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Shen Qingqiu writhed, fighting against the hand clamped over his mouth, the blood pouring past his lips. That was fine. If it had come to this point… then it was fine. Luo Binghe pressed harder, urging his blood to continue flowing.
“Don’t worry Shizun. It’ll be over in a moment.” It hurt a little. He had wanted to reconnect with Shen Qingqiu on the man’s own terms. But then he had looked away, he had run away. It was fine. Luo Binghe had planned for this, had honed the ability of his blood for exactly this situation.
Shen Qingqiu didn’t have any choice but to swallow. Luo Binghe withdrew his hand, watching impassively as his Shizun coughed and wiped at his mouth. It was too late to try and get rid of it now.
The mites weren’t large in number yet, so he would need to focus a bit and it might take a moment to reach every part of his sweet Shizun’s system. Soon though.
At his call, they responded and Shen Qingqiu gasped, clawing at his own throat, his own stomach. It was too late. The blood was already inside him and regardless of how dirty or disgusting he thought it was… it wouldn’t matter soon. Except, it wasn’t disgust or contempt he found…
Luo Binghe blinked, letting the feedback of the mites run through his mind again. Fear? His Shizun wasn’t disgusted with him? He feared Luo Binghe? No… he was terrified of Luo Binghe.
“Oh, Shizun.” That was okay. That was perfectly okay. Luo Binghe could fix that. It took only moments to command his mites, to send them out to erase that fear, that terror, anxiety as well. As a permanent solution it wasn’t the greatest. He had found that erasing fear in someone made them a bit reckless. He would protect Shizun of course, and the man could protect himself, but he’d rather not have him injured at all.
Shen Qingqiu had slowly stopped clawing at himself, his gaze openly lapsing into confusion. A usual first response.
He didn’t flinch back as Luo Binghe reached out. There was a spark of emotion at the soft contact, the brush along his cheek, but it wasn’t anything negative. Good. Maybe he wouldn’t have to control Shen Qingqiu for long at all. “Shizun.” The man’s gaze tracked to him, frowning slightly.
“What… What did Luo Binghe do?”
Could he take away embarrassment too? He hadn’t practiced that one. Generally speaking it wasn’t an emotion that came up in his experiments. Cupping both of the man’s cheeks, he moved closer. “This Binghe took away Shizun’s fear.”
There was a beat of wide eyed silence, and then the first trickles of outrage. Luo Binghe shut that off too. “Luo Binghe is controlling this master.” He left the traces of awe alone, his mites whispering that the man should also be filled with calm.
He let the sadness that he had to do this rise up. “It’s not full control of Shizun, and it’s only so Shizun will talk to this Binghe.”
“Does Binghe’s blood also act as a truth serum?” He wasn’t entirely thrilled to think that the interest he was catching traces of was academic but… his Shizun was a scholar.
He shook his head slightly. “No, Shizun. But this Binghe will be able to tell if you’re lying, and people tend to be more honest when unafraid of the consequences.”
“Huh, that was never mentioned.” His sweet Shizun tilted his head, his eyes falling to where Luo Binghe was lightly tracing his cheekbones. “Doesn’t Binghe want this master to be afraid of him?” His head tilted, eyes narrowing slightly. “Is Binghe forcing this master to be this contained?”
Carefully, and ready to shut down any unwanted emotions right as they formed, Binghe gathered this inquisitive man into his arms. He was definitely going to have to return at least a little fear. If not he was worried his Shizun would walk right up to far too dangerous things in the name of curiosity. “This Binghe doesn’t want Shizun to be afraid of him, or disgusted with him, or mad. What he wants is why and for Shizun to allow him to come back.”
Luo Binghe jolted slightly at the feeling of hands on his belt. Not untying it, but rather tracing over his stomach, plucking at the fabric. Yes, Shizun. There was the interest he wanted. Plenty of confusion too but he left that. It tended not to go well to shut down confusion.
