Chapter Text
Zelda: Good morning, Sir Ingrid.
Sir Ingrid: Good morning, Your Highness.
Zelda: Good morning, Sir Link.
Sir Link: Good morning, Your Highness.
Zelda: I would like to take this moment to informally congratulate you on your ascension to Captain of the Princess Guard, Sir Link.
Sir Link: Thank you, Your Highness.
Zelda: You wear your new uniform well.
Sir Link: …thank you, Your Highness.
Zelda: I adore how the shade of your beret brings out your eyes.
Sir Link:
Sir Link: It’s standard issue, Your Highness.
Zelda: Your eyes are anything but standard, Sir Link.
Sir Link:
Zelda: I understand that I am to attend prayers this afternoon and that my morning is devoted to my studies. However, seeing that my tutors have given me leave to study independently today, I will inconvenience no-one should I choose to invert my itinerary. Therefore, I will be going to the chapel in one hour, and in the afternoon, I will be going to the Royal Ancient Lab. You will accompany me, yes?
Sir Link: [inclines head] Yes, Your Highness.
Zelda: Wonderful. I am looking forward to seeing you then. [returns to her room]
Sir Link:
Sir Ingrid: [smiling]
Sir Link: [glares]
Sir Ingrid: [stops smiling]
-
Zelda: I believe the first phase of my plan is bearing fruit!
Impa: …dare I ask what you’re up to this time?
Zelda: I do not like your regard, Lady Impa.
Impa: The last time you had one of your plans, Princess, I was covered head to toe in engine oil and Purah’s study was on fire.
Zelda: You’re leaving out a lot of context!
Impa: I have the right to be wary.
Zelda: Does that mean you don’t want to hear it?
Impa: I’d rather be prepared for another incident of arson.
Zelda: How rude. I can have you locked up for slandering the Crown!
Impa: Your Highness, the laws of the land are such that you can have me locked up for wearing big hair.
Zelda: Yes, the Decency Act is one of the first things I want to amend when my father deigns listen to me. The history behind them is also terribly unflattering—but that is beside the point. I’ve just the plan to get rid of my Appointed Knight!
Impa:
Zelda: Don’t look at me like that. It is utterly harmless. The aim is this: I shall shower him in affection and compliments every waking hour he is in my presence!
Impa:
Impa: ?
Impa: …how does that—?
Zelda: Isn’t it obvious? Over time, he shall become so disgusted with my attentions that he will seek reassignment on the Tabantha Frontier, and we will never have to see one another again until we are slated to battle Calamity Ganon! Isn’t it brilliant?
Impa: …what if he isn’t disgusted?
Zelda: Hm? Why wouldn’t he be?
Impa: Why wouldn’t—! Your Highness: you are intelligent, witty, and handsome royalty! It’s very likely he would be flattered!
Zelda: Hm, I can see your point. Anyone would be tempted for a chance to the Crown.
Impa: That is not at all what I said.
Zelda: [not listening] In that case perhaps it’s even better! Should he develop feelings for me, then we can court! And then the narrative will be that I, so uninstructed in the arts of love, break our hearts in the span of a day, and he chooses reassignment to the Tabantha Frontier and we will never have to see one another again until we are slated to battle Calamity Ganon!
Impa:
Zelda: Is it not brilliant?
Impa: I have reservations, Your Highness.
Zelda: You always have reservations. You are the most conservative woman on the planet.
Impa: I prefer the term cautious.
Zelda: Yesterday you were comparing the patterns of a tom that wandered onto the grounds with those of the Castle mousers’.
Impa: It could have been an intruder!
Zelda: The Yiga are employing cats now?
Impa: One day my caution—
Zelda: You mispronounced the word “paranoia”.
Impa: MY CAUTION will one day save your life and you’ll stop jeering me.
Zelda: My love: I will never stop jeering you.
Impa: [fighting down a smile and failing] Princess.
Zelda: [sobers mildly]
Impa: The Blood of the Goddess and the Goddess’ Chosen are partners against the resurgence of the ancient evil.
Zelda: “Partners”. Sir Link doesn’t even command Hyrule’s army.
Impa: Well, he made it to Captain of your guard at eighteen, I wouldn’t put it past him to make General before he’s twenty.
Zelda: He’s eighteen?
Impa: Youngest in the Imperial Guard.
Zelda: I thought he was twelve.
Impa:
Impa: Princess, you and Sir Link are fated to battle together. Driving a wedge between the two of you—resenting him so much that you wish him to fare in Tabantha—is counterproductive to your divine mission!
Zelda: Nowhere in any of the moth-eaten scriptures that you pine over does it say that the fated Hero and I need to be friendly.
Impa: Princess…
Zelda: Does a general need to be friends with the soldiers he commands in order to be good at what he does?
Impa: It helps if they at least trust each other.
Zelda: I trust that Sir Link will be more than competent in his skills of homicide when the machinations of Hylia call for it, and so too I shall be more than equipped to burn the scourge of evil from the surface of the world.
Impa: All of the ancient legends say that you seal it.
Zelda: All of the ancient legends didn’t have THIS!
Impa: What is—
Zelda: Watch!
Impa: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!
Zelda: I call it a flamethrower! The apocalypse won’t know what hit it! And when it is my turn, I shall look Ganon between the eyes—wait, do calamities even have eyes?—and I shall say—HEY!
Impa: I am confiscating this!
Zelda: On what authority?! You are my aide and advisor and very close to being demoted to ‘mildly annoying acquaintance’!
Impa: Where did you even get this thing?
Zelda: [with pride] I made it!
Impa:
Zelda: Please do not look at me like that.
-
Impa:
Sir Link: ?
Impa: [hands Link a very heavy case]
Sir Link: ???
Impa: Please hide this. Also note well that Her Highness is capable of manufacturing weapons of mass destruction on her bedroom vanity.
Sir Link: !!!!?!!
-
Zelda: [singing in deference to the wisdom of the goddess, washing her hands and head in the water of the chapel’s spring]
Zelda: [finished with her prayers, turns around] !
Link: [visibly disturbed]
Zelda: Sir Link? Are you alright?
Link: [goes blank faced, nods]
Zelda: …what was that face about? Do I sound so tone deaf that you can’t hide your expressions as you usually do?
Sir Link: [wide-eyed, panicked, hasty shakes of the head]
Zelda: No what? No, you cannot hide your expressions or no, I sound like a ruptured pipe organ?
Sir Link: [fretting, unsure of how to answer]
Zelda: [narrows eyes] You’re lucky you’re cute.
Sir Link: !!!!!
-
Director Purah: Oh snap! What a surprise! Royalty in my presence! [bows overdramatically]
Zelda: At ease, Director, I am only here to see if you are spending the Crown’s money sensibly. [sticks nose into the air] Indeed, I can make sense of nothing. You’ll have to find a new investor.
Director Purah: Stop that, your impersonation of your father gives me chills!
Zelda: [giggles] Do not speak poorly of your liege, Director. The walls have ears.
Director Purah: The walls already know that His Majesty doesn’t understand a fraction of what we’re rebuilding at these tech labs. What’s worse, he doesn’t care unless it has direct military application. I mean: he rejected our proposal to use Guardians to terraform Hyrule Field! I can’t believe he wasn’t at all swayed by the concept of yielding thrice as much grain and produce as we do now! Especially with the winters getting colder!
Zelda: In the face of the advent of Calamity Ganon, talk of the future must keep for when the future is secure.
Director Purah: Talk like that is what saps the people of hope.
Zelda: [smiles sadly]
Director Purah: Yeah, yeah, I got it. Anyway, who’s this? One of the walls you are talking about? Got the face of one.
Link: …
Zelda: This is my newly Appointed Knight. Sir Link, I’m sure you know of Director Purah, one of the foremost minds in the revival of Ancient Sheikah Technology?
Sir Link: [steps forward, nods, bows shallowly to Purah]
Director Purah: Huh. Nice to meet you, Linky.
Sir Link: [bows again]
Director Purah: You’re oddly straightlaced for an Imperial Guard. I’ve met a handful of them. They’re all kooks.
Sir Link: …
Sir Ingrid: [fighting down a grin]
Zelda: Sir Link is as rich in personality as the rest I assure you. I’m especially fond of his sarcastic silences!
Sir Link:
Purah:
Impa:
Sir Ingrid:
Zelda: Isn’t he charming?
Sir Link: [bows again, returns to his post, feeling awkward]
Director Purah: Well! Now that the socially stilted pleasantries are out of the way, tell me why you’re here or get out!
Sir Ingrid: [glances at Link, sees he’s not perturbed by Purah’s lack of propriety, returns to her vigil]
Zelda: I’ve come to ask how you intend to respond to the treatise on the correlation between Zonai architecture and ancient Sheikah shrines written by Doctor Calip—
Director Puah: CALIP!! Do not say that man’s name in my PRESENCE! That hair-brained Moblin-spawned fork-tongued blight upon the academic community has no respect for modern dating methods OR contrary archeological evidence OR BLASTED COMMON SENSE—
Zelda: I did find his claim that the Zonai coexisted with the Sheikah to be highly unplausible.
Director Purah: Unplausible?! It’s nonsensical! The Zonai existed at their height of their civilization for several centuries two thousand years following the collapse of the ancient Sheikah! What’s more, if they were as closely related as that halfwit Calip claims, then there would be some evidence of communion between the two cultures!
Zelda: He justifies that claim with the giant labyrinths in Deep Akkala and the North Hebra Snowfield.
Director Purah: He completely ignores that the ancient Zonai could have created structures around the shrines, just as the Hylians of several centuries ago built Hyrule Castle around the ancient Sheikah arena, and he CONVENIENTLY doesn’t mention any influence upon Sheikah culture that might have been adopted from the Zonai!
Sir Ingrid: [stifles a yawn, sneaks a peak at Link]
Sir Link: [listening to their discussion avidly]
Sir Ingrid: [marvels that he doesn’t find it all dull, tries to emulate him]
-
[in the library]
Zelda: [whispers] Sir Link!
Sir Link: ?
Zelda: I would like your permission to haze you.
Sir Link:
Zelda: When I was little I had very few friends my age, and I was the rumbunctious sort, if you can imagine.
Sir Link: [suppresses a smile]
Zelda: I would harass my guard to pass the time. Innocent harassment I assure you, if there ever was such a thing. You may ask them if you so desire, but I would like to restart that tradition with you.
Sir Link: ?
Zelda: I believe it will…bring us closer, as is necessary for us to…get along in the battle to come. [clears throat] Lady Impa believes so anyway.
Sir Link: …[nods]
Zelda: That is your permission? Excellent! Please take off your beret.
Sir Link: ? [obeys]
Zelda: Oh! Your hair is beautiful, Sir Link! Though the cut implies you don’t take as good care of it as you ought. At the same time, I like it. It gives you a roguish sort of look. A balance between duty and danger.
Sir Link: [shifts awkwardly]
Zelda: I’ve noticed too that your posture is impeccable. I sense you would make an outstanding dancer. Do you dance, Sir Link? You’ve my permission to speak freely.
Sir Link: [nods] I was taught all the formal dances, Your Highness.
Zelda: Truly? Is that standard practice for members of the Princess Guard?
Sir Link: No, Your Highness. I was taught because it was expected that I would one day dance with you.
Zelda:
Zelda: Oh.
Sir Link:
Zelda: Well, yes, hrm, I suppose that makes a fair amount of sense. Hm. The Goddess’ Chosen and the Goddess’ Blood tearing up the dancefloor makes for a powerful symbol in the face of overwhelming adversity. Or uncertainty.
Sir Link: [misinterprets Zelda’s self-inflicted frustration as resentment for him]
Zelda: [smiles suddenly] That day may yet come. Until then, hold still!
Sir Link: [wary]
Zelda: Oh, come now, don’t give me that look. When the fated day comes, will you be so mistrustful?
Sir Link: “Do not trust an unpenned bull.”
Zelda: I can’t tell if you’re calling me a cow or bullheaded.
Sir Link: !!!
Zelda: Oh, for heaven’s sake, get up. I am familiar with Hateno’s decorated arsenal of beef-related idioms. There is a questionable amount of them. Rise.
Sir Link: [rises warily]
Zelda: I am not offended. Rather, I am flattered by your fear. At the same time, I demand reparations for my slighted ego in the form of you staying still.
Sir Link:
Zelda: [pleased with his posture] Gorgeous.
Sir Link: [can’t meet her eyes]
Zelda: Ah! You’re balancing Doctor Robbie’s introductory text to Sheikah engineering marvelously! Let’s see how you fare against Professor Hino’s extensive catalogue of blood moons. Oh! Fantastic!
Sir Link:
Zelda: Give me your beret.
Sir Link: ? [obeys]
Zelda: It smells like you! And…something else, a sweetness that is familiar. Mm. What is that?
Sir Link: …palm nut tree oil.
Zelda: So it is! That’s what you use to oil your hair? [puts on beret]
Sir Link: !
Zelda: I feel spiffy.
-
Link: [to Epona’s nose] She knows what I smell like.
Epona: [lips at Link’s hip]
Link: No, you’re right, that’s a good point.
Stablemaster: …
-
Zelda: You see the trick is to be quirky enough to be interesting, but overwhelming enough to be off-putting!
Impa: I see. And what do you plan to do about—
Impa: Are you making another flamethrower?
Zelda: Of course not!
Zelda: I call it an icethrower. It works by compressing the—HEY!
-
Steward: You want to know where we can store the princess’ confiscated weapons?
Sir Link:
Steward: …I take it the armory is out of the question?
Sir Link: …
Steward: …will the pantry suffice?
Sir Link:
-
Captain of the Imperial Guard: How’re you finding the job, kid?
Link:
Captain: Sorry, Sir Link. I taught you how to use a bow, I forget that you’re gunning after my job.
Link: I don’t want your job.
Captain: You don’t want the thankless hours, endless paperwork, and anxiety as a constant companion?
Link:
Captain: No, you already deal with all of that. I guess it is you don’t want to step from the side of a certain princess.
Link:
Captain: Don’t glare at me like that, the whole Castle knows she’s sweet on you.
Link: ???
Captain: What’s that look for?
Link: …she hates me.
Captain: Rumour is it’s the opposite. Can’t go an hour without talking you up.
Link: She’s up to something.
Captain: She’s being nice to you.
Link:
Captain: True the fact was that in the beginning she resented the Hero of Hyrule, but it seems she changed her mind quick when she caught sight of your ‘non-standard’ eyes.
Link: [narrows eyes at Captain]
Link: She’s up to something.
Captain: All due respect to Her Highness, she’s a teenage girl with eyes in her head, of course she’s up to something.
Link: Not like that. She makes weapons in her bedroom.
Captain: Does she? Then thank Hylia she’s on our side!
Link:
Link: [squints at his reflection in his sucked clean spoon]
Captain: You’ve got pretty eyes, sir.
Link: Go away, uncle.
-
[in the ancient tech lab]
Zelda: Sir Link: I need you.
Sir Link: [steps forward from his post]
Zelda: I need a hand. Don’t look at me like that, I’ve no intention to lop it off. Ha ha, don’t tempt me. Come here. Hold this and pull. Take care now, I’ve no intention to cut you. Ready? Pull!
Sir Link: !
Zelda: Aha! Trust the finger strength of a swordsman! Now, let’s see what we’re dealing with here…
Zelda: Ahh, it’s just as I thought. It’s utterly gutted. You may remember, Sir Link, when Doctor Robbie had explained (after returning from his expedition in Akkala hunting for the fabled ancient furnace) that Guardians we are finding outside of what we have come to learn is their proper storage (within the mechanism buried beneath Hyrule Castle) were very likely to have been in the famous battle against Calamity Ganon ten thousand years ago.
