chongqing these past few years. And they do talk about making art a bigger part of everyone’s life here too, that much is true.
But their conversation gets derailed every few minutes.
“Speaking of music, it’s such wonderful love language!” Da Zhangwei interjects, apropos of nothing. “Say, Xiao Zhan, what song would you use to confess your feelings to someone?”
Xiao Zhan doesn’t snort at the man’s stunningly unsubtle ways, but just barely.
Still, these people are basically Yibo’s family, and that’s that. He sings the first song that comes to mind, a popular classic often played at festivals.
“Nice choice!” Da Zhangwei nods approvingly and oohs and aahs about Xiao Zhan’s voice.
“It’s wonderful that you can paint. We all loved the work you sent Yibo for his last birthday,” Wang Han says next time their conversation gets off track. “I’m more of calligraphy man myself, but I always appreciate others’ talent. Would you choose to be an artist if you weren’t a prince?”
His face is kind and open, but there’s a sly look in his eyes and a weird quirk to his mouth. Xiao Zhan is definitely being tested, which throws him off a little bit, because he knows for certain Wang Han already likes him.
From the corner of his eye, Xiao Zhan can see Yibo covering his face with both hands.
Wang Han never does anything without a reason. If he wants to gauge Xiao Zhan’s worth, who is Xiao Zhan to refuse? After all, the man is almost like a second father to Yibo.
“Actually, I don’t see why I can’t be an artist now,” Xiao Zhan straightens up and meets Wang Han’s gaze head on. “I may be not as versatile as Yibo, but there’s no reason to hold back and not do the things I want. Sometimes I paint, and other times I participate in archery contests. I also like music and want to share it with other people. As a prince I have an opportunity to spread good things, it is both my pleasure and my duty.”
He pauses, not sure what exactly Wang Han needs to hear to come to the conclusions Xiao Zhan wants him to. In the end, it doesn’t matter at all, since the only thing Xiao Zhan wants to do is be honest.
“It’s no use to imagine what I’d do if I weren’t a prince,” he continues calmly. “I wouldn’t be the same person, my interests and capabilities would be very different. After all, our character is a combination of our genes, upbringing and experiences. It’s no use to guess and wonder about what ifs. All we can do is try to live well, improve and become better, step by step, day by day. Tian Tian Xiang Shang, if you will.”
Wang Han laughs at this, as appreciative of the pun as Xiao Zhan thought he would be.
“Alright, that’s fair,” he says then, eyes too serious on a face full of mirth. “I agree with you. My only advice is to not take too long to do the things you want.”
“Noted,” Xiao Zhan answers over a mortified sound that escapes Yibo just then.
Evidently satisfied by now, they mostly move on from trying to make him squirm.
Instead, they switch to Yibo. They tell Xiao Zhan about the time he was six and wanted to ride a tiger for some reason. And how once for Wang Han’s birthday he wanted to cook a special dish and tried making smashed cucumber, but added so much vinegar it was basically inedible. And how when he was seventeen a small boy approached him in the town and called him ‘so beautiful’.
“Bobo was really grumpy about it, but tried so hard not to show it,” Qian Feng giggles.
“‘Cause it was embarrassing! There was a whole crowd around us!” Yibo protests.
“He wasn’t wrong though?” Xiao Zhan makes a show of thinking about it. “You do have fine features. Such a small face, too.”
“Ge…” Yibo sounds half-whiny, half-menacing.
The menacing part wins, and they have a brief scuffle, which ends with Yibo grabbing Xiao Zhan’s wrist under the table to prevent him from jabbing Yibo’s knee.
“Alright, alright, mercy, Bo-ge,” Xiao Zhan capitulates, mostly because they have an audience, and someone has to remember about it.
Yibo smirks, satisfied, and loosens his grip on Xiao Zhan’s wrist, but doesn’t let go completely for a good half an hour after that.
All in all, it’s a productive meeting, as far as Xiao Zhan is concerned. Among all the teasing they actually do come up with good ideas, and he starts seriously thinking about traveling after all this is over.
