Work Text:
Merlin stared at his phone, idly chewing on a nail. On the screen was a small flame on a red background, the word “tinder” emblazoned across the middle. His finger hovered over the “create account” button.
“Give it to me already,” an exasperated voice said, and the phone was snatched out of Merlin’s hand.
“Will, give that back to me!” Merlin yelped.
“No,” Will said. He held the phone up and out of reach while batting away Merlin’s grabby hands. “You’re going to dawdle for ages if I let you, it’s easier if I just do it for you.”
Pouting, Merlin folded his arms over his chest. “I haven’t decided if I’m going to do it yet.”
“Yes, you have,” Will insisted, jabbing the “create account” button. “Today, you are going to browse through some hot blokes on tinder, pick one, and go get shagged stupid. You’ve been dragging your feet for long enough. It ends now.”
Merlin threw his hands in the air. While waiting for Will to finish, Merlin paced the length of the living room, jerking a hand through his hair. “I don't know if this is even what I want. I’ve never been one for casual hookups, how do I do this?”
Sighing, Will shot Merlin a long-suffering look. “I’m not going to dignify that with a response.” He flipped the phone around and offered it to Merlin, lips set in a self-satisfied grin. “Here, your account is set up. It’s linked to your phone number and email, and it knows you’re looking for blokes. Now all you have to do is add photos and write a bio.”
Merlin gingerly took the phone back, staring as if it were an alien object. “I guess I can do that,” he grumbled. Merlin tapped the plus under “Add photos”, choosing the top three photos that came up. He and Will had spent a full hour scrutinizing every selfie on his phone – this was the easy part.
Over his shoulder, Will nodded approvingly and reached over to tap the little person icon, directing Merlin to fill out his “About Me” section.
Merlin typed the first thing that came to mind, ’I’m no wizard, but we can make some magic between the sheets.’
Will snickered. Before Merlin could regret his horrid attempt to be funny, Will tapped “Done” for him and his profile was complete.
“Finished,” Will declared. “How’s it feel?”
“Like I've lost all control over my dating life.”
Will rolled his eyes. “Don’t be dramatic, mate. You’re still the one that does the swiping. Right if you like them, left if you don’t. Give it a try, all right? After the boyfriends you’ve had, a nice no-strings-attached lay will do you some good.”
“I know, I know,” Merlin sighed. “I heard you the first five times. It’s just going to take some getting used to.”
“No time like the present,” Will said, cheerfully shoving Merlin’s phone in his face.
“What have I got to lose?” Merlin muttered.
Swipe left. Swipe left. Swipe right. Swipe left. Swipe right. Swipe left.
“There you go,” Will encouraged. “Now we wait for the matches.”
“Right…” Merlin said. But true to Will’s word, notifications of “Congratulations! You have a new match!” soon popped up. Despite Merlin’s skepticism, each alert brought with it a little thrill of gratification.
His chats filled up with messages from his matches, variations of “Hi” and various emojis. It was the bare minimum as far as conversation starters went, but Merlin opened each message and diligently replied to them all.
“It’s not terrible,” Merlin begrudgingly admitted. “Lots of options, but low stakes.”
“Exactly.” Will flashed a grin, clapping his hands together. “So, you gonna meet one of these blokes tonight?”
“Who knows? We’ll see how it - “
Merlin’s mouth went dry. His finger hovered over the screen, frozen.
“What?” Will crowded forward, twisting his neck to see what Merlin was looking at.
Merlin swallowed hard. The man on his screen was gorgeous. He was a wet dream come to life, complete with sun-kissed blond hair, sparkling blue eyes, and devastatingly handsome good looks.
‘Arthur, 32’, the caption read.
Will barked a laugh. He crowed, “Oh, this bloke is so your type. I think we’ve got a winner!”
Without tearing his eyes away, Merlin groped for Will’s shoulder and shoved, sending Will teetering to the side.
“Oi!” Will yelped, indignant.
Merlin ignored him. As much as he hated to admit it, Will was right. This Arthur bloke fit Merlin’s type to perfection.
Swipe right.
Ding!
“It’s a Match!” the screen proclaimed cheerfully.
Merlin’s eyes widened, panic bubbling in his chest. Fumbling, he shoved his phone in Will’s face. “Shit, Will, what do I do now?”
Will reared back and squinted at the too-close screen. With a whoop, Will pounded a hand on Merlin’s back. “C’mon, Merlin, you’re not daft! He likes you too, message him and grab drinks or something.” His fingers dug into Merlin’s shoulder in a subtle threat. “Don’t try to pretend, I can tell no one else is going to top this one for you.”
Luckily, Merlin was saved from his panic when his phone dinged again, this time with an incoming chat message. From Arthur.
‘Hi gorgeous :)’
Merlin stared at the message and the little flirtatious smiley face accompanying it. He could do this. Here was a fit, hot bloke who was interested in him, and Merlin wanted to climb him like a tree.
He sent back, ’Hi yourself. I don’t suppose you’re messaging to ask for directions?’
Arthur’s response was quick. ’Cute and funny, I like it. How’s a drink tonight sound?’
Merlin bit back a grin. ’I could do drinks. As long as you bring that delicious arse ;)’
’Oh, that’s a promise. The Rising Sun at 9?’
Merlin tapped out his response, thumb hovering over the send button uncertainly. He bit his lip, gaze flicking over the brief chat exchange. Before his nerves could get the better of him, Merlin jabbed the send button.
’See you there.’
--
Merlin stood in front of The Rising Sun, dawdling outside the door. Nervous, he fingered the phone in his pocket. Was he supposed to send a message? Or should he go in and grab a seat at the bar?
His phone buzzed.
’I’m at the end of the bar if you’re here,’ was Arthur’s message.
Merlin breathed a sigh of relief and pushed the door open, glancing around the crowded pub. It didn’t take him long to spot the bloke he was looking for. Merlin wound his way through the crowd, taking the opportunity to study Arthur’s profile unnoticed. He looked even better in person. Blond, fit, and perfect – just as advertised.
Slipping between two customers, Merlin leaned casually against the bar beside Arthur. “Is this seat taken?”
Arthur jolted, turning wide blue eyes to Merlin. There was a flash of recognition, and his face melted into a charming smirk. “Depends who’s asking,” Arthur said, his gaze hot and deliberate as it dragged down Merlin’s body. “Merlin, I presume?”
Heat flooded Merlin’s cheeks. He swallowed hard and nodded. “Last I checked. And you’re Arthur?”
“The one and only.” Arthur caught the bartender’s eye and lifted a hand to call him over. “Drink?”
“A gin and tonic, thanks,” Merlin said, flashing the bartender a small smile. He sat down next to Arthur and picked up a napkin, folding it into smaller and smaller squares. Hesitant, he lifted his gaze to Arthur’s, a corner of his lips quirking upward uncertainly. “Full disclosure, I don’t do this often. And by that, I mean I’ve never done this whole hookup thing before.”
Arthur covered his surprise with a cough and a quick sip of his drink. “Could’ve fooled me,” he said, studying Merlin with a curious expression. “Why tell me?”
Merlin laughed, raising a hand to rub at the back of his neck. “No idea,” he admitted, “I don’t really know what the rules are, figured I should put that out there before I make an arse of myself.”
“I wouldn’t say there are many rules at all.” Arthur cocked his head to the side, an intrigued look in his eyes as he peered at Merlin over his drink. “But I appreciate it all the same. It’s cute.”
“Yeah?”
The bartender slid over a gin and tonic, and Merlin nodded a brief thanks in his direction. Grateful for something to do with his hands, Merlin grabbed the drink and gulped down a mouthful.
“Yeah,” Arthur said, leaning back in his chair, all cocky arrogance in his stance and the curve of his lips. “But I’m a bit of an old hand at this, so I’ll take care of you.”
Merlin dissolved into laughter. “With lines like that, I can see why.”
“I’ll have you know, my lines are great,” Arthur huffed, crossing his arms across his chest. “If I wanted to charm you, you’d be swooning at my feet now.”
Merlin raised an unimpressed eyebrow, taking a deliberately slow sip of his drink. “I’m not sure how I’m supposed to take that. Is it that you don’t like me enough to charm me or that you don't think I need charming?”
Arthur’s gaze turned heated, eyes flicking up and down Merlin’s body. Merlin had to suppress a shiver when Arthur leaned into his space and put his lips close to Merlin’s ear. “Neither of us came here for a date, Merlin. Charm or not, are you telling me we’re not going to end up in bed together either way?”
Merlin’s eyes fluttered shut, lips parting on a silent exhale. Arthur’s voice was like silk, wrapping around his cock in a teasing caress. When he opened his eyes, Arthur had returned to a more appropriate distance, a self-satisfied smirk on his face.
Merlin’s eyes narrowed. He scanned Arthur’s fit body, eyes lingering on the way his white shirt stretched tight over a well-muscled chest, the gaps between the buttons offering a tantalizing peek at the golden skin beneath.
Merlin tossed back the rest of his drink, wincing at the slight burn down his throat. In one smooth motion, Merlin slid from his seat, grabbed hold of Arthur’s tie, and dragged him in for a hot open-mouthed kiss.
Arthur didn’t respond right away, but Merlin paid it no mind, focused only on the softness of Arthur’s lips against his own. Merlin darted his tongue out to swipe across Arthur’s bottom lip, delighting in the thrill as Arthur’s mouth opened under his with a tiny groan. Arthur tilted his head, mouth hot and demanding as he slotted their lips together at a new angle. Merlin could tell Arthur was used to taking control, but he wasn’t about to give him the satisfaction. He licked into Arthur’s mouth and proceeded to lead Arthur’s tongue in a merry chase in the space between their mouths. With one last flick of his tongue and soft kiss, Merlin pulled away. Arthur stumbled forward and barely caught himself with a hand gripping the edge of his chair, panting as he stared at Merlin with stunned, wide eyes.
Smirking, Merlin laid a palm against Arthur’s chest, straightened Arthur’s tie, and nudged him back into his seat. Merlin drew his fingertips down the front of Arthur’s shirt, touch skimming feather-light across his belly. With an innocent grin on his lips, Merlin leaned back against the bar. “Come back to mine?”
Arthur gave two jerky nods. He threw a few bills down on the counter and grabbed Merlin’s hand, dragging him into the cold night air. “After you.”
Merlin tucked his hands in his pockets and set off down the street, Arthur falling into step beside him. “It’s snowing,” Merlin said, turning his gaze skyward to the grey clouds. “My flat’s not far. We’ll be out of the cold soon.”
Arthur hummed distractedly.
Merlin glanced at Arthur, ducking his head when he found Arthur’s eyes locked on his face. “What?”
“‘I’ve never done this before,’” Arthur quoted. “Tell me, Merlin, how does someone who’s never done this before kiss like that?”
Merlin’s cheeks grew warm. What Arthur thought of him didn’t matter, but there was a pleased flutter in his chest at Arthur’s dumbstruck reaction. “I said I’d never hooked up before,” Merlin corrected. “Not that I’ve never had sex before. I’ll have you know that I’ve had plenty of sex, it just so happens to all have been in committed relationships.”
“Well, I suppose relationships are good for something,” Arthur snorted. Merlin quirked an eyebrow in question, but Arthur continued, “Why tinder then?”
“I needed a change,” Merlin said with a vague wave of his hand. “I take it you do this often?”
“Yeah, I’m not much for commitment these days. This though,” Arthur said, turning a lust-darkened gaze on Merlin, “this I can definitely do.”
Merlin blushed deeper and looked away, a startled laugh escaping his throat. Arthur chuckled – it was a deep and throaty sound that sent a shiver down Merlin’s spine. Before he knew what was happening, Merlin was backed against the side of a building, Arthur’s arms bracketing him on either side. Merlin glanced up in surprise, just in time to lock eyes with Arthur as he leaned in, pausing with his lips a hair's breadth away from Merlin’s.
“You’re a riddle, Merlin,” he murmured. “You kiss like you want to fuck me right there in the pub, but then you blush if I so much as look at you for too long.”
Merlin opened his mouth to protest, but Arthur cut him off with his lips on Merlin’s. The spark between them was electric – Merlin’s resistance crumbled, and he wrapped his arms around Arthur’s neck, pressing closer to deepen the kiss.
By the time they parted, Merlin and Arthur were both panting, and the only thought running through Merlin’s head was how quickly they could get to his flat. He could see the same desire reflected in Arthur’s gaze, so he shoved Arthur off and grabbed his hand, tugging him along down the street at a brisk walk.
“It’s just ahead,” Merlin puffed, lifting the collar of his jacket to protect against the swirl of snowflakes.
They stumbled inside Merlin’s building and into the elevator, all grinning faces and wandering hands. Merlin fumbled with his keys when they reached his door, distracted by Arthur’s lips grazing the back of his neck. It took him three tries to get the key in the lock.
Merlin turned the key, and Arthur’s hand was on the doorknob, pushing the door open and shoving Merlin inside. The door slammed shut, and Arthur backed him against the living room couch, hands spanning Merlin’s hips and eager lips devouring his.
Merlin kissed back with equal enthusiasm, impatient hands tugging at Arthur’s jacket. Arthur let go of Merlin’s hips long enough to free his arms and toss the jacket across the room. His lips never left Merlin’s skin, trailing kisses down Merlin’s neck, stopping only to suck a bruise into the skin above his collarbone. Merlin’s knees went weak. He moaned, hands flying up to clutch at Arthur’s shirt.
“Fuck, you’re hot,” Arthur panted and leaned his forehead against Merlin’s shoulder.
“Look who’s talking,” Merlin gasped. He sagged against the couch, wincing at the way the back dug into his thighs.
Merlin’s fingers skimmed up Arthur’s chest, humming appreciatively at the play of muscles under his fingertips. With a deft tug, Merlin loosened Arthur’s tie and lifted it over his head, dropping it onto the couch cushions behind him. He unbuttoned the top two buttons of Arthur’s shirt, pressing his lips to the new, exposed skin as he worked at the rest of the buttons.
“Couldn’t have worn something a little easier to take off?” Merlin followed his complaint with a flick of his tongue against Arthur’s throat.
Arthur’s breath hitched, and he snorted in amusement. “Wasn’t at the top of my list when I dressed for work this morning.”
Arthur’s hands were everywhere, pushing the jacket off Merlin’s shoulders and pulling the shirt over his head. Next to go was Merlin’s belt, followed by his trousers and pants.
With a triumphant cry, Merlin worked open the last button on Arthur’s shirt, but Arthur dropped to his knees before Merlin could push the shirt off his shoulders. Merlin frowned down at Arthur, displeased until Arthur wrapped his fingers around Merlin’s cock, guiding it between his lips.
“Ngh,” Merlin said, scrabbling for purchase on the back of the couch, his body instinctively curling toward the wet, hot pleasure of Arthur’s mouth.
Arthur seemed to be in no hurry. He grinned up at Merlin, mouthing at the tip of his cock, licking up and down the shaft teasingly until Merlin whined and glared. Holding Merlin’s gaze, Arthur swallowed him down in one fluid motion. Merlin’s legs trembled with the effort of staying upright, a helpless moan torn from his lips.
Arthur’s face was flushed, and his lips were red around Merlin’s cock. To complete the debauched picture, his shirt hung open and askew, revealing the muscular torso beneath. Merlin was mesmerized.
The tip of Merlin’s cock hit the back of Arthur’s throat, and when Arthur hummed, Merlin came with a wail, hips jerking helplessly toward Arthur’s mouth. Amid the roaring in his ears, Merlin dimly registered Arthur licking him clean, the feel of Arthur’s tongue gliding over his too-sensitive cock almost too much to bear.
Merlin pried his fingers loose from the couch and slid to the floor in an uncoordinated heap of limbs. He tipped his head back, watching through half-lidded eyes as Arthur sat back on his heels and licked his lips, an all too smug expression on his face.
After a few steadying breaths, Merlin kicked his trousers off and surged to his feet, dragging Arthur up with him. Arthur’s shirt fluttered to the ground, and Merlin tucked two fingers under the waistband of Arthur’s trousers, tugging him close.
Merlin skimmed fingers over Arthur’s stomach and side, feeling muscles dance under his touch. Merlin gave a mischievous smile and said, “You’re wearing way too many clothes.”
“What are you going to do about it?” Arthur challenged, voice faltering on the last word when Merlin jerked his belt loose.
“Bed,” Merlin ordered, shoving Arthur’s trousers down his legs. He grabbed Arthur by the wrist and backed them across the living room toward the open bedroom door.
They fell into bed in a tangle of limbs. Arthur gasped at the slide of his cock against Merlin’s hip. Breathless, he asked, “Do you live alone?”
“Just me.” Merlin curled a hand around the back of Arthur’s neck and yanked him down to meet his lips. He slipped a hand between them to run a palm down Arthur’s cock.
Arthur threw his head back, hips canting into his touch. Taking advantage of Arthur’s distraction, Merlin flipped them over, gesturing for Arthur to lay back against the pillows. He shot Arthur a wink and scrambled off the bed. Arthur sat up straighter as Merlin reached into his nightstand and pulled out a bottle of lube and a condom. He tossed the condom at Arthur, who ripped it open and rolled it on without missing a beat.
Arthur stared hungrily as Merlin positioned one knee on the bed and reached back to press slicked fingers into his arse. “Well that I can get behind,” Arthur breathed.
Merlin’s world had gone hazy with pleasure, lips parting on tiny gasps as he worked himself open. He reached for his cock with his other hand, but Arthur’s hands were on him, yanking him forward by the arm, sending him sprawling across Arthur’s lap.
“Come here,” Arthur demanded, tugging until Merlin settled with his legs on either side of Arthur’s hips.
Impatient, Arthur nudged Merlin’s legs farther apart. He reached behind Merlin, thumb skimming over Merlin’s hole, groaning at how easily one finger slipped inside. He added another, and Merlin swayed, legs trembling, hands shooting out to grip Arthur’s shoulders for balance.
“Does someone want to be fucked?” Arthur purred, crooking his fingers against Merlin’s prostate.
All Merlin could do was writhe and babble a series of incoherent noises.
Arthur ran a finger up Merlin’s once again hard and leaking cock. “I think that’s exactly what you want,” Arthur answered himself as he took hold of Merlin’s cock and gave it a few loose strokes.
“I think you talk far too much,” Merlin gasped, grinding his hips forward and backward, unable to decide where he wanted Arthur's touch more.
Gathering up the remaining threads of his focus, Merlin pushed both of Arthur’s hands away, shot Arthur a filthy grin, and spread lube over Arthur’s cock before lining up the tip and sinking down.
“Fuck!” Arthur’s hands flew to Merlin’s hips, and his head thumped against the headboard. Arthur’s breaths went from barely controlled, quick pants to outright moans as Merlin began to ride him.
Merlin rolled his hips, meeting Arthur thrust for thrust, crying out when Arthur found the perfect angle. He shuddered, rhythm lost as he hurtled toward the edge. Merlin came with a shout, painting white stripes across Arthur’s chest. Merlin slumped, but Arthur’s grip tightened, his cock pounding into Merlin once, twice before his back arched, and he came with a strangled groan.
Arthur’s hands fell away from Merlin’s hips, and Merlin slid bonelessly to the side, Arthur’s softening cock slipping out of him as he collapsed onto the bed.
“That didn’t seem very fair,” Merlin panted. “I came twice, and you only got to come once.”
Arthur huffed a laugh. “We’ve got time. I’m in no hurry to leave.”
Merlin looked up at Arthur, a twinkle in his eyes. “Well, that’s good, I didn't get a chance to show off all my skills.”
“Oh, that better be a promise,” Arthur growled.
Merlin was laughing as he got up to grab a damp towel from the bathroom to clean them up.
--
True to his word, after a quick doze, Merlin did indeed prove how skilled he was in the bedroom. Arthur had nothing but rave reviews for Merlin’s talents, happy to dismiss any doubts he ever had about Merlin's experience.
As they sank into the pillows for the second time that night, Merlin hesitantly shifted closer and laid his head on Arthur’s chest. In response, Arthur wrapped an arm around Merlin’s shoulders, and Merlin relaxed into his hold.
A blush rose to Merlin’s cheeks, and he covered his face with a hand. He mumbled, “No idea how this is possible, but somehow I’m more shy now than when you had your cock up my arse.”
Arthur snorted. “I think you’ve proven that you’re simultaneously the most and least innocent person I know. A man could get whiplash trying to keep up with you.”
“So is this okay?” Merlin asked, gesturing to their position. “You know, as far as rules go.”
“Yeah, it’s fine,” Arthur said, smiling reassuringly. “Some people like to fuck and leave, others like to unwind a little before heading out the door. Nothing wrong with either, as long as no one overstays their welcome.” As if to prove his point, Arthur tightened his arm around Merlin’s shoulders in a brief squeeze.
“God, I’m hopeless,” Merlin chuckled. “I suppose I should thank you for being a decent bloke. Made my first foray into casual sex a lot less scary than it seemed. But don’t stay on my account, I promise you won’t break my heart if you leave.”
Arthur poked a finger into Merlin’s chest. “You’re not hopeless. Practice makes perfect, right?” Arthur darted a glance at the clock, and added, “I should probably get going soon though. Early morning meeting tomorrow.”
Merlin nodded, smoothing a hand down Arthur’s side before untangling their limbs and propping himself up on one arm. Merlin shot Arthur a tentative, warm smile. "It was good meeting you, Arthur.”
Arthur took his cue, returning the smile with an equally warm one of his own and slipping out of bed. “You too, Merlin.”
Arthur disappeared into the living room to collect his clothes. Merlin sat up, fidgeting with the sheets in his lap, at a loss for how to proceed as he listened to Arthur’s shuffling in the other room. Merlin climbed out of bed and pulled on his pyjamas, padding out to at least walk Arthur to the door. That was normal, right? It seemed like the polite thing to do. By the time Merlin made it into the living room, Arthur was finishing buttoning up his shirt, tie loosely slung around his neck.
Their eyes met, and Arthur flashed Merlin a smile. “If you’re ever looking for a night like that again, you know where to find me.”
Merlin laughed, shaking his head at Arthur’s seemingly never-ending vault of confidence. “I could say the same to you.”
“So you could,” Arthur agreed, shrugging on his jacket and moving towards the door. “Have a good night, Merlin.”
Merlin hurried forward to catch the door as it opened. On impulse, he leaned in and pressed a fleeting kiss to Arthur’s cheek. “Yeah, have a good night, Arthur.”
Merlin dawdled in the doorway, watching as Arthur walked down the hall. Before turning the corner, Arthur shot Merlin a quick smile and a wave over his shoulder.
Merlin waved back, smiling as he shut the door. Letting out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, Merlin flopped onto the couch, tipping his head back against the cushions.
Merlin had never done casual. But if this was what casual hookups were like, maybe he could get used to that. Will had always told Merlin he didn't know how to separate his feelings from his dick, but if Merlin could get through a night of mind-blowing sex with a man like Arthur, Merlin was pretty sure he could handle this.
Between one thought and the next, a knock sounded.
Merlin jumped. It was already past midnight, way past the time for a friendly visit. Wary, Merlin crept to the door and peered through the peephole.
He threw the door open, exclaiming, “Arthur! What are you doing back here?”
There was a faint flush on Arthur’s cheeks, and he shifted from foot to foot. “Remember the snow? It... seems to have turned into a bit of a blizzard since we left the pub. I took a step outside and practically got knocked on my arse.”
Merlin blinked at Arthur, only then registering the thin layer of snow covering Arthur’s clothes and the snowflakes melting in his hair. “Oh. Damn, that’s rough.”
Arthur cleared his throat. “I know this isn’t what either of us was expecting, but any chance I could stay over? I hate to ask, but I don’t really fancy getting lost in the storm and having someone find me as an icicle in the morning.”
Eyes widening in comprehension, Merlin hurried to step aside. “Oh god, of course! I’m an idiot, of course you shouldn’t go back out in that.”
Arthur’s face melted into a grateful smile, and he stepped inside the flat. “Thanks,” he sighed in relief. “You have no idea, but not everyone would’ve agreed to that.”
Merlin wrinkled his nose. “Yeah, can’t say I have trouble believing that. There’re some real arseholes out there.” Merlin padded away, calling over his shoulder, “Let me find you some clothes so you can get out of those snowy ones.”
Merlin returned to find Arthur shaking his jacket and tie over the welcome mat to get rid of the melting snow. He waited for Arthur to drape them over the coat rack before holding out an old t-shirt and pair of soft pyjama pants he’d dug out of the bottom of a drawer. “Sorry, they’re a little old, but this is all I could find that might fit you.”
Arthur shook his head, rubbing a hand over his cold reddened cheeks. “No, don’t apologize. You’re doing me a favor, these will be fine.”
Merlin shot him a small smile. He shuffled a few steps away and made a vague gesture in the direction of the bathroom. “You’re welcome to change in the bathroom if you’d like some privacy?”
Arthur didn’t bother to move, smirking and reaching for the buttons on his shirt. “You’ve seen it all at this point, haven’t you? No point in pretending to be bashful now.”
The awkward tension broke, and Merlin huffed a laugh. “Fair point,” he conceded. “Well, I was going to say you can sleep on the couch, didn't want to make things awkward. But honestly, the bed’s much more comfortable if you’d like to try to get a good night’s sleep.”
Arthur tossed aside his trousers and stepped into Merlin’s pyjama bottoms, eyeing the lumpy couch skeptically. “I think I’ll take you up on that.”
Merlin watched the ripple of muscles under Arthur’s bare skin, remembering the feel of them against his fingertips. As expected, Merlin’s shirt was too small for Arthur, the fabric stretching tight across his chest when he pulled it on. Merlin hummed appreciatively, and Arthur’s gaze snapped to his.
Holding Merlin’s gaze while he bent to retrieve his wet clothes, Arthur drawled, “Like what you see?”
Merlin couldn't help rolling his eyes. “Clearly,” he said dryly. “That’s how we ended up here, remember?”
Seeing no reason to wait for Arthur, Merlin sauntered back toward his bedroom, tipping his head back to call, “You know where the bedroom is when you’re ready.”
Merlin crawled into bed, briefly contemplating closing his eyes to save them both the trouble of making conversation. He dismissed the thought and instead grabbed his phone, turning onto his side to face the door. Pillowing his head on one arm, Merlin scrolled absentmindedly while he waited for Arthur.
When Merlin heard light footsteps approaching, he glanced up to find Arthur in the doorway. He scooted over to make room, pushing the covers back on the left. Arthur climbed in, fluffing the pillow and squirming to find a comfortable position.
“Is this weird?” Merlin asked.
“A little,” Arthur admitted, shifting onto his side to look at Merlin, who had also turned to face him. “But I appreciate it, and I’ll be out of your hair in the morning.”
Merlin shook his head, and the corners of his lips turned up in a smile. “This probably won’t come as a shock, but this is much closer to what I’m used to. And I’d say we’ve gotten on, so no complaints here.”
Arthur returned the smile, propping his head up on a hand. “You said you’d never done casual, and you don’t seem terribly comfortable with it. So why the change?”
Merlin flopped onto his back. He examined the uneven ceiling paint, Arthur’s curious gaze prickling at his skin. “It's kind of a long story, wouldn’t want to bore you.”
“I’ve got time.”
Merlin tipped his head toward Arthur with wide, surprised eyes. “I thought you had an early meeting?”
Arthur shrugged, flicking one finger at Merlin’s arm. “You’re a riddle,” he said, echoing his own words from earlier in the night. “I like riddles.”
Merlin chuckled, amused but with an edge of bitterness. “I’m not all that complicated,” he said to the ceiling. “Like I said before, I’ve never done casual. Since uni, I’ve been in relationship after relationship. I thought that’s what I wanted, that’s what everyone’s supposed to want, right? It always started fine, the blokes I went out with would say all the right things, take me to nice places. Maybe I was naïve to fall for it – fall for them. I don’t do things by halves, so I was all in, but all they wanted me for was a steady lay.”
Merlin didn’t look at Arthur, not wanting to find judgment or pity in his gaze. Thankfully, Arthur didn’t say anything, so Merlin continued.
“I was young, too blind to see I was putting in all the work and getting nothing in return. So I stayed for way too long, always ready with another chance even when they proved they didn’t deserve one. My last relationship ended a couple of months ago – I’d been with him for almost two years. My best mate had been trying to tell me for years that this wasn’t good for me, and I finally realized he was right. After looking back on years of bad choices, I was done with dating. My best mate convinced me to try tinder – no commitment, you know? – so here I am.”
Merlin didn’t know why he’d told Arthur everything, but the story had come spilling out faster than he could stop it. He didn’t need experience to know it wasn’t the kind of thing typically discussed with your one-night stand. But Arthur had asked, and it was out there now. Merlin darted a glance at Arthur, surprised to find a sympathetic, understanding expression on Arthur’s face.
“Yeah, I get it. I mean, the commitment part at least. I dated a lot in uni and afterward, but… well… I’m not really a good boyfriend,” Arthur said with a rueful twist of his lips. “I always ended things when they started to get serious. For a while, I thought it was something to get over, that if I just pushed through the doubt, I would come out the other side, and there would be my happily ever after. It didn’t work obviously, all I did was lead people on.”
Arthur slapped a hand over his face and groaned, “God, I sound like one of your exes, don’t I?”
Merlin hummed, patting Arthur’s arm until he peeked through his fingers. “You do, and you don’t,” Merlin said. “Don’t get me wrong, you were probably a real arse to some of your exes –”
Arthur winced, flopping back into the pillows.
“– but you sound like you have a hell of a lot more remorse for what you did than all of my exes put together. And, well… speaking from experience, it takes two to stay in a relationship,” Merlin finished with a shrug.
Arthur squinted at Merlin. “Thanks, I think? All that might be true, but I insist I’m still more at fault for the situation.”
Merlin didn’t miss a beat. “Oh, you are. You definitely are.”
Arthur made a face. “I take back my ‘thanks’.”
A cheeky smile was Merlin’s only response.
Arthur rolled his eyes and said, “Anyways. My point was that I don’t do relationships anymore. These days, tinder is brilliant. My bio tells you I don’t want anything resembling a relationship, and I take it from there."
“I’m beginning to get that,” Merlin said with a laugh. “Don't get a big head about it, but you’ve been a pretty good introduction to the world of casual sex. I could probably get used to this.”
Arthur looked smug, puffing up his chest and waggling his eyebrows. “I’ll gladly take the credit for that. Although I should probably warn you, I’m as good as it gets, might not want to apply this standard to all your future hookups. You’ll be sorely disappointed.”
“You’re such a pillock!” Merlin snorted. Grabbing the corner of his pillow, Merlin yanked it out from under his head and smacked Arthur in the face with it. “Were you born this conceited, or do you have to work at it?”
Arthur sputtered, batting away Merlin’s attacks. “Oi! I’ll have you know that I am a very well-liked individual!”
“Sure, you are.” Merlin withdrew the pillow, fluffing it as he rolled his eyes. “You’re lucky you’re pretty.”
Arthur preened. “Well, I won’t deny that.”
Merlin whacked him with the pillow again. He sniffed, “Seriously, mate, there must be some reason you’re such an arrogant prat. What do you do anyways?”
It was Arthur’s turn to stare at the ceiling. Haltingly, he said, “I’m the CEO of Pendragon Industries.”
Merlin froze mid-fluff. Slowly, he raised his head to look at Arthur in shock. “Holy shit, you’re Arthur Pendragon?”
Arthur smiled weakly. “That’s me.”
“Are you for real? Like you’re the one who owns the huge building in the middle of the city? With the giant dragon logo?” Merlin gaped.
“Not lying to you, mate,” Arthur said, frowning. “What’s it to you?”
