Work Text:
“Did you call me baby, back there?”
“Yeah.”
For just a second, Donna fears she might have crossed some kind of line she didn’t know existed between what she is and is not allowed to do or say tonight. After all, it’s not like she and Josh had any extensive conversation about what pretending to be his girlfriend is supposed to mean exactly. He’s not even the one who asked her to do it — Sam and Toby did.
“Do you think you can pretend to be Josh’s girlfriend for a day?” They knocked on her door about a week ago to share their concern for their common friend.
She shot them a puzzled look in return. “Why?”
“Amy will be there.” They’d just learned that Josh’s ex, who he somehow couldn’t stop himself from getting back to every time he saw her again no matter how wrong they both were for each other (and how badly things ended every time they gave their romance another chance), had been invited to the same wedding the four of them were going to.
“Ah.”
Even before being told why they needed her to play the fake girlfriend, Donna knew this would be a bad idea. For her own sake, mainly; simply and purely because she has an impossible crush on Josh. Yet she still agreed to take up the role pretty quickly. As someone who too made the mistake of going back into the arms of a partner she was better off without, she could relate to the situation.
Plus she’d told the three men, back when she first interviewed to live with them the first time she did get away from her ex, that they’d find her valuable. This was one way of staying true to her word. And she owed Josh more than anyone.
He had been the one, after all, who’d made the final decision of choosing her over who knows how many other potential candidates for roommates they had had during their search. He hadn’t said much: simply handed her his keys to the apartment with a soft smile. She held onto them like he’d just given her some precious piece of jewelry, a grin painting itself on her own face.
If she’s being honest, this is the moment when Donna’s crush for him started to develop. Right at the end of their very first meeting.
But this was over a year ago; and as she’s learned to know him more and more every day of sharing a home with him, her feelings for him have only grown further. Only to come to an all-time high today, while faking what she can’t help but wish were true more than ever now. And it’s not even the end of it: they still have a full night of festivities to go through together…
“Okay.” Josh’s voice suddenly takes her out of her reverie and brings her back to the present. Apart from a brief moment of pause, he doesn’t seem that phased out by her choice of pet name after all, and simply carries on with their conversation while guiding her towards their table with a hand carefully placed on her lower back. It’s not even a gesture he does as part of their little scheme; Donna knows he’s just doing it out of habit. They’ve always been very tactile.
However, it does seem to work in favor of it — she can feel (as well as see from the corner of her eye) Amy’s gaze burning through her core while she stares at them from her own seat. Which is, thankfully, situated almost at the opposite of them. Not that Josh’s ex-girlfriend has been much of a problem so far, to be honest.
The jealousy was easily readable on her face when he told her he and Donna were dating, but as opposed to what Sam and Toby had warned her about regarding his potential behavior towards the other woman, Josh hasn’t shown any interest in her. He rather seems very committed to their bit (which Donna never thought he would agree to in the first place, actually) and making sure never to leave his fake girlfriend’s side.
Something she isn’t going to complain about.
Once they get to their places, dinner goes by very smoothly. It helps that they’re surrounded by nothing but friendly faces. Indeed, their table is made only of the four roommates and a few of the guys’ friends that Donna has met on several occasions before and befriended herself over time, including Toby and Sam’s (real!) girlfriends. For a moment there, she forgets about the lie she’s supposed to be living as she enjoys her night out with people whose company she likes, until Ainsley brings the topic of her and Josh’s supposed relationship right back up.
“When did you guys start dating?” she asks, cutting them right in the middle of (yet another) argument about Donna stealing some of his food.
(It’s not her fault if he picked a different meal option than her, and she wants to have a taste of it.)
The question catches her off-guard. As she meets with several pairs of eyes intently watching them, she can’t help but feel a little ashamed — she’s only now realizing she hasn’t paid much attention to anything that was going on around the table for… quite a while, lost in her own conversations with Josh.
“You didn’t tell her?” Instead of answering her friend’s question, she turns towards Sam. She thought at least she and C.J. had been entrusted with the truth, but apparently not.
“Told me what?” Her own interrogation seems to pique Ainsley’s curiosity.
“Josh and Donna are not dating. She is pretending to be his girlfriend tonight to keep him away from Amy.”
“Oh, I see.”
But all Donna sees is that Ainsley didn’t even know about the fake dating scheme, yet still assumed they were together, at a time when neither of them were, in fact, trying to fake it. And she’s not the first to make that mistake: several times in the past did people assume the two of them were a couple when they were actually just acting like they always do around each other.
She usually brushes it off — these people probably just don’t know what two very close friends look like — but somehow tonight it’s harder to get past it.
