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Anakin whimpered pitifully and rolled over onto his side.
It was too bright in here. For as long as he’d been captured, he’d been kept in a kind of cage with lines of bright fluorescent lights in the ceiling that were never switched off. They made his head ache, his body feel constantly dehydrated and his mind cringe because he felt like he was under constant surveillance. Which, he mused dully, he probably was.
As another contraction tore through him, Anakin bit down hard on his bottom lip to prevent himself from crying out and tried to ignore the bone-deep urge to go somewhere dark and quiet to have his children in peace. He folded his arms over his face hoping that would make a difference, but he could still sense the brightness all around him and it made him feel like he might be losing a grip on his sanity.
Anakin wasn’t exactly sure how long he’d been here. The only thing he had to help him mark the passing of time was his pregnancy. He hadn’t known he was pregnant when he’d been ambushed, drugged, and taken here and now he was about to give birth so he figured that just less than nine months had gone by.
At least that’s what he told himself. That he must have been so newly pregnant that he didn’t know it until he got here. Because the alternative, that it had happened at some stage while those vile creatures came into his cage and –
No. He wasn’t going to think about it. He’d been here nine months. And these were Obi Wan’s children.
He’d been so surprised when he’d realized he was pregnant, and even more so when he’d discovered that he was carrying two. Then with what his captors put him through on a daily basis, every morning when he woke up and checked in with the two little lights growing inside of him, it felt like a miracle. He’d had no faith in this pregnancy, no faith in his body to be able to see it through, but they’d made it all the way to the delivery.
He wondered what was going to happen next.
Even if they were Obi Wan’s – they are, they are, they are, Anakin repeated insistently in his head – the situation was far from ideal. Jedi weren’t supposed to form attachments and he knew the Council would consider Anakin’s children to be the biggest attachment there was. And they’d be right. Up until he found out he was pregnant, Anakin had been intending on starving to death in this cage. He didn’t exactly want to die but given what was happening on a daily basis, anything seemed better than a lifetime of this.
But then he’d felt his two little lights shining inside him and all of those plans had evaporated. He couldn’t do that to them, leave them to starve to death inside him. And so here he was.
Numbly, he wondered what Obi Wan would think about this, if Obi Wan still thought of him at all. It had been months, at the very least, and there was no indication that he’d tried to find him. There were lots of reasons for that, Anakin knew, but sometimes it was easier to tell himself that this was his life now, because hope was more painful than anything else.
He pushed his sweaty curls out of his eyes, unable to completely stifle his moan as a contraction, so much stronger than any of the ones that came before it, hit. He curled around himself, rubbing his hands over his belly in a fruitless attempt to soothe some of the pain.
There seemed to be some kind of crash somewhere in the distance. Anakin glanced in the direction of it, wondering again at why he had been allowed to go through this alone. Surely his captors would have enjoyed watching him, humiliating him when he was in such a state of vulnerability.
Obi Wan wasn’t Anakin’s mate. They’d never had a conversation about it but that was because they didn’t need to; it was just an unspoken understanding between them. Anakin was sure that Obi Wan saw what they had as some kind of tension-releasing activity with someone he trusted with his life.
It had started a few months before Anakin had been captured. They’d just endured a brutal battle and had lost half of their clones in the process. Anakin had walked into Obi Wan’s quarters to find the other man crouched down on the floor, one hand pressed against his mouth as he sobbed these horrible, gut-wrenching cries.
Anakin had knelt down and wordlessly wrapped his arms around him from behind, his chest pressed up against his back. They stayed that way for minutes, hours, days, Anakin lost track until Obi Wan turned to look at him, their eyes met, and then before Anakin had truly processed what was happening, Obi Wan was kissing him as if he hoped to drown in it.
The first time – and every time after it – had been quick, desperate and needy. Obi Wan was always in such a rush to get inside him, and Anakin was always in such a rush to have him inside, that he was never quite slick enough for there not to be a tight burn as Obi Wan breached his entrance. Anakin relished it. He loved the feeling, loved that he got to keep feeling it every time he moved even after it was over, and loved that, for once, he saw his poised and dignified Master utterly lose control.
