Work Text:
It was the middle of the night in the settlement, and a dream woke Nora from slumber between MacCready and Deacon warm in bed beside her.
She couldn’t immediately remember the dream as sleepy consciousness flowed slowly, and the warmth of the men on either side of her were a comfort soothing her back to sleep. Their breathing was even, relaxed, and she didn’t care that she couldn’t remember the dream that had woken her up, closing her eyes and relaxing between them. It didn’t matter, because:
She was safe.
Her pulse picked up just a bit of speed as knowledge of the dream came back; a reflection of her waking world that her conscious brain hadn’t yet named, but that which she was becoming more aware of the more she turned her attention on it:
The safety. The absolute safety she felt at all times between both men since the three of them had officially become a thing. More secure than she’d ever been consciously aware of before. The gravity of the relief of it all was very nearly painful.
She was facing Deacon, her cheek pressed close to his shoulder with his own at her temple. Nora’s eyes drank him in under this new awareness, a deep appreciation of everything he’d done and what he was to her. One of her hands was gently cupping the side of Deacon’s neck in her sleep, and the steady, strong thumping of his heart was reassuring in its own right.
Mac spooned her closely behind, a leg thrown over their own and an arm holding her snug under her shirt between her breasts. His forehead was bent into the middle of her back, and his breath was warm through the material of her night shirt. Even asleep, he held her close, curled into her body with his own.
They were both holding her possessively; protectively. Nora realized she felt safer than she’d possibly ever felt in her whole life, nestled there between her men. A mercenary on one side, a spy on the other, the repaired ruin of the house she’d always lived in around them, and a world of mutated, dangerous creatures outside.
Her heart raced on with her cresting thoughts as the realization was finally being comprehended in her mind, a name to something that had settled without her awareness.
None of this life was normal to her, yet despite it all, she felt safe. The contrast of what she once knew with her life now was making her blood run faster, and on some intellectual level, she realized it was fucked up and liberating to finally feel like this for the first time in her life.
They’d all been in fire fights together; watched one another’s backs. Killed to keep each other alive. MacCready and Deacon both were extremely capable of handling literally anything life threw their way, be it ordinance or raiders or whatever. The modern world of ‘safe suburban life’ she once knew was gone, and though Nora had adapted to this version fairly well in her own opinion, it was still a far cry from her ‘modern’ previous life.
Despite it all, she felt so safe. She knew she was safe. It was a matter of total, overwhelming fact. The idea was shaking her to her core, and she didn’t understand why her eyes were becoming moist.
Nora’s breath hitched a moment, and the sound instinctively jerked Deacon awake.
“…Nora…?”
She hugged him, and he sleepily pressed a kiss to the side of her lips and hugged her. Her breath steadied a bit, but was shaky as she clung.
She felt Mac stir behind her, and he stretched slightly before hooking the top of his foot over Deacon’s and Nora’s own. He pulled them possessively towards himself with a grunt in his sleep, the arm up Nora’s shirt holding her firmly against his chest while Deacon’s arm held her snug at the lower back. They were effectively holding her from head to toe, and it made her breath hitch yet again between them.
Deacon’s voice came soft again. “…What’s wrong, baby? Nightmare?”
She shook her head. Nothing was wrong, was the thing. It should be, but it wasn’t.
Mac’s lips intuitively pressed to her back with a sleepy hum. His beard scratched in an intimate sort of way where her shirt fell low, the casual familiarity between the three such a comfort in reassurance of the fact.
The first tears began to slip free.
“Nora...” Deacon’s voice was definitively awake now, and she bit her lips to try to stop herself from outright sobbing.
Deacon rubbed her arm comfortingly, and Mac breathed in heavily, stirring awake. His hand flexed in a gentle stroke of her skin before he withdrew his arm from beneath, propping himself up on his other elbow to sleepily see what was going on.
Mac blinked a few times before giving Nora’s shoulder a soothing stroke, and then kissed it. “…hey, it’s okay... did you have a nightmare?”
Nora shook her head again, trying to take a steadying breath as the tears still streaked down her face. “…I just… I feel safe...” She could feel Deacon and Mac both sharing a sleep-addled look as she buried her face into Deacon’s chest. She probably wasn’t making sense to them, but it was exactly why she was crying.