“Oh, sorry,” Merlin said sheepishly, plopping his pillow down and lying back upon it. “It’s just I’ve got a good friend who’s been trying to find an inroad at Pendragon Industries for years now, and here I am in bed with you.”
“I see.”
Merlin’s eyes widened, and he scrambled to add, “Oh, no, that’s not what I meant! I wasn’t going to ask you to get him in or anything. He’s doing great, found a brilliant job elsewhere actually. And besides, you and I just met, who am I to ask for favors?”
Arthur’s eyes roved over Merlin’s face, studying him intently. Curious, Merlin cocked his head in an unspoken question. Arthur’s shoulders relaxed, and his lips curved into a tiny smile. “Thanks, I think. So what about you? You clearly know plenty about me now that you know my last name. What’s your deal?”
Merlin’s fingers drummed on the bedcovers. He pursed his lips and said, “I doubt I know very much about you at all honestly. I know what the public knows about you, but I’ve gotta imagine there’s more to Arthur Pendragon.”
Arthur went still, staring as if he couldn’t believe Merlin’s words. “Right,” Arthur said faintly.
“But to answer your question, I’m a writer,” Merlin said, grinning. “I’ve had a couple of books published. I do decently well for myself. The dream is to have a bestseller one day.”
Arthur’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, but his eyes were earnest and warm. “Here’s hoping. I’ll be sure to look out for your work.”
Merlin blushed and quickly changed the subject, never one to boast about his accomplishments. “So nothing serious, huh?” Merlin asked. “How long have you been at the whole hookup deal to be such an ‘old hand at it,’ as you would say?”
Arthur rubbed his chin, scratching absently at his stubble. “Around two or three years? I haven’t kept track, but it’s been a while now. I go on tinder when I want some fun, or don’t open the app if I don’t. It’s nice and easy. To not be beholden to anyone.”
Merlin nodded in understanding. “There’s something freeing about it, knowing all you’re agreeing to is one night. I used to love the commitment, the security of having someone to come home to. But it doesn’t mean much when you’re the only one trying to make it a home.”
“Everyone has their reasons for wanting no strings attached.”
“You can say that again. After our conversation, seems like you’re the last person I need to say this to, but I am one thousand percent not looking for anything serious,” Merlin said, knocking his arm against Arthur’s playfully.
Arthur huffed a laugh. “And I am one thousand percent not looking for anything more than some hot sex.”
Merlin shot Arthur an exaggerated wink and dissolved into laughter. “Perfect. This has been nice though. You’re an easy bloke to talk to, Arthur.”
Arthur inclined his head at Merlin. “Likewise. Of my many one-night stands, never has one turned out quite like this. I mean that in a good way.”
“What can I say, I like to be the exception to the rule.” Merlin smirked.
Arthur snorted. “Don’t get too full of yourself now. Half my hookups get the wrong idea and try to overstay their welcome. The other half ends up somewhere between a pretty good lay or truly terrible at it. You’ve not got much competition.”
“And yet you still haven’t given up on hooking up in general?” Merlin raised an eyebrow. “I have to say that doesn’t paint a rosy picture.”
“It’s better than the alternative,” Arthur admitted with a shrug, rolling onto his back and pillowing his head on one arm.
“The alternative?”
Arthur stilled, grimacing as if he hadn’t meant to say that.
“You don’t have to talk about it,” Merlin said gently, sensing Arthur’s reluctance.
Arthur let out a breath slowly, giving Merlin a small, half-smile. “It’s like you said, you’re easy to talk to. I find myself saying things without meaning to.”
Merlin suppressed a pleased smile, opting to offer Arthur a sympathetic look. “I still stand by what I said. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, no matter what you might’ve blurted out.”
“The alternative is what my father wants,” Arthur said, shooting Merlin a grateful look, but choosing to plow forward anyway. “He doesn’t approve of my lifestyle – calls it ‘whoring around’. Discretion is paramount to him, and what he wants more than anything is for me to marry someone advantageous. According to him, I should be using my marriage to cement or secure business ties.”
Merlin opened his mouth and closed it again. He turned Arthur’s words over in his mind. “That all sounds a bit… old-fashioned.”
Arthur chuckled humorlessly and elbowed Merlin in the arm. “That’s putting it lightly. I refuse to, and he’s not pleased. I’ve told him a million times that when I marry, it will be for love. Something you’d think he would understand since he did the same, against advisement.”
“That’s romantic,” Merlin said softly, nudging Arthur’s arm back in a gesture of comfort.
Face flushing, Arthur didn’t tear his gaze from the ceiling. “I suppose. It hasn’t worked out for me so far. Probably not what you expected out of someone like me.”
Arthur tried to flash a winning smile, but this time, Merlin saw the cracks in the façade. There was a tightening around Arthur’s eyes, a minute quaver to his upper lip as it stretched tight over his teeth.
“You’re rather sweet, you know,” Merlin said, a twinkle in his eye.
“Sweet?” Arthur asked incredulously.
“Sweet,” Merlin confirmed. “You’re not as arrogant a prat as I thought. Well… not entirely anyway.”
Arthur sputtered. “Excuse you! I’d be a lot more inclined to listen to you if you didn’t enjoy insulting me so much.”
Merlin stifled a laugh, taking pity on Arthur. “I’m just saying, you’re this billionaire playboy, claiming to have done nothing but sleep around for years. But you’re looking for love too. You pretend otherwise, but you have a heart.” Merlin jabbed at Arthur’s chest with a finger as if to prove his point.
Arthur batted Merlin’s hand away and huffed, the upward curve of his lips belying his annoyance. “So what? I’m still not looking for any sort of commitment. In fact, I’m fairly sure that even if true love slapped me in the face, I wouldn’t be able to recognize it.”
“I’m likely not much better,” Merlin conceded, settling with his head resting on Arthur’s shoulder. “But hey, what’ll be, will be, right? It’ll happen or it won’t, no point trying to speed it up. Think I’ve learned my lesson there.”
“I’d drink to that if I had a beer,” Arthur agreed, miming raising an invisible glass in the air.
Merlin didn’t know what it was about Arthur that made the conversation flow so easily between them. He’d just met the man, but they chattered on about the most inane things. It had been years since Merlin had talked with someone long into the night. Their voices filled the room with quiet murmuring and the occasional bout of laughter, a pleasant feeling of warmth blanketing them. When Merlin’s eyelids began to grow heavy, a yawn interrupting his retort to Arthur’s latest ridiculous comment, he peered at the clock on his nightstand.
Half-lidded eyes shooting open, Merlin cursed. “Shit, Arthur, it’s 2 a.m., why are we still awake?”
Arthur propped himself up on an elbow and craned his neck to glance at the clock. “Shit, you’re right,” he groaned, collapsing back down. “No wonder I’m so tired.”
“Yeah, I can barely stay awake,” Merlin yawned. He patted Arthur’s arm before burrowing into the bed and closing his eyes. “Good talk, mate, but I’m knackered. Good night?”
“Mmm,” Arthur hummed sleepily, his eyes already closed. “Good night,” he mumbled back.
--
Merlin awoke to the feeling of an arm heavy around his waist and warm breath puffing against his neck. He glanced behind him, face melting into a soft smile as he took in Arthur’s sleeping face. All at once, the events of the previous night came flooding back. It had been an unexpected but pleasant night, and Merlin hadn’t woken next to someone in months. It was a nice change.
Merlin squinted at the clock on his nightstand, wondering how long he’d slept after such a late night.
The display read 10 a.m.
Flinging Arthur’s arm off, Merlin shot upright. With a muffled groan, Arthur curled in on himself.
“Arthur!” Merlin shook Arthur’s shoulder roughly.
“What?” Arthur mumbled into the sheets.
“Arthur, didn't you say you had an early morning meeting today? It’s ten o’clock!” Merlin cried.
Merlin was about to shake Arthur again, thinking he was being ignored. Mid-snuffle, Arthur’s back went rigid, and he bolted upright.
“Shit! I’ve completely missed my meeting!” Arthur scrambled out of bed, getting tangled in the blankets and hopping halfway across the room before darting off.
Merlin blinked at the empty doorway, Arthur’s shuffling and cursing from the living room the only indication he was still there. His fingers drifted to the other side of the bed, the warm sheets an odd comfort he attributed to the familiarity of sharing a bed. Shaking himself, Merlin ventured into the living room.
Arthur had already finished dressing, and he shot Merlin a brief smile as he buttoned his jacket and stuffed his feet into his shoes. “Thanks for letting me stay over, I’ll see you around, Merlin!” Arthur called, a whirlwind as he rushed away.
“See you around, Arthur,” Merlin murmured, chuckling as he shut the door.
--
Over the next few days, Merlin tried to put Arthur out of his mind. He accepted one bloke’s offer of a hookup one night, but as Arthur promised, it really wasn’t as exciting as his time with Arthur had been – even if Merlin was loath to admit it.
Merlin fully expected to never see Arthur again, but five days after their night together, his phone chimed with a tinder message from none other than Arthur Pendragon.
’Any chance you found a red silk necktie in your flat?’
Merlin frowned at his screen, wondering if perhaps Arthur had messaged him by mistake. But Merlin thought back to the night they’d met and remembered the brilliant red tie around his neck.
Figuring he would’ve noticed by now if something that brightly colored was laying around his living room, Merlin almost responded with a “no” without checking. But an image of Arthur hanging up his wet clothes after coming in from the snow floated before his eyes. Merlin thumbed through the jackets slung over his coat rack and jumped when something red fluttered to the ground.
Merlin snapped a picture and sent it to Arthur.
’This look familiar?’
’That's the one. Been looking for it for days, mind if I stop by and pick it up?’
’Be my guest, I’ll be here all day.’
Merlin exchanged a few more messages with Arthur, working out details of when Arthur would be stopping by, going as far as to exchange phone numbers to make it easier to get in touch with each other.
By the time Arthur showed up at Merlin’s flat, the sky had long gone dark, and Merlin was impatiently waiting for Arthur to arrive so he could head out for dinner.
When Arthur stepped through the door, it was with a sheepish look on his face. “Hi,” he offered, hands shoved into his pockets.
“Hi,” Merlin replied with a small smile. Clearing his throat, he grabbed the tie still slung over the coat rack. “Here’s what you came for.”
Arthur’s fingers brushed against Merlin’s as he accepted the tie, a lopsided smile on his face. “Thanks. Sorry to be a bother, you probably had other plans tonight.”
Merlin debated lying and telling Arthur that yes, he did have plans, but in the end, decided to go with the truth. “Honestly, I really was here all day. The only thing you kept me waiting on was my dinner, which I was going to head out for once you left here.”
Surprise flickered through Arthur’s eyes. Smirking, he said, “No hot dates?”
“Not today.” Merlin rolled his eyes, leaning back against the couch and jerking his chin toward the door. “Just an Indian takeaway place around the corner with a buy one, get one free offer expiring today.”
It was Merlin’s turn to be surprised when Arthur’s eyes lit up. “Oh, I know that place,” Arthur said. “It’s quite good, I’ve been a few times.”
Merlin cocked his head to the side. "Didn't know you spent much time in this neighborhood. You wouldn’t happen to want to go with me, would you?”
Silence.
Merlin fought the urge to slap a hand over his mouth. Arthur looked thoughtful, but the silence stretched on for long enough Merlin started to regret blurting out his offer. He forced a laugh, the sound unconvincing to his own ears. “Oh, but you probably have your own dinner plans, forget I said anything. You’re here for your tie, so I’ll just say good night, and see you around,” he babbled, ushering Arthur toward the open door.
Arthur stumbled, steadying himself with a hand on the door frame. “No, no, I’d love to go. I was planning to head back to the office after stopping by here, so I was thinking about if I could get away with leaving my work for the morning.”
Merlin paused, a tentative smile spreading across his face. “And can you?”
Arthur winked. “There are perks to being CEO. Let’s go, I'm starving.”
--
Arthur enjoyed his dinner with Merlin more than he expected. He was pleasantly surprised to find that even without sex involved, their conversation never ran dry. After the check was paid – Arthur insisted on paying to make up for inconveniencing Merlin – he fell into step beside Merlin to walk back to his flat.
“For a posh prat, you’ve got surprisingly good taste,” Merlin said as they strolled down the street in the dim moonlight.
A choked-off squawk escaped Arthur’s mouth. “Who said I was posh? And why in the world would that mean I don't have good taste?”
Merlin barely suppressed a grin. “Come on, it's painfully obvious how posh you are. You have to admit that people who are as rich as you don’t typically frequent tiny Indian restaurants that can barely fill their tables. Or is this your way of staying in touch with the common people?”
“Excuse you,” Arthur sniffed. “I’ll have you know that I lived around the corner for a couple of years right out of uni. Sure, it was a rebellious phase, but I still learned valuable life lessons.”
Merlin looked genuinely taken aback. “That’s... not what I was expecting you to say. Is that why you suggested The Rising Sun the other night?”
Arthur shoved his hands in his pockets, his shoulders lifting in a half-shrug. “Yeah, I like to come back here once in a while, reminds me of a simpler time in my life. Course, I didn’t expect you to live right down the street.”
“Maybe I really will see you around then,” Merlin said, bumping his shoulder against Arthur’s playfully.
A corner of Arthur’s mouth quirked upward. “Maybe you will.”
They slowed their pace when Merlin’s building came into view. Merlin gestured at the door and said, “Fancy coming up for a cuppa?”
Arthur glanced between the door and Merlin, torn between enjoying Merlin’s company and not overstaying his welcome. Merlin’s smiling face won out. “Could be nice. It’s been chilly since that snowstorm, I wouldn’t mind getting warm.”
Arthur hadn’t meant any innuendo in his words, but his breath caught in his throat when Merlin’s eyes darkened upon mention of the snowstorm. His cock gave an interested twitch as he watched Merlin fiddle with his keys to get them inside.
For the fourth time in less than a week, Arthur stepped into Merlin’s flat. It was a little odd – he had never spent this much time with a hookup before, especially not when the vast majority of the time was decidedly not sexual.
“Make yourself comfortable,” Merlin called, tossing his jacket over the coat rack and disappearing into the kitchen to put the kettle on.
Arthur glanced around, taking in the cluttered living room he hadn’t paid any proper attention to before. He pulled off his jacket and hung it on the coat rack, rearranging Merlin’s carelessly slung jacket that hung precariously off the hooks as he did so.
As Merlin requested, Arthur made himself comfortable. He wandered around the room examining the picture frames scattered about. When he’d made a full circuit, he plopped down on the couch to wait for Merlin. Squirming, Arthur tried to find a comfortable, non-lumpy spot to sit on. He tried one side of the couch, then the other. Eventually, he settled for perching on the edge just to the left of the middle.
Merlin reappeared, two steaming cups of tea in hand. He picked his way across the living room and set the cups on the coffee table.
Arthur wrapped his hands around his cup, giving a happy sigh as the warmth seeped into his bones. “You weren't kidding about how uncomfortable this couch was.”
Merlin picked up his cup of tea and tried to slouch into the couch cushions. He shifted this way and that before giving up, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. “It’s had better days,” Merlin admitted, rolling his shoulders. “I’m planning on getting a new one, it just hasn't been at the top of my list.”
Interest piqued, Arthur asked, “Writing not going well?”
Arthur had looked Merlin up after meeting him and was surprised to find Merlin had published quite a few books. They were all well-reviewed by critics, contrary to the offhanded way Merlin had spoken of his accomplishments.
Merlin shook his head. “It’s not that, I’m not hurting for money. I’m actually working through the final drafts of a book that will be published in the next few months. Call it a holdover from an earlier time, I suppose. I didn’t grow up with much, it was just me and my mum. Things are good now, but old habits die hard. Besides, I spend so much time writing it’s not as if this couch gets much use. You should see my office, it gets all the love and attention.”
“I’d love to,” Arthur said, lifting his tea for a sip.
Wide blue eyes met Arthur’s. Merlin’s face flushed a light pink, and he dropped his gaze back to the tea in his lap. “Sure,” Merlin murmured, lips curling into a faint smile. “I’ll show you once we’ve finished.”
Arthur hid a smile in his cup.
There was something about Merlin that was so warm and inviting, something that made Arthur want to keep talking to him and keep listening to him, even if it was mindless prattle about how Merlin picked his printer paper. So Arthur listened, soaking in the sound of Merlin’s voice and the sparkle in Merlin’s eyes.
When Arthur raised his cup to his lips again and only a few drops of liquid spilled out, he looked down in surprise, having barely noticed his tea had run dry.
Arthur watched as Merlin tipped his own cup back, draining the last of his tea before flopping back against the cushions. Not giving Merlin a chance to settle, Arthur dragged him to his feet and said cheerily, “I believe I was promised a tour.”
Merlin rolled his eyes but obliged. He tucked his arm through Arthur’s and led him to the closed door beside Merlin's bedroom. He flung open the door with a flourish. “Here we are,” Merlin announced. “Not sure why you wanted to see this so much, I'm sure it's nothing compared to what you’re used to.”
“Just wanted to see where the magic is made,” Arthur teased, taking a few steps into the spacious office.
Merlin wasn’t kidding, his office was beautiful. The walls were lined with shelves full of books, everything from the classics to how-to manuals. A cozy armchair sat in the corner, a knitted blanket draped over the back, a stack of papers teetering on the seat. The center of the entire room was a lovely dark mahogany desk. Arthur smoothed a hand over the top, fingers skittering over a laptop and scribbled notes.
“It’s beautiful,” Arthur murmured. “I can tell where you get your inspiration from. I’m sure Camelot is a labor of love.”
A startled noise came from Merlin. “How did you know my books are about Camelot?”
Heat rushed to Arthur’s cheeks. He deliberately avoided facing Merlin when he said, “Er... I may have looked you up after you mentioned you’re a writer.”
Merlin’s face appeared in Arthur’s periphery, a soft look in his eyes. “That’s incredibly sweet,” Merlin whispered, gentle fingers brushing against Arthur’s atop the scattered papers.
Arthur raised his eyes to Merlin’s, powerless to resist the near magnetic pull between them when Merlin’s tongue darted out to wet his lips.
“Do you want to stay over?” Merlin asked hoarsely.
Arthur surged forward to capture Merlin’s lips, hauling him close. “Yes,” Arthur gasped against Merlin’s mouth.
A moan spilled from Merlin’s lips, and he stumbled backward, thighs hitting the edge of his desk. Arthur was lost in the feeling of Merlin’s mouth, the feeling of Merlin’s fingers in his hair. His hands slid up Merlin’s sides, fingers grazing bare skin as he lifted Merlin’s shirt out of the way. Peppering kisses down Merlin’s neck, Arthur paused above his collarbone to suck a bruise into the skin. Arthur scrabbled around on the desk behind Merlin, shoving papers out of their way.
“This wasn't exactly what I had planned for tonight,” Merlin gasped as Arthur lifted him onto the desk.
“Me neither, but I'm certainly not complaining,” Arthur said, slipping between Merlin's legs and unbuckling Merlin’s belt.
“Nope, no complaints,” Merlin muttered. His fingers made quick work of the buttons on Arthur’s shirt and trousers, and Arthur was all too happy to oblige when Merlin pushed the fabric away.
Impatient, Arthur shoved Merlin’s trousers down, tugging them down his legs when Merlin raised his hips off the desk. Off went Merlin’s shirt over his head, and Arthur crowded back into his space, running his fingers through ruffled hair and kissing away the smirk on Merlin’s face.
“Have you ever done this before?” Arthur asked. He wrapped a hand around Merlin’s cock and stroked, slow and languid, up and down his length.
Merlin’s head fell back, and his hips stuttered forward. “Done what?” he gasped, propping himself up with a hand on the desk behind him.
Arthur opened his mouth to answer, but Merlin distracted him with an ankle hooked around his leg, nudging him close enough for Merlin to take Arthur's straining cock in hand. Breath hitching on a moan, Arthur thrust into Merlin’s touch. His focus narrowed to the rough strokes of Merlin’s hand, and his own hand fell limply away from Merlin’s cock.
“Sex in your office,” Arthur croaked.
“Not like this.”
Arthur’s eyes snapped open, reading the mirth in Merlin’s voice. Merlin was far too coherent if he had time to be cheeky. Arthur leaned in close, his breath ghosting over Merlin’s ear as he growled, “Let’s change that then.”
Arthur followed up with a nip at Merlin’s earlobe, making Merlin shiver. “Please,” Merlin moaned, his hand flexing around Arthur’s cock.
Arthur tried valiantly to cling to the remaining threads of his self-control. He batted Merlin’s hand away and ran a finger up his length, smearing precum over the head. “Condom? Lube?” Arthur groaned.
Merlin’s hips bucked, and his hands came up to grip Arthur’s shoulders, pulling him close and shoving him away at the same time. “Bedroom. Let me up.”
Reluctantly, Arthur pulled away. “Fine, but I’m still fucking you on the desk.”
Merlin shivered, his eyes darkening with lust. “Yeah, I want that,” he whispered before darting out of the room.
When Merlin returned, Arthur was reclined against the desk, fingers loosely wrapped around his cock, stroking lazily.
“Keeping yourself busy?” Merlin said with a smirk.
Arthur raised an eyebrow, his hand not pausing in his ministrations. “You have a problem with that?”
As Arthur made to step away from the desk, Merlin shook his head and pushed him back against it. Merlin didn’t answer Arthur's questioning gaze, instead dropped to his knees and replaced Arthur's hand with his mouth.
“Fuck,” Arthur gasped, his fingers burying themselves in Merlin’s hair. His breathing went ragged – Arthur wanted nothing more than to pin Merlin down and fuck him through the floor.
Merlin grinned around the cock in his mouth, glancing up at Arthur through his lashes. He hummed in satisfaction, eyes twinkling with mischief as if he knew exactly what Arthur was thinking. Teasing, Merlin pulled away only to flick his tongue in tiny licks around the head of Arthur’s cock.
Arthur was not a patient man. He tugged at Merlin’s hair to maneuver him where he wanted. Arthur wanted to fuck Merlin’s mouth with abandon, but he was careful to ease up if Merlin started to sputter, never pushing if Merlin resisted. But Merlin’s mouth was wet, hot perfection, and Arthur threw his head back, panting Merlin’s name.
Merlin pulled away, wiping his mouth with a hand. He rose to his feet and crowded into Arthur’s space. Their cocks slid together, and Arthur whimpered, “Why did you stop?”
Merlin gave a throaty chuckle. His voice was low and husky when he murmured, “Thought you wanted to fuck me on my desk.”
Arthur blinked, in a daze as Merlin nudged him away from the desk and hopped up on it himself. Merlin spread his legs invitingly, nodding at the condoms and lube now sitting beside him.
A grin split Arthur’s face. “You little tease, you almost made me forget,” he groaned, flipping open the top of the lube and wetting his fingers.
“I’ll take that as a compliment.” Merlin flashed a smirk, moving to lay flat on his back.
Arthur hauled Merlin forward by the hips, wrapping Merlin’s legs around his waist as he pressed lubed fingers to Merlin’s arse. He prepared Merlin with light, teasing touches, and the slow slide of one, then two fingers inside him. Merlin arched his back, mouth falling open on a filthy moan. By the time Arthur was satisfied, Merlin was babbling nonsense, begging Arthur to ’fuck me already, before I find somebody who will’.
Arthur ignored him, his only response another slow slide of fingers that had Merlin writhing. He rolled the condom on and pressed inside. Merlin’s sigh of relief turned into moans of pleasure as Arthur moved inside him. Arthur knew he found Merlin’s prostate when Merlin’s body jerked beneath him, and he shouted Arthur’s name. Merlin’s hands scrabbled at Arthur’s back, heels digging into Arthur’s thighs, urging him faster, harder. Arthur was only too happy to oblige, angling his thrusts to continue wringing those desperate moans out of Merlin.
“God, Merlin, I’m not going to last,” Arthur panted. He tipped over the edge with a strangled cry, and it was all he could do to hold himself up and avoid crushing Merlin. When Merlin whined under him, Arthur reached between them to take hold of his cock. It was clear Merlin was close too – it only took a few rough strokes before he stiffened and came, Arthur’s name on his lips.
Merlin went limp, his legs falling away from Arthur’s waist, knocking Arthur off balance. Arthur’s arms gave out, and he collapsed onto Merlin’s chest with a small “oof”. Merlin didn’t push him off, so Arthur stayed where he was, listening to Merlin’s heartbeat.
When Arthur peeled away, Merlin looked down between them at the mess of come on their skin and wrinkled his nose. “I think a shower may be in order,” he announced, sliding off the desk.
“I concur,” Arthur said.
“Join me?” Merlin suggested, shooting Arthur a wink.
Arthur laughed. “Does your stamina know no bounds?”
“Oh god, no,” Merlin chuckled, shaking his head. “I'm knackered, don't think I could get it up again tonight. But you’re still gorgeous, we’re both filthy, and a hot shower seems like the answer to all our problems.”
“Don’t mind if I do then,” Arthur said, wrapping an arm around Merlin’s waist and steering them both toward the bathroom. As they stepped out of the office, Arthur leaned in to whisper in Merlin’s ear, “I wouldn’t say no to a repeat performance in the morning though.”
Merlin gave a shaky moan, and his step faltered. “I’ll hold you to that.”
Despite Merlin and Arthur’s tiredness, they mustered up the energy for a few wet make-out sessions while in the shower. Once they were both clean and dry, they stumbled into Merlin’s bedroom together and fell into bed.
“No early morning meetings this time?” Merlin asked, accepting Arthur's embrace when his arm was offered, moving to rest his head on Arthur’s shoulder.
“Not this time,” Arthur said, pulling Merlin close and letting his eyes drift shut.
“See you in the morning then, Arthur,” Merlin slurred.
“See you in the morning, Merlin,” Arthur echoed before slipping into the comfort of sleep.
--
When morning came, Arthur was happy to make good on his offer of a repeat performance. While lying beside each other, trying to catch their breath from an enthusiastic start to the day, Merlin mused, “I can see why you do the whole hookup thing so often.”
Arthur snorted, propping himself up on one elbow and raising an eyebrow. “I think you have to have hooked up with more than one person before you can say that.”
“Who says I haven’t?” Merlin retorted.
Arthur’s head snapped around. “You certainly didn't waste any time,” he said, slowly lowering himself back down onto the bed. It hadn’t even been a week since he’d first spent the night with Merlin.
Merlin’s face turned sheepish, as if he hadn’t meant to blurt out that information. “It was one bloke, two nights ago,” Merlin admitted. “I suppose I wanted to see what else tinder had to offer, test out your theory of how ‘you’re as good as it gets’.”
“You don't have to explain yourself to me, Merlin,” Arthur said softly. And he meant it – Merlin didn’t owe him any explanation. If Arthur felt relieved Merlin hadn’t been sleeping his way across London, it was only because Merlin was a nice bloke, and Arthur thought he deserved better.
“I know that,” Merlin murmured.
Merlin shifted to lay his head on Arthur’s shoulder, and Arthur glanced down to find Merlin smiling up at him, clear blue eyes so close it was hard to focus on anything else. A flush crept up his neck, and Arthur coughed to hide his reaction.
Clinging to a safe and comfortable routine, Arthur shot Merlin a cocky smile. “So am I?”
“Are you what?”
“As good as it gets.”
Merlin huffed an exasperated sigh and rolled away. “Arrogance is unbecoming,” Merlin mock scolded. “But if you must know, no, he wasn't the best sex I’ve ever had.”
A triumphant grin spread across Arthur’s face. “Does that mean I was?”
Merlin smacked Arthur’s arm. “You can't let it go, can you?”
“I’m just saying, there’s probably a reason you slept with me again,” Arthur said smugly.
Merlin raised a challenging eyebrow at Arthur. “I could say the same to you.”
“That’s not what we’re talking about,” Arthur sniffed. He elected to roll out of bed before Merlin came up with another retort. Merlin’s quiet laughter was the only response Arthur received as he shuffled around the room to search for his discarded clothes. There was a rustling of bedcovers, followed by Merlin breezing past Arthur.
Merlin reached into his dresser to pull out a pair of sweatpants. As he shook them out, he said, “I’m going to make myself some breakfast. Anything I can get for you?”
Arthur shook his head, speaking more to Merlin’s bare legs than his face until Merlin pulled the sweatpants on. “No, thanks, I should head into the office. Do some of that work I put off last night.”
“I can confirm you did quite a bit of work last night,” Merlin said, smirking suggestively.
Arthur groaned and aimed a smack at Merlin’s arm. Merlin snickered, dodging Arthur’s arm and disappearing into the living room.
A smile lingered on Arthur’s face as he finished collecting his things. On his way out the door, Arthur noticed his phone charger lying discarded beside the couch, hidden in the shadow of the wall. Dithering, Arthur glanced toward Merlin puttering around in the kitchen, and glanced back at the charger. Confident Merlin’s attention was occupied, Arthur retrieved only his jacket from the coat rack and pulled the door open.
“Bye, Merlin,” Arthur called, raising a hand in a wave. “Enjoy your breakfast.”
Merlin wiped his hands on the kitchen towel and hurried over to give Arthur a one-armed hug. “Bye, Arthur,” Merlin said, cheerily waving Arthur out the door.
--
A couple of days later, Arthur’s phone buzzed with a text from Merlin.
’Is this yours?’ The text was accompanied by a picture of an iPhone charger lying on a wooden surface.
’How are you so sure it’s mine?’ Arthur tapped back.
’Had that posh look about it.’ Another message quickly followed. ’Besides, how many blokes do you think have stayed long enough to leave a phone charger in the last three days?’
He would deny it, but Arthur’s lips curled into a pleased smile.
’Yeah, it’s mine. I’ll swing by after work on Friday?’ Arthur texted back.
’Wouldn’t complain if you brought food too,’ was Merlin’s cheeky response.
’Deal.’
--
Arthur showed up at Merlin’s door, a bag of takeaway in hand. They’d only seen each other twice, but it had been shockingly easy to fall into a comfortable pattern. They spent the night bantering, as they had every other time they met. It was like their own brand of foreplay – exhilaration mixed with arousal that never failed to land them in bed as the hour grew later.
Arthur didn’t know why they kept doing it, why he kept “forgetting” items and coming back to get them from Merlin, and why Merlin didn’t comment on it. Soon, it practically became a weekly ritual for them. Arthur would “forget” something of his, then either Arthur would text Merlin to ask if he’d found it, or Merlin would text Arthur to ask if the new object he’d found was his.
The logical thing to do would be for Arthur to drop by for five minutes, pick up the latest forgotten token, and be on his way. But each time, that was never how it went.
Arthur and Merlin inexplicably gravitated toward each other, never tiring of the other even while they were still sleeping with other people. They never talked about it, not explicitly. Arthur looked forward to nights spent with Merlin, but he hadn’t stopped going on the pull.
And Arthur knew without being told Merlin hadn’t either.
Sometimes it was obvious, like the time when Merlin had blushed and asked if Arthur had a condom. Merlin admitted he was out when Arthur knew they hadn’t used the last one the previous time they were together. Other times it was subtle, Merlin pushing off their night together by a day or two, bumbling through a half-hearted excuse where Arthur could read between the lines that Merlin had other plans.
Three months into their unspoken arrangement, the morning after a particularly memorable night – in which they spent several hours debating the mechanics of unicorn magic that devolved into a rather ridiculous shouting match where the winner was decided by who could make the other come faster – Arthur woke to the corner of the duvet hitting him in the face.
“Merlin!” Arthur grunted, pawing the duvet away and squinting at the other side of the bed.
“Sorry, sorry,” Merlin mumbled, sounding not at all sorry.
“What time is it?” Arthur yanked the duvet over his head to block out the early morning light.
“It’s early, only 7 a.m.,” Merlin said, petting Arthur’s covered head before hopping to his feet and shuffling away.