Anakin glanced over his shoulder, surprised that an audience hadn’t formed to watch him endure the birth of his children. His captors and their many guests had been fascinated by Anakin’s pregnancy.
Pregnancy had been hard. He’d been so sick for what felt like forever which was especially terrifying as he was given so little food and water that he really couldn’t afford to be losing it into the fresher every time he tried to eat. He remembered heaving pitifully, his throat constantly burning, or collapsing on the tiles, so frightened that this would be the day he lost his children.
He’d tried to hide his condition for as long as he could and in hindsight that had been a mistake. While he loathed people coming into his cell and caressing his growing belly and whispering what they were going to do once the babies were out of him, it had resulted in him receiving more food which his body had desperately needed.
For whatever reason, his captor didn’t want him to miscarry. Somehow, Anakin didn’t feel that was solely out of concern for his emotional wellbeing.
And that was why, as bad as it had been, Anakin knew he was going to miss being pregnant. Feeling his children moving inside him had been one of the few things that had given him purpose, had almost brought him joy, since he’d arrived here. Also, while they were inside him, Anakin knew they were safe and they couldn’t be separated. He hated to think what was going to happen once his children were born. He wasn’t sure if he could survive without them with him. He wasn’t sure that he even wanted to.
As if sensing his dark thoughts, one of the twins kicked rigorously, lower than he’d been feeling them previously. Anakin cradled his hand around his belly, rubbing where he felt the movement. If he hadn’t just known that his children would be Force-sensitive, moments like these provided it to him. They weren’t even born but they could sense his emotions. The thought gave him a great amount of comfort, that maybe even if they were physically separated, something about them would always be with him. Up until this particular capture, Anakin had been able to sense Obi Wan anywhere in the galaxy. Surely his bond with his children would be the same.
I’m okay, Anakin pushed into the Force and the lights inside him seemed to twinkle. It was comforting to get that response. Anakin had tried reaching out to Obi Wan through their bond countless times, but his cries always went answered. Anakin could only assume that Obi Wan couldn’t hear him; there was no way he’d ignore him otherwise, no way he wouldn’t have moved the whole galaxy to find him if he knew where to look.
The pain hit again and this time it was different. Anakin pulled himself up onto his knees, leaned back on his legs and screamed as if this could somehow put an end to the feeling that someone was twisting a serrated knife through his intestines. On top of that came the most intense, horrible pressure he’d ever felt in his life, bearing down between his legs. It burned in its intensity and Anakin squeezed his eyes closed in a futile attempt to ease it as tears spilled down his cheeks and splattered onto the floor.
This was so wrong. Anakin didn’t want to have his babies here. Not in this filthy, over lit cell with no one around to look after them. He wanted a better life for them and he wanted his Master here to help him get through this. He was scared that he wasn’t going to be able to do it without him, wouldn’t be able to safely deliver their twins.
‘Make it stop,’ he moaned, even though there was no one around to hear him. He opened his eyes and looked down at the blood and fluid gushing from between his legs and splattering onto the floor. He was trembling so hard that he could barely hold himself up. ‘I can’t, I can’t do it, it’s too much…’
And then, as if it knew Anakin was close to giving up and just letting the exhaustion carry him away, the Force seemed to wrap around him like a blanket. He felt something shift inside him and then after a few more pushes, he was holding his daughter in his arms.
She had the same colour hair as his mother. That was Anakin’s first thought as he gasped for breath, gazing into her eyes. She wasn’t crying, just looking at him calmly as if they’d known each other forever. In a way, from her perspective, he guessed they had.
He wasn’t sure how long they gazed at each other, her sending out feelings of love and familiarity into the Force before the pain built up again. Anakin carefully set her down beside him, wishing he had something more to wrap her in than the thin blankets that had come with his cell, and braced himself on his hands and knees. It only took a few pushes for his son to be born.
Anakin wanted to hold him too, wanted to take in his features that seemed so similar to his own, or maybe Obi Wan, they both had blue eyes and sandy-coloured hair but it was all he could do to set the boy down next to his sister before he collapsed onto the floor.
*
He opened his eyes to find himself still lying on the floor. Everything hurt in a dull, rhythmic ache that seemed to be centred on his lower belly. In a panic, he turned his head slightly and his two children came into view, both watching him patiently, as if they’d been waiting for him to wake up.
