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Nacht der Volksgeister

Summary:

Greg and his fellow crew members are sent to film an episode of The Statehouse one night, unfortunately they don't know just how dangerous and supernatural this night truly is.

Notes:

HAPPY HALLOWEEN! ...A tad late in the day, but please cut me some slack I put a lot of work into getting this fic done before the end of the night. I hope you enjoy it, it's a psuedo sequel to "Bad Luck Buddy" or at least similar to it.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

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Greg hated night shifts.

He's a sound guy, he shouldn't have night shifts-not often; but no, the higher ups demand an episode of The Statehouse where they do night stuff. Bedtime routines and that junk. Never mind that Greg had his own bedtime routine. They had already filmed their episode of The Statehouse for the month anyway, so Greg wasn't exactly sure why they needed another one.

At least it was a beautiful night. He was pretty sure. He couldn't see the stars, but the temperature was in the low eighties and there was a light chill in the air.

And he wasn't alone.

Devon and Luke were two of the people on the production crew that Greg had become friends with. Luke was from San Diego and it was his car they were using to transport their equipment. He worked as a cameraman on the show. Greg wasn't really sure why Luke took the job. He was a surfer and when he started he had had no experience with a camera (that's how desperate the show was for employees). But he was exceedingly nice and chill-and quite handsome as well-so no one really complained about his original ineptitude with a camera. They had eventually managed to teach him how to film, which was good because Greg would've been sad to see him fired.

Devon was from Branson, Missouri, and she only took the job because it would get her to LA (the government paid for all travel). She was a jack-of-all trades on the set, and was given pretty much whatever job the crew needed for the day. It was good because she aimed to succeed at everything she did. The "big dream," as she sarcastically referred to it, was getting a job as a screen writer after quitting the show. Greg hoped she would keep in contact with him after she left. He liked talking to her, even if the rest of the crew thought she was a bitch. She wasn't, she just didn't care to hide anything about herself. 

"I don't see what is so important about the states and how they get ready for bed," Devon complained as they began the drive.

Greg shrugged. "I don't know, why did they make me film their reactions to walking in on somebody changing? The government is weird."

"Honestly I thought that was one of your best Greg," Luke said from the driver's seat. Greg smiled over at him.

"I don't see the big deal about the states in general," Devon continued, "If the government wants to keep constant tabs on them they should just cut out the middle men and just have security cameras. No need to frame it as a reality show." Devon leaned forward from where she was in the backseat talking right behind Greg. He shivered as her breath hit his neck.

He made a non-committal gesture. "Hey, at least it gives us a job. And y'know, maybe if you actually talked to the states you might find you kinda like them."

"I can try, Florida and Loui seem like a lot of fun. Might also be nice to get to know my own state," Luke said as they turned off the highway. Greg didn't know how to tell Luke that aside from rare occasions, California wasn't the surfer dudebro that Luke was expecting.

Devon was not so kind. "Yeah, and talk to the men who want to strip me of all my rights? No thanks." Okay that was fair. "Why do you even want us to talk to them anyway?"

"Because then maybe you wouldn't hate them? ...And also it would be nice not to be the only crew member they talk to. Seriously, I'm the sound guy, but too many times I get dragged away from sound duties to do the interviews because somebody doesn't want to talk to Florida. I already have enough work on The Table, The Statehouse is supposed to be more relaxed for me."

It sucks working for The Table. Or rather, being The Table since he's the only crew member on that show. Working for The Statehouse was supposed to be easier since he would be working with a bunch of people, but too often he was forced to do more work than he wanted because despite being born and raised in New York (and partially Florida), he was a total pushover.

"Yeah, no, not a good enough reason. Hey Luke, what kind of music do you have in here?"

It turned out to be mostly stoner rock. It was surprisingly nice to listen to as the drove out of the city limits.

As they got closer to The Statehouse, the sky began to open up and more stars were visible. Greg didn't really visit The Statehouse at night, so he had never noticed that around it the stars shined through the usual California smog much better.

"How does it do that?" Luke asked in awe, staring at the stars as they parked in the driveway. There were no other cars in the driveway, despite the fact that most of the states had cars. Somehow they would always either end up in the garage without being put there, or disappear altogether until the state needed it again.

"State weirdness," Greg answered honestly.

They unloaded the equipment before approaching the front door. Greg stopped on the porch steps as Devon and Luke went on. Greg had an awful feeling in his stomach. Suddenly he felt tiny and weak. Something in his subconscious made him want to run, run as far away as he could. Like prey.

Devon looked back at him, "Greg, what's up?" Luke turned back as well.

He looked up at the two. "Maybe...maybe filming can wait for another day."

Devon shrugged and started walking back to the car with no complaint. "Fine by me. I don't even wanna be here."

Luke grabbed her shoulder. "Hey wait, won't the producers be mad if we don't film tonight? We have a job to do! Greg, what's wrong? Why don't you wanna film?"

Greg struggled to articulate it. "It...It just feels wrong. We shouldn't go in there." He gestured his arms in an unhelpful way.

"Good enough for me," Devon said as she tried to leave again. Luke held her back with her backpack.

"If you're uncomfortable you can stay behind Greg, but I would appreciate at least somebody to help out with the filming. I can cover for you, but I don't wanna get fired. This is a good gig." Luke let go of Devon and gave a pleading face to them both.

Luke was right. The producers would be pissed they hadn't filmed when asked and even if Luke went on his own he couldn't exactly do it well. While Greg was confident that he wouldn't be fired (since the states liked him so much) and Devon was confident she could get hired by someone else after being fired; Luke did not have that luxury.

Greg sighed, "No, it's best if we get it done tonight. I'm probably just a little under the weather. Come on Devon, we should help out." He came up the porch steps and stood by Luke.

Devon stared at the two for a moment before groaning. "Fiiiine. Let's do such a good job they never ask us to do this again."

The three entered the house, and immediately regretted not abandoning the episode.

Instead of the regular house was a singular, endless, yellow hallway with dim lighting. That feeling of being prey was even stronger now. 

"Oh fuck this noise," Devon exclaimed after a few shocked moments, turning around to leave. "Where the hell is the door?!"

Greg and Luke turned towards her. Sure enough, there was no door. Devon began banging on the yellow wallpaper and feeling around it, trying to find the door.

"Greg has this ever happened before?" Luke asked frantically as he began trying to find the door while Devon tried calling someone on her phone.

"No. It acts up sometimes, but..." Greg took a step towards the hallway. Despite his fear, he could not help but be curious.

"Acts up?" Luke queried.

"I have no signal! All the apps are glitching out!" Luke and Greg tried their phones while Devon tried texting or messaging.

"Mines not working either," Luke solemnly stated, looking over at Greg. Greg shook his head back.

"You should have just listened to Greg!" Devon shouted in anger, giving up on her phone.

"How was I supposed to know this would happen!" Luke tried to defend himself.

"Hey!" Greg interrupted the two of them. Once they had quieted down he continued, "There's no point arguing now. We should just find the door out. And as it so happens I don't blame anyone for this." He picked up his bag and began walking down the hallway.

Devon and Luke followed quickly behind, and Luke started fiddling with a camera. "I can film this! You know how rare actual supernatural stuff is caught on film?"

Devon scoffed. "Great. When we die there will be video evidence of it."

The hall way seemed endless. Nothing but ugly yellow wallpaper for what felt like miles. The lights didn't help. They were shoddy florescent lights that kept flickering in and out. It reminded Greg of a class he had in university that always had half the lights off because it was easier than having them on and always flickering. This did not comfort Greg.

"How long do you think it'll be until we find the door?" Luke asked.

"I could tear up the wallpaper looking for it, but you might not like who I become after that," Devon joked with a sarcastic laugh.

"Is that a movie reference? I don't think I've seen that one."

Devon sighed and silence took the trio once more.

The light in front of them flickered on and the breathed out in relief. The door.

"Alright," Devon stepped ahead to the door, "Let's get out of here and never come back."

Greg stood next to her as she began to open the door, before Luke gave a shriek. The other two startled and turned towards him.

"What happened?" They asked in unison.

"I-," he gulped before starting again, "I looked back and saw something standing at the end of the hallway. It was a shadow, but not like on the floor or even the wall it was just standing there! It didn't look human either, it had like, horns and a tail. It spooked me, but now it's gone. I should have it on camera though."

Devon looked cautiously skeptical. Greg however nodded. It was probably one of the states. He had only seen Florida transform (into an alligator monstrosity), but he knew that the other states also had more...inhuman forms. He had no idea what state it might've been, however.

"Let's hope we don't see it again. Come on, this may be the way out." Greg opened the door and...

It was The Statehouse. Or that's what it was supposed to look like. He entered to get a better look at the interior. It was incredibly dark, but Greg could make things out. He recognized it as the entrance hall to The Statehouse, but the walls were scratched up and beaten. There was a shattered vase on the ground. The rug was torn and there looked to be cracks or dents in the wood floor.

"I think I might prefer the yellow hallway." Devon said from behind him as she entered the room.

"Doors gone again," Luke noted.

The door was in fact, gone again. Where the yellow hallway had been was a wall with peeling wallpaper. Greg turned back to the hallway.

"Well, onward, I suppose." The trio set off further into the house.