“Did Binghe shut off his own anger?”
If only. “This Binghe can’t control his own emotions, only others.”
Binghe wasn’t quite ready for the exhaustion, didn’t even realize it could quite be an emotion. Shizun was spreading his hands more firmly across his chest though, trailing inside the outermost robe and down his sides. Binghe hummed his appreciation.
“Then why isn’t Binghe angry? Why does he want this master to touch him?”
“This disciple’s desires have always been simple. He wants to be by Shizun’s side, to be the one Shizun relies on for all things.”
Shen Qingqiu snorted. “Simple? Binghe will be lord of demons and men. He will have a harem of hundreds of women.”
Luo Binghe frowned, withdrawing from the loose embrace enough to consider Shen Qingqiu’s face. “This Binghe desires only Shizun.”
For a long moment Shen Qingqiu stared at him, then he was lightly touching him again. Tracing his arms, running hands down his chest. “Binghe should stop controlling this master’s desire. This master is going to be very angry about it when he can be.”
He shook his head slightly. “This Binghe isn’t. He is… trying very hard not to react to it. Though he would like Shizun to be so open in the future.”
The touch dissipated for a moment, then resumed. “Liar.”
“Perhaps Shizun was simply afraid to act on his desires before.” Luo Binghe leaned in, reveling in how the hands pressed harder, curling around to press into his back. “Perhaps he was afraid to admit he’d desire a demon.”
Shen Qingqiu shook his head. “This master doesn’t care that Binghe is a demon. He already knew that. Luo Binghe was underage, and a disciple. This master wouldn’t have considered him in such a light.”
For a moment Binghe mulled over which part of that he wanted to dive deeper into. “Shizun knew this one was half demon?” Thinking back… he had identified on sight that Luo Binghe was a Heavenly Demon despite their rarity.
His Shizun shrugged, apparently deciding that answer was enough. Binghe took a deeper breath in and out to steady himself. He couldn’t lose his calm or push too hard. The mites sometimes got a bit… aggressive if he lost control. It helped to have hands rub soothing circles on his back. Fine, there still wasn’t a hint of disgust so perhaps… it truly didn’t matter to the man even if that flew in the face of everything said at the Immortal Alliance Conference. “Shizun said that before… he wouldn’t have considered this Binghe. He is no longer of Cang Qiong Sect.” Per direct actions of the man in his arms. Binghe crushed down the anger and betrayal. “This Binghe is also no longer underage.”
“Hm. It doesn’t matter. Binghe could choose anyone, he wouldn’t choose this old man who was so cruel to him. Besides, this master is straight.”
Binghe drew back, openly showing his disbelief in that. “Shizun… this Binghe has seen the way you look at Liu Qingge.”
The man just frowned at him. “This master isn’t interested in Liu Qingge.”
“Shizun was waiting up for him late at night.”
Shen Qingqiu raised an eyebrow back. “And Binghe thought that meant we were sleeping together? Have you met that man? He’d probably choke and die at even the suggestion of it.” The other person’s feelings were a bit irrelevant to feeling desire weren’t they? Even at his lowest and most hateful, Luo Binghe had desired the very man who threw him into hell.
“Shizun was very friendly with Gongyi Xiao.”
“Sure, this master understands his situation and felt some comradery with him. He has also been very helpful to this master but friendly hardly means in love with or willing to… dual cultivate with.” Shen Qingqiu blinked, tilting his head. “Huh… can Binghe also turn off the embarrassment? This master is still feeling that.”
He shook his head slightly. “This Binghe isn’t practiced with that emotion and he doesn’t wish to accidently hurt Shizun.”
“Ah, so only on purpose.”
At his beseeching look, Shen Qingqiu drew his hand back, lightly tracing the marks already forming on his throat.
For a moment Binghe’s control wavered before he forced the outburst back down. He hung his head slightly. “This Binghe was angry and… overreacted.”
“Doesn’t fix the damage.”