Xiao Zhan doesn’t know what exactly was Wang Han and the others’ purpose: to test him, or to find out if he’s ready for Yibo, or if he even deserves him. Still, it feels good to get their sort-of-approval, just like it did with Seungyoun a year ago.
It feels like another task accomplished, another bridge crossed, another step taken in the right direction.
He doesn’t plan to go travelling alone, after all.
***
Four days before the big event Yibo and Seungyoun have to do the last fitting for their splendid ceremonial robes.
“Seriously, do they have to be so,” Xiao Zhan waves at the robes the twins are trying on, “elaborate?”
“Xiao Zhan!” Seungyoun gasps theatrically. “Luoyang’s youngest sons are all grown up, isn’t it a cause for celebration? Aren’t we supposed to give people joy and happiness? Surely our exquisitely fine looks gonna do the trick, don’t you think so?”
He strikes a pose, half ridiculous, half actually majestic. Yibo leans on him and does the same.
“Yeah, Zhan-ge, don’t you think so?”
“Wow,” Xiao Zhan shakes his head, in awe of their narcissism, “you really are the leo twins.”
Yibo breaks his pose and bounces to Xiao Zhan’s side.
“We are, now tell us we’re handsome!” He hits Xiao Zhan with a long flowing sleeve.
Ignoring it, Xiao Zhan stretches into his full height and looks down on Yibo. “And if I don’t?”
Yibo seems to enjoy their height difference just as much and steps even closer. It’s probably meant to be a challenge.
Joke’s on him, that’s exactly where Xiao Zhan wants him.
“Then I’ll just have to say how handsome Xiao-laoshi is instead, over and over and over again.”
“Are we starting, Wang-laoshi?”
“I don’t know, are we?”
Xiao Zhan looks him up and down. Yibo’s cocky smirk, his hooded eyes and general proximity are fun, but before Xiao Zhan can say anything else, there’s a shout from another side of the room.
“Please tell me you’re done?” Seungyoun yells.
Xiao Zhan turns to look at him and bursts into laughter. Seungyoun’s eyes are shut tight and he’s covering his ears with both hands, like he actually expects them to be making out right now or something. Not that Xiao Zhan can blame him, the thought is never too far away from his own mind these days.
He elbows Yibo and stealthily makes his way towards Seungyoun. Once sure the boy is unaware of his presence, Xiao Zhan gives him a smacking kiss on the cheek. Seungyoun opens his eyes, flails and sputters.
“Now we’re done,” Xiao Zhan says smugly. “And yeah, okay, I’ll admit it, you do indeed look ‘exquisitely fine’. Are you happy?”
Seungyoun shakes a fist at him, not really flailing anymore, obviously trying to stifle his giggles now.
Yibo does not have the same problem. His croaking laughter reaches Xiao Zhan across the room and makes him all disgustingly warm inside.
Go figure.
***
A day before the big celebration Xiao Zhan wakes up to find Yibo gone.
“What do you me, gone?” he asks incredulously.
“He got a message early last evening and set out immediately for some village nearby, I don’t know, I didn’t get the details,” Sangjoo shrugs.
“I thought he was just busy with preparations. Did something happen? Was he okay?”
“It’s fine, he said he’ll be back today, maybe tomorrow morning.”
“But did he say what the message was about?” Xiao Zhan frowns. For Yibo to just abandon everything and go, it must’ve been immensely important.
“No, but I don’t think it was anything bad, relax. Let’s just wait and see.”
Sangjoo doesn’t seem to be worried, so, reluctantly, Xiao Zhan lets it go.
He doesn’t mope that day, no matter what Wenhan, or Xiao Ji, or Na-jie, or Da-laoshi say. He doesn’t, because it’s only one day, and moping would be ridiculous.
Still, Xiao Zhan perks up when Yibo comes back next morning. He cuts it really close too, only an hour before the twins have to set out for their outing in the city.
“What the hell was so urgent?” Xiao Zhan asks as soon as Yibo jumps from the horse.
“Missed me?” the boy breaks out his gremlin grin.
“You wish,” Xiao Zhan says with an eye roll. “Seriously, is everything alright?”
At this, Yibo sobers up a little and comes closer. “Zhan-ge,” he starts, but then looks around at all the people bustling around. Someone’s coming straight at them, presumably to wisk Yibo away to get him ready. “Later, okay?”