Zelda: This is marvelous news because now that we know how to extract information from a Guardian memory core, we would be able to extract information from a ten-thousand-year-old witness to the previous battle. Isn’t that exciting?! We would have a first-hand account of what to expect of the future! No more relying on superstitious chancellors, odd fortune tellers, and faded tapestries. We would have a first-hand account on what to expect!
Zelda: However, that remains to be a pipe dream. Let me explain. Look here. You see this whitish-blue material that is coating everything? That is what is left of this Guardian’s coolant cables. [hands Link a tube] This is what they’re supposed to look like.
Sir Link: !
Zelda: We haven’t yet learned how to replicate it, but we know that they are capable of withstanding incredible heat and cold. The Guardians ran themselves into the ground and overheated to the extent that these materials liquified. The moment that happened it violated the core, rendering the mechanism inoperable.
Zelda: [sighs, rubs her forehead with the back of her hand smearing oil there] I would love to see a pristine Guardian core that bore witness to the old battle. Maybe one that was compromised in another way? But then would that one have been close enough to the battle for its data to be relevant? Ahhh, I need a break.
Sir Link: [offers her a canteen]
Zelda: Oh! I thank you, sir.
Sir Link: [shifts, then raises his hand]
Zelda: [arches brow] You’ve my permission to speak freely.
Sir Link: Why can’t you extract the memories of the battle from the cores of the Divine Beasts?
Zelda: !
Sir Link: [worried it was a stupid question but does not fidget]
Zelda: In the beginning that was our aim. The Divine Beasts, for all they were in great need of repairs, were in finer states than any other weapon of the era we’ve found. Unfortunately, they would not allow us to permanently register the new Champions with their preexisting cores. We took care when extracting them, but for some reason separating them from the Divine Beasts rendered them inert. They’re in storage now. It’s our secondary priority to figure out what caused their deactivation. I think that it’s a sort of fail-safe, but against what I can’t say.
Sir Link: [frowns in thought, but nods]
Zelda: [stares and smiles at him]
Sir Link: …?
Zelda: That was a good question, Sir Link.
Sir Link: ! [embarrassed, pleased, returns to his post]
-
King Rhoam: Ah, daughter. There you are—!
Sir Link: [CRASH!]
Imperial Guard: [shift to attention]
Sir Link: [scrambling to collect the books that toppled from his head when he bowed]
Zelda: [stifling her laughter behind her book]
King Rhoam: Sir Link. What is the meaning of this?
Zelda: [stands such that her skirts fall in front of Link] Please pardon my Appointed Knight, father. All he is guilty of is abiding by his duty.
Sir Link: [kneeling, books in a tidy pile on the floor beside him, trying not to feel embarrassed, is in fact very embarrassed]
King Rhoam: His duty is to ensure that you abide by yours.
Zelda: And so we have, father. What is this about?
King Rhoam: You are here, not at the Temple of Time where you are supposed to be supplicating.
Zelda: I had visited the Great Plateau in the morning, which bade me time to pay my respects and—
King Rhoam: That is not up to you to decide.
Zelda: [incredulous] My…it is not up to me how I spend my time?
King Rhoam: Your daily activities are painstakingly organized in accordance with every other duty and activity that happens in this castle. You are a cog in a complex machine at the heart of this kingdom. In changing your schedule, you upset the balance.
Zelda: I have done nothing to inconvenience anyone else. Everyone was informed of every deviance to my schedule—
King Rhoam: There should have been no deviances. You should not be here. Now. And Sir Link knows better than to encourage your flighty visits to the Ancient Tech Lab!
Zelda: Flighty?! I am staunch to my mission as any, father! My work has borne real, palpable results!
King Rhoam: That would be commendable if you were a scholar.
Zelda: I am—!
King Rhoam: You are the Princess of Hyrule, High Priestess of the Goddess Hylia and Crown Heir to the Throne. Where are the results befitting of your designation?
Zelda: !
King Rhoam: I do not want to hear that you are disregarding your duty again, Zelda.
Zelda: Of course, father.
King Rhoam: [remembers Link behind Zelda’s skirts] Nor do I want to hear of your Appointed Knight enabling you.
Sir Link:
Zelda:
King Rhoam: [leaves library]
Library: [uncharacteristically quiet]
Sir Link: [rises from his kneel hesitantly]
Zelda: Sir Link, please check out these tomes and take them to my study. Sir Ingrid will escort me to the chapel.
Sir Ingrid: Yes, Your Highness.
Sir Link: Yes, Your Highness.
-
Sir Link: [takes Zelda’s books to her study, takes a moment to admire her drawings and her awful penmanship, and the tanks she keeps of frogs and beetles, her smelly hanging plants, mechanical tools on her table to be cleaned, and a terrarium on the windowsill. This is the first time he’s seen inside her study: she usually lets no-one in.]
-
Captain: I heard you got chewed out by the king himself today?
Link:
Captain: Kid, what did you do?
Link: I let Her Highness invert her itinerary.
Captain: [sighs]
Link: I made the proper inquiries and got the confirmations. Everything was in order.
Captain: I’m going to tell you something you already know: Her Highness’ time isn’t scheduled for her benefit. It’s a matter of power.
Link:
Captain: The way I see it, ‘till she comes into her power, Princess Zelda has to be immaculate in every other way. It’s His Majesty’s way of preserving her reputation with the council.
Link: …
Captain: Why’d she want to invert her schedule anyway?
Link: Let’s her meet up with Director Purah.
Captain: That’s another strike. His Majesty doesn’t want her around the ancient tech. Or maybe it is he doesn’t want her around Sheikah. They’re conflated with the Yiga, and demonized a lot besides.
Link: Who cares about image at a time like this?
Captain: Sometimes all the lay folk have to go by is what is shown to them. Image has power. You think Her Highness would look at you twice if you weren’t pretty?
Link:
Captain: Yikes, if looks could kill.
-
Impa: [approaching Zelda’s door] ?
Princess Guard: [all balancing books on their heads]
Impa: ???
Zelda: [pokes her head out of her room] Who has my summary of medicinal plants found in the Oseira Plain?
Sir Seo: I do, Your Highness.
Zelda: [steals book from Seo] Thank you, Sir. Ah! Impa! Wonderful timing. I need someone to complain at. Come come come.
Impa: [points arbitrarily at her guard]
Zelda: What, have you never seen dapper knights in uniform before?
Sir Ingrid: [suppresses a grin, books on her head wobble]
-
Captain: You got the report on the anti-royalists?
Sir Link: [nods]
Captain: Good. Ears sharp, kid.
-
Zelda: [notices Sir Link and Sir Omari grimacing after overhearing her songs to the goddess, annoyed enough not to speak to them for the rest of the day]
Sir Omari: [wonders where he went wrong that the princess did not greet him as she usually does]
Sir Link: [accustomed to Zelda’s violent mood swings]
-
Sir Link: The weapons in the kitchen pantry are unrelated to the intruder.
Captain: Then what are they related to?
Sir Link: …
-
Handmaiden: We’re almost done, Your Highness.
Zelda: [reading] You said that two hours ago, Firly, but I appreciate your attempts to placate my impatience.
Other Handmaiden: You are magnificently patient, Your Highness. I had been lady in waiting to the Countess of the Scablands. She had insisted we finish her braids in an hour or less or be thrown through the door without as much as a recommendation.
Firly: I heard others say that she’s impatient and irrational. She pays well, though.
Other Handmaiden: She appreciates quality service, but she’s one of those noble types who is very aware of class and social quo, and doesn’t let anyone else around her forget it.
Firly: Not like our princess, eh, who let’s us gossip over her head like empty-headed songbirds.
Other Handmaiden: I don’t think Princess Zelda can hear us over the sound of her turning pages.
Zelda: Hm? What’s that? You called?
Other Handmaiden: [giggles]
Firly: It’s nothing, Your Highness. Safula is just being rude.
Safula: Begging your pardon, Your Highness. I was praising you for being engrossed in your reading.
Zelda: Oh, thank you! It’s riveting, I can’t put it down.
Firly: Is it a novel, Your Highness?
Zelda: [puts book down] No, it is a catalogue of medicinal herbs from Deep Akkala. In the past we welcomed many international ships on Hyrule’s eastern coast, and there are plants that sprouted in Akkala where our main trading port used to be that are seen nowhere else in Hyrule. Most suspect that they are endemic to foreign nations, carried here by accident on the laces of sailors or wedged in the bottom of their boots.
Firly: The seeds can be so tiny?
Zelda: [excited] Some you cannot see without a microscope!
Safula: Begging your pardon, Your Highness, but why do seeds interest you so much?
Zelda: It’s not the seeds as much as it is the story of how these medicinal herbs came here. We look around us and take for granted the multitude of accidents that substantiate our environment. Imagine if we had never traded with eastern countries. Would we have been able to successfully tend to the soldiers at the Akkala Citadel during the outbreak ten years ago? It was local healers who had held the fort until news reached Hyrule Castle.
Safula: From a distance I see you have plants in your study too, Your Highness. Are any of them from Akkala?
Zelda: No, none. I’ve tried convinced Sir Link to journey into Deep Akkala so that I can see the plants for myself and collect samples and pressings and see how they’re pollinated by the local fauna, but he’s refused so far. Some nonsense about herds of lynels seen in the area.
Firly: Your Highness! That’s not nonsense at all, lynels are terribly dangerous!
Safula: Aye, I lost my grandfather to a one. Trampled. Least it was quick.
Zelda: My condolences, Safula. I did not mean to make light of the danger. I just find it ridiculous that Sir Link of all people is put off from engaging with lynels. Why: his defeat of the lynel on Shatterback Peak is one of the reasons he’s so beloved in the Zora Domain. Did you know they gave him a Zora Helm? It’s said to be made of a real dragon scale!
Safula: [glances at Firly]
Firly: [catches the glance and smiles mischievously] You seem to hold Master Link in high esteem, Your Highness.
Safula: And well informed of his achievements as well.
Zelda: Not for a lack of trying on his part. If you were to ask him, he’d never as much as seen Shatterback Peak. His humility shames barn mice.
Safula: You talk, then? While you’re alone in the wilds with Master Link?
Zelda: Oh hardly. He has more to say to his steed—and mine—than he has to say to me. [turns a bit] Why do you ask?
Firly: [moves Zelda’s head back into position] Please do not move, Your Highness.
Safula: I ask, well, because you see, a lot of the staff were curious.
Zelda: Mhm? [opening book again] About what?
Safula: Well, about you and Sir Link. If there was a romance of the century in the works to rival the stories.
Zelda: I assure you, Sir Link behaves with the manners and nobility required of his statio—wait, what stories?
Safula: The novels, of course.
Zelda: About what?
Firly: That’s enough out of you, Safula. And Your Highness, if I have to fix your head one more time, I’ll turn half of your head into rope twists, see if I don’t.
Safula: Firly! You can’t threaten the Princess of Hyrule!
Zelda: On the contrary, Safula. There are only two people I consider higher than me: the Goddess Hylia, and the person who does my hair.
Safula, Firly, Zelda: [laugh until there’s a knock on the door and royal guards march in]
-
Zelda: Good morning, Sir Ingrid.
Sir Ingrid: Good morning, Your Highness.
Zelda: Good morning, Sir Link.
Sir Link: [bows head before he can get caught appreciating her hair]
Zelda: Non-verbal this morning? That is quite the shame. I was looking forward to listening to your melodious voice—
Link: !!
Zelda: —especially as you explained why it is that my father’s guards saw it fit to violate the privacy of my bedroom and study this morning.
Link:
Zelda: I am aware that writing reports is your job. I assume you have penmanship as impeccable and shrewd as your unparalleled combat ability.
Link: …
Zelda: However, I believe that for all you experiment with hyperbole and metaphor, describing my flamethrower and icethrower as “weapons of mass destruction” goes one step too far.
Sir Link: … [nods solemnly]
Zelda: …your diligence to duty is as unnerving as your beauty, Sir Link. I will have to learn to appreciate it.
-
Sir Ingrid:
Sir Link:
Sir Ingrid: I can’t tell if she likes you or hates you.
Sir Link: Be quiet, Sir Ingrid.
-
Link: You should have seen the way she looked at me.
Epona: [digs at his pockets]
Link: No, no, it’s not like that.
Stablemaster: …Master Link?
Link: [turns, nods]
Stablemaster: I regret to interrupt your…conversation, sir, but someone said to call you about the fire spitting machine you stored in the kitchens.
Link: ?
Stablemaster: Someone set the chancellor on fire, sir.
Link:
Stablemaster: Sir, I don’t like the chancellor either but if you could walk just a bit faster, please.
-
Impa: Sir Link. Good morning.
Sir Link: [nods]
Impa: I heard that you played an integral part in removing the anti-royalist threat the other day. Good work.
Sir Link: [nods]
Zelda: Don’t give him a big head, Lady Impa. He won’t be able to fit through the barn door, and then who will tend to his beloved horse and shame the mice?
Sir Link: …
Impa: Are you and Sir Link fighting again, Your Highness?
Zelda: Of course not. Fighting implies that there are two opponents. Sir Link won’t even enter the ring. [suddenly lobs an apple at his head]
Sir Link: [catches it, if barely] !!!
Zelda: Impressive, Sir Link. As usual.
Sir Link: [unsettled]
Impa: Your Highness! Did you aim for his nose on purpose?!
Zelda: Of course not. You know I have terrible aim.
Impa: You’re trained in archery!
Zelda: Do you see a bow and quiver on my person? I don’t.
Sir Link: [unsettled, pretending he’s not]
Sir Ingrid: [fighting down a grin]
Impa: I came to ask how you’re coping after the attack on Hyrule Castle.
Zelda: Hardly an attack. Just an overzealous activist with a flyer and impressive pair of lungs.
Impa: He was calling for your beheading.
Zelda: Was that what he was bellowing? You must forgive me: I speak eleven languages and “ignorant” is not one of them.
Sir Ingrid: [fighting down a grin]
Sir Link: [fighting down a smile]
Impa: Your Highness, it’s fine to admit if such an experience was startling.
Zelda: Yes, I am startled. I’m startled that there is a movement requesting the dissolution of the throne that has successfully led the country through natural disaster, war, and disease for centuries.
Impa: We have reason to believe that the Yiga’s counterintelligence is seeding Central Hyrule’s unrest.
Zelda: How lovely. I was looking forward to adding acts of domestic terrorism to today’s schedule.
Impa: I cannot tell if you are taking this seriously.
Zelda: Of course I am. I’m thinking of rounding up all the cats in Castle Town. Launch an inquiry. What do you think?
Impa: Your Highness, please.
Zelda:
Zelda: Pardon me, Lady Impa. I’m in short temper this morning.
Impa: By chance, a disagreement with His Majesty?
Zelda: How diplomatic you are. I’m sure the whole hall heard our raised voices.
Impa: If I may be so bold, may I act as confidant?
Zelda: I should be asking you that, darling.
Impa: I am always here for you.
Zelda: Yes. As is your duty.
Impa: As your friend.
Zelda: Does it ever bother you that you were employed exclusively for the purpose of making sure I grew up sane?
Impa: Being assigned to be your friend has been no hardship, Princess Zelda. I actively enjoy our time together.
Zelda: [tries not to tear up, loops her arm through Impa’s] My father’s racist council have gotten it into their heads that the Gerudo have something to do with the return of Calamity Ganon.
Impa: Why would they think that?
Zelda: Some nonsense about legends and a male Gerudo of the past being a self-fulfilling prophecy—you see that is the problem with taking cues from a moth-eaten tapestry. Now we’re throwing millennia old stories in each other’s faces and calling it truth. Madness.
Impa: And you spoke to your father about this.
Zelda: He says its none of my concern. None of my concern! As if I am not the Crown Heir to the throne due to work with these shallow fools within the decade!
Impa: Princess…do you believe that the Calamity is nigh?
Zelda: …I don’t want to believe it. However, empirical evidence is there. Monster populations have been increasing, blood moons—a phenomena we can’t explain—grow more frequent, and the patterns in the coding of the guardians we unearth match our needs and preparations almost exactly. Something is coming.