To call it the Statehouse anymore may have been stretching it. It became abundantly clear as the traveled through the front room that it had been warped. The stairs and elevators had disappeared, and the rooms were no longer the same. They peaked their heads into living room doorway to find it had been replaced by a living room fit for a colonial period piece; thirteen colonies flag and all.

It was the same deal with other rooms. What had once been a bathroom was replaced with a shack that could only generously be called a bedroom. It was smaller than the bathroom and had only a cot, a nightstand, and an old bayonet.

Where the stairs should have been was a hallway, larger than the one they had entered the Statehouse through. Instead of yellow wallpaper it the hard wood paneling from top to bottom, with some wallpaper of various colors hanging onto the walls. It was their only way out as the doors had a continued nasty habit of disappearing on them.

As they walked through the large hallway they started to hear noises. Not just the creaking of the floorboards under their feet - though they tried to keep quiet - but strange animal noises. Growls that could have been laughter from an animal's mouth, screams echoing from far beyond, and squelching noises mixed with chewing.

Greg paused, as did Devon and Luke. The eating noises were getting loud. Whatever was feeding was close. And now they could smell a pungent, awful odor emanating from further down the hallway.

They only had two options: keeping going ahead towards whatever was eating, or go back the way they came. They silently looked at each other to gauge what to do, and their hearts sank when they realized that it was better to go forward. They could see some of what was ahead of them. Where they had come from was suddenly pitch black and seemed to be closing in on them.

They moved to the wall and inched along, trying their hardest not to make any sounds. As they creeped ever closer they realized there was an open door in the wall, but worse, there was something red and sticky looking spilled before it.

They shared another look, all of them more frightened then they had been before. Greg tried to give a reassuring smile to them, which Luke returned - though the fear was still plain in his eyes. Devon meanwhile shot them both a look as though they were insane for trying to keep their cool.

Luke decided to take the lead and pass the door first. He stuffed down a gagging noise as he passed the door. He motioned for the other two follow after him.

Devon and Greg shared a look and nodded, deciding to go at the same time. They passed by the door, Devon keeping her eyes down, but Greg unfortunately chanced a look.

Goat legs and horns, black arms with clawed hands, a devil's tail, and bat wings. Greg didn't need to look at the shirt or beanie to know it was New Jersey. That explained the smell. He also noted that what looked like blood on the floor was pizza sauce. Jersey was ravenously chowing down on a pizza that had fallen on the floor, and judging by the half eaten pizza box it wasn't the only thin he'd chewed on.

Greg would take full credit for what happened next, because it was incredibly stupid.

He snickered.

Jersey immediately shot up with his goat eyes glowing. Greg could feel Devon glaring at him, but they didn't have time to deal with that right now.

"RUN!" Greg shouted, and the three booked it away from the flying goat creature. Jersey was giving some distinctly ungoatlike growls as he flew after them.

Greg could hear the flapping of Jersey's wings and him knocking into the walls. Trying to outrun something that could fly was something that always seemed so easy in movies and TV; but now that he was there, with his heavy equipment in his backpack weighing him down and his friends he had to make sure also survived. He decided that movies and TV could suck it. Luke, with his long legs and athletic nature, had pulled ahead of him and Devon. Greg and Devon were just trying to keep out of Jersey's claw's grasp.

"GREG IF WE DIE BECAUSE OF THIS IT IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" Devon shouted as they ran. Greg didn't dignify it with a response, because anything that came out of his mouth would be pathetic.

"THERE'S ANOTHER PATH! THIS WAY!" Luke cried out as he turned to the left. Greg didn't know when the hallway had split into more paths, but he wasn't about to complain. Devon turned left with Luke, but Greg found himself held back.

"SHIT!" Jersey had gotten a hold of his backpack. Greg struggled against him, but that became harder when Jersey lifted him into the air. He tried to elbow him and kicked out his legs, but Jersey was undeterred. Whatever Greg could do Jersey could completely shake it off.

Jersey's goat legs kicked back on his legs and he scratched Greg's cheek. Greg tried to elbow him once more but Jersey - the maniac - bit down on his elbow with teeth that were obviously not meant for a goat.

Greg screamed out in pain and didn't hear Luke and Devon calling out his name. Suddenly something large and black was launched at Greg and Jersey, knocking Jersey out of the air and Greg out of Jersey's arm. Incidentally making him land flat on his face.

"Greg are you okay?" Luke worried over Greg, not thinking of Jersey behind them.

Greg didn't have the time to say, I think my nose is broken and Jersey took a bite out of me. Devon interjected, "Worry later, keep running!" She grabbed them by their arms and pulled them up to keep running.

Devon's backpack was sent flying as Jersey snarled at them and gave chase once more. They ran further and further into the dark, hoping they could at least lose him in it. Of course that was not the case. They could hear how close Jersey's growls were and they kept narrowly avoiding his claws.

Luke knocked into something, "Ow! A dead end!"

Devon stopped in her tracks, but Greg's momentum was to strong and he kept running past them. What? The two looked confused at him.

Greg noticed the fast approaching Jersey so he grabbed them by their shirts, "It's a doorway, get in!" Luke had been slightly to the side and bumped into the wall, not the door.

He dragged them into the endlessly dark room and hoped Jersey couldn't fit his wings through it. Unfortunately, he could and looked about ready to plunge down to them, but something gave him pause. It was hard to see his face in the dark - sans his eyes, which were now filled with something that looked like fear. He flew off back the way he came and the trio sighed with relief.

"You think we scared him off?" Luke asked as he caught his breath.

"Not likely," Devon panted out. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and turned on her flashlight. At least they could see the doorway now.

A small smile graced Greg's lips, before falling quickly. The hairs on his neck prickled.

"Hold my hands. Don't look back. We're going to walk out of here like everything is normal and safe," Greg whispered to Devon and Luke. They both looked at him confused, but did as asked. Devon took his right hand and Luke took his left. They began to walk in tandem, pretending nothing was wrong.

Greg had gotten that horrible feeling again like at the door to the Statehouse. Except worse. Whatever was behind them in the dark was big, dangerous, and it new they were there.

Greg remembered his mother reading him a book as a kid and it saying, "You must never run from anything immortal, it attracts their attention." It suddenly seemed like good advice to live by.

They were nearing the door once more, when a honeyed and distorted voice rang out, "Gregory. You ssstay here."

All three froze immediately. Devon and Luke's hands gripped around his tighter.

The voice spoke once more, "Your...friendsss may wait outssside for you. Nothing will harm them. I jussst want to talk."

Gregory gulped, hoping to rid himself of some of his fears. "It's okay, you two go on ahead. I'll be fine." He gave them what he desperately hoped was a reassuring smile.

The two reluctantly let go of his hands and carried on. In Devon's flashlight they could see a large, black, scaly tail with star designs move out of the doorway. They hadn't even know it had been there. Greg stood alone in the dark as Devon's flashlight disappeared. Although he knew they were just outside, he couldn't see any trace of them.

The voice continued, "Why have you come here, Gregory?"

He couldn't see who it was behind him, and the distortion on its voice made it hard to figure out tone, but he got the distinct feeling that it was holding itself back from attacking him.

He answered honestly, "The producers said we had to film tonight. A sort of states' bed routine segment. We didn't know."

"Hmmmm," the creature responded behind him.

Greg felt himself get bolder, "What happened? The house is contorted, Jersey attacked us as the Jersey Devil, and-and there is clearly something deeply wrong."

The creature hummed again, before answering. "Nacht der Volksgeissster."

"Nacht der Volksgeister?" Greg repeated in clumsy German.

"Mhm. Every twenty yearsss we are overtaken by our, bassse instinctsss you could sssay. We are what we are truly. We are inhuman and sssupernatural. We are persssonifcationsss. We've never had sssuch a transssformation in the Statehoussse."

"Oh." Greg responded intelligently.

Silence stretched between him and the one behind him. He clenched his fist.

"So, you and the others become dangerous." When he said this he clutched his bitten elbow.

"Very," The entity behind him stated.

"Are you the strongest one here? Jersey was scared of you." Greg asked.

The entity chuckled darkly behind him. It didn't say anything, but Greg knew what that chuckle meant. The answer was a resounding "yes."

"So. Could we stay here? You said nothing would harm Devon and Luke. We would be safe."

The chuckling stopped. "No. It isss taking all I have not to dessstroy you for encroaching on my territory."

"Oh."

"I recommend finding sssomewhere sssafe to hide. We become more...erratic...asss the night goesss on."

"Okay, okay," Greg breathed out.

"Now. Leave."

"Yes sir," Greg answered as he walked out of the room, making sure not to run.

He exited the room where he was immediately pounced on by Devon and Luke.

"Are you okay bro?"

"What did it want?"

"Do you need me to fight it dude?"

"Greg you're bleeding!"

"No, no," Greg interrupted them, "These were from Jersey, not him. He wanted to know why we were here and I got some information from him."

"He?" Devon questioned.

"Um." he didn't want them to know he had figured out who it was in the other room. "Let me fill you in on what's going on." As he explained to them the situation he could see Luke getting nervous and Devon look pissed.

"So basically," she started after he finished his explanation, "We've been sent as sacrificial lambs."

"What?" Luke and him asked.

"Oh come on, isn't it obvious? They sent us to film a night episode for the first time and it just so happened to coincide with this rare event? They didn't want us to film the states brushing their teeth or putting on face masks, they just wanted to collect footage of them in monster form from our corpses!" She eyed the camera Luke had been holding the entire time.