Anakin let out a shuddery gasp as love like he’d never known washed through him.
‘Hi,’ he murmured, lifting his hand – it felt like it was weighted down but he clumsily managed – to stroke his son’s cheek. ‘Oh hi, sweetheart.’
Gasping in pain, he propped himself up on his elbow so he could reach his daughter. ‘Hey,’ he said.
They both looked at him as if they already knew who he was and Anakin felt tears spill down his cheeks.
‘You’re both so calm,’ Anakin said quietly. ‘You get that from your dad. He’d really want to meet you, you know? He’d love you so much.’
He very much wanted to hold them but he wasn’t sure that he had the strength. The absence of any interference also worried him, as surely his captors would know by now that he’d given birth. It was a miracle that his children hadn’t been taken from him, although Anakin thought dully, maybe this was part of their plan. Undoubtedly it would be more painful now that he’d met his twins if they were taken away than if he’d never met them at all.
It was only then that Anakin became aware of the weird smell of iron and the stickiness on his lower body. He glanced down at himself and felt a fresh wave of dizziness at the sight of his thighs caked with blood.
With a jolt, he became aware of footsteps heading towards him. He’d used all his blankets to wrap his children but he adjusted his tunic as best he could to give himself some pretense of modesty.
The door to his cell opened minutely and a small amount of food and water was pushed through. Anakin glared at the two people on the other side of the wall, careful to keep his face expressionless as their gazes roved over his body and landed on his children.
‘So, the pups are finally out of the oven then?’ one of the guards commented unkindly. Anakin had to fight down the impulse to curl up around his children and hiss at the guards. ‘That’ll be interesting.’
He was so relieved when they merely chuckled and left that he didn’t realise what he’d forgotten until it was almost too late.
‘Wait,’ he called after them. ‘You haven’t given me anything for my…’
The word babies died in his throat as he heard a metallic door swing shut somewhere in the distance. He and the twins were alone again.
Kriff.
Even with his stomach roiling, Anakin forced himself to take a few deep sips of water and as many bites as he could of the thick porridge-luck substance in the bowl. He had to try and get some of his strength back if he had any hope of caring for his children.
His heart ached as the twins started fussing, pushing feelings of hungry into the Force with an increasing sense of urgency. Their distress was intertwining with Anakin’s own, making his mind feel panicked and overwhelmed.
‘I know,’ he cooed. ‘I know, I’m sorry. It’s just that I don’t have anything for you.’
Without any sort of coordination at all, his son reached up one chubby hand and curled his fingers around the opening of Anakin’s tunic. Anakin looked down at himself and felt a little dizzy.
He didn’t really know anything about breastfeeding – why would he? He’d been an unpresented child when he’d left Tatooine and the Jedi had made it clear that he would never be having any children. He felt so weak and sick too, he wasn’t even sure if he was going to have much to give.
The twins started to cry in earnest now and to his surprise, Anakin felt a pull in his chest. It was so unlike anything he’d ever felt before that it gave him the confidence to try.
‘Okay, sweetheart,’ he said, opening up his tunic and lifting his son to his chest. ‘I don’t know what I’m doing, but I promise I’ll do my best.’
It wasn’t easy. His son didn’t seem to be opening his mouth enough and getting the angle right was challenging. The longer it took, the more distressed they both became and Anakin was brushing his own tears away when his son finally brushed his lips against his nipple and latched on.
Anakin let out a broken gasp as he began to suckle. Oh, it was such a relief. For the first time, Anakin felt that maybe they were all going to be okay. As long as they kept giving him enough to sustain himself, he supposed he’d be able to sustain his children too.
His daughter took to feeding a lot faster than her brother and soon they were both cooing contentedly, sending feelings of love through the Force. Anakin brushed their cheeks with his fingers, not wanting to name them by himself. It felt like something he and Obi Wan should do together. Naming them alone felt like he would be admitting he wasn’t going to see him again and he couldn’t face that version of reality.
He lay down beside his babies and curled his body around them. Surely if someone were to disturb them, they wouldn’t be able to take them without him knowing.