Arthur made an indignant noise. “It’s a bloody Saturday, why are you awake at 7 a.m.?” He peeked an eye out to watch Merlin pull on a thin t-shirt and pyjama bottoms.
Merlin shot him a baleful glance. “As loath as I am to admit it, our terrible debate last night, which you did not win, inspired an idea for the book I’m working on now.” Merlin jabbed an accusing finger at Arthur, then the door. “So off I go to get it all down on paper.”
Arthur didn’t bother to hide his smirk. “Don’t be a sore loser, Merlin.”
Merlin sniffed haughtily. He spun on his heel, calling over his shoulder, “Go back to sleep, you prat.”
Arthur snuggled back down and obliged. It was still early on a Saturday, after all.
When Arthur opened his eyes again, he flung an arm over the other side of the bed, but it whooshed through the empty air and flopped onto the sheets. Frowning, Arthur propped himself up on an elbow and glanced at the clock.
The display read 9:30 a.m. Rather impressive Merlin had been writing all this time, Arthur thought. Then again, their spirited discussion from the previous night was nothing if not thorough. Arthur mentally preened as he remembered his victory, no matter what Merlin might say on the subject.
But there would be time to lord that over Merlin another time. It might be Saturday, but he had a couple of things to take care of at the office before meeting his father for dinner.
With a sigh, Arthur dragged himself out of Merlin’s bed and picked his way through the scattered clothes on the floor for his shirt and trousers. He hurried to the bathroom to clean up, gaze lingering on the closed door of Merlin’s office as he walked by. When he returned to Merlin’s bedroom, he patted his pockets, looking for something to be left behind.
Arthur had no idea why he was still doing it, it wasn’t as if he needed an excuse to see Merlin again, but somehow the… surety made him feel better.
Patting more frantically, Arthur realized with rising panic he’d brought very little with him, having left his briefcase at work the night before since he knew he would be back in the office. With nothing but the clothes on his back, his phone, and the phone charger he’d come to collect from Merlin – for the second time – Arthur had run out of items to conveniently “forget”.
Arthur wracked his brain, spinning in place, scanning the room to make sure he hadn’t legitimately forgotten something this time.
In a fit of desperation, Arthur contemplated simply stripping off his shirt and stuffing it in Merlin’s giant pile of blankets. Arthur darted another glance at Merlin’s closed office door. If he ran fast enough and didn’t call out to Merlin until he was near the door, he stood a good chance of making it out of the flat before Merlin could notice Arthur had run out without a very obvious piece of clothing.
While he debated, Arthur’s hands rose on their own to start unbuttoning his shirt. His fingers were loosening the second button by the time Arthur snapped back to attention. He nearly choked himself redoing the buttons, appalled he’d entertained the notion.
Arthur raised a hand to rub at his face, and a glint of silver caught his eye. Arthur’s hand froze, his attention drawn to the ring on his finger reflecting the sunlight. His mother’s ring. It had been a gift from his father on his sixteenth birthday.
Ever so slowly, Arthur twirled the ring around. He bit his lip and pulled it off to study it, wondering if he was crazy to consider leaving behind such a valuable possession. But there was no reluctant tugging in his gut, no concern the ring would be lost. After all, Arthur saw Merlin at least once a week. And who could possibly blame him for wanting to come back to retrieve it?
Before Arthur could make a bigger deal of it in his head, he dropped the ring onto the nightstand, pushed it under a few papers to make it more believable he could’ve missed it, and stalked out of the bedroom.
Arthur was steps away from the door when he called over his shoulder, “I’ve got to get back to the office, have a good weekend, Merlin!”
Shuffling sounds came from Merlin’s office before the door swung open, and Merlin poked his head out. “Good luck at dinner, bye, Arthur!”
Arthur only caught the briefest glimpse of Merlin’s smiling face before the door swung shut behind him.
--
Arthur’s phone vibrated with an incoming call, Merlin’s name flashing on the screen.
“Hello?”
“Arthur, did you leave your mother’s ring here?” Merlin demanded.
Arthur winced. Perhaps leaving the ring that never left his finger wasn’t the brightest idea he’d ever had. He feigned surprise. “Did I?” He pretended to check his hand even though Merlin couldn’t see him on the other end of the line. “You seem to be correct. Work’s kicking my arse lately, can't believe I was mental enough to leave that.”
Merlin’s voice softened. “Hey, everything okay?”
“Yeah,” Arthur sighed. That last part hadn’t been a lie. “It’s been a rough few days.”
Merlin made a sympathetic noise. “Well, your ring is safe here, whenever you’re ready to come and get it.”
“How about tonight?” Arthur blurted out.
“Yeah, sure,” Merlin said softly. “Tonight works.”
--
Merlin greeted Arthur at the door dressed in a too-big t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants that hung low on his hips. He looked soft and comforting in a way that eased the stress weighing Arthur down.
“Hi, you’re late today,” Merlin said.
Arthur smiled apologetically, dropped his things inside, and kicked the door closed behind him. “Long day, just glad it’s over.”
Merlin plopped down on the couch and patted the space next to him. “Want to tell me about it?”
“Not really,” Arthur mumbled. He sat, leaning back against the couch cushions, head tipped toward Merlin. “The project wraps next week. Until then, my stress levels are through the roof.”
A smirk touched Merlin’s lips, and he slid into Arthur’s lap. “In that case,” he purred, arms winding around Arthur’s neck. “I can help with that.”
Merlin kissed him, slow and lingering. Lips trailed over his cheek and along his jawline, successfully distracting Arthur from any thoughts beyond Merlin’s body against his. Humming contentedly, Merlin nuzzled at the skin behind Arthur’s ear, and his tongue flicked out to taste.
“I can tell,” Arthur groaned, wrapping his arms around Merlin’s waist.
“Bed?” Merlin suggested between kisses.
“Bed,” Arthur agreed, but couldn’t help clinging to Merlin, pouting when he tried to get up.
Merlin chuckled in his ear and murmured, “Bed is that way.”
Reluctantly, Arthur loosened his hold and let Merlin tug him along into the bedroom. Despite Merlin’s naughty implications, drowsiness won out after they slid beneath the covers. It had been a long day. The night ended with sloppy kisses and lazy handjobs, followed by falling asleep in each other’s arms, sated and warm.
The blare of his morning alarm jolted Arthur awake. Eyes closed, he fumbled for his phone to silence the sound before it woke Merlin. Arthur had never liked waking up early, always one to snooze his alarm over and over. But these days, sleeping beside very-much-not-morning-person-Merlin had quickly cured him of the habit. The alternative was dealing with a grumpy Merlin who shoved and poked without mercy until he could go back to sleep.
Arthur slipped out of bed, leaving a sleepy Merlin still buried under the covers. The pile of blankets shifted and displeased mumbles came from within.
A fond smile crept across Arthur’s face. He sympathized, it was much too early, but Arthur could practically see the work piling up on his desk. Stifling a sigh, Arthur shuffled into the bathroom for a shower.
When Arthur returned, Merlin’s half-opened eyes peeked out from beneath the duvet in greeting.
“I’ll be quiet,” Arthur promised, flapping a hand at Merlin. “Go back to sleep.”
Merlin grunted and blinked in response, disappearing back under the covers.
Arthur choked back a laugh and turned away to retrieve his clothes. A soft rustling came from the bed before arms wrapped around Arthur’s waist from behind. Surprised, Arthur leaned into the pleasant warmth of Merlin’s chest, glancing behind him to find Merlin looking back at him with a sleepy smile.
“Good luck,” Merlin whispered, voice hoarse from sleep.
“With what?”
“Whatever your project is,” Merlin said. “You said you were stressed yesterday, and I’m going to take a wild guess that’s the reason you’re up at the crack of dawn. So, good luck.”
Arthur covered Merlin’s hand with one of his own, smiling down at the shirt clutched in his other hand. “Thanks, it means a lot you remembered.”
Merlin pressed a fleeting kiss to the back of Arthur’s neck in response and pulled away with a soft smile.
“It’s not the first and won’t be the last. You can probably tell by now – my job is demanding and the hours can be long,” Arthur said.
Merlin bent over his nightstand and returned with Arthur’s ring in hand. “Wouldn’t want to forget that,” he said with a teasing smile. His expression turned serious, and Merlin put his hands on Arthur’s shoulders. “I’ve noticed though, you’re a busy man. Tell me if I’m overstepping, but I feel like I’ve spent enough time with you to tell you that I’m here if you ever need to talk, all right?”
Arthur slipped the ring on and tried to squash the warmth spreading through his chest. “Thanks, mate. You’re a good friend.”
“Any time.” Merlin slapped Arthur’s arse lightly and added with a grin, “But off you go before you turn testy if you’re late for work.”
Arthur rolled his eyes. “There you go putting words in my mouth. I have never once been testy in my life.”
Merlin pressed his lips together and mimed zipping up his mouth, a wide-eyed innocent look on his face. Arthur narrowed his eyes – he could see the mischievous glint in Merlin’s gaze. But he let it go this once, seeing as he was actually running late for work, and he would hate to give Merlin the satisfaction of being right.
--
Arthur didn’t see Merlin again, barely even had a chance to exchange a text, until his project ended. By that point, it had been nearly a full week since he’d spoken to Merlin – a bit of a record for them.
Arthur flopped onto the couch, exhausted but too wound up to relax. Now that his project was over, all the extra energy he’d mustered to push through his work had nowhere to go. His usual way of dealing with the pent-up frustration was to find a nice warm body for the night.
But god, he was tired.
It couldn’t hurt to look though, right?
Arthur unlocked his phone and swiped through until he found the tinder app. His thumb hovered over the icon, but he didn’t click.
Impulsively, Arthur swiped away from tinder and opened his Messages app, scrolling to Merlin’s name. ’You interested in dinner tonight? ;)’ he sent.
Arthur stared at his phone in horror, wondering what he’d done.
The last time he’d seen Merlin, Arthur had been in such a rush he legitimately forgot to “forget” something at Merlin’s flat. And now he was kicking himself. In their months of knowing each other, never once had either of them reached out to the other without an excuse.
Arthur was saved from his panic when his phone vibrated with an incoming text. ’I’m making dinner now. Come over?’
Arthur let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, a relieved smile flitting across his face. He tapped out a quick response and darted out the door. ’Be there in 30.’
Arthur knocked on Merlin’s door, smiling as he listened to the sounds of stumbling from inside the flat, followed by a muffled, “Coming!” before the door flew open.
Merlin stood on the other side, wooden spoon in hand, hair in disarray. He waved the wooden spoon at Arthur in a gesture Arthur took to mean “come in” and retreated to the kitchen. “Good timing,” Merlin called over his shoulder. “I’ll be done in about ten minutes.”
Arthur shut the door behind him, slipped his shoes off, and followed. He leaned against the counter separating the kitchen from the living room and peered curiously over Merlin’s shoulder. “What are you making?”
“Spaghetti Bolognese.” Merlin lifted the wooden spoon to his lips for a taste of the sauce. He tilted his head thoughtfully and gave an approving nod.
“Fancy,” Arthur quipped, raising an impressed eyebrow. “And by that, I mean far beyond my capabilities.”
Merlin rolled his eyes, stirring the sauce with one hand. “You’re lucky I was making this tonight. Usually, I just cook enough for myself, but it’s no use making this for one meal, so I’ve made a whole pot.” He spun around and jabbed the wooden spoon in Arthur’s direction, sending droplets of sauce flying at Arthur’s face. “Otherwise, you would’ve been out of luck for dinner.”
Arthur dodged the flying sauce and raised his hands in surrender, palms facing Merlin. “All right, all right. My libido and I thank you.”
Merlin snorted, his lips quirking up in a smile. “You would. Here I was wondering what you’d forgotten this time.”
Arthur chose not to rise to the bait, not knowing how he would begin to explain his odd habit of leaving possessions behind. “Not this time.” He added cheekily, “But I’m pretty sure we still both know why I’m here.”
Merlin nodded with an exaggerated, serious air. “For my fantastic cooking skills, obviously,” he said, eyes wide and innocent as he spooned sauce over a plate of pasta and handed it to Arthur.
“Of course,” Arthur said solemnly, accepting the plate with a nod of thanks. He waited for Merlin to make a second plate before taking a seat at the kitchen table.
Arthur took an experimental bite of the pasta, his eyes widening in surprise at the pleasant balance of flavors on his tongue. “You’re a good cook.”
Merlin raised an eyebrow. He swallowed his mouthful and said, “Such a tone of surprise. I have many talents, you know.”
“Oh, I know,” Arthur said with a suggestive wink.
Merlin huffed a laugh, barely avoiding choking on his food.
“I’m glad I texted you,” Arthur said, humming happily as he stuck a bite of pasta in his mouth.
Merlin shot him a bemused glance. “Same?”
“We’ve never really done this before, you know?” Arthur gestured between them and up in the air, meaning more than the dinner they were sharing. By the softening in Merlin’s eyes, Arthur could tell he understood.
“We haven’t,” Merlin agreed. “But I’m not opposed.”
“Me neither. I almost went on tinder tonight actually. Ended up texting you instead,” Arthur admitted.
Surprise flickered across Merlin’s face. Arthur was relieved there was no trace of annoyance or offense. “Why didn’t you?” Merlin cocked his head curiously, twirling more spaghetti around his fork.
“Seemed like too much work?” Arthur tried. No, that wasn’t it. “I don’t mean that the way it sounded. It’s easy with you – being with you, I mean. It’s comfortable, and we have fun. Which certainly isn’t the case for most people I’ve hooked up with.”
“There’s something to be said for that,” Merlin said, nodding thoughtfully. “I’m sure it won’t surprise you I’ve slept with my fair share of strangers since we met too. I thought it’d be great, who doesn’t like sex, right? But it’s a little exhausting.”
“Exactly. That.” Arthur jabbed his fork at Merlin in emphasis. “And it’s not even always good. Hell, it’s mediocre at best most of the time. It’s an awful lot of work for passable sex.”
Merlin chuckled, batting Arthur’s fork away. “This is a weird conversation, isn’t it? Here we are, having dinner together before we fuck – it’s always fantastic sex, mind you – and we’re complaining about the terrible lays we’ve had in between?”
Arthur paused, considering. He shrugged and shoved the last of his pasta in his mouth. “A bit. But that’s what I mean. Yeah, this probably should be weird, but it doesn’t feel that way. Not with you.”
Merlin shook his head, looking bewildered but pleased. “I feel the same. Maybe we shouldn’t bother with the other people,” he joked.
Arthur sat up straighter and stared at Merlin. “Why don’t we?”
“Why don’t we what?” Merlin asked around a mouthful of food.
“Not bother with other people.”
Merlin froze with his fork halfway to his mouth. Slowly, he set it back down on his plate. “That’s not an entirely bad idea,” Merlin said, blinking in a daze.
Arthur grinned. “You do have a good idea here and there.”
Merlin aimed a kick at him under the table. “Are you serious about this?”
“Yeah. I’d rather sleep with you any day of the week than with some of the other people I’ve hooked up with. Like a friends with benefits, right?”
A wide smile stretched across Merlin’s face. “Friends with benefits, exactly. Does that mean I can text you when I’m in the mood for a fuck and you’ll come running to my bed?”
Arthur returned the kick. He rolled his eyes, but there was a relaxed smile on his face. “Don’t get too cocky, Merlin. Don’t forget you’ll be at my mercy too.”
“Oh?” Merlin challenged, smirking. “Can’t wait.”
Arthur threw his head back and laughed. “You’re insatiable, you know.”
Merlin leaned back and crossed his arms over his chest. “I can be. We established how hard it’s been to find good sex, and it has been nearly a week since we’ve been together. Can you blame me?”
“I won’t fight you on that,” Arthur conceded. “With that project I was working on, I’ve barely had time to sleep, much less sleep with anyone.”
Merlin made a sympathetic sound and leaned forward to pat Arthur’s hand. “How’d it go?”
Arthur heaved a sigh, carding his fingers through his hair. “It’s done, went as well as it could. My father was pleased this time.”
“That’s great news! Isn’t it?”
Arthur nodded, a tired smile crossing his lips. “Yeah, yeah, it’s good news. My father can be a difficult man to please.”
Merlin nudged Arthur with his foot until he met Merlin’s encouraging gaze. “I won’t pretend to understand, but I can tell it’s no small feat you won your father’s approval. Not that you need this from me, but I’m sure you did amazing.”
Arthur’s face melted into a grateful smile. “Thanks,” he said softly.
They lapsed into a comfortable silence while Merlin finished his food. Afterward, as Merlin cleared away their dishes and packed away the leftovers, Arthur stayed out of the way, watching and throwing the odd jibe at Merlin’s clumsiness.
“I’ll show you clumsy,” Merlin said, pouting. He growled playfully and tried to pounce on Arthur.
Arthur burst into laughter and caught Merlin around the waist, easily lifting him off his feet and dumping him onto the couch. Merlin wriggled, but Arthur didn’t give him the chance to get up. He straddled Merlin, one knee between Merlin’s hip and the couch and the other leg planted on the ground. Arthur pressed Merlin into the cushions and leaned in to capture his lips.
Merlin fit one hand at the back of Arthur’s neck and slipped the other into the back pocket of his trousers. Fingers digging into Arthur’s arse, Merlin pushed down, making Arthur collapse onto him, their hips grinding together. At the slide of Merlin’s cock against his, even through layers of clothing, Arthur groaned into Merlin’s mouth. He felt Merlin’s answering smirk against his lips.
Merlin’s hands slipped between them and shoved at Arthur’s chest. Arthur straightened, looking down at Merlin’s flushed face incredulously.
“This couch is killing my back,” Merlin said by way of explanation. He nudged Arthur off the couch and hopped to his feet before dragging Arthur in by the collar. Merlin licked his way into Arthur’s mouth, the curl of his tongue full of filthy promises.
Dazed, Arthur trailed Merlin to the bedroom where he stripped out of his clothes and tackled Merlin onto the bed. Merlin rutted against him, head tipped back, moaning in pleasure. Arthur could’ve come from the feel of Merlin’s cock alone. Gasping shallowly, Arthur closed his eyes and bit his lip, sure his teeth would break through the skin.
Merlin took advantage of Arthur’s distraction. Suddenly, Arthur was blinking up at the ceiling, and Merlin was grinning down at him, long fingers circling his hole. The touch was light and teasing, not nearly enough. Arthur glared at Merlin, gritting his teeth. “Get on with it already!”
Merlin chuckled, the deep, throaty sound sending a shiver down Arthur’s spine. Without another word, Merlin pressed already lubed fingers into him. It didn’t take long before he had Arthur grinding back against him, all but begging for Merlin to replace his fingers with his cock.
“Can’t we be patient?” Merlin purred. His fingers brushed against Arthur’s prostate, making Arthur arch and moan his name.
“You think now’s the time for patience?” Arthur panted, grabbing a handful of Merlin’s hair and jerking hard.
Merlin’s breath hitched, and Arthur filed that bit of information away for another day. With a hissed curse, Merlin pulled his fingers out and scrambled to slick his cock.
Arthur caught Merlin’s eye, smirking as he wrapped a hand around his own cock, stroking, putting on a show. Merlin’s eyes darkened and he licked his lips.
Merlin ran a hand down Arthur’s flank in a gentle caress. When he reached Arthur’s hip, his grip tightened, and he dragged Arthur down on the bed. As Merlin filled him, Arthur’s fingers fell away from his cock, too busy clutching at Merlin’s shoulders and the sheets. A litany of moans spilled from Arthur’s lips as Merlin shoved his legs further apart and pounded into him, knowing just how to find the perfect angle.
Merlin came with a groan of Arthur’s name, his hips stuttering to a stop. Holding himself up on one wobbling arm, Merlin wrapped a hand around Arthur’s cock, and with two more strokes, Arthur was spilling over Merlin’s fingers with a shout.
Merlin released Arthur’s legs and staggered away in search of a damp washcloth. Once they were both wiped clean, they flopped beneath the covers and fell asleep within minutes, Arthur’s head pillowed on Merlin’s arm.
--
Thanks to the new arrangement, Arthur and Merlin were spending a lot more time with each other – sometimes seeing each other two days in a row, other times only once or twice a week.
It was the closest Arthur had gotten to a relationship in years, and it was the longest Merlin had managed to stay involved with someone without it turning into a relationship. To both their surprise, Merlin and Arthur found they didn’t mind. It helped that as much as they enjoyed each other’s company, the night always ended in sex, so there was no mistaking the nature of their relationship.
Until the day it didn’t.
Merlin was startled awake by the sound of his phone vibrating against his nightstand. He groaned and squinted at the clock – it read 1:51 a.m.
Merlin swiped at his phone screen without bothering to check the caller’s name. “Whoever this is, this better be an emergency at this hour – “
“Merlin?” came Arthur’s weary voice through the speaker.
Merlin jolted up in bed, pulling his phone away from his ear to stare at the name on his screen. “Arthur?”
“Hi.”
Merlin flopped back down and threw an arm over his eyes. “I swear to god, Arthur, if you’re calling about sex – ”
“I’m not, I’m not!”
“Well, that’s something,” Merlin muttered. A stab of concern cut through the fog in his brain, and Merlin sat up again. “Wait, are you all right?”
“I’m fine,” Arthur reassured. “Look, this might sound dumb, but can I crash at your flat tonight?”
Stunned, Merlin had no immediate response.
Arthur hurriedly plowed on. “It’s just… I’ve only left work now, and I’m well and truly knackered. I’m not sure if I can make it back to my flat, even with a car service, and your flat was so much closer.”
Merlin’s surprise melted into sympathy. “Damn, that’s a rough night. Yeah, course you can sleep here.”
Arthur sighed in relief. “Thank god. I’m, er… walking up to your floor now.” Arthur coughed in embarrassment as Merlin burst into laughter.
“That’s awfully presumptuous of you.” Merlin swung out of bed and padded out of his bedroom toward the door.
Arthur huffed in mock annoyance. “You said yes, didn’t you?” he said, voice filtering through both the phone speaker and the door.
Merlin flipped the lock and pulled the door open, clicking the end call button at the same time Arthur dropped the phone from his ear. “Come in.”
Arthur smiled wearily, dropping his briefcase beside the coat rack and shrugging out of his jacket. “Thanks, mate. You have no idea how much this extra half hour of sleep is going to mean to me tomorrow.”
Merlin made a sympathetic noise – Arthur did look exhausted. His shoulders drooped, and his hair was limp and disheveled, as if Arthur had been running his fingers through it all day. With a gentle hand on Arthur’s arm, Merlin steered him toward the bedroom.
“I’m no stranger to late nights, as a writer. I’m just lucky my commute can be measured in steps instead of hours.”
Arthur gave a feeble chuckle and scrubbed a hand over his eyes. “Sounds nice, wish I knew what that felt like.”
“Come on,” Merlin said softly, nudging Arthur toward the bed.
Arthur made a tiny sound of protest and stumbled to a stop. “I can sleep on the couch,” he offered.
Merlin shook his head, amused by the longing look Arthur cast toward the bed. Climbing back under the covers, he said, “Have you forgotten how uncomfortable my couch is? Don’t be ridiculous, get in.”
Arthur’s breath left him in a whoosh. With a few quick movements, Arthur stripped off his shirt and trousers and crawled into bed beside Merlin. “Trying to be a gentleman,” Arthur grumbled, kicking at Merlin’s ankle lightly as he settled in.
“Pretty sure a gentleman wouldn’t be doing any of the things we do together,” Merlin pointed out. He turned away from Arthur and shuffled backward to fit his back against Arthur’s front. There was a puff of air against Merlin’s nape he suspected was a laugh, and Arthur’s arm snaked around his waist.
“Thanks again,” Arthur mumbled.
“Any time.”
--
A week after the late-night phone call to Merlin, Arthur was eating a dinner of takeaway in his office while staring down a mountain of incomplete work. At the rate he was going, he would be lucky to leave by 1 a.m. Arthur eyed his phone as he nibbled on his sandwich, wondering if Merlin would let him stay over again.
’To hell with it,’ Arthur thought. Wiping his fingers on a napkin, he grabbed his phone and texted Merlin.
Minutes later, Merlin responded with a cheerful “yes” that lifted Arthur’s mood for the rest of the night.
Soon, Arthur was spending more nights at Merlin’s flat than his own, even as his “late” nights dwindled.
After several weeks, as Arthur headed from work to Merlin’s flat – at a reasonable hour, and with plans for sex – on impulse, he ducked into a Boots around the corner to purchase a toothbrush.
The next morning, Arthur left a sleepy Merlin still burrowed under the covers to get ready for work. He retrieved the newly purchased toothbrush from where it was tucked in his bag and darted for the bathroom. Arthur stared at his reflection, hair mussed from sleep, packaged toothbrush clutched in his hand. Scoffing, he ripped open the wrapping.
Arthur’s pulse was not racing as he brushed his teeth, and he did not scrub hard enough to make himself wince. He also did not swallow nervously as he dropped his toothbrush into the cup on the edge of the sink, where it sat right beside Merlin’s toothbrush.
The next time Arthur was at Merlin’s flat, two days later, Arthur found his toothbrush right where he’d left it. He had to bite his lip to suppress a relieved smile.
Afterwards, it felt so much easier for Arthur to leave more things at Merlin’s place. He spent more and more time there, what would be the point in having to bring over the same things every time or in continuously borrowing Merlin’s things? His things migrated over piece by piece - pyjamas, an extra suit, his gym bag. It was logical. Convenient.
Arthur wondered in the back of his mind if this was how friends with benefits was meant to work. As much as he might boast about his experience, he’d never had an arrangement like this before, just oscillated wildly between serious relationships and one-night stands. But Merlin somehow managed to be the exception to all his rules.
But did it matter? Arthur liked their arrangement – whatever it should be called. There were only upsides from where he was standing. The sex was great, and he got to spend his free time with a funny, sweet Merlin who was far too easy to be around for someone he’d only known a matter of months. Not to mention Merlin had started stocking the flat with things especially for Arthur, like Arthur’s favorite tea, the milk Arthur drank every day, and a small stash of KitKats that were Arthur’s guilty pleasure.
Arthur couldn’t decide if it was normal or not, but of course, Merlin had to go and turn it upside down. Just a little.
They were lying in bed on a Sunday morning after an enthusiastic bout of morning sex that had started with Arthur waking up to Merlin's lips wrapped around his cock. Arthur had let Merlin know, loudly and frequently, that this was now his favorite way to wake up. And Merlin, tease that he was, grinned cheekily, pulled his mouth off with a wet pop, and proceeded to ride Arthur to a mind-blowing orgasm that left them sprawled bonelessly across the mattress.
Merlin rolled over and scooted back until he was nestled against Arthur, wiggling until Arthur wrapped an arm around him. “You should just move in here. Do you even go home anymore?”
Arthur froze. It felt as if all the air had been sucked out of the room. “But this is your place,” he choked out. Thankfully, Merlin was still too drunk on pleasure to notice the strangled tone of Arthur’s voice.
Merlin stifled a yawn in his pillow. “Yeah, but when was the last time you went back to your flat?”
“I was there last week picking up my navy suit!”
Merlin shot Arthur an exasperated look over his shoulder, but the effect was somewhat dulled by his half-lidded eyes and the teasing smile on his lips. “Yes, because the seven other suits you keep here were at the dry cleaners. When was the last time you slept at your own flat?”
Arthur thought hard and was surprised he came up blank. When was the last time he slept anywhere that wasn't Merlin’s flat? “I can't remember," Arthur admitted.
“I didn’t think so,” Merlin said smugly. “It was just a thought, seems like it would be easier. Clearly neither of us is sleeping with anyone else, you’re here every night you're not seeing your father, and my flat is closer to your office. And I suppose you’re not bad company.”
Arthur couldn't help but laugh, swatting Merlin’s hip in retaliation. “God help me, but you’re relatively pleasant company too,” Arthur teased, relaxing. “Fine, you’ve convinced me. Seems like I all but live here anyways, might as well move my few remaining things over.”
Merlin’s eyes crinkled in a pleased smile. “I haven't had a roommate for a while, might take some getting used to.”
“Dollophead,” Arthur snorted. “You’re the one who claims we’ve been doing this for a while now, you don't get to complain.”
“But where will I bring the other men when you have a key to let yourself in?” Merlin said in mock despair, affecting an over-the-top dismayed look that sent him dissolving into giggles.
Arthur rolled his eyes and responded by kissing the mischievous expression off Merlin’s face.
--
Arthur watched with increasing alarm as Merlin flitted around their flat. He feared Merlin would trip over Arthur’s newly moved-in exercise equipment and hurt himself somehow. Anxious, Arthur rose from his seat at the kitchen table and crept across the living room.
Merlin had tripped into the kitchen and was scrubbing a countertop, muttering under his breath. Halfway through, Merlin abandoned his soapy rag. Nudging a set of dumbbells out of the way, Arthur flattened himself against the wall to dodge Merlin’s mad dash for the bookshelf. The muttering continued as Merlin haphazardly reorganized a single shelf, then zoomed into the bedroom, only to dump out his sock drawer and frantically un-pair then re-pair socks in completely mismatched ways.
When Merlin showed no signs of slowing his upheaval of the entire flat, Arthur followed him into the bedroom. With a degree of caution one might use to calm a frightened animal, Arthur reached out and laid a tentative hand on Merlin’s shoulder.
Merlin jumped so badly Arthur leaped backward in surprise.
Merlin spun around. The agitation in Merlin’s gaze had Arthur automatically reaching out to rest his hands on Merlin’s hips and attempting to draw him close.
Frowning, Merlin resisted, folding his arms across his chest.
“What’s wrong?” Arthur tried, settling for lightly stroking Merlin’s side with his thumb. He considered it a win that Merlin didn’t push him away.
“Nothing.”
“Nothing,” Arthur repeated, raising an incredulous eyebrow. “Nothing is why you’ve been tearing the flat apart.”
Merlin glanced around at the mismatched socks littering the bed and the floor. A faint blush rose to his cheeks, and he let out a tiny huff. “Fine, it’s not nothing. I’ll be fine though.”
Arthur shuffled closer, encouraged when Merlin showed no signs of displeasure. “We can talk about it?”
Merlin sighed, shoulders slumping in defeat. “Fine. I suppose it’s only fair. You have to live with me like this, after all.”
“I hadn’t noticed,” Arthur said dryly.
“It’s my book release. It’s in two weeks.”
Arthur’s mouth dropped open. A beat later, a grin spread across his face. “Is this the one you finished just before we met? The Hunter’s Heart, right?”
Merlin nodded, the beginnings of a smile tugging at his lips.
“Brilliant! You never told me you had a release date.”
Merlin shrugged but uncrossed his arms when Arthur pulled him in for a hug. Merlin wrapped his arms loosely around Arthur’s waist, resting his chin on Arthur’s shoulder. “Had one for a while. Must’ve forgotten to mention it.”
Arthur narrowed his eyes at the deceptively casual tone in Merlin’s voice. He took hold of Merlin’s shoulders and pushed him away to peer into his face. “Why don’t you sound happy then?”
Merlin’s eyes darted around the room, his gaze landing everywhere except on Arthur’s face. “It’s how I get. Two weeks out, and I get… like this,” Merlin muttered, flapping a hand in the air. “Feels too real, I guess. I’ve been through it enough times, you’d think it’d get easier. But all I can think about is if anything will go wrong and if anyone will like the book.”
“And the odd bouts of organization around the flat?”
“Trying to distract myself,” Merlin muttered, dropping his forehead to Arthur’s shoulder.
“No more of that,” Arthur said sternly, tapping Merlin on the back of the head in punishment. “You’re making a mess and then you’ll be insufferable when you get around to setting it all to rights.”