Zelda: And all I could possibly do is pray.
Impa: And visit the springs.
Zelda: Quite right. I will be journeying to the Spring of Courage this week. Sir Ingrid, you’ll join my party, yes?
Sir Ingrid: [glances at Sir Link, sees his short nod] Yes, Your Highness.
Zelda: How curious. Were you looking at Sir Link for confirmation or permission to speak?
Sir Ingrid:
Sir Ingrid: [glances at Sir Link because that is a trick question]
Sir Link: [ignores her look]
Zelda: If I were to order you right this minute to detain your captain, what would you do?
Sir Link: [stares at Sir Ingrid]
Sir Ingrid: I—I apologize, Your Highness.
Zelda: Surely you jest! I don’t believe what I’m hearing! You’d sooner heed the non-verbal command of your captain than a direct command from your princess? What respect you wield, Sir Link!
Sir Ingrid: [struggling to put away her grin] It’s not respect, Your Highness. It’s fear.
-
Zelda: [suddenly turns around on her way to her office]
Sirs Ingrid and Link: ?
Zelda: Sir Link, you may eat the apple you’re holding.
Sir Link: ??
Zelda: It is no secret that you are a growing young man with a ravenous appetite. I will never stop you from snacking.
Sir Link: [bows head in understanding, but has no intention of eating on duty]
Zelda: [stares at him, smiling expectantly]
Sir Link:
Sir Link: [produces apple from behind his back and takes a bite]
Zelda: [smiles] You look very handsome when you’re happy and full.
Sir Link: !!! [cannot meet anyone’s eyes, ignores Sir Ingrid’s grin for the rest of the day]
-
Zelda: [suddenly closes the book she was reading during her break]
Sir Link:
Zelda: Doctor Calip is very odd. He’s an example of how a little bit of knowledge can be a dangerous thing.
Sir Link: [glances at her]
Zelda: I think you will recall, given your tendency to eavesdrop—no don’t look so startled, if there was something I wished to keep private I wouldn’t discuss it in front of you—you might recall our second to last visit to the Ancient Tech Lab Director Purah’s tirade on Doctor Calip’s general incompetence?
Sir Link: [warily nods]
Zelda: Chief Urbosa jokes that science is just a bunch of people arguing with one another, and Princess Mipha compares it to the discussions of priests when it comes to the interpretations of ancient texts and holy scriptures. I deign admit there is enough similarity in the spirit of science and religion, that is, the quest for truth about the world. However, they are decidedly differentiated by the fact that one demands blind faith and the other demands inquiry.
Sir Link: [listening]
Zelda: Doctor Calip seems to fuse the worst parts of faith and science. He comes up with a theory, finds something to justify it, and takes his own word as gospel. I suppose we should simply be grateful that he isn’t charismatic enough to not have a following.
Sir Link: [loses the battle against his amused smile]
Zelda: Don’t smile, Sir Link. I just said an awful thing.
Sir Link: [tucks away his smile politely]
Zelda:
Sir Link: ?
Zelda: You have my permission to speak freely.
Sir Link: …?
Zelda: Tell me the truth. You resent me, do you not?
Sir Link: !
Sir Link: No, Your Highness.
Zelda: No? Then what am I to make of your perennial judgmental silences?
Sir Link: I…? I—I apologize, Your Highness, but you are wrong.
Zelda: [arches a brow] Pray tell.
Sir Link: I’ve never criticized you, aloud or otherwise.
Zelda: Pity, then.
Sir Link: No, Your Highness.
Zelda: I wouldn’t blame you. I’d rather you tell me the truth. I cannot stand to have someone who loathes me in close and constant proximity.
Sir Link: I don’t—Your Highness, I like you.
Zelda: [smiles tellingly]
Sir Link: [pretending not to be embarrassed, is in fact very embarrassed]
Zelda: If that is your truth, then I am flattered, Sir Link. I am…not unfond of you either, after a fashion.
Sir Link: [trying not to smile, is in fact very pleased]
Zelda: Though I doubt it would do to hear as much coming from me. By the way my ladies in waiting tell me, you’re quite the belle of the ball as it were among the castle staff—oh my? What was that wince for?
Sir Link: Nothing, Your Highness.
Zelda: No, no, please tell me. What had I said?
Sir Link:
Sir Link: I do not…like how other people talk about me. That’s all.
Zelda: You mean the way I talk about you?
Sir Link: ?
Sir Link: No, Your Highness.
Zelda: Oh? But I…I make reference to your beauty almost every day.
Sir Link: It’s not the same, Your Highness.
Zelda: How so?
Sir Link: …
Zelda:
Sir Link: …they talk about what I can do for them. You talk about me as I am.
Zelda: [weirdly pleased] Oh.
Sir Link: [shifts slightly]
Zelda: I assume you are sanitizing the description for my benefit.
Sir Link: [avoids her eyes]
Zelda: [resignedly giving up on her plan to disgust him with affection] You are worth more than that, Sir Link. I hope you know.
Sir Link: [loses the fight against a small delighted smile]
-
[in the Royal Ancient Tech Lab]
Sir Link: [standing in his corner]
Zelda: [tinkering with something involving chemicals, a face mask, and goggles]
Tech Assistant: H-hello, Sir Link, how are you today?
Sir Link: … [nods]
Tech Assistant: Um, well, some of the girls and I, we know you have evenings off on weekends, we were wondering if you wanted to have a drink with us? [touches his elbow]
Sir Link: [stiffens]
Zelda: [suddenly, loudly] Sir Link I need you to brace this for me.
Sir Link: [practically leaps at the opportunity to help]
Tech Assistant: [waits a bit, but Zelda doesn’t release Link from duty, ultimately leaves]
-
[heading back to the palace]
Link:
Zelda:
Link: Thank you, Your Highness.
Zelda: I have no idea what you’re talking about, Sir Link. How odd you are.
Link: [smiles at her back]
-
[on the road to the Spring of Courage through the Faron Rainforest]
Zelda: Sir Omari.
Sir Omari: Your Highness.
Zelda: I would like your permission to haze you. You may speak freely, and you may decline.
Sir Omari: Oh. [turns to see Sir Link staring at him, startles] It would be an honor to be hazed by you, Your Highness.
Zelda: [turns in her saddle to glare at Link]
Link: [pretends not to notice, eyes their environment]
Zelda: I would like you to tell me why it is that the Princess Guard defer to the implied orders of their captain more than they heed my direct commands.
Princess Guard: [amused grimaces, ungraceful coughing, uneasy laughs]
Zelda: I…seem to have touched upon a nerve. What is the story here?
Sir Omari: Er, well, there are several stories, Your Highness. Um—[looks over his shoulder]
Zelda: Sir Omari do NOT look at Sir Link!
Sir Omari: Well, I, er, hmg. [feels Sir Link staring at him]
Zelda: Sir Link!
Sir Link: Your Highness.
Zelda: Stop intimidating my guard!
Sir Link: Yes, Your Highness.
Sir Seo and Sir Ingrid: [muffled and suppressed smiles]
Zelda: Honestly! Does Sir Luka command the Imperial Guard the same way?
Sir Kyle: You’d be surprised by how much they have in common, Your Highness.
Sir Link: [clears throat]
Sir Kyle: [sits stiffly in his saddle]
Zelda: Oh—this is ridiculous! Sir Link.
Sir Link:
Zelda: I have come to learn that over the duration of our stilted acquaintance you are a man of significant skill but I have yet to hear from end to end an anecdote that can attest to your ability to swing like a Goron, swim like a Zora, and strike true like a Rito.
Sir Link: …?
Zelda: I’ve already seen your ability to strike fear like a Gerudo. [waves a hand arbitrarily at her retinue]
Sir Seo: [turns his smile into his collar]
Zelda: I would like to hear one story about you, please. Preferably from the uncoloured vantage of your peers.
Sir Link:
Sir Link:
Sir Link: Sir Omari.
Sir Omari: Sir!
Sir Link: Go ahead.
Sir Omari: Oh! Yes, sir!
Zelda: Why thank you, Sir Link! You are as generous as you are over competent!
Sir Link: [suppresses a long-suffering sigh]
Sir Omari: Mm, a good story of why we’re afraid of Sir Link…oh! How about what happened at Deya Village?
Sir Seo: That’s a good one.
Sir Kyle: Excellent example.
Sir Link: …
Zelda: What happened at Deya?
Sir Omari: Well, I wasn’t there myself though I know the story, Sir Seo and Sir Ingrid were. By your leave, Highness, Sir Link, they can tell parts of it better than I can.
Sir Link: [nods]
Zelda: Yes, go ahead.
Sir Omari: Alright. So in the beginning, there was—pardon my language—this bastard of a knight.
Sir Ingrid: [strikes Sir Omari]
Sir Kyle: Not even a minute into the story and you’re already cussing in front of the princess?
Zelda: I find it gives the story character.
Sir Seo: Even so, Your Highness, he knows better. Keep it clean, Sir Omari.
Sir Omari: Yes, sirs. Begging your pardon, Highness. But that’s the long and short of this knight. I guess he wasn’t too bad with a sword either, otherwise more folk would’ve had grievances with him, but he was just out for the glory.
Sir Kyle: Plenty of folk like that. They want the prestige.
Sir Omari: And this knight had it in his fool head that pages were sanctioned slaves. He snapped up Sir Link as one. Ran him through the wringer.
Zelda: I’m not sure I understand.
Sir Seo: A knight is supposed to train their page, Your Highness, to show them what it means to live by the code of conduct and the like. This ba—this fool knight only cared after Sir Link insofar as how shiny he kept his boots and armor and how happy he kept his horse.
Sir Omari: Sir Link took it without a word of complaint though. Did everything to the T. Never once said that it was a waste of his talents, though everyone could see plain as day it was.
Zelda: And why didn’t anyone report this injustice?
Princess Guard: [uncomfortable shuffling]
Zelda: Please tell me? I am not fond of being ignorant.
Sir Link: Many people didn’t like me, Your Highness. They thought my treatment was deserved.
Zelda: People didn’t like you?! But you are the Hero of Hyrule! The savior reborn!
Sir Ingrid: He was an upstart at the garrison, begging your pardon, Sir Link. He could disarm six seasoned soldiers cold out of his bed.
Sir Seo: And he rarely spoke.
Zelda: He rarely speaks.
Princess Guard: [good natured laughing in Sir Link’s direction]
Link: [watches their environment]
Sir Ingrid: No-one likes a show off, begging your pardon, Sir Link.
Sir Kyle: Sir Link is as humble as they come, though. Annoyed our dear knight to no end too.
Sir Omari: Yeah, this guy was determined to break Sir Link’s spirit. So he carts them down to Deya, which is Sir Link’s hometown.
Zelda: I thought Sir Link was from Hateno.
Sir Kyle: Sir Link, weren’t you born in Goponga?
Sir Ingrid: No, he was born in Tabantha Village.
Princess Guard: [look at Link for clarification]
Link:
Zelda: [sighs] At the rate this story is going I wouldn’t be surprised if he sprung from the earth fully formed.
Princess Guard: [good natured laughter]
Sir Omari: The way I know it, he’s from Deya, and still has folks there. ‘Cept the minute they arrive, no-one cares that Sir Link’s just a page instead of a knight in his own right. They’re just too happy to have someone deal with their Talus problem.
Zelda: A talus?
Sir Ingrid: Mean monsters, Your Highness. Thinking rocks tall as a house and thrice as broad, will lay you flat in a single hit shield or no shield. They’re nasty.
Sir Kyle: It can take up to a squadron of six experienced soldiers to take one down.
Sir Omari: But this knight only had himself, one weapon, a horse, and Sir Link.
Zelda: Oh? I thought Sir Ingrid and Sir Seo were present?
Sir Ingrid: We were, Your Highness, but that fool knight told us to hang back and that he would deal with it himself.
Zelda: Did you?
Sir Ingrid: Of course not, we snuck up to watch!
Sir Seo: That was how we knew it wasn’t one talus—
Sir Omari: It was TWO!
Zelda: Goodness!
Sir Omari: See our fool knight knew full well how good Sir Link was, and set things up so Sir Link could take all the risk while he himself took all the glory. He set on his horse and told Link that he ought to take care of the talus.
Zelda: By himself!? [looks at Link]
Sir Link: [staring an inconspicuous foliage]
Sir Omari: Sounds like a fool errand, and had it been anyone it would’ve been. But Sir Link step to it without even blinking. He hunt down that talus like a bloodhound hunting a bleeding rabbit and took it out with eight arrows and six great slaps to its ore. Thing wasn’t even fully out of the ground ‘fore it had this little kid running up and down its spine!
Zelda: Little kid? How old was Sir Link at the time?
Sir Ingrid: Sir? Fifteen?
Sir Link: [distracted] Fourteen.
Zelda: Fourteen years old…that man had sent Sir Link to his death!
Sir Seo: Or he tried to, anyway.
Zelda: Wait, what about the second Talus?
Sir Omari: [grins hugely] Oh, that’s the best part. See our sorry sod of a knight was decked out in his livery and on his horse on a nearby hill invigilating the whole thing, right? He was in the process of telling Sir Link to gather up all the opals and amber that fell out of the beast so he could buy any witness’ silence. That’d be Sir Seo and Sir Ingrid here. But all his yelling woke the next talus—the same hill he was set on!
Zelda: [gasps]
Sir Ingrid: His horse is smarter than him. Takes off and leaves him—[cuts off at the sound of a bow being pulled taut]
Sir Link: [sets loose an arrow between the eyes of a forest orotorock]
Sir Link: Flank the princess. Eyes and ears open.
Princess Guard: Sir!
Sir Link: Sir Omari.
Sir Omari: Sir!
Sir Link: You can continue, but stay vigilant.
Sir Omari: Yes, sir. Um. Where were we?
Zelda: The horse took off from beneath our sorry sod of a knight. [grins]
Sir Omari: Ha, yeah. So the next thing is this fool knight in all his livery scrambling at the top of this waking talus screaming to high heaven—how’d you describe the sound last time, Sir Seo?
Sir Seo: Banshee shriek of a Mabe Prairie dog in heat.
Princess Guard: [muted sounds of amusement]
Zelda: Oh my. But surely his position must have allowed him access to the exposed ore, the weakness that Sir Link had exploited not a moment before?
Sir Omari: Our fool knight was too high in a panic to tell his ears from his toes much less which way to strike his claymore true. One minute he was airborne, the next he’s crashing in a bed of diamonds and sapphires.
Zelda: [winces in sympathy]
Sir Seo: You don’t need to feel sorry for the sod, Your Highness. His armor wasn’t shiny after the fiasco, but it did its work protecting his fool spine.
Sir Ingrid: [snorts] What spine?
Sir Seo: Heh.
Zelda: So the talus were defeated.
Sir Omari: Sure were. Sir Link gathered up all the ore like our fool knight told him to, ‘cuz whenever we come into the possession of spoils like that we’re supposed to turn it in, y’know? We’d get benefits or raises or leave or promotions accordingly. But our fool knight was about to use it for the purpose of sealing Sir Ingrid and Sir Seo and Sir Link’s mouths shut, then palming the rest.
Zelda: [frowns]
Sir Ingrid: Happens often, Your Highness, a platoon come across a monster like that, they either have to choose between keeping the spoils or reporting the monster. Not reporting the monster comes with serious reprimands, but you report it you might end up with rewards worth less than the spoils. For some it’s an easy choice.
Zelda: And was it an easy choice for you?
Sir Ingrid: Easiest yet. Our fool knight tosses an opal at me and I toss it right back, right between the eyes. Ha! I wish I could show you his face, Your Highness. He looked like a stupefied bokoblin!
Sir Seo: Sir Ingrid cut a noble figure in the light then. Her words were pure, “I will be happy to write the report since you’re so happy to hold the ore.”