"Oh," Luke responded dully.

"Yeah, oh," She bit back.

"Okay, well, it doesn't matter right now. What matters is that we get out of here with our lives. Let's try to avoid any states and find a way out. If we can't then let's find somewhere safe to hunker down." He looked to Devon and Luke to gauge their responses. They both nodded in agreement and the three resumed their trek through the house.

Maybe it was because they were looking for it now, but they noticed more mismatched rooms. Colonial bedrooms, gilded age foyers, Victorian drawing rooms, chamber pot rooms...

At one point they were stopped in their tracks by a strange smell. Not strange because it smelled weird, but because it had no business being inside a house. It was the smell of the ocean.

"Woah, look over here dudes." Luke waved them over to a room. Through a large door in the hallway they could see what looked to be a boat shack. There was a small deck and then, with Devon's flashlight, they could see sea water black as the night. It sounded like there was a bell in the distance and the sounds of boats creaking in the ocean wind. Cold air blew out from the room.

"You wanna check it out?" Luke asked with a smile. He probably thought they might get to surf some waves in that room.

"I'm still trying to figure out how the ocean made its way into the house." The trio approached it cautiously, when something made it's way out of the water.

Four large, dark teal tentacles rose up from the water. Each one found a corner of the entrance and wrapped itself around it, an intimidation tactic. The message was very clear, "Fuck off."

"...Let's find somewhere else to explore, how does that sound?" Devon asked. Luke and Greg quickly agreed and they sped away from the boat shack that had no business being in the house.

As they were walking away they stopped in their tracks. Standing at the end of the hallways was a dark figure horns and tail, watching them with golden eyes.

"That's what I saw!" Luke exclaimed, and Devon and Greg turned to look at him. They suddenly realized that might have been a bad idea, but when they looked back the state was gone.

"It was closer than it was last time..." Luke continued anxiously.

"Which state was that Greg?" Devon asked him.

Greg shrugged. He could make some guesses, but the look he'd gotten at them hadn't been good enough. It had horns and a tail, that could be a lot of states.

Their walk continued. The Statehouse continued to distort around them. The strange, out of time rooms became more plentiful. More closed doors started appearing. They weren't sure if these doors were safe or not, but they did try some of them based on vibes mostly.

They tried to get only a small look into the rooms to decide if they should go inside, but one door they tried somehow managed to trap them inside. They'd tried to peak in and the next thing they knew the door had disappeared behind them. None of them could even remember stepping fully into the room.

This room was odd, as most of them were. It was a ramshackle one room house with barely any furniture in it, save a cot, a rocking chair, a dresser, a table set for two, and an old wood oven. Yet it had a comforting feel. There were sounds outside like birds singing and water running.

"It's small," Devon noted.

"You think we could stay here?" Luke asked.

Greg went over to the window to look outside. He blinked in surprise. This definitely wasn't LA.

They'd been dropped into a completely different time. The trees were thick and bountiful, there was a stream running through the area and, wow, Greg hadn't realized how clear water could look.

"Now that's bizarre."

"Could we break open the windows?" Devon asked as she set her phone down on the table to illuminate the room more.

"One way to find out," Luke said with a smirk as he cracked his knuckles. And then immediately threw a punch at the window. It didn't budge a bit.

"Ow!"

"Did you really think you could break open a window with one punch?" Greg snarked.

"I've done it before," Luke pouted, abashed.

"It wouldn't matter anyway. Whatever is out there isn't LA. I don't think it's even 2022." He gestured at the scenery out the window.

Devon and Luke nodded. Luke suddenly seemed distracted.

"Was that hallway always there?" He pointed to the corner of the room where a hallway that definitely wasn't there before had appeared.

Devon spoke up, "...Who votes we don't investigate it?" She raised her hand.

"And that we do investigate it?" Luke and Greg raised their own.

"I'm going to get killed because of you two," she sniped, even as she picked her phone up to illuminate the hallway. Greg and Luke at least had the decency to look sheepish about it.

The hallways was small and cramped at the start, and only got more so as they went down. Eventually they were all following one after another, Devon in the front, Greg in the middle, and Luke pulling up the rear.

Greg's nose twitched. "Does anyone else smell burning?"

Devon shook her head, "No, but I can't be the only one hearing that right?" She looked back and saw Greg and Luke giving her confused looks. "It's...distant yelling and metal clanging. You seriously don't hear that?"

"I don't hear or smell either of that, but I can taste soot on my tongue," Luke responded.

"How do you know what that tastes like?" Greg asked incredulously.

"You don't know my life."

Devon shushed them, "Y'all shut up. The hallway opens up."

They spilled out into the room to see what was in it. The room was empty, but there was another opening to another room. Or rather, there was an entrance down into a black mine.

"Oh...maybe we should leave." Greg gestured for them to leave.

Devon for once did not agree. "I can still hear those people, they could be trapped." She shined her light down into the mine and-

Was immediately pounced on something human sized, but furry and bug-like. She screamed and grappled with it as kept fighting with her for something. Luke tried to pull it off her, but found himself whacked by a large wing. Greg felt around himself looking for something to pacify it.

Devon got a lucky shot with an elbow to the creature's face, stunning it. She pushed herself away and tried to escape. The creature - West Virginia it was clear - tried to pounce on her again, but Luke leaped onto him. West Virginia tried to throw him off, but Luke got him in a headlock and pinned his wings down with his knees.

"Does anyone have a lighter?" Greg yelled out.

"Why on Earth would we need a lighter!" He heard Devon yell from where she was in the hallway.

"I've got one in my back pocket but I'm kinda busy!" Luke yelled back as West Virginia freed one of his wings and slapped Luke with it.

Greg ran behind the two wrestling on the floor and tried desperately to avoid West Virginia's flailing legs and free wing. He really didn't want to think of what West Virginia's legs looked like in this form. He reached for Luke's right pocket and hoped that it was the right one because having to feel around his back pocket was weird enough without feeling two of them.

He felt around for the lighter and thanked his lucky stars that he'd gotten it right. He wrenched it out and ran in front of West Virginia, lighting it up in his face. West Virginia immediately started to freak out even more at the shine of it.

"Let him go, Luke." Luke looked reluctant but did as told. As soon as Luke let West Virginia go Greg threw the lighter into the mine and West Virginia dashed down for it. Greg and Luke dashed back up the hallway before he could come back, Luke grabbing the equipment he'd set down so he could grapple West Virginia. 

In the hallways he heard Luke pant out triumphantly, "I just fought Mothman...And I have it on camera holy shit-"

"I already fought the Jersey Devil, you're not special." Greg smirked back at Luke.

"We're just two regular cryptid fighters. Oh, we should have a show! Cryptid Fighters: The Series!" Greg could practically hear Luke sparkling, he chuckled.

"Only if we make it out of here alive."

"Hey off topic, but bro did you cop a feel back there?" Greg stopped in tracks and Luke bumped into his backpack.

"Um...if I did it was an accident?" He really hadn't meant to cop a feel, but he had been looking for a lighter in his back pocket.

Luke laughed good naturedly. "It's chill man, I was just curious." Greg sighed with relief.

The two found Devon waiting for them in, well it wasn't West Virginia's old house anymore. It looked more like something out of Alice in Wonderland. The room had gotten taller and now was covered head to toe in different doors. Upside down doors, tiny doors, sideways doors, and not a single one normal.

"Took y'all long enough. I told you we shouldn't have investigated." She turned her nose up at them.

"And I told you we should leave the room with the mine, but somebody shined their light directly at Mothman. So we're both stupid," Greg sniped back at her.

She flushed and looked back at the doors, "Which one should we go through?"

"Whichever one has the best vibes?" Luke suggested. Greg and Devon looked at each other and shrugged. They didn't really have any better options. Devon gestured for Luke to pick for them.

Luke drifted around the room looking at the doors, before stopping at a sideways door that looked to be made of bamboo. Luke gave an affirmative nod and pointed at it.

"And how do we get through a sideways door?" Devon challenged.

Luke did not seem deterred. He got the door open and crawled through it. Greg shrugged and followed after. Devon sighed and followed after them.

They didn't have to crawl for long, quickly the door opened up into a something open and beautiful.

They were inside some sort of cave, except it was covered in soft grass and moss. Flowers lined the walls and butterflies flittered about. They looked around in awe.

"Wow." Devon didn't even have the ability to give a smart quip.

Luke smirked, "I told you. Good vibes."

They ventured further into the cave and saw that it opened into a larger cavern. As they entered it they were suddenly struck by a horrible heat emanating from it.

"Now does anyone want to tell me how a bunch haoles got into my sanctuary?" All the three of them were stunned into silence.

The cavern was large and beautiful, with even more flora lining walls and a crystal clear pool in the middle of it all. What had them stunned was the woman inside. Her top half was a creature of fire; her body of volcanic rock sculpted into the visage of a beautiful Hawaiian woman. Her nails were clawed, her eyes were living fire, but most striking of all was her hair, a long bubbling train of molten rock. Though it did not burn the grass underneath it, the trio knew that if they dared get to close it would burn them. She was decorated in armor and wore a lei around her neck. The bottom half of her was long mermaid's tail made out of grass and moss, flowers lining it, and the fins looked to be made of palm tree leaves.

