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Ever since she was little, Nuru was obsessed with the sky.
Her mother would constantly joke that her first word was stars.
(She had it on good authority that that was a lie, but whenever she asked, her mother refused to tell her what it actually was.)
Her mother never really understood. To her credit, when Nuru was younger, she made an effort. They went on several stargazing expeditions together as a family. She and her sister would place bets on how long it would take for her to retreat back into the castle. Her record was 3 minutes.
She had always been an observant child. She saw the way her mother's eyes would twitch and her hands would tremble as her chin tilted towards the sky. She’d heard stories about the meteor storms. She would hide behind the wall with her sister as her parents gathered with scientists in the throne room, discussing words that neither of them quite understood. Bunkers. Preparation. Destruction.
“The comet is getting closer,” she’d heard one astronomer say. “Another meteor storm is approaching, and I fear that they’re only going to become more frequent.”
She could feel the stress beginning to rise. Over time, she saw her parents less and less. They began to shut themselves off. Those meetings morphed from hushed whispers in the dead of night to constant screaming matches that neither she nor her sister dared eavesdrop on. She gravitated towards her older sister, looking to her for guidance, but she could see the tension in her jaw and knew she was just as afraid as she was.
One night, she walked into the common room and found her father, hunched over a large textbook. The room was dark, with heavy curtains pulled over the windows. His face was lit by a small lantern.
“What are you doing awake, baby?” he’d asked.
“I can’t sleep,” she whimpered, tugging on his pant leg.
He sighed, looking down at her fondly before he pulled her onto his lap. He pointed at the star map that stretched across both pages of his book.
“Do you know what that one’s called?” he asked.
Her face lit up as she nodded.
“Ursa major!”
He smiled, ruffling her hair.
“That’s right! Do you remember the story I told you about it?”
She bit her lip before she gasped.
“Yeah!”
“Why don’t you tell it to me?” he asked. “I think I might have forgotten it.”
There was a time in her life when the scariest thing she could think of was the dark. It was a physical manifestation of the unknown. It had the potential to house creatures so horrifying that her own brain couldn’t comprehend them.
Those years were spent in her dad's arms. Nights spent curled against his chest as they lay on the damp midnight grass. He would curl around her, and chase those monsters away.
When Nuru was 12 years old, the monsters became real.
She could remember like it was yesterday.
She remembered how it began. Tucked under her duvet, holding a small candle as she read a textbook she had stolen from her dad’s study. It was stuffy- she could hardly breathe, but she’d already been scolded by one of the maids, and her mind was moving too fast to go to sleep.
She remembered the smell before she remembered the sound. It was sharp.
Dusty.
For a second, she thought something was wrong with her candle. Quickly, she pinched the flame with her fingers, looking over the wax to make sure she hadn’t dropped something on it.
Everything went still when she heard the first crash.
She blinked, shaking her head. The maids weren’t known for their clumsiness, but every once in a while, the maid assigned to her section of the castle would keep her up for hours.
When she heard the second crash, she lifted her head slowly from under the covers. Her room was dark- small nightlights sat in each corner, opposing colors of green, purple, and blue that mixed to create a faint rainbow that flickered on the walls.
The smell was still there. She sniffed the air, stepping carefully towards her window.
Another crash.
The walls almost seemed to rattle, and she needed to take a second to breathe as her legs began to wobble.
She yanked the curtains down.
Nuru could still remember the fire.
The pale rainbow light was overtaken by red. Everywhere she looked was red. She reached out to touch the window and flinched backward as she felt the heat on her fingertips. She looked to the left and jumped backward as she watched flames engulf the roof of a nearby tower.
Another crash. This time, she could see what had caused it.
A massive rock came hurtling out of the sky. It hit the roof outside her window, shattering into tiny pieces that came flying toward her. As soon as they hit the window, it shattered. She ducked to cover her head, but she didn’t move quick enough. Small shards of glass nicked her cheek, her hands, her arms-
She fell to the floor as she ran backward. She scrambled to her feet, racing towards the door.