Zelda: Bravo.
Sir Ingrid: [blushes] Hardly as erudite as some of our present company, but it got the meaning across. Our dear knight blubbered between the two of us and realized we were going to tell our superiors everything, from how Sir Link shone his helmet this morning to how Sir Link shot the impossible shot and saved his ungrateful hide.
Zelda: What’s become of the man now?
Sir Seo: Dishonorably discharged.
Sir Kyle: And good riddance!
Zelda: And what was it about Sir Link’s performance that won your respect that day?
Sir Ingrid: Not respect, Highness. Fear.
Zelda: ?
Sir Ingrid: See, when I say that it takes six to twelve seasoned hunters to take out a single talus I mean it, Your Highness. I wasn’t dressing up the story to make Sir Link look good. A fourteen-year-old boy took out two taluses, in quick succession, in under an hour and didn’t as much as flinch under the months of verbal abuse he received under that fool knight. Plenty of us thought he was empty-headed, but just then Sir Seo and I could see it was anything but: Sir Link was biding his time.
Sir Seo: Like a predator in wait.
Zelda: !
Sir Ingrid: I wasn’t going to end up in the bad books of a man like that.
Zelda: And is that…sentiment…common in the Princess Guard?
Sir Kyle: Different stories behind each of us, Your Highness, but the long and short of it is something of the same.
Sir Omari: Don’t get us wrong, Your Highness. Sir Link has our respect. He’s a good leader and a good trainer too. But we also know he’s not one to be trifled with.
Zelda: [eyeing Link] I see.
Link:
Zelda: Page at fourteen, Captain of the Princess Guard at eighteen. You’re quite the upstart, Sir Link.
Link: [unsure of how to reply, doesn’t]
Sir Omari: We’ve a bet pool running, Your Highness.
Sir Ingrid: [smacks his pauldron] What’re you doing talking about that discourteous rot in front of the princess?!
Zelda: You’ve my curiosity now, you must tell me.
Sir Seo: Well…among the castle guard—though I heard someone bet from Fort Kolomo—we’re betting when Sir Link makes general.
Zelda: Oh? I remember Lady Impa conveyed unsurprise if he should make general before he’s twenty.
Sir Seo: A lot of the bets are going that way, Your Highness.
Sir Omari: Are you interested in joining the running, Your Highness?
Sir Ingrid: Clearly hitting you isn’t instilling what’s the right and wrong thing to stay in front of royalty.
Zelda: Never fear, Sir Ingrid, I will be prudent in expressing whenever I feel offended. And to answer your question, Sir Omari, I do not think I will. I sense that no matter what we bet, Sir Link will surprise us, as he always has.
Princess Guard: [turn curious surreptitious look to Sir Link]
Link: [ignores them]
-
Captain of the Temple of Courage: Good afternoon, Your Royal Highness. Welcome to the Temple of Courage. I am Captain Sipho.
Zelda: Good afternoon, Captain Sipho. Thank you for receiving us. My guard tells me that the roads on the way here were unusually clear. I assume we have you and your men to thank for that?
Captain Sipho: [posture straightens in pride] Indeed, Your Highness.
Zelda: I thank you profoundly, captain. It must have been hard work. Any casualties?
Captain Sipho: Six injured but nothing life threatening. An electric wizzrobe got the best of us at the end of a long day.
Zelda: I’m terribly sorry to hear it.
Captain Sipho: Thank you, Your Highness. Um. If it isn’t too forward, the men would appreciate a visit, if you could spare the time. It would pick up their spirits.
Zelda: I would be honored. I will see to that as soon as I convene with the Holy Mother.
Captain Sipho: Thank you, Your Highness. Holy Mother Rola is right this way.
Sir Link: [signs instructions to Sir Ingrid and Sir Mauv, escorts Zelda with Sir Omari]
Holy Mother Rola: Good afternoon and blessings upon you, Your Royal Highness.
Zelda: And you, Holy Mother.
Holy Mother Rola: [embraces Zelda]
Link: [flinches]
Rola: You are growing into a fine young woman, Princess Zelda.
Zelda: [melts] I wish my power would grow as I do.
Rola: It will come. Whatever the machinations of Hylia, you doing what you are supposed to do will see your power bloom according to Her will.
Zelda: You’ve said this before, but it’s been years. I’ve prayed from sincerity, from desperation, from fear, from—from anger, sometimes. My powers refuse to manifest no matter what facet of myself I show to Hylia.
Rola: I sense that priesthood is not the role the Goddess had in mind for you.
Zelda: !
Zelda: You’ve said that before too. But all of the firstborn of my bloodline has a connection to the Goddess. How can I be the only one without?
Rola: You already have that connection, child. It is in growing into yourself, the self that you choose to nurture, that will enlighten us to the Goddess Hylia’s Will and Way.
Zelda: [not comprehending] Yes, Holy Mother. Regardless, I am here to pray.
Rola: [cups her cheek] A room is prepared for you, as well as a bowl of fruit to keep you, should you desire to begin your prayers right away.
Zelda: Thank you, Holy Mother, and I will, but I would like to see the brave men and women who helped clear the way for my coming. I hear that some of them are injured.
Rola: Yes. We can see them now if you like.
Zelda: Please.
Link: [signs to Sir Omari to wait beside the door on the outside of the room, Sir Link waits on the inside]
Zelda: !
Zelda: How long ago was the attack?
Rola: One week before—
Soldier: Who is that? Who’s there?! [obviously panicked]
Rola: [holds the hand of a reclining soldier] Easy, Michael. You are among friends. You have a visitor.
Soldier Michael: Who…?
Rola: [indicates for Zelda to come forward. She does, and Michael’s hand snags her wrist]
Link: [twitches]
Zelda: [heard Link’s chainmail, puts up a hand to belay him] Good afternoon, Michael. I am Princess Zelda. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance.
Michael: [releases her] Your Royal Highness! I beg your pardon!
Soldiers in room: [try to pay respects as well as their injuries allow]
Zelda: At ease, please, all of you. I have come to thank you all for making my journey here so safe. Who knows what would have happened without your bravery.
Soldiers: [murmuring, abashed toe-shuffling]
Soldier: Anytime, princess!
Zelda: !
Room: [sounds of amusement]
Rola: Please forgive Enola, Your Highness. We have her on a very strong medication.
Zelda: [giggles] It’s quite alright. Michael, was it? I sense that you would feel better holding the hand of someone near to you. Am I right?
Michael: Y-yes, Your Highness. But I would never—!
Zelda: [holds his hand] You ensured that I felt safe on my way here. Allow me to return a fraction of the favour.
Michael: [blushing under his bandages] Thank you, Your Highness. Mi-might I say, if it isn’t rude, you have a soothing voice, Your Highness.
Zelda: [surprised by the forwardness of the soldiers, glances at Rola]
Rola: [unconcerned, busy looking at the bandages of another soldier]
Zelda: Why thank you, Sir Michael. I am told that very rarely.
Michael: [smiles] I gotta have a keen ear since I can’t see.
Rola: [not looking up from her work] It is temporary, Michael. You will see again.
Michael: [silent and unconvinced]
Zelda: …hm, there is a knight among my Princess Guard who only has one leg.
Michael: Really?!
Zelda: It’s true! Sometimes I overhear Sir Omari shout “ah, my leg!” and then I hear screams from the newly employed scullery maids. Awful man.
Room: [breaks up in genuine laughter]
Sir Omari: [flattered, didn’t know Zelda noticed]
Zelda: And there is no-one, perhaps save for one or two, who has a keener eye, straighter arm, or truer aim than he.
Rola: You will recover, Michael.
Michael: [vulnerable] Thank you, Your Highness. Holy Mother.
Enola: Princess! You know the Hymn of Farosh?!
Rola: Another outburst from you Enola and I’m bandaging your mouth shut next!
Enola: Oops. Sorry, Holy Mother. Sorry, princess.
Zelda: It’s quite alright, but you can’t be requesting me to sing, are you?
Room: [rapturous encouragement]
Rola: [exasperated with the room’s lack of decorum but equally as fond]
Zelda: I should tell you that I am a very poor singer—
Rola: You are humble, Your Highness.
Zelda: You flatter me, Holy Mother.
Soldier: [whispers] If she don’t want to sing don’t force her.
Zelda: [senses the vitality of the room fade] Oh, I, well if you insist, I can sing you one verse. But don’t say I didn’t warn you!
Room: [happy cheer]
Link: [braces self]
Zelda: [sings]
-
Holy Mother Rola: Thank you for eating among everyone tonight. I know it is not your favourite pastime.
Zelda: ?
Zelda: I always try to interact with my subjects.
Rola: I know you do, child. I also know you like your solitude.
Zelda: …
Zelda: I think you, my mother, Lady Impa, and Urbosa are the only people to have ever paid such keen attention to me.
Rola: You discredit your Appointed Knight.
Zelda: Excuse me?
Rola: Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed. Not a minute goes by his eyes aren’t on you.
Zelda: [cannot place Rola’s tone] My safekeeping is his occupation.
Rola: In a room ram jam of trained soldiers, he felt you weren’t safe?
Zelda: I cannot speak for his motivations. He is an enigma.
Rola: He is simpler than that.
Zelda: I suppose the world is simple to a woman of your wisdom.
Rola: Are you calling me old?
Zelda: Goddess forbid the thought.
Rola: [laughs]
Zelda: [smiles]
Rola: …he’s good looking.
Zelda: [looks up and around them] Huh? What? Who?
Rola: [smiles knowingly]
Zelda: Oh goodness, are you really going on about my Appointed Knight? What in the world for? Do you fancy him?
Rola: Which woman or man with eyes in their head wouldn’t?
Zelda: I can perhaps put in a good word for you, but don’t hold your breath over any nuptials. You will utter your vows and he will maintain his vows…of silence.
Rola: [giggling] You’re so catty.
Zelda: [smiles]
Rola: Lady Impa sent me a letter illustrating some nonsense about you seducing the boy for the express purpose of having him reassigned to the most remote region in Hyrule.
Zelda: That is a gross extrapolation and I do no appreciate your implications, Holy Mother.
Rola: Then correct me where I am wrong.
Zelda: First of all, I am not seducing. A princess would never engage in so unsporting an act.
Rola: Some would argue that seducing is the sport.
Zelda: [shocked] Holy Mother!
Rola: [waves at her to continue]
Zelda: Second of all, even if I were to preoccupy myself with the reprehensible pastime of seducing my Appointed Knight, I am familiar enough with what gives him pleasure to know that nothing would turn his head half as much as a Rito hearty salmon or Gerudo prime poultry pilaf or gourmet Lurelin beef and Kakariko pumpkin stews!
Zelda: Or a horse.
Rola: [stifles a smile in her fist]
Zelda: Third of all, it was not my express purpose to see him reassigned, it was my intent that he would request to be assigned, voluntarily, that is, of his own volition, by his leave—
Rola: I heard you.
Zelda: —and not because it was by my order. Now that would be unsporting!
Rola: Naturally.
Zelda: You’re making fun of me.
Rola: You can tell?
Zelda: …I believe you’re one of the few that can get away with addressing me in such a way.
Rola: I believe that I am one of the few capable of treating you as what you are.
Zelda: And pray tell what am I?
Rola: A bright and silly teenage girl.
Zelda:
Rola: I promised Lady Impa that I would do my part in making you see that this venture is folly.
Zelda: Because the Goddess’ Blood and Choice are partners against Calamity.
Rola: So say the scriptures.
Zelda: Ugh.
Rola: And, also, because you taking out your resentment for the order in which the Goddess’ Hylia’s plans are coming to fruition on a young man who is unworthy of your wrath is unfair.
Zelda:
Zelda: You needn’t chastise me further.
Rola: No?
Zelda: Over time I have come to learn, begrudgingly, about my Appointed Knight.
Rola: Clearly, the way you rattled off his favourite meals.
Zelda: Hush.
Rola: [chortles]
Zelda: I am able to admit that I was…hasty in my original judgement.
Rola: [amused] Oh. You like him.
Zelda: [hastily] I would not go that far.
Rola: Mm.
Zelda: But it is not too far off to say that there is potential for an amicable interaction to form in the future.
Rola: Hm.
Zelda: I do not like him.
Rola: I didn’t say anything.
Zelda: I know what you said.
[Zelda and Rola walk in amused silence around the temple for a bit longer, watching the stars through the foliage and hearing the distant howl of monkeys]
Rola: You know, some old scriptures said that the Blood and the Chosen were lovers as well.
Zelda: Holy Mother!
Rola: What? The Goddess made love and sex as much as she made the sky and soil.
Zelda: That is not what I am protesting!
Rola: [willfully misunderstanding her] Are you forgetting I was once married? Such things are a part of life, child, there’s no need to be ashamed.
Zelda: I had forgotten you were once married. I am sorry for your loss.
Rola: Oh, he’s not dead.
Zelda: Oh?
Rola: No, he left me for ten others.
Zelda: Ten?! My goodness!
Rola: There was no way I could compete with their plumage.
Zelda: He…left you for a harem of Rito?
Rola: He left me for a coop of cuccos.
Zelda: [pauses for the punchline, despairs when she realizes Rola is serious]
Zelda: I…I am sorry for your loss, Holy Mother.
Rola: I’m not.
-
Sir Mauv: Sir Link, erm.
Sir Link: ?
Sir Mauv: Her Royal Highness created a giant sling shot during lunch today, sir.
Sir Link: [stands up from his meal and takes off at a brisk walk]
Sir Mauv: [following] Sir Omari went off to find her yellow chu chu jelly as ammunition.
Sir Link: [breaks into a jog]
-
Sir Omari: [getting chewed out and smacked by Sir Ingrid]
Sir Link: [watching the makeshift slingshot in incredulity]
Zelda: I suppose you’re going to report this as another ‘weapon of mass destruction’ too!
Sir Link: [gestures to the self-explanatory basket of stunned Tireless Frogs]
Zelda: It’s not a threat to people!
Sir Seo: [yelps when one of the chu chu jellies bursts in his hands]
Sir Link:
-
Rola: Is the girl still praying?
Link: [nods]
Rola: [brushes past him and wades into the spring water] Enough of that now, child. Your piety is unquestionable, but you’re not going to solve anything if you make yourself sick.
Zelda: [genuinely confused] It’s only been three hours, Holy Mother.
Rola: Three hours! Three hours of sitting in this pool and having your head full of nothing but hymn and scripture! You are mortal. Eat. Rest. Harass your guard again like you did at lunch.
Link: [shifts]
Zelda: My father would say I should spend every waking hour to my training.
Rola: I know the stakes are steep, Your Highness, but you’re not hearing me: you serve no-one and nothing if you are ill. Please. You are finished at the Spring of Courage. You’ll injure your skin.
Zelda: My skin is of little importance.
Rola: Don’t say that! A pretty young woman like you ought to be a little vain about her appearance, come on!
Zelda: Ha. I’m told ten times a day I am beautiful, you’ll pardon me if it starts to sound like people are trying to convince themselves more than they’re trying to convince me.
Rola: Now that’s just—then you need to hear it from someone who CAN’T lie to you! Sir Link!
Link: ?!
Rola: Isn’t Her Highness a handsome woman?
Zelda: Holy Mother…
Link: [studiously not looking at Zelda] The code of conduct that I abide by strictly prohibits me from remarking in any way about Her Highness’ appearance that is unrelated to her safety or decorum.
Rola: [whispering loudly] That means he thinks you’re hot.
Zelda: HOLY MOTHER!
Link: [very embarrassed, pretending he’s not]
Rola: Speaking of which, Michael asked if you could be there when his bandages come off tomorrow. He said he wanted you to be the first thing that he sees.
Zelda: [blushes] The flatterer. I would be honored, but…is he recovered well enough, then? To see?
Rola: We will be able to tell when he bowls over in awe from your beauty!
Zelda: Ugh! You’re incorrigible!