All Xiao Zhan can do is nod helplessly. He knows how these things go, he’s not a stranger to being the centre of a huge celebration.
The twins go to the city for half a day. The people of Luoyang love them, so it’s been decided going to greet them is necessary, a full-on parade that ends with a big stage show. After that there’s a long — and Xiao Zhan means long — official banquet, full of toasting and well-wishing, and toasting again. Then come the fireworks and finally a much less official party the twins actually asked for themselves.
Throughout it all, Xiao Zhan barely has enough time alone with Yibo to give him a gift, but that’s fine. Seeing him and Seungyoun surrounded by so many friends, loved and adored, is fun in its own right.
Late into the party, when most people are too drunk to notice or mind, Yibo grabs Xiao Zhan and makes his escape.
“Finally tired of being the centre of attention?” Xiao Zhan mocks as they climb the roof of one of the buildings in the inner courtyard.
“I’m still gonna be the centre of your attention, so no,” Yibo says with a satisfied smirk. He’s remarkably sober, but then again, this day mostly belonged to the prince of Luoyang, not Yibo himself.
“What a thick face you have, Wang Yibo.”
They choose a place to sit down, and remain quiet for a while. The sky is clear tonight, luminous stars surround them on all sides. Xiao Zhan is reminded of the last time they sat on a roof like this, back in Chongqing.
It seems so long ago. Yibo was mostly a child, only fifteen at the time. Here he is now, in all his twenty-one year old glory. Still young, still with some growing up to do, but tall, and proud, and mature, probably beyond his years. He’s experienced, hardened, accomplished, and so, so beautiful on this night, in his white ceremonial clothes, with stars crowning his head and the moon shining on his fair face.
Xiao Zhan is different too. Everything else aside, he doesn’t remember this liquid warmth spreading through his veins while looking at the boy, or the lightness in his heart, or the utter contentment of just sitting together.
He must’ve loved Yibo even back then, just differently, didn’t see him yet the way he does now.
“Zhan-ge,” Yibo breaks the silence, “I want a present.”
“I already gave you a present!” Xiao Zhan protests indignantly.
Yibo grins and takes out his new ox-head necklace from under his clothes. Xiao Zhan had gone to the main temple in Chongqing to bless it, and then to the one in Luoyang on his way to the palace. Whether it will work or not, Xiao Zhan can’t tell, but he feels better knowing Yibo has something that might protect him. He even promised Xiao Zhan to never take it off.
“I know, and I love it. It’s even better than my weight in gold,” Yibo strokes the horns of the ox and lets it hang on his chest. “But I want another present.”
“What are you, a spoiled princeling? You’re not supposed to get more than one from each person,” Xiao Zhan shoves the boy's shoulder, shaking his head in disbelief. “What is it?”
“Remember how you sang Kepler to me in Chongqing?” That’s not where he thought Yibo was going with this, but it’s nice to know Xiao Zhan is not the only one remembering that night. “I wanna hear it again.”
Xiao Zhan raises his eyebrows. “That’s the present you want?”
“Yep.”
Xiao Zhan shrugs, looks up at the night sky.
He sings.
He sings about warm galaxies, and dazzling radiance, and loving a lonely star.
Xiao Zhan isn’t sure if Yibo remembers the song well enough to notice the changes, but when he turns to meet his gaze, Yibo’s eyes are soft and his smile is more brilliant than the entire sky full of stars.
Never in his life Xiao Zhan thought that a single person could make him so happy.
Before he can do anything about it, Yibo breaks the moment and says, “I have something for you.”
“You want to give me something on your birthday? You really don’t get how presents work, do you?”
“You’re gonna regret being a smartass in a minute.”
Yibo produces something from the folds of his hanfu and hands it to Xiao Zhan.
It’s a book with a simple black cover.
Xiao Zhan’s heart is suddenly in his throat.
“Is that…”
“It is.”
He traces the cover with reverent fingertips. It looks so simple and unassuming for something so precious. It could probably be read in a day, give or take.
Xiao Zhan has been waiting and searching for so long.