The hallway was pandemonium.
What had been faint, muffled screams were loud enough to make her ears ring. She gasped, jumping backward as a woman ran past her, screaming hysterically.
It was loud. Her heart felt like it was about to explode. Her eyes stung. She was scared.
She raced down the stairs, covering her head as the explosions continued. The whole castle seemed to sway, causing her to cling to the banister as she went.
“Mommy!” she screamed. “Daddy!”
Figures kept moving past her. Some even collided with her as they went, but they were too absorbed in their own panic to notice the little sobbing girl by their knees.
She threw a door open, looking around as she heaved. She needed a familiar face. She needed her sister. She needed her mother. She needed her dad-
The ground under her feet shook as a meteor caused the wall she was standing under to collapse. The splintered wood and the broken pieces of rock created a small dust cloud, causing her to cough. She looked through the remains of the castle in horror at the sky.
Rocks were falling like raindrops, burning on the way down.
“Nuru!”
She gasped, looking through the door. Before she had time to react, her dad grabbed her wrist, tugging her toward his chest. As soon as she moved, a rock the size of her head slammed where she’d been standing. She whimpered as he curled himself over her shaking frame, protecting her from the shower of debris.
“Come on baby, this way,” he yelled.
She sniffed, gripping his hand tight as he pulled her down the hallway.
With her dad by her side, the fear settled, but it didn’t subside. His eyes were red- she knew that he had been crying. He shouted instructions that she didn’t understand at people as they ran past.
“Just a little bit further,” he whispered.
“Help!” a voice cried out through the chaos. “Help!”
The two of them whipped around. Another wall had collapsed, and under the rubble, a woman was clawing hysterically at the ground. Her dad looked up at the sky and frowned.
He knelt to her level, gripping her shoulders.
“Nuru. I need you to listen to me, OK?”
She nodded. He smiled, wiping her tears with his thumb.
“You need to find mommy, OK? She’s over by the cellar. She’s helping people get to safety. She’ll tell you what to do.”
“Daddy, I’m scared,” she sobbed. “Please don’t go.”
He let out a choked noise, pulling her head to his shoulder. He ran his hand lightly through her hair.
“I know. I know, baby. It’ll be OK,” he whispered.
She pressed herself closer. Her lip began to wobble as he peeled her hands away. He gripped her wrists as he pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead.
“I love you, baby,” he said as he pushed her forward. He smiled at her as she turned around before he ran to the woman’s side, helping to dig her out from the debris.
Everything started to come in flashes.
Smoke.
Her lungs burned. It hurt to breathe.
Faces she couldn’t recognize raced past.
A small bead of blood trickled down her face. She touched it with her finger.
She remembered her mom screaming.
Then there was silence.
She curled under her sister’s arm, safely underground. They could still hear the explosions. It seemed the entire kingdom was here- kept safe in labyrinthian tunnels that seemed to be older than she was.
There were so many people, yet there also weren’t enough.
A woman sobbed for her husband.
A man pushed through the crowd, searching for his child.
She couldn’t find her dad.
The memory of the day was vivid, but as the years went on, her memories of her dad became hazy.
She couldn’t remember his funeral. Figures seemed to float past her, muttering the same cookie-cutter words.
I’m sorry for your loss.
He was a wonderful man.
I’m here if you need to talk.
That day, it had rained. She stared at the window as massive raindrops collected on the glass. The clouds were jagged and gray, covering up the midday sun.
She wasn’t afraid of the dark anymore.
Every year, the meteors came back. Memory and reality seemed to blur together. She could never tell when she was remembering, and when she was experiencing.
In other words, she didn’t get much sleep.
She found other things to do with her time. She didn’t need to hide under her duvet anymore- the maids eventually accepted that the light would be on under her door late into the night.
Her time was spent studying the stars. Sometimes she’d climb onto the roof outside her window. In another universe, she liked to imagine her dad was by her side, pointing at his favorite constellations, and telling her their stories.
She sighed as she crawled back into her room as the night grew colder. She shivered, adjusting the blanket that hung off of her shoulders so it covered bare skin.