“This Binghe could… if Shizun doesn’t mind.”
“I am not currently capable of minding.” Had his control slipped on the anger? No… his mites were still responding just as they should. To his Shizun was this just a statement of fact?
“Then please forgive this one.” Reaching up, the traced the marks. Shen QIngqiu winced at the feeling, and then outright shuttered at the mites moving under the skin. For the first time… disgust rolled through him.
For a brief moment Binghe felt a flare of panic. Given the suddenly much harsher grip on his shoulder though he had to force it back down, calming himself. It was just at the mites moving. Already the disgust was fading away to… consideration as the bruises disappeared. “Binghe has to maintain active control over this master.”
“Yes, Shizun.” His voice sounded more winded than he liked.
“How long can Binghe stay awake?”
His eyes widened slightly, his control slipping a bit and his own grip turning harsh. Then he breathed in and out. “Shizun, this one is a master of dreams. He can maintain control even while sleeping.”
For some reason there was a twitch of a smile. “Does Binghe have to be in the other person’s dream to maintain that control?”
His eyes narrowed slightly, thinking back to how calm and collected Shizun was during the nightmare sequence they had shared. He had told Binghe that attacking the forms there meant attacking one’s own mind, but it was an experience that could be survived. Binghe would know. With the sudden amount of confidence flowing through Shizun… did he believe he could overpower the dream? Shatter it by force? Wrest control of it from Binghe?
Binghe had no desire to see the man hurt himself trying. He would release control before the situation arose, even if it meant having to physically restrain his Shizun. Before any of that though he needed to get back on topic. “Shizun. Why did you push this one into the Endless Abyss?”
Shame, regret… grief flooded his senses so thoroughly that Binghe had physically step back. “Because this master was afraid, and chose his own life over Binghe’s precious innocence.”
Binghe’s eyes widened. “Shizun’s life?”
“Hm. If this master didn’t push Luo Binghe into the Endless Abyss he would have never unlocked his true potential, and this master would forfeit their life.” Shen Qingqiu’s head tilted, a hand coming up to his chin. “It’s a bit nice… not being afraid of what will happen if I say too much.”
Immediately Binghe released his control, his hands catching Shen Qingqiu’s shoulders. “Shizun would have died?” Within seconds Shen Qingqiu’s eyes went wide, fear and horror flooding across the mite’s feedback. The man said nothing however, just openly gaping at him until Binghe wrapped him in an embrace.
It had never crossed his mind that it wasn’t Shizun’s choice to push him in. He should have known. He should have realized that his precious, caring Shizun would never look at him that way, would never willingly hurt him. He should have recognized that cold look that starred through a person. He had seen it plenty of times when he pushed his test subjects too far and they shut down all emotions. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Please, Shizun… please forgive me.”
“Wh-what?”
“Shizun made the right choice. His life is far more important than anything this lowly disciple has.”
“Binghe!”
He didn’t quite let go at the wiggling and pushing. Instead he slid to his knees, burying his face against the other’s waistband. “This Binghe forgives Shizun. He didn’t realize… and he won’t push Shizun again.”
“What?” A hand wove through his hair, yanking back with a distracting amount of force until he could meet those startled eyes. “What the hell, Binghe?”
“This lowly one should have known. He should have known that Shizun would never willingly push him away. He begs Shizun forgiveness for not realizing, for being so mad… for endangering Shizun.”
Shen Qingqiu opened his mouth, closed it, and repeated that several times. Finally he pushed at Binghe’s shoulder. “Let go.”
Rather… reluctantly… he did so. If he kowtowed fast enough would Shizun stay? Would he run away again and reject this idiot of a disciple?
“Binghe! Damn it, get up!” There was panic in the feedback, as well as the grip on his arms, dragging him up. “In the street Binghe?” For a long moment Shen Qingqiu glared at him. “Stay standing.” Then he backed off, rubbing his hands down his face.