“How—” his voice breaks, just a little. He can’t take his eyes off the book long enough to look at Yibo. “How did you find it?”
“In those two years I was away, I met a woman, Yang Xia. We got talking, turned out she loved our book too. She’s in publishing business, so she promised to tell me if she gets any news. Well, she did get them. Zhan-ge, we couldn’t find it all these years because it didn’t exist yet. This copy,” Yibo gestures to the book Xiao Zhan is clutching, “is one of the first ones. It should be available to people soon. I actually think we could do something to help produce more copies and make it accessible to more people.”
Xiao Zhan knows Yibo’s explaining things, about Yang Xia sending the book to her friend in a nearby village, thinking it would be safer with of all the birthday madness and the additional safety measures in the palace.
“… was right not to send it directly to the palace, it might’ve gotten lost, considering how messy the last few days have been. I don’t think they expected me to come personally though, they were very surprised.”
He hears it all, but his brain is still stuck on the fact that he’s holding the continuation of their story.
He remembers crying in the library at thirteen, moved beyond anything he’s experienced before. Remembers Yibo’s large eyes as he raged about the unfairness of such a tragic ending, the conviction on his face as he declared there must be more.
And he was right. There is more. After years of searching there’s finally more.
Xiao Zhan smiles shakily. Yibo got the news the day before yesterday and did not hesitate to abandon everything to go for it immediately.
Wait.
“Wait,” he says and finally looks at Yibo. “You went there early in the evening, right?”
“Yeah,” the boy answers reluctantly and fidgets, as if he knows where Xiao Zhan is going with this, the bastard.
“And you probably reached the village that same evening?”
Yibo nods.
“So why did you come back a whole day later? Wang Yibo! Did you read it without me?!” Xiao Zhan hits him.
“I’m sorry!” Yibo cries, not even trying to hide his guilt. “I was wrong, Zhan-ge, I was wrong! It was very late, and raining, so I decided to just spend the night at an inn and set out in the morning. But I couldn’t sleep, and the book was right there, what was I supposed to do? And then I couldn’t just stop, right? So I kinda… stayed at the inn reading the whole day. I wanted to give you the book as soon as I got back, but there was no time!”
“This is called treachery, Yibo!” Xiao Zhan delivers the last hit and finally stops.
“But I got you the book, didn’t I?”
“Okay fine, you did. Still, you’re on thin ice.”
“So ungrateful, Zhan-ge.” Yibo murmurs and hides a smile at Xiao Zhan raising a fist threateningly.
All joking aside, he can’t blame Yibo. He’d probably do the exact same thing. After all, the man from the book died in the first part, and here, in Xiao Zhan’s hands, is his story’s true ending. Xiao Zhan hopes it’s the ending the man deserves.
“Does he make it?” Xiao Zhan asks, half-afraid to hear the answer.
Yibo studies his face for a long moment. Then, “Zhan-ge, you’ve been waiting for this for twelve years. Do you really want me to tell you instead of finding out yourself?”
“Okay, that’s fair.” After a moment, he grins and pokes the boy’s arm. “Yibo-ge, you found it.”
“I did.”
Yibo’s answering smile is somehow both sweet and smug, and Xiao Zhan can’t decide what he wants to do more: to finally kiss him or start reading the book.
“Oh my god, stop looking at me like that, I can’t take!” Yibo gets on his feet and offers Xiao Zhan a hand. “Go read it already.”
Freed from making a decision, Xiao Zhan takes his hand and stands up.
He can’t fucking wait.
***
Xiao Zhan bangs on the door.
There’s no answer.
He does it again.
It’s dark and empty outside, but beyond that he has no idea what time it is.
Finally, there are shuffling footsteps and the door slides open to reveal Yibo’s sleepy face.
“Zhan-ge? What the—”
“He made it,” Xiao Zhan croaks, throat still constricted by the tears he’s spilled.
“Oh. You finished it.”
Indeed he did. He’s vaguely aware of a night, and then a day, and then probably half of another night passing. He caught a few hours of sleep that night after Yibo’s birthday, but other than that, he’s been reading the whole time.