It turned out that this was correct. Anakin awoke to a sickening crash followed by the crackling sounds of…
Was that lightsabers?
Hardly daring to hope, he sat up, swaying dizzily as he watched the swirling blue and purple lights fill the corridor.
Purple, so that meant –
Everything seemed to be coming in snatches. Anakin had the vaguest sense that he was losing time as the world seemed to flicker and fade around him. The next thing he knew, Master Windu was kneeling at his side. He could tell by the expression on his face that he’d taken in the blood and the babies and the general grime that Anakin could feel all over his body and had to swallow hard against the feeling that he was going to throw up.
‘Skywalker,’ he said. ‘What in the galaxy is going on here?’
Anakin tried to speak but he couldn’t find his voice. He felt an entirely new type of fear. He’d been found. He was safe. But no one knew about what had happened here. No one knew he’d been pregnant. No one knew…oh Force, how was he going to explain this, explain his children…
Master Windu had his hand on his shoulder and Anakin could see his lips moving but he couldn’t hear anything over the roar in his ears. It was too much, it was all too much.
‘Master Windu,’ he said, barely aware of what he was saying, if he was making any sense at all. ‘I don’t feel well…’
He couldn't see, he couldn't think. He felt like reality was slipping from his grasp. And then his head lolled back and everything went black.
*
We’ve found Anakin.
For a moment, the world faded out of focus and all Obi Wan could hear was the sound of his own heartbeat pounding in his ears. He had never been so aware of the precise way it contracted and released and either that, or the news, made him feel slightly ill.
He wondered if he even believed the words because he’d been dreaming – or hallucinating, who can tell these days? – someone saying that exact phrase to him for almost nine months now, ever since Anakin had been taken.
Is he all right? Obi Wan replied to the comm.
There was a brief pause. No more than a few seconds, but it was all Obi Wan could think about.
Yes, came the response. Everything’s fine.
Except there had been a pause. Master Windu had had to think about it. Which led Obi Wan to believe that everything was not fine at all. He didn’t realise he’d collapsed until he felt his knees hit the floor and he sobbed into his hands, relief pouring down his face. And if his sobs sounded a little like Anakin oh Anakin oh Anakin then he’d turned off his Comm and no one was around to hear him.
Obi Wan hadn’t been okay since Anakin had been taken from him – them, he self-corrected quickly. Taken from them. Saying he’d been taken from him and led to some raised eyebrows from some members of the Jedi Council and even though he knew that perhaps he should, Obi Wan couldn’t bring himself to admit just what Anakin had become to him.
He now understood why the Jedi forbid attachment. Because attachment had been what had driven Obi Wan to near insanity. Because although he’d never admitted, had never really had a chance to tell him, Obi Wan Kenobi loved Anakin Skywalker.
He’d told himself that it was just stress relief, just another way of releasing his emotions when meditation proved too difficult, but all along he should have felt guilty because he was in love with Anakin, had been ever since Anakin had turned nineteen and this was what was driving his need to be close to him.
So that first time, when Anakin had pressed himself up against him, Obi Wan hadn’t been able to stop himself. It had been building for so long. Building every time Obi Wan admired the way Anakin’s eyelashes brushed against the hollows under his eyes when he blinked or the way his eyes shone and his cheeks glowed when something made him smile – really smile – like he was all lit up from within.
And then they’d been the way he’d smelled, the noises he’d made as Obi Wan worshipped his body, sliding his hands down his trim waist, along the curves of his hips and grabbing hungrily and his muscular yet somehow still so soft thighs.
He knew they were doing the wrong thing, but somehow he couldn’t bring himself to believe it. Not when the bond in his mind was glowing gold with love and contentment and everything just felt so right.
But then Anakin had been taken from him and it had been like losing a part of his soul.
Obi Wan turned his Comm back on. Where are you keeping him?
This time there was a long pause on the other end of the line. ‘He’s in the Halls of Healing,’ came the reluctant reply. ‘But, I’m not sure if –’
Obi Wan was already running before he could hear the end of the sentence. The Halls of Healing. He was so close. After months of being separated by a galaxy, he and Anakin were finally on the same planet, within short five-minute walk from each other. Obi Wan was actually going to get to see him, talk to him, sense him again.