She waddled out the door- she didn’t have the energy to read her textbook, but her brain was moving miles a minute.
She walked down the hallway- it was cold and silent. Her bare feet padded across the stone floor. She probably should have put on slippers, but it was late and she wasn’t thinking clearly.
A loud noise caused her to stop. She tried to move but her body wouldn’t let her.
“Nuru!”
“Come on baby, this way,”
“Daddy, I’m scared!”
“Nuru!”
“Nuru?”
Nuru blinked as her vision wobbled. Her feet almost stung from the cold, giving her something to hold onto as her brain weaved sensations together into a weird, muddy blur.
“Nuru.”
A hand found her shoulder, causing Nuru to start. She flinched away, grasping at the air as she tried to breathe. Her lungs began to ache, causing her to clench the blanket tighter.
“Nuru, you need to breathe,” a voice cut through the fog.
She swallowed back a sob. She blinked back tears, making eye contact with her sister. She leaned over her, hands hovering over her arms.
“Zuri?” she whispered. Her voice cracked as she tried to speak.
“Hey, you with me?” she asked. Nuru swallowed a lump in her throat, nodding.
“What happened?”
“I dropped my bowl and you flipped out,” she said quietly. She nudged Nuru’s arm lightly, guiding her into the kitchen. She settled onto a bar stool, shivering as her blanket began to slip. Zuri stumbled, grabbing it as it fell, and wrapping it back around her. Nuru smiled gratefully, wiping her eyes.
She made eye contact with a bag of flour, left it open on the counter, and blinked.
“Why are you baking?” she snorted.
Zuri raised an eyebrow, taking the seat next to her.
“Why not?”
“It’s like 3 in the morning.”
Zuri shrugged uncomfortably. Now that Nuru had calmed down a little bit, she was able to get a proper look at her sister. She was dressed in the same fancy dress she always was. A pink ruffled skirt fell down to her ankles, laced with gold trims. Her hair was pinned back into a neat ponytail. A butterfly clip caught the light as she turned her head. She was so well put together, it was almost like-
Nuru paused.
It was almost like she hadn’t slept at all.
Nuru pursed her lips.
“You’re not sleeping.”
Zuri scoffed.
“Like you’re one to talk.”
Nuru huffed a small laugh. The silence that came after was heavy, like a thick fog. It almost seemed to choke her. She rolled her tongue behind her teeth, taking a stuttered breath when-
“Do you want to talk about it?” Zuri asked.
Nuru blinked. Her body seemed to deflate as Zuri spoke.
“Talk about what?”
“Nuru, I dropped a bowl and you started freaking out.”
“I’ll tell you if you tell me why you’re baking at 3am.”
Zuri raised her hands defensively. Nuru raised a prompting eyebrow.
“Fine. I had a nightmare. Happy?”
Nuru grinned.
“Very.”
Zuri shoved her head.
“I hate you.”
“No you don’t,” Nuru beamed, resting her head on her shoulder. Zuri scoffed.
“OK, I told you. Now you tell me what happened.”
Nuru sighed, shoving her sister back lightly.
“I had a nightmare too.” Zuri opened her mouth to speak, but before she could, Nuru was cutting her off. “It- I get really jumpy after. So I guess when I heard the bowl I kind of lost it.”
“Kind of?”
Nuru glared.
“I’m going to beat you up.”
Zuri let out a loud laugh.
“Please, with those noodle arms?”
Nuru glowered, crossing her arms as she huffed.
The two of them sighed. She could always ask Zuri what her nightmare was about. But truth be told, she didn’t need to. They both knew what demon was keeping them awake at night. It was a constant, lingering thing. Something that remained unspoken whenever the skies were clear. As if 100 normal nights could ever be enough to erase the pain and terror the 101st would bring.
Zuri let out a small puff of air.
“I overheard mom talking to the royal astronomers the other day.”
Nuru blinked.
“Oh?”
“The- they’re not going away,” Zuri said carefully. “They think it’s going to get worse.”