Yibo rubs his eyes, still waking up, but ushers Xiao Zhan inside, sits him down on the floor by the bed and gets him some water.
Xiao Zhan takes a sip, but then has to put the glass down and wipe a few stray tears.
He feels delirious, absolutely wrung and wrecked emotionally, but also lit up from inside.
Twelve years of waiting — absolutely, undeniably worth it.
He made it. The man from the book made it.
Xiao Zhan laughs. He can’t stop smiling.
“When they went their separate ways in the end, I thought I would actually, for real, go crazy,” he starts.
Yibo sits down beside him and chuckles, “I know, I kinda, uh, broke a table when I got to that part.”
“All of it would be meaningless if they weren’t together at the end. Nothing at all would even matter, none of the sacrifices, or the hopes, or anything. It wasn’t his story, not really, not completely. It was their story all along.”
Xiao Zhan pauses for a moment and closes his eyes to stop new tears from coming.
“Back then, you were so angry that he was all alone in this. But he wasn’t. He just felt that way. The circumstances and his own choices made him feel so painfully lonely, and we only saw what he did at the time. But he was never alone, he was always loved. So fiercely. Yibo. He was loved so much. Those sixteen years are the cruelest thing in the book. How… how do you even wait for sixteen years, without any real hope, without anything?”
Xiao Zhan takes another sip of water. Now that he’s started, it’s hard to stop talking.
“If they ended up separated, I think I would’ve lost it. That last scene. Yibo,” he doesn’t even know what he wants, why he calls to him, but Yibo wordlessly reaches out and takes his hand. Xiao Zhan grips it tight and lets it anchor him. “He turns around, and it’s all worth it. The deaths, and the suffering, and the loss, and the pain. He went through so much. He went through everything, but he turned around and smiled. So simple. Yibo,” he squeezes the boy’s hand, “if he can smile like that, after everything, then we can do anything.”
He’s not sure he’s making any sense, but relief and excitement and pure joy of life are coursing through his veins and he can’t do anything about it. Something in him latched onto the man at thirteen and refused to let go for twelve years. Xiao Zhan feels him, feels his emotions just as acutely as we does his own.
To know that the man has managed to live through hate and suffering, and come out on the other side still smiling, still finding joy in the world that dragged him through dirt and blood. To know that the man is loved, accepted, understood. It’s precious.
After a while, Yibo interrupts his silent musings. “Do you remember that duet by Lin Hai? I had it in my head for half the book. In the end, I imagined that this is the melody he played on those cliffs.”
Yibo hums it just then, and Xiao Zhan smiles in response. “Yeah. It’s kinda perfect. The steadiness of guqin and the buoyant energy of dizi.”
Now that he's spoken his thoughts out loud, Xiao Zhan feels his exhaustion — emotional, obviously, and physical, from an almost sleepless night — growing. Still, it’s warm and light in his chest, like someone’s lit a lantern and left it there.
“Zhan-ge, why this story?” Yibo asks suddenly.
“What do you mean?”
“Why does this story mean so much to you? In all the time I’ve known you, I’ve seen you cry only three times, and it’s always because of this book, because of him.”
“What, you’re saying you don’t feel the same about it?” Xiao Zhan is weirdly offended by this thought. That can’t be right though, Yibo’s been searching for it this whole time too.
“No, I’m saying it’s much more simple in my case. I like it because I like it. It was true when I was nine and it is true now. But you usually need to think these things through.”
Huh. That’s true.
Xiao Zhan takes a minute to gather his thoughts. “I guess I just… admire him? I can read about heroes, or heroes turned villains, or any characters going through hardships and still staying strong in basically every and any book I open. But there’s never anyone like him. He didn’t just stay strong, he found a way to be happy in the Burial Mounds. He found a way to manage the darkness inside him and still smile. He woke up after sixteen years and chose to live, find joy in life. How did it go? ‘Born with a smiling face’, right?”
“Right,” Yibo nods. “That’s why the ending of the first part didn’t make sense at all. Such a person cannot be broken and lost, beyond anyone’s reach, not forever.”
“Yes, that’s it.” Xiao Zhan exhales, relieved to not be alone in this. “He’s always felt more than a character, even back then, and especially now. More like a friend, if that makes sense. It probably doesn’t.”