Rola: [cackles unrepentantly]
Link: [follows with a small smile]
-
Link: [talking to Epona]
Sir Seo: Sir.
Link: !
Sir Seo: No need to pretend, sir, I know you knew I was here.
Link: …I didn’t expect you to speak.
Sir Seo: I wanted to talk with you, sir. May I join you?
Link: Of course. The princess?
Sir Seo: At the Spring with Sir Mauv, Sir Ingrid, and Sir Thatch. Half the rest are patrolling the temple, the rest are grabbing lunch.
Link: Good. Thank you, Sir Seo.
Sir Seo: [takes his time dragging over a stool and sitting]
Sir Seo: All that talk Sir Omari was going on about how we’re all afraid of you? That’s not the full story, sir.
Link: [smiling] I would hope not. I’d make a poor leader if you only followed me out of fear.
Sir Seo: Fear’s a small part of it. You’re disciplined, staunch, do what you say and say what you mean, and a man of few words. There are soldiers aplenty who like that sort of thing, even if they aren’t as vocal as the ones who dislike it.
Link: [bows his head in acknowledgement]
Sir Seo: You told the truth when you said a lot of us hated you. Resented you. A lot of us thought that you were getting favors because you were the Hero, not that you were that good was why you were Hero in the first place.
Link:
Sir Seo: Plenty of us thought it was madness you being placed as Captain of the Princess Guard. There were other soldiers who were respected, came from old, loyal families.
Link: Like you, Sir Seo?
Sir Seo: Am I wrong to think that?
Link: No, sir. You’d have made an excellent captain.
Sir Seo: …hm. You mean that, don’t you?
Link: ? Of course.
Sir Seo: Sir Omari talked about what won our fear. For a lot of us older knights, can you guess what it was you did that won our respect?
Link: [shakes head]
Sir Seo: Sir Iskander.
Link: !
Sir Seo: Had I been the one in your shoes sir, I’d have laid Sir Iskander flat and then knocked out a few teeth with my boot for good measure.
Link: …I was tempted.
Sir Seo: Truly? You never let on.
Link: I wanted to be the better man.
Sir Seo: And so you are. Better than a lot of us, sir. The way you handled him was a way a lot of us wouldn’t have handled ourselves. That’s when a lot of the older soldiers realized it wasn’t luck and privilege why you were Captain.
Link: …that’s kind of you to say.
Sir Seo: Nothing kind about it. Just the truth as I know it. [stands, salutes] Thank you for letting me say my piece.
Link: Of course.
Sir Seo: [leaves]
Link: That was very nice of Sir Seo to make me aware of all that.
Epona: [huffs]
Link: Yes, yes, you’re very nice too.
-
Zelda: [three loud bangs from inside her room]
Sir Ingrid, Sir Link: ?
Zelda: Ingrid. Ingrid. SIR INGRID—
Link: Your Highness—
Zelda: EVERYTHING IS FINE SIR LINK BUT PLEASE SEND FOR SIR INGRID
Sir Ingrid: [quickly pushes Link aside and enters with a rare unsmiling expression]
Link: [strains his ears but hears nothing over murmured conversation and two sharp thumps]
Sir Ingrid: [returns to post]
Link:
Sir Ingrid: All is well, sir. A stray keese wandered into Her Highness’ rooms. She knocked it into an empty wicker chest but had to sit on it to keep it from escaping.
Link: [nods]
Sir Ingrid: She was in a state of undress was why she asked for me and not you, sir.
Link:
Sir Ingrid: I’m just being thorough in my report, sir.
Link:
Sir Ingrid: …sorry, sir. I won’t volunteer unnecessary information in the future, sir.
-
Michael: Good morning, Your Royal Highness. [holds up hand]
Zelda: Good morning, Michael. I hear that your bandages will be coming off today. Thank you for giving me the honor of sitting with you through this trial. [holds his hand]
Michael: Thank you for sitting here, Your Highness. It’s, um. It’s not likely to be a pretty sight.
Zelda: At ease. I’ve seen open wounds before. Your smile is sure to outshine any ugliness you think you’ve inherited, I assure you.
Michael: [blushing] Gosh, Your Highness.
Rola: By your leave, Michael.
Michael: Yes please, Holy Mother. [squeezes Zelda’s hand]
Rola: [removes bandages]
Room: [baited breath]
Zelda: [calmly watches his healing wounds be revealed, meets his eyes]
Michael: Mm. Oh? You’re the princess?
Zelda: [relieved, squeezes his hand] I am.
Michael: [swoons] Wow!
Room: [cheers]
Zelda: [giggles]
Michael: I think I’ve died and gone to heaven!
Rola: [kisses teeth] Don’t insult my work, boy.
Michael: Yes, Holy Mother.
Zelda: [scanning his face] I was right about your smile. Your wounds look painful. Does it hurt to smile?
Michael: [blushing] Only a little bit, Your Highness, I—Master Link?!
Link: !!
Michael: [stares]
Link: ?!?!
Michael: I beg your pardon, Master Link—Sir Link for failing to pay you the proper respects! Good morning!
Room: That’s Sir Link? He doesn’t put on airs. A little intimidating actually. Thought he’d be taller…
Link: [awkwardly but clearly] At ease, I don’t deserve any dues. I’m a soldier, just like you.
Michael: Don’t I know it sir! Humble as a barn mouse, just as he said!
Link: ?
Michael: Why, back when Sir Iskander was based here, he talked your praises non-stop! Said you were the change in the world that made good men out of sorry sods like him!
Link: !
Zelda: I’m curious about this Sir Iskander. Why would he refer to himself as a sorry sod?
Michael: Oh, well you see, Your Highness, back when Sir Iskander was stationed at Hyrule Castle—
Link: Sir Iskander is a humble man.
Michael: [chilled after meeting Link’s eye] Y-yes. Yes, sir. He was humble, sir.
Zelda: [turns and glares at Link]
Link: [meets her evenly, bows slightly] We’re on borrowed time, Your Highness.
Zelda:
Link:
Zelda:
Zelda: Yes, very well. Far be it for me to get between a military man and his beloved deadlines. Good morning, Michael, good morning all of you. It was wonderful to make your acquaintance. Holy Mother, please see us out?
-
Zelda: I’d say that was a wonderful excursion. Or at least I’d like to. As I’ve yet to grow into my power one might say this trip was an utter waste of time and resources. But I’d like to think that it was not for naught. It is always a pleasure to speak with Holy Mother Rola. She has a way of blending spiritualism and practicality in a way that doesn’t feel as plastic as the rituals practiced at home do. Her belief is informed. Open.
Zelda: Sir Omari.
Sir Omari: [jumps] Your Highness.
Zelda: Who is Sir Iskander?
Zelda: Sir Omari do NOT look at Sir Link!
Sir Omari: [sweating, feels Link’s eyes on him]
Zelda: My goodness! Must the retelling of every story related to you be an exercise in pulling teeth?!
Link: [watches her noncommittedly]
Sir Seo: Your Highness: if I may be so bold?
Zelda: Go ahead.
Sir Seo: That story is best told by either Sir Link or Sir Iskander himself, Your Highness.
Zelda: Is no-one here familiar with whatever it was that passed between them?
Sir Seo: We know bits, but we weren’t there for all of it.
Zelda: Well, I never! And I suppose if I command Sir Link to enlighten us, he would refuse!
Sir Link: Of course not, Your Royal Highness. It is my duty to serve the crown.
Zelda: Oh hush.
Sir Link:
Royal Guard: [squashing down amused grins and chuckles]
Zelda: Ripping the story from behind your teeth won’t be half as satisfying as a story freely given.
Link: [quietly relieved]
Zelda: I shall just have to find this ubiquitous Sir Iskander instead.
Link: [quietly unnerved]
-
Captain: I heard you took out the two hinoxes that had barricaded the Bridge of Hylia.
Link: …
Captain: Imagine how it looks for the king to send out a squad of some of his best to clear them out only to find dried blood and the Princess Guard where their monsters should be.
Link: …
Captain: In case you’re wondering where the new crop of shallow pissants calling you a glory hoarder come from, it’s because of that.
Link: I don’t care about glory.
Captain: I know you don’t, kid—sir. I know you don’t, sir. But there are people in the world who can’t fathom doing the right thing just because. Makes them nervous. They live with an ultimate agenda, so they assume everyone lives that way too.
Link: I’m not going to stop doing the right thing to soothe the egos of the ignorant and vain.
Captain: [impressed] Well said, Sir Link. You sounded a bit like the princess there.
Link: [embarrassed] …she talks aloud a lot.
Captain: You’re getting along yet or is she still up to something?
Link: I don’t know.
Captain: That sounds even scarier.
Link: [drinks in agreement]
-
Zelda: Sir Link, I need yo—oh? Where is Sir Link?
Sir Mauv: Sir Link answered a summons from His Majesty, Your Highness.
Zelda: How unusual. No: he’s probably praising him for dispatching the monsters at the Bridge of Hylia. But if that were the case, shouldn’t my entire retinue be summoned and praised?
Sir Mauv: If all of us left our posts, Your Highness, we wouldn’t catch wind that you escaped until four days later.
Zelda: I do not remember giving you the leave to speak, sir!
Sir Mauv: [stiffens]
Zelda: I’m joking. All the same, you’re thrice as catty as Sir Link!
Sir Mauv: [smiles, but has learned his lesson and does not speak]
Zelda: Nothing for it, I suppose. Sir Omari, I have need of you. Please accompany me to my study.
Sir Omari: Of course, Your Highness. How may I assist you?
Zelda: I need a test subject to measure the effectiveness, duration, and side effects of a solution I’ve brewed.
Sir Omari: [slows] A…solution, Your Highness?
Zelda: Yes. An elixir.
Sir Omari: Pardon me, Your Highness, an elixir made of what?
Zelda: [as though it were obvious] Why Sir Omari, what did you think I was going to do with all of those Tireless Frogs?
Sir Omari: I believe Sir Mauv would be better equipped to handle this mission, Your Highness.
Sir Mauv: [distantly] Age before beauty, Sir Omari.
Zelda: Honestly, cowards the lot of you. Just close your eyes and pretend its chicken!
-
Sir Omari:
Sir Mauv:
Sir Omari:
Sir Mauv: …did it taste like chicken?
Sir Omari: [glares]
Sir Mauv: Just askin’.
Sir Omari:
Sir Mauv:
Sir Mauv: You realize what this means, right?
Sir Omari: ?
Sir Mauv: Sir Link’s probably eaten frogs for Her Highness’ experiments before.
Sir Omari: !!!
-
Zelda: Sir Link—hm? He’s not back yet?
Sir Seo: No, Your Highness.
Zelda: Has Lady Impa been seen on the grounds either?
Sir Seo: No, Your Highness.
Zelda: I see. She’s perhaps running errands on the behest of the Sheikah matriarch. No matter. Sir Seo, if you would please enter my study—
Sir Seo: I believe Sir Ingrid would be more than overjoyed to assist you with your project, with what she heard of Sir Omari’s experience.
Zelda: Is that so?! [excited]
Sir Ingrid: [incapable of saying no to her grin] …yes, Your Highness.
Sir Seo: [catches her eye as she passes, mouths] Go with the Goddess.
Sir Ingrid: [mouths] Calamity take you.
-
Zelda: [opens her doors]
Princess Guard: [flinch]
Zelda: Ah! Sir Link! You’re back! Come, I need you.
Princess Guard: [sigh in relief]
-
Soldier: What the heck is going on with the Princess Guard at training lately??
Other soldier: [winded] Right?! They’re so energetic!
-
Captain: Sir Link.
Link: Sir.
Captain: Be careful around the Princess.
Link: ?
Captain: Remember when you said you thought she might be up to something? Well, I heard she’s cooking a plot to have you reassigned to Hebra.
Link: …
Link: Isn’t spying on the princess treason?
Captain: Kid, you may be the king’s favourite but I can still bend you over one knee and spank you for insubordination, see if I don’t.
Link: You didn’t answer me.
Captain: [walks away]
-
Zelda: Will Sir Omari be accompanying us to our trip to Akkala? I didn’t frighten him off, did I?
Link: No, Your Highness.
Zelda: Sir Ingrid, then? I’ve grown fond of her.
Link: No, Your Highness.
Zelda: I suppose it would be faster to ask you who will be accompanying us.
Link: I will be your escort to the Spring of Power, Your Highness.
Zelda: …you alone?
Link: Yes, Your Highness.
Zelda: …Sir Link, your eyes and ears are keen, you’ve never missed a shot, and your talent for tactics is unparalleled, but you are—and I say this with great respect—you are only one man.
Link: You flatter me, Your Highness.
Zelda: I admit to a truth I had once turned a willful blindness to.
Link:
Zelda: Is my father aware of this unusual arrangement?
Link: …
Zelda: What are you not telling me, Sir?
Link: His Majesty believes that [pauses]
Zelda: [narrows eyes] My imagination will be worse than whatever you will say.
Link: His Majesty believes that I am more than capable of defending Your Highness. We will travel faster and less conspicuously as a pair than as a group.
Zelda: Are those his words verbatim?
Link: I do not recall his words verbatim, Your Highness.
Zelda: You’re lying.
Link:
Zelda: Are you telling me that my father is sending you and I out on a days’ long adventure unchaperoned?
Link:
Zelda: Tell me, does he hand you glazed ham on silver platters as readily as he does princesses?
Link:
Zelda: I must speak with him posthaste. He didn’t even deign tell me this himself. It proves that he knew how I would react!
Link:
Zelda: You understand my ire, do you not?
Link: Yes, Your Highness.
Zelda: Are you comfortable with this arrangement?
Link: No, Your Highness.
Zelda: I thank you for your candor! Pray tell why not?!
Link: Because you dislike me, Your Highness.
Zelda: ?
Zelda: Why in the world would you think so? I compliment you each day.
Link: Yes, in the hope I would dislike it.
Zelda: !
Link: I beg your pardon, Your Highness. I spoke out of turn. I will ready the horses.
Zelda: …
-
Zelda: What do you mean my father is busy?
Captain of the Imperial Guard: His Majesty the King is currently hosting a foreign dignitary and had asked to not be disturbed.
Zelda: Not even for his daughter?
Captain: I beg your pardon, Your Highness.
Zelda:
Zelda: [marches off]
-
Zelda: I am sure you’re irritated that we’ll be starting off so late in the day. I apologize. A series of surprises were sprung upon me this morning. As you are aware. You had delivered half of them.
Link:
Zelda: Yes? I see you staring. Is the outfit ill-fitted? I thought it made me look rather smart.
Link: …
Zelda: You may speak freely.
Link: …Your Highness looks wealthy.
Zelda: But I do not look like the Crown Princess of Hyrule, now do I!
Link:
Zelda: As I understand it, you and I are to travel the roads incognito. But I am incapable of hiding my mannerisms, habits, and patterns of speech. Therefore, I made it my aim to not look like the Princess of Hyrule! The Yiga won’t target a traveling baron’s daughter, yes?
Link: Thieves might.
Zelda: Of whom you are overqualified in the act of dispatching!
Link: [sighs because its true]
Zelda: [pops crop]
Link: !
Zelda: I’m sure you’re aware, but shortly before you were conscripted into my service, I had spent a year travelling the four corners of Hyrule to oversee the resurrection of the Divine Beasts. My last leg was spent beneath the guidance of Chief Urbosa, who encouraged me to learn about Gerudo culture in between my duties to the Goddess.
Zelda: [runs the crop down her leather gloves]
Link: [eyes trained on the motion, wary she might hit him]
Zelda: One of my favourite excursions was attending their Advanced Voe Class. The women there were accepting and open-minded, and cheekily referred to a special technique as training your voe. They emphasized that it was important to impart that you were capable of holding your own in the relationship by being firm and dependable—[pops crop again]—but that you were also capable of immeasurable kindness. [smiles radiantly]
Link: !