“How much worse?”
Zuri shrugged.
“They don’t know.”
“What do we do?” Nuru asked.
“What can we do, Nuru? I don’t-”
“There has to be something!”
“We don’t die. We don’t die and we let mom and the royal astronomers handle it,” Zuri said firmly.
"But-"
"Nuru. Leave it."
Nuru scoffed. That had always been what made her and her older sister so different. While Zuri was careful and obedient, Nuru was reckless. Where Zuri would step back and listen for instructions, Nuru would already have disappeared, prepared to climb to the highest point she could or find the thickest book she could find, and craft her own solution. As kids, it had made them two peas in a pod- they kept each other balanced. As they were growing up, it was creating a rift between them. They handled their fear so differently that it was almost impossible to communicate.
It made her cherish moments like these. Moments in the middle of the night, when no one was there, kneading dough in the empty kitchen. It was as close as they were going to get to a normal sibling relationship, and it was everything they both needed.
Baking quickly devolved. Soon, the two were throwing flour at each other, giggling like children. Nuru squawked as a ball of flour hit her square in the nose.
She twisted her arm to throw more flour at Zuri. Zuri let out a cry of alarm.
“Nuru! Be careful!” She warned. Nuru’s head whipped around, causing Zuri to cringe as the motion nudged the cup that had been precariously leaning over the corner of the table. It hit the floor with a loud crash.
“Nuru!”
“Daddy, where are you?”
“Nuru are you alright?”
“Deep breaths, in and out, that’s it.”
“Nuru!” a voice caused Nuru to flinch. She blinked, clenching her fists. The world seemed muggy as she took one careful step forward. Her legs wobbled, threatening to buckle, causing her to grip a nearby tree.
She scrunched her nose. There was smoke, but it wasn’t the metallic smoke she was used to.
Now that she thought about it, there weren’t any trees in the castle?
She crunched leaves under her feet as she dug into the dirt with her heels.
What happened?
“Nuru? Nuru, are you OK?”
Yong’s voice was small and timid. It was like a breath of fresh air as she tried to claw her way back to reality.
Yong.
Her brain started to catch up with her. Memories of the trials, of Hugo, of Varian, and Yong started to float above the nightmare she’d been caught in.
She rubbed her eyes, looking at Yong who was a few feet away from her. He had one arm extended, unsure whether to try and touch her or not. He was covered head to toe in soot. Which for Yong, wasn’t totally abnormal, but it still made her scrunch her eyebrows.
She heard more voices, causing her to flinch. She covered her ears as the clashing sounds made her head hurt. A sob ripped out from her chest as she leaned against the tree. Everything was so loud. She was going to implode.
She lowered her hands from her ears as the sound of rushing blood to her head grew louder. She felt something warm dripping down her face. Her mouth tasted salty.
Through her heaved breaths, she could hear more voices adding to the wave of sound that was causing her to drown.
“What….”
“Firework….. went off……. accident. ……. Nuru….”
The sound of her own name caused her heart to stutter against her chest. She sunk back down into the memory. In one ear, she could hear the voices. If she listened carefully, she could hear Yong’s terrified cries. On the other, she could hear the crackling of fire. The sound of rocks colliding with the castle floor. The constant, terrified screams that swirled around her like a tornado-
“Nuru?” she heard. She blinked, staring at a figure that had crouched down in front of her. She let out another sob.
“Daddy,” she whimpered.
She heard the figure let out a breath. They shifted to sit on their knees, holding their hands out without making contact.
“Nuru, I don’t know where you are right now, but I need you to come back to me, OK?”
She swallowed. The voice gave her something to cling to. She held on for dear life.
“Ok,” the voice said quietly. “Alright.”
She sniffed, wiping her face. The blurry figure smiled at her. They were coming more into focus.
“Nuru, this is Varian. We’re just outside Neserdnia, OK? Yong set off a firework by accident. That’s what the loud bang was. He’s OK. You’re not hurt, everything’s OK. You’re safe. Wherever your brain is taking you right now, it’s not happening. I just need you to breathe.”
