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"Which one is prettier?"
Maple holds up the two sweaters she just tried on that look, well, exactly the same, and Shin frowns, squinting his eyes and trying to figure out what exactly the difference may be.
Listen: yes, he agreed to go on this shopping trip with her. But only because his therapist told him he should get out more, and definitely not at all because he cares about Maple a lot more than he wants to.
It's just, how could he not? They're— they're the same. They could be siblings with how similar their backstories are, and dammit, maybe he does feel a little guilty for not warning her when she got involved with— he stops his train of thinking there, because a panic attack in the middle of a Forever 21 changing room is not the vibe for today, and if he keeps blaming himself he knows he's going to get to that point.
"The left one," he says, and Maple grins, nodding her head.
"I knew you'd pick that one! I thought so, too, but I was a little doubtful when I tried it on. I knew you'd tell me the truth!" says Maple.
He's not sure if she's kidding or if, by chance, she actually sees a difference in the clothes, but he's glad she's happy with his bluff of an answer.
"It's your turn," Maple smiles, handing Shin a sweater that she picked out for him to try on. It's apparently a trendy style right now, or something, god knows he doesn't keep up with any of that, but she was very enthusiastic that they had one in his size and insisted that he must try it on. She spins around on her heel to face the wall.
He's not sure why they couldn't just take two separate changing rooms, but apparently it's easier this way, and he's learned over the time he's been friends with her that Maple is, well… a little oblivious when it comes to personal space and such. He's never really understood how she can just be so open about everything.
Shin turns around, too, and pulls the sweater on over his head. "You can look," he says, and Maple's face lights up the second she sees him.
"Shin, oh my god! You look stunning," Maple squeals, letting out an audible gasp when he turns around a little to let her see how it looks from every angle, something he picked up from watching her do it enough times. "C'mere—" she opens her arms wide, and wraps them around his back, and shit, shit, shit.
Shin freezes. He doesn't move, doesn't blink, doesn't even process what's happening in front of him. His eyes are open, but he isn't seeing anything, and his eyes are starting to water and he doesn't know why.
Maple lets go of him quickly, and before he realizes it he's backing up against the wall and dropping to the floor and he's sobbing, and he doesn't even understand why.
"Shin, I'm so sorry," Maple says, crouching down to sit a safe distance in front of him. It takes a minute for him to look up at her, but he does, eventually, and her concerned face only makes his throat choke up more, and he's shaking, and she looks so worried, and fuck.
"Shin," she says again. "Shin, sweetheart, you're okay. You'll be okay."
In a moment of bravery or maybe just desperation, Shin pulls himself forward and clings onto Maple like she's his lifeline, tears quickly soaking the top of her shirt as he wraps his arms tighter around her. "Sorry," he apologizes, his voice going high, "just, just a moment, please."
"Take as long as you need, baby," Maple says gently, running her hands up and down his back. "I'm here."
He cries for a few more moments, or maybe longer than that, and when he lifts his head and looks up at Maple again he can't help but to laugh a little. What is he doing, exactly? Sitting on the floor of a changing room in the mall, holding onto someone he's only just beginning to get close to, crying over getting a hug everyone knows he needs.
It's a little silly, and Maple laughs with him, too, giving him a kiss on the forehead and helping him to stand up.
"You're lucky you didn't mess up that sweater, especially since it's your first time wearing it," Maple jokes, using her sleeves to dry off his face. "Why don't you change, and I'll pay for everything, okay? We can go to the food court next; I think they have hot chocolate during winter!"
She turns back around and leaves him to switch tops once again, and honestly, he feels almost at home here, in the too-small changing room with holiday music playing over the speakers and his best friend facing away, waiting for his signal that they can continue with their little outing.
Going places other than work and home is still difficult, and Shin won't lie to himself about that. But if he has friends who love him like Maple does to help him, he could see this sort of thing becoming a more frequent occurrence.