Zelda: Do you find it is the same with riding, Sir Link?
Link:
Link: Horses.
Link: Training horses. Yes.
Zelda: [disappointed he didn’t laugh] I beg your pardon. I was trying to be humorous but I realize I have made you uncomfortable. Unless there’s anything else, I suppose we should be on our way, yes?
Link: Yes, Your High—[trails off when she mounts her horse herself, he’s only ever seen her ride side-saddle. She has perfect form.]
Zelda: Sir Link? Is something amiss with my mount’s outfit?
Link: [checks over mount] No, Your Highness.
Zelda: We’re off, then?
Link: [pensive over Zelda’s wildly oscillating mood]
-
Zelda: I admit I was annoyed at first but riding with only the two of us comes with a wealth of advantages. No-one looks at me in askance or reverence or deference, it’s quieter, and we’re moving much faster now that I’m not required to look like Hylia Herself all the time.
Link:
Zelda: I say, are we making good time, Sir Link?
Link: Yes, Your Highness. We’ll be at the Woodland Stable shortly.
Zelda: Woodland Stable? But that’s still far from the Zora Domain, where my father would like me to pay respects to King Dorephan on the way to the spring.
Link: The switchback trail leading into the Zora Domain might not be traversable come nightfall.
Zelda: But there’s so much day ahead and our steeds are so young! If we push them a little, I’m sure it would be no hardship!
Link: We aren’t guaranteed to make it.
Zelda: I’ll take that bet!
Link: ?
Zelda: HYAH!
Link: !!! [pursues]
Zelda: [rushes over the bridge, past a bokoblin camp, past a moblin laying in wait for travelers, (Link puts three arrows in its eye and Zelda is none the wiser), tears past the Woodland Stable, slows only on the road leading to the intersection between Akkala and the Zora Domain]
Link: [catches her horse’s reins when he’s in range, is very irritated]
Zelda: Oh, that was marvelously brisk! This is a fine mare, she’s so reactive! [pets mane] Not half as spirited as my unbroken cantankerous white stallion.
Link: [silent in annoyance]
Zelda: What’s that expression about then? Aren’t I right? Aren’t we making good time?
Link: That was dangerous, Your Highness.
Zelda: What dangers were there?
Link: ?!
Link: You rushed by three monster dens—
Zelda: Did I?
Link: —on an open road of other pedestrians—
Zelda: They evaded, didn’t they?
Link: —ahead of me, such that I could not watch your surroundings properly.
Zelda: Nothing for it, why are you upset?
Link: ??!?
Link: Your Royal Highness.
Zelda: !
Link: Your security is my life. Please do not do that again.
Zelda:
Zelda: Shall we water the horses? I’m feeling rather parched myself.
Link: [abides, wary of her]
Zelda: [brushes down her horse, Link is surprised to see she’s doing it correctly] I find myself begging your pardon twice in one day, Sir Link.
Link:
Zelda: It is irregular for me. I meant no harm in rushing ahead. I was intoxicated in the moment at the lack of restriction of my skirts, my jewelry, and temporarily of my station.
Link: …
Zelda: I have been told before I am self-absorbed. I do not know if this is inherent or learned, as I see value in introspection, but the fact remains that empathy is one of my poor points. Sir Link.
Link:
Zelda: I apologize that I placed us both in a position that compromised my safety. I promise from henceforth that in matters of my security, I will always defer to you.
Link: …thank you, Your Highness.
Zelda: Don’t go mad with power, now.
Link: [swallows a smile]
Zelda: How many hours are left of daylight? Five, perhaps six?
Link: [nods]
Zelda: I think we can make it up to the Zora Domain at a lazy trot, don’t you?
Link: [nods]
Zelda: Although, King Dorephan will be expecting us tomorrow, not today. To show up while they’re still preparing will be terribly rude.
Link: …
Zelda: Perhaps we can camp here for the night.
Link:
Zelda: Goddess, if looks could kill.
-
King Dorephan: Good evening, Your Royal Highness Princess Zelda. Welcome to the Zora Domain.
Zelda: Good evening, King Dorephan. Thank you for the gracious welcome, this despite mistiming our arrival drastically.
King Dorephan: It is no trouble. Your rooms are prepared and space is set for you at the dinner table. It will be a pleasure to have you, and to have our old friend regale us with stories of his misadventures! Your legends precede you, Sir Link.
Sir Link: [bows in acknowledgement]
King Dorephan: Princess Mipha will show you to your rooms. Daughter?
Mipha: Yes, father.
Zelda: I thank you, King Dorephan.
King Dorephan: Enjoy the Domain.
Zelda:
Mipha:
Zelda: [knees wobble] pheewwww
Link: !
Mipha: [threads their arms together] You did wonderfully, Princess Zelda.
Zelda: Oh, thank you. Mm. May we pause a moment? Pretend to watch the ducks perhaps?
Mipha: Of course. I see you are surprised, Link. You see: Her Royal Highness is exceptionally good at public speaking, social events, and the wherewithal that involves political decorum, but she also suffers from social anxiety.
Zelda: [in brisk protest] Moderate to significant stage fright, thank you.
Link: ! [Link never picked up on that at all, he thought she was a hermit]
Zelda: Please do not tease me in front of my Appointed Knight, our friendship is as tenuous as it is.
Link: !!! [he’s surprised to hear Zelda refer to him as a friend]
Mipha: A little vulnerability can go a long way. Do you require smelling salts?
Zelda: No, no, a deep breath is all. The Zora air is rich with life and industry. I can see construction underway to expand the Domain. Do you have plans to go through the mountain?
Mipha: We do. The architects plan to have wide observation decks looking out to Akkala. There were concerns that creating a hollow through the cliffs would undermine our protection and change the way the wind flows through the Domain. The changes would not be half as detrimental as the alternative plans to expand complexes underwater at the foot of the cliffs, where the temperature difference would foster the growth of red freshwater kelp.
Zelda: The temperature difference is so great?
Mipha: It is significant enough.
Zelda: The Zora Domain requires a certain number of river snails to keep the red kelp down, which produces a secretion toxic to youths and eggs, correct?
Mipha: And the pregnant, yes. But projections show that we will not be able to boost sneaky river snail populations in time, should we follow though.
Zelda: And then there’s the nursery, which must remain in moving water.
Mipha: That is correct.
Zelda: Were there any designs that involved isolating the nursery while expanding underwater complexes?
Mipha: [wrapping her arm around Zelda’s] There are, though they were rejected. Containment is the last thing antsy expectant parents desire. I can have them brought to your room later, if you like.
Zelda: [squeezes her hand] I would adore that, thank you.
Mipha: I missed you.
Zelda: I missed you too. Unfortunately, I don’t have the liberty to leave the Castle as much as I would like.
Mipha: Oh? I’d have thought Link being your one-man guard would have afforded you greater mobility.
Zelda: I…hm? Do you know Sir Link, Mipha?
Mipha: Why yes, Link spent his formative years in the Domain.
Zelda: Sir Link was born in the Zora Domain?
Mipha: I do not think so, was he not born in Gatepost Town?
Zelda and Mipha: [stare at Link in askance]
Link:
Zelda: You’re so weird.
Link: !
Mipha: [giggles] I was the one who taught him to dive and swim, and I gained great practice healing his greenstick fractures.
Zelda: Oh? Were you a rambunctious child, Sir Link?
Mipha: Most certainly reckless.
Link: [embarrassed by their giggling]
Mipha: Here you are, Your Highness. And Sir Link has the room directly beside yours.
Zelda: Oh Goddess, don’t I see enough of you, now we’re neighbors?
Link:
Zelda: That was a joke.
Link: [looks away]
Zelda: He’s so utterly unimpressed with my brand in humour. He drives me to improve.
Mipha: [giggling] He tends to bring out the best in those around him, yes.
Zelda: Oh dear, don’t let Revali hear you say that.
Mipha: You’re saying that Revali’s peacocking doesn’t ultimately hone his skill?
Zelda: My, you’re right! What an effect you have on people, Sir Link!
Link: [embarrassed by their giggling]
Mipha: Dinner is not for another hour, but I can have a snack sent to your room, Your Highness.
Link: [looks at Zelda hopefully]
Zelda: [catches it] I am more than fine, old friend, but my Appointed Knight as a hollow leg.
Mipha: Don’t I know it!
Link: [embarrassed by their giggling]
Zelda: Consider yourself relieved from duty, Sir Link. I promise to send word and carry a guard should I have any desire, however unreasonable it may be, to leave my voluptuous bed.
Link: [bows to princess, follows Mipha]
Link: [doubles back]
Everyone: ?
Link, to guard: Do not be alarmed if Her Royal Highness creates weapons of mass destruction on her vanity. Call for me if anything explodes.
Guard: I?? Yes, sir.
Zelda: I have some indecorous words in mind for you, Sir Link.
Link: [bows to princess, follows Mipha]
-
Mipha and Link: [alone on one of the high bridges overlooking the Domain, their conversation is exclusively in sign]
Link: Thank you.
Mipha: It’s no trouble at all. Will you still be able to eat again for dinner in half an hour?
Link:
Mipha: Of course, old friend. How could I doubt. [giggles]
Link: [smiles]
Mipha: I missed you.
Link: [nudges her shoulder with his own]
Mipha: And I am always happy to see you, but I am curious. You’re usually such a stickler for time. How did you undershoot your arrival at the Domain by an entire day?
Link: [annoyed] Princess.
Mipha: What had she done?
Link: Takes off. Guns horse. Insensible.
Mipha: [giggles] I would take that as a compliment. It means she trusted you to be free and safe despite the dangers.
Link: She didn’t KNOW there were dangers!
Mipha: Oh, I missed you! No-one in the Domain is half as expressive as you!
Link: Call me blank.
Mipha: Who does, your peers?
Link: [nods]
Mipha: Is that because you keep lopping off words in Common Hylian as you do in Zora Sign?
Link: Poor practice.
Mipha: I know, friend, and I tease. For someone who hasn’t had a constant companion in the language for over seven years, you’ve retained the language quite well.
Link:
Mipha: Why do they call you blank, Link?
Link: I look like S-E-G-G-I-N. [pulls face of a miserable old man]
Mipha: [laughs] Goodness, you do!
Link: [smiles at lap]
Mipha: [touches his hand]
Link: ?
Mipha: There is something else I wished to share with you.
Link:
Mipha: By your expression I sense that you are already aware.
Link: [looks away]
Mipha: [gently pulls his face back to her with claws beneath his chin] Oh my dear, don’t be so upset. I should be the one crying, shouldn’t I?
Link: [rubs his red eyes] Not crying.
Mipha: No, of course not. [strokes his hair like he’s Sidon]
Link: Your heart. Breaks. Don’t want that.
Mipha: Is that why you stayed away? Rejected our welcome to have you based in the Zora Domain?
Link: …I sent letters.
Mipha: And each and every one was saturated with an immense loneliness. That is what broke my heart, Link.
Link: …
Mipha: I won’t berate you for the choices you made in the past. I’ll just make you aware that your reasoning was foolish.
Link: [smiles at her]
Mipha: [pinches his chin] You promised me you would try to make friends. Have you?
Link: L-U-K-A treats me on weekends.
Mipha: Your uncle does not count, Link!
Link: Sir S-E-O is nice. So’s Sir I-N-G-R-I-D, my deputy.
Mipha: I am glad. You are a golden soul, Link. You deserve to have good friends around you.
Link: Like you?
Mipha: Of course, like me. Always. You’ll always have me.
Link: I love you. [holds her hand]
Mipha: I know that. [smiles sadly] What about the princess?
Link: [immediately wary as he always is around the princess] What ABOUT the princess?
Mipha: Why are you so guarded?
Link: Tricky. Devious. Smart. Scary.
Mipha: Princess Zelda?
Link: She’s nice to you.
Mipha: [giggles] I don’t believe what I’m hearing! Link: the princess adores you. She was trying to make you laugh all day.
Link: ???
Mipha: Had you not noticed?
Link: She hates me.
Mipha: What in the world makes you think that?!
Link: I overheard. She’s nice to ship me off to Hebra.
Mipha: [frowns] Now that doesn’t sound like the princess at all.
Link: I told you. She’s nice to you.
Mipha: No, that’s not it. We’re missing context. I know that the Princess Zelda is poor with words sometimes, Link. What you heard is not what she meant.
Link: I promise. She hates me. She ran away today.
Mipha: I’m sure she was just playing.
Link: She’s nice to YOU! She’s scary!
Mipha: You’re being silly.
Link: !!
Mipha: Come. Let’s go to dinner. I shall prove it to you.
Link: [palpable distrust]
Mipha: Don’t look at me like that. Have I ever let you down?
Link: The time you made me jump from—
Mipha: [embarrassed, grabs his hands to silence him] Do not answer that.
Link:
Mipha: Trust me? I know exactly what to say.
Link: …
-
Mipha: Princess Zelda, do you hate your Appointed Knight?
Zelda: [chokes on a vegetable]
Link: [closes his eyes in prayer]
Zelda: That is…ehem, an unusual dinner conversation, Princess Mipha. What brought this on?
Mipha: I had been curious. Link mentioned you in his letters.
Zelda: [glances at Link] Oh?
Link: [staring at the ceiling, still praying]
Zelda: Are you enabling me to embarrass my Appointed Knight, Princess Mipha?
Mipha: As his childhood friend it would be remiss of me to let the opportunity pass.
Link: [still praying, embarrassed by their giggling]
Courtiers at the table: [lightened by teenage girls giggling at a teenage boy’s expense]
Zelda: Then I shall tell you every dreadful detail. In the beginning I could not stand him.
Link: [stares at his plate]
Zelda: Certain doom loomed on the horizon, and then comes Hylia’s beloved Chosen Hero decked out in the livery of the Master Sword, his talents, and his reputation. He burst out of the earth fully formed. His face was marble. His boots were scuffed. My ire was justified, you understand.
Mipha: [dramatically] Of course!
Link: [slowly realizes they aren’t being mean]
Zelda: Over time I came to learn that there is a person behind the placid mask he presents to the public. One who has very little care for the world but horses, cooking food, horses, eating food—
Mipha: You forgot to mention horses.
Zelda: So I did, Princess Mipha, thank you. Horses too—
Courtiers: [rumble with good natured laughter]
Link: [pretending not to be embarrassed, is faintly embarrassed]
Zelda: —and I must not forget his uncanny talent to balance nigh anything on his head.
Link: [blushes in embarrassment]
Mipha: Oh my! Look at his reaction! What is the story there?
Zelda: [looks at him and grins] So I have a habit of hazing my Princess Guard…
-
Mipha: I told you she didn’t hate you.
Link:
Mipha: [rustles his hair like he’s Sidon]
-
Zelda: Given that we are a day ahead of schedule, can we take out one (or twelve) hours for me to look at the Divine Beast?
Link:
Zelda: Don’t look at me like that. You should be grateful that I am asking instead of running off to Vah Ruta without as much as a “by your leave”.
Link: …
Zelda: I promise this was not my intention. However, now that the opportunity has been presented to us, it would be a great shame if I didn’t take the time to puzzle out why the Divine Beasts’ reactions lag. It would be a travesty! A disaster! A—dare I say it—a calamity!
Link: …
Zelda: I thought that was rather funny.
Link: [shifts in resignation]
Zelda: Aha! I sense a chip in your armor, Hero! Twelve hours then, and we’re off to Akkala first thing in the morning?
Link:
Zelda: Eleven? Ten? I suppose that makes sense, if I want to eat and sleep.
Link:
Zelda: Nine? Eight? SEVEN?
Link:
Zelda: Do you mean to leave for Akkala today?
Link: [holds up one finger]
Zelda: ONE HOUR! You offend me, sir!
Link: [sighs]
Zelda: Five!
Link:
Zelda: Four and a half!
