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In the village Yuuta has grown up in, there's a whispered warning that creeps through the streets and lives in the shadows between the buildings: Never cross a gorgon, for they will turn you into stone if your eyes meet.
For as long as he can remember, gorgons have been a part of their lives. Gorgons are fearsome creatures living in the forests bordering on their village, and the villagers have revered them since their ancestors have first settled down in this part of the kingdom. For generations people have travelled to a temple near the ocean, offering sacrifices and asking for a favour in return: a bountiful harvest, a change in weather, good health, and whatever else a mortal could desire.
Despite their reverence, the villagers fear nothing as violently as the creatures they're asking for protection. Every drought or hunger period is accepted with more grace, willingness, and forgiveness than the uncertain fear that comes with walking too deep into the forest. Because suffering from nature's cruelty is real, tangible, but gorgons are cursed deities with venomous snakes for hair and horrifying visages.
That's what the elderly say, at least, when they're reminiscing about myths and tales of older days. No one has seen an actual gorgon for decades, and now many villagers have come to believe that they have long since left the forest. While Yuuta's parents still raised him in the belief of their ancestors, he's realised that times have changed. Rather than praying to them and offering sacrifices, the villagers are more interested in hunting down the remaining gorgons, eager to make a profit. (Yuuta has once heard that the blood taken from a gorgon's right side can bring the dead back to life, but he doubts it.)
After spending all his youth in the village, he still searches for meaning behind the way the villagers act. He grew up listening to tales of gorgons and their generosity—or destructiveness, depending on who he asked—but over the years, Yuuta has come to believe only in what he's experienced himself. He's never seen a gorgon, and so he hasn't yet decided what to think of them.
One day, when the whispered warnings have grown too loud for him to ignore, Yuuta takes a walk to the ocean. He's always preferred spending time outside the village, exploring and experiencing life and its wonders without the bias of times past to cloud his view. As he follows the faint sound of the waves, Yuuta walks close to the forest; he likes to be in the shade of the dark trees and strains his ears to catch any secret they might be willing to share with him. A soft breeze runs through his hair and beckons him to the sea.
An odd noise disturbs his peace. It's something he's never heard before, like a wet growl. His first instinct should be to run away from the unknown dangers inside the forest, but Yuuta's curiosity gets the better of him. Without hesitation, he follows the sound and walks deeper into the woods, careful not to make too much noise himself.
When his eyes land on the creature, he instinctively knows that he's looking at a gorgon, even though it looks different from what he's been told. The 'daughters of the sea', as gorgons are still referred to, are said to all hail from the same clan which only births females, but the gorgon in front of him is male—more beautiful than any woman he's ever seen, but still clearly a man. Yuuta has only seen depictions of gorgons with snakes growing on their heads, never with soft white hair and a face as fine as this. The only part of the creature before him unmistakably marking him as inhuman are his serpent eyes and fangs.
It's like staring into the moon high above the waves at night, and Yuuta finds himself enchanted. He only realises he's been staring when the gorgon hisses, bearing his fangs at him. Yuuta finally notices that he's been caught in a trap, one of the nasty ones used by the villagers to capture large game. The metal has bitten deep into the pale flesh of his leg, and Yuuta can only imagine how much pain he must be going through. Somewhere at the back of his mind he wonders why he isn't turning to stone when they've looked at each other for so long, but right now, Yuuta is too captivated with the gorgon to care about finding an answer.
He moves closer carefully, raising his arms in front of his chest to show he's unarmed. When the gorgon backs away and winces when he moves his leg, Yuuta immediately stops. As much as he tries to come up with a way to calm down the gorgon, he can't think of anything outstanding. In the end, he simply says, “You shouldn't move too much. It'll only make the trap cut deeper.”
It takes some time for the gorgon to respond. When he does, he only cocks his head to the side and lets out a low growl, but at least he seems calmer after hearing Yuuta's voice.
“Let me help you. I'll get you out of that trap,” Yuuta continues, allowing a closed-mouthed smile to tug at his lips. “I won't hurt you, I promise.”
He keeps staring into the gorgon's eyes, hoping the gesture will prove his sincerity. Even from a distance, Yuuta can tell that his eyes are just as captivating as the rest of him, and he finds it hard to believe that something so beautiful could truly turn humans to stone. The gorgon takes his time to look at Yuuta until he huffs and allows some tension to leave his shoulders. It's his permission to come closer, Yuuta realises, so he slowly puts one foot in front of the other and finally kneels down in front of him to inspect the trap. As focused on helping the gorgon as he is, he still can't help but notice the faint scent of the ocean clinging to his hair.
