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The three of them were sitting in Rand's room, just chatting after their dnd session. His parents weren't home, so Rolan and Kian were sleeping over.
Speaking of which- Kian was excitedly telling a story, flailing his arms around. Rand and Rolan were laying entangled on the beanbag, laughing at the crazy recounting of events being told.
"-so I just hopped through the window, but I guess Mr. Dickman didn't like that? Becky fuckin loved it tho-"
After every chuckle, Rand would try to take a deep breath, his body creaking with effort. Everything started to feel more and more hazy as time went on. He found himself unable to focus his eyes, his face burning up.
What started as a laugh, now ended in a coughing and wheezing as he tried to catch his breath. He pushed himself off of Rolan, letting himself fall onto the floor. Rolan quickly stood up, eyes wide with shock.
"Kian- I don't think Rand is getting any air"
Kian paused his story, looking over to see Rand now on his knees desperately trying to suck in air. It would've looked funny, if it hadn't been so concerning.
Rand's chest hurt. The corners of his vision were turning black, and fireflies danced around everywhere he looked.
He could feel a hand on his back. "What's going on, man?" Kian must've walked over as his voice was much closer now.
He tried to choke out a response (not that he knew what to say), but all that came out was a wheezing and more coughing.
A rush of fresh, cold air filled the room. Rand tilted his head up slightly, to see Rolan over by the window. "Does that help?" He could hear the concern in his voice.
He nodded. "Roof" Rand managed to force out, taking (or at least trying to take) a big gulp of air after. He forced his body to get up. His knees were wobbling, and he had to push himself up using the coffee table, knocking over some dnd stuff.
"I got you, hang on" Kian put his arm under and around his shoulder, walking him towards the window. Another pair of arms stretched out from the window, picking Rand up and setting him down on the roof tiles.
A hand on his face, Rolan. "Okay, now breathe slowly. Try to hold it a couple seconds. I know it hurts, but it'll help"
Rand produced a stuttery breath. A deep breath in through the mouth. He was only able to hold it for a second, before a quick breath out. And repeat.
Kian put his hand on his, squeezing gently. "I'll count, you focus on breathing. Just follow my lead.
"Breathe in-'' the fingers of his other hand went up one by one, until four were raised. "Now hold for four" he squeezed Rand's hand again "out through the mouth; one, two, three, four, aand hold again. One, two, three, four. Okay just a couple more times"
Rand didn't know how many times they repeated the process, but after a while he was no longer wheezing and his whole body was starting to feel sluggish.
He didn't know how long they sat there. The sun had already gone down, so they just watched the stars in silence, no one spoke. Occasionally Rolan would glance over at Rand, but he calmed down, seemingly pleased to see his friend's relaxed form.
At some point Kian lit up a smoke, only the sound of the lighter and his deep breaths filling the silence. His eyes met Rand's, and he opened his arms in an invitation. Usually Rand would get flustered or make a joke about them being a bunch of queers, but he was way too tired to argue and just let himself be pulled into an embrace.
His eyes were closed at this point, they were so heavy. He could fall asleep right here. Kian was combing through his hair with his hands, his chest rising and falling as Rand laid on top of it. Someone gently squeezed his hand, and he opened his eyes to see Rolan looking at him.
"You feeling any better?" His voice was soft, laced with nothing but concern and empathy.
"Yeah, I can breathe again. Sorry about all that" Rand softly chuckled, blushing as he looked away.
"Did anything like this happen before?" Under the softness of his voice there was something else, too.
"F'course" Rand responded. Rolan blinked surprisedly.
"Well, it isn't always this bad, but yeah." He added. "I really shouldn't skip PE this much, my stamina is bad" he chuckled weakly.
"Has it always been this bad?" Rolan kept going - Rand was definitely being questioned.
He started to get nervous, fidgeting with his hands and pushing himself upright, off of Kian "Yeah… your guys' breathing doesn't get funny all the time?"