Link:
Zelda: Three, and I will I will…I will not upend your schedule for the return trip. Hm?
Link: [nods]
Zelda: Goodness! You must give the merchants grief when you haggle!
Mipha: I have it on good authority that he does.
Zelda: Mipha! Perfect timing!
Mipha: Oh? Pray tell?
Zelda: May I have your permission to board Vah Ruta and investigate the time lag?
Mipha: Of course, Your Highness, but I was under the impression that my situation was not as dire as Vah Naboris’.
Zelda: Indeed, but my father’s racist counsel is invested in barring my passage.
Mipha: [frowns] Good heavens.
Zelda: Father doesn’t seem to see that they are using the foot-in-the-door technique to starting a harmful precedent. First the Gerudo, then who? The Rito? The Zora? The Gorons? Factions among the Hylians? They’re eager to thrive in atrophy. But worry not, Princess Mipha. I’ve a plan and a flamethrower in mind for them. [winks]
Mipha: Wh…what is a flamethrower?
Link: Don’t ask.
Zelda: Rude.
Mipha: [suddenly believes Link when he says Zelda is frightening] Right. Well then, allow me to escort you.
Zelda: Thank you. I hope that the local team keep you well informed?
Mipha: They do! I admit more often than not the technical jargon flies over my head, but they’re all very friendly and eager to answer my questions—well, some of them. Some of them prefer I not ask them questions at all.
Zelda: You must forgive them. When bitten by the bug of discovery it leaves you patient for little else.
Mipha: You speak from experience.
Zelda: I do. Sir Link can attest for the days I would spend in my study enthralled with a new discovery. I’m currently in the process of making another Sheikah slate! I’m so excited! As you know we currently only have five in rotation. Purah believes that there were many many more in the hands of generals who would oversee the progress of legions of Guardians. If there were, the obvious question is where are they? Hints to future locations lie in where we found the fifth…
Mipha: [sends an amused look back at Link]
Link: [staring at the back of Zelda’s head as he listens, glances at Mipha at the last moment]
Mipha: [suggestive surprised smile]
Link: ???
Zelda: Isn’t that exciting, Mipha?!
Mipha: [side-eyeing Link still] It is very intriguing, Your Highness.
Link: [unnerved]
-
Zelda: [simultaneously listening to a Sheikah engineer’s report while reading from the clipboard she gave her] I see, I see, I see.
Link: [mind spinning as he tries to keep up]
Mipha: [unphased, either completely understands or completely does not]
Zelda: Thank you, Fuu. May I take a look at the central processing unit? Is anyone currently using that terminal?
Fuu: No, Your Highness, you may go ahead, though we’ve already looked it over.
Zelda: I understand. I won’t do a thorough diagnostic because I only have two hours, but I promise to leave it as I find it.
Fuu: Haha, you’re one of the only people I’d trust with the sensitive parts of this place! Here, your gear, Your Highness.
Zelda: Thank you. [pulls on goggles, gloves, and a belt of tools]
Link: ?
Zelda: You shall come to learn, Sir Link, that I never leave the Castle without the Sheikah Slate, a pair of good boots, and my trusty toolkit.
Link: [signs] Goddess forbid she include a first aid kit or handy knife.
Mipha: [giggles]
Zelda: Why would I need those things? That’s what you’re for.
Link: ! [forgot that Zelda speaks Zora sign]
Mipha: [hadn’t forgotten] Are there any languages you don’t speak, Your Highness?
Zelda: …hm. Sarcastic silences.
Link:
Zelda: I don’t know what that means, Link.
Mipha: [giggles]
Zelda: [smiles] Anyway, as you heard Fuu say, the sensors of Vah Ruta are operating within parameters, and her trunk—the only part of her that we can move with repeatable, predictable effect—is performing perfectly. That leaves Vah Ruta’s brain.
Zelda: I would like you to join me on a metaphor. Pretend that a bee as alighted on your arm. When it stings you, you pull away, yes? In that knee-jerk reaction multiple things must take place. First, the nerves beneath the skin register the sting. The nervous system transfers that information to the brain. The brain processes it, registers that it is pain, and tells your arm to move away, which is another instruction fired down the nervous system. Of course, all of this is automatic. You do not think about it. It happens despite your thoughts even.
Link and Mipha: [nod]
Zelda: Now when a pilot gives Vah Ruta instructions, much of this is the same. For the metaphor’s sake, Mipha is the bee sting. Or any sort of stimulus. Vah Ruta’s sensors, embedded within the walls of everything that we can see around us, are the nerve endings which will pick up information from Mipha. And this is the brain.
Zelda: Not unlike a person’s brain, Vah Ruta’s brain is segmented. There are parts related to her mobility, to processing changes in her environment, and to processing input from her pilot. I believe, seeing as nothing else is out of order, that it is that part of her brain—that deals with information between the pilot and Vah Ruta—that we need to pay attention to.
Zelda: [the entire time that she was speaking she was removing the outer casing from Vah Ruta’s central processor. Now, she ducks out of sight beneath it, still explaining herself at length]
Mipha: [hears a crash, signs to Link] I will be right back.
Link: [nods]
Zelda: [ignorant of Mipha’s departure] What I am going to do is that I am going to look into this part of her brain and see what is going on. Every test Fuu has run so far implies that it is not a mechanical problem, but a problem with the code. With the…the nerve endings and synapses, if you will. No no—with the signals that travel along the nervous system. Yes! Mm. That is what code is.
Link: [sits on the ground, Zelda is lying on her back]
Zelda: There is a great amount of space within the Divine Beast but so little within here, it’s amazing. To power a mountain into motion takes a node the size of my father. Well, the size of my father and five other terminals. And an immense power source. Actually, this ran away from me.
Link: [brows bounce in agreement]
Zelda: Ahhh I need help. Help. Mipha. Quick. It’s slipping.
Link: ! [crawls in beside her to help, grabs tipping paraphernalia just in time]
Zelda: !
Link: …what should I do?
Zelda: Uh, just hold it…I need to remove it from the harness. I should have done this first instead of the—hm. Right. I’ll stop talking.
Link: [breathes evenly, ignores when his arms start to shake]
Zelda: [working quickly]
Mipha: Is everything alright?
Zelda: Mipha! Perfect timing, please hold what Sir Link is about to pass you! Slowly, slowly, yes, you can rest it on the ground but be careful, it’s still connected to the central processing unit—beware the cords!
Mipha: It’s safely on the ground.
Link: [wiggles out]
Zelda: Wonderful. Sir Link, if you could pull me out by my ankles, please—oh! Brusque but effective, thank you. Now let’s see here… [plugs in Sheikah slate into now exposed “brain lobe”]
Zelda: Fantastic! Or, well, this isn’t fantastic, per say, but it’s progress! Look!
Mipha and Link: [look over each shoulder at the screen of the Sheikah slate]
Mipha: We do not understand Ancient Sheikah, princess.
Link: [narrows eyes]
Zelda: No, but do you see a pattern?
Link: Every other symbol is the same.
Mipha: Is it? So it is! Keen eye, Link.
Zelda: Yes! It’s complete nonsense!
Mipha: This is…good news?
Zelda: Not at all! This is a string of nonsense! But I’m happy, because this is surely the reason why Vah Ruta’s responses are lagging! Why is there a long string of undecipherable code here in response to each time you prompt Vah Ruta to do an action?
Mipha: Could it be a response?
Zelda: A response…
Mipha: I’ve often felt a…life, to Vah Ruta. I would not go as far to call it a consciousness, but perhaps a potential for intelligence. A sense of awareness. As one might feel upon watching a creature pass the mirror test.
Link: [signing] Mirror test?
Mipha: When an animal stands in front of a mirror and behaves in a way that demonstrates they are aware of the reflection being themselves instead of another animal, they are said to pass the mirror test. It is proof of their self-awareness.
Zelda: You think if we put Vah Ruta in front of a mirror she’ll pass?
Mipha: [getting the sense that she is being laughed at] Well, why not?
Zelda: HA! That reminds me, the creatures that Vah Ruta is based off, they were said to be self-aware too. What were they called again…
Mipha: Elephants.
Zelda: Yes, indeed, elephants. They were said to be creatures of extraordinary memory and creativity. There were many creatures that were lost to time. Many that we probably don’t know we’ve lost. The very idea of it makes me weep.
Zelda: I don’t think it could be a response, Mipha.
Mipha: Why not?
Zelda: Because Vah Ruta is a machine. She has no capacity for life, she was made according to the will and image of people, like you and I.
Mipha: The Goddess Hylia made us according to her will.
Zelda: She did. But the Ancient Sheikah weren’t gods.
Mipha: Their science is so beyond our understanding is there really that great of a difference?
Zelda: You conflate mysticism with science. Science is knowable. It is learnable.
Mipha: So is magic. So is faith.
Zelda: Magic defies the understandable, dependable laws of nature. Faith can only be believed. It is unquantifiable.
Mipha: And there are things about this technology that we can only believe will work, that we can only trust to work.
Zelda: Ignorance is not the same thing as belief! When we test Vah Ruta we do not have faith that the results will be to our liking, we learn from the results the test provides!
Mipha: I simply mean to say that there are things about both faith and science that are alike.
Zelda: No, Mipha, they are unalike by definition.
Link: [interrupts them with a hand in the air]
Mipha and Zelda: [giggle]
Link: [embarrassed, trying not to show it]
Zelda: Yes, Sir Link? You have the floor.
Link: I apologize, Your Highness, but we need to move on.
Zelda: Goddess, it’s been three hours already? Time flies when you’re having fun. Sir Link, please help me putting this back together.
Link: Yes, Your Highness.
Zelda: And Mipha?
Mipha: Princess?
Zelda: This conversation isn’t done.
Mipha: [a grin that is all teeth] I would be hurt if it was.
Link: [notices Zelda is blushing]
-
Holy Mother Alma: [frowns] Welcome to the Temple of Power, Your Royal Highness. I trust your journey was uneventful?
Zelda: Thank you for the welcome, Holy Mother Alma. It was, thank you.
Alma: We have a room prepared for you. When can we expect the rest of your retinue?
Zelda: It is just Sir Link and I for this journey, Holy Mother. I beg pardon, had you not been duly informed? [looks at Link]
Link: [nods in affirmation]
Alma: So we had.
Zelda: ?
Alma: [briskly] Good day, Sir Link. Sister Enid will show you to your rooms. Your Highness, I would be honored to escort you to yours.
Zelda: I thank you, Holy Mother. Sir Link, you may consider yourself off duty for the rest of the day.
Link: [signs before he can catch himself]
Zelda: [indifferent to his method of communication] Is that so? Then I shall summon you when I am ready to begin my session.
Link:
Link: [bows and follows Sister Enid]
Alma: [watches the exchange with shrewd eyes]
Zelda: I had heard tales of frightful beasts inhabiting Deep Akkala, Holy Mother. I can see soldiers have been borrowed from the Citadel accordingly.
Alma: They were indeed. May I speak with you privately for a moment, please, Your Highness?
Zelda: [alarmed] Of course, Holy Mother. [in the privacy of her borrowed rooms] You may speak freely. Is everything alright?
Alma: [impeccable posture, stiff, hands clasped over her belly] Your Royal Highness, I speak from a place of utmost respect.
Zelda: …?
Alma: Your Highness is a representative of the royal family, the temples, and by extension of the Goddess Hylia Herself. As such, it is unbecoming for Your Highness to be in the lone company of an unwed young man without a chaperone.
Zelda:
Zelda: You’d have insulted me less if you asked me point blank if I was sleeping with Sir Link.
Alma: !
Alma: Your Highness, I beg your pardon but there is no need to be crass—
Zelda: And you were less crass simply because you prefixed your rude declaration with murmurings about respect?
Alma: I speak from a place of concern for your reputation!
Zelda: That is not your place from which to speak.
Alma: [loses respect for Zelda, or more accurately, had little for her to begin with] You defend yourself fiercely, Your Highness.
Zelda: When one comes running at me bearing a knife must I simply spread my arms?
Alma:
Zelda: You wonder if I am defending any impropriety. Feel free to wonder. Feel free to add to the spinning wheel of the rumourmill. I am accustomed to it. [opens the door] Thank you for your hospitality, Holy Mother Alma. Sir Link and I will be out of your hair soon.
Alma: [leaves with a curt bow]
-
Link:
Alma: ?
Link:
Alma: (Why does he stare at me each time I walk past?)
Link: [makes beckoning gesture]
Alma: !
Alma: Sir Link.
Link: Holy Mother. Please rouse Her Highness from the spring.
Alma: [offended] …do you usually interrupt Her Royal Highness’ prayers?
Link: [confused] …Holy Mother, she’s been in the cold water for hours. She’s going to catch her death.
Alma: [mildly ashamed, goes] Your Highness. Oh! Your Highness, Your Highness! Wake up!
Link: [foregoes propriety and jumps into the spring]
Zelda: What? What is it? Oh no, did I fall asleep?
Alma: You’re blue, Your Highness. We must warm you up immediately. Sir Link, please fetch Sister Enid!
Link: [goes]
Zelda: I’m alright, I just dozed off for a moment. There’s no need to make a fuss.
Alma: Your Highness, you’re shaking.
Zelda:
Alma: Please let me help you out of the spring.
Zelda: [reluctantly accepts her hand]
-
Holy Mother Alma: [come the morning] Her Royal Highness has taken ill.
Link: !
Alma: It is nothing several days of rest and food will not mend.
Link: I see. Thank you, Holy Mother.
Alma: Of course. It is my duty to serve the crown.
Link: Do you have any messenger birds on the premises?
Alma: We do. You’d like to write a letter to the King?
Link: Yes, ma’am. And I would appreciate if you could write one as well.
Alma: Consider it written.
-
Zelda: [wakes]
Sister Enid: Your Royal Highness! [bows] Good afternoon, how are you feeling?
Zelda: I’ve a headache, sore throat, noodles for muscles, and an irresistible urge to burrow beneath these blankets like an inelegant gopher.
Enid: [giggles]
Zelda: [smiles tiredly] Good day, Sister Enid. How long have I been sleeping?
Enid: For the whole morning, and that was after Holy Mother Alma gave you medicine to drink. Sir Link said that before that he could hear you tossing and turning all night.
Zelda: And where is Sir Link now?
Enid: I believe Holy Mother chased him off to sleep.
Zelda: Good. Oh, it’s such a shame. This would have been a perfect time to steal away. Maybe I should make the attempt anyway. No-one would be expecting it.
Enid: [alarmed] Steal away, Your Highness? Whatever for?
Zelda: Doctor Robbie has an ongoing survey in the north. He believes he can excavate an ancient furnace that old maps allude to be in the area. I’d have loved to see the dig site for myself.
Enid: Begging your pardon, Your Highness, what is a survey?
Zelda: [lights up]
-
Holy Mother Alma: [stops by, hears Zelda rhapsodizing Enid with the wonders of archaeology, smiles when she hears Enid giggle]
-
Link: [taking up night duty again, sitting at the steps overlooking the spring]
Link: [hears two pairs of footsteps behind him but turns around to see Enid alone]
Enid: Good night, Master Lin—Sir Link.
Link: [bows head]
Enid: May I join you?
Link: [nods]
Enid: Have you been to the other springs?
Link: [nods]
Enid: Even the Spring of Wisdom?
Link: [nods]
Enid: What is it like there?
Link:
Link: …cold.
Enid: Colder than here?
Link: [nods]
Enid: I can’t imagine. My family’s from Lurelin. Joke is that the warm sea breeze made our blood thin. Now even just worshipping Hylia here feels like an exercise in perseverance.
Link:
Enid: The princess prays to talk to the goddess, but do you talk to the goddess too?
Link: …sometimes.
Enid: That sounds like you haven’t prayed in a while! [laughs]
Link: [smiles, Enid reminds him of his little sister]
Enid: Would you like to join me in prayer? No time like the present.