“I have to touch you to get you out of the trap. Is that alright?” Yuuta asks, his voice quiet and serious. He holds his breath in anticipation until the gorgon finally nods and begins to quickly but carefully free him from the trap. It takes some persuasion, but after (rather desperately) listing all the risks of infected wounds, Yuuta is allowed to treat his injury as well. It's a nasty wound that bleeds a deep red against the gorgon's pale skin, and Yuuta hopes that they truly heal as quickly as people believe them to.
From time to time, Yuuta asks a question that comes to his mind, but the only answers he receives are growls and snarls. He wonders whether that's something all gorgons have in common or if something has happened to him in the past that makes him unable to speak. After all, there are weird marks around his mouth, so maybe he's been cursed by a god to live in silence. Jealous gods curse humans all the time, so why wouldn't they curse other creatures as well?
Despite that, Yuuta still feels it proper to introduce himself and ask for a name in return. The gorgon blinks at him for a few moments before reaching for his hand and turning it so his palm faces upward. When he feels soft patterns being drawn on his skin, Yuuta almost becomes petrified. Maybe that's how gorgons turn their victims to stone, he wonders, and tries his best to ignore the heat rising to his cheeks. He forces himself to focus on the slim fingers moving over his palm to form letters and spell out a name he prays doesn't sound too foreign on his tongue.
“Toge?” Yuuta asks when the gorgon's movements have ceased, smiling when he nods with an oddly happy expression on his face. “That's a pretty name.”
A pretty name for a pretty boy, he thinks but doesn't say out loud. Silence settles between them as Yuuta tries to come up with something to say. Neither of them tries to leave, and with the adrenaline slowly subsiding, Yuuta finds that he wants to know more about Toge. There are so many questions tickling his tongue, but he knows better than to ask them all at once. Instead, he tentatively asks one question at a time, and gradually gets better at understanding the way Toge communicates.
Their meeting feels like a dream to him. Even if he's already looked at Toge long enough to remember his face with his eyes closed, Yuuta is still spell-bound to have met a gorgon, especially one that is so different from everything he's learned. Now that Toge knows he means no harm, he appears to be completely comfortable around him. Hours go by during which he calmly uses Yuuta's palm as a writing tablet and during which Yuuta learns that Toge uses different pitches and occasionally random words to communicate. There are long periods of silence between their questions and answers, but neither of them minds.
As the sun begins to set, casting shadows of dark purple on the soft ground, they reluctantly part ways. Nothing that awaits him in his village excites Yuuta as much as the possibility of talking to Toge again, but he has to return before his parents grow worried. When they say their goodbyes, Toge brings Yuuta's hand up to his lips and presses a tender kiss to his fingers before smiling at him and fading back into the forest. Yuuta doesn't know if that's something all gorgons do; but he knows that his face burns bright enough to light his way home.
On his way back, Yuuta walks slower than he usually would, almost as if he's dreading to return to reality after this magical meeting. The moon already looms high in the night sky when he finally arrives at his parents' house. Instead of telling them what happened, he makes up a lie for why he's late and accepts his mother's chiding without batting an eyelid. He thinks he wouldn't even have minded if his father hit him, because anything is better than sharing this secret with someone.
In the coming days, he finds himself returning to the spot where he first found Toge, disappointed every time that he isn't there, waiting for him, but Yuuta keeps telling himself that he isn't entitled to any further affection or time spent together simply because he saved Toge. If they're truly meant to meet again, they will; he wants to believe that, just this once, the gods wouldn't be as cruel as to keep them apart.
Still, Yuuta sees nothing wrong with helping fate along. After about a week of visiting the same spot over and over again, he starts to wander deeper into the forest—maybe in hopes of finding Toge, maybe because he doesn't know what else to do with his life. So he keeps walking, pushing aside low-hanging branches, in search of something to give his journey into the woods meaning.
What he finds there isn't Toge, but a wild boar. Face to face with a wild animal almost as tall as him, Yuuta is rooted to the ground in fear. He's not an adept hunter in general, and now he's not even carrying anything to defend himself with. Challenging a boar with nothing but his physical strength is a foolish thing to do, and even though he knows he should be running for his life now, his feet won't move. As the boar gets ready to charge at him, Yuuta helplessly closes his eyes.
The impact never comes. Yuuta feels some tension leave his body and tentatively opens his eyes, surprised to see Toge a few feet away from the boar. It only takes one low growl from him for the animal to flee. As soon as the boar has disappeared back into the undergrowth, Yuuta lets out a relieved sigh and turns towards Toge. He notices that his wound has healed completely but doesn't get to comment on that, because for all he knows, it looks like Toge is chiding him for being careless.
“I'm sorry, I should've paid more attention to my surroundings. But I really wanted to see you again,” Yuuta admits, sheepishly scratching the back of his head.
His confession makes Toge huff and cross his arms across his chest, but there's a blush on his cheeks as well, easy to spot against his pale skin. Watching how Toge's long lashes make shadows fall over his eyes makes Yuuta feel oddly giddy, and much to his delight, Toge replies that he also wanted to see him again.