"Oh, um," was all that Greg could intelligently get out. He felt justified in his inability to speak since both Devon and Luke were just as flushed as he was.

"All three of you leave before I-" she finally got a good look at them, "Oh, hi Greg."

"H-hi! Hawai'i. It's um," he reached for something to say, "Lovely night we're having?"

She raised a volcanic eyebrow at him. "Hang on a second. How the hell did you get here?"

Luke jumped in, "We found a sideways bamboo door in the Statehouse and we just walked through it! Well, crawled. I found it cause y'know it had good vibes."

She acknowledged him while he spoke, but turned away when he was done. "Dammit, I thought I cut off my connection from that damned place. What's it going to take for it to get the fucking hint?"

"Um...Hawai'i? If I could ask something?"

She looked back over at them, "Yes?"

"Tonight is apparently Nacht der Volksgeister-"

"Pō e Hele ana Mokupuni, that is what my people called it. Go on."

"Right," Greg took in a deep breath, "It's a bit dangerous in the statehouse, do you think we could stay here?"

Her face was made of volcanic rock and her eyes of fire, but he knew she was giving him a deadpan stare. "I like you Greg, but did you really expect any other answer to that question than no?"

He sighed, "No, but I figured it might be worth a shot. Thanks for not blasting us with lava. We'll see ourselves out."

Luke gave a disappointed noise, but Greg shut him up with a look. They were not going to keep intruding on Hawai'i's space of all states.

As they left they heard Hawai'i's voice again. "Hang on Greg, come back here."

"Fuuuck," he said under his breath. What was with cryptids calling him back to talk them? Devon and Luke gave him looks that were equal parts pitying and exasperation.

He reentered the cavern and Hawai'i spoke without looking at him, "You see that patch of hibiscus on the wall?" She gestured in the direction of it and Greg went over to it, "Reach into it."

Greg gulped, but did as told, hoping to God this wasn't some murder plot. He reached through the hibiscus, not finding anything for a while.

"You know, you should have seen me in my prime Greg. I was so large and powerful. And I had legs," she rubbed a clawed hand over her tail, "It wasn't until the haoles came that my legs turned to a tail. I miss them."

Her tone was melancholic, and Greg completely understood. He kept feeling around in the patch of hibiscus, and finally his hand wrapped around something soft. He pulled it out through the hibiscus, not sure how it all fit in there, but not questioning it.

It was a large, handmade quilt decorated in designs of hibiscus and forget-me-nots on the outside, whales in the next ring, and a moose with a bat on its head in the middle.

He looked over at Hawai'i confused, she still did not look at him, "When you see Alaska, give that to him."

Greg tilted his head at her, "When?"

"Go on Greg, your friends are waiting."

It was a clear dismissal, so he folded the quilt up, stuffed it in his backpack, and left the cavern for the sideways door.

"What did she want?" Devon asked.

He waved her off, "Just wanted me to grab something, come on, let's get out of here," and slipped back through the door. 

The room of Alice in Wonderland doors was still there, although now there was a normal door amid all the warped and uneven doors. This door was large, not just tall, but also wide. Luke and Devon reentered the room after him and stared at the door with him.

Devon spoke up, "This is almost certainly a trap."

"Yep." Greg answered.

"It's daring us to go through it."

"Most certainly."

"Going through it is probably a bad idea. Especially when we have this room seems safe."

"Yeah. We should-"

"Yoink," Luke interjected, opening the door.

Devon and Greg shared a look.

Greg broke the silence, "Alright, let's do this."

The room they walked into was small, smaller than the door would indicate. It was old just as West Virginia's had been, but other than that it did not resemble the Appalachian home. This one had a cross up on the wall and a small icon of the Virgin Mary underneath it on a side table. There was also a gun atop the wall.

Devon snickered, "You could say it's-you could say it's small-" her snickering kept up, "Smaller on the inside?"

Luke and Greg looked at her sheepish but unrepentant smile. "A doctor who reference? Seriously? You are such a neEEER-AH-"

He'd stepped forward while still talking to her and something under his foot had been round and caused him to slip. Luckily, Luke was there to catch him. Greg tried to catch his breath.

"That's what you get for nerd-shaming like the hypocrite your are," Devon scolded him.

"What did you slip on?" Luke asked gently.

Greg let himself out of Luke's arms and looked down at the floor. There was a small, glowing blue ball with a violet ring around it. He cautiously picked it up and held it in his hands. It  didn't attack him, like he had expected, instead he got a...feeling. A warm, fuzzy feeling. It calmed him down.

"Greg, put the ball down. Pretty much everything in this house is evil." Greg swerved his head over to Devon.

"What, no they aren't! And especially not this thing. I can't explain it, but it's just really nice. It's good vibes, like Luke said. Hold it." He held it out for Devon to take.

"What no, I refuse-"

"I'll do it!" And Luke snatched the ball from his hands. He blinked his eyes in shock.

"Oh man this is like, the goodest vibes. Devon you gotta try it." He also held it out for her.

She took a step back, "What, no! First of all don't make it sound like drugs, and second of all it could be luring you into a false sense of security!"

"But..." Luke tilted his head at her innocently, "I don't want to put it down, and neither does Greg, so, like, you gotta take it from me so it can be put down."

Devon eyed it suspiciously, "...Fine." Greg couldn't believe that actually worked and he could see the shit eating grin Luke was wearing on his face.

She took the ball from his as carefully as she could without fully holding it. When she held it she smirked, "Yeah, see, it's easy to resi-oh."

He face went bright red as she looked down at the orb.

"Yeah see! It just, like, exudes good vibes." Luke said emphasizing with his hands.

"Oh! Yeah that too, yup!" Devon's voice suddenly pitched up when she said this.

"Wait...Did it say something to you?" Greg looked between Devon and the orb.

"What?! No! Why would a ball speak to me that's crazy talk!" She was definitely blushing and not as good a liar as she thought.

"It did! What did it say!" Both Greg and Luke crowded her as she blushed something even fiercer.

"I-"

The small house was suddenly shook with the force of the most powerful snore he'd heard in his lifetime.

The snore stopped, but then started back up again. Not quite as loud as the first time, but still annoying to hear.

"...We should probably get out here."

"Well the door moved and chances are it's taking us towards the snoring so it's either stay here and deal with it or brave getting near it and possibly escaping." Devon nodded her head over to the other wall, and indeed the door had moved. It also didn't fit in the house so the top of it was cut off by the roof. Greg couldn't help but chuckle at that. 

"I say we brave it," Greg stated. The others nodded and walked towards the door.

Before they left the room, Devon stuffed the orb in Greg's hoodie pocket. "For safekeeping," She explained.

They left through the door and found themselves in a much larger house. This one looked much more like a mansion, although they'd been deposited into a hallway that looked to be on a higher floor.

There was only one way to go, so they followed it.

The amount of crosses on the wall had increased - along with guns. There now some portraits on the walls, and Greg stopped at one.

The face had been torn off, but the body looked to be a wealthy Spanish man, judging from the armor and regalia he wore. Didn't look American at all to Greg. He shrugged and walked on with the other two.

The snoring just kept getting louder as they went down the hallway. Now that Greg was getting closer he noticed it sounded like it wasn't coming from a human, but instead an animal. At least now they could see an open room, which presumably held the state snoring. A strong, burning, red light spilled out of the room.

They tried to pass by as quietly as they could. While the snoring was loud enough that it should cover up whatever sound was around it, there was no telling with the states. Luke passed first, then Greg. Greg peeked into the room, but the light was so strong he could not make out any shape. He turned away and kept walking.

Devon passed last, and just as she was home free the floorboard under her foot creaked.

Everyone stood stock still, hoping that the state hadn't heard them. But unfortunately, the snoring had finally ceased, to no one's relief.

Once more Greg had that awful feeling of being prey, and he didn't wait to grab Luke and Devon's hands and yell out, "RUN!"

Just as the sped away from the room the red light burst through the walls and chased after them. A smell followed after it like sulfur and gasoline.

The hallway twisted and contorted before their eyes as the creature chased them. No longer was it the old mansion they had been in, but instead the Statehouse hallway they'd been in before, twisting and turning before their very eyes as they ran from the beast.

Greg chanced a glance behind them and saw just who it was.

Texas, in all his mighty Minotaur glory had grown two more feet with his new bull head and horns, an was all awash in ethereal red flame with crude oil dripping from his horns and body. Smoke blew up from his nostrils. There was also a small, strange void in his chest.

Greg tried not to focus on how Texas was also incredibly shirtless, and still wearing jeans meant for a much smaller body and his boots.

Texas let out a horrible bellow, spitting crude oil as he roared. That shocked Gregory back into focus, snapping back to look away from him.

The flames spread across the crude oil and onto the walls and floor beneath their feet. Smoke filled their vision and their lungs as they tried to make their way through the flames that were just growing higher and higher. The crude oil that wasn't on fire was causing them to slip and almost fall into the fire. Texas's size was causing the the roof to crack and it seemed like he might take it down all on his own.

Greg suddenly went into a coughing fit from all the smoke and could barely run, could barely see, the walls were closing in on him and breaking apart. He was falling, he was inhaling the fire, he was on fire, he was the fire.

"GREG!"

"GAH!" Greg cried out as he found himself thrown into a wall, a cool hand grabbed his shoulder to steady him. His coughing began to subside and his vision return.