“Sorry,” Merlin said, voice muffled by Arthur’s shirt.
A wicked grin spread across Arthur’s face. He nipped at Merlin’s earlobe and whispered, “If you put these socks away, I bet I can come up with a better way to distract you.”
Merlin’s head shot up, eyes wide with shock.
Arthur smirked. “Well?”
Merlin gulped, head bobbing frantically. He ripped himself from Arthur’s arms and stumbled around the bed picking up wayward socks, flinging them all back into his sock drawer. A laugh bubbled out of Arthur that quickly turned into a moan as Merlin shoved him back onto the bed and straddled him, grinding down on Arthur’s lap.
“I’m supposed to be distracting you,” Arthur gasped, throwing his head back as Merlin licked a stripe up his neck.
Merlin dragged Arthur’s shirt over his head. “Then do a better job,” he said huskily, his lips trailing over Arthur’s shoulder as his hands mapped Arthur’s chest.
With a growl, Arthur cupped Merlin’s arse, standing and easily lifting Merlin with him. Tipped off balance, Merlin scrabbled at Arthur’s back, nails digging into skin. Arthur tossed Merlin onto the bed and followed him down, covering Merlin’s body with his own, leaning in to capture Merlin’s lips. The kiss alternated between bruising passion and featherlight teasing, leaving Merlin chasing Arthur’s lips and panting beneath him.
While he kept Merlin’s mouth busy, Arthur reached down and shoved away Merlin’s trousers and boxers. He slid down Merlin’s body, falling to his knees between Merlin’s open legs. Merlin’s cock sprang up, and Arthur grasped it eagerly. He teased Merlin with too-light touches that had him squirming, tiny breathless laughs escaping Merlin’s throat until he gasped, “More, Arthur.”
Arthur was happy to oblige. With two hard strokes, Merlin’s whole body arched toward him. Arthur went back to gentle touches, and Merlin collapsed back onto the bed, whining in the back of his throat.
Arthur was in no hurry, fascinated with watching Merlin’s muscles twitch as he ran a palm down the length of his cock. Panting, Merlin lifted his head to glare down at Arthur, but Arthur smirked and wrapped his lips around Merlin’s cock, effectively cutting off any forthcoming protest.
As Arthur’s lips slid down his shaft, Merlin’s head fell back again. Moaning Arthur’s name, his hips bucked toward Arthur’s mouth. Arthur teased him for half an hour, keeping Merlin on the edge, reducing him to begging before Arthur took pity on him and swallowed him down, the strokes of his tongue driving Merlin insane. Merlin practically sobbed in relief as he came down Arthur’s throat.
“You…” Merlin panted. “You are far too good at that.”
Arthur preened. He stood, wincing at the stiffness in his knees from kneeling on the floor. He stretched them out and set to work removing his clothes and the rest of Merlin’s. Merlin made a sleepy “hmm” sound when Arthur prodded him to sit up to pull his shirt off.
Arthur laid down and gave Merlin fifteen minutes to recover, jostling him every minute or so to make sure he hadn’t fallen asleep. When it seemed like Merlin would be able to get hard again, Arthur slipped two fingers inside Merlin’s arse, mercilessly working his prostate until Merlin’s cock was hard and leaking again.
Merlin’s whimpers turned into loud moans as Arthur fucked into him. He clutched weakly at Arthur’s shoulders, eyes rolling back in his head. Merlin came a second time, with Arthur following close behind.
After Arthur slipped out of Merlin, he got them cleaned up and crawled back into bed, gathering Merlin into his arms and arranging his boneless limbs into a more comfortable position.
Head pillowed on Arthur’s chest, Merlin hummed drowsily and said, “Definitely a better distraction than what I had in mind.”
A laugh rumbled out of Arthur. “I should hope so.”
“Mmm, could get used to that,” Merlin mumbled. He was snoring within minutes.
Arthur was gently combing his fingers through Merlin’s hair when Merlin woke several hours later. Merlin pushed into the touch, letting out a contented sigh when Arthur dragged his nails over his scalp.
“Had a nice nap?” Arthur said, amused.
Merlin opened one eye and snuggled down into Arthur’s chest, nudging at Arthur’s hand with his head until Arthur resumed his petting. “It was rather nice, yes.”
“Must be nice to have enough time for a midday nap.”
Merlin aimed a flick at Arthur’s side, making Arthur twist away and catch his wrist to prevent him from doing it again. “Prat, as if you weren’t the reason I fell asleep.”
“I was, wasn’t I,” Arthur said, feeling quite satisfied with himself.
“Don’t flatter yourself,” Merlin shot back. “You’re a good distraction is all.”
“Right.” Arthur looked down at Merlin. “So I must’ve imagined the begging. About how you would simply die if I didn’t fuck you right this moment.”
Merlin scowled and flushed red. “You do have an active imagination, don’t you,” he sniffed.
“If that’s what you need to believe.” Arthur patted Merlin’s arm in a mock comforting fashion. “I can’t believe it never occurred to you to ask me to help take your mind off things.”
“Never had that happen before,” Merlin mumbled against Arthur’s skin.
“Seriously? None of your boyfriends ever offered to distract you with sex? What better distraction is there?”
“Told you I didn’t have the greatest boyfriends.” Merlin peeked up at Arthur with a wry smile.
“Sure, but who would turn down sex like that?” Arthur said incredulously.
Merlin shrugged and muttered something incomprehensible.
Arthur huffed and dragged Merlin closer, squeezing him comfortingly. “Idiots,” he scoffed.
Merlin’s gaze was soft when he lifted his head to look at Arthur. He tilted his head and sent Arthur a wicked grin. “I take it you’re not opposed to this method of distraction then?”
“Oh, I am up for that as many times as it takes,” Arthur said, returning Merlin’s grin. He tangled his fingers in Merlin’s hair and dragged him in for a kiss. “Or as many times as I can get it up. Whichever comes first.”
“My hero,” Merlin quipped, laughing as he pressed closer.
--
It turned out Merlin’s distractions came in many forms and, to Arthur’s disappointment, did not result in days filled with endless sex.
Merlin’s second-best form of distraction was throwing himself into his writing. In fact, when Merlin wasn’t having sex with Arthur, he was locked in his office. So when Arthur wasn’t at work, he checked on Merlin every few hours, pressing his ear to the door to confirm the furious typing sounds hadn’t stopped. Once in a while, if it had been too long since Merlin last emerged, he would drag Merlin out of his office for a glass of water or to ’please, for the love of god, walk a lap around the flat so you don’t forget how to use your legs’.
Three days after Merlin’s fit of frenzy, Arthur returned home to a dark flat, a sliver of light peeking out from under the office door. Groping along the wall, Arthur fumbled for the light switch and flipped it on. He toed off his shoes and padded across the living room, poking his head into the bedroom to see if Merlin was asleep.
He wasn’t.
It was only 9 p.m., not late enough for Arthur to expect Merlin to be in bed. But Merlin had been awake before him, and Arthur had left him in his office before leaving for work. After a full day of writing, Arthur sincerely hoped he would return to find Merlin anywhere else.
He rapped two knuckles against Merlin’s office door. When no response came, Arthur pressed his ear to the wood and frowned at the silence within. Gently, he pushed the door open. Merlin was sprawled across his desk, head buried in the crook of his elbow.
“Merlin?” Arthur called softly.
Merlin didn’t stir.
It wasn’t the first time Arthur had found Merlin asleep at his desk, but it was worrying considering how tirelessly Merlin had been working. Sighing in fond exasperation, Arthur padded to Merlin’s side and laid a gentle hand on his shoulder. He shook Merlin lightly. “Merlin, wake up.”
Merlin gave a short whine and nuzzled into his arm.
“Come on, Merlin,” Arthur tried again, shaking his shoulder a little harder.
“G’way,” Merlin mumbled, feebly batting at Arthur with one hand.
An involuntary smile crept across Arthur’s face, but he quickly arranged his features into a stern frown in case Merlin opened his eyes. Arthur did not want to encourage this behavior, no matter how adorable it was.
“It’s late,” Arthur murmured, rubbing Merlin’s back in soothing circles. “Come to bed.”
Merlin ignored Arthur, not bothering to dignify his last request with a response.
“You’re leaving me no choice, Merlin,” Arthur warned, tone much too fond to be scolding.
Merlin gave no indication he was going to move.
Arthur shrugged and pulled Merlin’s chair back from the desk. Merlin flapped an arm, lifting his head to make an irritated sound. Arthur ignored him, simply slid one arm under his knees, another behind his back, and hoisted Merlin into his arms.
That got Merlin’s attention. His limbs flailed, forcing Arthur to dig his fingers in to avoid dropping him. After knocking Arthur in the shoulder and kicking him in the side, Merlin settled with his arms around Arthur’s neck. He stared at Arthur with wide, startled eyes, blinking rapidly to clear away the haze of sleep.
“Arthur?” he asked, voice rough and scratchy from disuse.
“Merlin.”
Merlin glanced around him and fixed Arthur with a confused look. “What’s going on?”
Exasperated, Arthur looked pointedly out the darkened window, at the mess of papers on the desk, and back at Merlin’s bewildered face. When he was sure Merlin wouldn’t fight him, he adjusted his hold and strode out of the office. “What is going on, Merlin, is that you fell asleep at your desk. Do you know what time it is?”
Merlin winced, looking suitably abashed. “No?”
Arthur heaved a sigh and deposited Merlin on the bed. Taking advantage of his dazed confusion, Arthur pulled off Merlin’s slippers and swung his legs into bed. He shot Merlin a stern look. “I know you’re stressed, so I’ll drop it. But it’s late, you’re exhausted, and if you’re going to sleep, you’re going to do it in a bed.”
Arthur was prepared for a barrage of protests, but instead, Merlin nodded meekly, as cooperative as you please when Arthur gestured for him to shift so he could pull the covers up.
Merlin was quiet, burrowing into the blankets while Arthur puttered around the bedroom. “Thanks, Arthur,” he whispered.
Arthur turned to find Merlin’s gaze following him around the room. “Someone needs to make sure you take care of yourself.”
Merlin chuckled. “Aren’t you coming to bed?”
“In a minute,” Arthur said and patted Merlin’s leg through the blankets as he passed.
Arthur hadn’t been planning to go to sleep yet, but with Merlin warm and pliant in bed and looking at him with those soft eyes, Arthur found he didn’t mind turning in for an early night. He took a lap around the flat, checking the door was locked and the lights were off. When he returned to the bedroom, Merlin’s eyes were half-closed, clearly struggling to stay awake while he waited.
Arthur gazed down at him with an indulgent smile. He tossed his clothes into the laundry pile, pulled on a pair of pyjama bottoms, and slid into bed.
As they slotted together, Merlin’s back molding against Arthur’s chest, Merlin nuzzled his pillow and murmured a quiet, “Good night, Arthur.”
“Good night, Merlin,” Arthur murmured back, pressing a light kiss behind Merlin’s ear.
--
Nearly every night before the book release, Arthur came home to a quiet, darkened flat, Merlin snoring away in his office. It became a nightly routine for Arthur to check on Merlin when he got home from work, to make sure Merlin made it into bed at the end of each day.
With days of practice, Arthur liked to think he mastered the delicate balancing act of waking Merlin with the least fuss.
Upon arriving home, he would tiptoe into the office, lay a gentle hand on Merlin’s head, and spend long minutes carding his fingers through Merlin’s hair, murmuring quiet words – usually mindless chatter about his day – until Merlin began to stir. Some days it was easy to coax Merlin awake, requiring only a few head scratches for Merlin’s eyes to flutter open. Other days, Merlin whined and tried to wave him off, and Arthur would resort to promises of homemade breakfast, along with a litany of persuasive kisses, before Merlin would deign to crack an eye open. The worst days were the first few, when Arthur was too heavy-handed, leaving Merlin grumpy and irritable, and leaving Arthur no choice but to give in and carry him to bed.
It never once crossed Arthur’s mind to leave Merlin be and let him find his own way to bed. Besides, Merlin’s sleepy snuffles never failed to put a smile on his face, and there was no better way to end the day than to fall asleep with Merlin cuddled in his arms.
The two weeks flew by, and when the release date came and went, Arthur breathed a sigh of relief for Merlin’s sanity.
The first reviews were quick to trickle in, and the praise was overwhelming, as to be expected, Arthur insisted. Over the days following the book release, Merlin’s tense smiles melted back into the relaxed, bright-eyed grins Arthur was used to. It was like something clicking back into place – Arthur hadn’t realized how much he missed those easy smiles until they were gone.
So that Friday night, Arthur was bemused to arrive home to find Merlin humming under his breath, vacuum in hand while trying not to trip over the edge of the rug.
“Stressed again?” Arthur asked, his eyes following Merlin’s progress across the living room.
Merlin’s head snapped up and a warm smile spread across his face. “Arthur, you’re home! I was expecting you to work later.”
Arthur padded over to Merlin, dropped a kiss on his cheek, and nudged the vacuum with his foot. “Vacuuming on a Friday night?”
Merlin shot him a sheepish smile. “I must’ve forgotten to tell you. My friends and I have a tradition where we have a little get-together the weekend after my book releases. I’m cleaning since they’re coming over tomorrow night.”
“Oh,” Arthur said, surprised. “That’s a lovely tradition.”
“No pressure, but you’re welcome to join us,” Merlin said. His voice went up at the end, his words somewhere between a question and a request. His eyes darted to Arthur’s and quickly away, half hopeful, half nervous.
A small smile crept over Arthur’s face. He was touched to be invited. “If I wouldn’t be in the way, I’d love to.”
Merlin beamed, resuming his humming and vacuuming. “Not at all, the more the merrier.”
The next night, Merlin was sprawled on the couch with his head in Arthur’s lap. They were both scrolling on their phones when a knock sounded.
Merlin leaped up and bounded to the door. He threw it open, greeting the couple standing in the doorway brightly. “Gwen! Lance!”
“Congratulations, Merlin!” Gwen pounced first, grabbing Merlin’s arm and pulling him into a tight hug.
Lance was quick to follow. With a wide grin, he clasped Merlin’s shoulder and wrapped his arm around Merlin in an affectionate squeeze. “Congratulations, Merlin, we all knew this one would be amazing like the others.”
Merlin flushed and ducked his head. “You never know,” he said, flapping a hand to wave Gwen and Lance inside. “Fans are fickle creatures.”
Gwen rolled her eyes as she shrugged out of her coat and hung it on the coat rack. Planting her hands on her hips, she pinned Merlin with a look. “That they are, but don’t pretend you write just to please the fans. We all know it’s your love of writing that keeps you going.”
Before Merlin could retort, Gwen’s gaze landed on Arthur sitting on the couch. Arthur had been watching the exchange, amused but not wanting to intrude. “Hello,” Arthur said, giving a small wave.
Gwen’s eyes darted between Arthur and Merlin. She marched forward and stuck her hand in Arthur’s face. “Hello there, you must be Arthur. I’m Merlin’s friend, Guinevere, but most people call me Gwen.”
Arthur rose to his feet and shook the proffered hand. “It’s very nice to meet you, Gwen.”
Lance appeared at her shoulder, armed with a welcoming smile and handshake of his own. “Hello, Arthur. I’m Lance, Merlin’s friend and Gwen’s boyfriend.”
“Lovely to meet you both,” Arthur said, nodding first at Gwen, then at Lance. “I’ve heard a lot about you from Merlin, it’s nice to put a face to a name.”
Gwen and Lance exchanged a look, and Gwen said, “Us as well, we’re glad you could make it today.”
“Considering I live here, would’ve been awfully hard for me to miss,” Arthur quipped, trying to break the ice with a jaunty smile.
Gwen cocked her head to the side, as if studying him. Whatever she found seemed to satisfy her because her stance relaxed, and she returned his smile with a bright one of her own. “Right, but I’m sure you could’ve made other plans. Book releases, even if they are one of many, are important to Merlin, and it means a lot you’re here.”
“Gwen!” Merlin squawked in the background. Gwen shot an innocent smile over her shoulder before turning back to Arthur.
Arthur cleared his throat and waved a hand in the air. “Like you said, it’s important to Merlin,” he said, darting a glance at Merlin.
Another knock came at the door, and when Merlin opened it, two men stepped inside. One grinned and immediately pulled Merlin into a hug, pounding him on the back while the other looked on in amusement. “What did we say, Merlin?” the man said, kicking the door shut behind him and slinging an arm over Merlin’s shoulders. “Nothing to worry about!”
Merlin laughed and elbowed the man in the ribs. “Oh, shut up, Will.”
Will ruffled Merlin’s hair and pulled away to say hello to Gwen and Lance, allowing Merlin to greet the other man.
“Merlin! Never doubted you for a second, mate,” the second man said as he pulled Merlin into a hug of his own.
“Thanks, Elyan,” Merlin said, squeezing him back.
Elyan turned his attention to the rest of the room. He greeted Gwen and Lance warmly, kissing Gwen on the cheek and exchanging pats on the back with Lance.
As one, Will and Elyan turned to Arthur. Will approached, a wary look in his eyes.
The air grew heavy with tension – they could all feel it. Drawing in a deep breath, Arthur offered his hand and flashed his most charming smile. “Hello, I’m Arthur.”
Will grasped Arthur’s fingers loosely and gave his hand a barely-there shake. “I’m Will,” he said curtly. “So, you’re the bloke I helped Merlin find on tinder.”
“It’s nice to meet you?”
“You too,” Will sniffed. He was mentally sizing Arthur up, and Arthur got the distinct impression he had been found wanting. “You two know this isn’t how hookups work, right?”
Arthur spluttered while Merlin gave a scandalized shout of “Will!” from the other side of the room.
“What?” Will said, spreading his hands innocently.
Merlin marched to Arthur’s side and shot Will a glare. “We’re friends, all right?”
Will snorted, looking between the two of them. “Right, just friends.”
“Well, I didn’t say that’s all we were,” Merlin muttered, flushing red.
It was Arthur’s turn to be scandalized. “Merlin!”
“Oh, come on, it’s not a secret.” Merlin elbowed Arthur in the side.
“All right, all right, enough flirting,” Will said, taking two steps back and holding his hands up in a gesture of surrender.
“We’re not flirting,” Merlin grumbled.
Will gave an exaggerated roll of his eyes. “Sure, and your couch isn’t a bag of rocks.”
“Everyone always taking shots at my couch,” Merlin said, dramatically throwing a hand in the air.
“Merlin,” Gwen piped up. “We’ve all tried crashing on that couch before. It’s truly terrible. At this point, we would all chip in if you would just buy a new one.”
Arthur hid his laugh with a cough. Merlin shot Arthur a narrow-eyed glare. “Do you have something to add?”
Arthur patted Merlin’s arm and shrugged. “Nothing you haven’t heard before. You yourself admit the couch is uncomfortable.”
During the conversation, Lance had slipped around everyone into the kitchen. He reappeared with beers in hand and passed them around the room, saying, “Why don’t we remember the reason we all came here today? To celebrate Merlin? If we start on the twentieth rendition of this couch argument, we’ll be here all night.”
A round of sheepish laughter rippled through the group.
“Lance has a point,” Elyan said, shaking his head and cracking open his beer. “Tell us, Merlin, how does it feel to know you haven’t lost your touch?”
Arthur covered his proud smile with a sip of his beer, resting a hand on the small of Merlin’s back when Merlin leaned into him.
Merlin flushed, embarrassed. “Same as always, I guess. You know how I get. After all these years, something about those last two weeks still makes me crazy. But see, all fine now.” Merlin spread his hands and wiggled his fingers as if to prove his point.
Will reached over and cuffed Merlin affectionately on the back of the head. “Oh, I know. I used to live with you, remember? And those early days,” Will whistled through his teeth, “it was a rough go of things.”
“How bad was it?” Arthur asked, curiosity piqued. “Now that I have firsthand experience, I must admit I’m curious how much he’s mellowed out.”
“Arthur doesn’t need to hear this,” Merlin said in a warning tone.
“I think he does,” Will chortled.
Gwen cut in, kindly trying to head off the squabble. “Arthur, why don’t you tell us how it’s been living with Merlin first? Then Will can tell us all how much better Merlin deals with the stress these days.”
Arthur nodded, slipping his arm around Merlin to grip his waist comfortingly. “It’s probably not like what you’re all thinking. Even the past two weeks included, we’ve gotten on fine living together. Merlin’s scatterbrained and can’t sit still for more than two minutes, but it’s normal to be stressed about a big event. Sure, a little warning would’ve been nice when he started turning the flat upside down, but we worked it out.”
Will gaped at Arthur. “You are being much too charitable about this disaster.” He jabbed an accusing finger at Merlin.
Merlin smirked, taking a casual swig of his beer. “What can I say, Will? Arthur has his ways.”
Will blinked and scrunched up his nose. “Ew, I don’t need to hear about your sex life, mate.”
Arthur choked on his drink while Merlin sniggered beside him.
Gwen cocked her head and looked between Merlin and Arthur with surprise. “No details, please, but Merlin, you’ve had plenty of boyfriends. Are you telling us they never – ” she bit her lip and mimed a crude gesture, “ – helped?”
Merlin’s lips twisted in a rueful smile. “Gwen, you know I haven’t had the best boyfriends,” he said softly.
The group lapsed into silence, and Arthur jumped in to try and lighten the mood. “Sex life aside, the biggest hurdle was Merlin constantly falling asleep in his office.”
“Yes!” Will slapped his hand on his thigh and jabbed a finger at Merlin again. “You are impossible when you do that! Out of the goodness of my heart, I tried time and time again to wake you up when I found you asleep on your desk, and all I got was a kick in the shin for my troubles. Nothing to do but to leave him there until he wakes up.”
“Oh, it took me a try or two to figure out how to handle him, but I find it’s pretty easy to get him into bed,” Arthur said.
Will squinted at Arthur. “Was that…?”
A flush spread up Arthur’s neck as the innuendo in his words sank in. “No! I meant literally to get him to go to sleep in a bed.”
“How do you manage that?”
Arthur shrugged, toying with the neck of his beer bottle. “Merlin’s a bit like a big cat. Pet his hair or rub his back, and he’ll wake up eventually. Once he’s awake, as long as he’s in a good mood, I can shuffle him off to the bedroom.” With a smirk, Arthur added, “If all else fails, I pick him up and carry him off.”
Will looked begrudgingly impressed. “Even if those aren’t things I would necessary do myself, well done for learning how to deal with this one.”
“’This one’ is right here,” Merlin complained.
Arthur nudged Merlin with his hip. “Don’t be mad, you work too hard. Everyone in this room knows how talented you are, there’s no need for you to work yourself to death, you know?”
A soft smile flitted across Merlin’s lips. There was no bite to his words when he retorted, “Says the bloke who regularly works late into the night and on the weekends?”
“Do as I say, not as I do,” Arthur said solemnly.
“You two are a pair,” Lance said, clearly holding back a laugh.
“A pair of what?” Merlin asked.
“Just a pair,” Lance said, shaking his head and exchanging an amused glance with Gwen.
As the night went on and the conversation drifted to other topics, Arthur was able to relax and focus more on getting to know Merlin’s friends. He learned Elyan was Gwen’s younger brother and spent the better part of the night talking and laughing with him and Lance. He got along swimmingly with them, who were both football fans like him. Arthur was delighted to find they reminded him of his own friends. Before the end of the night, Arthur had extended an invitation for them to join him the next time Arthur and his friends played a pickup game of football.
Arthur had the chance to get to know Gwen when he noticed her gathering up dishes and cleaning up while Merlin was engrossed in conversation with Will. He offered to help her, and going by the grateful smile he received in return, Arthur was pretty sure he’d earned some points in her book. Gwen was a sweet girl who was easy to talk to. While helping her dry dishes in the kitchen, Arthur learned she met Merlin on their first day of uni, and they’d met Lance when they tried out for fencing club together. For Lance and Gwen, it had been love at first sight.
Will was the only one Arthur couldn’t seem to make any headway with. Arthur could tell he was protective of Merlin, and he couldn’t blame him, considering Merlin’s track record with men.
So, Arthur was entirely unprepared when, at the end of the night, as everyone was heading out the door, Will clapped Arthur on the shoulder and said, “I suppose I should thank you. For helping Merlin finally separate his feelings from his dick.”
Arthur barked a surprised laugh, and Will cracked a smile, joining in with a small chuckle of his own.
Merlin buried his face in his hands. “I officially regret letting any of you meet Arthur.”
Arthur slung an arm around Merlin’s waist and pulled him close. He nudged the side of Merlin’s face with his nose and said, “But I’ve done you a great service, Merlin!”
Merlin glared, but it quickly melted into a small smile, his eyes twinkling as they met Arthur’s mischievous gaze. Shaking his head, Merlin leaned into Arthur’s side. “Great service, my arse,” he snorted.
Arthur bit his lip, struggling not to laugh. When Merlin caught his eye, the innuendo registered in his head as well. He aimed a light slap at Arthur’s chest. “Shut up, you prat.”
When they turned their attention back to Will, Elyan, Gwen, and Lance, the four of them were watching them with near-identical amused expressions on their faces.
Merlin tilted his head to the side and opened his mouth to speak, but Gwen cut him off by wrapping Merlin in a hug. “Congratulations again, Merlin. We’re so proud of you.” She reached over and patted Arthur’s arm. “And Arthur, it was very nice to meet you.”
The sentiment was echoed by Lance, Elyan, and Will, and in a flurry of hugs and goodbyes, Arthur and Merlin found themselves alone once again.
“Your friends are great,” Arthur said.
Merlin smiled and dropped his head onto Arthur’s shoulder. “I’m glad you thought so. You’re my friend too, I was hoping you’d get along.”
Arthur smirked. “Just your friend, was it?”
Merlin chuckled, slipping his hand into Arthur’s and tugging him toward the bedroom. Merlin plopped down on the edge of the bed and spread his legs invitingly. There was a wicked grin on his lips when he looked up at Arthur through his lashes. “There might be some benefits involved too.”
Arthur laughed and shoved Merlin backward. He followed Merlin down and covered the answering laugh with his mouth.
--
According to Arthur, since he’d met Merlin’s friends, it only made sense for Merlin to accompany Arthur to meet his friends for drinks.
The Avalon was a nice pub, Merlin observed as the door closed behind them. It was close to Arthur’s old flat, so he wasn’t surprised it was more upscale than The Rising Sun. They hung up their coats – the mere existence of a coat rack for its patrons was a step up from the places Merlin tended to frequent – and out of the corner of his eye, Merlin caught sight of someone waving in their direction.
He nudged Arthur, gesturing at the man who was waving. “Is that your friend?”
Arthur glanced up. His face broke into a smile, and he waved back. “That it is. That’s Leon.”
Leon was standing beside a booth near the back of the pub. As Merlin trailed Arthur across the room, he noticed a dark-haired woman sitting in the booth behind Leon. When they closed the distance, Arthur clasped Leon’s arm, pulling him in for a hug. The woman slipped gracefully out of the booth and exchanged kisses on the cheek with Arthur.
When two pairs of eyes turned to Merlin, Arthur reached back to wrap his fingers around Merlin’s wrist and tug him closer. He gestured at the two people in turn and said, “Merlin, this is my sister, Morgana. And this is my friend and her husband, Leon.”
Arthur caught Merlin’s eye with a small smile, letting go only to sling an arm around his shoulders. “Leon, Morgana, this is my friend, Merlin.”
Understanding dawned on their faces, and Merlin felt a flush crawl up his neck at the way Morgana’s smile turned sly. “Friend, was it?” she said sweetly.
“Morgana, darling,” Leon said, an edge of warning in his voice. He extended a hand to Merlin and offered a warm smile. “Merlin, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”
Merlin accepted the hand gratefully and gave it a firm shake. “Same to you both. Arthur speaks of you often.”
“I can’t imagine much of it’s good.” Morgana smirked, flicking her hair over her shoulder.
“You think correctly,” Arthur retorted. He dragged Merlin with him into the booth, rolling his eyes at Morgana.
Morgana slid in across from Merlin and propped her chin on one hand, drumming the fingers of her other hand on the table. Her gaze was piercing when it fell on Merlin’s face, a knowing smile on her lips. “So, Merlin, tell us about yourself.”
Merlin floundered, not prepared to be the center of attention. He barely hid his relief when he was saved from answering by Leon calling, “Gwaine! Percival!”
Two more men appeared at the end of the table. One was tall and broad-shouldered, with biceps as wide as Merlin’s head. The other was slightly shorter and had long, shiny hair, with a roguish air about him that Merlin immediately liked. Arthur’s knee knocked against Merlin’s, and he scrambled out of the booth, stepping aside so Arthur could greet the newcomers.
There were hugs and claps on the back all around before Arthur turned back to Merlin. “Merlin, this is Gwaine and Percival. We all went to uni together. Gwaine, Percival, this is my friend, Merlin.”
“Hi there,” Merlin said with a friendly smile and a wave.
Gwaine stepped forward and clapped Merlin on the shoulder. He didn’t try to hide the way his gaze swept down Merlin’s body, and his smile turned flirtatious. “Nice to meet you, mate. Where’d Arthur find you?”
Behind Gwaine, Arthur’s entire body tensed.
Distracted by wondering what Arthur’s deal was, Merlin didn’t get a chance to respond before Arthur grabbed Gwaine’s shoulder and jerked him back, slipping around to stand a half-step in front of Merlin. “Tinder,” Arthur said curtly. “But that’s not the point. Aren’t we here to catch up?”
Gwaine’s eyebrows shot up to his hairline. “Of course. Glad you could join us, Merlin.”
When Gwaine trotted away to fetch two chairs, Percival stepped forward and gripped Merlin’s hand in a friendly shake. “Don’t mind Gwaine, that’s his natural state. I hope he doesn’t put you off, it’s very nice to meet you.”
Merlin laughed – Arthur’s friends were odd, but he liked them. “Not at all, he seems harmless. It’s lovely to meet you all too.”
Before Merlin could continue the conversation, Arthur grabbed his arm and yanked him back into the booth. Leon and Morgana slid in opposite them, and Gwaine and Percival sat at the end of the booth in the two chairs Gwaine procured.
Merlin spent most of the night observing, sipping his drink, and laughing along as the conversation flowed. Arthur’s friends had welcomed him with open arms, and Merlin fit in easily when the conversation offered him opportunities to step in with his own commentary.
When Arthur left to get them another round of drinks, Gwaine leaned close, the flirtatious smile back on his lips. “So, Merlin, I hear you and Arthur are living together?”
Merlin nodded, tossing back the last of his drink. “We are, it’s been about a month now.”
“How’s that been? Arthur driven you crazy yet?” Gwaine snickered.
“Not at all,” Merlin said honestly. “He’d been spending so much time at my flat, I’m the one who asked him to move in.”
Surprise flickered over Gwaine’s face. “I would never have guessed.” He winked playfully, and added, “I would never have put you down for one to get involved with Arthur. Someone as gorgeous as you, can’t believe you weren’t spoken for.”
A pleasant warmth curled in Merlin’s chest at the flattery. He felt his cheeks flush and shook his head with an embarrassed laugh. “It’s a long story, but I think you’re giving me too much credit.”
“Hmm,” Gwaine hummed, his gaze appreciative as it flicked up and down Merlin’s body, a seductive smile curling his lips. “Not sure about that, but I’d love to hear it sometime.”
Gwaine reeled back as an arm appeared between them and three pints were slammed down on the table. Merlin glanced up in surprise to find Arthur scowling down at Gwaine as he set three more pints down.
“Leave Merlin alone,” Arthur snapped.
Merlin slid further into the booth, making room for Arthur to sit in the spot closer to Gwaine. “Arthur, it’s fine,” he tried to protest.