Kian and Rolan exchanged a look. "I think you have asthma"
Finally Kian said something. "Honestly, I thought you knew, you have these attacks like weekly. That's not normal"
Rolan shifted his attention to Kian, staring daggers at him "So Ki- you knew this and you still smoke together? Do you know how bad that is for him?" He seemed to be getting genuinely pissed, no longer paying attention to controlling his volume.
Rand was staring out into the distance as the other two fought, desperately trying to tune out the argument. Just focussing on the cold pricking on his skin, and hoping the sounds of the bayou could overpower everything else. He desperately tried to zone it all out, but that became increasingly difficult as it was turning into a yelling match.
"-don't blame me! Rand is the one who doesn't wanna acknowledge it. 'Sides, he gets pissed when I bring it up"
Rand snatched the pack out of Kian's hands, taking a cig out. Everything was too much right now- if he could just get a cig-
Rand tried to light up his smoke, but Rolan snagged the cigarette out of his hand, snapping it in half. "Really? Right fucking now?" He yelled.
"Give me my fucking cigs!" Rand coughed, and then immediately winced at the sharp pain in his chest. "Fuck-"
Everything started to spin around him again, the pressure in his chest getting stronger and stronger, all the thoughts started buzzing in and around and through his head like pins and needles and he needed to get it all out.
He felt himself balled up as small as he could, squirming his body to get this uncomfortable stickiness off and out of him. He could tell what was happening, but it was like he was watching it from behind a screen- unable to do anything. He felt himself pulling on his hair, biting his hand, clawing at his arms, his shallow breaths picking up speed again.
Someone wrapped their arms around his body, tightly hugging him into their chest. He tried frantically to get out of the firm grasp, clawing at now their arms- to escape- to…
What was he doing again?
He- he felt bad, there was this pit in his chest that would tighten when he shifted his attention to it, his breath hitching every time. But instead he focussed on the hug, the pressure grounding him enough to take deep breaths.
Someone took his hands and gently untangled them from his hair, another weight leaning on his head as his hands were draped down.
Rand finally sank in the embrace, tightly hugging the other person back as all previous energy left his body. He now noticed the soreness of his face as tears streamed down onto what he now recognised to be Rolan's shirt. His shoulders were shaking with every sob that tore from his throat.
Kian's voice sounded from above him, his chin leaning on top of his head "It's okay man, you're safe" he felt the warmth of his hand in his. Kian was always warm, and Rand couldn't be more grateful than he was right now.
It was quiet for a few moments. Nothing but the wind rustling through the trees, a few cicadas filling the air with a gentle buzzing.
"Sleep?" Rand whispered, his voice hoarse.
Rolan whispered back, and he could feel the rumble in his chest as he did. "Okay, but we're gonna talk about this tomorrow" he sounded stern, like Rand shouldn't even try to talk himself out of having that conversation.
"Okay." He sighed back.
A few minutes later they were all laying in Rand's bed. Himself in the middle, squished between the two people who he was never going to let go of.
He could feel himself begin to drift off with Rolan's arms around his waist, Kian's arms around the two of them. He could feel Rolan's warm breath in his neck start to slow down.
Rand could barely hear Kian whisper over his heartbeat "Ro, how'd you know what to do?"
"I'm pretty sure our boyfriend is autistic, and pressure usually helps when I'm having a meltdown, so it was worth a try"
"That's bitchin', babe"
Rand heard the covers rustle, peering through his eyes to see Kian dimly lit by just the moon- leaned over kissing Rolan.
"G'night, Ro" Kian whispered through the kiss.
"Goodni-"
"Don't I get a kiss?" Rand sounded from under the covers.
Kian giggled. "You're supposed to be sleeping, starshine"
"M'you keep talk'n" Rand tried his best to sound accusatory, probably failing miserably as he was basically half-asleep.
"Alright, alright, here you go" he could hear the smile as Kian spoke.
He felt his chin get tilted up slightly by a soft hand, and a kiss was pressed to his lips.
"G'night, Rand"