Devon was next to him, holding him up and looking worriedly at the wall. A dead end, they'd come upon a dead end. How did he get thrown into the wall?

He looked and saw Luke in front of him breathing heavily, clutching his burnt arm. A glowing, bull like form came through the smoke behind Luke.

"Luke, no!" Greg and Devon yelled out at the same time, holding out their hands.

But something distracted Texas and the humans. The blue orb that the trio had picked up had fallen to the ground - probably when Luke threw him into the wall - and was now glowing even fiercer.

Suddenly, the orb began to unroll itself, growing larger and larger, revealing a humanoid cryptid. The head looked similar to that of a coyote's, it had bat wings, and a violet halo behind it's head. It stood up from the floor to look between the surprised parties. It turned to the Devon and Greg, an smiled. It brought two fingertips to its lips and blew a kiss in Devon's direction, before it crawled across the floor.

It proceeded to climb up Texas like a tree before stretching itself across his chest and...somehow rolling back up into a ball and inserting itself in the void in Texas's chest.

Texas's demeanor immediately changed, the anger seemed to dissipate from him. He sighed out in satisfaction, and just left. He turned and walked away, back through the flames. The flames and smoke and oil didn't last long after he left. Disappearing from sight as if they'd never been there.

The burns lasted though, Luke's arm stilled looked to be in bad condition.

"Luke, thank you. What did you even do?" Greg asked as he went to inspect Luke's arm.

Luke smiled through the pain. "You fell behind. There was some roof that was falling down and it would have hit you on the head. So I threw you out of the line of fire. I didn't have time to get out of the way myself." He winced when Greg touched his arm in a particular area. "Don't tell me I shouldn't have done it, because I would do it again in a heartbeat bro." They smiled at each other silently.

Devon broke the silence. "We really need to get both of you checked out and healed up." She frowned with worry.

Greg tried to laugh her off, "Hey, we should be focused on Luke only, I can barely feel the bite anymore."

Devon shook her head at the two of them. "You both need help." She gestured to the wall, where a door had finally appeared, "Let's try to find something useful in this hellscape, alright guys?"

They nodded and followed her through the door, but were stunned at what they saw.

"Woooah, did we make it out dudes?"

The door had opened up into a large forest. The trees were thick and the roots innumerable. The air was clean and smelled like peace. So many stars glittered through the small openings in the thick canopy.

"Not likely, it's probably like Hawai'i's place. But it's nice, let's go." He started to lead the way, but Devon cut in front of him, waggling her phone in front of him. It would have to die soon, but for now she was working as their source of light.

They began to walk through the woods. Greg found himself nervous. He could hear chittering, chirping, and cawing, but all of it was in the distance. Nothing around them made noise sans the sticks underneath their feet. It was like all signs of life were just out of reach.

He grabbed Devon's right hand and Luke's left. He glared at Luke's right hand. Despite one of his arms being busted, he still insisted on filming all of these events.

Devon looked back at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Hey Greg...what's with the hand holding?"

Greg felt a blush on his cheeks, "It's nothing weird! I just think it would be easier to keep track of each other if we're holding hands. That way we don't get lost."

Luke gave a firm nod, "Makes sense to me."

Devon seemed to agree with the two of them, but was still skeptical. "Okay, but what if we need to run again?"

Before Greg could answer a voice shouted out, "RUN RUN RUN!"

It was a strange voice. It sounded like someone was impersonating Devon. Her accent and her deep feminine voice, but it couldn't get all the details right. It was a mockery of an echo.

"What was that?!" Devon shouted back. The trio began to look around.

"WHAT WAS THAT?! WHAT WAS THAT?!" The voice repeated again in it's impression of Devon.

"Where is it coming from?" Luke asked.

"WHERE WHERE WHERE?!" Now it impersonated Luke, except Luke's impersonation was worse. It had gone all in on the dudebro voice and made Luke sounded like an idiot.

"Shit," Greg muttered under his breath.

"SHIT SHIT SHIT SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT-" The voice continued in it's Greg voice, which made him sound much more like a coward and was an awful attempt at a New York accent, getting louder and more erratic.

It had be somewhere, and on a whim he looked up at the trees. Had the stars gotten closer?

No, wait. His blood ran cold. Those weren't stars. They were diamonds.

"RUN!" He yelled out as he pulled Devon and Luke along.

"RUNRUNRUNRUNRUNRUNRUNRUNRUNRUNRUN-"

However, it quickly became clear that running along with each other in this thick forest was not a good plan. Especially when the state was following them from the branches. Greg didn't want to, but it would be easier for Devon and Luke to run if they weren't holding hands with them. He let go, and the three all ran in different directions.

"KEEP GOING THE SAME DIRECTION GUYS!" Greg cried out to the two.

"GUYGUYSGUYSGUYSGUYS-"

Shit, he was still right behind them and copying them.

"GAH!" Greg heard a voice cry out, and he recognized it as Luke.

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH-" the state above repeated his cry, but elongated. Then Greg noticed that he was attempting to run across the branches to where Luke was. No, absolutely not.

He grabbed a rock and through it at the states head. It hit and that got his attention for sure; problem was that Greg had no idea what he was going to do now that he had it.

The state leaped down from the treetop right in front of him, standing in front of him at full height. His arms and legs were made of tree wood, diamonds decorated his body, and atop his head were large branch antlers with pine leaves and diamonds across it - creating the image of a twisted crown.

"...Could I persuade you not to attack me?" He asked nervously.

"ATTACKATTACKATTACKATTACKATTACK-" And the state left at him, antlers first. Greg darted out of the way and resumed running.

"WHERE ARE YOU GUYS?" He heard Devon shout across the forest.

"YOU GUUUUUUUUYS" The state roared out in its mockery of Devon's voice.

Greg was about to respond to Devon, when something wrapped around his foot a pulled him down. Greg turned around and saw that it was the state behind him, pulling him back to him with his branch-like hands - that he had somehow elongated.

"No no no!" Greg grabbed another rock as he was pulled and smashed the branches with it

"NONONONONONONONONONO-" the state screamed as his branches were broke and Greg took off running again.

As he managed to put some distance between him and the state ran into Luke, literally. He barrled into him and sent them falling through the brush and out the other side.

Both of them groaned with pain as Devon ran over to them. She pulled them apart gently and and looked over them.

"Are you two alright?" She asked.

Before they could answer a voice came from the trees, "Alright alright alright."

It was most subdued the state had spoken this entire time. It hadn't even attempted an impression, just speaking its normal southern twang. They looked up to see it smiling down at them from the treeline. It then returned to the forest. Greg finally took in his surroundings, they were out of the forest and in some sort of wheat field.

They managed to stand, Luke cradling his burnt arm which was now probably in worse shape after the tumble they'd taken.

It was strange. The states were all monsters or cryptids now, yet the scenery they kept being dropped in was gorgeous. The wheat field was a sea of amber and the sky was endless. He could see the arc of the milky way and every star the American sky had ever known before light pollution had tainted it. There was even the Aurora Borealis flickering in and out of view.

"Wow."

"Seconded," Devon said as she led Luke over. He blinked as he saw her flannel that she had been wearing the whole time was now wrapped around Luke's arm, leaving her just in her white t-shirt.

"Come on, let's try and find another door."  He motioned for them to follow.

The wheat field started out at their knees, but as they continued it rose higher and higher, eventually coming up to their waists. There was a silence in the air, only the small sounds of white blowing in the soft wind.

As Greg was walking he suddenly felt his foot sink into something sticky. He pulled his foot out and looked down, thinking it was just mud.

But when he pulled his hand back from the ground he went completely still. His hand was now coated in red and the sent of iron lingered heavy in the air. He turned to Devon and Luke who had made similar discoveries.

He pushed through the wheat to see if they were somehow walking on a dead body holy shit - but saw that it was so much worse. The ground itself was bleeding. Blood was seeping through the soil. He could even see puss. Greg fought to keep down the bile in his throat.

Tha-thump

He tried to steady his beating. His heart was beating to loudly. He reached behind and Devon took his hand as she looked around in worry. The squelching under their feet was awful.

Tha-thump

Why couldn't he just calm down? Yes he was trapped in a building with monsters who were also his friends and they were all set on killing him for existing, but he'd been able to keep his head until now. What was wrong with him?

Tha-thump. Tha-thump.

His heartbeat was deafening, and it was getting harder to breathe. His shoes were sinking into the bloodied ground.

Tha-thump. Tha-thump.

"Greg," he registered Devon talking to him, "Greg breathe with me." She breathed in and he breathed with her. When she breathed out he breathed out with her. They repeated this a few times. Finally, Greg felt okay.

Tha-thump. Tha-thump. Tha-thump.

And now he could realize that that heartbeat was not his own.

Tha-thump.

"Let's get out of here. Now." He pulled Devon and Luke to escape the bleeding wheat field, but were stopped by what they saw standing there.

A scarecrow stood behind them. Its face was distorted and its mouth was full of human teeth, but even worse was its chest. It wore and old flannel that had been unbuttoned, but instead of hay inside of it, it was a rib cage with a throbbing beating heart inside of it. It tilted its head at them.

All three of them took off in different directions, hoping that it would confuse the scarecrow or make it lose interest in them. It was undeterred however, walking calming in the direction Devon had ran in.

Greg ran as fast as he could through the wheat. The terrain was bloody and slowing him down, as was the massive sea of wheat he was running through. Now it seemed almost like the sea, the wind had picked up and it was trying to trap him, sink him.

