Chapter Text
Gwyn woke up with the sunlight coming through the window, something definitely rare for her,
who was usually already up hours before dawn because of the persistent nightmares.
But after the evening before…after two hours of the best sex the two of them had ever had, they
needed a good night's sleep.
She and Azriel had already been in a friendship with benefits for a few months, it still felt like a
fantasy. All hours of fighting, all mornings together, all small competitions and provocations, all
hours of silent company in the private library.
Everything that was so special to them, so precious. Anything that put this friendship at risk was too
dangerous. But keeping all the desire they felt for each other locked up was even more dangerous.
So, after an impulsive kiss in the middle of a hand-to-hand fight, and Gwyn missing training for
three days out of shame, Azriel came after her.
They talked and the two didn't want to ruin their friendship, but… sex doesn't have to have an
emotional connection, right? They could keep everything exactly as it was, just add a few hours of
pleasure.
Maybe spending the night with him wasn't the usual thing for friendships with benefits, but… it
wouldn't do any harm… would it?
Gwyn opened her eyes and saw Azriel's arm around her waist, her back pressed against his chest,
and their legs entwined. She closed her eyes and wished she could stay like this for a few more
minutes, but she knew they couldn't, they both had work in a few hours and couldn't be late.
She felt Azriel stir behind her and turned to look at him and saw his shadows come to life. That
was probably her favorite part of watching him wake up, his shadows swirling around
him, and then doing the same to her. They were practically pets.
"Good morning, sweetheart,” he says huskily.
“Good morning, Shadowsinger,” she whispers.
"What time is it?" he asks, brushing her coppery hair off her shoulder and placing a few kisses
there.
“I think half past seven,” she replies as she traces the tattoos on Azriel's chest with her fingers.
He spreads kisses all over Gwyn's neck and each one sets her skin on fire.
"Az," she says, trying to pull away but is stopped by his arm around her waist.
"Hmm."
“We have to get up."
“We don't,” he replies as he pulls her closer and drops his hand to Gwyn's hip.
It became difficult to breathe with him touching her, it always did. Even the slightest touch leaves
her hot, her muscles melting and her heart beating so fast she's afraid it's going to explode.
Gwyn gathers all the strength she has, and walks away from Azriel, at the same moment her body
and soul ask her to return to his arms and never leave there.
Az sits on the bed and gives up trying to keep her, he's always known that when Gwyn decides
something, it's impossible to change that decision. That's not to say he's happy to have to get out of
here.
Gwyn smiled at his sullen expression. And she talks as she gets up and looks for her robe.
“We both have work, at night we can do whatever you want,” she says, tying the sash around her
waist.
“My first meeting isn't until noon, and I know your shift doesn't start until 11,” he says, flopping
down on the bed and putting his arms behind his head for support.
“I want to proofread some texts before my shift, and you,” Gwyn says, leaning a little closer to the
canopy on the bed, “have a stack of reports on your desk."
Azriel grunts and finally stands up. After changing into trousers and a black shirt, Gwyn
approaches him.
"Come on" she says, extending her hand to him "the House is empty so we can have breakfast
☽︎☾︎
That night after work, instead of going to Az's room like she'd been doing for the past week, Gwyn was dragged into an evening of reading with Nesta and Emerie, who had returned from a mission in Illyria that afternoon.
Now the three of them were sprawled on the floor of the private library gorging themselves on hot chocolate and laughing like there was no tomorrow.
“Now enough about my mate,” Nesta said, trying to stop laughing, “I want to hear about your love life, Gwyneth."
Gwyn almost choked on her hot chocolate, and looked scared at her friend.
"Mine? Nesta, I don't have any love life,” she said, tucking her hair behind her ear.
"What?" Emerie exclaimed laughing "Gwyn everyone knows about you and Azriel, you don't even hide it."
The priestess looked away from her friends and took another sip of her drink. Yes, she and Azriel weren't trying to disguise that they were having sex, but it was still awkward to discuss it with the two of them.
"Is it so in your obvious?"' she asks a little shyly.
“Yes,” Emerie and Nesta respond immediately.
"Now tell me how it started,'' the blonde asks.
So Gwyn told them. She tells how they started to be friends, tells vaguely about the late night in the ring, in the library, and doesn't mention the evening he took her to Velaris - that was a memory of them, and that only they had a right to know - She told about that impulsive, rushed, glorious kiss, and told them about the deal.
"Wait,” Emerie interrupts, “Friends with benefits?" she asks
"Yeah."
“Gwyn, by the gods, you are ridiculously in love with each other,” the Illyrian says as if it's obvious.
Gwyn freezes for a second. Love? With Azriel? No, of course not. They were just friends - great friends - and by some chance they had sex.
Love didn't enter the equation.
Of course she was fond of him, very much, and she adored him of course, he had always been amazing to her. But it ended there… didn't it?
"What?" the redhead exclaimed "Of course not. We're just friends-"
"That have sex and sleep together every night?" interrupted Nesta. "Gwyneth, your heart races every time you see him. And he looks at you as if you created the moon and the stars."
Gwyn gets up and starts pacing. That wasn't true.
Or was it?
She'd always thought that her heartbeat was practically doubling because of the attraction she felt. And Az was just kind, he wasn't in love with her.
Gods, what if she was? And if Azriel doesn't reciprocate those feelings, after all, he's the one who came up with the idea of no-strings-attached sex.
"Holy shit"
Nesta and Emerie stood up and hugged her, bringing her to the couch. Her friends started talking and she managed to distract herself for a few hours.
Tomorrow. Tomorrow she would think better of it.