Now, it was just a matter of finding out just how not fine he was.
*
‘General Kenobi,’ Healer Che said in surprise. ‘I didn’t expect to see you do soon. Is everything all right with your –’
‘Everything is fine,’ Obi Wan said, even though he was fairly certain that it wasn’t. ‘I’m here to see…’
He struggled to say Anakin’s name. He always had since – Well. Since.
‘General Kenobi, I’m not sure if that’s wise. Anakin –’
‘He was my padawan and I wish to see him,’ Obi Wan said. ‘Today. Now, in fact.’
‘Obi Wan, I understand your concern, really I do. But there is much to discuss in relation to Anakin and I’m not sure it’s a good idea to go bursting in there before we have fully understood the situation.
‘What situation?’ Obi Wan said, more loudly than he intended. ‘What could possibly…Are you saying that he’s injured?’
The healer looked at him with wide eyes that were a little too pitying for Obi Wan’s liking.
‘No,’ she said, carefully. ‘Anakin is not injured.’
‘Then what is there to understand? He’s been captured and now he’s back. Surely seeing some familiar faces will be soothing for him.’
‘He’s lost a lot of blood,’ Healer Che said gently, ‘but other than that, he appears to be recovering well. ‘I’ve got him on some fluid, vitamins and antibiotics just to ward off any infection before it starts. Obi Wan before you see him –’
‘Whatever it is,’ Obi Wan said. ‘I’ll see for myself.’
He pushed past Healer Che and followed the bond in his mind until he found Anakin’s room. He took a deep breath, promising himself that whatever he saw, whatever condition Anakin was in, that he would remain calm and steady for Anakin’s sake, and opened the door.
The first thing he noticed was that Anakin’s scent was…off. It was milkier than he remembered and a little sweeter. The second thing that was that Anakin really did look fine. A little thinner than he’d been the last time Obi Wan had seen him and with deep circles beneath his eyes, but overall fine. Relief bloomed through Obi Wan's chest like the flowers in spring.
Then Anakin glanced at him, something unreadable in his expression, before he abruptly buried his face in his hands.
‘Oh, Anakin.’
The words just slipped out.
Obi Wan was so overtaken by the sight of Anakin here, alive, whole and mostly well, that it took him a moment to realise that there were two babies in the cribs beside his bed. That was odd. Perhaps some Force-sensitive children had been found with Anakin and bonded with him on the journey back to Coruscant? Maybe this was what Healer Che thought Obi Wan needed to be briefed about. No doubt Anakin had become attached to the little ones but Obi Wan had seen Anakin grow a little too attached to a lot of people and there would be time to work all of that out later.
Obi Wan knelt beside Anakin’s bed, took his flesh hand in both of his and pressed a kiss to the skin between his thumb and wrist.
‘I thought I’d never see you again,’ Anakin murmured, his eyes shining with tears.
‘Yes. I feared that too. I’ve missed you.’
Anakin was crying now, tears falling down his cheeks. ‘I’ve missed you too. You really have no idea.’
‘I tried to find you. Anakin, I need you to know that I never stopped trying and I never gave up. But we couldn’t sense you so we were relying on witnesses and traitors to give us the information we needed. That’s why it took so long. I’m sorry, you must have felt so abandoned, I –’
‘Master,’ Anakin interrupted, gripping Obi Wan’s hand very tightly. ‘How long have I been…Master Windu wouldn’t tell me…’
Obi Wan had to take a few deep breaths to steady himself before he said, ‘It’s been almost nine months, Anakin.’
To his intense surprise, Anakin seemed to visibly relax at that news.
‘There’s so much that I need to tell you,’ he said, shaking slightly as he tried to prop himself up on his elbows.
‘Not right now, dear one,’ Obi Wan said. ‘Just rest, we have the rest of our lives to talk about it.’
But Anakin was shaking his head. ‘No, it can’t wait, I –’
He broke off with a gasp when one of the babies started crying. At the sound, the other baby joined in and Obi Wan once again wondered why they were in here when Anakin clearly needed rest and not to be woken by crying infants.