“…you feel safe?” Mac asked a bit sleepily, wondering if he’d misheard. He had a warm palm flat against Nora’s back and was rubbing in a reassuring way that only seemed to make the tears flow more freely.
She nodded, turning her face to speak. “…yeah.” The sort of hysterical laugh that accompanied the statement was made through tears. “It’s overwhelming… I’ve never, ever felt this safe…” her breath hitched. “…not like this. I can’t— I can’t take it… it’s so much.”
She was feeling too much was the problem. She didn’t know safety could be felt at this kind of level. It was shaking her foundations as much as herself, and it was frightening in its newness. The reassurance was heavy, crushing in its comfort, and she didn’t know what to do with it.
“Oh sweetheart…” Deacon spoke first, voice burgeoning with something tight and wonderful as he pressed a kiss to her forehead.
“That’s right, you are safe. Safe as can be right here...” MacCready’s voice had the same quality to it that Deacon’s did, and Nora squeezed the hand he put into her own.
“…It just… It hit me all at once…” Nora tried to explain, blinking back tears through an embarrassed, shaky wet smile. “…I know you’re both capable. I-I know that. I’ve seen it. …but it just hit me— I only just comprehended it- I don’t know why I’m crying….”
“Nora, babydoll, you know that’s like the highest compliment you can pay us, right?” Deacon said with a grin that was bright in the night of the room.
She weakly laughed, still trying not to give into the sobs. The comparison of how safe she felt now was stark compared to how she’d always lived life before, past or present. She grieved her assumed definition of normal. She’d been under the illusion of what she considered safe to be for so long that the difference was jarring and disturbing. She grieved for that version of herself who didn’t know any better.
“I’m safe and it’s… it’s so much...”
“Hey, we’ve got you, boss. Both of us.”
She turned in to Mac’s arms as he wrapped them around her. Deacon chuckled at his tear-wet t-shirt and peeled it off real quick before he scooted closer so her back was pressed into his dry chest. He placed a smiling kiss to the back of her neck and rubbed her flank with his palm.
“…I feel like I’m falling apart,” Nora laughed in a self-deprecating manner.
“…did I ever tell you I’m really good at puzzles?” Deacon spoke gently into her ear, earning another wet laugh from Nora.
Mac snorted and smiled at that in agreement. “Yeah, any time you wanna fall apart, we’ll be here to put you back together again,” he promised, kissing her forehead as she pressed her face into his neck. “It’s okay… it’s really okay.”
“…it is,” Nora agreed, smiling and trying to stop her tears. She groped behind her for Deacon’s arm, and pulled him even closer so they were both hugging her tightly; impossible not to be aware of both. It felt like bliss, and breaking all over again. “Don’t let go.”
“Never,” MacCready promised, giving a squeeze of his arms around her.
“Between me and this guy, you’re not going anywhere, hot stuff,” Deacon said as he pet her thigh and rubbed her back.
They stayed like that long enough for their breathing to go slow and relaxed, for Nora to calm listening to the steady beat of Mac’s heart, and feel Deacon’s easy, rhythmic breaths at her back as they all laid there. It was peaceful and perfect, and Nora felt a little embarrassed for having woken them both for what was essentially not a problem.
“…sorry,” she spoke softly after a moment. “…I feel stupid…”
Deacon nosed at the nape of her neck, and MacCready pressed a kiss to her forehead. Both were still plenty alert even in the peace of the dark room, awake with their thoughts of Nora, and her thoughts of them.
“…Don’t be sorry for feeling safe with us. It’s a high compliment out here.”
“And I think it’s safe to say we love you, stupid-feeling and all.”
Nora shook in slight chuckles between them, and both men reassured her through warm touch, and closeness that eventually pulled them all back to restful, dreamless sleep.
Mac and Deacon were both beaming the next day, looking proud with a spring in their steps as they went about their respective business at the settlement. Deacon did a better job of hiding their obvious pleasure than Mac did, but the sniper’s chest– puffed out when he looked at her- spoke loudly enough for the both of them.