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“Fraser, what’s this?”
Fraser turned, squinting at the lumpy brown object Ray was holding. “I believe it’s a potato, Ray,” he said.
Ray closed his eyes and let out a deep breath, and Fraser had to fight to keep from grinning. Ray was too easy to rile up with a well-placed faux-naive comment, and he always looked so good when he was trying to keep his temper. “I know it’s a potato,” he finally said. “What I’m really wondering is what it was doing under my bed.”
“Ah, well,” Fraser started, then frowned. “I don’t know why there would be a potato under your bed.” He crossed the room to where Ray was sitting next to his bed and knelt down on the floor next to him. “Let me see it?”
“With pleasure,” Ray muttered, passing the tuber to Fraser with a grimace, before flopping back onto his stomach and sticking his head back under the bed.
Fraser examined the potato. It was dry and wrinkly, a bit shriveled, and the eyes had all sprouted long white tendrils. He sniffed it: it hadn’t truly rotted, so it mostly smelled of the dust under Ray’s bed and a bit of dirt, but there was a hint of something… He stuck his tongue out and touched it to a the skin.
“Ah, Fraser, you really gotta lick everything, don’t you?” Ray said, coming up from under the bed with a plastic storage tub in hand, his hair coated in a fine layer of dust, and a smudge of dirt on his cheekbone. “If you really want something to lick,” he added, leaning in and leering at Fraser, “I can think of something better.”
Fraser smiled and shook his head. “Do you want to know why this potato was under your bed?”
Ray sighed and leaned back against the bed. “You know what? I changed my mind. I don’t care. I found my yearbooks, and that’s what I went looking for. Here, let me show you the—.”
“These are canine tooth marks,” Fraser said, cutting Ray off. “To be precise, they are Canis lupus familiaris tooth marks.”
Ray stared at him. “You telling me the wolf has been squirreling away potatoes under my bed?”
Fraser shrugged. “Sometimes he gets some crazy ideas in his head. He was likely saving them for a rainy day.” He reached across with his free hand and carefully brushed away the smudge of dirt from Ray’s cheekbone, drawing a soft sigh from Ray. “I suspect there are more hidden in various places around your apartment.”
Ray shrugged and leaned across to press a soft kiss to Fraser’s mouth. “Well, it could be worse,” Ray said, his words warm against Fraser’s lips. “It could’ve been pizza.”
“Oh no, Ray,” Fraser said, dropping the potato to the floor and reaching up to thread his fingers through Ray’s hair, “he’d never do that. He has no self control when it comes to pizza.”
Ray laughed softly and shook his head before diving in for a deeper kiss, potato fully forgotten.