“Shizun… didn’t run.”
The man opened his mouth again, made some half gesture and then turned away. “Gods… how did it end up like this? Since when can Binghe control emotions!”
“This Binghe first heard of the pos-”
“Rhetorical!”
“Begging forgiveness, this lowly one will never do that to Shizun again.” He’d never endanger him, never made him face whatever consequences he apparently feared from even admitting the matter. Even if it made it a bit hard to track down who or what could have caused his Shizun such distress.
Shizun paused, glancing behind him with narrowed eyes. “Don’t you dare go digging into what this master suggested. There’s nothing there for Binghe to find.”
Was that said willingly? Was it a precaution? Binghe would just have to be subtle.
Shen Qingqiu sighed, made some other gesture that vaguely looked like he might be praying. After some time of silence, and a few more instances of Shen Qingqiu making half gestures or gripping his own arms, he drew in a deep breath and turned to Luo Binghe. By now the panic had simmered to near nothing, leaving behind the exhaustion again. Not that it showed on Shen Qingqiu’s face or in his tone. “Did Binghe mean it? That he forgives this master?”
“Yes!” How could he possibly hold something against the man when it wasn’t his choice? How could he when he had felt Shizun’s grief . His feet shifted slightly. “Though… this one wonders if it would be possible that Shizun also forgives him?”
Shen Qingqiu waved a hand at him. “There’s nothing to forgive.”
There was, but it was fine. He’d make up for it in other ways. “Then… Can this disciple come home?”
Shen QIngqiu frowned at him. “Why would Binghe want to… if he holds nothing against this master or Cang Qiong?”
He blinked. “Because Shizun is there.”
It got him a rather considering look, and an odd feeling, like there was a string being plucked somewhere in the back of his mind. After a moment his eyes widened. Shizun was poking at the mites from his end? “This disciple can dissolve them!”
Shen Qingqiu refocused, seeming almost startled. “What?”
“This one can dissolve the blood mites in Shizun.”
For a long moment Shen Qingqiu stared at him, then down at his own hands. “Binghe would really do that?”
“Yes, of course. Of course Shizun would be upset by them.”
“By being tortured or controlled by them sure.” His hands flexed. “Binghe is sure he forgives this master?”
He’d say it as many times as needed. “Yes Shizun.”
There was a bit of hesitance to Shen Qingqiu’s nod. “Then leave them.”
Binghe blinked. “Really?” He would be allowed to leave the mites? He’d… he’d be allowed to know where Shizun was always? To know what the man was feeling with just a few stray thoughts? He’d be allowed to protect him?
“Mn.” Shen Qingqiu drew in a deeper breath, seeming to force the traces of fear away. “Binghe can go back to Cang Qiong though… we might find some position other than disciple for him to take up so he can also see to his duties in the demon realm.”
Luo Binghe gaped at him, some hope whispering in his mind. Shizun wouldn’t consider a disciple as a romantic partner but… he was offering that Binghe could come back and claim a different title? He took at step forward, finally letting himself think of those hands oh so light on his stomach, fingers digging into his shoulders. Shizun stopped him with a raised hand. “This master will also need Binghe to call off… this.” His gesture was vague, seeming to encompass everything around them.
Binghe frowned slightly, looking around them. This? “This one doesn’t understand.”
“The… the plague.”
Honestly, Binghe figured it was the sheer shock that prevented his temper. As it was he just stared. “Does Shizun really think this Binghe is capable of something like that?”
His look said enough, the emotional feedback entirely confident. He shuttered, fists clenching as he fought for control over his own emotions. It would be so nice if he could control those. “Shizun, this disciple has nothing to do with causing this plague.” At the slight raised eyebrow he lost it enough to snarl. “Sowers are southern demons. Disgusting things under the command of someone else.”
That at least seemed to get through, Shen Qingqiu’s eyes widening a bit. “Someone else?”
“Yes!”
