Spring Mating

by Elvent

Summary:

Russia and America are fighting in a world meeting. “They should just fuck. Perhaps they’ll be less inclined to destroy the world then. This is clearly unresolved sexual tension.”

The start of world meeting was uneventful enough, but the flimsy image of peace and tranquility was soon destroyed by the two regulars arguing and fighting. This one was bad enough the meeting was immediately called off.

“You will never have me, America, no matter how hard you try,” Russia seethed, long fingers clutching at America’s collar and pulling so hard the thick fabric threatened to rip.

With Russia this close to his neck it was as close to promise of murder as anyone could have seen, but America was nothing but unrelenting in the face of a dangerous adversary. His blue eyes glinted madly as he looked up into Russia’s face, licking his lips as if he was about to feast on the first delicious meal he had in a long time. “Well, but I already did — I fucked you throughout all the 90s. It was only a pity that it wasn’t continued.”

Hearing that, Russia let out so unhinged a roar that had everyone flinching as he rewrapped his fingers around America’s neck instead. “God help me, I will tear your head off your neck with my bare hands. Let’s see what will happen to your country then!!”

America grinned like a madman even as he was rendered unable to speak. Quickly he dislodged Russia’s footing, making the man’s larger body fall on him with a bang. The chair under them splintered with its pieces cutting into them, but they cared naught, nor would they care if the whole world lay in ruins as they fought. America’s face turned purple from the choking but he also had his hand pulling hard on Russia’s ever-present scarf, turning the fight between them into a mutual chokehold.

Germany stood nearby probably with brain aneurysm threatening to explode as he trembled in barely contained rage. The other Europeans either tried to shy away as if not wanting to be associated with the two uncivilized personifications, or facepalmed themselves so hard into apathy because they couldn’t do anything about it anyway. The Netherlands got himself high as per usual while England was one second away from excusing himself to have another round of tea. France as the host sighed in forced resignation as Russia and America ransacked his hotel, again.

Most of the Asians looked like they wanted even less to do with it. Japan tried very hard to emulate a wooden block and India was smiling but inching closer to the door with every minute. Kazakhstan was resting his chin on both hands with a depressed expression on his face while his brothers were cringing away. Indonesia looked like he wanted to eat some popcorn while watching the whole spectacle, as if it had nothing to do with him.

“What are those two toddlers doing?” China shouted with half irritated, half martyred look on his face. “It seems that once more I have to be the only adult in the room.”

“Can we just ship both of them to another galaxy or something?” Someone groaned. “Clearly they’re number one threat to world peace.”

“They should just fuck. Perhaps they’ll be less inclined to destroy the world then. This is clearly unresolved sexual tension.”

Another person complained. “Ugh, is the meeting postponed? We have an important agenda today…”

Germany whipped his head so fast his neck was cracking. “Finally a sane person here. The meeting is still on. If we have to do without those two, then we very well will!!”

China clapped his hands. “If the meeting was to be held in my place then this disaster wouldn’t have happened. Come. We’ll use the other meeting room I have so graciously prepared.”

Everyone quickly vacated the meeting room while Russia and America were destroying everything in their path. Russia had bodily slammed America onto one of the tables, which broke under their immense weight — and moaned loudly as they drove into each other’s mouths, biting and spreading blood all over. By the time the last person had walked out, they had ripped each other’s clothes off and humped into high heaven like it was the only thing they were rightly born for.

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 1 of Spring Mating