“It’s not fine,” Arthur said sharply, squeezing in beside Merlin and resting a hand on Merlin’s thigh under the table. Merlin shivered at the contact, the heat from Arthur’s fingers like a brand on his skin even through the fabric of his trousers.
Gwaine’s eyes darted between Arthur and Merlin. Something akin to understanding flickered over his features, and he crowded into Arthur’s space, challenging. “You heard the man. Merlin said it was fine.”
“It’s called being polite, Gwaine,” Arthur retorted, shoving a pint at Gwaine with enough force to slosh beer over the rim.
Gwaine raised the pint in a mockery of a toast and took a swig. “Come on, Arthur, trying to keep him all to yourself? Merlin should know he has options.” His gaze was heated but cheeky when he flashed Merlin a grin.
Arthur pushed a pint more gently in front of Merlin and snatched one for himself, glaring at Gwaine while he took a sip. “Enough, Gwaine,” he practically growled.
Merlin didn’t understand why the atmosphere suddenly turned tense. Sure, Gwaine was flirting up a storm, but Merlin could handle himself. And if Percival was to be believed, he suspected this was Gwaine being Gwaine. To try and smooth things over, Merlin shot both Arthur and Gwaine an easy smile and said, “That’s a very kind offer, Gwaine. You seem like a nice bloke, but I’ll have to decline.”
Some tension bled out of Arthur’s shoulders. Gwaine shrugged and leaned back in his chair, returning Merlin’s smile with an open, friendly one of his own. “Can’t blame a man for trying.”
Merlin’s breath hitched when Arthur’s grip tightened on his thigh. He patted Arthur’s hand, leaving his fingertips resting against Arthur’s skin.
“Never know when to give it a rest,” Arthur grumbled under his breath.
Gwaine caught Arthur’s eye. Merlin watched, bewildered as a wordless exchange took place – an entire conversation held through frowns and meaningful glances. More than once, Gwaine or Arthur’s gaze flicked to him, making Merlin squirm in his seat.
“Ow!” Gwaine yelped.
Arthur bared his teeth, all honey and sweetness as he said, “My foot slipped.”
Merlin knew he was missing something. But Arthur turned his attention to the other side of the table, striking up a conversation with Leon, so Merlin gave up trying to work it out.
When empty pints sat littered around the table, Morgana piped up, “Another round, everyone?”
“Sure, last one for me though,” Arthur said. The others echoed similar sentiments.
Leon shuffled out of the booth, and Morgana stood with a flourish, smoothing down her dress. She extended a hand toward Merlin and said, “Merlin, won’t you come help me carry the drinks?”
Merlin blinked, surprised. “Of course, Morgana.”
Arthur glanced at Morgana suspiciously. “Why didn’t you ask Leon?”
Morgana smiled innocently and yanked Arthur out of the booth by the arm. Merlin could tell Morgana had dug her nails in by Arthur’s wince. “I want to get to know my brother’s new friend.”
“It’s fine, Arthur, I’m happy to help her,” Merlin said as reassuringly as he could.
“See?” Morgana winked at Arthur. She tucked her arm in Merlin’s and steered him toward the bar, leaving Arthur to stare after them.
“Arthur is awfully protective, isn’t he?” Morgana said, patting Merlin’s arm.
Merlin glanced back, catching Arthur turning away. “Is he?”
“Hmm,” Morgana hummed. They joined the small cluster of people waiting to order at the bar. While they waited, Morgana looked up at Merlin, studying him. “So, what’s the deal with you and my brother?”
Merlin spluttered. “Excuse me?”
Morgana chuckled and rolled her eyes. “Merlin, we all know how Arthur is. He hasn’t had a relationship in years, and he’s not shy about sleeping around.” Merlin nodded along, and Morgana seemed surprised at Merlin’s lack of surprise. “But you seem to be well aware of that.”
Merlin shrugged. “We’ve discussed it. Both his history and mine.”
“Interesting,” Morgana mused. “Even more so then, since I wouldn’t have pegged you as the same type of man.”
Merlin looked away with a rueful twist of the lips. “I wasn’t. Before. But you heard Arthur, we met on tinder. I’m sure you can extrapolate from there.”
“True, but Arthur’s never brought anyone to meet our friends before,” Morgana said, carefully watching Merlin’s face for his reaction.
“I’m not surprised,” Merlin admitted. “The two of us hit it off easily though. He got snowed in at my flat the first night we met. We’ve kept seeing each other since, and kind of fell into a friendship.”
“So, friends with benefits, is that a fair statement?”
Merlin squirmed and gave an awkward laugh. “I suppose that’s the right term for it, yes.”
“I’m surprised, is all,” Morgana said. She placed their order with the bartender before her eyes returned to searching Merlin’s face. “I never thought Arthur would be able to live with another person without driving them insane.”
Merlin shook his head and smiled, shooting a fond glance at Arthur back at the booth. “He’s really not that bad, you know.”
Morgana snorted. “You can’t fool me, Merlin. He’s my brother, I lived with him for years.”
“No, no, I’m being serious,” Merlin tried to explain. “We’ve had our share of arguments – I think that’s unavoidable. But he’s been great, really. I had a stressful time recently, and Arthur was wonderful. If it wasn’t for him, I’m pretty sure I would have spent two straight weeks sleeping at my desk instead of in an actual bed.”
Morgana stared at Merlin for so long he wondered if he’d said something wrong. Finally, she said, “Arthur took care of you?”
“Yes?”
Morgana nodded slowly and tucked her hand back at Merlin’s elbow, tipping her head to rest on Merlin’s shoulder. “Arthur is full of surprises,” she murmured, quietly enough Merlin wasn’t sure if he was meant to hear.
They returned to their booth with the drinks, and when Arthur sent Merlin a questioning look, Merlin responded with a bright smile, which seemed sufficient to ease the pinched expression on Arthur’s face. They turned back to the conversation, and Merlin noticed Morgana watching them, a contemplative look on her face.
As the night grew later and their drinks ran dry, Arthur stretched and yawned, rolling his shoulders. “I think it’s time to call it a night. Merlin?”
Merlin covered a yawn of his own and nodded. “No objections here.”
Merlin stood out of the way as goodbye hugs were exchanged all around. Morgana was the first to approach him, arms open and outstretched. Surprised, but touched, Merlin stepped closer and wrapped Morgana in a loose hug.
“You’re good for him,” Morgana whispered into his ear.
Before he had a chance to respond, Morgana had pulled away, offering him a smile and a pat on the shoulder. Loud enough for everyone to hear, she added, “We’re all so happy to have met you, Merlin.”
Morgana slipped away smoothly, and Merlin blinked after her until Gwaine swept him into an enthusiastic hug. “You should join us more often,” Gwaine said, shooting Merlin a playful grin.
Merlin’s eyes softened, and he returned the grin. “Thanks, I’d be happy to.”
Gwaine clapped a hand on his shoulder and used the leverage to pull Merlin in close to whisper in his ear, “And if you ever get tired of Arthur, you know where to find me.”
Merlin flushed, and Gwaine spun away with one last saucy wink. Arthur appeared at Merlin’s side, grabbing him by the arm and dragging him out into the cool night air.
“Come on,” Arthur said gruffly. He glanced down at his phone and down the street. “I see our Uber approaching.”
It was a quiet car ride back to their flat. Merlin made several attempts to start a conversation, trying everything from telling Arthur how nice his friends were to throwing teasing barbs about how Arthur was too good to take the tube home. No matter what he said, Arthur only gave short responses and grunts in return, leaving Merlin slightly confused and more than a little bewildered. Eventually, he gave up and resigned himself to staring out the window until the car rolled to a stop.
When they were back inside, Merlin asked, exasperated, “What’s with you?”
“Nothing,” Arthur muttered, tugging sharply at his scarf, making the ends snap in his face as he pulled it away from his neck.
Merlin raised a skeptical eyebrow. “Right… Did you not have a good time with your friends? They all seemed very nice.”
Arthur grunted in a noncommittal way. Merlin sighed. Maybe it wasn’t worth the battle.
Abruptly, Arthur said, “What did Gwaine say to you?”
“What?” Merlin asked, wracking his brain to figure out what conversation Arthur was talking about. “When?”
Arthur popped open the top two buttons of his shirt. He bent his head, fumbling with the buttons at his cuffs until Merlin came forward and unbuttoned them for him. One corner of his lips turned up in thanks, and Arthur said, “Just before we left.”
Merlin hummed distractedly as he watched Arthur roll up his sleeves, exposing toned forearms. Heart racing, he licked his lips involuntarily. “Oh, that? Gwaine being Gwaine, I expect. It was something about how if I ever get tired of you, I know where to find him.”
Arthur froze mid-step. He whirled around so fast Merlin jumped. “He said what?”
“That I should – “
“I heard you!” Arthur snapped. His fists were clenched at his sides, and he stalked back to stand in front of Merlin.
“Arthur?” Merlin asked uncertainly, leaning in to peer at Arthur’s stormy expression.
“The man doesn’t know when to give it a rest.” In one swift unexpected motion, Arthur lunged forward and crashed their lips together.
The suddenness of the movement had Merlin’s lips parting around a gasp, giving Arthur the perfect chance to lick into his mouth. Merlin tripped backward, but Arthur’s arms were there to steady him, one hand at the back of his head cushioning his fall against the front door, the other around his waist, holding him up and pressing him tight to Arthur’s chest.
Arthur’s tongue tangled with Merlin’s, and with a groan, Merlin’s eyes fluttered shut, his hands coming up to grip Arthur’s hips. Arthur’s mouth was demanding, leaving Merlin no choice but to follow his lead as he nipped and sucked until Merlin knew his lips would be swollen for hours to come. Arthur’s mood was bewildering, but it sent a thrill through Merlin that curled into a simmering heat low in his belly. His cock swelled, and he felt Arthur’s answering hardness against his thigh.
Merlin panted as Arthur drew his lips in a featherlight touch down his neck and across his collarbone, ending with teeth grazing his skin. He felt the sharp pressure of Arthur’s lips sucking at the juncture of his neck and shoulder.
“Arthur,” Merlin whined, hands spasming against Arthur’s hips. That was going to leave a mark.
Arthur lifted lust-darkened blue eyes to Merlin’s. “Problem?” Arthur said huskily, palming Merlin’s cock.
Merlin drew in a trembling breath and shook his head. “None,” he said hoarsely, mesmerized by the heat in Arthur’s gaze. When Arthur smirked and dove back down to continue peppering nips and licks across Merlin’s neck and collarbones, Merlin let his head fall back against the door with a thunk, stunned by the realization he liked it.
Swept away in the sensations, Merlin could do little more than moan and let Arthur arrange his limbs as he pleased. Arthur seemed determined to drive him crazy, and every time he tried to reach for Arthur’s cock or undress him, Arthur growled and pushed his hands away, distracting him with all the tricks he’d learned about Merlin’s body.
It was immensely unfair. In the most delightful way.
Before Merlin knew it, he was naked while Arthur was still fully clothed, albeit with trousers hanging open, shoved partway down his thighs. The sleeves of Arthur’s white button-up shirt were rolled up to his elbows, and the hem of his shirt was rucked up, leaving his hard and leaking cock jutting out and straining toward Merlin.
With a whimper, Merlin reached out to touch. His fingers had barely grazed Arthur’s cock before he was batted away. Arthur swallowed Merlin’s whine and crowded him against the door, their cocks sliding together, making Merlin arch his back and buck his hips.
Arthur buried his face in Merlin’s neck, panting Merlin’s name as he wrapped his fingers around both their cocks and stroked.
“Fuck,” Merlin moaned, writhing in the small space he had between Arthur’s chest and the door. “I don’t know what’s gotten into you today, but we should do this more often.”
Arthur’s chuckle dissolved into a moan as he twisted his wrist on an upward stroke. “Yeah, yeah,” Arthur said hoarsely.
Merlin fisted his hands in the back of Arthur’s shirt and wrapped a leg around Arthur’s waist, rubbing their cocks together, making them both groan and shudder. “Glad we can agree on something,” Merlin gasped. “But right now, I really need you to fuck me.”
Arthur’s breath hitched, and he stumbled away. Knees gone weak, Merlin started to slide down, but he managed to catch himself with fingers scrabbling against the door. He glared at Arthur where he stood rummaging through his coat pockets.
“Priorities?” Merlin snapped.
Arthur ignored him, muttering something that sounded like, “I know it’s here somewhere.”
“Arthur!”
Arthur spun around with a triumphant look on his face and a small packet held aloft in his right hand.
Merlin squinted at the packet and barked an incredulous laugh. “Are you telling me you carry packets of lube in your coat pockets?”
Arthur shrugged and tore it open, spreading the lube liberally over his fingers. “Sometimes. Admittedly, this time, I wanted to be prepared if we ended up having bathroom sex in the pub.”
Merlin blinked in surprise and yelped when Arthur caught him off guard by tucking a hand under Merlin’s knee and lifting his leg to wrap back around Arthur’s waist. Merlin’s hands flew up to clutch at Arthur’s shoulders for balance. “A little warning would be nice,” Merlin grumbled.
Arthur smirked. “Don’t pretend you didn’t know where this was going. You asked for it, remember?”
Merlin snorted. He had a retort on the tip of his tongue, but it died in his throat when Arthur cupped his arse and circled his hole with a lubed finger. Arthur pressed a slick finger inside, and a shaky moan spilled from Merlin’s mouth. As Arthur added another finger, Merlin’s eyes fluttered shut, mouth hanging open in a desperate pant.
“Awfully presumptuous of you to assume we’d be having bathroom sex with your friends right there,” Merlin gasped, trying to keep his wits about him as Arthur’s fingers threatened to drive him insane.
“Are you saying you wouldn’t have said yes?” Arthur murmured silkily.
Merlin’s eyes snapped open. He narrowed his eyes at Arthur, mouth opening around the word “no” until Arthur curled his fingers just right, brushing against Merlin’s prostate once, twice, three times, making Merlin lose all ability to think. All he could manage was a series of breathless moans as he trembled in Arthur’s arms, writhing on fingers that were relentless in assaulting all his sensitive spots.
“Fuck me already then,” Merlin practically snarled, forcing Arthur closer with the leg around his waist.
“Gladly,” Arthur groaned. He spread the remainder of the lube over his cock and pushed into Merlin slowly. So slowly he had Merlin begging for Arthur to fuck him harder, faster, now.
Merlin clutched at Arthur’s shirt and shouted himself hoarse as Arthur pounded into him, adjusting his angle to hit Merlin’s prostate over and over. It didn’t take long before Merlin was coming without another touch on his cock, his come splattering his chest and Arthur’s rumpled shirt. With a shuddering breath, Arthur buried his face in Merlin’s neck, his hips jerking as he followed Merlin over the edge.
They slumped against the door, and when Arthur slipped out of him, Merlin let his leg drop back to the ground. By mutual silent agreement, they stumbled their way across the living room to the bathroom to wipe themselves off. Once clean and naked, Merlin crawled into bed and watched through half-lidded eyes as Arthur stripped out of the rest of his clothes, wrinkling his nose at the mess they’d made of his shirt.
Merlin suppressed a chuckle as Arthur balled up the shirt and tossed it into the laundry pile. “You’re washing that tomorrow,” Merlin said.
“I don’t know if that’s fair,” Arthur said, pursing his lips, eyes twinkling with mischief. “You’re the one who made the mess.”
Merlin snorted, shifting to make room for Arthur beside him. “And whose fault is it I couldn’t undress you?”
“Maybe you just didn’t try hard enough,” was Arthur’s muffled response as he flopped into bed. An arm snaked around Merlin’s waist, pulling him into the circle of Arthur’s arms.
Merlin snuggled back into the warmth with a smile on his lips. “Not that I’m complaining, but what’s got into you today?”
Arthur tensed. In a feigned casual tone, Arthur said, “I’m pretty sure I’m the one that got into you today.”
Merlin jabbed his elbow into Arthur’s side. “Come on, don’t deflect.”
Arthur huffed and tightened his hold around Merlin’s waist. “It’s nothing. Gwaine just got on my nerves.”
“Gwaine?”
“The way he kept coming onto you,” Arthur grumbled.
A laugh bubbled up in Merlin’s chest, but he forced it down, instinctively knowing by the vulnerable undercurrent in Arthur’s tone it wouldn’t be a welcome reaction. Merlin rested a hand over Arthur’s on his belly. “I thought that’s how Gwaine is?” Merlin asked softly.
Arthur snorted. “Yeah, it is. He took it too far today. He’s interested in you, you know.”
Merlin was surprised. He smiled and tangled his fingers with Arthur’s, secretly touched Arthur cared. “I’m not though. Interested, I mean. You know that, right?”
Arthur’s hold relaxed. It was such a small movement Merlin would have missed it had he not been pressed tightly to Arthur’s body. “I do now,” he murmured.
--
Merlin received an unexpected call from Gwen late in the afternoon.
“Merlin?” came Gwen’s frustrated voice.
“Hi, Gwen,” Merlin said, tucking his phone against his shoulder as he finished typing a sentence. “You all right?”
Gwen huffed. “I got locked out. I left my purse in the car this morning, which is at work with Lance, and he won’t be able to leave for hours. Do you mind bringing over my spare key?”
Merlin hummed sympathetically, already shutting his laptop and rising to his feet. “Of course, I’ll be right over.”
Gwen heaved a grateful sigh. “Thanks, you’re the best, Merlin.”
When Merlin arrived at Gwen’s block of flats, he let himself into her building and jogged up the stairs. He rounded the corner to find Gwen leaning against her door, scowling down at her phone. Her head shot up when he jingled the keys in his hand.
A smile lit up Gwen’s face, and she bounded over. “Thank god!” Snatching the keys from Merlin, she spun to unlock the door. “I’ve been dying to pee since I got home.”
Gwen threw open the door and rushed to the bathroom, leaving Merlin to follow her in and close the door behind him with a chuckle. When she returned, Merlin was perched on the couch, chin propped on his hand, an amused smile on his lips.
“No wonder you sounded so frustrated on the phone,” he teased.
Gwen rolled her eyes. “Oh, shut up. I would’ve gone somewhere else, but I knew you wouldn’t be long.”
Merlin patted Gwen’s arm. “Always knew that spare key you gave me would come in handy one day.”
“It was a lifesaver,” Gwen agreed. She checked the time and went to peek in the fridge. “Why don’t you stay for dinner, Merlin?” she called over her shoulder.
“Oh, don’t worry about me.” Merlin waved a hand dismissively. “I can eat when I get home.”
“Nonsense,” Gwen said, pulling out a covered dish. “You saved me from wandering the streets until Lance got home, least I could do is feed you. Anyways, you’d be doing me a favor in keeping me company, Lance won’t be home until late.”
Merlin considered it and nodded with a cheeky smile. “You’ve talked me into it. Arthur’s working late today too.”
Gwen bit her lip, seemingly holding back a smile. “Mhmm,” she hummed. Before Merlin could ask, Gwen said, “I’m going to pop this lasagna in the oven, and we can eat when it comes out.”
“Sounds amazing,” Merlin said, flopping back against the couch cushions. He dug his phone out of his pocket and tapped out a quick text to Arthur to let him know where he was.
Moments later, his phone buzzed with a response. ’Poor Gwen. Have fun, see you later tonight then.’
The couch dipped beside Merlin, and Gwen leaned over to sneak a look at his phone screen. “Texting Arthur?” Gwen said, a teasing glint in her eye.
Merlin tucked the phone back in his pocket. Puzzled, he said, “Yes? What’s with the face?”
“Oh, nothing. How’s it been going with him?”
“Good,” Merlin said, an unconscious smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “I never knew I could get on so well with such a posh prat.”
Gwen stifled a snort. “I was surprised too when I met him. But he’s actually rather sweet, isn’t he?”
“He is,” Merlin agreed. “He even invited me out to meet his friends about a week ago.”
Gwen’s eyes went wide. “Did he?”
Merlin shot Gwen an odd look. “Why the surprise? He met you lot.”
“Sure, but that was a special occasion. I was a little surprised you invited him, but you called him your friend. It made sense.”
“You were surprised I invited him?”
Gwen looked flustered. “Not in a bad way,” she said. “We’ve never included anyone else in your book release celebrations. I didn’t think your hookup buddy would be one to make the cut.”
“We’re friends with benefits!”
“Right, yes,” Gwen said placatingly. “I didn’t mean anything by it, Merlin. Seeing you two together, you seemed closer than I expected.”
Merlin blinked at her. “Is that a bad thing?”
“Not a… bad thing,” Gwen said slowly. “Just a surprising thing.”
Merlin cocked his head, regarding Gwen with a frown. Before he could ask any more, Gwen waved a hand in the air and changed the subject. “Now tell me about meeting Arthur’s friends. What were they like?”
Merlin narrowed his eyes at Gwen but chose to drop his earlier line of questioning. “They were nice, easy to get on with. We met up with Arthur’s sister and her husband, who’s also Arthur’s childhood friend, and two of Arthur’s friends from uni. They all seemed close, so I sat and listened and laughed along most of the time.”
Gwen made a sympathetic sound. “That sounds like it couldn’t have been much fun then.”
“No, no,” Merlin was quick to correct. “I had a nice time. They were all very, erm… welcoming.” He could feel the flush high on his cheeks, and he deliberately avoided Gwen’s gaze.
“And by that you mean…?” she said teasingly.
Merlin gave an embarrassed laugh, rubbing the back of his neck with a hand. “One of Arthur’s friends from uni was kind of flirting with me all night.”
Gwen laughed and gave Merlin’s shoulder a shove. “You’re always such a charmer.”
Merlin turned wide, betrayed eyes on her. “I am not! I didn’t even do anything!”
Gwen jabbed a finger in Merlin’s face, making him blink and reel back. “That! That is what I am talking about! You make your adorable faces with those big, puppy-dog eyes and think people won’t fall in love with you.”
Merlin’s jaw dropped. His mouth flapped soundlessly before he found his voice again. “It didn’t work on you,” he pointed out, huffing as if that proved Gwen was wrong.
Gwen rolled her eyes. “Oh, don’t pretend you didn’t know I had a crush on you in uni. For a few weeks back when we first met.”
Merlin’s eyes went huge. “You had what?” he squeaked.
Gwen arched an eyebrow, folding her arms and crossing her legs. “You’re kidding. You actually didn’t know?”
Merlin shook his head violently. “Lance is going to kill me.”
Gwen smacked Merlin on the arm. “Don’t be ridiculous, Lance is far too nice for that. Besides, he loves you just as much as I do.”
“Well, I certainly hope not quite as much as you do…” Merlin trailed off, smirking and waggling his eyebrows suggestively.
“Merlin!” Gwen yelped. She buried her face in her hands to suppress her giggles. “You’re a menace.”
“I thought I was charming.”
“That you are,” Gwen said, peering up at Merlin and returning his grin. “And that’s why I’m telling you I’m not surprised Arthur’s friend liked you too.”
“It’s not like it matters,” Merlin said with a roll of his eyes.
“It doesn’t?” Gwen asked, curious. She pulled her legs up to stretch them lengthwise on the couch between them. “So, what did Arthur think about all the flirting? Wait, did you flirt back?”
“Of course, I didn’t flirt back!”
“Of course?”
“Why do you keep asking all these odd questions?” Merlin groused.
Gwen pursed her lips. “You didn’t answer my other question. What did Arthur think?”
Merlin couldn’t help the blush that spread across his cheeks as he recalled Arthur’s reaction once they arrived home. He cleared his throat and said vaguely, “Arthur didn’t seem to love it.”
Gwen tapped Merlin’s thigh with her foot. “Explain.”
“What’s there to say?” Merlin said, shrugging. “If what I was told is to be believed, that’s how Gwaine – that’s his name – is with everyone. Arthur just got a little defensive and snippy about it.”
“Is that all?” Gwen asked. “Because I don’t think the way you’re blushing is a coincidence.”
Merlin buried his face in his hands and groaned. “We might’ve had some really good sex that night. Thanks to how annoyed Arthur was,” he mumbled, feeling his face heat up even further.
Instead of the chortling or teasing he was expecting in response, Merlin was met with silence. He glanced up at Gwen through his fingers. Gwen was looking back at him, a tiny furrow between her brows, mouth opened in a small “o”.
“Gwen?”
Gwen’s mouth snapped shut, and her lips turned down in a tiny frown. “He sounds jealous.”
Gwen’s words were so unexpected an involuntary laugh bubbled out of Merlin. “Don’t be silly, Gwen. Arthur’s not jealous.”
“What makes you say that?”
“I mean, we’re not together,” Merlin said, surprised Gwen was asking. “What’s there to be jealous about?”
“What indeed,” Gwen murmured.
Much of the night was spent laughing and catching up over dinner. Afterwards, they sprawled on the couch together to watch a movie, splitting one, then two bottles of wine. Lance returned partway through, shoulders slumped with exhaustion. With a kiss for Gwen and a hug for Merlin, he disappeared into the bedroom, mumbling about how he needed an early night.
It wasn’t until the movie ended and Merlin rose from the couch to make his way home that he remembered he had no head for wine. With a dangerous wobble, Merlin sank back down.
Gwen, perceptive as ever, chuckled and said, “Stay the night, Merlin. The guest bed is all yours.”
Merlin rubbed his eyes and nodded. “Probably the right call. Thanks, Gwen.”
Gwen hummed and rose to her feet, much steadier than Merlin was. She ruffled Merlin’s hair before disappearing into her bedroom, reemerging with an armful of sheets and pillows. When Merlin tried to follow to help make the bed, he received a pointed look in response that had him sheepishly wobbling back to the couch.
Once Gwen and Merlin were both ready for bed, Merlin flopped onto the mattress, snuggling into the warm blankets and picking up his phone. Gwen perched on the edge of the bed and asked softly, “What is Arthur to you, Merlin?”
Merlin lifted his head from the pillow and shot Gwen a confused look. He finished tapping out a text to tell Arthur he wasn’t going to be home until morning before turning his attention back to her.
“What do you mean?” Merlin replied, brows knitting together.
“Merlin,” Gwen said, putting a hand on his arm as if calming a skittish animal. “Please don't take this the wrong way, but you’ve always had a bit of a blind spot when it comes to the men you date - “
“I’m not dating Arthur!” Merlin interjected.
“ - and I worry you’re going to get your heart broken again,” Gwen finished.
“I’m not dating Arthur,” Merlin repeated.
Gwen shot him a searching look. “But you live together now,” she pointed out.
“Well, yeah, because it’s convenient,” Merlin said, feeling as if Gwen was completely missing the point. “He ends up in my bed almost every night anyways, why not call it his bed too at that point?”
Gwen huffed in exasperation. “And you see nothing wrong with that?”
“What’s wrong with it?” Merlin asked, bewildered. “It’s called being friends with benefits.”
“You keep saying that, but I really don't think that's what people mean when they say they have a friends with benefits,” Gwen shot back.
Merlin couldn’t help but laugh. “Oh, Gwen,” he said fondly. “I’m pretty sure you’re not the leading expert on what friends with benefits means. You and Lance have been together since uni, and before that, you hadn’t even had a fumble with anyone else.”
“Always discounting my experience,” Gwen sniffed. “I’ll bet I've had more sex than any of you.”
“Oh, I don’t doubt it. We were flatmates in uni, Gwen, I’m not deaf.” Merlin grinned wolfishly.
Gwen’s cheeks flushed bright red. “See if I try to help you again," she muttered.
Merlin sat up and threw an arm around Gwen in a one-armed hug. “C’mon, Gwen, you don’t have to worry about me. I can take care of myself.” He flashed his best winning smile.
Gwen looked unconvinced. “Just be careful, Merlin,” she sighed. “You and Arthur are getting into blurry territory. He’s a sweet bloke, I can see why you like him, but there’ve been other sweet blokes who’ve hurt you.”
“Thanks, Gwen,” Merlin said softly, tipping his head against hers. He knew she worried because she cared. “But I promise I know what I’m doing.”
Gwen gave Merlin a reluctant nod followed by a warm smile. She ruffled Merlin’s hair, straightened, and got to her feet. “I’m off to bed, Lance is probably wondering what’s taking me so long. You should get some sleep too.”
“Night, Gwen,” Merlin murmured, sliding back under the covers and grabbing his phone.
“Night, Merlin.” Gwen flicked off the light, smiling a little when Merlin gave her a little wave with his phone as she slipped out.
Merlin idly tapped his phone screen, unlocking it to look at his texts.
’Hope you had fun with Gwen and that her guest bed is more comfortable than your damn couch,’ was the first text from Arthur.
Only a minute ago, there was a second text. ’Off to bed for me, see you tomorrow.’
Merlin clicked his screen off and set the phone on the bedside table. ’I’m not dating Arthur,’ he thought. But there was no helping the smile lingering on his face as he fell asleep.
--
Merlin realized he might be dating Arthur. Just a little bit.
It had been several weeks since his conversation with Gwen. Arthur stormed into the flat in a whirlwind, the door slamming shut behind him.
Merlin paused with his fork halfway to his mouth, having just sat down for a late dinner. “Bad night?”
Arthur glared and snapped, “Clearly.” Angrily, he tore at his jacket and scarf, only succeeding in making a tangled mess of both.
Merlin made a sympathetic sound and rose from the kitchen table. Of course, Merlin already knew what was wrong – Arthur had been furiously texting him about his dinner with his father his entire car ride home.
“He’ll come around,” Merlin said soothingly. He gently pried Arthur’s hands away from the scarf.
Arthur deflated under Merlin’s touch, but still scoffed, “Will he?”
Merlin found the ends of the scarf and, loop by loop, patiently worked it free. With a small flourish and a twirl, he pulled it away from Arthur’s neck and tossed it over the coat rack.
He considered it a win when the corners of Arthur’s lips quirked upward. As Merlin worked at the buttons on Arthur's coat, he said, “He can’t make you do anything you don’t want to do, Arthur.”
“That’s certainly not what he thinks,” Arthur said sullenly, but didn’t protest when Merlin pushed the jacket off his shoulders. “He’s never pushed this hard for me to get married before. He’s always throwing women at me – daughters of his business associates. But this one, you should’ve seen her! Simpering after my father like he’s the bloody king! Couldn’t string a sentence together that didn't start with ‘Oh, Arthur’ and end with ‘that’s lovely’. You would’ve torn her to pieces when she started going on about how blue my eyes are.”
Merlin choked back a laugh. “I’m sure your father meant well.”
Arthur snorted. “My father does not mean well, Merlin. My father wants to marry me off to the daughter of the most influential man he can to ‘secure Camelot’s future’. It’s not like he's ever believed I could hold down the family business on my own merit.”
“But you can, and you will, Arthur,” Merlin said earnestly. “All you have to do is prove him wrong.”
Merlin took Arthur’s hand and led him to the bedroom, gesturing for Arthur to strip out of his shirt and trousers. He slipped into bed, leaning back against two propped pillows and beckoning Arthur closer with an outstretched arm.
Arthur smiled softly, studying Merlin from across the room. He kicked his trousers aside, and obediently crawled into bed, laying his cheek on Merlin’s chest. Merlin wrapped an arm around Arthur’s shoulders, his hand rubbing up and down Arthur’s arm. With his free hand, Merlin smoothed his fingers through Arthur’s ruffled hair.
Arthur gave a small sigh of contentment and turned his face into Merlin’s chest. “Thanks,” he murmured. “I don’t know why I let him get to me so much.”
Merlin shrugged and said, “He’s your father,” as if that explained everything. “You just want him to be proud of you.”
“Yeah,” Arthur sighed. After a beat, he repeated listlessly, “Yeah.”
The silence stretched on until Arthur tried to crack a joke. “Was this a ploy to get me into bed?” He made a half-hearted grab at Merlin’s arse for good measure.