They meet more regularly afterwards, choosing a clearing that isn't too far away from Yuuta's village for him to run into trouble, but also secluded enough for no one to disturb them. Over time, Yuuta becomes exceptionally good at understanding Toge, noticing his quirks and habits, and their communication begins to flow more smoothly. He learns that, despite all the rumours and stories, gorgons aren't immortal; their wounds heal quicker and they're less likely to fall ill, but even they can't win against death. Toge confirms that gorgon blood can neither work as poison nor heal anyone, which also makes it impossible to bring anyone back from the dead.
Yuuta is deeply embarrassed when he lists all the stories he's heard from the villagers and finds them all to be false, but Toge laughs it off with that close-eyed chuckle he has come to love.
He also learns that gorgons are prone to physical contact, especially Toge who struggles with expressing himself verbally. It shouldn't have surprised Yuuta as much as it has; Toge has been unafraid of touching him even on the day they met. Now, Toge edges closer to him every time they meet—and Yuuta, who has only ever been touched by his parents, feels his heart almost jump out of his chest the first time Toge cuddles up to him.
Every rub of his head against Yuuta's shoulder, every time he brushes a stray lock of hair out of Yuuta's face, and every letter he spells out on Yuuta's skin sends a shiver down his spine. It's like electricity pulsing through him, and Yuuta has grown quite addicted to the feeling of Toge's skin touching his own. Despite that, it still takes some courage for him to initiate physical affection.
The first time he does, he hides his nervousness behind a question. Yuuta slowly lifts his hand and reaches for Toge's face, giving him enough time to move away if he wants to, but Toge keeps looking at him expectantly. When Yuuta softly cups his cheek, he leans into the touch, and Yuuta is so taken aback that he almost forgets his question.
“Is that the reason you can't talk?” he mutters as he carefully traces the marks around the corners of Toge's mouth with his thumb.
Toge nods against his hand and starts to tell him the story behind the marks. Yuuta listens closely as he draws him the picture of his fate, of how he's been cursed for being born a boy into a clan made of women, and how his voice has been sealed as punishment. Once he ends the story, Yuuta takes Toge's hand (his fingers still resting on the palm of his own) and gives it a squeeze.
With a grave nod, he whispers, “I understand how hard that must be. I really do.”
Yuuta has never quite felt at home in a village full of close-minded people afraid of anything they can't explain, and while he knows his parents love him in the way parents are expected to love their children, he's sure their feelings for him don't go beyond that. He's too curious for them to love him as one of their own, too relieved whenever he's outside the village. It's not exactly the same as Toge's situation, but similar enough.
The time they spend together is everything Yuuta could've ever asked for. It's peaceful and quiet, something he could be content with forever, but of course it doesn't last. The gods are cruel, after all; they cursed both of them once already. With time, rumours grow loud in his village. Instead of tales of the gorgons, Yuuta can hear malicious words being whispered in the shadows now, spinning lies and sowing doubt. They say he's managed to capture a gorgon and wants to keep the profit from chopping up and selling its body to himself, or that he's plotting the destruction of their village with the gorgons' help.
Some even say that he's been sharing his bed with a gorgon in hopes of being granted immortality in return, and Yuuta finds that he doesn't mind this rumour as much as the others, except for the implication that he only spends time with Toge for his personal gain.
He's slighted by the villagers, and while some only throw him dirty looks, others insult and even threaten him. Luckily, Yuuta is too quick on his feet for them to catch him and make true of their threats. His parents look at him the same way the other villagers do, but he isn't surprised by that. In turn, his days spent with Toge become longer and he returns to the village later and later, sometimes contemplating if sleeping in the forest wouldn't be the smarter choice. Even though he knows that Toge worries about him, he doesn't tell him anything, because their time together is precious to him, and Yuuta doesn't want it to be tainted by anyone or anything.
One night, after almost deciding to sleep in the clearing, Yuuta wakes up to the smell of fire. He's wide awake within the blink of an eye, looking around in confusion and holding his blanket to his nose so that he doesn't breathe in any smoke. He can't spot his parents anywhere, and that's when he realises he's been abandoned not only by the village, but by his family as well. It hurts less than he would've expected it to.
So far, only the front of the house is burning. Yuuta hurries to the back and manages to escape through one of the windows, greedily breathing in the cool night air. Now that the sound of fire doesn't drown out any other noise, he hears the crowd that has gathered in front of the burning building. They scream and laugh, and the malice in their voices makes a shiver run down his spine. Yuuta dives into the shadows and tries to leave the village unnoticed. (It's a lot easier than it should be because everyone has gathered to watch him burn.)