Link: [shrugs, climbs to his feet]
Link: !
Link: [turns around] What are you doing.
Enid: I? When we pray, we bear ourselves to the Goddess. It’s why the princess wears a thin robe.
Link: You’re not wearing a robe.
Enid: Well…not under my clothes, no. Will you not join me?
Link: Pray if you want to pray, Sister Enid. But no, I will not join you.
Enid: [nude, sinks into the spring in disappointment]
-
Zelda: I thank you for taking care of me, Sister Alma. We put you out much.
Alma: Nonsense. It is our duty to serve the crown, and it was an honor to receive you. I…I was indelicate in how I approached you, Your Highness. I beg your forgiveness.
Zelda: …I am willing to forget it, Holy Mother. I can understand that you meant well.
Alma: Thank you, Your Highness. May your journey be uneventful and the roads as dependable as your knight.
Zelda: …thank you for the generous blessing. (What a curious expression.)
Zelda: [approaches Link and the horses, spies Enid approach too]
Link: [eyes flicker around rapidly and avoids looking at her as she shyly offers him a netted bag of fruit]
Enid: [attempts to have a conversation but balks on the princess’ approach] Your Royal Highness.
Zelda: …Sister Enid. Thank you for your bedside manner during my convalescence.
Enid: It was my pleasure, Your Highness. [ducks away]
Zelda: [stares at Link’s back]
Link: [feels the stare, busies himself stuffing the fruit into the saddlebags]
Zelda: Sir Link. Face me.
Link: [obeys, meets her eyes evenly]
Zelda: What happened between you and Sister Enid?
Link: [turns from neutral to utterly unreadable]
Zelda: Wait here.
Link: Your Highness—
Zelda: That is an order.
Link: [obeys]
Zelda: [marches up to Alma]
Alma: ?
Zelda: How dare you.
Alma: I beg your pardon? Your Highness, this is highly irregular.
Zelda: You used that young girl to test my knight! Have you no shame?
Alma: …His conduct was commendable.
Zelda: And that is by his virtue! Not yours! What gave you the right to attempt to compromise a knight under my designation?!
Alma: The Goddess Hylia tests all of us.
Zelda: Did the Goddess Hylia whisper in your ear to tell you to throw Her underage attendant at Sir Link?!
Alma: Your Highness, you toe the line of blasphemy.
Zelda: And you do not? Acting in Hylia’s stead? Who gave you the right?
Alma: She acts through me.
Zelda: Do you even hear yourself?
Alma: I—
Zelda: Be silent!
Alma: !
Zelda: You will write a letter of apology for your conduct to Sir Link and Sister Enid. I will be sure to check that you write such letters.
Alma: !
Zelda: If you behave this way to the Crown Heir it is a wonder how you respond to layman pilgrims! I shall be launching an inquiry, Holy Mother. Good day.
Alma: [red-faced from fury]
-
Link:
Zelda: I’ve been feeling your eyes on me all day, Sir Link, what is it? Are my cuffs creased? My hair undone?
Link: Holy Mother Alma seemed upset when we left.
Zelda: Is that a question?
Link:
Link: …was it about me?
Zelda: Contrary to popular belief, Sir Link, the world does not revolve around you.
Link: Yes, Your Highness.
-
Zelda: [dismounting her horse at Akkala Citadel] Goodness, that’s quite the racket. Is there a celebration on?
Soldier: [holding Zelda’s horse’s reins] Pardon the noise, Your Highness, I’ll be sure to tell them to keep it down.
Zelda: No no, don’t let me spoil anyone’s revelry. What’s the occasion?
Soldier: We’re just welcoming back an old friend, Your Highness. There was a knight who was stationed here for a time that took the code of conduct a little far—er, no disrespect, Sir Link.
Link: ???
Zelda: [giggles] What is the knight’s name?
Soldier: Oh, he’s a knight no longer, Your Highness, but we still call him Sir Iskander.
Zelda: !
Link: !
Zelda: I would like to meet—
Link: Pardon me, Your Royal Highness, we are on a tight schedule. The commander asked for your audience as soon as you arrived.
Zelda:
Link:
Zelda:
Soldier: [anxious]
Zelda: Very well. Never get between a military man and his timelines. Lead the way, Sir Link.
-
Zelda: Good evening, I’m looking for Sir Iskan—what are you looking at—AH! Sir Link, how did you get up there?!
-
Soldier: [walking past a tapestry]
Tapestry: Do you know where I can find—
Soldier: !!!
Sir Link: [appears]
Soldier: ???
Tapestry:
Soldier: [moves on warily]
-
Soldier: Your Highness?! H-how did you get up there??
Zelda: I’ll tell you if you tell me where I can find Sir Iskander.
-
Sir Link: …[knocks on door]
Soldier: Her Highness said that she would be turning in early, Sir.
Sir Link: …Her Highness isn’t here.
Soldier: ?!
Sir Link: [opens door, sure enough, Zelda is absent]
Soldier: [blanches]
Sir Link: [narrows eyes at open window] She wasn’t kidnapped. At ease. I’ll find her.
-
Sir Iskander: [walking up a spiral staircase laughing raucously with friends in tow]
Zelda: [in disguise, everything covered but her eyes] Are you Sir Iskander? [bats lashes]
Sir Iskander’s friends: [sounds of juvenile encouragement]
Sir Iskander: Oh, er, well, depends on who’s asking.
Zelda: [produces a bottle of Goron spiced rum] May I invite you to a walk about the grounds?
Sir Iskander’s friends: [heckle]
Sir Iskander: [pressured] Of course, my lady.
Zelda: [takes the elbow he offers]
Sir Iskander: [when they’re alone in the courtyard mostly hidden in the shade of a tree] Alright I think we’re out of sight enough out here NOW THAT DOESN’T MEAN I want to get up to anything salacious with you—er, that’s not to say that I wouldn’t, it’s clear from your comportment and voice and eyes that you’re a handsome woman, but see I’m not too interested in the partaking of, er, that sort of, um. Yes. That’s not to say I’m the sort to do that with MEN—
Zelda: [revealing her face] Calm yourself. I am not here to wrestle you free of your chastity.
Sir Iskander: Your Royal Highness! [falls into a kneel]
Zelda: Do rise, Sir Iskander. You’ll undo my disguise.
Sir Iskander: Er, yes, Your Highness. Um.
Zelda: [covers face] I’m delighted to finally meet you, Sir Iskander.
Sir Iskander: I thank you, Your Highness, but I am no knight anymore. Iskander is more than enough.
Zelda: As you wish. I don’t want to deprive you of your friends’ company for very long. Please take this as a thanks in advance.
Iskander: A thanks?
Zelda: I would like you to tell me a story.
Iskander: What happened between me and Sir Link?
Zelda: …had he already threatened you?!
Iskander: Threaten is a strong word, Your Highness.
Zelda: When did he even find the time??
Iskander: He caught my eye in the mess. I figured if something stupendous happened today that I’m to be on my best behavior. After that it was just a matter of wondering why the Crown Princess of Hyrule would want to talk to me of all the people at Akkala Citadel.
Zelda: You gleaned all that from a single glance across the cafeteria??
Iskander: Work under him long enough you pick up what he doesn’t say, Your Highness.
Zelda: I’ve noticed. Will you tell me the story then? Seeing as he didn’t stop you?
Iskander: Yet, anyway.
Zelda: If he manages to find me after I gave him the slip, he deserves a raise.
Iskander: I hope you have deep pockets, Your Highness.
Zelda: Don’t joke.
Iskander: Ha. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s found us already. He’d be saving me if he has.
Zelda: In what way?
Iskander: It’s a punishable offense to be seen alone with the Crown Princess, Your Highness.
Zelda: Goodness, I’m sorry. I was unaware of that. Would you prefer me to go?
Iskander: It’s alright, Your Highness, we’re safe. Um. The story you want to hear, I should warn you, it doesn’t paint me in a good light. It doesn’t paint a good number of soldiers in a good light.
Zelda: I understand. Please proceed.
Iskander: Yes, Your Highness.
Zelda: [sits on wall and flattens her skirts]
Iskander: Well, a good place to start as any is the night I got stinking drunk with my mates. We were feeling sorry for ourselves and blaming everyone else for our lot in life. Blaming Sir Link plenty, what with his meteoric rise before he has as much as a spec of hair on his chin, and saying a few indecorous things about Your Highness too.
Zelda: Hm.
Iskander: Now had it been anyone else overheard me yowling at the moon praying for a death wish they’d’ve laid me flat in the dirt and I wouldn’t blame them. Wasn’t right what I said.
Zelda: I don’t hold it against you, Iskander, if that makes a difference. We all say things out of frustration and fear.
Iskander: That’s generous of you, Your Highness. Fact of it is though it wasn’t anyone else. It was Sir Link who heard us carrying on.
Zelda: What did he do?
Iskander: I don’t know how he did it, but he pulls strings to have me serve in the Princess Guard for a week.
Zelda: [frowns]
Iskander: [chuckles] Right? Any sane man, had he heard me and the boys carrying on, would’ve had me thrown into a cell to stew for a day or two or given me a good old-fashioned thrashing. But it turns out Sir Link was smarter than all the guard put together. I figured out what he was doing at the end of the first day.
Zelda: And what was that?
Iskander: He was showing me why I was wrong.
Zelda: [frowns]
Iskander: See, truth of it is, Prin—Your Highness, the average joe doesn’t know what you’re up to on a day-to-day basis. Some of the kinder rumours are that you spend your days locked up in your study eating fruitcake. Pardon me.
Zelda: I am not offended. It is true I enjoy fruitcake.
Iskander: Heh. And me as a castle guard, I spend most waking hours guarding empty corridors or boring dignitaries. So when I got to see what you do every day, I wised up fast.
Zelda: I’m going to look vain if I ask, Iskander.
Iskander: Ask what? What I learned about you in that one week that changed my tune?
Zelda: Indeed.
Iskander: Nothing vain about that. One of the first things I learned is that people don’t sing your praises enough. You work hard, princess—Your Highness. You oughta be proud of that. It’s not vain to want to hear why people admire you.
Zelda: [uncomfortable, doesn’t shift]
Iskander: In one week I saw you go through books as thick as you’re tall on the history and practices and customs and archives of all of Hyrule. You read more than a fish drinks. And you take your studies seriously. When you argued with your tutors and won, I wanted to cheer.
Zelda: [smiles]
Iskander: And your singing, Your Highness.
Zelda: Oh now I know that’s empty flattery. I can count on one hand the people who like my singing.
Iskander: You sing beautifully, Your Highness. The problem is that you sing from the heart.
Zelda: Why in the world is that a problem? I am singing in praise to the Goddess, I must sing with my entire being.
Iskander: Yeah. And you sing with every fiber of your being all those sad, heartbreaking songs. That’s why people say they don’t like your singing. You make them feel the heartbreak when they hear you. I bet if you sang happy songs, they’d feel happy too.
Zelda: …
Iskander: And you’re pious. I don’t think you get how pious. You’re singing hymns absently while you’re reading, you’ll quote the gospel when the court gets nasty—you handle those peacocks well, Highness. I was shocked when I learned you have social anxiety.
Zelda: [demurely] Moderate to significant stage fright, thank you.
Iskander: Heh. Oh and princess the things you do with ancient tech? Outstanding. I didn’t understand half of what you were picking up and putting down the one time I got to see you work at the Royal Tech Lab, but you were making results. It was clear in the way the others interacted with you that you were a well-respected peer.
Zelda: [blushes] You flatter me.
Iskander: You’re cool, Your Highness. You’re very cool. And Sir Link knew I’d be flogging myself like a monk who notices a pretty lady the minute I figured out how wrong about you I’d been.
Zelda: Hm.
Iskander:
Zelda: Is…is that it?
Iskander: [laughs] I’ve left you unfulfilled?
Zelda: It’s just…for how reticent Sir Link had been, I was expecting something more…juicy.
Iskander: Well, it might be that I’m not the only case Sir Link took on.
Zelda: What do you mean?
Iskander: Sir Link protects more than your person, Your Highness. He’s known for protecting your honor too.
Zelda: Nonsense! I’d have heard of it! The maids and soldiers gossip with the fervor that vines catch in the topiaries!
Iskander: It’s an open secret. And the nobles he shames tend to be too humiliated that they were outclassed by a soldier to go complaining about it.
Zelda: I’d have heard!
Iskander: With how hard you’ve been hitting your books?
Zelda: [blushes] Well.
Iskander: Sir Link didn’t say anything when my time was up. Just looked me up and down, figured I got the message, and never spoke to me again. If anything, that hurt more than a right hook to the jaw would’ve.
Zelda: Hm-hm. Yes, his silences can be properly scathing.
Iskander: …can I really keep this rum, Your Highness?
Zelda: By all means, yes. Heaven knows I don’t have the propensity for drink.
Iskander: Best don’t drink with Sir Link then.
Zelda: Sir Link drinks?
Iskander: Rarely, but he can hold his own.
Zelda: Fascinating. I should stick a Noble Pursuit under his nose one day, see how he fares.
Iskander: [laughs] You didn’t hear it from me!
Zelda: No, of course not.
Iskander: [laughs]
Zelda: I have one more question for you, Iskander.
Iskander: Yes, Your Highness?
Zelda: Surely, like Sir Link, you should be approaching the height of your career. Why are you no longer a knight?
Iskander: Hm. Well. Remember those drunk friends I mentioned at the beginning of the story?
Zelda: [frowns] Yes.
Iskander: I saw that the role Sir Link gave me was to nip that sort of chatter in the bud. ‘Specially now that I knew with my own two eyes what you were like, I could speak from a place of authority. You were nice. I told them to shut their trap.
Zelda: Yes…
Iskander: …when they didn’t, I shut it for them. One of ‘em didn’t wake up for a long, long time. Was dishonorably discharged not long after.
Zelda:
Iskander: Pardon me, Your Highness, I didn’t mean to frighten you. Anyway, your escort is here.
Zelda: Wha—Sir Link!
Sir Link: [falls from his perch in the tree after Iskander points him out]
Zelda: [blushing] How long had you been there?
Iskander: He’d been there from the beginning, Your Highness. [grins]
-
Zelda:
Link:
Zelda:
Link:
Zelda: Good night, Sir Link.
Link: [bows]
Zelda: [turns, pauses on threshold]
Link: ?
Zelda: [turns to him again, signs because guards are within earshot] Do you really go around defending my honor?
Link: [uncomfortable]
Zelda: [stares]
Link: [uncomfortable, signs] You can defend yourself, Your Highness.
Zelda: [signs] That’s not what I asked you.
Link: …[nods]
Zelda: [signs] Why?
Link: [signs] Because people are wrong.
Zelda: [signs] And you think it is your mission to correct them?
Link: [signs] If something is broken, it should be fixed.
Zelda: … [signs] I am capable of defending myself.
Link: [closes eyes, a little humiliated, nods]
Zelda: [snaps fingers]
Link: ? [looks up]
Zelda: [smiling, signs] But I thank you. That was immensely kind of you.
Link: … [signs] I don’t do it for thanks.
Zelda: [signs] I know. [smiles warmly]
Link: [shifts, uncomfortable, nods]
Zelda: [signs] Can I ask something else?
Link: [nods]
Zelda: [signs] What did those men say about me that inspired you to take such action with Iskander?
Link:
Zelda: ?
Link: …please don’t make me repeat it.
Zelda: !
Zelda: Understood. One last thing.
Link: [nods patiently]
Zelda: Is it true that I make people sad when I sing?
Link: [loses the fight against his wobbly smile] You sing to the places in people that are instinct. It …resonates…like a harp string. Like a big harp string, big as the world.
Zelda: [stunned]
Link: [carefully shutters reminiscing expression away]
Zelda: I…thank you for your honesty, Sir Link. Good night.
Link: [bows]
Zelda: [closes door]
Link: [immediately blushes in embarrassment]