‘They’re hungry,’ Anakin said, sounding marginally more alert than he did before. ‘I need to –’
‘You need to rest,’ Obi Wan said gently. ‘Just lie back. I’ll take the babies to the creche, I’m sure they’ll have some formula and then we can work out what we’re going to do…’
He trailed off at the distinctly unsettled feeling in the Force that seemed to hover around Anakin.
There was a long pause, during which Anakin sat stiff-shouldered with his head bowed, seeming torn about what he was going to do next. The babies’ cries grew louder, the sound combined with the distress they were sending out into the Force, tugging at Obi Wan’s heart. Tentatively, Obi Wan brushed up against the place where his mind met Anakin’s, trying to work out what he was thinking, but he was taken aback to find his shields sky high and sealed shut.
‘They’re going to need to eat,’ he said, wincing as the cries increased in pitch. He had utterly no idea what was going on here but it seemed that Anakin didn’t want to be separated from the children. It made little sense but if that’s what he wanted, Obi Wan saw no reason to put him through further distress. ‘They can stay here if you prefer, but I’ll need to get something for them.’
‘Well, um, actually, Master.’ Anakin ducked his head further and fiddled with the hem of his tunic. ‘If it’s okay, I’d like to feed them myself.’
Obi Wan stared at him, utterly confused. Feed them himself?
With pink colouring his cheeks, Anakin gently lifted both babies from their cribs and rested them on his thighs as he opened his tunic. Then he raised the children to his chest and Obi Wan watched in wondered as they parted their lips and started to nurse.
For a while there was no noise in the room except for the sound of the babies suckling. Anakin was staring at some point on the floor as if this required all of his concentration and his scent had taken on the smoky quality of shame.
It was like Obi Wan simultaneously knew exactly what must be going on while at the same time, found himself utterly convinced that he must be wrong. He was missing something, putting two and two together and getting five because there was no way, there was no way…
Anakin was twenty-one years old, for kriff’s sake! He was practically a child himself. On top of that, Obi Wan knew the tribe who had captured Anakin. He knew, without being told, what Anakin would have suffered during his imprisonment. It didn’t seem possible that he could have managed to…Two babies? It just couldn’t be right.
And yet, even as he thought it, he watched the boy gazing up at Anakin. His eyes were full of complete love and trust and Obi Wan felt he had seen that look many times. Because the boy had Anakin’s eyes.
Obi Wan waited until the twins had finished feeding and were cooing contentedly in Anakin’s arms. Anakin’s body was slightly curled over them, as if he was expecting to be admonished.
‘Anakin, I – I’m afraid that I don’t understand.’
Anakin cradled the babies to his chest, rocking them slightly in his arms.
‘I…um…’ He sounded dangerously close to tears and that wasn’t right. Obi Wan didn’t want him to be upset. ‘They’re mine,’ he said quietly. ‘Ours.’
For the first time since he’d started feeding his children, he met Obi Wan’s gaze with his own tear-filled one.
Obi Wan felt like the world had been turned upside down and back again but some of the pieces hadn’t fallen back into the right places. He stared, open-mouthed until suddenly, it came back to him. A small detail he’d been worrying over that had been so completely overshadowed as to be forgotten when Anakin went missing.
The last time they’d been together had coincided with Anakin being in pre-heat. Obi Wan had spent the day with him until he’d fallen asleep, only to wake up the next morning to find that his heat had passed. That was an uncharacteristically quick heat for Anakin who had merely shrugged this off when Obi Wan mentioned it. Then they stepped into that ambush and he and Obi Wan never had the opportunity to discuss it again.
But here was the answer: Anakin’s heat had ended so abruptly because he’d become pregnant. They had children together.
‘Oh, my love,’ Obi Wan said, an overwhelming feeling of love and protectiveness rushing through him. ‘You’ve just given birth? When? How old are they?’
Anakin shrugged. ‘I’m not completely sure. It was hard to keep track of time where I was and I don’t remember the trip back to Coruscant but maybe three or four days at the most?’ He let out a shuddery breath and it was only then that Obi Wan realized that he was shaking as if he was freezing and that the light tunic he was wearing was drenched in sweat. He swallowed thickly before saying, ‘I-I didn’t know. Not until…’ He trailed off but Obi Wan knew what he meant. Not until he was already trapped in that nightmare. Not until it was too late to be able to tell anyone. ‘Are you angry with me?’