As soon as he reaches the gate, he breaks into a sprint, his long legs carrying him away from what hasn't been his home in a very long time. He doesn't have a destination in mind and runs into the forest on pure instinct. Moving his body usually calms him down, but with every stride deeper into the woods, the panic returns. As much as he doesn't want to be killed by the villagers, he wants to lead them to Toge less.
Yuuta runs for as long as his legs are carrying him, his heavy breathing the only thing he hears, his lungs burning him from the inside. When he finally reaches the clearing, he sees Toge standing there, and at first he thinks his exhaustion is playing tricks on him. But Toge opens his arms for him, welcomes him in his fear, and Yuuta all but smashes into him. He might be taller than Toge, but as a gorgon, he's still stronger than him, something Yuuta realises anew when he accepts him into his arms without questioning him. His pants are the only sound filling the silence of the forest as Toge gently runs his fingers through Yuuta's hair.
After what feels like hours, Yuuta eventually takes a step back. His heart almost breaks at the concerned look on Toge's face.
“Alright?” Toge asks, his voice raspy from lack of use.
“I'm fine, yeah. Thank you.” Yuuta can tell that Toge doesn't believe him, even if he doesn't pressure him into talking. But he doesn't have the time for lengthy explanations; he's already made up his mind, and if he doesn't pull through now, he might change it again. He takes a deep breath and looks Toge straight into the eyes. “We can't see each other any longer.”
It takes some time for the words to sink in. Yuuta hasn't thought about how Toge might react, and he's strangely relieved when Toge only furrows his brow and cocks his head to the side, obviously confused. He's silently asking Yuuta for a reason, and for a brief moment, he thinks about lying to him, but he could never do that.
“The people from my village are trying to kill me. They know about us, and I don't know what they'll do to you once they find you here. I couldn't bear seeing you hurt, Toge, and—”
Toge doesn't let him finish. He firmly takes hold of Yuuta's hand, obviously displeased with his explanation, and starts pulling him along. As Yuuta follows him deeper into the forest, the fear still lingers at the back of his mind, but Toge's hand is warm around his own and chases away any doubts he has. He doesn't care where Toge is taking him, as long as they're safe. There's no home for him to return to, anyway.
They keep walking until they reach a place that looks like a makeshift camp. Some pouches are lying to the side of a small fire pit. Next to that is a sleeping spot made from leaves and feathers. Toge lets go of his hand and gestures for Yuuta to lie down and rest. With the state he's in, Yuuta doubts that he can simply fall asleep, but as soon as he lies down he's engulfed by Toge's smell, and suddenly his limbs and eyelids feel heavy and he drifts off to sleep.
When Yuuta wakes again, he can't tell how much time has passed. The treetops are too thick for him to see if the sun has risen. Toge is already waiting for him: he's packed up the few things that were lying around, and from the way he looks at him, Yuuta can tell that he's ready to leave this place—his home, as Yuuta assumes—behind for him. The realisation makes him feel like he's choking.
“They'll hunt you down if you join me.” It's not what Yuuta truly wants to say, but as much as he wants to give in, the fear is still stronger. “What if they hurt you? I could never forgive myself.”
Toge lets out a huff as if he's offended that Yuuta assumes he could lose against humans, and maybe it's warranted. Yuuta doesn't know anything about the gorgons' strength. Still, there are many hunters living in the village, and despite not being human, Toge still bleeds like he does. He's not immortal, and that frightens Yuuta to the core.
When Yuuta doesn't add anything, Toge sighs and his eyes soften. He knows it's because Toge is just as concerned about him, and he finds some comfort in that. A small smile on his lips, Toge beckons him closer, patiently waiting for Yuuta to stand up and walk towards him.
Toge gestures for Yuuta to raise his hand in front of his chest, and when he does, he reaches out to lace his fingers with Yuuta's. Despite its huskiness, his voice sounds sure as he mutters, “Forever.”
“I thought you weren't immortal.” Yuuta lets out a sheepish, shaky laugh before Toge can answer and gently pulls him closer. “That's not what you mean, right? You mean ‘forever' as in ‘for the rest of our lives', don't you?”
Toge nods, and Yuuta's heart aches. In truth, there's nothing he wants more than to spend all the time he has left with Toge, despite the fear still clawing at him. But Toge's eyes are brimming with determination and confidence; he's so convinced that everything will be alright as long as they're together, and when he squeezes Yuuta's hand, he feels all his fear fade away.
Gingerly, Yuuta raises their intertwined hands to his lips to press a kiss to the back of Toge's hand.
“I'd like that. Let's spend our forever together.”
They share one last gaze before Toge, still holding Yuuta's hand, turns around and starts walking, leading him out of the forest and into their new future. With every step that takes him farther away from the place of his birth, Yuuta feels more at ease—because if it means spending the rest of his life with Toge, he doesn't mind travelling the land without ever settling down.