Probably because without knowing it, Ainsley has put into words a feeling Donna’s had ever since Josh first introduced her to someone as his new girlfriend: this doesn’t really feel like playing pretend. They’ve easily fallen into what was supposed to be a new rhythm between them, but that somehow isn’t too different from what they’re used to.
They haven’t had to change much about their behavior yet to successfully pass as a couple and it’s a little… odd, maybe.
At least it makes her think. Especially when later, after watching the main couple of the day share their first dance, Josh invites her to the dancefloor. “Come dance with me.” He stands up and grabs her hand to join the already small crowd that has formed in the middle of the room.
Donna dutifully follows, not without looking around in search of Amy — she has to be the reason why he’s taken her here and is now pulling her close to his chest as they slowly swirl around to the sound of the music.
But Donna can’t find her anywhere. It’s just them, right here. They’re not bound by any lie, not putting on a show for anyone. If he’s asked her to dance, it’s because he wants to be with her, and not who she’s pretending to be.
It definitely adds to the confusion Donna is feeling.
She still lets herself relax between Josh’s arms. This proximity between them is new — it’s not like the pub they usually frequent on their nights out allows for much slow dancing, nor do they play that kind of music when inviting people over inside their home —, yet it feels very natural at the same time. Josh is a good dancer, and he leads her around with his eyes never leaving hers, softly smiling through it all. The way the room is lit makes his face shine even brighter under the beautiful fairy lights; Donna can feel herself falling in love.
For real.
If she didn’t know better, she could easily lose herself in that gaze and believe, too, that she’s sharing a dance with her boyfriend at some friends’ wedding. And not just because her few weeks as a drama student taught her how to fully immerse herself into a role. She’s not good enough as an actress for that.
“You should keep that dress.” It’s Josh who breaks the silence between them first. His eyes are piercing right through her. As he talks, Donna can feel his thumbs skimming over the fabric where they lay on her waist. “You really do look great in it.”
Nobody is paying them any attention right now, and Josh is speaking in such a low voice that makes Donna know he’s once again not acting under any pretense. It makes her heart flutter in her chest.
She didn’t cross any line earlier by calling him baby, but they’re definitely toying around a new one now — maybe she’s not the only one wishing all of this was real. Because she knows all too well what Josh is referring to: it’s nothing but a follow-up to an earlier conversation, when she first showed her outfit to her roommates before they left for the wedding.
All three of them praised her looks as soon as they saw her, even though really, the one reaction she was looking forward to the most was Josh’s. And he didn’t disappoint.
“Wow, you look amazing,” he said, eyes roaming over her body before asking if she’d bought the dress. He knows her well, after all, and knows she tends to try and save money by returning clothes she wears just for one night sometimes. And if, just like she let him know back then, she didn’t have any intention of keeping it before… now he’s kind of making her want to reconsider her choices.
Not really because he told her to do it, no, but because he’s right: she does look sensational in that dress. Many have told her so today.
(And, well, okay, maybe because he did tell her to do it.)
“Thanks.” She shoots him a bright smile. She can feel her cheeks turning red at the compliment.
As they keep looking at each other, Donna wants to say more; this feels like this is their moment and she shouldn’t let it pass by. Unfortunately for her, though, before she can open her mouth again, Amy suddenly appears in front of her and brings the moment to an end. (The irony isn’t lost on Donna, that she is supposed to come in-between the two. Not the other way around.)
“I need to talk to you.” She taps on Josh’s shoulder to make him look her way. He seems surprised to see her when he turns around and finds her there.
Despite his ex-girlfriend’s words, he doesn’t move. Donna can feel his hands still firmly holding her as he answers her. “I’m—…” He wants to argue, she can tell, but Amy cuts him off.
“Now.”
Her voice is more urgent, almost commanding, which eventually prompts Josh to follow her while leaving Donna alone in the middle of the dance floor. Watching them go, she knows she’s failing at her main job of the night, but this is not really the reason why her heart tightens in her chest at the sight they offer together.
There’s a bitter taste in her mouth, one she’s quick to cover with that of alcohol when a waiter passes by and offers her a flute of champagne.
Unlike Amy, who most definitely snuck up on them on purpose, Donna didn’t mean to interrupt Josh’s moment with his ex. She was simply wandering through the venue in search of something to do, or someone to talk to. She didn’t even see her, at first; her eyes only fell on Josh, and she smiled, relieved to see him. She walked up to him as he came to meet her halfway, a little too tipsy to fully register the way his grin turned just a tad too bright upon seeing her or to read the expression inside his eyes.
She might have seen what he did next coming otherwise.