Varian’s voice sent relief rushing through her veins. Her jaw began to click as her muscles shook. She rubbed her eyes even harder, trying to get the tears to stop falling.
“Nuru, hey. Can you breathe with me?” he asked. She shrugged. He placed one hand on his belly, taking a deep breath before he exhaled.
“Like that. In for 4, out for 6. I’ll count with you, OK?”
“I- I don’t know if I-” she stammered.
“It’s alright if you don’t do it perfectly,” he said quickly. “Trust me, breathing really helps.”
He looked at her firmly. Her chest began to ache as she finally nodded.
“OK, OK great!” he smiled. “Alright, I’ll count. In for 1. 2. 3. 4. Out for 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6.”
Her ribcage seemed to creak as she forced her muscles to slow down to Varian’s pace. She swallowed a lump that had formed in her throat, trying to soothe the soreness. As her fingers stopped tingling, her eyes started to feel heavy. She opened and closed her fists.
Finally, after what seemed like hours, she could feel her body again. It was like her feet had touched the ground after hours of falling. She slumped against the tree, letting out a relieved sigh.
She smacked her lips.
“Sorry,” she mumbled.
“Don’t apologize. I’m just glad you’re OK,” Varian said, scooting to sit next to her. He still kept himself a safe distance away from her.
She sighed.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me. It’s like one second I was telling Yong not to move his firework, and the next second I was back-” she felt her mouth go dry as the tremors started again.
“Don’t- you don’t have to tell me,” he said. “It makes it worse. At least it does when I have flashbacks.”
“You get them too?”
Varian went still. He stammered for a second before he clicked his jaw shut. He seemed to wrestle with himself for a moment before he sighed.
“Yeah. I do.“
Her eyes widened. He crossed his arms, pulling his legs to his chest.
“It’s not as bad as it used to be but uh. Yeah. I don’t do well in snow. Especially when it’s windy.”
“Snow?” She blinked. “Why snow?”
Varian bit his lip. He looked into the distance. The conflict on his face was clear. He seemed to have come to a decision as he turned to face her.
“I- something happened when I was 14. It-” he took a shaky breath. “It was really bad. Every time I get reminded of it, my brain gets all muddy and it’s almost like I’m 14 again.”
Nuru wiped her eyes, nodding.
“It happened in a blizzard so now I just- it brings up bad memories.”
Varian ran his hands across his face.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to make this about me I just- I want you to know you’re not alone. I’m here if you want to talk about it when you’re feeling better.”
Nuru had thought she’d run out of tears, but she let out a small whimper as she felt more begin to press against her eyes. Before she could think, she was leaning in, wrapping her hands around Varian’s shoulders and pressing herself against his chest.
“Thank you,” she whispered.
Varian let out a small, fond laugh as he wrapped his own arms around her.
“No problem, princess.”
To say the next few days were strange would be an understatement.
She hadn’t realized how much she had been hovering just outside of the group. She didn’t realize how much she’d craved the silent nods and the small inside jokes. As she and Varian grew closer, it was like she was taking a breath of fresh air.
Something between them had just clicked. They’d become inseparable. It drove Hugo mad, which was another bonus.
Speaking of Hugo, she could always rely on him to be a constant. He was his same, irritating, snarky self. Every day it was a miracle she didn’t throttle that man. He’d probably find something shitty to say before he died too. Just to make her mad.
How someone could be this awful was anyone’s guess. How Varian put up with him enough to not ditch him at the next town was also a complete mystery.
Yong at least sort of made sense. He just liked everyone. She didn’t think she’d ever see the day when he would actively say the words ‘I hate you,’
But some days, Varian would seem just as fed up with him as she was. It made it all the more baffling when she would see them getting along in the lab tent when she’d creep in for a beaker or two.
Boys. They were so complicated.
She flinched as a raindrop hit her face. She hadn’t even noticed the sky turn grey as she sat outside by the caravan. Another one hit the end of her nose. She sighed. The morning sky had been so blue, but it seemed like fate had other plans.