“It’s not like that for me, but I understand, Zhan-ge, I do.”
Xiao Zhan meets his eyes and smiles so wide that his eyes, swollen as they are, crinkle.
They sit there for a long time, Xiao Zhan slowly coming down from his emotional high, and Yibo keeping him company.
Eventually, his eyelids start drooping and Yibo calls it a day. He hoists Xiao Zhan up and forces him to get in the bed.
“You can sleep here tonight, it’s fine.”
“What about you?” Xiao Zhan protests, but lets Yibo cover him with a blanket.
“I’m won’t be able to fall asleep now. There are still a few hours until dawn, I’m gonna go practice before the sun is up and it gets too warm.”
“Oh. Um. Sorry for waking you up?” he mumbles into the pillow, half-asleep already.
Yibo snorts, “No you’re not. Sleep well, Zhan-ge.”
Xiao Zhan is out before he can agree or make any answering noise.
***
Xiao Zhan wakes up with a vision of a sunny smile before his eyes and the sound of dizi echoing in his ears.
It’s still dark outside, so he couldn’t have been out for more than a few hours. It’s not a lot of sleep, but he feels much more clear-headed.
Xiao Zhan’s gaze falls on the book, still on the table where he put it earlier. He gets out of bed, picks it up and opens the first page.
And there it is, in a startlingly red ink: chen qing ling.
Xiao Zhan traces the characters for what feels like a hundredth time. It still doesn’t feel quite real, that it exists, that Xiao Zhan gets to read it and finally know that the man from the book — both of them — got the ending he deserved. In other words, not an ending at all, but a chance to live, and live well.
He closes the book and carefully puts it back on the table.
Speaking of living well and explaining matters fully.
Xiao Zhan looks around the room. It’s neat and orderly, nothing like the clutter he has back home. There’s a low shelf with a few wooden carvings Yibo is especially fond of. A display of daggers he’s collected over the years. A few books scattered here and there. The unmade bed with green sheets. Xiao Zhan grins. Yibo is nothing if not loyal to the things he likes.
There, by the bed, pinned to the wall is a doodle of Jianguo Xiao Zhan gave him, what, eight years ago now?
Xiao Zhan swallows and looks at the book again. It’s important to take your time, figure out what you want, and if you are ready for what you want.
He’s already done all that. Now he’s tired of waiting for the right moment, of caring about immediate consequences, even of the delicious anticipation that’s been building up this whole week.
He never, ever wants to hear Yibo say see you next time.
With startling clarity Xiao Zhan knows he wants his own moment of turning around and coming home, in the truest sense of the word.
He wants to finally take what is already his.
It’s not exactly an epiphany. Instead, it’s a quiet certainty that’s been there for a while, and was brought into the light with a little external nudge. So there’s no sudden burning need to rush to Yibo as soon as possible. He takes his time to find a servant and take a bath, change his clothes and get a flask of tea.
He comes to the training grounds just as the sun is starting to rise. Even though the palace is already waking up, it’s still empty here, save for a lone figure practicing sword forms.
Xiao Zhan makes himself comfortable on a grassy slope that serves as a nice spot for viewing the training. He doesn’t have to wait long: Yibo notices him barely five minutes in.
“Zhan-ge,” he calls as he abandons the sword and jogs up to Xiao Zhan, “why are you up? It’s only been a few hours.”
“Woke up, couldn’t sleep anymore,” Xiao Zhan shrugs and hands him the tea. “Have you been here the whole time?”
“Nah, maybe an hour. Had to write a letter to Yang Xia first, go to the armoury, stuff like that.”
An hour is still quite a while with the kind of training Yibo usually puts himself through. Out of breath, brow glistening with sweat, he gratefully drinks the offered tea before sitting down.
“Thanks! Zhan-ge’s tea is, as usual, delicious and immensely helpful. I’m so glad he bestows this grace on me from time to ti—”
Xiao Zhan shoves him. “Keep talking and see if I ever share with you again, brat.”
Yibo gears up for a retort but Xiao Zhan shushes him with a hand over his mouth.