“Joooosh, I’m bored,” she complained — to which he didn’t answer. Or at least, not with words. Because, yes, his actions did take her out of her boredom, taking her by surprise when he simply grabbed her face and kissed her.
It was not, in all honesty, some earth-shattering kiss or anything of the sort. Nothing like the kind of kiss she’d (on too many occasions) dreamed of sharing with him. It was actually short enough that by the time Donna fully registered what was happening, Josh’s lips had already left hers.
It still shattered her world, though, and made her crave for more.
But then she finally spotted Amy a few feet behind him, a mean look painted on her features, and the adrenaline quickly died down as she understood what was going on. Josh didn’t kiss her because he wanted to — he’d done so as part of their cover, probably to prove a point to Amy or something. She couldn’t really blame him for it, but it didn’t mean that the realization didn’t hurt.
They haven’t talked about it since it happened, though; and now the night is coming to an end — Donna can see more and more guests leaving the party from her spot on the balcony. Which means she soon won’t have to pretend anymore. Or at least, she won’t have to pretend that she and Josh are an item. She still, however, will have to pretend she doesn’t have feelings for him.
A job much harder than the previous one, especially now that she’s gotten a glimpse of what being his girlfriend could look like and had a taste of the feeling of his lips against hers.
“Donna! We’ve been looking for you,” a voice in her back startles her out of her meandering thoughts. Josh is there when she turns around, walking slowly towards her and looking a little worried.
“Sorry. I just needed some air. Are we leaving yet?”
“Soon, yeah. If we don’t want Sam to leave us behind.” His eyes are soft on her, although she can tell he’s avoiding her gaze a little.
“Guess we’d better get inside, then.” Donna smiles back at him before she starts putting action into her words. She’s only walked a few steps when Josh calls after her, making her stop in her tracks.
“Uh, Donna…” He looks somewhat unsure; it actually takes him a few seconds before he tells her what he wants to say. “About earlier, that was… inappropriate.”
He doesn’t have to mention it for her to understand he’s talking about the kiss, and immediately the image of him grabbing her face and planting his mouth on hers appears in her mind. It makes her heart miss a beat in her chest, a feeling that soon turns into a little sadness. Inappropriate. She doesn’t like the sound of it.
“Don’t worry about it.” She tries to play it cool.
“No, I—… I feel terrible. Amy was telling me she didn’t really believe we were together, and then you showed up at the same time, and I… I didn’t think before I acted. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” Donna once again dismisses it. “I didn’t mind. I did agree to pretend to be your girlfriend. It was bound to happen.” She offers him a soft smile, hoping this is going to be the end of this conversation. But Josh doesn’t stop there — and what he tells her next actually catches her off-guard.
“I just…” He passes a nervous hand through his hair. “… didn’t want it to happen like that.”
She doesn’t know what to make of those words. She doesn’t want to get her hopes up too much, but also can’t help but think he’s trying to tell her he’s also thought about kissing her before. Although maybe, more realistically, it’s something else entirely.
“What do you mean?”
“I…” She can tell Josh wants to expand on it, and she needs him to, but unfortunately for her he chickens out. “Nothing. I’m just sorry, that’s all. We should really get going.” He starts walking away, a silent invite for Donna to follow him.
Which she does. And as they say goodbye to the remaining guests and newlyweds, she has to endure several different people hinting at a possible next wedding being theirs or praising themselves for having always known the two of them would end up together.
It’s exhausting — somehow more than whatever other fake dating they had to previously do. Donna is relieved when she’s finally back into the sanctity of her room and it’s all over for good. She wants to go to sleep fast, and she almost does, until she starts hearing Josh’s door (which is right in front of hers) open. His steps sound like they’re coming towards her own room, yet he doesn’t knock nor does he seem to move for a while.
It’s enough to get Donna curious. She gets out of her bed to open the door for him if he’s not ready to do it himself. There she finds him standing with his fist up in the air.
“What are you doing?” she asks. He startles at the sight of her before quickly regaining his composure. A smile forms on his face.
“Hi.”
“Hi. What are you doing here?” Donna asks again. She’s used to him showing up in her room, usually when he’s drunk and disappointed over something at work, but he rarely ever knocks. And he usually doesn’t do so after spending the whole day with her already. She can tell something’s up with him — the intense way with which he’s looking at her makes her a little worried.
“I just… When I said I didn’t want our kiss to happen like that, earlier…” Josh takes a step towards her, and she frowns, still unsure of what’s going on here. “I meant I wanted it to happen like this.”
Donna doesn’t have the time to ask what the hell he’s rambling about, because one second he’s talking and the next his mouth is on hers, properly kissing her this time, for real, while behind them the door closes.
(As they spent the remainder of the night together, she definitely doesn’t fake it this time.)