Goosebumps began to crawl up her arms as the warm spring air was whisked away by an ice-cold wind. Varian poked his head out from the caravan, frowning at the sky as he held his hand out.
She followed his gaze, watching as dark clouds began to fold into each other, creating a massive wall of grey. She chewed the bottom of her lip. Koto didn’t get many thunderstorms, but she knew enough about clouds to know that was a bad sign.
She looked over at Varian who seemed to have come to the same conclusion she had. He hummed, pulling out his map.
His eyes lit up as he pulled out a pen, circling the paper before looking over at her.
“There’s a town about an hour West. The storm’s a good 4 or 5 hours away at least. We should have time to find an inn to wait it out.”
She smiled, nodding. She opened her mouth to respond, but before she could, Hugo’s head poked out from the caravan.
“What’s the holdup? I want to get settled and eat,” he grumbled.
Varian rolled his eyes.
“We’re not camping, Glasses. We’re going to find an inn.”
Hugo raised an eyebrow. He looked up at the sky as a raindrop hit his glasses.
“So we’re just going to waste all our money because Little Miss Perfect can’t handle getting her hair wet?”
Varian dragged his hands across his face.
“We’re not camping out in the middle of a thunderstorm. I’m renting a room. Feel free to go sleep out in the storm if you really want to. I don’t care.”
Hugo scoffed, rolling his eyes. Varian’s eyes narrowed at him. He raised his eyebrows. If Nuru hadn’t spent so much time with him, she would have missed the way he seemed to shrink under his stare. There was something she was missing- like they were speaking through facial expressions alone. It seemed to be happening more and more with them. She didn’t have time to speculate before Hugo was throwing his hands up like a child.
“Fine. Fine. Spend all our money. Whatever.”
Varian snickered, grabbing his backpack from the ground and circling around the caravan to take the reins. Hugo trailed after him, continuing to grumble as he shoved his way past her.
Nuru rolled her eyes, breathing in the cold, humid air before she retreated into the caravan.
It turned out that meteorology could safely be crossed off of Varian’s future career endeavors.
The storm hit as soon as they made it to town. Varian stopped at the first inn he found. The four covered their heads with their bags, racing to find shelter as they were pelted with massive raindrops. The wind was strong enough that she had to stumble as she moved, fighting to keep from being knocked over.
They all gasped for breath against the door of the inn as they pushed their way through. As soon as the door was shut, Hugo glared at Varian. Varian grinned sheepishly.
“OK, so my math was a little bit off.”
“A little? Goggles you were a good 4 hours off.”
“OK well I didn’t see you trying to help,” Varian snarked back.
“Yeah well, you didn’t ask. Sorry for not being a mind reader and assuming you knew how to do basic math.”
“Well, you were the peabrain who wanted to camp out during the storm. How’s that plan working out?” Varian snarled.
“Don’t you pin this on me-”
Nuru tuned them out. She looked over at Yong who only shrugged. She’d figured out during their time together, that it was easier to just let them fight it out than it was to try and mediate.
The inn was cozy and warm. The dark wooden floors were polished, reflecting the soft glow from the fireplace. The walls were thick, muffling the sound of rain. She could still hear the wind howling as it hit the windows, and every once in a while, the glass would begin to vibrate. If she listened closely, she could hear faint rumbles out in the distance.
She smiled over at the innkeeper as she headed towards the desk. As the rumbling grew louder, she sighed, rubbing her wrist.
She had a feeling it was going to be a long night.
A clap of thunder sent Nuru clawing at her chest as she flung the covers off. She gasped for air as she felt her heart continue to race.
Another crash caused her entire body to go rigid. She jumped out of bed, shaking the sheets off of her as she paced around the room. She ran her hands through her hair, wiping her eyes as she looked out the window.
The rain had picked up even more, making it impossible to see past the windowsill. A flash of light caused her to jump away. She tripped, falling to the floor with a loud oof. Adrenaline caused her hands to shake, and she knew it would be pointless to try and sleep again.