“No, no, by ‘keep talking’ I obviously mean ‘shut up’.”
Yibo furrows his brow, and Xiao Zhan’s gaze falls on a small mole between his nose and left eyebrow.
Not seeing any reason not to, since he’s so close already, Xiao Zhan kisses that mole, feather-light. It’s just a brief touch of lips, but Yibo’s face as Xiao Zhan shifts back is priceless.
He eyes the corner of Xiao Zhan’s mouth. “Does that mean I get to touch yours?”
Xiao Zhan laughs lightly. That’s his first reaction? “If you want.”
Yibo peers up at him, probably trying to decide if he’s serious. “Are we starting?”
“I guess we are,” he meets Yibo’s eyes and holds them. “Made you wait long enough, have I?”
“I don’t mind. Like I said, I know you need to think these things through very carefully.”
“Mn, that’s true,” he smirks and leans in just the tiniest bit. “Well?”
“Making me do all the work…” Yibo complains, but leans in the rest of the way and—
Huh. Okay.
Xiao Zhan has been kissed quite a lot, but in the face of this he thinks it might not even count.
He tries to move back after a bit to breathe, but Yibo only allows him a few seconds before diving back in.
Fuck. Should’ve known Yibo would be one to take a mile when given an inch.
Xiao Zhan puts a hand on his jaw, tilts Yibo’s head the way he wants.
They could’ve been doing this for years.
He bites Yibo’s lip, soothes it with with a swipe of his tongue, and the boy opens up to him beautifully. From then, it’s all heat that Xiao Zhan feels everywhere, from fingertips to toes.
Scratch that, they will be doing this for years.
Yibo slides his large hands on Xiao Zhan’s waist and squeezes. Xiao Zhan leans into it, grabs two fistfuls of Yibo’s hair and tugs. Yibo comes up for air with a voiceless groan.
What a picture he makes. Lips red, colour high on his cheeks, gaze direct, somehow both hungry and fond. Xiao Zhan kisses him one more time just for that look, and then laughs breathlessly.
“What?” Yibo huffs but lets him sit back.
He also takes Xiao Zhan’s hand, as if now that he’s officially been allowed to touch he refuses to stop.
Xiao Zhan exhales to cool himself down a little.
“It’s kinda funny. We were supposed to be in a normal arranged marriage, you know, be perfectly polite to each other’s faces but secretly resent each other and stuff. Now look at this,” Xiao Zhan raises their entwined hands and grimaces, “so sappy. I’m appalled.”
Yibo snorts. “Well, I guess we could roleplay it on our wedding night? I think I could be into angry sex.”
Fuck. Everything else aside, Xiao Zhan just likes him so much. So much.
“Nah, it’s too late for that, you ruined it,” he says with a very serious air. “Now I expect to be, like, cherished and adored my whole life, I won’t settle to anything less.”
“Deal,” Yibo agrees easily.
His smile is heart-shaped and so incandescently happy that Xiao Zhan has to close his eyes for a moment.
Later, there will be a huge mess they’ll have to deal with: people to tell, a long-awaited political wedding to go through.
Later, Yixuan and Sangjoo will honest to god cry about their baby brother decked out in all red. Lulu will admit she warned Yibo about the long wait years ago. A lot of money will exchange hands, because everyone they know is an asshole involved in a betting pool. Na-jie and Wang Han will publicly high-five each other. Wenhan and Seungyoun will make the most humiliating and hilarious toast in the history of time, but that same night Seungyoun will drunkenly, with feeling and some tears, proclaim Xiao Zhan to be the best brother-in-law anyone could wish for.
Later, they’ll visit Yang Xia and personally thank her and offer their services to make the book more accessible to public. They’ll make travel plans, think about where they want to go, what they want to do.
Now, though.
Now Yibo squeezes his hand, and Xiao Zhan opens his eyes.
“Zhan-ge, how about I start cherishing and adoring you right now, somewhere more private?”
Fucking gremlin.
“Wang Yibo, are you human?” he says in mock-indignation, but gets on his feet even faster than Yibo.
After all, Xiao Zhan himself is very much human, and it's been a long, long twelve years.