He didn’t think Shen Qingqiu fully believed him, the whispers of doubt making him want to snarl again. His Shizun took a deep breath though. “Alright… then… this master asks that you catch them all tonight.”
He immediately accepted the command. He would do exactly that. He might even drag a sower back and force it to tell Shizun all about its actual master. He rather liked that plan actually.
Luo Binghe was ecstatic that he double checked what exactly the answer was going to be before he followed through. Mostly he was correct, that it was the other two Heavenly Demons that had appeared who were gaining power in the south, but he never could have dreamed that Huan Hua Palace was involved as well. More specifically, the Old Palace Master was involved.
Given the fiasco the following day with some woman trying to claim that Shizun was not only a murderer but engaged to her, Luo Binghe was thrilled that he had decided to make the Sower confess who it’s human world support was in front of everyone. Certainly it got a lot more attention from the cultivators than the baseless accusations against his Shizun. Well… maybe not entirely baseless. There had been a brief spike of fear at the mere call of ‘Shen Jiu’ and he had definitely been uneasy the entire time. It was fine though, because that unease had lightened the moment Binghe stepped closer, standing at his Shizun’s shoulder. He didn’t care what the woman said. Hell, it could be true that Shen Qingqiu wiped out a household and Binghe wouldn’t care. At most, he might have preferred if Shizun would have silenced that woman as well. If others cared… they’d have to go through him first.
After, Shizun had all but collapsed into one of the seats at the inn. Binghe had immediately brought tea and settled as close as Shizun would be comfortable with. It was close enough to rub his back soothingly.
Eventually, Shen Qingqiu sighed. “Does Binghe wonder… if it’s true?”
He immediately shook his head. “This Binghe doesn’t care.”
He got a quiet huff in response. “Alright then. Thank you, for standing beside this master.”
“This Binghe desires no other place but to be by Shizun’s side.”
“So cheesy.” He breathed out a sigh, shifting to just look at Binghe. “Did Binghe really mean he did nothing to control this master’s desire?”
Quickly, Binghe shook his head. “No, Shizun. Fear, horror, and anger. Only those emotions or those directly related to them.” He blinked. “Oh… and encouraging Shizun to feel calm.”
Shen Qingqiu nodded slightly, letting his eyes close. “And he hasn’t controlled this master's emotions since.”
It wasn’t quite a question. “No, Shizun.”
There was a curl of embarrassment, quickly intertwined with determination. “You should probably stop calling this one ‘shizun’.”
Binghe leaned in slightly, debating for a moment on hiding his reaction. It was a debate quickly lost, his hope on why showing through. Shen Qingqiu’s lip twitched and then he gave one of the soft smiles. “Ah, it really is too bad Binghe can’t turn off shame.”
“Qingqiu can be as shameless as he wants with this Binghe.”
“That isn’t quite how it works. This master would really be allowed… that is…Binghe desires…” Shen Qingqiu’s gaze dropped slightly, and Binghe surged forward. Shen Qingqiu squeaked under him, panic singing up through him as Binghe pressed their lips together. Immediately Binghe gentled his touch, doing his absolute best to be soft and Shen Qingqiu relaxed under him. He even returned the kiss, hands lightly circling Binghe’s shoulders. After what was definitely too short a time, he drew back. “Huh… maybe it was this master’s own desire.”
“Does Shizun want to check again… just to be sure?”
He got a quiet huff of laughter, and those lips on his again for an agonizingly short second. “Hm, no. This master has decided on the answer. If Binghe feels the same perhaps…”
Binghe decided he did kind of like the squeak of surprise and the following scramble to secure arms around his neck and shoulders. It wasn’t dignified in any way, and no doubt Shen Qingqiu would be beside himself if Binghe mentioned it so he wasn’t about to comment. Instead he just plucked the man from the seat, walked the few steps while laughing slightly at the scolding, and deposited the peak lord on his bed. Binghe followed before that desire could be drowned out by anything else.