Of all the things Obi Wan was feeling, anger at the remarkable young man in front of him was the absolute last one.
‘Dear one,’ he said in a half-exasperated, half-love-struck rush. ‘How could I ever be angry with you? I’m just so sorry that I couldn’t be there with you. Be there for you. The past months must have been torturous.’
It had been bad enough thinking about Anakin trapped by those madmen for all those months when Obi Wan didn’t know that his poor body had been trying to grow two babies. The idea of Anakin in the filthy cells where they keep prisoners while pregnant was almost more than he could stand. In fact, the only thing that was stopping him from raging or rushing out to find the people who did this so he could make them regret it for the rest of their lives (which would not be very long if Obi Wan had his way), was that he could sense that what Anakin needed now was calm, understanding and support. Obi Wan unleashing his fury would only upset him further.
Without realizing he was doing it, he stepped forward and cupped his hands around Anakin’s perfect face. He was utterly in awe of his beautiful mate who had withstood so much and not only survived but brought their two beautiful children back with him.
Abruptly, Anakin let his shields come tumbling down and Obi Wan was able to see everything. The gut-wrenching nausea that led to hours curled over the fresher, the waves of dizziness that made him feel like he was on the deck of a ship, the initial confusion and despair after feeling so utterly miserable for so long. Then the physical changes came and the shock of the realization that he was carrying a baby – no, two. Obi Wan watched in amazement as Anakin showed him how his belly had gone from flat and toned, to softer and softer and it rounded out into a beautiful baby bump Obi Wan longed to touch. He felt how Anakin’s hips and chest had ached and how the children moved incessantly, keeping him sane but also keeping him awake, until finally after hours of agony, Anakin got to hold them in his arms.
Obi Wan also noted that many of Anakin’s memories seemed edited, cut short, and that pain lingered in the gaps. There would be time to talk about what Anakin had endured in his months away, Obi Wan wanted to know everything, wanted to understand everything that would shape Anakin for years to come, but now, while Anakin was still so weak and vulnerable, was not the time.
Finally, he saw Anakin’s love and joy for their children relief, his relief at being found but also his worry that was centred on the Council and their reaction.
‘I passed out before I could tell Master Windu,’ he muttered. ‘But he’s going to find out. And I’m not sure that the Council will let me stay in the Order once they know.’
‘That doesn’t matter,’ Obi Wan said, sitting down on the edge of Anakin’s bed, wrapping his arm around his shoulders and giving him a firm squeeze. ‘Whatever happens, Anakin, I’ll be there with you. I never want us to be separated again. From now on, it’s going to be all four of us together.’
Anakin turned his head so that his face was pressed into Obi Wan’s shoulder. ‘You…You don’t have to be so nice about this. I know it’s not exactly what you signed up for when we started, you know, whatever this is.’
‘That’s the thing, Anakin,’ Obi Wan said. ‘I did, a hundred times over. I don’t know how you always seem to forget this, but when you were nine-years-old, I signed up for you. And I’m going to keep signing up for whatever being with you involves. Because that’s what I want.’
Anakin watched as Leia reached out and wrapped her tiny hand around Obi Wan’s finger. Her Force signature was a joy to behold; not quite Anakin’s and not quite his, but somehow a beautiful mixture of both.
‘They’re already so strong in the Force,’ Anakin said. ‘I could sense them reaching out, even when they were still inside me.’
‘Well, look who their parent is,’ Obi Wan said, running his fingers through Anakin’s hair and gently untangling some snags in his curls.
‘Who their parents are,’ Anakin corrected, looking at Obi Wan with pure adoration. It was something Obi Wan had always loved about Anakin; how utterly and completely he felt his emotions.
‘Have you thought of names?’
‘Yeah,’ Anakin murmured. ‘While I was captured…thinking about our children was the only thing that kept me going. I’ve thought about them a lot. How do you feel about Luke and Leia?’
Obi Wan pressed a kiss to the crown of his head. ‘I think those sound absolutely perfect. And I want you to know that it's okay now. Everything is going to be all right.'
And with Anakin back by his side and holding their two perfect children, Obi Wan believed that with his whole heart.