Merlin chuckled but shook his head. “No, you prat. I just wanted to make you feel better.”
A small smile flitted across Arthur’s lips. “Thanks,” he murmured.
“Is that why you didn’t stay at your old flat?” Merlin asked. “For the sex?”
“No, it was a shitty day," came Arthur’s muffled response. Quieter, he added, “Just wanted to see you.”
Merlin was entirely unprepared for the flood of warmth in his chest at Arthur’s admission. Merlin swallowed, willing his heart to stop racing. “I’m glad,” he eventually managed.
’Shit. Gwen might’ve been on to something.’
--
Merlin woke with Arthur half lying on top of him, his leg slotted between Arthur’s. Somewhere between one murmured comforting word and the next, they must’ve fallen asleep. Not that waking up in a tangle of limbs with Arthur was an uncommon occurrence, but this had felt different somehow. With a melancholy but pliant Arthur pressed to his side, last night had felt intimate in a way sex never had.
In the dim morning light, Merlin studied Arthur’s face, where it was half-smushed into the pillow. An involuntary smile tugged at Merlin’s lips.
On the infrequent occasions Merlin woke before Arthur, he rarely let Arthur sleep for long, preferring to wake him for a round of morning sex. But Merlin was not in the headspace for that, and after the night Arthur had, he suspected sex wasn’t the first thing on Arthur’s mind either.
Merlin stared at the ceiling, wondering when they had fallen into enough of a routine he could say which of them woke first on a weekend morning. He didn’t mind exactly, one could even say he was pleased. The level of comfort and ease between him and Arthur had snuck up on Merlin, and it unsettled him.
Merlin shook his head sharply and disentangled himself. As gently as possible, he slipped out of bed, trying not to disturb Arthur. With one last glance over his shoulder, he padded out of the bedroom, careful to shut the door behind him quietly.
In a daze, Merlin wandered to the kitchen. His hands gripped the edge of the counter, bracing himself against a wave of dizziness accompanying his revelations. Merlin leaned heavily against the counter, squeezing his eyes shut and gulping in lungfuls of air to quell his rising panic.
This wasn't how it was supposed to be. He and Arthur were friends with benefits. Friends with benefits that shared a flat. There weren't meant to be feelings involved.
After all, Arthur didn’t do relationships, and Merlin had been burned one too many times. Friends with benefits was good, friends with benefits was easy.
’I’m not dating Arthur,’ he repeated in his head.
Merlin opened his eyes, casting a sideways glance at the still-closed bedroom door. ’But would dating Arthur be so bad?’ a small voice asked from inside his head.
Merlin ignored the thought, instead opting to grab a pan and a carton of eggs from the fridge. He cracked four eggs into the pan and grabbed a loaf of bread, popping four slices into the toaster.
As the eggs cooked, Merlin stared blankly into the pan, chewing absently on a nail. He had no idea when these newfound feelings had crept up on him. He and Arthur had become friends, there was no question about that, but that was the friends part of friends with benefits, right?
Merlin slid the eggs onto a plate, turned up the heat on the burner, and threw down a couple of slices of bacon to fry.
So what if he and Arthur spent an awful lot of time together outside of sex? So what if Arthur wanted to see him after a bad day? So what if Arthur’s smile made Merlin’s stomach do some kind of weird flip-flop when his hair caught the sun just right?
Merlin gave the bacon a vicious prod with the spatula.
“Merlin?”
Merlin jumped, fumbling the spatula and making the slice of bacon do a jump and a flip, sending little droplets of grease flying. He hissed as a couple landed on his hand. Cool fingers touched his arm, and Merlin looked up to find Arthur at his side.
“Sorry, sorry, are you all right?” Arthur asked, eyes alert and sweeping over Merlin’s arm, assessing him for injuries.
“I’m fine,” Merlin said, fighting a swell of affection for the man beside him. Tugging his arm away, Merlin reached over to turn on the faucet, sighing in relief when he stuck his hand under the cold stream of water. “Just startled, I thought you were asleep.”
“The bacon smell woke me,” Arthur said sheepishly.
Merlin snorted a laugh, giving Arthur a nudge toward the fridge. Arthur made a face at him but obediently grabbed the milk and poured two glasses. Humming under his breath, Arthur wandered around the kitchen, pulling out utensils to set the table.
When Merlin lifted a slice of bacon from the pan, Arthur was there, handing him a plate as he passed. The toaster went off, and again, Arthur was there, plucking out the toast and dropping slices onto the plates half-filled with eggs and bacon.
Suddenly, in the span of a heartbeat, Merlin could see thousands of mornings like this stretched out ahead of them, a future he’d never given any thought to before. Merlin was struck with an unexpected pang of longing, an ache for a life he hadn’t known he wanted, but now knew with a certainty he couldn't bear to lose.
Merlin sat down at the table across from Arthur, outwardly nodding calmly at Arthur’s early morning ramblings, and inwardly going quietly insane over what he was going to do.
--
With Gwen’s words echoing in his ears, Merlin began to pay more attention. Nothing had changed between him and Arthur, but Merlin was forced to admit to himself he treated Arthur like a lover, not as a friend. And… perhaps he wasn’t the only one.
Little by little, Merlin was noticing things Arthur did for him that, when put together, painted a picture beyond friendship.
Perhaps it was the ease with which Merlin could fall into a routine with a partner, more used to living with a boyfriend than a friend, that had allowed him to stay willfully ignorant of their dynamic.
Even from the first weeks of their living together, Arthur had taken care of Merlin in ways he would never expect from a friend. At first, stress relief had seemed like a convenient excuse for sex at all hours when Arthur was distracting him with his mouth on Merlin’s or a hand on his cock. But looking back, it was blindingly obvious Arthur had been doing it for him, giving Merlin what he needed, whether it was to lose himself in the pleasure of Arthur’s skillful hands and tongue or to take control and make Arthur fall apart. Whether it was one or the other, or anywhere in between, Arthur had obliged enthusiastically.
If that had been the only sign, Merlin would have brushed off Gwen’s words without a second thought. But Merlin also remembered gentle fingers in his hair, coaxing him awake with such patience, only to usher him off to bed for a good night’s sleep. Merlin remembered arms around him, cradling him against a firm, muscled chest on nights when he was being particularly difficult.
With a rising blush, Merlin remembered the many nights when he’d asked Arthur sleepily if he was coming to bed. At the time – mind hazy with exhaustion and the cocoon of blankets lulling him to sleep – it hadn’t struck him as odd Arthur’s answer had always been “yes”, regardless of the hour. Now, with the benefit of hindsight, the memory left Merlin with a warmth spreading in his chest, wondering how he’d missed it before.
--
Arthur woke with a groan. His entire body ached. Where the hell had he fallen asleep, on a bag of rocks? He blinked his eyes open, and Merlin’s living room came into focus. “Merlin,” Arthur whined, rolling off the couch. Of course it was the god-awful couch.
“Arthur?” Merlin poked his head out his office door. When he saw Arthur standing in front of the couch, trying in vain to stretch his back, his face morphed into an expression of sympathy. “Did you fall asleep?”
Merlin emerged from his office and made a gesture Arthur understood to be an offer to rub his back. He wasn’t about to turn that down. Arthur grabbed Merlin’s hand and dragged him into the bedroom where he flopped onto the bed dramatically.
“That couch will be the death of me one day,” Arthur lamented, sulking until Merlin climbed onto the bed, straddled his legs, and started to knead the muscles in his back.
Unhelpful as always, Merlin said, “I always tell you not to take a nap there.”
“Yes, but Merlin, it’s a couch. It exists to be used. If I can’t even close my eyes for twenty minutes on there, what’s the point of it?” Arthur huffed.
“It’s still good for other things!”
“Like sitting on?” Arthur retorted. “Then why don’t we ever sit on it? Or perhaps you mean for sex? Do you not remember the one and only time we tried that? It was so terrible we couldn't even finish and ended up doing it on the rug instead. On the floor.”
Merlin made an indignant noise.
“I don't know why you're so attached to it,” Arthur muttered.
“I’m really not,” Merlin admitted. “At first, I couldn't be bothered to look for a new one when I was the only one using it. And now, er, it’s been a little entertaining watching you complain about it.”
“Excuse me?” Arthur cried. “So you’ve just been enjoying my suffering?”
Merlin stifled a laugh. “I did say it was only a little entertaining.”
Arthur pouted and shot Merlin a glare. “That’s it,” he declared. “I’m buying you a new couch. Today.”
“Arthur, you really don’t - “
“Today, Merlin,” Arthur said darkly.
Merlin narrowed his eyes, staring Arthur down in challenge. Arthur wasn’t fazed – he stared back resolutely until Merlin scowled and gave in. Satisfied, Arthur laid his head back down on his hands and wriggled for Merlin to resume his massaging.
Much to Arthur’s disappointment, Merlin only continued his ministrations for a few more minutes before he announced his hands were tired and flopped down on the bed. Arthur rolled his shoulders and twisted his back, testing for soreness. The aches had mostly subsided – it was only a short nap – so he shrugged and accepted it.
Turning onto his side, Arthur snaked out an arm to pull Merlin into his chest. Merlin squirmed, searching for a comfortable position until he settled with a small, contented sigh. After that, it was Arthur’s turn to shift, Merlin’s squirming having made a certain part of him perk up. Slyly, Merlin threw his head back to meet Arthur’s gaze and deliberately rolled his hips.
Arthur groaned, gripping Merlin’s hip tightly to hold him in place. “Merlin,” Arthur said warningly. “I told you we’re going couch shopping.”
Merlin blinked at him, all wide-eyed innocence. “But it’s only three o’clock, we have plenty of time,” he said coyly, still managing to rub his arse against Arthur’s cock.
Arthur choked back a moan. Trying to pre-empt Merlin’s teasing, he shoved Merlin onto his back and swung a leg over him, pinning Merlin’s wrists above his head.
In response, Merlin smirked and lifted his hips, rubbing their cocks together through too-thin material.
“Damn it, Merlin,” Arthur said through gritted teeth. It was all he could do to refrain from rutting back against Merlin. “You’ll keep me here all day if I let you, I’m telling you we’re not doing this now.”
Merlin pouted but stilled. “Are you picking a couch over sex with me?”
“No,” Arthur snapped. “But that couch needs to go and if we don’t go to the store today, we won’t be able to go until next weekend. By that point, I’ll have hurt myself on it three more times, and avoiding that is worth putting off sex for a couple of hours!”
Merlin perked up. “A couple of hours?”
Arthur fought back a smile. Merlin was insatiable sometimes. He covered Merlin’s body with his own, leaning down to nip at Merlin's earlobe, whispering, “If we leave now, I’ll make you beg me to fuck you into the mattress in a couple of hours.”
Arthur smirked at Merlin’s answering moan. “What are waiting for then?” Merlin asked breathlessly.
--
Arthur whisked Merlin off to a furniture store near his old flat. The store was impressively posh – a bit like Arthur. Merlin stepped into a huge, open room with high ceilings, plush carpeting, and sprawling displays.
A flurry of salespeople descended on them. “Welcome, sir!” one of the women chirped. “Is there anything you’re looking for today? Might we offer you a tour?”
Arthur flashed his most charming smile, and two of the saleswomen nearly swooned. Merlin stifled a snort, looking down at his shoes to hide his eye roll.
“We’re here looking for a couch,” Arthur said. “If you could please point us in the right direction, we’ll be fine on our own.”
“Certainly, sir!” the woman trilled. “Right this way.”
The woman kept up an endless stream of chatter as she led them through the maze of furniture. One after another, she flung cleverly disguised sales pitches at Arthur, barely sparing Merlin a glance. Amused, Merlin tuned her out. It was abundantly clear which of them could afford to shop here, and Merlin wasn’t going to pretend it was him.
Arthur nodded along with feigned interest, but when the woman showed no signs of stopping, Arthur said politely, “Thank you, miss, but perhaps you could leave us to browse on our own?”
With a tinkling laugh and renewed reassurances she would be only a shout away, the woman retreated to the front of the store. Once she was out of earshot, Merlin and Arthur let out simultaneous sighs of relief.
Exchanging a grin with Arthur, Merlin said, “Well, that was exhausting.”
Arthur grimaced. “Par for the course, I’m afraid. I promise you the furniture here is top quality though.”
Merlin glanced around. He smoothed a hand down the back of an unassuming-looking brown couch, whistling through his teeth at the softness of the material. “I can see that.”
Catching the tag between two fingers, Merlin flipped it over to look at the price. His eyes widened, and he snatched his hand away as if burned. “Arthur,” Merlin hissed. “These are all far too expensive for my flat. Can’t we go somewhere else? IKEA maybe?”
Arthur rolled his eyes and tucked his hands in his pockets. “Merlin, don’t be ridiculous. You get what you pay for. The furniture here is long-lasting and comfortable, which is more than can be said for anything at IKEA. Besides, I’m paying.”
“Not all of us need to sit on the finest silks and leathers in all the land,” Merlin sniffed.
Arthur barked a laugh. “Now, that would be expensive,” he said, eyes twinkling with mirth. “But, for better or for worse, that is not what you’ll find here. So pick one.”
“Arthur,” Merlin said, apprehensive. “I’m serious, I don’t need a couch from here. I’m perfectly capable of affording a nice couch on my own.”
Arthur’s eyes softened. “I know you are,” he said, taking a step into Merlin’s space and stroking a palm down his arm. “But I want to do this for you, and money’s no object. So let me, please?”
One look at Arthur’s earnest expression and Merlin’s resolve crumbled. How could he say no to that face? “Fine, where do we start?” he sighed.
Arthur’s smile lit up his whole face.
They sat on couch after couch – firm ones and soft ones, long ones and short ones, ones made of any and every kind of material, from leather to velvet to linen. When it came to agreeing on one to buy, Merlin and Arthur found themselves at an impasse. Arthur’s taste tended toward the lavish, and Merlin’s quite the opposite.
Arthur pointed at a fine leather couch that couldn’t look more opulent if it was studded with diamonds. “Merlin, what about this one? It’s lovely and comfortable.”
Merlin didn’t sit down. “Oh, yes, the top-grain leather will look perfect next to the coffee table from my uni days,” he said dryly.
Arthur huffed in annoyance, but his expression turned thoughtful. He wandered away, mumbling something too low for Merlin to hear. After their many differences in opinion, Merlin chose to accept the tiny victory.
He was in the middle of examining a white linen couch when Arthur returned, excitedly ushering him towards an array of beige couches. Without giving him a chance to comment, Arthur shoved Merlin down onto the nearest one.
Plopping down beside him, Arthur asked hopefully, “Well?”
Merlin stroked the fabric and bounced lightly on the cushions. “It’s nice,” he admitted.
“I think so too,” Arthur beamed.
Merlin leaned over the armrest to pick up the price tag. “Arthur,” Merlin squawked. “This is part of a collection that includes three couches, a coffee table, and end tables!”
To Arthur’s credit, he looked only slightly smug when he said, “I solved your matching problem.”
“I do not need a whole living room set!” Merlin whispered furiously, barely refraining from stomping his foot in frustration.
“Merlin,” Arthur said with exaggerated patience. “The living room could be much more comfortable if you would fill it with furniture. Besides, you know your coffee table has seen better days, and this glass one is really quite nice.” Arthur tapped a finger on the low table in front of them.
“I agreed to a single couch! What’s wrong with the blue one I liked over there?” Merlin jabbed a finger toward the long, plush, blue sofa sitting on the other side of the showroom they had argued about half an hour ago.
“There’s nothing wrong with it,” Arthur said, shrugging. “But there are much nicer ones, why settle for just the one?”
“Well, we’re not getting the whole collection of furniture you’re advocating for.” Merlin folded his arms across his chest, leveling a stubborn look at Arthur.
The disagreement swiftly devolved into a series of shoves and grabs ending with Merlin in Arthur’s lap. After too many breathless giggles and a handful of stolen kisses, Merlin slid off Arthur to perch on the opposite end of the beige couch, his previous frustration forgotten.
Their compromise was a nice gray sectional that was both unassuming and high quality. By the time it was brought into the flat, Merlin begrudgingly admitted it looked quite nice in the space. Internally, he conceded Arthur might not have been entirely wrong when he said a new coffee table would have complemented it nicely. But that was something for Merlin to ponder and not for Arthur to gloat over.
Later that night, when Arthur fucked Merlin over the back of the new couch, Merlin was only too happy to shout his praise for Arthur’s brilliant idea between moans.
--
A couple of weekends later, Arthur asked, out of the blue, “Merlin, do you have any interest in football?”
Merlin glanced up from his book, shooting Arthur a cautious look from where he was curled up on the new, now usable, couch. “Watching or playing?”
“Watching.”
Merlin scrunched up his nose. “You know I’m not a football fan, but I could suffer through a game if I had to. Why?”
A smile brightened Arthur’s face. “Think you could suffer through watching my mates and I play a pickup game this Saturday?”
Merlin stared, more than a little baffled.
Arthur flushed and hastily added, “You can obviously say no if you don’t want to. I invited Lance and Elyan, so Gwen is coming along to watch. And Morgana always comes for Leon. So I thought maybe you’d like to come too?”
A rush of affection surged in Merlin’s chest – there was something impossibly endearing about the pink in Arthur’s cheeks and the way he tripped over his words. “Yeah, I’ll be there,” Merlin was saying before he’d fully processed the decision.
“Oh.” Arthur’s smile melted into something soft and private. “I’m glad.”
Merlin caught Arthur’s gaze and held it, a fragile tension hanging between them, like a held breath in a quiet room. Arthur cleared his throat and said, “Since everyone else is invited, would you like to invite Will too?”
Merlin broke away and drummed his fingers on his thigh, considering the offer. He nodded, pulling out his phone. “Yeah, he might not want to, but I’ll text him.” As he tapped out a text, he quipped, “Ogling fit blokes isn’t exactly his cup of tea.”
Merlin tilted his head back and shot Arthur a suggestive wink, making Arthur snort and swat at his arm as he walked past.
On Saturday, Merlin walked out of the bedroom to find Arthur moving through a series of warmup stretches in the middle of the living room. Leaning against the doorframe, Merlin watched as Arthur contorted his body while wearing a clingy football kit. Oh, he would like watching football just fine.
Arthur’s back was to Merlin, so he was entirely oblivious to Merlin’s ogling until he twisted his torso around in an upper body stretch. “Merlin!” he said, eyes widening in surprise. “How long have you been there?”
“Long enough.” Merlin licked his lips, delighting in Arthur’s shiver as his gaze slid down Arthur’s body. “Just enjoying the view.”
When Merlin dragged his eyes back up to Arthur’s face, Arthur was flushed, lips parted. “We don’t have time for this now,” Arthur said with a hoarse, questioning edge to his voice, as if hoping Merlin would disagree.
“You’re right,” Merlin said, stalking forward and pressing his front to Arthur’s back, his hands resting lightly on either side of Arthur’s waist.
Arthur’s breath hitched. “What are you doing then?”
Merlin brushed a chaste kiss on Arthur’s cheek. “Nothing,” he said brightly, making his way toward the door.
“Merlin!”
Merlin smirked. He turned back around, rested his palms on the back of the couch, and leaned forward. He peered up at Arthur through his lashes. “If you do well, we’ll have plenty of time later tonight.”
Arthur’s eyes darkened, and he sauntered forward, grabbing a fistful of Merlin’s shirt and yanking him forward over the couch until their chests were pressed together. “Is that a promise?”
With one hand, Merlin steadied himself, and with the other, cupped the bulge of Arthur’s cock, sliding his palm down the hard length. Arthur’s hips bucked, a whimper slipping out of his mouth.
“You bet it is,” Merlin murmured. Taking advantage of Arthur’s distraction, Merlin plucked his hand off his shirt and danced away. He jingled a set of house keys at Arthur and chirped, “Ready?”
Arthur blinked, staring at Merlin and at his empty hand. He huffed and waved a hand at the tent in his shorts. “You know very well, Merlin, that I am going to need a minute.”
Merlin responded with an innocent doe-eyed look that had Arthur growling and pouncing on him from across the room. Laughing, Merlin tried to push Arthur away with reminders they needed to be on their way. Not to be deterred, Arthur wasn’t satisfied until Merlin was a mess, glassy-eyed and panting.
They were very late to the park.
By the time Merlin and Arthur made it, they were the last to arrive, and someone had already marked out the makeshift goals. They were greeted with hugs all around before Merlin was whisked away by Morgana and Gwen. They linked arms with Merlin, one on either side of him, grinning at each other as they steered him toward a blanket spread on the grass.
Merlin raised an eyebrow. “I guess that means I won’t need to introduce you two?”
“No need,” Morgana declared, reaching across Merlin to pat Gwen’s arm. “Gwen here is a dear. We’re getting along fabulously.”
The three of them settled on the blanket, and Merlin gratefully accepted a water bottle from Gwen. They watched the men jump around, laugh, and jostle each other until two teams formed – Arthur, Leon, and Lance on one side, Gwaine, Percival, and Elyan on the other.
“So, Merlin,” Morgana said, poking Merlin in the back. “Are you a football fan?”
Gwen snorted, almost choking on a sip of water. Merlin shot her a withering look. “I’m not,” he said. “Sports have never been my thing. I’m just here for Arthur.”
Morgana hummed in agreement and exchanged a smile with Gwen. “Right, like Gwen and I are here for Lance and Leon.”
“Right,” Merlin said, eyes following Arthur’s sprint across the field.
Arthur executed a showy kick that sent the ball whooshing past Gwaine and between the goal markers. He whooped and jogged back toward his side of the field, catching Merlin’s gaze to share a grin with him.
A series of choked-off giggles came from Gwen and Morgana. Merlin tore his eyes away to look at them strangely. “Are you two all right?”
“Fine,” Gwen said, flashing an innocent smile.
Merlin was not convinced. But Morgana was sitting right beside him, and he didn’t fancy trying to pry whatever it was out of Gwen with an audience, so he had no choice but to let it go.
Gwen’s eyes flew to the field, lighting up at what she saw. Merlin swung around just in time to see Lance score a point. The three of them cheered and clapped wildly.
Basking in the afternoon warmth, Merlin spent the match laughing and joking with Gwen and Morgana, alternately complimenting and making fun of the men on the field. The three of them cheered at every goal, no matter who did the scoring.
The day took a sour turn when a high-pitched giggle sounded to their left. Merlin glanced over, finding a group of three women standing nearby, watching the football game with avid interest.
“Such fit blokes!” one of the women said, nodding toward the field with a starry-eyed expression on her face.
Gwaine was the first to notice their new spectators. He aimed a cheery wave at the women and shot them a flirtatious wink as he jogged backward to his position on the field.
Morgana snorted. “There goes Gwaine. Now they’ll never leave.”
Merlin tipped his head back to look at Morgana, finding only fond exasperation in her expression. “Has this happened before?” Merlin whispered, not wanting to draw the attention of the women.
Morgana leaned close and gestured for Merlin and Gwen to do the same. “Yeah, girls like that turn up from time to time,” she said with a roll of her eyes. “Don’t let them get to you.”
Gwen shook her head, an amused smile playing at the corners of her lips. “Oh, I’m fine. Lance won’t give them a second glance.”
Morgana nodded. “Exactly. Neither will Leon or Arthur.”
Merlin darted a glance at Arthur, pleased to find Arthur watching him instead of the women. “Right.”
“I just hope they go away soon,” Gwen added. “No one likes to be ogled.”
Merlin huffed a laugh. “What are we doing then?”
Gwen grinned and said, “Supporting our boyfriends.”
On the field, Gwaine whipped his shirt off, tossing it at Percival’s face. Not to be outdone, Arthur followed suit, which prompted a cascading reaction of all the men stripping their tops off one by one.
The three women’s eyes widened, and they swooned, leaning against each other for support. Merlin stifled a laugh and nudged Morgana, nodding at the field. “They don’t mind when this happens?”
A loud squeal came from the group. Merlin winced, and Morgana shot them an annoyed glance. “They don’t like it,” she said shortly. “But what can you do? If they don’t go away soon, I’ll chase them off. Most are polite enough to just stand and watch for a few minutes with the occasional shy giggle, then they leave on their own.”
“We’ll come with you if they don’t go,” Gwen said, frowning.
One of the women pulled out a phone and snapped a picture.
Morgana shot to her feet. “That’s too far.” She stalked over to the three women, Gwen and Merlin scrambling to follow. Morgana tapped the shoulder of the one taking the picture. “Excuse me,” she said sharply.
The woman turned to face her, a blush staining her cheeks. “Yes?”
Morgana shot her phone a pointed glance. “Do you mind?”
One of the other women piped up, “Do you mind? We’re not bothering you.”
Morgana tossed her hair and barked an incredulous laugh. “Oh, I very much mind. That’s my husband and our friends out there. It’s not nice to take pictures of strangers without their consent. You three have been standing here giggling and staring for long enough – it’s getting ridiculous.”
The three women flushed in embarrassment. The one taking the pictures opened her mouth to retort, but Lance’s voice cut her off. “Is everything all right?”
Merlin turned to see Lance at Gwen’s shoulder, the rest of their friends trailing behind him, guarded looks on their faces. Thankfully, they’d all put their shirts back on.
The woman flushed a darker red and stammered, “P-Perfectly fine. You were all brilliant.”
“Thank you,” Lance said graciously, offering a polite smile and wrapping an arm around Gwen’s shoulders.
Leon made his way to Morgana’s side, wrapping an arm around her waist. Arthur came up to Merlin and rested a hand on the small of his back.
The woman’s eyes darted around their group. “Nice to meet you all,” she muttered, before fleeing with her friends.
“That was new,” Arthur said, frowning at the women’s retreating backs.
Morgana scoffed and turned to Gwaine. “Would’ve helped if you didn’t encourage them.”
Gwaine held his hands up, palms facing Morgana. “It’s not my fault!”
“In Gwaine’s defense,” Percival said. “This isn’t the first time he’s flirted with girls like that. They’re usually not that bold.”
Elyan nodded. “It’s a public park. We can’t stop anyone from watching, but it’s rude to take a picture without asking us.”
Leon sighed, running a hand through his hair. He bent down to press a kiss to Morgana’s cheek. “Thank you for getting rid of them.”
Morgana rolled her eyes. “I think you should thank Lance for that actually. That girl wasn’t backing down until he showed up.”
“Whoever is responsible for it, we should just be glad they left,” Lance said. “Let’s not let them ruin our Saturday. Are we still playing?”
The tension dissipated and, with a series of exchanged murmurs, they all agreed to play one last round. The mood was subdued, but after one intercepted goal, the men made up for it with extra boisterousness, knocking into each other as they ran around the field.
Merlin looked on fondly, glad the playful sparkle was back in Arthur’s eyes. Even from a distance, he could feel the glee radiating off Arthur as he stole the ball out from under Gwaine’s feet and shot it into the goal. Grinning and bouncing on his toes, Arthur swung around to catch Merlin’s eye and winked, making Merlin dissolve into laughter.
“He’s showing off, you know,” Morgana said, nudging Merlin’s leg with the toe of her boot.
Merlin jumped. He glanced at Morgana, finding a half-smile on her face, her eyes flicking meaningfully between him and Arthur. “That’s a very Arthur thing to do,” Merlin said, chuckling uncertainly.
Morgana didn’t let him off that easily. “He’s showing off for you,” she emphasized.
Embarrassed, Merlin shook his head and said, “Don’t be silly.”
Morgana tsked. “I don’t think I’m the silly one.”
Merlin turned back to the field, pretending to be more engrossed in the match than he was to avoid any further prodding. He pulled his legs up to his chest and rested his chin on his knees. Merlin’s eyes tracked Arthur’s progress around the field, Morgana’s words ringing in his ears. Showing off was in Arthur’s nature, but if the way his eyes kept drifting to Merlin’s after a particularly fancy kick was any indication, there might be some truth to Morgana’s statement.
Merlin didn’t bother trying to hide the small, pleased smile that crossed his lips.
Once the game was over, the group piled into a nearby pub.
Merlin sat down beside Arthur, pulling out his phone when it buzzed in his pocket. “Will said he can drop by for an hour, then he has to head back to work,” he announced.
“Pity he can’t stay for longer,” Arthur said, sipping at his drink. “Maybe next time.”
When Will arrived, there was a flurry of introductions as he plopped down between Elyan and Gwaine. Will wasn’t a football fan, but he fit in easily, becoming fast friends with Gwaine when they got into an argument about which of them could drink the other under the table. Merlin was thankful it could only escalate so far with Will’s one-drink limit for the night, but the argument had ended with the promise of a rain check that could only end in disaster.
Soon after, the group broke into several smaller conversations, with most of the group chattering about their football game in the park. Gwen and Morgana found a small table to themselves, heads bent together whispering and laughing, shooting the occasional glance at the rest of their friends. Will and Merlin did the same, not wanting to get in the middle of the bickering about who played dirty and if that last goal actually counted or not.
Merlin settled into his chair and sipped at his drink. “It’s too bad you have to rush back to work.”
Will shrugged. “It’s a busy time, this’ll count as my dinner break. I’m surprised you spent all day watching football. Even a casual game in the park.”
Merlin ducked his head, a flush spreading up his neck and over his cheeks. “Yeah, not how I would usually spend a Saturday.”
“So why’d you go?”
Merlin rolled his pint between his hands, swiping his thumb through the condensation gathering on the outside. “Arthur asked, and I didn’t want to say no, I suppose.”
Will raised an eyebrow and slowly set his drink down. He darted a glance at Arthur, and back at Merlin. “Arthur asked,” Will echoed. “That’s all it took?”
“Yeah?”
“Merlin.”
“Hmm?” Merlin said absentmindedly, still toying with his glass, checking on Arthur out of the corner of his eye. His heart skipped a beat when he caught Arthur sneaking a glance back at him.
“Merlin.” Will aimed a kick at Merlin under the table.
“Ow!” Merlin complained, bending down to rub at his ankle. “What was that for?”
“I’m trying to have a serious conversation with you!” Will retorted.
Merlin pursed his lips, glaring. “It’s not feeling all that serious.”
Will shot Merlin an exasperated look. “Tell me honestly, Merlin. Do you have feelings for him?”
“For who?” Merlin hedged.
Will slapped Merlin on the arm. “Don’t play dumb. For Arthur, who else?”
Merlin froze. Swallowing hard, he slumped forward, leaning his forehead on one hand. “I might,” he whispered.
Will sighed and took a long swig of his drink. “Yeah. Yeah, I figured.”
Merlin winced. “From the football?”
“No, not really,” Will said, considering. “I suspected from the first time I saw you together. You don’t behave anything like friends with benefits. But you were so insistent, and you seemed happy, so I wanted to believe you.”
“Who falls for their friends with benefits?” Merlin groaned, shoving his face into his palm.
Will snorted a laugh. “A lot of people, mate. But I don’t think it’s that simple with you and Arthur.”
Merlin squinted at Will through his fingers. “What do you mean?”
Will looked between Merlin and Arthur, a knowing glint in his eyes. “Look, I’m no expert, and I don’t really know Arthur at all. But I’d bet money he likes you too.”
Merlin laughed nervously. “I don’t know, Will. This was meant to be casual.”
Will pursed his lips thoughtfully. “I know. And I don’t want you to get hurt again, Merlin. It’s why I pushed you to try tinder to begin with. But actions speak louder than words. You spent years believing the nonsense those blokes you used to date would say. Maybe you need to spend a little less time listening to the words, and a little more time paying attention to the actions.”
Merlin was silent, struck by the wisdom in Will’s words.
Will continued, “I’m just saying, I don’t have any friends who would carry me to bed just to make sure I didn’t wake up with a crick in my neck. And I’m pretty sure you don’t either.”