She shook her head as she heard familiar voices ringing in the distance. She grabbed her notebook and dashed out of the room.
The hallway was practically black as she crept her way through. She dragged her hands against the walls, using them to find her way back out into the inn lobby. She smiled as her hand met the door, causing it to jiggle silently on its hinges.
She swung it open and blinked as the warmth of the fireplace hit her. It had to be at least 3 or 4 in the morning. There was no way anyone was awake. That was a serious fire hazard.
She shook her head, creeping into the room. She made her way towards one of the couches circling the fireplace.
She blinked as she made eye contact with a figure hunched over a book in the center of the couch. The figure’s head snapped up to meet hers.
All of a sudden, she and Hugo were staring at each other, both equally dumbfounded.
He looked down at his book, then up at her, then down at his book again before he glared.
“I’m not moving. I was here first.”
Nuru raised her hands defensively.
“I wasn’t going to ask you to move.”
Hugo scoffed, leaning back into the couch. She glared at him. Normally, she’d go find somewhere else to sit, but a petty voice in the back of her head urged her to take the chair next to him. She was too tired to ignore it.
She could feel Hugo’s glare as she nestled into the corner by the arm of the chair. She shrugged him off, cracking open her notebook to her unfinished sketch. She chewed the inside of her mouth as she began to trace her pencil along the paper.
The tension was thick enough to cut as the two sat almost facing each other. She knew Hugo could feel it too. He was tapping a rhythm into the armrest of his chair that was steadily getting faster. It seemed like both of them were too proud to retreat, stuck in this awkward, uncomfortable limbo at way too early o’clock in the morning.
She felt the walls shake before she heard the clap of thunder. This one was louder than the others. She couldn’t help but flinch, causing her pencil to go flying out of her hand. She cringed. That was probably the opposite of subtle. She braced herself. If Hugo was an ass before, he was going to be completely intolerable now.
She cracked one eye open, preparing herself for the worst. She paused as her eyes opened wider and she could see Hugo properly.
He had gone completely rigid, staring at the wall. If she didn’t know him any better, she’d almost think he was a statue. The only signs of life were the small, hitched breaths that caused his chest to stutter irregularly.
She caught a tear slip down his face that he quickly tried to blink away.
Neither of them moved. She held her breath. Hugo pursed his lips, rolling his tongue behind his teeth.
“Are you-”
“Save it,” he spat.
She clicked her jaw shut, wrapping her arms around her knees. Hugo took a shaky breath.
“Not a word, OK princess?”
Stubborn as ever, Nuru shook her head.
“You’re scared of thunder?”
Hugo scoffed, pressing his back further into the couch. He curled into himself, like a frightened rat that had been backed into a corner. He seemed so small. He was a far cry from the obnoxious thief she’d grown to hate.
He glared at her again. The venom behind his glare was quickly overshadowed as another clap of thunder caused the both of them to jump. He seemed to know when he was defeated. He sighed, slumping against the back of the chair.
“Yeah. I’m scared of thunder. Whatever. Wanna go point and laugh at the orphan who can’t handle a little bit of lightning? Be my guest Princess,” he snarled.
“I’m not making fun of you,” she said carefully. “I’d be a hypocrite if I was.”
Hugo rolled his eyes.
“There’s a pretty big difference between me being scared of thunder and you, Princess.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“What do you think it’s supposed to mean?”
Nuru gritted her teeth.
“You know, you aren’t the only one who’s dealt with hardship, Hugo.”
“Oh? You want to tell me about all the hardship you dealt with living in a massive castle with servants catering to your every whim? Give me a break.”
“Do I need to remind you why I’m here?” she snapped. All the anger she’d been pushing to the side around him came bubbling to the surface. She didn’t hold it back as her face began to burn. “I grew up in a palace that gets destroyed by meteors every year. I grew up watching my entire kingdom burn down and watched everyone slowly give up rebuilding. Stars, you want to talk about parents? I grew up without a dad because I had to watch my dad sacrifice himself to save someone’s life.”