As he ran he tried to find Luke and Devon. Luke, despite his injury was making good process to getting out, nearing the end of the field. He turned his head and watched as the scarecrow, which had only been walking briskly before but had somehow caught up to her and snatched her up by neck and began to squeeze.

Greg's heart dropped into his stomach and control left his body. He raced to them at top speed. It didn't matter what happened to him so long as he could save her. He leaped at the scarecrow and rammed his body into its. His bones rattled as he hit the scarecrow's skeleton. He rolled off it quickly and crawled over to help Devon up, uncaring of the blood from the ground that was seeping into his clothes. He could still feel his mind reeling from what just happened.

"Come on, come on." Blood covered her just as it now covered him.

As she was standing up the scarecrow's hand shot out, wrapping around her right ankle and twisting. She screamed in pain as the scarecrow rose up and stood them down. Its skeletal hand removed itself from her ankle.

"RUN!" He screamed as he pulled Devon away. She limped along as they ran and eventually Greg maneuvered his arm so he holding her up as they were running, the scarecrow still following them at its leisurely pace. Greg could see the end just in sight, although relief did not last as he realized behind it was a corn maze.

Luke ran towards them from end grabbing Devon by her other side and helping them cross out of it. Devon yelled at him something about not injuring himself further for her.

They all collapsed to the ground as they cross out of the wheat field, the scarecrow above watching them. Just watching.

Luke turned to Devon, "What happened to your foot? Are you okay to walk?" Devon tenderly put her foot down as she tried to stand.

She gasped with a grimace and felt down into Luke's arms. "I think, I think it's sprained. That fucking state had it out for me I swear to god." Luke used his good arm as he helped her walk over to the entrance of the corn maze. Greg joined them and anxiously played with his backpack straps.

"Please tell me there is a way around this?" Devon asked, barely hidden panic in her voice. No one answered because they all already knew the answer. Just as before the corn maze seemed to stretch on for miles. At least the light of the stars helped them to see.

Devon sighed. "Okay, let's get it over with then."

The three followed the signs all with messages written in 'mysterious' red ink. "THIS WAY TO START!" "FUN FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY!" "NO MURDER TO BE HAD!" "SOYBEAN MAZE NEXT YEAR!"

They came to the first fork in the road, with three exits to take. Just as they were about to decide the direction to take, three figures came down each path.

The left path had a man with gray, dead skin moving slowly towards them. Its eye sockets and mouth were empty voids. It carried with it a large scythe, giving a grim reaper impression.

The cryptid in the center looked like a bird, if you had never seen a bird before. It reminded Greg of those images of modern animals if they were shrink-wrapped like dinosaurs. Most of it's body was scaly and moved like a bird, but the head was clearly a hawk's, still full of feathers.

The third on the right path was a furry, bipedal creature with several small sets of deer antlers atop its head. Though it walked on two feet it crouched down once it stopped approaching them.

The human trio silently stared at cryptid trio before them. Greg clenched and unclenched his hand. The cryptids before them did not move, just staring.

"...I think they want us to play." Greg said quietly.

Luke shook his head. "I don't want us to separate again. We get hurt every time."

"Then," Devon entered the conversation, "We just go together. Which looks safest?"

None of them looked particularly safe, but if he had to choose; the husk with the scythe somehow looked the safest. He led them over to the left path, but the husk blocked their way, motioning to the other cryptids. The husk wanted them to separate.

Greg gulped and approached the husk and spoke out, "We're injured, you're not. It's still fair."

The husk tilted its head at them, then looked over to the other two and conversed with them in a strange rasp. The hawk cawed something out and the furry creature gurgled in turn.

The husk moved out of their way, indicating for them to go down his path together. As they walked down it Greg's ears twitched when he heard the husk rasping again. He couldn't understand the rasp, but the pattern sounded familiar. It had the same lilt as when a person counted down from ten.

"Shit. We gotta speed up. It's going to give chase soon." Devon and Luke didn't question how he knew, they simply sped up their gait.

Greg heard the final rasp just as the corn field started to split off into different directions. They choose a path to the right and started sprinting as well as they could through the maze, taking twists and turns hoping to evade the husk.

They reached a fork in the road and Greg spotted the glimmer of the scythe in the starlight come down one of the paths. He went to guide Devon and Luke down another way, when the bird like entity burst through the corn and knocked into Devon and Luke, sending both of them flying from each other.

"NO!" Greg's eyes shot to another path where the furry monster was prowling over to Luke. Luke scooted away from it and tried to get to Devon, however the bird monster had set its sharp eyes on her. Devon struggled to stand up and the bird was quickly approaching. The husk meanwhile had decided to target Greg.

Something about this night made Greg feel brave and a tad foolhardy. He didn't have much on hand to attack any of the creatures, so he grabbed what was closest to him. He broke off a fresh piece of corn and chucked it at the bird creature's head.

That got it's attention. Along with the husk and the furry beast. All of them stared at him, and Greg got the distinct feeling that he fucked up big time.

All three of them lunged at him and Greg booked it down a random path. He hoped that Devon and Luke wouldn't worry too much and would go on without him. He would catch back up to them. Somehow.

The bird touched down in front of him and sent Greg falling back on his bottom. The husk and the furry creature both approached from behind. He was closed in. The bird snapped its beak at him ferociously.

There was really only way out, and that was to take off into the corn.

The leaves scratched at his face and it was difficult to see, especially when he was trying desperately to make sure nothing took his eye out in the corn. He'd seen people run through corn in movies before, but like most things that night he was being proven wrong. It was not that easy to run through, especially when it was planted so compactly.

Something knocked into him, the bird - he presumed, and sent him sprawling back onto a path. He didn't look behind or around he just took off running directly in front of him, hoping he wasn't somehow running back to the entrances.

The paths were all messed up. It seemed there were no dead ends, just endless circles. He decided to try his luck in the corn again.

He didn't get to run through it as long this time. The sound of metal slicing through the air was his only warning to duck as the husk hacked its scythe through the corn trying to get to him.

He peaked through his fingers and nearly cried with joy. The exit was just past the husk. He looked up, the husk was getting ready to slice down and stab him, standing completely still. Greg smirked.

As the scythe swung down he darted through the husks legs and sprinted through the exit, knocking into two things on accident.

"DEVON! LUKE!" He didn't wait for them to answer, he just squeezed them into a tight hug.

They returned the hug though. Luke enthusiastically and Devon slightly reluctantly.

When they finished with their hug Greg suddenly recalled the corn maze. He swung his head to look back at it and saw, nothing. The corn maze was gone from sight.

Well, it was not accurate to say there was nothing. Instead of the corn maze, or the wheat field, they had been deposited into a snowy forest. Pines stretched to the sky for what seemed like miles, and cold started to settle in fast. Greg's bones were shivering.

He helped Luke and Devon up and they tried to walk through the snow covered forest as best they could. Devon shivered and rubbed her arms, already covered in goosebumps. Greg hoped they could get out soon.

Greg had though there had been nothing in front of him, but suddenly he was bumping into something very soft and stepping back hastily, taking in what he had bumped into.

A large mass of blankets and furs was in their way, but when Greg craned his neck, which he had to do seeing as the creature was almost ten feet tall, he saw its head. Its had large black moose antlers and a polar bears face, with fathomless eyes that reflected the Aurora Borealis. No doubt about it, this was Alaska.

Alaska didn't attack though, in fact he barely moved. He blinked at them, and they blinked back.

Greg suddenly remembered, "Oh, I've got something for you!" He could hear Luke and Devon quietly questioning him as he reached into his backpack. He pulled the quilt from Hawai'i out and held it out to Alaska.

"Hawai'i wanted you to have this."

Alaska stared down at the quilt for a good thirty seconds, before a hand removed itself from his large, thick cloak. The hand was human, with black claws. It look dreadfully pale and frostbitten. Greg couldn't help but be slightly worried. The hand took the quilt and with a blink of Greg's eye the hand was gone and the quilt in the cloak like it had been there its entire existence.

Things remained silent as they just stared at Alaska, before Greg cleared his throat. "Alaska? Do you think you could lead us somewhere safe? Somewhere we can rest for the night?"

Alaska took them in, before turning ever so slowly and walking through the forest. The trio did not have much of a choice but to follow after him. The cold suddenly did not seem so isolating and and suffocating.

Eventually Alaska came to a stop. The trio moved around him and saw a door. A door that Greg recognized as the door leading into the meeting room. Luke brought Devon over to it and opened, smiling brightly and gesturing for Greg to look. It was the meeting room. The lights were dim, but in a warm intimate way, and it looked clean and untouched by the drama of the other states.

Greg turned to Alaska and gave a little bow, "Thank you." He then went to join Luke and Devon in the meeting room, the door shutting behind them.

They all sat down on the couch at the end of the room. The couch did not get much action from the states usually; but with Devon's leg busted, Luke's arm still bit, and Greg bone-tired and scraped up, it seemed like the perfect time to use it.

"Why," Devon started once they were sat at the couch, "Why are there no med kits in this entire godforsaken house?"

Greg shrugged, "They're all immortal, I guess they think they don't need it or something. To be fair I've seen Florida heal from breaking both his arms in a matter of seconds. On the other hand I've also seen South Dakota take two weeks to heal from a fractured wrist so..."