An involuntary smile spread across Merlin’s face at the memory.
Will tossed back the rest of his drink. “I need to get going. Think about it, yeah?”
Merlin nodded, rising to walk Will to the door. Will swung an arm around Merlin’s shoulders for a quick, one-armed hug and set off with a backwards wave.
Merlin wandered back to their tables, retrieving his drink and plopping down beside Gwen. “What did I miss?” he asked.
“Nothing much,” Gwen said. “Are you and Will all right? I saw some scuffling.”
Merlin snorted. “We’re fine. Will’s being Will, as usual.”
Gwen peered at Merlin skeptically. “Really? Whatever you two were talking about looked serious. That doesn’t seem like typical Will to me.”
Merlin tried his hardest not to blush with little success. In the dim pub lighting, he prayed Gwen and Morgana wouldn’t notice the pink in his cheeks. “Just talking about work,” Merlin lied.
Gwen still looked skeptical, but Merlin was grateful when she didn’t press further.
“So, Morgana,” Merlin said, hastily changing the subject. “Have you been the only person sitting on the sidelines of these football games up until now?”
“Not always,” Morgana said, sipping her martini. She picked up the empty toothpick from her glass and lazily waved it at the table holding the rest of their friends. “Sometimes one of the blokes has brought someone along. Usually whoever Gwaine is trying to sleep with that week. About a year ago, when Percival had a girlfriend, she would join from time to time.”
Merlin nodded along. “And Arthur?”
Morgana smiled slyly and turned toward Arthur. Merlin followed her gaze, his stomach giving a pleased flip-flop when he caught Arthur looking back at him again. “No, not Arthur,” Morgana said. “He’s never invited anyone before you.”
Merlin’s face felt hot. He glanced away quickly, but Arthur’s gaze was like a brand on the back of his neck. “There’s a first time for everything,” he said lightly.
Morgana hummed. She leaned forward across the small table and laid a hand on Merlin’s arm. “Merlin, I’ll be blunt,” Morgana said, her eyes piercing and her voice serious. “It means something Arthur invited you. That you’ve met and spent time with our friends. I don’t pretend to know the details of your relationship, but I’ve seen how you two are together. And trust me, Merlin, it’s no coincidence Arthur can’t keep his eyes off you.”
Merlin gaped at Morgana, his hand so tight around his glass he was sure it would shatter. Before he could gather his thoughts, Morgana leaned back and turned to her right with an angelic smile.
“Leon, darling!” she trilled, tucking her hand in the crook of Leon’s elbow when he appeared beside her.
Leon shot her a besotted smile. “I’m getting another round for the table, do you three want anything?”
Merlin, Gwen, and Morgana all agreed to another round, and Morgana swept away on Leon’s arm, offering to help him carry the drinks.
Merlin stared after them blankly until Arthur’s voice cut through his reverie.
“Merlin?” Arthur said, dropping into Morgana’s vacated seat.
Merlin jolted, practically knocking his glass off the table. He scrambled to catch it, but Arthur’s warm hands curled around his, steadying the glass. Gently, Arthur pried Merlin’s fingers away and moved the glass out of his reach.
“Hi,” Merlin said, offering a weak smile.
“I’m going to go help Leon and Morgana with the drinks,” Gwen announced. Before Merlin had a chance to react, Gwen shot out of her seat and darted for the bar.
“You all right?” Arthur asked, drumming his fingers on the back of Merlin’s hand to get his attention.
Merlin’s gaze snapped back to Arthur’s face, noticing a slight worried frown on his lips. “Perfectly fine,” Merlin said. “Why do you ask?”
Arthur raised an eyebrow. “I could see the look on my sister’s face from all the way over there. Did she give you a hard time?”
The earnest expression on Arthur’s face made Merlin’s heart race. Could Morgana be right? “She didn’t. You don’t have to worry,” Merlin said, flashing Arthur his best smile and curling his fingers around Arthur’s.
Arthur squeezed Merlin’s hand, but he didn’t look entirely convinced. “Are you sure? You can tell me if she did, and I’ll speak to her.”
“I’m sure, Arthur,” Merlin said softly, a wave of affection washing over him. “Morgana’s nice actually. I like her.”
Arthur huffed a surprised laugh. “I don’t know if I should be delighted or worried that you two get on.”
“A little of both probably,” Merlin teased. “Turnabout is fair play, you get along alarmingly well with my friends.”
“Well, Lance and Elyan are good blokes, and Gwen is easy to talk to. Even Will has his charm once he warmed to me a little,” Arthur said with a grin.
Merlin hummed, distracted by Arthur’s thumb brushing across his knuckles. “Gwaine and Will are going to be a dangerous combination.”
Arthur grimaced. “One of them is going to end up with alcohol poisoning next time if we’re not careful.”
“We’ll be extra careful then,” Merlin promised. His heart skipped a beat at the easy way the words “next time” fell from Arthur’s lips – as if it was a given.
They gazed at each other with identical soft smiles until the moment was broken by the clang of glass on the tabletop. Leon set down his handful of pints, followed by Morgana and Gwen. Fresh drinks acquired, Lance, Elyan, Gwaine, and Percival crowded around the small round table, each clamoring for a pint.
Gwen slipped back into her seat, with Lance edging to her side to rest an arm around her shoulders. Leon took the seat beside Arthur, and Morgana smoothly slid into his lap, sipping at her second martini.
Arthur shuffled his chair closer to Merlin to make room for everyone to squeeze in around the table, some standing, some finding more chairs to pull up and sit in.
“We have a booth over there, remind me why we’re all packed in around this tiny table?” Merlin asked, jabbing his finger toward the now empty booth, barely avoiding poking Gwaine in the groin.
“We’re at a pub, mate,” Gwaine drawled. “We go where the drink is!”
Merlin wasn’t sure why they insisted “the drink” would stay at the small table instead of moving back to their much more reasonably sized booth, but as the banter continued and the night wore on, Merlin found he didn’t care.
Amid the slightly hazy night, Arthur remained the sole bright spot. Somewhere around the fourth round, Arthur dragged Merlin onto his lap and wrapped a strong arm around his waist. Arthur was warm, and his firm chest was a comfortable, solid wall at Merlin’s back. Arthur hooked his chin over Merlin’s shoulder, hugging him close, and Merlin could tell from the slur in Arthur’s words that he was drunk.
Merlin peered at Arthur’s mostly empty glass. When Gwaine offered another round, Merlin shook his head and elbowed Arthur in the ribs. “None for us. I’ve had enough, and I’d rather not have to carry this one home.”
Arthur pouted up at Merlin. “Don’t be ridiculous, you would not need to carry me home,” he said, stumbling over the word “ridiculous”.
Merlin twisted in Arthur’s lap to drop a kiss on his lips. “No more,” Merlin insisted.
The pout melted away, and Arthur’s hands crept up Merlin’s back. Merlin grabbed Arthur’s shoulders for balance, swaying forward until their noses brushed. Arthur surged up to close the distance between them, pressing Merlin ever closer. When Merlin began to lose himself in the kiss, his fingers burying themselves in Arthur’s hair, a polite cough came from beside them.
Merlin tore himself away from Arthur’s lips, looking around with an embarrassed expression, his hands pushing away Arthur’s attempts to reel him back in. Merlin kicked Arthur in the ankle and hissed, “We are in public, clotpole.”
Their friends were staring back at them, wide-eyed.
“Sorry,” Merlin said sheepishly.
Gwaine leered and said, “If that’s how you are in public, I’d love to have a look at what in private is like.”
That snapped Arthur out of his drunken haze. With a flush high on his cheeks, he barked, “Gwaine!”
Leon cleared his throat. “Well, I think that’s our cue to leave.”
Goodbyes were said all around with everyone gathering up their things to leave the pub. When Leon hugged Merlin goodbye, it was with a friendly, “I trust you’ll get him home in one piece. That used to be my job, but I think you’ve got it covered now.”
There was a teasing but encouraging glint in Leon’s eyes that left Merlin speechless. Soon, Merlin was left to bundle Arthur into their uber and get him back into their flat on his own. It was an easier journey than he’d anticipated. Arthur was cooperative, seemingly only concerned with clinging to Merlin and burying his face in Merlin’s neck with quiet little snuffles that sounded like Merlin’s name.
When Merlin curled into Arthur’s side that night, and Arthur automatically draped his arm over Merlin’s waist, Merlin hid a smile in his pillow, thinking he could get used to this.
--
Merlin spent weeks pondering Morgana’s words, wondering if there was any truth to them. Arthur was his usual affectionate self, but even that set Merlin’s thoughts reeling. If Morgana was to be believed, the Arthur who doled out frequent touches and soft smiles was far from the Arthur his friends were used to. Too many times, he almost broached the topic, only to swallow the words back down.
Merlin woke feeling out of sorts, his entire body achy and warm. The room was dark, too dark to be morning. Merlin tossed and turned, slipping in and out of a fitful doze, tracking the time by the sunlight creeping across the floor each time he opened his eyes. It was almost a relief when Arthur’s alarm blared.
With a groan, Arthur silenced the sound. Eyes barely open, he rolled over to reach for Merlin, but froze mid-stretch, squinting at Merlin’s awake and pouting face.
“Merlin?” Arthur said, voice scratchy with sleep. “What are you doing awake?”
“Couldn’t sleep,” Merlin croaked. “Feeling crappy.”
Arthur blinked the sleep from his eyes, immediately alert and propping himself up on one arm. He ran a soothing hand down Merlin’s side, shuffled closer, and pressed his palm to Merlin’s forehead. Arthur’s lips turned down in a frown. “You feel warm. Hang on, I’m getting the thermometer.”
Merlin burrowed into the blankets, grumbling when Arthur tugged the covers away to hold the no-touch thermometer to his forehead. Arthur’s frown deepened. “Thirty-eight degrees – you have a fever.”
Merlin chuckled hoarsely. “That would explain it.”
Arthur set the thermometer down and drew Merlin into his arms. “Will you be all right by yourself today?”
“I’ll be fine, I’m barely feverish,” Merlin said, leaning into Arthur’s chest and tucking his head under Arthur’s chin. “Besides, I can take care of myself.”
“I beg to differ,” Arthur said, raising an eyebrow. “Have you seen yourself? You look like a small, pitiful kitten.”
Merlin swatted at Arthur’s chest. “Shut up, I don’t need to be coddled.”
“I didn’t say you did. I can stay home, you know? I have my laptop.”
“Arthur,” Merlin said firmly. “I do not need supervision just because my temperature is a little high.” Arthur opened his mouth to argue, but Merlin stopped him with a hand over his lips. “Go to work, Arthur.”
Arthur rolled his eyes, huffing, but he nodded begrudgingly. “At least take a paracetamol,” Arthur mumbled from beneath Merlin’s hand.
“After you leave for work,” Merlin promised.
When Arthur was dressed and ready to head out the door, Merlin climbed out of bed, wrapping the duvet around his shoulders and dragging it with him through the living room. Arthur stood at the door, regarding Merlin with a worried look in his eyes. He tucked a stray lock of hair behind Merlin’s ear, and Merlin recognized it for the fussing gesture it was.
“Go to work, Arthur,” Merlin repeated softly. “I’ll be fine, promise.”
Arthur leaned in to press a kiss to Merlin’s cheek. “Text me once in a while so I know you’re alive?”
Merlin nodded, reaching out with one duvet-covered hand for Arthur’s. “I’ll text. At least once every few hours.”
Arthur looked somewhat mollified. “Good enough,” he said.
Merlin made a shooing motion with his free hand. “Go to work already, dollophead.”
Arthur huffed a laugh, tugging Merlin close to slot their lips together. Merlin’s eyes slid shut, and he smiled into the kiss. “You trying to get sick?” Merlin whispered as he broke away, teasing.
“Hmm, I’m made of tougher stuff than you,” Arthur said, a smirk spreading across his face.
Merlin laughed and gave Arthur a light shove. “Will you leave already?”
Grinning, Arthur paused in the doorway. His eyes were soft when he glanced backward. “I’ll see you after work, Merlin.”
Merlin inwardly cursed his too-fond tone as he murmured, “Yeah, I’ll be here.”
It had barely been half an hour when Merlin’s phone dinged with a text from Arthur. ’Did you take the paracetamol?’
Merlin rolled his eyes. ’Yes, Your Highness.’
’How could I possibly be the royal one in this situation? I’m more like your much put-upon nurse, run ragged by your belligerence.’
’Drama queen.’
Barely past 5:00 p.m., there came the sound of a key in the lock. Merlin had been curled up on the couch with his kindle – he looked up, surprised to see Arthur step through the door. “Arthur? You’re home early.”
The corner of Arthur’s lips quirked up in a half-smile as he hung up his coat. “I wasn’t busy, didn’t need to stay late today.”
Merlin narrowed his eyes, sitting up straighter and setting his kindle down on the couch beside him. “You’re always busy. Did you leave early because I’m sick?”
Arthur perched on the edge of the couch and laid a hand against Merlin’s forehead. “So what if I did?” he muttered. “You feel less warm.”
“The paracetamol worked,” Merlin said, regarding Arthur with soft, wide eyes, his chest suffused with a warmth completely separate from the fever.
He let Arthur fuss over him, let Arthur take his temperature again to confirm his fever had indeed gone down. They ordered takeout for dinner – Indian at Merlin’s insistence – and laid down together on the couch after eating to watch a movie. Arthur curled into the corner, arm slung around a cushion, while Merlin sprawled lengthwise across the couch, his head pillowed in Arthur’s lap.
Halfway through the movie, Merlin stopped watching the screen, eyes drawn instead to Arthur, enjoying the play of emotions across Arthur’s face as he got absorbed in the story. Arthur laughed uproariously, looking down at Merlin with a wide grin. It faded into a concerned smile when he saw Merlin wasn’t laughing along. “What’s wrong?”
Merlin hastily turned his gaze back to the screen. “Nothing.”
“You always laugh at dumb jokes like this.”
Merlin shrugged, avoiding Arthur’s gaze, grateful for the dimmed lights to hide his blush. “Must’ve zoned out.”
Arthur’s voice turned soft and understanding. “We can pause the movie. Pick up another day. Maybe you should get some rest.”
Merlin shook his head, grabbing the remote and flinging it to the other end of the couch. “I’m fine, I want to finish the movie.”
Arthur huffed an exasperated laugh. “Whatever you want,” he said indulgently.
Gaze trained on the screen, Merlin reached for Arthur’s arm where it was draped across his chest, twining their fingers together. Arthur didn’t speak, only gave Merlin’s fingers a light squeeze and pressed his palm to Merlin’s chest.
When the movie ended, Arthur murmured, “Why don’t I make a cup of tea?”
“That sounds nice,” Merlin said, shifting enough to allow Arthur to get up. As Arthur busied himself in the kitchen, Merlin slid into the spot Arthur vacated, resting his head against the cushions and feeling Arthur’s residual warmth surrounding him.
When Arthur returned with their tea, Merlin accepted his gratefully, scooting to sit up against one end of the couch, cup in one hand, kindle in the other. Arthur did the same at the other end of the couch with his laptop propped on his knees.
They spent the rest of the night quietly in each other’s presence, the only sound the tap of Arthur’s keyboard as he worked. Merlin’s eyes were constantly drawn back to Arthur, replaying the days’ moments of Arthur fussing over him, of his soft, concerned gazes. In his mind’s eye, he replayed countless moments between them from their past months together – sweet, caring, infused with something Merlin was beginning to dare think.
Arthur glanced up, catching Merlin’s eye. “Are you all right?”
Merlin fumbled his kindle, nearly knocking it off his lap. “Completely fine.”
“Are you sure? You’ve got this dazed look on your face.”
“I do not.”
“You do too,” Arthur insisted, raising an eyebrow. “And it’s not the first time tonight.”
Merlin flushed and scrambled to his feet. “An idea! I’ve had an idea for a story I have to get down on paper,” he lied, rushing off to his office and slamming the door.
“Merlin?” Arthur called, sounding confused.
Merlin ignored him. He leaned against his desk, hanging his head and squeezing his eyes shut.
’Actions speak louder than words,’ Will had said.
’Arthur can’t keep his eyes off you,’ Morgana had said.
Merlin shook his head, confusion and hope swirling into one incomprehensible mess in his mind. A lot of things went unsaid between him and Arthur. Probably too many things, considering.
But Will wasn’t wrong. Merlin had spent too long believing his exes’ pretty words even while their actions screamed the opposite. Words like “I love you” were the currency in his relationships, a bit of affection exchanged for a piece of Merlin’s heart until he had nothing left to give.
Arthur was different though. Words held too much weight with him, and he shied away from open declarations. But his touches and gestures revealed what he wouldn’t say. Arthur cared. That, Merlin knew with a certainty. This thing between them was something Merlin didn’t know how to put into words yet, so he couldn’t fault Arthur for not giving voice to it either.
Maybe Merlin was a coward, maybe they both were. But, for once, Merlin was hearing the words not said clearer than the ones that were. For once, Merlin wondered if perhaps love could be found in the spaces in between.
--
Weeks later, a letter was shoved under Merlin’s door from the landlord. He skimmed the contents – it was a notice for the renewal of his lease on the flat.
“I’ve been meaning to tell you,” Merlin said, eyes flicking to Arthur as he raised a forkful of potatoes to his mouth. “My lease is up soon. The landlord wants to know if I’m going to renew.”
Arthur hummed around his chewing, waving his fork to motion for Merlin to continue.
“What do you think?” Merlin asked.
Arthur shrugged, swallowing his mouthful of food. “It’s up to you. Do you want to stay another year?”
Merlin glanced around, filled with mixed emotions. “I don’t know. I like the flat, but I know you don’t love how far it is from your father’s house. I mean, you’ve kept your old flat just for a place to crash after your dinners with Uther. I’m not opposed to moving, you know. If you’d rather we not renew the lease.”
Arthur froze, staring wide-eyed down at his plate. Slowly, Arthur lifted his gaze to Merlin’s face. Merlin, who was still chewing distractedly as he studied the flat. “Merlin,” Arthur said weakly.
“Hmm?”
“What do you mean by if ‘we’ don’t renew the lease?” Arthur’s voice was strained, and there was something akin to panic behind his eyes.
Puzzled, Merlin frowned. “Exactly what I said? I’ve seen your old flat, you’re clearly used to a different standard of living. I’ve been here a while, but maybe we want to look for a place we both like.”
A stricken look flickered across Arthur’s face. “We’re looking for a flat together?” Arthur rasped.
Merlin’s eyes followed the bob of Arthur’s Adam’s apple, feeling as if they were having two different conversations. “Shouldn’t we? Or is this your way of telling me you're having second thoughts?” His cheeky smile faded as full panic set in over Arthur’s features.
Heart sinking, Merlin reached out to touch Arthur’s hand. “Arthur?”
Arthur drew back sharply. “Should we? As roommates. As friends with benefits?” he asked, his voice taking on a shrill edge.
Merlin reeled back, the blood draining out of his face. Shakily, he said, “As friends with benefits. After all this time, that’s all this has been to you?”
Arthur flinched. He looked uncertain and vulnerable when he jerked a hand through his hair, eyes looking everywhere except at Merlin. “Is... is that not what you thought we were?” Arthur asked in a quiet voice.
The beginnings of tears choked Merlin’s throat. Blinking rapidly, he scoffed, pretending the sound wasn’t watery and brittle. Merlin squared his shoulders, clenching his hands into fists on his thighs. “Sure, Arthur. I invite all my friends with benefits to move in with me and cook them dinner every night.”
“You haven’t had any other friends with benefits,” Arthur pointed out, darting a glance up at Merlin’s stony expression. Regret flashed across Arthur’s features, but it was too late.
Furious, Merlin snapped, “That’s right. But Mr. Experience would know better, since you’ve strung on plenty of men like me, haven’t you?”
Arthur winced, an apology written all over his face. But Arthur always gave as good as he got, and Merlin could spot the moment Arthur’s temper won out. He scowled and flung back, “It’s not like I meant to do it. How was I supposed to know you’d read more into all this?”
“’Read more into all this,’” Merlin repeated, voice low and dangerous. “You’re such an arse, Arthur. You sleep in the same bed with me every night, and really, at this point, there are more nights we don’t have sex than we do. We spend all our time together. We go out together. Hell, you kiss me goodbye before work and hello when you come home. You bought me a fucking couch! What the hell do you think that all is if not a relationship?”
Arthur’s mouth flapped soundlessly, confusion and guilt warring for dominance on his face. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly.
Merlin barked a derisive laugh. With a screech of chair legs against the floor, he stood abruptly. The chair teetered on two legs before landing with a dull thunk. Merlin glared at Arthur, full of righteous indignation. But all at once, the fight drained out of him. Shoulders slumping, he gripped the edge of the table with one hand and covered his face with the other.
“Get out,” Merlin ordered.
“What?”
“You heard me,” Merlin said, straightening and backing away from Arthur. He turned, bracing himself against the counter. Staring into the living room, he said to the air, “I think you should pack your things, Arthur.”
The words were met with a heavy silence.
A wild hope bubbled up in Merlin’s chest. A tiny hope Arthur would throw his arms around him and beg Merlin to forgive him.
The hope was squashed when he heard the light scraping of a chair being pushed back and the whisper of fabric as Arthur brushed past him. Out of the corner of his eye, Merlin saw Arthur glance at him, hesitating, hand twitching toward Merlin. But Merlin didn’t relent, stubbornly refusing to meet Arthur’s wounded gaze.
Arthur didn’t speak, turning away and disappearing into the bedroom. When he returned, a bag in hand, he stopped in the middle of the living room, throwing determined looks at the side of Merlin’s face.
When Merlin finally gave in and turned his head, Arthur’s expression wavered. Merlin waited for him to speak, but instead, Arthur remained silent. Whatever he wanted to say, he never found the words. Face falling, Arthur broke away and bent down to pack away a book left on the coffee table the night before.
Merlin watched Arthur’s progress across the flat with a forced, stoic expression. He watched as Arthur packed away one thing after another that had made a home in his life and in his heart.
God, Merlin was tired. Tired of being made the fool. Tired of always believing what he wanted to believe instead of what was in front of his eyes.
When Arthur picked up the red tie from the first day they met, Merlin couldn’t take it anymore. He stalked past Arthur into the bedroom, stuffed a change of clothes into an overnight bag, and marched for the door.
As he swept past the couch, Merlin’s step faltered. He paused, angling his body enough to see Arthur in his peripheral vision. Swallowing around the lump in his throat, Merlin said, “I’m going to stay with Gwen. I’ll be back in the morning, and I expect you and your things to be gone by then.”
“Merlin,” Arthur pleaded. His voice was soft, Merlin’s name said with a tenderness that had his heart breaking the tiniest bit more.
Merlin turned away. He paused one last time with his hand on the doorknob. “I loved you,” Merlin whispered and let the door fall shut behind him.
He didn’t know if Arthur heard him. He wasn’t even sure if the confession had been meant for Arthur’s ears or his own.
--
“I loved you.”
Arthur froze, his uncooperative limbs almost sending him tumbling to the floor. His pulse roared in his ears, and his heart felt as though it might beat out of his chest.
’I loved you.’
It wasn’t the first time Arthur had been on the receiving end of a confession of love. Arthur was well-practiced at letting someone down gently.
But this was Merlin. The raw honesty in Merlin’s voice scraped at Arthur’s insides. The words felt as though they were burrowing under his skin, and Arthur didn’t know if he wanted to claw them out or push them deeper.
The door clicked shut.
Arthur was seized with a bout of irrational panic, filled with the urge to fling himself through the door and chase after Merlin. To stop Merlin from walking out of his life, to beg him to come back.
But Arthur didn't.
Instead, he continued to pack, meticulously moving from one room to the next, searching for all his scattered possessions. It was harder than he expected to distinguish between his things and Merlin’s. Their things had mixed so thoroughly that, more than once, Arthur seriously questioned if he was collecting his things or if he was stealing Merlin’s.
With each item that was tucked away, Arthur’s anxiety climbed. Once his bags were full, he collapsed onto the couch, dropping his head into his hands and pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes. He took a shaky breath, trying to collect his swirling thoughts into a semblance of something that made sense.
When Arthur first met Merlin, he was certain neither of them had been looking for a long-term relationship. So where had ‘I loved you’ come from?
No… if Arthur was honest, he should have seen the writing on the wall. He wasn’t stupid, just willfully ignorant to all the many ways he’d treated Merlin as more than a “friends with benefits” – as he’d so bluntly put it. But he’d always believed he and Merlin were on the same page. That was why he’d felt free to treat Merlin the way he had.
There was something about Merlin that made everything feel easy. It was easy to touch him, to kiss him, but it wasn’t supposed to mean anything. Arthur cared about Merlin – wasn’t blind enough to pretend there was nothing there beyond friendship. But none of it mattered. Whatever affection he might hold for Merlin, it wasn’t enough to make Arthur want to stay and be the “forever” he now realized Merlin wanted.
Arthur forced himself to stand and take one last lap around. It was odd, very odd, to see the flat so devoid of his own things. Despite Merlin’s ever-present clutter, the flat looked too empty to Arthur’s eyes. When he stepped into the bedroom – for the last time, Arthur realized with a grimace – his eyes landed on the silver ring resting on his nightstand.
Arthur reached for it. As his hand moved into his field of vision, he saw rather than felt the tremble in his fingers. Clenching his hand into a fist, he told himself firmly, ’No.’ He was fine, Merlin was the one who had misunderstood.
Snatching up the ring, Arthur slid it onto his finger, where it had sat every day since his sixteenth birthday. He paused, fingers lingering on the metal, something inside him twisting at the thought of removing every trace of himself from Merlin’s life.
Slowly, ever so slowly, Arthur pulled the ring off again. He lifted it to his face, studying the thin, worn-away inscription carved on the inside of the band.
’Yours always,’ it read. It had been a promise from his father to his mother.
Arthur rolled the ring between his thumb and forefinger, closing his eyes and drawing in a deep breath. His eyes snapped open, and with a clatter, he dropped the ring onto the nightstand. Before he could regret his decision, Arthur turned on his heel, scooped up his bags, and marched out of the flat without a backward glance.
--
In the morning, Gwen dropped Merlin off back at his flat.
“Merlin, do you want me to come up with you?” Gwen asked softly, touching his arm as he pushed open the door to the building.
“No, thanks, Gwen.” Merlin managed to muster enough strength to shoot Gwen a weary smile.
“Are you sure?” she pressed. “I don't mind, I don’t have to be at work until the afternoon.”
“I’ll be all right,” Merlin said. “I’ll call you tonight?”
Reluctantly, Gwen nodded and stepped back. Merlin could feel her worried gaze on his back as he walked inside. Before stepping into the elevator, he turned to give her a small wave, pasting on what he hoped was a reassuring smile.
When Merlin got to the door to his flat, his courage fled. He laid both palms on the door and leaned his forehead against the wood, drawing in shallow breaths until he felt steady enough to stand unsupported. Hands shaking, Merlin fished the keys out from his pocket and fumbled the correct one into the lock.
With a deep breath, Merlin straightened, squared his shoulders, and turned the key.
The door swung open at a slight push.
Merlin waited with bated breath, half-wondering if Arthur would appear.
Arthur did not appear.
With a heavy sigh - of relief or disappointment, he couldn't say - Merlin stumbled inside, kicking the door shut.
A lump formed in Merlin’s throat as he glanced around. It was increasingly obvious the flat had been emptied of Arthur’s things. Absentmindedly, Merlin ran a hand over the back of the couch, straightening a cushion. He flashed back to the day they’d picked it out together, their laughter echoing in his ears. Merlin snatched his hand back as if burned.
He fled to the kitchen, pouring a glass of water and leaning back against the counter as he gulped it down. The kitchen had been cleaned, Merlin realized. The countertops were wiped down, and the plates from the night before were sitting neatly on the drying rack. Merlin choked out a sound halfway between a laugh and a sob. Arthur bickered with him over doing dishes practically every night, who knew this was what it would take to settle the argument?
Merlin wondered when he would be able to stop thinking of things in the flat in relation to Arthur. The ghost of his presence still hung over every corner, Arthur’s scent still lingering in the air. Merlin wasn’t trying to forget, but it hurt to look around the room and see only the empty spaces left behind.
Exhausted, Merlin picked up his bag and headed for the bedroom. He stripped off his clothes, wanting nothing more than to change into something comfortable, collapse onto the couch, and drown his sorrows in front of the telly.
Merlin paused two steps away from the bed. The blankets were mussed, but the bed clearly had not been slept in. Telly forgotten, Merlin sat gingerly, reaching out to brush his fingers over Arthur’s pillow.
A glint of silver caught his eye on the nightstand, and Merlin stopped breathing.
Arthur had left his ring.
With a trembling hand, Merlin picked up the ring, cradling it in his palm. All at once, the emotions from the past day bubbled up inside him, threatening to spill over. He stared at the ring until his vision blurred. Hot tears spilled down his cheeks, and with a choked-off gasp, Merlin curled up on the bed, Arthur’s ring still clenched in his hand.
It took the better part of an hour, but Merlin eventually ran out of tears, and his heaving sobs petered into hiccupping gasps.
Merlin opened his fist, ignoring the stiffness in his fingers as the ring fell onto the bed covers. He stared at the silver band, debating hurling it against the wall. His fingers twitched toward it, but Merlin couldn’t do it. With a resigned sigh, he picked it up and tucked it away in the drawer of the nightstand that was once Arthur’s.
--
Merlin’s days passed in a daze after the breakup. Could it even be called that if it wasn’t a relationship? Everything seemed surreal, some days Merlin woke having forgotten Arthur had moved out. He had too many mornings where he woke expecting to feel Arthur’s warmth beside him, followed by a pang of disappointment Arthur had gone to work without waking him.
Reality always caught up to him soon after. He couldn’t ignore it even if he wanted to.
Gwen had long warned him Arthur would break his heart, and she texted to check on him every day.
Will had tried to get him drunk the day after Arthur moved out. He never said the words, but Merlin could tell he was wracked with guilt for telling Merlin to believe Arthur’s actions instead of his words.
Merlin tried to reassure them this was all his own doing. In some ways, it felt like an inevitability Merlin would fall in love with a stupidly perfect Arthur who said and did all the right things, even if he never said the one thing Merlin needed to hear.
But Arthur was gone, and he’d left an Arthur-shaped hole in Merlin’s life and heart.
To compensate, Merlin threw himself into his writing, the one comfort that would never leave him. Before everything happened, Merlin had been working on a prequel to his Knights of Camelot series. It was meant to chronicle King Arthur and Merlin’s adventures before they were legends, inspired by countless heated discussions between himself and Arthur about their namesakes.
When Merlin sat down to try and continue the story, it felt as if someone had thrust a knife through his heart.
But Merlin had always done well with using his emotions to fuel his work. So he took his pain and frustration and channeled it into a new story – one about misunderstandings, missed chances in life, and what-could-have-been’s. There were days he wrote through tears. There were days he wrote through suppressed snickers and laughter. There were days he wrote through rising fury. His story ran the gauntlet of human emotion, and when he read it back, Merlin could see the raw edges of his heart between the lines. He didn’t know if he would publish it, but as he poured his mess of emotions onto the page, the pain in his heart receded day by day.
Two months after Arthur walked out of his life, Merlin agreed to a blind date at Gwen’s pleading.
Gwen had set him up with a man she met in cooking class. As Gwen explained it, she met Noah by chance. Lance had been called into work last minute before their class, leaving her with no choice but to attend on her own or forfeit the money. Noah had noticed she didn’t have a partner and kindly offered to pair up with her. He had been nice and charming, and at the end of class, Gwen had blurted out the question to Noah asking if he would go on a blind date with her friend. She was mortified she hadn’t held her tongue, but to her surprise, Noah agreed.