Hugo blinked, clearly trying to cut in, but Nuru was having none of it.
“I’m sorry your life sucked Hugo, I really am. I know you hate me because people like me treated you badly, but that doesn’t mean you get to treat me like dirt.”
Nuru gasped for air as she finished her rant. She hadn’t even realized she’d been raising her voice, but as she finished, her voice echoed off of the walls.
Something Nuru couldn’t quite read flashed across Hugo’s face. If she didn’t know him any better, she’d call it guilt.
He chewed his lip, wrapping his arms around his waist. He mirrored her position, pulling his legs to his chest.
“I didn’t know about your dad.”
“Most people don’t. I don’t talk about it.”
Hugo hummed.
“I don’t- I’ve never actually told anyone about my thing with thunderstorms,” he said quietly. Nuru’s eyes widened, as she leaned in closer. Hugo chuckled. “Well, kind of. Goggles worked it out on his own but I don’t really count that since I didn’t actually- tell him.”
Nuru nodded.
“Varian knows?”
Hugo snorted.
“Yeah. He’s really nosy when he wants to be.”
Nuru huffed a small laugh.
“I think he just wants to help.”
Hugo sighed.
“Yeah well, I don’t really do well with help. I’m not 5.”
“Everyone needs help sometimes, Hugo.”
Hugo let out a small tiff. Nuru sucked in a small sigh.
“I’m not really scared of thunderstorms. I’m- it’s loud noises,” she explained. “I don’t think my brain has really registered that I’m not in Koto anymore, so whenever I hear thunder I get so confused. I know I’m here, and I know I’m safe, but something in the back of my head won’t let it go.”
Nuru fidgeted uncomfortably. She twisted around so her feet were resting on the couch as she leaned her head on the back.
“It’s really scary. I’ve- I’ve spent so long dealing with it but I just- I’ve never actually been able to figure out how to talk about it without sounding pathetic.”
“I don’t think you’re pathetic,” Hugo mumbled.
Nuru felt her eyebrows raise out of her skull. She blinked, looking at him to make sure he really was Hugo, and not an alien wearing his skin. He seemed equally as taken aback. His eyes flitted around the room before they settled on the door. For a split second, she thought he was going to bolt, but then he looked at her as his eyes softened and she cracked a small smile.
“For what it’s worth, I don’t think you’re pathetic either. You’re allowed to be scared. It doesn’t make me think any less of you.”
Hugo’s forehead creased as he stared at her. For a second, she thought she said something wrong. She squirmed under his stare, trying to find the safest escape plan in case things went wrong-
“Thanks, Nuru, I- I really appreciate it,” he said. His voice was barely a whisper.
“You’re welcome.”
“Also uh, Princess?”
Nuru raised her head as Hugo began to play with his hands awkwardly. She could practically see beads of sweat begin to form on his forehead. Her curiosity began to spike.
“Yeah?”
“I’m sorry for misjudging you. I haven’t been giving you a fair chance.”
Nuru had to take a second to recover from the whiplash of hearing the words “I’m sorry” coming out of Hugo’s mouth.
“I- Thank you, Hugo.”
Hugo gave her a lopsided smirk.
Silence blanketed the room again, and while it was just as awkward as it had been before, the tension was gone.
They weren’t friends. There was no guarantee that as soon as the sun came up that Hugo would do anything other than revert back to his normal, greasy self, but Nuru couldn’t help but think that the Hugo she knew wasn’t the real Hugo. There was something raw behind his eyes- something that he’d learned to hide away from the constant years of living in fear.
They were so different, but they had that in common, it seemed.
Still, she would be lying if she said Hugo wasn’t at least a little bit comforting. He was definitely better than staring at the ceiling until her brain spilled out of her ears, at least.
The thunder was quieter than it had been earlier, but it was still loud enough to keep her on edge. If she heard Hugo begin to hum a tune loud enough to drown out the sound, she wasn’t going to comment on it.
And if the next morning, Varian found the two of them out cold on the couches, he didn’t say anything. He closed the door and let them sleep.