"So?"

He flailed his arms. "I don't know, okay?! I don't have all the answers! I didn't even know about this-" he gestured around the room, "Until like two hours ago! Cut me some slack!"

He sighed heavily and looked over to Luke by the large windows, "You coming Luke?"

Luke nodded and made his way over to them. "I was just checking out the windows. It's completely dark out there. Like we've been taken out of the world or something." He plopped down next to them and swung his good arm over the back of the couch, around Greg's shoulders.

They were quiet, before Devon picked up the controller for the TV. "You think it works?" She turned it on as a test.

Instead of seeing something modern, they were instead bombarded with Nancy Reagan's face giving some sort of interview. The three shared a look and changed the channel. This time it was an episode of I Love Lucy. The next one was the day of JFK's assassination. After that it was an old 80s Saturday morning cartoon and they figured that was as good as they were going to get, so they turned the volume down low and sat with each other.

Luke decided to test the waters, "You think I should use the footage from today to start a cryptid hunting show? That'd be pretty fun right?"

Devon shook her head, "I think I'd rather see that used to keep them locked up or something. I already didn't like them. But seeing them like this? They're dangerous. They're monsters."

Greg frowned at the both of them. "No, no I don't think we should do either of that. I think we should destroy the footage if I'm honest."

Devon and Luke looked at him other baffled. Greg sighed, ready to try and defend himself, but Devon interjected.

"Do you not see what happened to us? They were actively attacking us and you don't want them punished for this?!"

Greg gulped. "No, no I don't. Dammit Devon they really have no control of themselves! That's what Nacht der Volksgeister is all about, that's what they said. They're in their basest instincts and they don't like people in their territory. Yes some of them attacked us, but also there were others who didn't attack us. Hawai'i, Alaska, Austin, and Texas backed off once he had Austin back. I just-. I just don't think it's right. They didn't want to be filmed in this state especially since they can't control themselves. They hurt us, but I know they'll apologize afterwards."

The couch went quiet, and Greg sighed. He knew that Luke and Devon wouldn't agree, and that was fine, but he had to get his thoughts out. He liked the Statehouse. The states were stupid and yet charming in their own way. He liked talking to them and watching them and just being around them. They had given him a job and something to do during the early stages of the pandemic. They'd been a strange almost second family to him for a while now and...dammit he trusted them.

Greg almost laughed at the thought that the states who were currently trying to murder him and his friends were a better family than his dad's.

Devon's head suddenly rested on his shoulder. He looked down and saw that Devon's breathing had evened out she was almost cuddling into him. He blushed, but leaned into Luke's arm around the couch and closed his eyes. They needed rest. Maybe when they woke up it would all be a dream...but hopefully not. He just let the sounds of dumb 80s commercials lull him to sleep.


Something was deeply wrong when he woke up.

He didn't open his eyes, but he could feel it. He was laid down now. Not laid down on the couch, but laid down flat on his back. Something sharp and plantlike was tickling his nose. There sounds in the distance of fire and animalistic noises of revelry.

He dare opened his eyes. He was looking up once more at the abundant night sky from earlier, and was surrounded by tall, dry looking grass. He looked down at himself. Greg had his head rested on Luke's chest and Devon's head rested on Greg's, though they were both stirring. When they woke up they also noticed their predicament they were in.

Greg sat up and peaked over the tall grass, and stifled a loud gasp.

In the distance a blazing bonfire was surrounded by different monster creatures, no doubt the states. He could here them wooping and hollering as they danced around the pyre, though to call it dancing would be generous. They were more contorting their bodies in almost rhythmic displays.

All three of them were watching the scene, collectively thinking, "Shit." They glanced at each other, debating what they should do. Do they bolt? Do they try to sneak out? Do they stay and pray that the states get nowhere near them?

They didn't need to make the decision, because they were suddenly accosted by a reptilian state.

It was clearly Florida, it was still dressed like him, the only difference was his legs and arms were alligator-esque, his smile was too wide for any human face and contained to many teeth, and his eyes. The sclera was bright yellow and his reptilian eyes were bright orange. Greg noted that the tail was also new.

They all tried to shift away from Florida as best they could. Florida had a predatory smile on his face and was watching them with his golden and orange eyes. He then began to snicker to him himself. They tried to seem as nonthreatening to Florida as possible, but it didn't work.

Florida flung his head backwards and began to shout in Spanish. The cryptids around the fire swiveled their heads to stare directing at where the humans were. Now they had no options, they had to run.

They bolted off, as well as they could with Devon's ankle still busted. She limped behind them as the states gave chase. Greg held her hand so she wouldn't get lost. They raced through the tall grass as different states raced beside them, trying to herd them somewhere.

One decided to take a lunge at them, however. The state was a strange mix of a bear, a cat, and a dog and attempted to bite one of their heads off, but was stopped by a golden light. They looked back to see what it was. An angel seemed to have come down, except it's halo was made of bees and parts of it's body were made of honeycombs. It looked back at them and smiled. The three didn't smile back, they darted off once more.

More states followed after and clawed and pawed at them. It was strange and a little morbid, but Greg was reminded of cats. He felt less like he was being chased down by a pack of lions and instead like a light that a bunch of house cats were trying to catch. It was strange and stupid.

Suddenly another state stood before them. It was inhuman in a way the other states had not been. The other states were grounded in something from Earth, but this state seemed ethereal and completely out of this world. It was black, silver, and a radioactive green color with strange fins sticking out of random places. The ground around it withered and died.

A sudden, strange energy shot out from it and the humans were sent sprawling in different directions. Fire spread on the grass, except this fire was sickly, sour green and smelled both sickeningly sweet and horrifyingly noxious. Greg coughed as he searched for Luke and Devon.

He spotted Devon through the flames first. He started crawling over to her but stopped in his tracks as he realized something was coming towards her. A large mass of rock, lead, and beryl was slowly approaching Devon, who was stock still as she watched it grow nearer and nearer. Just as it lunged toward her and Greg was ready to dart over to grab her he was pulled up by his neck by another state.

Greg clawed at the state's hand and turned around to see who it was. It was that same otherworldly, radioactive looking state. Its hand squeezed down on Greg's throat and he could feel his throat burning. He thought he was going to die, when suddenly the state's eyes flashed.

Their eyes were at first that radioactive green color, but suddenly the left one appeared blue and the right red. It dropped him like it was burnt and grabbed its head, shrieking in pain. Greg didn't take any time to dust himself, rushing to find Devon, but seeing she was gone from where cryptid had taken her. No one in sight.

He turned the other direction and felt tears fall down his face in relief. Luke was stumbling through the green fire looking around haphazardly. Greg shot through the flames, chasing Luke down, when he suddenly noticed something behind Luke that had Greg screaming.

That shadowy figure they had seen stalking after them was now looming over Luke. Now Greg could see the gleaming glasses and beanie atop its head. Greg reached out his hand and Luke went to take it, but regular orange fire blazed in front of Greg and had him dropping to the ground to avoid being burnt.

He coughed and looked through the flames, but Luke and California were gone as well.

"LU-" Greg didn't have the chance to finish his thought, as a cryptid had pounced onto him. A cryptid with a familiar, awful stench.

New Jersey growled above him, those goat eyes gleaming with murderous intent. Once again there was a hand crushing his windpipe, and Jersey raised his clawed hand up to strike him down.

As Greg's vision was fading from the lack of oxygen, he could feel some sort of presence above him and New Jersey, but he did not witness it fight off Jersey, as he passed out before he could.


When Greg first woke up, he thought it had all been a dream and he was back at home.

The logical part of Greg told him this wasn't his home. His bedroom had the same gray walls as when he first got it, not the cool navy blue walls he was staring at. He also did not have nearly as Buffalo Bill merch as whoever lived here.

He sat up and it all came flooding back to him. Devon. Luke. Nacht der Volksgeister.

He tried to escape the bed as fast he could, but found himself tangled in the blankets and crashing and burning immediately.

"Ow..." he fought against the blankets and managed to extricate himself from them, when he noticed a figure standing in the corner of the room.

A marble, Roman statue dressed in colonial clothes watched him. It wore a crown that resembled lightning suspended in animation, decorated with garnets of all shapes and sizes.

"...New York?"

The statue nodded stiffly. The Buffalo Bills merch had made it pretty obvious. Greg nodded back at him, rubbing his throat as he did so. He had just been strangled by not one but two states. He suddenly jolted in surprise as he realized something. There was a mirror in the room that he darted over to.

What he saw in the mirror confirmed his suspicions. None of the scrapes and marks he'd received that night were there anymore. Even the bite mark from Jersey.

"How...did you do that?" He turned to look at New York. He didn't say anything, or move, he was a statue after all, Greg supposed.

"Why..." Greg stopped his next question. He was going to ask "why" New York did it, but it seemed futile to ask him questions. Besides, Greg had his suspicions. Greg was from New York after all. Born and raised in Queens. It sort of made sense that New York would help him.

He shook his head. Wait, then by that logic it meant that when California took Luke that he hadn't planned to hurt him, but to heal him.

"Oh my god. Yes! Yes! Okay, thanks for the help New York, but I gotta bounce-" When Greg moved to the door New York blocked it. He didn't see New York move, he really hoped this wasn't some Weeping Angels business.

"New York...Thanks for the help, but now I really gotta go. I gotta make sure my friends are okay."