Merlin wasn’t sure he was ready to date, but he didn’t want to let Gwen down. He didn’t expect Noah to be his happily ever after, but Merlin would be lying if he said a small part of him wasn’t hopeful. Being with Arthur had reminded him how much he wanted a partner, even if he had to risk being hurt. Losing Arthur, after the easy comfort they found together, had left Merlin with a loneliness he’d never felt before.
So Merlin walked up to Avalon’s Coffee, a few blocks away from his flat. As he approached, he noticed a tall, brown-haired man standing to the right of the door, glancing up and down the street nervously.
“Noah?” Merlin called.
The man’s head snapped around, an eager grin lighting up his face. “Merlin?”
Noah’s gaze danced over Merlin’s body, an appreciative gleam in his eyes. Merlin blushed, pleasantly surprised by the attention. “That’s me,” he said, giving a little wave.
Noah stepped closer, arms extended as if going in for a hug. Merlin froze, and Noah must’ve read something in Merlin’s expression that gave him pause. With an embarrassed cough, Noah’s arms dropped back down to his sides, and he offered a hand. “I’m delighted to meet you. You’re more gorgeous than Gwen said.”
Merlin’s cheeks felt as if they were on fire. He grasped Noah’s hand in a quick shake, stammering, “I’m flattered, you’re not too shabby yourself. Shall we go in?”
Noah smiled and opened the door to the coffee shop. “After you,” he said with a flourish of his arm.
“Thanks.” Merlin returned the smile and hurried inside. He was familiar with Avalon’s Coffee, so he only needed a quick glance around to find a quiet place to sit. Merlin headed for a small, unoccupied table by the windows, relieved Noah was happy to follow his lead.
A waitress came by to take their orders, and Merlin was alone with Noah once more. “I hear you met Gwen at a cooking class,” Merlin said, searching for a topic of conversation.
“I did,” Noah said, smiling. “Thank goodness for her too. I’m a bit hopeless at cooking – it’s why I signed up for the class. Gwen, though, she was brilliant. Honestly, she could’ve been teaching the class instead of taking it.”
Merlin laughed, nodding along fondly. “Yeah, Gwen’s a fantastic cook. Lance, her husband, isn’t so great at it though. But Gwen doesn’t want to teach him, and Lance refuses to let Gwen do all the cooking. This is their compromise.”
The waitress set down two cups of coffee at their table. Merlin reached for his eagerly, cupping his hands around the warm mug and taking a sip with a happy sigh.
“I heard,” Noah said with a chuckle. “Seems like the only reason I met Gwen is because Lance was called into work literally minutes before class started. It was my lucky day, I suppose.” Noah ducked his head to take a sip of his coffee, emphasizing the word “lucky” with a faint smile and a too-long look at Merlin’s lips.
Merlin cleared his throat, dropping his gaze to stare into his coffee. Noah was sweet, and clearly interested in Merlin. In fact, Merlin was pretty sure he could spill his coffee down Noah’s front, and he would still ask for a second date. But Merlin was feeling none of the rush of emotions or butterflies in his stomach that typically accompanied a first date.
It was too early to give up though – he owed it to Gwen to at least try.
Merlin leaned in, adopting a soft, flirty tone and looking up at Noah through his lashes as he asked Noah more about himself. They traded stories, and Merlin made sure to laugh at all of Noah’s jokes. In turn, Noah gave as good as he got, the two of them falling into an easy banter, Noah laughing in delight at Merlin’s quick wit.
As the date stretched on, Merlin’s smiles faded from flirtatious to polite. He genuinely enjoyed Noah’s company, but there were so many ways he was like Arthur, and so many ways he wasn’t. Each reminder only served to make Merlin miss Arthur more.
Merlin would be mid-laugh, lifting his head to meet Noah’s eyes, only to sober when he found a warm green instead of a clear blue. As the sun moved across the sky, light slanting through the window, Merlin would subconsciously search for the glint of gold in Arthur’s hair when the sunlight hit him just right, only to be disappointed when it wasn’t there. Noah would reach across the table to touch Merlin’s arm or take his hand, and Merlin would have to struggle not to pull away, his skin protesting the touch was wrong, nothing like the familiar feel of Arthur’s hand.
By the time they left the coffee shop, Merlin was certain the romantic spark was missing from his side. That, in his heart, he still wanted Arthur, no matter what he told himself.
Noah insisted on walking Merlin back to his flat. When they stopped in front of his door, Merlin could tell by the hopeful look in Noah’s eyes he wanted to be invited inside.
“I had a great time with you, Merlin,” Noah murmured, taking a step into Merlin’s space.
Merlin took a half-step back, blocked by the door. He swallowed and plastered on a smile. “Me too.”
Noah leaned in, his eyes fluttering shut, lips slightly parted. Merlin turned his head to the side, and Noah’s lips landed on his cheek instead of his lips. With a small, disappointed smile, Noah drew back. “This isn’t working for you, is it?”
Merlin winced and shook his head apologetically. “I’m sorry, Noah. You’re wonderful. I’m just… not as ready as I thought I was.”
Noah held up one hand, shaking his head. “No apologies necessary. I had a feeling. Call me if you change your mind, all right?”
Merlin laid a hand on Noah’s shoulder and leaned forward to brush his lips against his cheek. “I will. Thanks for a lovely date.”
“Same to you,” Noah said, expression friendly but wistful.
Merlin let himself back into his flat, tipping his forehead against the door. It shouldn’t have been a surprise he wasn’t ready. It had only been two months, after all.
He kicked off his shoes and sank onto the couch, laying across the cushions and dangling his legs over the armrest. Rubbing a weary hand over his eyes, Merlin fished his phone out from his pocket and called Gwen.
“Merlin!” Gwen answered. “How was your date?”
Merlin squirmed at Gwen’s bright tone. “It was… nice, I suppose. Noah’s a nice bloke, he’s just not for me.”
“Oh, Merlin,” Gwen said sympathetically. “Is this about Arthur?”
“Sort of. I don’t think I’m ready yet,” Merlin admitted. “Thank you for setting me up, but for now… once was enough.”
“Of course,” Gwen murmured. “I’m sorry, Merlin. I thought it might be good for you.”
Merlin was shaking his head before Gwen had finished speaking. “Don’t apologize, Gwen. I appreciate it, I really do. Give me a couple of months and you can find me as many Noahs as you want,” he joked.
Gwen chuckled fondly. “I suppose this was a little hasty. Noah reminded me a little bit of Arthur. Maybe that’s why I was so eager for you to meet him.”
“Yeah, I saw it too,” Merlin murmured. More quietly, he added, “I still miss him, Gwen.”
A soft, understanding sigh filtered through the speaker. “I know.”
While Merlin was relieved to not have to worry about being set up on dates, he was craving companionship. Two months with nothing but his hand for company was driving him slightly crazy. He hadn’t been interested in inviting Noah into his bed, but he had been looking forward to the potential for sex.
With no better options, back to tinder Merlin went.
It was a rather nerve-wracking experience, somehow worse than the first time, since, this time, he was terrified of seeing Arthur’s profile. To his relief, as he swiped through pictures of blokes, Arthur’s face never popped up.
Merlin picked the first attractive bloke who had his cock perking up with interest and invited him for a drink. The bloke’s name was Lucas, and he was fit, blond, and blue-eyed. Merlin had the fastest drink of his life before the two of them were tripping their way back to Merlin’s flat, a walk full of burning gazes and wandering hands. They had barely made it inside when Lucas dropped to his knees and greedily sucked Merlin’s cock down. It had been too long, and Lucas’s mouth was divine. In no time at all, Merlin was coming down Lucas’s throat, biting his lip hard enough to taste blood to stop himself from shouting Arthur’s name.
He had let Lucas stretch him open and fuck him there on the floor, not interested in getting to know Lucas or in letting him further into Merlin’s home. Merlin allowed Lucas the briefest cuddle while reclined against the back of the couch, but once Lucas nuzzled at his neck, he shot to his feet and ushered Lucas out the door.
Merlin had always thought himself the type to prefer a little company after sex, but he reluctantly acknowledged he now understood what Arthur meant about overstaying a welcome.
Wryly, he wondered if he was finally getting the hang of the whole casual sex lark.
Merlin did it two more times over the next two weeks, finding a new face each time to invite back to his flat for a quick fuck that did nothing for his loneliness but took the edge off his frustration.
Every day, the thought of Arthur hurt a little less, but Merlin was beginning to wonder if the day would ever come when it wouldn’t hurt at all.
--
Arthur thought he would be relieved to be on his own again, back in his luxurious flat with no one else’s things cluttering his space.
Instead, all Arthur felt was empty.
He felt as if he was simply going through the motions as he hung up his clothes and arranged his belongings back into the places they’d once sat. When he was done, he took a seat on his couch and gazed around the flat. It all felt so foreign. It didn’t feel like home anymore.
Arthur shoved away the feelings of uncertainty, convinced he would get used to it in no time. He was used to his old routine with Merlin, all he needed was a couple of weeks to find a new one. Merlin would soon be a distant memory.
A month passed, and to Arthur’s chagrin, Merlin featured no less prominently in his thoughts. If anything, it was possible he was… missing Merlin. A lot.
But that was impossible. People didn’t miss their friends with benefits, not unless they were looking for a shag. And they certainly didn’t miss the way their friends with benefits smelled after a shower or their sleep-soft smile on Sunday mornings.
Arthur hadn’t made a big deal out of moving out of Merlin’s flat. He didn’t even mention it to anyone until Leon texted asking if anyone was up for another game of football in the park. Everything was going fine until Leon asked Arthur if he wanted to invite Lance and Elyan again and if Merlin would be coming.
Arthur responded with a nonchalant “no” to both questions and casually mentioned he and Merlin weren’t living together anymore. He was promptly bombarded with a flurry of questions asking him “why” and “what happened” and “are you all right”. Arthur snapped, annoyed with typing every detail, and told them to meet him at the pub.
Arthur was the first to arrive. Thankful for small mercies, he grabbed a booth toward the back. Leon, Gwaine, and Percival trailed in not long after, with Leon having managed to circumvent Morgana only because she wasn’t home when he’d received the news.
An awkward silence hung over the table while they nursed their first round of drinks. Sighing inwardly, Arthur broke the uneasy silence. “So, like I said, I moved back into my old flat.”
Leon frowned, studying Arthur’s indifferent expression with no small amount of puzzlement. “So you and Merlin aren’t…” he struggled for words, mouth hanging open until he settled on, “…you and Merlin, anymore?”
Arthur shrugged. “Not anymore.”
“What happened, Arthur?” Leon asked, brows furrowed. “You two seemed happy together the last time we saw you.”
“We weren’t together,” Arthur snapped. Leon, Gwaine, and Percival collectively flinched at the vehemence in Arthur’s tone. He closed his eyes, forced himself to take a deep breath, and muttered, “Sorry.”
“Fine, you weren’t together,” Percival said, holding up his hands in a placating manner. “But you were something. We all saw it.”
Arthur huffed in annoyance and took a long swig of his beer. “We were friends with benefits. That’s what I told you lot from the beginning. Why do you care anyways? None of you have ever cared when I stopped hooking up with someone.”
Glances flew around the table, too quick for Arthur to follow or decipher. “Sure, but you weren’t just hooking up with Merlin. You moved in with him even though you have a much nicer flat, and you brought him to meet us,” Percival said.
“His flat was closer to my office. And Merlin’s a nice bloke, I thought you lot would like him. I wasn’t wrong,” Arthur said, defensive.
Gwaine raised a disbelieving eyebrow. “You weren’t wrong. Merlin’s great. But you don’t do this, Arthur. You don’t do this with hookups, and you’ve never done this with any of the girls you’ve dated.”
“Fine!” Arthur exclaimed. “Are you done dissecting my dating history now?”
Gwaine rolled his eyes. “We might be if you would tell us what happened.”
“Nosy buggers,” Arthur grumbled, gulping at his beer. “Merlin made it pretty clear he thought we were in a relationship even though all we’d ever agreed to was friends with benefits. I tried to tell him that, and he told me to leave. It was for the best, you know I’m not the type to get down on one knee.”
Arthur looked at his friends in succession, finding a mixture of exasperation and pity on their faces. “I don’t often say this, Arthur. But you’re an idiot,” Leon declared.
Arthur bristled, setting his glass down roughly on the table. He folded his arms across his chest and glared at Leon. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
Percival shook his head and chuckled. “Yeah, you are an idiot, Arthur.”
Arthur gaped at Percival. He scowled and swung around to Gwaine. “You gonna take a shot at me too?”
Gwaine smirked. “Think I’ll take a different tack actually,” he drawled. “What I’m getting from this is that Merlin is single and heartbroken. Since you’re done with him, you won’t mind if I have a go with him, would you?”
Arthur saw red. He snarled, “Stay the hell away from Merlin.”
Gwaine’s smirk turned smug. All roguish grace, he folded his hands behind his head and leaned back, casually resting his head against his linked fingers. “Mission accomplished.”
“What?” Arthur snapped. His fingers curled tight around his beer, trying to refrain from fitting his hands around Gwaine’s neck.
Leon elbowed Arthur in the side with a chuckle. Arthur turned a betrayed glare on him, but Leon ignored it, opting to tap Arthur’s white-knuckled hand and to pry his fingers away from his pint glass. “Do you hear yourself? Doesn’t your reaction tell you all you need to know?”
Arthur blinked, the rush of jealous-possessive-want receding as his head cooled down. Amid a wave of tired confusion, he sagged and stared down into his beer. “I’ve never felt like this before,” he croaked, surprising himself with the admission.
Leon, Gwaine, and Percival nodded along. Percival said, “We don’t think you’ve been honest with yourself about how you really feel about Merlin.”
Gwaine leaned in, his self-satisfied smirk replaced with a serious expression. “Mate, you looked like you were going to rip my head off. And you weren’t much better the first time we met Merlin. The only way you could’ve taken it further was if you peed on him to mark your territory.”
Arthur mustered a half-hearted glare. “But this isn’t what we agreed to,” he whispered, clutching his glass with both hands like a lifeline. “Relationships don’t work for me. You lot know that.”
“Maybe you just needed to find the right person,” Leon said, bumping Arthur’s shoulder with his. “Do you miss him?”
Arthur considered the question. He thought about his too-big, too-empty flat and his too-cold bed. He thought about how he hated that he was forgetting the sound of Merlin’s laugh. He thought about how Merlin’s flat was “home” while his flat was his “old flat”.
Regret and panic bubbled up within Arthur. He didn’t bother to hide any of it when he lifted his eyes to meet Leon’s. “Yeah, I miss him,” he whispered.
Leon’s gaze was full of understanding. Arthur slumped forward, burying his face in one hand, grateful for Leon’s silent comfort as he slung an arm over Arthur’s shoulders and didn’t say another word.
When Arthur returned to his flat, he threw himself onto the couch and stared at the ceiling. He’d possibly thrown away the only chance he had with Merlin, and he was only beginning to realize he might want that chance at all.
On Saturday morning, Arthur woke to the sound of his front door clattering open and the click of heels on his hardwood floor. He groaned, not bothering to open his eyes. There was only one person it could be.
The clicking stopped outside his bedroom. There were two quick raps on the door. “Hello, Arthur,” Morgana’s falsely sweet voice drifted over to him.
“Morgana.”
“Come out here already,” Morgana ordered. She clicked away, but Arthur knew she would be back if he didn’t comply.
The clock read 8:38 a.m. “You can’t barge into my flat and tell me what to do,” Arthur called, already dragging himself out of bed despite his protests. He padded over to his dresser to pull out a t-shirt and pyjama bottoms, careful to keep an ear out for any clicking sounds to make sure they weren’t closing in.
Arthur stepped out of his bedroom to find Morgana lounging on his couch, legs crossed, thumbs tapping furiously on her phone. “Good morning, dear sister. How nice to see you,” Arthur drawled.
Morgana spared him a fleeting glance, eyes sharp and assessing. “Good morning, brother dear. How nice of you to join me.”
Arthur barely suppressed the urge to roll his eyes. He busied himself in the kitchen making a pot of coffee. “To what do I owe the pleasure?” Arthur leaned against his kitchen island, trepidation growing as Morgana fixed him with a disappointed gaze.
“I heard the most surprising thing from Leon.”
“Oh?”
“He told me you’re not seeing Merlin anymore.”
The corner of Arthur’s lips tugged down, and he crossed his arms across his chest. “I was never ‘seeing’ Merlin.”
Morgana’s expression turned pitying. “Don’t be obtuse, Arthur. I’m not blind.”
Arthur threw his hands in the air. He spun around angrily, snatching up the coffee pot. After two steadying breaths, he calmed the shaking in his hand enough to pour two cups of coffee without spilling. “I’m not being obtuse,” Arthur insisted. “Merlin and I were very clear we weren’t looking for anything serious.”
Morgana joined Arthur in the kitchen. She poured a splash of milk into each of their cups and added a small scoop of sugar to hers. She leaned forward over the counter and wrapped her hands around the cup. With a sigh, she said softly, “I know, Arthur.”
The compassion in Morgana’s voice cracked through Arthur’s walls. He let go of the tension he had been storing inside, shoulders drooping. “But I miss him,” he admitted. “I’m sure you heard it all from Leon.”
Morgana smiled sadly, stirring her coffee with her spoon. “I want to hear it from you though. Why don’t you tell me what happened? From the beginning.”
Arthur and Morgana had always had a contentious relationship, but at the heart of it, she was his sister and the one person he’d always been able to confide in. Arthur had never been one to keep his sister or his friends abreast of the details of his relationships, and his something with Merlin had been no exception.
But at Morgana’s prompting, the entire story tumbled out of him as if he’d been aching to tell it. He told Morgana about their first hookup, and about how much he’d liked Merlin even then. He talked about the way they kept coming back together until they’d decided to stop having sex with other people. He talked about moving into Merlin’s flat, and how, after the initial panic, it had felt so right, so much like home. He talked about countless hours spent with Merlin – having dinner, watching movies, talking, and laughing.
Saying it all out loud, Arthur felt like a fool for not seeing it sooner.
When Arthur got to their last conversation a month ago, he faltered. He squeezed his eyes shut, the look on Merlin’s face playing on a loop in his mind. Hoarsely, he told Morgana about how Merlin had asked him about renewing his lease, about them finding a place together. And how Arthur had thrown it all back in his face by telling Merlin they were nothing more than friends with benefits.
Arthur looked up at Morgana, feeling lost. “He said he loved me, Morgana,” Arthur whispered. “And I let him walk away.”
Morgana rounded the island to Arthur’s side, tucking a comforting arm about his waist and leaning her head against his shoulder. “How do you feel about him?” she asked quietly. “If you could go back, would you stop him?”
Unexpectedly, Arthur felt tears prickling the back of his eyes. He swallowed hard, blinking the tears away before they could fall. “Yeah,” he said thickly. “Even then, I knew I didn’t want him to leave.”
“Oh, Arthur.”
Arthur slumped forward and dropped his head into his hands. “I’ve been such an arse. Merlin was right, even if I never said it, I treated him like a boyfriend.”
“You’re not an arse,” Morgana said, rubbing a soothing hand up and down Arthur’s back. It was perhaps the nicest thing Morgana had ever said. Arthur looked at her incredulously, and she pursued her lips. “All right, you were kind of an arse. But a willfully oblivious one. Which is marginally better than an intentional one.”
Arthur huffed a watery laugh. Morgana’s face twisted in sympathy.
“Oblivious is apt,” Arthur said wryly. “How did you know? About how I felt about Merlin, I mean. I didn’t even know.”
Morgana barked a laugh. “Arthur, you can’t hide anything from me. I knew the first time I met Merlin. You were so clearly besotted with him, and he was just as besotted with you. You looked at him like he hung the moon and the stars.”
Arthur groaned, carding a hand through his hair and tugging at the ends in frustration. “How could it be so clear to everyone else when I had no idea?”
“Well, you’ve never been the brightest.”
“Morgana!”
“Sorry,” she said with a shrug, only sounding the slightest bit repentant. “I shouldn’t tease while you’re miserable and pining.”
“I am not pining!”
Morgana raised a challenging eyebrow. “So you haven’t spent the better part of this last month thinking about Merlin?”
Arthur fell silent, pouting angrily.
Morgana’s expression softened, and she laid her head back down on Arthur’s shoulder. “What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know,” Arthur said forlornly. “What can I do?”
“That depends on what you want,” Morgana said, raising her coffee to her lips.
“I want Merlin,” Arthur whispered.
Morgana hid her smile behind her drink. “Good. He’s good for you. And I’ve never seen you happier.”
Arthur couldn’t help the smile tugging at his lips. “Yeah,” he murmured. “Yeah.”
“He’ll call,” Morgana said confidently. “He knows how much your mother’s ring means to you. Give him some time, and he’ll call.”
Arthur’s voice was small and uncertain. “And then what?”
“Then you get him back.”
--
It took three months, but eventually, when the thought of Arthur stopped feeling like a knife in the heart, Merlin picked up the phone and dialed Arthur’s number.
On the second ring, Arthur picked up. “Merlin?”
Merlin swallowed. “Hi, Arthur.”
“How - how are you?” Arthur asked hesitantly.
“Fine,” Merlin said, plowing forward before Arthur could interrupt. “Listen, you probably don't want to hear from me, but I thought I should tell you that you left your ring at my flat all those months ago. I’ll be home all day, so if you want it back... drop by whenever, all right?”
The answering silence stretched on. Merlin closed his eyes – the quiet breathing on the other end was his only indication Arthur hadn’t hung up.
Arthur’s voice was rough and breathless when he said, “All... all right. I’ll be there after work.”
“See you then, Arthur.”
--
Arthur dawdled outside Merlin’s flat, working up the courage to knock on the door. It felt surreal to be back at a place he’d once called home, but not know what he would find on the other side. Would Merlin be glad to see him? Had Merlin gotten over him? Was there anything left to be salvaged between them? Wiping sweaty palms on his trousers, Arthur rapped his knuckles against the door – once, twice.
A muffled curse came from inside, followed by the sounds of someone stumbling. A small smile curled Arthur’s lips. Merlin hadn’t changed, it seemed. When the door flew open, Arthur’s breath caught in his throat, his heartbeat suddenly too loud in his ears.
Merlin was dressed in pyjamas, hair tousled, clothes slightly askew. From experience, Arthur would bet he’d fallen asleep at his desk in the middle of writing. Before he moved out, Arthur would have come home to a quiet flat and tiptoed into Merlin’s office. He would have laid a gentle hand on Merlin’s head, running his fingers through his hair to coax him awake.
A wave of longing for that life slammed into Arthur, and he ached to reach out for Merlin.
“Hi there,” Merlin said, shooting Arthur a small smile.
“Hi,” Arthur smiled back, emboldened by Merlin’s lack of hostility, pleased and hopeful all at once.
“Please come in,” Merlin said. As Arthur stepped inside, Merlin padded away into the bedroom.
Glancing around the flat, Arthur noted how things had been rearranged, how Merlin’s clutter had filled all the empty spaces he had left when he’d taken his things. Merlin returned quickly, Arthur’s ring in hand, offered to him on an open palm.
Arthur scrambled for an excuse to delay, but he came up blank. Left with no choice, he accepted the ring, his fingers brushing Merlin’s skin as he picked it up. A jolt of electricity ran up Arthur’s arm, and Merlin snatched his hand back as if burned.
Merlin coughed awkwardly, a flush creeping up his neck. “You look well. I’m glad.”
“Thanks,” Arthur said, nervously turning the ring over in his hand before slipping it onto his finger. After three months, the way it fit felt foreign. He’d almost gotten used to not feeling it when he moved. Even the tan line had begun to fade. But it was a welcome relief to have it back, like something slotting back into place.
“You look good too, how’ve you been? Judging by your hair, did you fall asleep in your office again?” Arthur asked, careful to keep his tone light, a peace offering.
Surprise flickered across Merlin’s face. As quick as it appeared, it was smoothed away, replaced with an embarrassed twist of his lips and a twinkle in his eyes. Chuckling, Merlin raised a hand to rub at the back of his neck. “I did, I guess you would know. I’ve been productive lately, almost finished my most recent draft.”
Arthur perked up, interest piqued. “That’s brilliant. The one about ‘before the legends’?”
Merlin bit his lip and, after a beat, shook his head. “Ah, no... this is a new one. About, er, misunderstandings.”
At Merlin’s furtive glance, Arthur sucked in a breath, cottoning on to what Merlin was trying not to say – it was inspired by them. “Right,” Arthur said weakly, trying for a smile that he suspected came across as more pained than encouraging.
“I’m surprised you remembered,” Merlin said. "About my book, and about... well, my tendency to fall asleep at my desk.”
“I remember everything about you,” Arthur said softly.
Merlin forced a laugh and waved a hand in the air, as if it could diffuse the thick tension between them. “I didn’t know your memory was so good,” he said, tone half-heartedly teasing. “You’ve always been so forgetful, leaving something here almost every time you stayed over.”
Arthur froze, heat flooding his cheeks.
Merlin’s smile faded as Arthur’s silence dragged on. When Merlin opened his mouth to speak, Arthur cut him off, afraid of losing his nerve. “Do you know why I left my tie here the first time we met?” Arthur blurted out.
Merlin frowned, shooting Arthur a mystified look. “No? Why?”
“I wanted something to come back for.”
Merlin’s eyes widened, lips parting on a surprised exhale.
Arthur’s courage failed him. He averted his gaze, studying the patterns in the carpet as if he could divine meaning from them. Nervous, he darted a glance at Merlin’s shocked expression. “And I kept doing it to make sure I always had a reason to come back.”
Merlin snapped his mouth shut. “So that’s why you’ve been coming back all this time?” he asked, his tone on the edge of playful, but too shaky to be entirely convincing. “For your stuff? And here I thought it was because of how great I was in bed.” Merlin gave a crooked smile, fluttering his lashes in what Arthur could tell was a desperate attempt to lighten the mood.
Arthur faltered. It would be all too easy to hide behind the guise of banter, like they had so many times before. “No,” Arthur said instead, serious and earnest in equal measure. “I might not have realized, but it was always you I came back for.”
Merlin was struck speechless, the teasing edge in his expression giving way to something vulnerable. As if he was afraid of the answer, Merlin whispered, “Arthur. Why didn’t you take your ring with you?”
Arthur closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened them, Merlin was still there, all nervous energy and – dare he think it? – cautious hope. “I know I was the one who hurt you,” Arthur said haltingly. “But would you believe me if I said I still wanted something to come back for?”
Merlin swayed on his feet, a hand shooting out to steady himself on the back of the couch. “And now?”
Gathering up his courage, Arthur took a step toward Merlin. When Merlin didn’t back away, Arthur took another step. Then another until he had invaded Merlin’s personal space, close enough to reach out and touch.
Merlin stared as Arthur laid a gentle hand on his free arm. His throat worked, but no sound came out.
Encouraged, Arthur trailed his fingers down Merlin’s arm, delighting in the shiver he elicited. Merlin swallowed, and Arthur slipped his hand into Merlin’s hesitantly, questioningly. Merlin’s answer came in the form of his fingers tightening around Arthur’s.
Heart soaring, Arthur said, “I’m back, aren’t I? I don’t plan to leave again without something to come back for. If you’ll have me.”
Merlin’s breath left him in a whoosh. His legs wobbled and threatened to drop him to the floor, but Arthur was there to catch him, his hands curling around Merlin’s arms, steadfast and strong, holding him up.
“Arthur,” Merlin said, half pleading.
“Merlin,” Arthur breathed.
“You prat.” Merlin clutched weakly at Arthur’s shirt. “You never needed to leave something to come back for. All I wanted was for me to be enough.”
“You are,” Arthur insisted, grip firm and unyielding around Merlin’s arms. “You were right. I was a fool to ignore that what we had was real. That... that as much as I didn't want to admit it, I was your boyfriend, and you were mine.”
“Too little, too late, right?”
“Is it?” Arthur whispered, his heart twisting as he peered at Merlin’s face. He didn’t know if he could bear to walk away from Merlin a second time.
“Isn't it?” Merlin asked, voice barely audible.
“I heard what you said.”
“What?”
Arthur drew in a shuddering breath. “You said you loved me.”
Merlin flinched and looked away. “I was hoping you didn’t hear that,” he said softly.
“Did you mean it?”
As if the acknowledgment was being dragged out of him, Merlin nodded slowly. “Is this really necessary?”
“Only if it’s not too late.” Arthur shot Merlin a nervous look and sucked in a deep, fortifying breath. “I didn't think I could ever love someone, could ever be in love with someone. We never put a word to how we felt about each other, so I ignored my feelings, your feelings, all of it. This might not mean anything to you anymore, but when you told me you loved me, my entire world stopped. I've thought about you every day we’ve been apart, and Merlin, you... you were the best thing that ever happened to me. I know I probably fucked it all up, and I'll never find anyone like you again, but I loved you too, Merlin. More than I’ve ever loved anyone. More than I thought I could love anyone.”
Arthur waited with bated breath for Merlin to respond, the silence a deafening roar in his ears.
After what felt like an age, Merlin said, “You did fuck things up rather badly, you know.”
Arthur deflated, but there was something light in Merlin’s eyes that told him to hold his tongue and wait for Merlin to finish.
“You could’ve saved us a lot of trouble if you’d admitted that three months ago,” Merlin said, one corner of his lips quirking upward.
The beginnings of hope bubbled up in Arthur’s chest. “Are you saying it’s not too late?”
Merlin snorted. “I’m saying you’re an oblivious prat who’s very lucky I don’t hold grudges.”
Arthur offered a tentative smile, relief flooding through him when Merlin gave a small smile of his own. “Lucky enough for you to let me take you out on a second first date?”
Merlin’s smile faded, the light in his eyes dimming. He chewed on his bottom lip, hope and uncertainty warring for dominance on his face. His voice was low and serious when he said, “Arthur, I’m not doing the whole song and dance we did last time again. If we’re doing this, we’re doing it for real.”
Arthur nodded furiously, grabbing Merlin’s hands and twining their fingers together. “I know, Merlin,” he vowed. “I wouldn’t have said any of this if I wasn’t serious. I still love you, and I hope I can dare to presume you still love me too, even a little bit. I want to take you out on dates, to be your boyfriend. I want to share my life with you, to marry you one day, if that’s something you want too.”
An astonished look crossed Merlin’s face. He studied Arthur’s earnest expression, and what he found must have been enough. Slowly, astonishment melted into tenderness, and Merlin disentangled their fingers to loop his arms around Arthur’s neck. “You idiot,” he said fondly. “Here you are talking about marriage, and you ask me if you can presume I still love you?”
Arthur gave Merlin a bashful smile. “Well, can I?”
Merlin laughed softly. “Yes, to all of it,” he murmured, brushing his lips against Arthur’s cheek.
Arthur’s face lit up. He tugged Merlin into his arms, burying his face in Merlin’s shoulder. “I love you,” Arthur murmured, voice muffled by Merlin’s shirt.
“I love you too,” Merlin said, running a hand through Arthur’s hair, a happy smile playing on his lips. He joked, “You’re not going to be leaving some random item behind again, are you?”
Arthur huffed a laugh, pulling away to look into Merlin’s eyes. He brought up a hand to cup Merlin’s cheek, brushing his thumb over one cheekbone. “Not this time. That’s what I have you for, after all.”
Merlin’s eyes crinkled in a smile, and Arthur leaned in to press their lips together. Merlin’s mouth was soft and addicting, and Arthur was eager to relearn the taste and feel of him. The kiss felt at once familiar and new, the heady rush of love both terrifying and wonderful.
It felt like coming home.