New York stayed in his spot.

 "...Fine. Could you at least let me use the bathroom alone? I haven't gone since we got here, y'know."

Though New York's face remained still, he could tell he was cringing. Eventually New York seemed to come to a decision, another stiff nod happening.

Greg went to the bathroom, hoping to get out through Connecticut's door to the bathroom, but New York was blocking it, with his body turned away from Greg to give him privacy. At least he was courteous statue.

Greg hadn't been lying, he did his business and flushed the toilet. He then used the sound of the flush to sneak out of the bathroom, race through New York's bedroom, and rush out the door.

Thank god, the Statehouse looked back to normal. Or maybe it was only this part. The northeast's hall was the same as ever and Greg was so grateful. He dashed towards the elevator and pressed 5. California's floor.

The elevator started to rise, then suddenly fall - no - crash down. The metal screamed as it fell and Greg gripped the handle as tightly as he could, trying desperately to keep his footing. The lights flashed above him.

Then as suddenly as it fell it stopped, and with a ding announced he was at his floor. The doors opened revealing -

The Statehouse was back to looking wonky. All the bedrooms in the house were now down one single, dark hallway. Joy. At least California's room was close by. Greg tiptoed over to it and tried the door knob. Unlocked, thank goodness. He peaked it open and took a small glance inside.

California was standing in one corner, watching Luke, while Luke sat on a bean bag looking awfully chill about his situation. Greg tried as subtly as possible to indicate for Luke to get out quietly. Luckily for Greg Luke saw him. Unluckily for Greg, Luke did not understand him.

"Greg! You're oka-" California dashed in between them in a millisecond and swiped at Greg's eyes with his claws. Greg managed to dodge it in time. Luke shot up and marched over to California.

"Why would do that Cal, that's my-" California, hissed, honest to God hissed, and made another grab for Greg who dodged it once more. Man it was good to be back in top shape. Luke raced out of the room to stand in front of Greg.

"STOP! I won't let you-" for the third time in one minute Luke didn't get the chance to finish his sentence as a blast sounded from a room further down the hall. Luke and Greg's heads swiveled to look at it. In the middle of the dust stood Devon, fully healed and pissed.

"LOOK IT WAS NICE OF YOU TO HEAL ME, BUT I'M DONE NOW YOU-Luke? GREG?!"

Well that explained who took Devon, though it did not explained how she blasted down the door. Before they could have a tearful reunion cryptids started crawling out of the rooms and walls. Tentacles dripped down from the ceiling. The energy became very, very dangerous.

Greg took Luke's hand in his and the two ran down the hall, meeting up with Devon and speeding up when they were together.

The cryptids raced alongside them. They were no longer playing, they were deadly serious. Talons lunged at them, states rammed into them and nearly sent them flying or tripping. Growls bombarded their ears. Everything was so loud and they'd just been healed but they were being attacked again.

Hands were trying to grab them. Mouths were biting at them. Tentacles flurried overhead. Greg could barely see California and New York's silhouettes every now and again, stark still as they'd been earlier.

The hallway shifted and contorted around, over, and under them. Their feet could hardly catch any grip. Everything shook around them, trying to knock them off them into the waiting maws of the cryptids that pursued them. Everything was so dark and it was only Devon and Luke's hands in his that kept him grounded and reassured him. They were there. They could make it.

The lights flashed heavily, but through it he noticed a figure standing at the end of the hallway. A large figured, draped in a large cloak of furs and blankets. He forced his legs to fight through the imbalance of the hallway and race towards Alaska, dragging Luke and Devon along with him.

There was barely any time as they all stopped just in front of Alaska. The short burst of adrenaline got them to Alaska, now they only had half a minute to find safety.

He let go of Devon and Luke's hands as they panted, and shucked off his hoodie, holding it out in front of Alaska.

"PLEASE! HELP US!"

Alaska regarded him impassively, and just as Greg thought Alaska might give in and attack them, Alaska opened up his cloak.

Relief did not last long though, as the trio took in the massive void under his cloak. But they had no chance to refuse, as the cloak wrapped around them, sending them straight into the abyss.


Greg woke up for the third time that day to sunshine coming through the living room window and birds singing. Luke and Devon lay on either side of him.

"Ope! You're awake!" Greg eyes looked sharply to see...regular Minnesota in his regular clothes holding...a hot dish?

"You guys sure took a great fall! You carry too much equipment, don'tcha know?" He set the hot dish down in front of them. "I made you guys a hot dish. I hope you like it." Greg raised an eyebrow at how strained Minnesota's smile seemed.

"...Okay," he said as he felt Luke and Devon stirring next to him.

South Carolina appeared next with barbecue, at this hour?

"Gee, y'all really shouldn't come so late. Y'all passed out before y'all could film. I made y'all some brisket so y'all could feel better...Y'all." North Carolina came up behind him carrying more barbecue and swatted South on the shoulder. South for once didn't argue with North about who had the better barbecue and just cleared his throat.

"Oh you're so pretty South. You remember, they fell cause they're equipment was too heavy and they got knocked out. Right?"

South coughed, "Yeah. Right."

Colorado's voice sounded from the kitchen, "You guys think I should give them some weed so they forget?"

"NO!" Several voices shouted.

Greg watched all this and shrugged. Luke and Devon gave him bewildered looks, but he just took some of both South and North Carolina's barbecue and dug in.

By the time they left, an hour and a half later, they'd been fed and given more food than a ten person Thanksgiving. It seemed pretty clear to Greg that this was meant to be a bribery of some sorts. Or maybe it was meant as a subtle kill tactic where they give all three of them heart attacks so they never mention what they saw. Whatever. If they wanted to pretend it never happened, then they could pretend it never happened.

A week later, Greg was called in for a meeting with Gov.

They were in Gov's personal office. Greg sat in the seat across from his desk and waited for Gov to start.

Gov started awkwardly, "So...Perhaps it is finally time to talk about the events that transpired last week."

Greg nodded, "When you and the other states turned into cryptids and attacked me and my friends? Yeah I remember."

Gov winced and wrung his hands. It was a far cry from the Gov on Nacht der Volksgeister. "Yes. That. I have not received any word from any of my higher ups about the events that transpired. Am I correct in assuming you have done nothing with the footage I know you collected?"

"Yup," Greg popped his p loudly.

"Right..." Gov eyes shifted back and forth. "And, why didn't you do anything with it. Blackmail?"

"No. We destroyed the footage."

You destroyed the-wait you did what? Why would you-" Gov stopped short, at a loss for words.

"Because Gov," Greg took a pen out of Gov's cup and started playing with it, "Because I like the states, and I know you weren't in control. I'll admit I'm pissed you guys haven't apologized," he looked pointedly at Gov.

"But you want to avoid the issue. I get it. I convinced Devon and Luke not to reveal it. Luke was easy to convince. He's sad though we can't start a cryptid hunting show with it though. Devon was harder to convince, but I think however Missouri helped her that night convinced her you guys were pretty alright. So we told the producers the footage was corrupted and had to be deleted." He set the pen down again.

Gov was silent. For a long time he just stared at the pen Greg had been playing with. Then he smiled and looked at Greg.

"Greg, thank you. And I apologize on behalf of the Statehouse the trouble you kids went through. I'll get them to give you a formal apology as soon as possible."

Greg smiled back at Gov, and that was that.

Notes:

Get ready for a MASSIVE list of notes. I'm so sorry please do not let it discourage you from commenting.

- I'm pretty sure I didn't say it in the fic but Devon is black. I imagined her hair in braids the entire fic.

- The yellow entrance hallway is a reference to icestarphoenix's backrooms AU, although i feel the need to clarify THEY DIDN'T ACTUALLY GO TO THE BACKROOMS

- "Never run from anything immortal, it attracts their attention," is a quote from The Last Unicorn, my favorite book of all time. Greg's mom is cultured.

- I think it's pretty obvious who's talking to Gregory in the dark room. Fun fact I tossed around the idea of Kyle making a cameo here. Decided not to.

- The mass of tentacles is very clearly one state. I'll give you one guess.

- The look of the Statehouse in this fic is inspired by my dreams. Particularly the wonky angles and perspectives in them. And the way that buildings just don't work like they do in real life.

- Hawai'i is my favorite cryptid design in this fic.

- Roughly what Hawai'i says translates to "The Night the Island Walks" or at least that's what it should be. I did my research but I'm still not sure I got it right. Please correct my Hawaiian if so.

- Texas's chase scene soundtrack is "The Red Bull Attacks" from The Last Unicorn the movie.

- Greg's thought process as Texas chases them down, "Is this it? Is this what I'm into? Am I a monster fucker?"

- Any guesses why Arkansas copies what the humans say?

- Kansas is my second favorite design in this fic. Also, considering what we learn about states liking humans from their states, Kansas's reason for only attacking Devon is more obvious.

- The soundtrack for the chase scene through the maze is "Adelaide's Trap" from Over the Garden Wall

- Greg gets reminded of a lot of things throughout the fic, which is just a writing quirk of mine.

- The state that took a shot at the humans was Connecticut, and the state that protected them was Utah.

- Can anyone tell me why Nevada stopped attacking?

- New York's design is based off his name as "The Empire State" and also the fact that New York was the jewel of England's crown back when they were still English.

- Don't ask me how Devon got out. She just did that on her own.

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